Top Gear News : Series 17 (Best Moments)

time now to do the news yes you yes is the news now for people who think that there is just literally too much room in the back of a standard mini don't worry because there is now a coop a there it is he details I could tell you is between eighteen and twenty four thousand pounds and the top model has two hundred and eight horsepower now a lot of people have been talking about its roof unsurprisingly mini themselves say it's styled to look like a baseball cap being worn backwards I think this is a car that probably at night when you leave it entertains itself by spitting at the elderly they should have called it the lout Islam only wheels and put itself on bricks I like anyway before we do the news properly there's something I need to explain very very keen viewers may have noticed that this hour-long programme Top Gear is sometimes 62 or even 63 minutes long but this week BBC two have told us it must be 59 minutes no ifs or buts on the nose in fact all the programmes on BBC two tonight must be exactly to length because they're going at 10 o'clock alive to the MotoGP race yes I'm not interested in bike racing because you're not interested in something doesn't mean that the BBC should deny all the people who are the opportunity of seeing it might racing only works on YouTube what what you just see the crashes and then Simon obesity hands up if you want to see by tracing to so about eight percent of the population what you need to get some Lucas they do and I am one of them and so is James so we're gonna press on a start with the news news of an event coming up the Chumley pageant of power the what tumbling pageant of power Oh what our sexcellent were the world's biggest motoring show everybody when we begin the news with an item about a village fete no it's like a northern Goodwood Festival of Speed so a good would we pies and live it anyway the point is there's gonna be a car at it I wanted to show you it's this it's called the Brutus basically it's a 1908 I think in his BMW chassis made in the 1920s and it's got a 46 litre 12 cylinder air of 46 46 litre 12 cylinders I've got a shot of the engine here's the actual engine out of Turner paint it was steam speed and fire it's magnificent I'm gonna send that to Greenpeace so they can hang it up in there for a because it does not point 180 miles to the gallon when I love the engine but what fascinates me about old cars like this is one II people feel compelled to get into period cost you before driving them I mean we live in the 1970s house do you feel the need to wear a shirts from the 1930s attention morons everywhere Mercedes have a new Hardcore AMG version of one of their cars it's from they're especially ridiculous range of black edition oh now I'm sorry this is a car for connaissez now it's a couple yes it is people who know the difference for example between Sweden and Finland yes all right this is the new black edition of the c-class okay it'll cost you 110,000 pounds it's got the old 6.2 liter v8 tuned version of that rather than the twin turbo AMG engines of today you also get the seven-speed flappy paddle gearbox from an SLS not so good but I think it looks ridiculous I think it looks infantile James you are so old you think Werther's Originals are infantile can I just clarify this a little bit he has got the old sail cable yes I do and he and I went in it the other day and he loved it I hate it's ridiculous stupid it's like being in a touring car what's wrong with that no nothing at all if you're bun no let's say in a touring car race you want to use it let's imagine on a road in let's say the world absolutely you may mock thank you it's ridiculous the fact is that the CLK black is holding its value a lot better than I don't know 911s that you two have because they only sold a hundred of yes they did they did they would have sold many more but most of the people that turned up to buy them were wearing those jackets that do up at the back yeah eaten the Pens that you're supposed to use to fill the option sorry [Music] now have you noticed how some of the best-looking cars eaten by these days are like ordinary family saloons or hatchbacks or estates yeah in several sense the pics with their new ds5 it's a good-looking sort of ordinary midsize car everyday but it's not alone what's that Kier called from a while about the Rooney not the Rooney really oh yeah that was our for looking car but then they've now launched this which is called the something-or-other the optic isn't it optical Oh doesn't matter nobody who watches Top Gear is going to buy it here but if they do drivers are watching country fall on the other side girl it's Adams farm in a minute we're looking forward to that trial for what's on the other side why not a file simply a machine there's a clear when it's cold and Julia Brad Rizzo please the Peugeot 508 is a good-looking car as well isn't it if you've got a picture of it yeah I'm good what makes that particularly good is that pleasure is in recent years have had these sort of the big guppy mouths on them I can only impersonator Morgan do purchase but do any purge on your name 308 207 it's the people carry if you do that one yeah hang on this Isle stomping you know the tiny little one the one double-oh-seven with the electric sliding doors Oh exactly like that and then this is a Vauxhall Insignia I was following one of those the other day that's basically a veteran yeah fabulous really good to kind of great thing about it is it's got positive camber on its back wheels well you've got positive camber and you look ridiculous we've followed you round every airport in the world and you lumber along with your stupid legs bending out of the knee like that positive camber and you look looks good positive Kennedy's right I could nekkid Spitfire yeah pursuing that oil is leaking out that's because I'm set up for any blue mm you can find a hundred meter track that did that I could beat Usain Bolt they all play me you've been set up for cornering even shut up you look like a car that's how this wheels Nicks last week these two morons spent good money on to secondhand v12 coupe as they spent the same money as you'd spend on the Nissan Pixo which is the cheapest new car on sale in Britain and I was prepared to bet all of my hair that within two weeks one of them would have gone pot so chaps what's the news my BMW one hundred percent not a problem thank you still working perfect ladies fear yes I bought a Mercedes 600 CL yes you did it's quite interesting this because I have a photograph here that I'd like to share with everybody of the top gear car part there in fact is is Hammonds BMW working and where's your Mercedes warm and dry now moving on tell the ladies and gentlemen why it isn't in that space tell them one of its ignition coils has gone a bit wonky now it's interesting that you should say that because I did some research and I found out that the ignition coil for the Nissan Pixo is a hundred and thirty-eight pounds yes how much is it for the Mercedes eight hundred eight hundred and seventy eight sorry did that include her fitting did it include the v8 e no so what in fact was the cost of the new ignition call for your Mercedes so on thank you I keep my hair that's annoying now hey you know when you're pregnant and you go for a scan and they're able to tell whether it's a boy or a girl well very kind lady ascent is a photograph of a scan that she's had done of her forthcoming arrival and it seems to suggest she's giving birth to a Stig oh that's nice we're a bit worried about this because we told him time and again to stop impregnating people he made Michael Gambon pregnant twice it was not consolation it will probably be a very quick burst now can I just say as we know birds sometimes defecate on your car and at this time of year that's very bad for the paintwork as the lacquer is soft what where are you going miss me what I'm going is this a bird defecated on my car this week that's not that unusual might have happened to people here not like this okay I brought an iPad here I know how they work of course the bird yes some bird poo on your back window now that's a significant quantity of bird would you not you say that's a big bird that did that look at this you get stir there must be the end notice a metre of faeces bird can do a metre of these I'm two metres tall and I can't do a metre of faeces those red kites there and they are big birds they are big birds and they are carnivores now I examined this faeces ditch and there were seven cherry stones in it maybe it had a field mouse in it cherries you you're not certain if it's the cherry stones were in its gut it must have eaten the cherry hole which means it must have had a mouth like a Peugeot what kind of bird can have a gallon of guano in its gut I still take off and achieve sufficient altitude to defecate on my Range Rover anyone once a flying cow but James you really do live in Hammersmith don't you we should bear in mind this is the man who believes cows lay eggs I need eggs come from Cal have a competition on this if anybody can find a bigger piece of bird dirt Oh take a photograph and send it to us at Top Gear London where are we 7 w12 7ts mark your envelope you really are plumbing new depths this week this Han has a thing called launch control it's basically just a computer that sorts everything out for you see plant your foot Wham you have you get a perfect start every time and yes there's just one problem with launch control it is the stupidest thing ever fitted to a car why no seriously because if you think about it what you have to do to engage it right you series of switches and then you put your left foot on the brake plug your right foot hard down on the accelerator yeah and when the lights go green you take your foot off the brake and it goes computer sorts it out as you say so okay you have the lights not the most uncivilized thing you can do with the car is use launch control at a zebra crossing just say one other thing as well about norms control only one of us has it fitted to our car yeah true is it it's no control yeah I don't use it every time you need the pie shop thanks for the pies I'm off and now we must do the news and we start up with news that since James drove that Virage Aston Martin have launched a new Cup and here it is it's called the v12 Zagato there it is and James will be particularly interested in this mater I think well I yeah you will you will because the boss of the company was quoting this week saying the Nurburgring is where we sign off every 20 and there could be no better place for the new v12 Zagato to be finally tested said the boss of Aston Martin for crying everywhere you know I find being in Bomber Command in 1943 I would have bombed the Nurburgring every single night a mine only person who thinks like that this bad got yours would you say it makes you a bit crabby he's got a bad back as well but he won't the ride is important right all right vomits it was a bad policy look where we are now we no longer have Dresden Cathedral or all that lovely pottery but we do have the Nurburgring and under my bombing policy we wouldn't have cars that rode badly you'd have a nice Cathedral to look at in better sources [Music] let's move on yes let's move yes now we have been sent by a viewer a copy of a motorcycling magazine from 1976 we have a a picture of it here the front cover sort of thing you love that isn't it James mmm lovely what distressed is greatly was there was an advertisement on the back page for some letters and it was the model that was being used that is terrified us here it is [Applause] there is no point denying that it's you because he's wearing brown shoes it's got to be it is you you know that's exactly the same in 1976 when were you born I was only 12 you know I've speculated many many many times over the years on what sort of a man appears as a model in leather motorcycling side down there bad news a few weeks ago I held a small birthday party for the e-type Jaguar yes I recall in the subtle somebody else is having one at Silverstone the weekend of July the 22nd and they say a thousand e-types will be there I think what they mean is a thousand e-types will attempt to be there yeah on that particular day a thousand e-types will try and start yeah we'll be there maybe why will they be there there really but I've never understood that so you drive hundreds of miles in your car to look at some cars that are exactly the same as the car that you just drove there well there anyone here from a car owners club you are I mean this is which club the what Marlin and Lolly that's a fish that's a very lonely no it's a very lonely owners club that he goes and stands in a field all by himself there's anybody from a car club that's got more than one member well now Clio owners club do you go meet and stand in fields car parks make us hear anyone for the mg owners club we're not here obviously they'll be on the a3 go no I wonder sometimes do people who are mg enthusiasts buy them hoping they break down they didn't do that when I can get underneath it and get my fingernails all dirty no all they wanted to do is drive around in an open-topped two-seater they'd buy a Mazda mx-5 it's always gonna work exactly I think they're mad it's like being an amateur vet and saying I'm going to deliberately buy a dog that's poorly in the hope it goes wrong and I can fix it then we start with news you may have heard of this week a new flying car has been announced cost 150,000 pounds here's a shot of it in the air that's what it looks like as an airplane and here's a shot of it on the ground it just comes pre crashed there's an even bigger problem I've thought of which is I think everybody knows James you do have a light aircraft and before you take off you have to do preflight checks well a few yeah yeah what are they well you have to check the fuel that's what got me why'd you set your fuel as I got water in it how would water got time for this we haven't got time it's invite Racing yes tell me more about never fly actually you know what even I would rather watch bike racing than listen to James talk about you preflight checks to get off so I will move it on think of a device fitted to modern cars that's more stupid than launch control you're fitted to quite a lot like ismo like gizmo what stupid in years there's some brilliant things for if you need it in could not fall out yet no though I haven't been actually a really good one it's Mercedes and BMW now for a night-vision camera okay so you can travel on at night and the dashboard has got this screen showing you what's on the road ahead so I was trying enough a country lane the other day single track okay doing them at 60 miles an hour which is legal middle of the night I thought but I'm gonna try and drive just using the night vision turn the lights off yeah look down to see where I was going and it's just a message saying night vision not available when lights off forgive me that's night-vision the only works in the light something for snipers would it just lights on no last year my CLK Mercedes this you may think you're stupid but it's very determined ok my C ok it said one day when I got in it 24 days until the next service and I mentioned this on the program a year ago ok and I thought wonder what'll happen if I take it to 25 days because it's German brain won't be able to compute the fact that somebody has disobeyed a direct order thing was on the 24th day or whenever it was Mercedes turned up while I was out and took it away for a service really annoyed me good news yesterday suddenly said nine days until service dude brilliant what I've done this time it isn't if parked it in a london underground garage and i'm not going to tell anybody which one because i want to see what happens if it goes to minus one oh that's dangerous it could panic in the same format or it's probably already been building a glider so it can escape that's why i've put it in an underground car park and not a multi-storey so it can't fly away it's probably been specially trained to take a cyanide pill it's massive wheel arches rats and i must end it now so when I get back to it you think it'll be dead now there's a company in America called SSC and a few years ago they brought had a car called the arrow which for a time was the fastest car in the world verified by Guinness faster than the Bugatti Veyron well now they've come up with another new car but a picture of it here we have no details at all but we do know its name it's called V what's interesting is it's going to be a rival for the new Pagani the replacement for the Zonda it's called the hoorah no spell hu a yr other choice now if you're a wealthy person between the top all the car makers now naming their cars after the noises people make when they're punched in the stomach news now it's not good news it's just some news okay mg is back this is the new car here it is it's called the mg 6 you can have it as a saloon or as a hatchback it's supposed to be very modern in every way but I don't think the factory where it's being made in Longbridge is modern at all because got the press release they sent out here and it says the first car was driven off the line by the only woman who works there no when they go on to say and best of all she has a smashing pair of knocking tell me it says next don't worry chaps we'll let her drive it off but we won't let her park the other thing about this is okay we know that this is made in China by the linking wanking Donkey Corp every corporation industry right okay and then it shipped over to Birmingham where they fix an mg badge on it okay and then sell it but they say in the actual brochure which I've got here it's talks about them more and breaking land speed records right and says the mg embodies British sporting style I think the only British sportiness in that is the glue they used to fix on the badge is made from a dead British racehorse is the only sporty thing in that car I reckon oh wait a minute sure they have the press release okay they sent us has got a typo on it I think this indicates the car will be a big hit absolute bollocks now last weekend James brought you news of a new Range Rover called the evoke well this week there's more new Range Rover news there's a new sport now what's interesting about this is it has voice control okay with what Land Rover call a say what you see function in order to get the car to do things okay brings up words on the screen and then you repeat them well that's the points of this is you have a picture of the object next to it it was that you could have enormous fun with foreign markets like in Germany you could bring up a picture of a squirrel why no because you think about it all Germans no matter how well they speak English can't say squirrel right what's this oh that would be a squiggle any glass regions here really come here where are you I want to just test just talk that we are you actually from Glasgow yes right could he say burglar alarm [Applause] anyway there you go a couple of other things about it it's got an 825 watt stereo in it what all the Motorhead a lot more 17 speakers and I'm sorry but that front end is hideous I don't know why they don't have just done with that car and just call it the Wilmslow the day is coming when they fit that with fake pillars on either side of the door I'm warming Louis Hamilton you may have heard it's been in the news this week saying that the national anthem is too short and that when he's on the podium he got really milked the moment because it's over in 44 seconds and he says it's not fair because when Massa wins who's Brazilian that national anthem goes on for 16 hours so I've had an idea why don't we change our national anthem ville wish you were here Pink Floyd 27 minutes of hell the problem isn't that ours is too short is that everybody else's is too long for the Greek one is a hundred and fifty eight verses what it is a hundred that promised you the Greek national anthem is that how many times can you say we're completely screwed so you're saying ours is too they're all too long I think we could set an example to the world actually with the Olympics coming up in 2012 I'm making national anthems a bit shorter we could get ours pared right down what what center we hope she's victorious and lives a long time that's too long not very because I'm thinking more along the lines of it did littered it podium exactly well you'd have to have the role on the drum so that people got ready to they did it I like it it's actually a brilliant idea there is a new BMW m5 we can tell you several things about it first of all it'll cost 73 thousand pounds secondly it's based on the current 5 Series which we think is one of the best-looking cars around that looks even better thirdly the engine for the first time ever in an m5 is turbocharged because of some air problem carbon dioxide has to be cleaner and it also even though I haven't driven it be fantastic to drive I know that I will actually all n fives have always been fantastic there's never been a bad word you know there hasn't this there's a lot on this as well a lot a lot of equipment it's got a rear view camera it's also got a multimedia system that can bring that Facebook and Twitter I don't want any why would you want me that's what you're driving at the a1 no look Lily Allen's having sardines in Notting Hill as interesting necessary having a fighter pilots have Twitter on there - yes I'm locked onto target I'm committed you hang on a second Stephen Fry's just said something brainy about a plane oh I really do think we get too much information we'll be driving around now I mean those signs that say spray possible which on a nice day in June it isn't and you know those posters okay that used to be adverts that said drink food and eat beer or whatever it is on them yeah use toothpaste well now they've made them electronic and Sky News has got one and it gives you slip it's of news as you drive by now I was driving past one the other day okay if it was short it's quite long so you going JK Rowling Sachs agent after C that's funny I was driving down the eighth or T just asked you the other day and the headline was quite brief it said clots and has a massive accident many recently announced ok a new car it's called the mini inspired by Goodwood stupid name stupid price 41,000 pounds for a million 41 grand however Aston is now gone one better okay got this new car it's called the Cygnet and Colette and that's 43 we should point out that is a Toyota iQ yes it starts out in life as an 11 grand Toyota Aston Martin take the Toyota badges off put Aston Martin ones on price goes up to 31,000 they've now added the Colette badges 43 grams so hang on what do you get for that extra 12 grand on Thomas you need to look inside because what you get are here they are two cushions wait a minute what is the Cygnet and Colette Cygnet and Colette sounds like lap dancing duo from Leeds well ice-skating view those we know we know that the Sigma part is an Ashley Martin Cygnet it's the collect think with gorty's collect because it sounds like a feminine hygiene product I made a mistake did you you get more than just the cushions I do apologize you also get quilted Sun visors some biscuits I'm reading this out I'm just quoting what you get a guide to Paris a plastic camera an empty bottle and four compilations see these featuring bands such as the morning benders they're telling you a small Toyota full of plot you

Channel: Hell Toréer 2

Views: 3,103,011

Rating: 4.6836705 out of 5

Keywords: Top Gear News, Season 17, Best Moments, Top Gear, Series 17, Laughs, top gear funny moments, Jeremy Clarkson, James May, Richard Hammond, Launch Control

Id: tHqjmSTCw88

Length: 31min 27sec (1887 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 04 2020