God is intense but he's fun.
Jesus I need help. Every time, every time i get to share my heart
my heart is just, just trembling inside. Because I don't just want to entertain anybody
ever. I just want to be in love.
Privately, and publicly I want to be in love in front of everyone
But most of all I wan to live with the complete, the complete understanding that God's eyes
are on me every second of every day. That his eyes are always watching.
I am so thankful to be born again, and in 3 more years, it'll be 15 it's been
12 and it's been amazing! I look at people that have been born again
for 50 years and you know when I first got saved and
I'm like "Oh my gosh, this has got to be amazing!" "You've known about this for 50 years?!"
and people's response was "Well yeah" I'm like "Ahh"
People told me, "You know, your've got to be careful Todd, becasue you're running way
to hard, you have to be very careful, this is a maration
not a sprint" But I couldnt fint that in my Bible, I can't
find it, I just can't find that, it's no where in here.
I looked for marathon, it's not in there. It's a race.
It's run a race, It says run a race.
I don't fight as one that beats the air, I don't shadow box with the enemy.
I live in a place of a love relationship with my father,
who knew how twisted I was, and knew how wacked out I was and yet he said
"I want that one right there!" See this is crazy because I lived a horrible
life and hurt people my whole life. You know for 34 years no body shared the gospel
with me, no body shared the good news.
Everybody was doing something, but they weren't sharing with me
and I"m not pointing a finger at anybody and I love the body of Christ.
I think we really need to know and understand who we are
and who we serve. We need to understand the goodness of God
and just how much he loves us. People are dying.
People are dying! People are going to hell!
Hell is real. People are like, "Well I don't believe in
that" Well I'm sorry, Jesus talked about it more
then anybody. Like hell is real.
People say like "This world is hell" I thought that.
You know? For all my life I was addicted to drugs, and athism and hatred and anger
and everything and I thought this world is hell.
I didn't even believe in God, I just thought this world is hell and if I
die it's gonna be better. but man, I was decieved but nobody came up
to me and told me how decieved I was. Maybe it's simpler then what we've made it.
Maybe it's way less complicated. You know when Jesus came and snached me up
out of darkness and he's like, "I want you to know me."
Like I didn't come like a lot of people come to the alter and come to Jesus, and it's aweosme
and then eveythig changes. Like for me I got shot at.
I had this major encounter, I had this encounter with God.
I ripped off this drug dealer and he unloaded a 9mm at me, from 10 ft away!
And I heard a voice "I took those bultes for you, are you ready to live for me yet?"
I mean 10 ft away! I didn't even know what, "live for me" meant!
Live for him, what does that even mean? I had an encounter with grace.
Grace is so beautiful. I love the definition,
you know you look at the word "Grace", it comes from the word "charis."
But one of my favorite parts of the definition, my favorite,
is "the devine inspiration of God upon the heart,
with the outward reflection of God upon the life."
Grace! Grace is the devine inspiration of God upon
my heart with the outward reflection of him upon my life!
you know Collossian 3:17 says, " Whatever you do"
Whether you're pumping gas, wheather you're a teach,
whether you're a lawyer, whether you're a school kid,
whether you're in elementary school, whether you're in nusery school,
everything that you do, you're to do it as unto the Lord and not for people.
That doesn't mean that I don't serve people and love people,
that just means that everything that I do, I want to have my Father in first place in
my life. Not second place, not third place, not fourth.
It's not just for a worship place, it's not just for a conference.
God forbid it could be just for a conference God forbit it could just be on a Sunday,
or a Friday night, or a Wednesday night home group!
God forbid it wouldn't be 24 hours a day and 7 days a week to be in love with him
and to know him! People are like, " Man I'm called to do what
you do." But what is it that you think I do?
Because if it's just to preach and to have a pulpit,
this is just a tiny minute of the time! I live in love with Jesus,
I live without condemnation, I live without shame.
I live that way, it's been 12 years! With not guilt, no shame, no condemnation.
No regret! Like it's real!
People are like, "Well that's not for everybody." Yes it is!
It's a free gift, just unwrap it. It says that we, you and I, us,
the body of Christ is to reign as kings in this life,
through the free gift of righteousness and the ubundance of grace.
That word abundance means violently excessive ammout.
So I am to reign as a king, not just to say, "look at me!"
But reign as loyalty, a loyal priest, a holy nation set appart.
I am to reign with Jesus, not to reign like, "look at me, I'm a preacher."
No, to reign in righteousness, in right standing with God.
To believe that I've been fully forgivin, to believe that I've been fully washed with
the blood of Jesus! Fully cleaned.
Because repentance is a lifestyle, it's not a one time moment.
It's not when I come up to the alter and say, " God please forgive me."
It's not a begging God to forgive you. Repenctence is a lifetime,
repentance is changing the way that I think, that my mind has been washed.
You know Second Corinthians, it's just so amazing,
I love the whole gosple, Ok? But I don't have time to take you in there,
but I'm just going to tell you a whole lot. Are you ready?
I just put it in, I go in the secret place, I go in and seek my father,
and I say, "God I don't even know what to say."
And he says "Todd, just open your mouth and I'll do it."
So second Corinthian chapter 11 verse 1, says " Oh that you would bare with me in a
little foolsihness, and indeed you do bear with me...."
"...for I have betrothed you, I am jealous for you with a godly jealously."
A godly jealously! Like in my life I burn with this passion,
with this fire, with this flame, inside of me, and I've found out that it's
in the Bible, It's called godly jealousy,
I love God, I have been in love with God, I am in love with my father.
People say, "Well you know that God loves you."
But do you know that you are loved by him? The difference between knowing that God loves
you and knowing that you are loved by him, is an active lifestyle of being loved by him
eveywhere I go. It's the love of the Father, the grace of
our Lord Jesus Christ, and communion with the Holy Gost.
It's communion with the Holy Spirit where he's on me all the time.
He's in me, he loves me, he is totally overwhelmed by me!
That's not arrogance, that's Godfidance! It's different.
People have told me, "Well that's arrogant, you can't think that way."
Well read the Bible, it's in there. I just believe it.
I read it I believe it. I don't read it and say "well then why..."
I read it and go "Gosh, thank you, are you serious?! Yay!"
I'm serious, when I read the Bible I'm just like "AHH" "Yes!"
I don't go, "Well then why...?" I don't question God.
He's amazing, he's the one who set this thing up, he chose me, I didn't choose him.
Like he choose me, like I was twisted, do you know that he chose me even before I
knew to choose him? I know that's crazy, but like...
Ok, ready? When my Mom and my Dad came together,
when they came together... Are you ready?
We'll start here, we'll start with creation here,
of you, because all of you came the same way, all of you.
Only Jesus came another way, but we all came this way.
There was a man, and there was a woman, and they came together.
A man and a woman came together. My mom and my dad came together.
They weren't thinking, "Let's have a son!" They were thinking, "You look good."
It's truth. Doesnt' matter where they were in life, it
doesn't matter whether they were Satan worshippers, it doesn't matter whether they were this,
it doesn't matter, they just came together. And so when they came together, all of a sudden,
in a birth cannal, in a birth cannal, 80 million chances are
headed toward the egg. 80 million!
Plus or minus a million or so. But that's a lot.
Eighty million chances of me are headed for the egg.
And everybody else is faster than me. Everybody else is faster than me and they
get to the egg and it's .....(waaawaaawaa noises)
They're trying to get it in. Jackhammers, sledge hammers, (saw noises)
trying to get in. Mask on, goggles on, everything, (saw noises)
It's true. I was there, I know. (laughter)
Eighty million are ahead of me, they're all trying to get in.
And then when I get there, I'm the last one. The last one.
But when I get there, I don't have a tool, I don't have a sledge hammer, I don't have
a jack hammer. I don't have anything.
When I get there they part like the Red Sea. You split the sea!
And when I get there, I just go WOOP!...Right in the egg.
No tool, no nothing. I don't have anything. And I'm inside the egg and I hear all these
voices: "How'd they get through?" "How'd they get
by?" "Who pushed me out of the way?"
Then they all went somewhere. And then from inside the egg...here I am.
"Sorry guys!" I don't know anything else to say, so I say this:
"Sorry guys...I was predestined from the foundation of the world."
'Cause I don't know life. I don't know any of this.
I don't know rejection. I don't know my parents.
I don't know what my mom did or what my dad did.
I don't know what they say. I don't know what it's like to have people's
backs turned on me. All I know is that I just came from the Father,
because all life comes from God. ALL life comes from God!
Regardless of how you came in. Regardless of if your parents were drunk.
Regardless of WHATEVER! None of that matters!
What matters is that you understand that God knit you in your mother's womb.
God knit you in your mother's womb. It's true.
How could a mother's rejection who didn't understand who she was,
because her soul was twisted, and whacked out and warped.
And came from sinning, and from not knowing who God was.
How could your mother's thoughts, and the things she said when you were being formed
in her womb by God, affect who you are as a person?
Then you come out and your're born into this world,
and you're born into sin. The first word out of a child's mouth is "MINE!"
You put two-year-olds in a room, you put one toy.
It's not hard to figure out what happens next. "MINE" One of them's gonna take that thing,
and it's like" Me mo mine, mine, mine". But we're taught that and then when it's nurtured,
but in Christianity, when someone gets born again,
it changes everything. Because now you got a brand new Dad,
and He's the best Dad ever. But if I don't see Him as the best Dad ever,
I'll live limited. If I don't pick up my Bible,
and find out what I've been born into. I will live by what everybody else says.
I will live by preacher, to Youtube video, to pator, to teaching.
Then all the sudden I'll have all these different things,
I'll have all these different tools. And my tool belt will be so heavy,
that I'll be weighted down, because I don't know the One who helps me
use them. And He's the Holy Spirit.
(Clapping) I have to know who I am
and Whose I am. My identity is not for sale.
Listen to me, When someone gets born again
God expects this. He says this:
"Oh that you'd bear with me in a little foolishness, and indeed you do bear with me, I am jealous
for you in a Godly jealously, for have betrothed you, I have set you up.
I have BETROTHED you, to one husband.
It's what he says. It's says in Chorinthians 11: right there,
1,2,3. "I have betrothed you to one husband,
that I may present you...present you... as a chaste virgin." One that's never slept
with the world before. One that's soul has never been with the world
before. I have desired, I have betrothed you, I have
set you up. I have set you up to be betrothed, to be,
to be set up, ready for wedding, betrothed you to one husband.
That I may present you as a chaste virgin. One that's never been that's never been with
the world before. One whose soul has never been in this world
before. When we get born again, what happens is that
the blood of Jesus is the recognized and understood what full pardon is.
And the reality of fully being washed from our sin.
It's an epidemic. I feel like I spin my wheels just to expain
covenant. I don't have anything else to talk about.
People are like: "How are you so free?" Well I believe that I'm forgiven. Like, no,
like, really. That He didn't just forgive me, He forgot
about it. He'll never bring it up again. He forgot.
He said I'm going to throw it into a sea. And I'm going to name that sea Forgetfulness.
I'm going to throw it in there. And you cant remember it because I don't.
The Love of God! I loved last night, about the heart. The Love.
The fiery love.The reality of the love of God.
The reality of who God has called us to be. It's just that simple.
You know, I was sitting on a plane with some guy.
On the way here. Because this to me, this is a lifestyle man.
This isn't just :" I'm gonna go preach at this service."
and neglect everybody on the way. I love people, man.
God loves people. God's given me two commandments.
He said: "All, ALL the law and the prophets hang on two"
Jesus made it easy. Love God with all my heart, my soul, my strength
and my mind. Love God with all my heart, all my soul, all
my strength, and my mind. Love Him with all my mind. With everything
that's in here. You know, if you love God with all your mind,
you're hands can no longer cause you to sin. On come on. If I love God with all my mind,
my hand can't say," I'm going over here to do this."
My mind doesn't say,"Oh, OK, I'll follow." That's not how it works, man.
Grace is a teacher. He says "Deny, deny ungodliness."
I don't want that stuff. I'm in love.
Self control. I heard a really amazing man. You might have
heard of him. His name's Bill Johnson.
I honor him with all my heartl Lord help me.
He says :"Self control" I heard this when I was just very new,
"Self control is being so focused on His voice that everything else loses its voice."
And I'm like: Oh God! That's it! You're amazing. Why would I want these other voices when I've
heard Yours And You've called my name.
He loves me. He's passionately in love with me.
God....loves me. See, to me, the cross wasn't just, I didn't
just come to the cross and see the revelation of my sin,
I saw the cross as the revelation of my value. Because heaven went bankrupt to get me back.
Heaven gave up everything because God saw me.
Me. I'll personalize it. That's arrogance. No, that's confidence.
I'll just believe who God says I am. God saw me and "I want that one. Yeah that one's addicted,
the one that's twisted, That one that needs massive deliverance. That
one that's been raised by Masons. That one that's just been totally twisted.
That one that's practiced witchcraft. That one that thought he could be reincarnated.
That one, that one, that one that's hurt everybody, that stole from everybody.
I want THAT one. And people are like:
"You're lucky you're like a drug addict for so long, you have an amazing testimony.
I wish I was a drug addict." People say that to me!
That's crazy, don't wish that! You have an amazing testimony, I wish I had
a testimony like that. See, if you'd see the reality of God's Holiness,
and His beauty, and the reality of, of what it means to be
right with God. 613 laws and 10 commandments to be right with
God. And if you're diligent and obey each and every
one all day and all night. Without missing one, THEN you can be right
without God in your own strenghth. So see, me twenty-two years of addiction,
and atheism and anger and hatred. Me that did all these thiings.
When I came to Jesus, I just believed that He completely forgave me, and washed it all
away. He did, but you were equally as twisted, and
sinful as me. " No,no,no, you were way worse than me."
Be careful. That's self righteousness. People say:"Well I grew up in church, you're
lucky." No. It's not about luck. This isn't some rabbit's
foot. It's about the blood of Jesus. The same Mercy.
The same blood of Jesus. The same covenant God made with me, He made
with you. The same forgiveness He gave me, he gave you.
The same. What can wash away my sin? Nothin' but the
blood of Jesus. What can make me whole again? Nothin but the
blood of Jesus. Oh precious is that flow, that makes me white
as snow. No other fount I know.
Nothin' but the blood of Jesus. The same blood.
That we sing about. The same blood, that we cry when that song
is sung. The same blood that washed me, washed you.
The same blood. God's enabled me to live in a place where I look forward and never behind.
God's enabled me to look, put my hands to the plow and never look back.
Because he who looks back isn't fit for the Kingdom.
This isn't my message. It's the Gospel. It's the Good News.
He forgave me, He forgave you. He didn't forgive me more than He forgave
you. You see. If you missed one law, you missed
them all. If you transgressed on, you transgressed them
all. God's standard of Holiness reiterates the
law and says that if one law is broken, you have
broken them all. So if you broke one, you broke 613 and 10.
You broke 613 and 10! So all of us have been equally forgivin.
You have the woman in Luke 7, that came and busted in the house.
And annointed Jesus's feet with the alabaster jar,
broke it, bang! Washed it, and the Pharisee were like,
If this man knew what kind of woman this was, he would never let her touch his feet.
Simon suppose you have two, one owed a little, one owed a lot.
But the master knew that neither could repay, neither could repay.
And this woman who's sins are many becasue she has been forgivin much, she'll
love much. The master knew neaither could repay, so he
let the 50 go and let the 500 go, which one will be more loved?
Why I suppose the one who he forgave more, because we get it with money.
But God equally forgave us all. But everytime you dig up and revisit things
that Jesus said are finished, you can't stand in the love of God.
You stand in condemnation. And Jesus paid a price to set us free from
guilt and shame, and condemnation! And full pardon, leads us into a place of
full repentance. But repentance isn't one time, repentance
is a lifestyle I change the way I think and I look at things
from God's perspective. Collossians 3 says, "Set your mind on things
above and not benieth." So I'm going to look from heaven towards earth,
I'm not going to work toward victory, I'm going to live from it.
It's just a different way, it's the way Jesus paid a price to be.
Old covenant, new covenant. Old testiment, it doesn't mean you throw it
away, just means all of it is summed up in what
Jesus did. Are you guys with me?
A little? So good, amazing, Yay!
Oh my gosh, this is amazing, I will be more free after this meeting
I'm like, I'm just so in love, I'm just in love, he's good
He's a love, he's a love that I've never not know in 12 years,
I've always just known it I wake up in love.
I wake up in the morning "Oh my gosh, thank you!"
I'm serious, I woke up this morning that way. So I'm on a plane sitting beside this guy,
and he's sitting there I got sat down and he kind of turns his head,
A lot of people do, it's ok. You know what, do you know what's amazing?
Is that I found out in my Bible, that I have been accepted in the beloved.
Do you know what that means? That means that I have never been rejected.
Oh this is awesome! I have been accepted in the beloved.
When I found out who Jesus says I am, and when I dive into the reality of who God
has called me to be, I am not rejected, I'm accepted.
So how could a man, a woman, a child, a collegue, a boss, a church,
how can they take away what they never gave me?
Oh come on! When I walk up to somebody and they're mad
at me, they're not mat at me, they're just mad at
my beliefe system, because their beliefe system is twisted.
But I'm not calling them twisted. See my war is not against people.
Look, there's a lot of people that are hurt by the church.
They're devistated by the church because they've been rejected and they haven't been noticed.
They haven't been put into a pulpit, they haven't been givin the opportunity to preach
or whatever. They wouldn't notice me.
The only reason you'd think that way is because you don't know that you've already been noticed
by the Father. "Yeah well you don't know what they did to
me." Well Ok...
People say; " Well they're going to get what they deserve."
Well if you want what you deserve, go to hell then.
Go to hell! Cool.
Take what you deserve. No one wants that.
Do you know that people get hurt? Oh yeah, this is a good one to talk about.
We've got a lot of people, this is great. I won't take a show of hand of everybody that
has been hurt by the church, we're not going to do that.
But if you got hurt by somebody, it's because they didn't know who they were when they did
it. But if you got hurt by somebody, it's because
you didn't know who you were when it came. Either way, it's an identity crisis on both
ends. If somebody hurt me and did something to me
that they shouldn't have, it could of been because my expectation was
in the wrong place and I have no idea who God created me to be.
And if I'm waiting for somebody to give me a pulpit to preach,
but I'm not willing to go out into the market pace or out into Walmart...
Just go to Walmart, man! Just go to a drug store,
go to a hanicap parking place. There's somebody to pray for.
You'll find somebody, just look for the blue tag!
Just wait! Oh yeah!
"I just need somebody to pray for." Go to a handicap place and wait.
Just wait! They're coming,
eventually they're coming" Even if they have a fake tag, they're still
going to be there, it doesnt'matter!
What are we doing? "Let me preach."
Who cares about this?! Just let your life be a display of his goodness,
and realize that Jesus was the light of the world.
Now he says you're the light of the world, go out there and love people!
Be posessed by God to love people. So I'm sitting on the plane sitting next to
this guy, I'm getting there, sorry.
Yay! So this guy, he wakes up,
and I go "Hey man how you doing?" Because he's tired, and I am too, but I need
to talk to you about Jesus. So I said " Dude"
I noticed that he had a boot cast and I'm sitting beside him on a plane.
Like one of those boots, because something's wrong.
And I said, "I noticed you put a boot up top there before you went to sleep."
I said, "I just want to know what happened man?"
"Oh I just fractured my ankle" I said, "No way?!"
He goes, "Why?" I said, "Because I know the fixer of broke."
He's like, "Ok" So I started to share my heart with him and
he goes, "Well who are you?"
I said, "I'm one who God loves." He says, "I"m Jewish"
I go, "Oh well, he first loved you." It's true!
I'm like, "Yes, this is amazing!" I said "Ah, I"m so glad I get to sit beside
to you, I've been to Israel, I'm like so excited,
Wow really? You're Jewish but you don't really believe it do you?"
He goes, "Well I mean, you know my family is Jewish"
I said, "But yeah like, if I were to go into a grauge, that doesn't make me a car."
"Like if I go to McDonalds, it doesn't make me a BigMac."
" Your point?" I go, "Well let me share my heart with you."
So I share my testimony with him. He's like, "Wow, that's really awesome man!'
I'm like, "Well yeah, you know what I think?" "I think Jesus wants to heal your foot."
"Well you know, I don't do Jesus" I'm like, "I know, I didn't either, then he
did me." And he's like, "OK"
I go, "So what I'd like to do, I'd like to demonstrate to you what I'm talking
about." He goes, " What does that look like?"
I said, "You just hold still, and let me pray for you."
And he's like, "OK." And I said, "Is that cool with you?"
Whether it was cool or not, I was going to. I just want him to be ok.
And he told me, " Well you know what I do." I go, "What?"
He goes, " I speak to people about eating disorders."
I said " That's aweosme man!" He goes "What do you do?"
I go, "I love people." "OK"
He's thinkng "I really don't want you to touch me right now!"
So just to reassure him, I go, "That's my wife and all my kids."
He's like "Cool" I said "You see that little boy over there?"
He goes "Yeah" See my amazing wife, she's here.
Stand up, amazing wife. Yay!
You want to come up here and preach? No, she's good!
So I said," 'My amazing wife' because we were together for 9 years,
and twistedness and then Jesus came and completely rocked our world."
"And I went away to a rehab and came back in 2 months,
and this amazing woman, and I got married a coulple days later,
like in between 1st and 2nd service, because no one really wanted to come to our wedding."
"Because it want about people coming to my wedding.
It was about a big covenant, not big wedding. It was about a coventat that God made with
me that he would never break, so I made conetant with this woman."
It's the same. And so I share with him and he goes, "Ok."
And I'm sharing aobut my daughters, "That 20 yo, that's that little 7 and a half
y.o that I destroyed for all those years and then Jesus."
He's like, "Wow, ok." And I said, And this little 10 year old
right here, she's just on fire, she loves Jesus."
And this guy is just freaked out. I go "No I've got this little 5 year old,
if she was up here, she'd be praying for you right now."
He goes, "OK" I said, "You see that little boy, he's 6 months
old? "Yeah"
He goes "Wow, you finally got a boy." I go, "Yeah but my girls are amazing."
I said, "He was born of Father's day." He goes "Yeah?"
I said " He was born to a lady that was hooked on herion for 20 years,
He was botn on Fathers day and they brought him out of her belly and they brought him
right to us." "We're adopting him, he was born hooked on
heroin." "I got to hold my baby for the first time,
and he's so beauttiful." "Totally accepted by God, totally addicted
to heroin." "Because in the next 24 hours he started to
show signs and he has to go to a rehab and get put on Methadone."
He goes, "Dude, thats horrible, I can't believe that people did that!"
I said, "Would you understand that I'm a guy that did that for 22 years?"
He goes, "Oh yeah, yeah, yeah." I said, "And as a father I"m holding my baby,
he's just so wonderful, so lovely, so amazing." "He's just this little tiny baby that has
never known the world before." "He's just never know that twisted in the
world and he comes out innocent, addicted." He goes, "That's horrible!"
I go, "Yeah." I said, "It is, that's the way I lived."
He goes, " Oh yeah." He goes, "Dude, why would someone give you
a baby?" I said, "That's just it, I love people!"
He goes, "Oh yeah" He goes "What is going on right now?"
He said, "I feel like scrambled eggs". Yeah!
I said, "Yeah so when he comes out and I get to go to this rehab, with this baby in the
hospital." "You know in the hospital that we were adopting
this baby from, 3 to 4 out of 10 kids are addicted to herion, in America?"
"Come out just complete, and the women are condemd and beat up and are horribly hurting."
" And I'm in this rehab and I'm getiing to walk around, in the rehab I've got this hospital
gown." "So I go into the room and we go into there
the first time." My wife has been there because I had a conference
for some days... Am I fading? Can you hear me?
Can you hear? Ok, I'm here, I'm moving.
So I had a conference for this first couple days and my wife was in there,
and I came back in and there is women in there that are condemd.
It's their 2nd or 3rd kid that have been born in addiction and the nurses are totally angry
because they're like; "Now they"re doing it again."
They don't understand the nature of addiction and how horrible it is.
And only Jesus and the mercy of God can take them out, I don't care you are.
People are like; " Well I've been through NA."
Well I came through Jesus, I went through a place,
22 years of addiction, I did the one step program.
I submitted to God, and in my submisstion to God, the devil is rejected.
But I have to submit to full pardon, I have to submit to fully forgivin, I have to sumbit
to full surrender. Or else I have stuff that shouldn't be there,
because Jesus finished it, and crushed that stuff,
and the hand writing of the requirements that were against me were nailed to him on the
tree. Everything that I had wished I'd never done
was nailed to him on Calvery. Completely gone.
And so now I'm in a rehab with all these woman that are condemded and beating themselves
up. I come into the room and I'm like, "Hey!"
And the nurse is like, "Oh hey." And I'm like, "No, No, God loves you!"
"Yep, thanks" and walks right out. I'm like "Oh my gosh!"
Well the great thing is she's got to come back, beacsue I'm going to be in there all
day. All day!
So I'm praying in there for my boy, and he's shaking, crying and I have to give him Methedone.
I hate drugs man, hate them. Hate what they do to people.
I hate pornagraphy, I hate what it does to people, I hate it.
I don't hate people, I love people. See I was addicted to pornagraphy, I was addicted
to drugs, I was addicted to me.
And then I got free from me. And if I'm free from me, I'm free from you!
Oh, I'm serious, I love you but I don't need you to ove me back to feel ok about loving
you! I'm serious!
You know that even if you don't tell God you love him, He's not going to loose the
thrown, he's not going to be like, "I can't believe
this, they didn't tell me back? You've got to be kidding."
That's not God. Like he is love, you can't take it away from
him. And God wants me to be just like him.
Because, "As he is, so are we." As he is love.
This is amazing! So this Jewish guy on the plane is like,
"Wow" I'm like, " Man, so awesome, you know we have
like 3 hours left?" No one's safe man!
You're locked in a steel tube, 35 thousand feet,
nobody is safe. I'm so serious.
Yes I want to sleep, yes I need rest, but I, I could be the last voice they hear
before it's the end. I can't stand that.
Well that's too much to put on you. No, no, no, it's a previlege.
I get to represent him, I get to love people, I get to pray for people,
I get to lay my hands on the sick, I get to prophesy.
All the gifts are mine. All of them, mine.
Period. The Holy Sprit is my friend.
He says that I can walk in the same spirit, the same spirit that raised Jesus from the
dead, is mine. The same spirit that raised Jesus from the
dead, lives in me. He will quicken my mortal body.
That is now, ritght here. In my mortal body, he wants to quicken me
all day, every day. I hunger and thirst for righteousness, and
I'm going to be filled. Filled to overflowing everywhrere I am.
Anwhere I see the demonic, anywhere I see the anger and frustration,
and anywhere I see the devil with his hands that come to steal, kill, and destroy,
eveywhere he is, I'm going to cut his fingers off.
Every night I'm going to go to bed with blood on my sword,
every day I'm going to wake up and I'm going to slay devils.
Every day I'm going to cast out demons every day.
I'm going to heal the sick, I'm going to prophesy every day!
I"m going to have wisdom from God everyday, becaue God has givin me the spirit of wisdom
and revilation in the knowledge of him. Everyday, I'm going to walk in that everyday.
I'm going to crush hell every day. I'm going to 1 John 3:8 for the same reason
that Jesus was made manifest, he was made manifest to destroy the works of the devil
everyday. So that's the mission statement for the Christian,
to destroy hell for a living. Because Christ is in us, he's the hope of
glory. But Christ coming out of us is that hope revieled,
that hope being made manifest. I'm going to walk fully filled, fully filled
by God every day! Fully filled.
I have a fountian inside of me that never runs dry,
I have a love that never gives up, it never runs out on me.
I have a father that is always pleased with me.
And because I understand what he thinks of me,
I always want to do the things that please him.
I don't have to, I get to! I get to walk in this life and destroy hell
everyday, I get to see people come to Jesus everyday,
everywhere I go, nobody is going to stop me. You know why? Because the devil has been defeated!
That's why. That's why!
Some people don't like it, get over you! I'm free from you, I love you.
You'll say, "Well I don't beileve in that." I've seen it so, It's over.
Every day I get to see it. Every day!
Every day I get to see God touch people. "Seek first the kingdom and his righteousness"
The Kingdom, people think, "Well that's just the authority."
Well the kingdom of God, Romans 14 says it's not meat nor drink,
but righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.
So the kingdom is in the Holy Spirit. Righteousness is right standing with God.
And if God be for me who really cares who's agains me?
People are like, "Why aren't you afraid?" No! There's no fear in love, the perfect love
of God casts out all fear! I know that I am loved by my Father!
So what can you do to me? How could you take away what you never gave
me? Oh this is amazing!
The whole Bible talks about the same thing, it's pretty awesome!
Are you ok? What is it like to be posessed by God?
This! I'm not here to please you, I love you!
I'm here to please my Father. I have a reverence and a godly fear.
I have a godly fear, a godly fear is heathy. The fear of the Lord is healthy, its the beginning
of wisdom. It's amazing.
Do I need that? I do.
Can you turn the base up? Base, we need base, base, base, base, more
base. There we go.
"beatboxing...." "More beatboxing"
Some of you are like "What is going on?!" Hey, how about some old school?
"Some more beatboxing." No, how about something that's never been
done before? Freedom!!!
He's so fun! I'm not doing good.
I mean I am but I don't even know where I'm going,
but we're going somewhere and it's going to be amazing when we get there.
It' is. Ok, back to the Jewish guy.
The Holy Spirit is really good to me, you don't know.
He really is. So I'm telling this guy about my kid, about
my baby, about this boy. And he's like, "That kid over there?"
I said, "Yeah, he's amazing, his name is Azariah." "What's that?"
"Well there was these 3 guys in a furnace, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, ok?"
I said, "It's in the....Jewish people know about it."
So I'm sharing with him about the fire, he's like, "Woah."
I said, "Yeah and then they went into the fire,"
They're like, "look what your fire does king!" He's like, "What happened?"
"Well then there was annother person in the fire,
His name was Jesus" "Ok."
"Well Abednego's origional name was Azariah, that's why his name is Azahriah."
"Ah cool" I said, "look dude, I love you so much, I
just want to talk to you about this." He's like, "Ok"
"Let me pray for you first." He goes, "Ok."
I said, "Can I just have your hand?" He goes, "Sure"
It was awesome. I said, "Jesus, he doesn't even believe you're
real. I just ask you to show him from the top of
his head to the bottom of his feet. Father thank you so much, Jesus you're awesome!"
"God thank you for his foot being healed, I thank you for his back being healed.
Thank you that you take that one disk in his back that gives him scyatic pain down his
right side right now that you'd heal it in Jesus's name.
Jesus's name, God thank you." He does like this, I said, "What's happening?"
He goes "Dude my whole body is vibrating, what's going on?"
I said, "It's the one you don't believe in, he lives with me, he likes me."
And I'm talking to him and I'm like, "Dude, Jesus loves you so much Man!"
He goes, "What's going on right now?" "You want it to stop?"
He's like, "I don't know." I go, "Check your foot."
He's like, "There's fire in my foot." I go, "Cool. Move it around."
He goes, "I don't want to." I said, "Just try."
He's like, "Ok." "Oh my gosh, what's going on?"
"Jesus!" "Oh!" "I need to go to sleep"
"Ok, I love you." "I"ll be here when you get done."
"We've got 3 more hours." Oh what do you do with me?
It's too late dude, I'm gone, I'm gone. Jesus said, "I am the resurection and life,
he who believe's in me will never die." Do you understand, that I'm never going to
die? Here's what it means, people are like; "Well
are you trying to preach some kind of weird stuff?"
No, one day I'm going to put this tent off, but I'm going to go straight to be with Him.
You see this is so important, because to live is Christ's and to die is gain.
I'm not afraid of death. I'm not preaching this so that someone kills
me. Dude, I love God, I'm not afraid, I'm going
to be with him. I'm with him now but I get to be with him
even more then. And everywhere I just want to share his love.
And everywhere I go I just want to touch people. I just want to be a better witness. God make
me a better witness! Make me a better witness! Please!
Woke up this morning, God make me a better witness so I can, so that I can represent
your name well. So that I can raise a generation God, not
a rais like come up over, but come up underneath. A generation of people,
Phillipians 2 says to consider others greater than yourself,
it doesn't say consider yourself great. It says he who considers himself something
is nothing. It's not about that
It's about reigning in righteousness, It's aobut right standing with God
It's about living in a place where you believe you've been forgivin.
God forgave you for, forgot it, he won't remember it again.
He wants to give you his holyness. He wants us to be holy, as he is holy.
But he wants us to walk in power, he wants us to walk in holiness, purity
and power. It says persue peace and holiness, for without
which, without that nobody will see the Lord.
I'm not persuing power at the cost of character. I want righteousness, it helps to produce
amazing Godlike character. Trials are the only thing that help us get
to that place. People are like; "I like to be complete."
Well if you want to be perfect and complete, then let patience have it's perfect work in
you, that you may be perfect and complete, laking
nothing. But patience doesnt come just because you
want it, patience comes through the fire,
patience comes throught the tial, because trials produce patience,
produces character, which leads to hope, and hope doesn't dissabpoint.
If you want to be perfect and complete, then don't be afraid of trials.
But my God, know who you are when you are in the fire!
You know that if you put someone on that's on fire in the fire,
nothing changes. If you put someone that's genuinly on fire
for the Lord, and a passion for his name,
and you put them in a fire, nothing changes. I come out of that fire, with a cristper,
sharper, more awareness of his presence, his goodness, his mercy, his grace.
But grace is not a license to sin, Grace is the ability to live godly.
Like well no man I'm under grace, chill out" What are you doing?
Do you think that Jesus tried to sin and get away with it?
NO! He bore the tree, he went to the tree because
he say you, and you were the joy set before him, so he
persued the cross. He saw you and was like " just for that one,
I'm going" Just for that one.
Oh my God, just for me, just for you. So this Jewish guy wakes up and he goes
"You know, nobody has really showed this Jesus with me?"
I go " Can I share some more, Man, because I'm just getting started, please?"
He goes, " I guess" So I shared it, I did like Stephen did, like
with the Pharisse, and the Readers Digest version of the gospel
all the way through. He's like "Wow, you gave me a lot to think
about" We get to the end of the flight,
I go, "Well don't think about it too long bro, because youn don't know what your tomorrow
could be." He goes......
"That's pressure" No that's not pressure I don't want him to
parish. He goes, he didn't say "That's pressure."
He goes, "Thanks man, I don't know what this is, I feel like this urgency inside me."
I siad " Good, that's called Jesus, man, he's wooing your heart, man"
I said "Don't think about this too long, becasue it's not that you get faith because you understand
it first, it's you have faith and understanding comes
after faith comes. This isn't logic man"
I said, "Can you logically understand what happened to me,
He goes, "No dude that's crazy." I go, "Right, the gospels not meant for your
brain, the gospel is meant for your heart, because your heart can take you where your
brain could never even squeeze through." He looks at me and he goes, "Thanks a lot
man." I go, "Can I pray for you one more time?"
He goes, "Go right ahead." I said, "God don't let him sleep, until he
surrenders to Jesus." He looks at me and he goes, "What did you
just do?" I go, "Awe, nothing."
He goes, "It's realy nice to meet you today dude."
It was good, there was more, but Ok. Oh my, not good, time.
Ok, you ready? I'm going to preach now, bear with me.
"I don't know what's going on with that dude up there, he's gone."
I am! Ok, Titus,
Titus is a really good book. We should read Jude,
Jude is a really good book. I love reading this stuff that's really intense
man. I mean I do.
Ok, you ready? Is everybody ok?
Ok Ok I'm going to read about grace real quick,
your ready? I was talking about it a little bit, but I
want to. So Titus 2,
"For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all men,
instructing..." And that word for instruction is the same
one as dicipline. "Diciplining us..."
People talk about chastisement of the Lord, and it actually is reffered to as insturction,
it's instruction. So, "Instruciting us to deny ungodlyness and
worldly desires, and to live sensably, righteously, and godly
in this present age. Looking for the blessed hope and the appearing
of our great God and savio,' Jesus Christ. Who gave himself, who gave himself for us,
to readeam us from every lawless deed. And to purify for himself a people for his
own posession." Oh, that's so amazing!
It says "The grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all men.
Instruction us to deny ungolyness. And worldly desires and to live sesably, rightesousy
and godly in the present age, looking for the blessed hope and the appearing
of our God and saviour, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to readeam us from
every lawless deed, and to purify for himself a people for his
own posession, zealous for good works or good deeds.
These things speak and exhort and reprove with all athority,
let no one disregard you." Ok ready?
I'm just going to share a little bit, and man, Ok.
I need grace. "Remind them to be subject to rulers and authority,
and to be obidient, to be ready for every good deed.
To be peaceful, to be gentle, showing every consideration for all men.
For we also were foolish ourselves, disobedient, decieved ,
enslaved to various lusts and desires and pleasures.
Spending our life in malice and envy. Hateful, and hating one another. But when
the kindness, the Goodness of God our Saviour, and His
love for mankind appeared, He saved us. Not on the basis of our deeds,
what we have done in righteousenss, but according to His mercy, by the washing
of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit."
WOW! So Good! So Amazing!
Jesus wants to purify Himself, Us..His Bride. He wants us to be blameess and spotless.
He wants us to believe we are who He says we are.
He wants us to have and encounter with the Goodness of Him.
The Goodness of God. You know, I'm just gonna share and backtrack
a tiny bit. I'm gonna share a testimony and we're gonna
pray. You guys OK?
I love testimonies, they're so good. This one's not exactly like the one I just
shared. But it's good. It's really good.
So, when I came out of the 22 years of addiction and atheism and anger.
Hatred and all this stuff. I was with my girlfriend for nine years. I
destroyed her life. I destroyed my daughter of seven and a half
years. Just, I didn't know who I was.
You know, for those years, about the first couple months we were together,
she was gonna leave me, I was suicidal, I wanted to be done with my life.
And then she was gonna find somebody else. So I really believed with everything in me,
that if I found her with somebody, I would take her out.
I would take him out. And I would take myself out.
And leave my daughter with nobody. That's how I believed in the world,
That's just how I lived. So for seven and a half years she stayed with
me. And for the last few years we were together,
I was in a band. I was a singer, in a hardcore band, like I
could sing that way, but you wouldn't be impressed.
Some of you would. But I'd have to sing good lyrics.
I didn't not sing good lyrics. But hatred, anger, all that stuff.
So these guys were like my best friends.Man. We were party hounds,all of us.
We used to party, drink. All that stuff. And so, one day I came home and my girl was
gone, and she had left, and she took my daughter.
And I told her that if she left I was done. And so what I did was I went to her stepdad's
hourse, because I knew he had guns.
And I went to get a gun, and I was going to blow my brains out.
I wasn't going to take her out because I knew she didn't leave me for another man.
I knew it was me, I was the issue. So I went there, and on the way to a gun cabnient
I passed by a phone book, and I flipped this phone book open.
And it opened to churches, and it was the last thing that I'm looking for,
Becasue I hated Christians dude, because they were all hypocrites.
I hated everybody equally, so it wasn't just Christians.
So I made a check at one of these 580 churches in my home town,
and I drove to this church, angry as can be. And I get there and this real happy guy comes
to the door. And I said "I need to talk to somebody."
He goes, "Come on in, buddy!" He's all happy, I'm like "What's wrong with
you man?!" He goes, "It's not what's wrong with me, it's
what's been made right." I'm like, "Come on, man, Shut up!"
He said, "Ok." I go, "I need to talk to somebody now!"
So we went up stairs. He tells me, all happy, just so full of joy,
" What's wrong with you?" He said, "It's not what's wrong with me, it's
what's been made right." I was freaking out like, "Stop!"
Becaue I was angry, had never seen real joy, and this was real.
Joy makes other people angry. So he tells me, he goes, "You know what?"
I told him all my junk, he goes, "Since you don't want your life,
why don't you give it to somebody who does?" And I said "Dude, who would want my life,
did you just hear what I just did, all the stuff,
I just came from a gun cabnient, man." He goes, "But you didn't shoot yourself, why
do you think that is?" I go, "I don't know, and I don't know why
I'm here talking to you, this is stupid." He goes, "Let me tell you about Jesus."
"I didn't come here to hear about Jesus!" He goes, "This is a church."
But in my life I had no grid that Jesus is at a church because no one talked to me about
Jesus, from the church. I said, "How could some dead guy form 2000
years ago want my life? It doesn't make any sense man.
He siad, "That's just it, it won't make any sense."
And then he started to talk to me, and I said, "Whatever dude, if he wants my life he can
have it, there." He's like, "Amen."
I'm like, "What is that?!" He said, "Here's my number."
I said, "I don't want your number." He goes, "You're goning to need it."
I said, "I don't need anybody, dude." So I put it in my pocket and I left,
I went home and I called my daughter because I needed to tell her that Daddy found God.
I said "Hey" She goes " Mommy's never coming home Daddy."
She's seven and a half. I go " Well you need to tell Mommy that Daddy
found God." She goes, "What's he like Dad?"
I go, "I don't know, but I met somebody that does, and he's amazing.
You've got to meet this guy, there's just something in his eyes."
I didn't undertand that it was the lamp of his body.
The eye is the lamp of your body, if the lamp of your body,
If your eye is single, focused on one thing, your whole body will be full of light,
and that's what I saw. And so she's like, "Mommy's never coming home."
I said, "You do whatever you have to do to get Mommy home."
So she kicked and screamed and got Mommy to come home.
Mommy comes in, not a Christian. She goes, "Now you're goning to be a hypocrite."
"No, no, no! Everything's going to change. I met this guy and like he was telling me
aobut htis Jesus!" "Jesus? Shut up!"
And like it was just intense, really not good. I'm like, "No, everything is going to change."
I my daughter to bed and I told her, I said, "Daddy found God, Honey, this is awesome."
"Daddy I'm so glad you found God, now you're not going to do those bad things anymore,"
I go, "Yep." Hour and a half later, after she's in bed,
I'm out on a coke binge, first night. Now I get back in the morning and they're
waiting on the couch, it's horrible, it's not good.
Second night, same thing, and I call that pastor,
"It didn't work, It didn't work dude! Your Jesus didn't work!"
He said "Todd how do you feel about what you did?"
I said, "Horrible!" He said, "Thank God!"
I said, "Thank God for what?" He said, "Thank God you feel horrible. A couple
days ago you wouldn't have even cared." I'm like, "Make it grow faster!"
So then the guys come over for band practice, I'm like, "Dudes, guess what?"
They're like "What?" I'm like, "I found Jesus, bro."
They're like, "What?!" I'm like, " Yeah he's like amazing, he lives
in this guy, man. It's so awesome! I found God bro."
They're like, "Shut up, man." And this is what happened,
I'm like "Here, smoke this, hand me a joint." Smoking a joint, getting high with my friends.
"I'm telling you Jesus is real, bro, he's real! He's amazing!"
Drinking, partying, I don't even have a clue. I'm lost still, even though I'm found.
Scarry, man. And I had no idea.
So we party, by the end of that night, they're like,
"Don't even say that name again." I'm like, "Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus."
Because I don't care, like I'm bold anyways. I'm like, "Whatever."
So 3 of the guys left, they quit the band, left that night.
They're like, "We're out." We had a good band, we were planning on getting
signed. We were together for years.
But one guy, he stayed with me, he was my best friend in the world,
his name was Bobby, best friend ever! He was like,
"Dude, I don't believe in this Jesus, but I believe in you bro,
like you're amazing, it's waht you can do, This is awesome, man."
I'm like, "This is awesome bro, this is cool, let's smoke another one."
Serious, first night. So next time he comes over, I'm upstairs with
my girl friend. I cocm in and she's scraming at me about something.
I come back in my bedroom and I punch a hole in the closet door.
And I'm bleeding. I'm like, "Man!"
And Bobby's down stairs, the basement is my band room.
I wash cleaned my hand, walked down the back steps,
went down there, and I said, "Hey bro, Jesus loves you!"
He just heard me upstairs, he heard everything. He goes, "Dude, you need to stop man, come
on. It's ok, let's just smoke this." We get high, we pary, "I'm telling you man,
Jesus is real!" "Dude, look, nothing has change man, there's
nothing different about your life." I'm like, "I'm telling you man, you've got
to meet this guy bro, he's amazing, he's awesome!" He's like, "I don't want to meet some guy."
And he didn't, and he wouln't want to meet him.
And so month after month after month went by, we partied together,
I'm living as the biggest hypocrit on the pannet.
I have no idea what grace means. No idea, and thank God I didn't get ahold
of it and say 'I'm under grace.'" But Dan kept on pouring the truth into me,
telling me who God said I was. So finally 5 and a half months later after
many band practices and many witnessings with my friend.
I go out one night in this drug deal, and pick up this kid from NYC, Because we
lived up in Pennslvania. And the dealers were down in my city.
And I picked up this kid and I told him I was a cop after I had a bunch of cocain in
my hand. I said, "Get out of the car and put your hands
on the hood." And he said,"I knew you were a cop!"
He sarts freaking out. I said, "Get out of the car."
He gets out of the car and as soon as he stepped out,
I hit the gas. And he pulled out a 9mm, "Boom, Boom, Boom!"
Unloaded the gun. And I heard a voice, "I took those bullets
for you, are you ready to live for me yet?" You think, "Wow, that's an amazing testimony."
No, it gets worse. I went out and I smoked all the cocain I got.
And every hit I took, my buzz, I couln't catch a buzz.
It was crazy, I pulled in the morning, I get out of my Jeep.
I looked at my car and I had no bultet holes in my car, from 10 feet away.
And this fear is in me. I went up to the door, she said "Get out of
my life, I hate you!" And then I called my friend ,my guitar player,
and I said, "Dude, I'm going to go away to a rehab, man,
I just got shot at." He goes, "Are you in the hospital."
I go, "But the dude unloaded a 9mm." He goes, "Oh man, the guy was a bad shot."
I said, "No, you don't understand, he was 10 feet away from me."
And Bobby goes, "Man, well I'll be here when you get back."
I said, "Dude, this rehab is a year long." He goes, "No! Why would you go away for a
year?!" I said, "Becasue it's not the regular rehab,
it's about Jesus." He goes, "Why would you go away to learn about
somebody that not rea?!" I go, "He is real, Man!"
He goes, " No he's not, look at your life! If he was real, don't you think there would
be change? All you have is a name, just life everybody
else who calls themselves a Christian. All you have is a name, but there is no difference!"
I go, "No he's real!" "No he's not, I believe in you, I don't believe
in this Jesus." I said, "Well I've got to go away, can we
get togeth?" He said, "No."
I said, "Man, I'm leaving in 2 days, I can't call you or talk to you or nothing."
He goes, " That's alrigh man, you go and find out for your self, he's not real. I'll be
here when you get back." And so 2 days later I drove up to Teen Challenge.
Went up there, lost my girl, my daughter, lost everything.
I went up to Teen Challenge, Man. Shaved my head balled.
I was like, because I had dreads before in rebellion.
It looks like it, but it's not now. I go up there, and I'm in Teen Challenge,
and the 3rd day that I'm there, I get this phone call, and they call me in the office.
And I go in there, and even though I lost my girl,
I didn't waant anything to happen, I owed so many drug dealers so much money.
And I went in there, and they go, "Hey you need to sit down, your pastor is
on the phone." And they had that look on their face like
something's really wrong. I go, "No, what happened? Tell me."
And I get on the phone and it's that pastor. I go, "Hey man, please tell me nothing happened
to Jackie, nothing happened to Desitny?" He goes, "It's not your girl, it's not your
daughter, they're ok." I go, "Man, whew, I was really scared ther
for a second." He goes, "It's Bobby."
I go, "What's wrong with Bobby?" He said, " 2 days ago, Bobby had a brain annurism."
I go, "What's that? He siad, "He's in a comma."
I go, "What do you mean?" He goes, "The doctors don't know if he's going
to make it through the night." I go, "No, No! He's my best friend!"
I threw the phone and I ran up stairs and I went in the prayer room.
And for the first time in my life, peace hit me and knocked me to the floor.
And God said, "You're not going anywhere." And I'm like, "God, No! He's my only friend!"
"God, he's my only friend!" And I didn't leave, and I stayed there, and
I was there for 2 months. And 2 months later, I had these 3 night where
I had encounter with Jesus, but first I had an encounter with the truth.
Jesus, is the truth, but the truth started to open up to me,
and the realith of who Jesus called me to be.
And 2 months later I have these 3 nights where I have these encounters with him.
And he tells me to go home and restore my friends and family.
And I wake up in the morning after this dream. and I called that pastor.
I said, "Dude, I need you to come and get me."
He said, "Todd is this God?" I said, " I met Jesus last night."
He comes up to Teen Challenge and picks me up 10 months early.
And I quit everything in my life, but I really met him.
Like he really changed me, and get in the car, and I'm so thankful for
who God has created me to be. And when we get home,
I said, "I need to go to the house." I know that I can't live there, but I know
that I need to say I'm sorry to Destiny, my daughter.
Because I hurt her. Becaue for severn and a half years I lived
as the worst Dad ever, and I realized that God is my Dad, and he
loves me. And I'm so excited about who he is and I need
to tell her about my Dad. And I get to the porch and she comes running
out, and she holds me and I'm telling her how sorry
I am, and how much God loves her.
She's like, "Daddy, I"m just so glad you're home."
I'm like, "Honey, Daddy's not home, I can't stay here."
I can't jsut move back in, it's not the way it works.
So I'm in love with God and it's so amazing. And I'm holding my kid and just for the first
time, hold my baby. And then my girl comes out and I said,
" I am so sorry for all the junk that I did, all the stuff and
I'm going to provide for her, and be a Dad. And I've found that I'm going to do my job
as unto the Lord. I'm going to work and provide.
She goes, "I know you will." I go, "What do you mean, how do you know I
will?" She says, "When you were away I gave my life
to Jesus." And I went, "Oh my God!"
And I go "I can't live here." She goes, "No, no, no, you can't live here,
we need to get married." And I go, "Ahhh!"
And I looked at the pastor and I go, "Dude, we need to plan this!"
He goes, "You're not planning anything." I go " What do you mean?"
He goes, "Look, it's not abut your plans, it's about your love and about your commitment
and your covinent. I know she loves you because I've been pouring
into her when you were gone. We'll do it on Sunday in between 1st and 2nd
service." It's not like everybody is going to come,
"Hey come out to my wedding!" Nobody's going to come.
But right threre this conviction hit my heart, I'm like,
"Oh my gosh" and all of a sudden my heart satrted pounding.
See it says this, it says in Romans 5, it says righteouness,
It says instruction in righteousness, trians your senses.
It says that solid meat is for the mature, who have their sense trained to decern between
good and evil. And right now my heart is telling me that
my whole house is full of junk. And even though I'm not going to live there
right now, I need to go inside and clean house.
Because I can't stand my little 7 and a half kid finding the pornagraphy and all the stuff
I have in there. And it's wiked.
It's not because I have to remove it because it because I might be tempted to use it.
I have to remove it because I can't stand it to be in my house, because this vessle
is clean. And I got to get rid of it.
Like this urgency inside. So I said, "Hey, can you watch my daughter,
and check? I'm going in the house to clean."
She goes, "Ok." So I went in with a trash bag, and my heart's
pouning. And God's eye's are on me, because God sits
in the theatre room of the sould of your mind. And he sees everything that goes across your
screen. And it wasn't because I had to, it was because
I have to. I have to get rid of it.
So I went through and swept my house, all the pornagraphy, all the junk.
All the twisted stuff, the stuff that used to rule my life.
Used to rule my life! I used to think that the gilr was who made
me a man. That's not who makes you a man!
It's God that makes you a man." And so I get rid of all my stuff and I take
it down the back steps of our trialer that we lived in.
And I went down to the burn barrle, and I took all my junk in a big garbage bad.
And I put it in the burn barrle. And I went and got a sledge hammer.
And I sledged that thing to the ground. And I went to the grage, and I got the gasoline.
And I doused that thing. No one is looking at me.
My girl's not looking at me saying "Good job!" My daughter's not looking at me saying " Wow,
great, Dad!" Pastor's not looking at me saying "I'm proud
of you." God's looking at me saying, "Get rid of it."
And I'm convicted, it's called Godly fear. And I burned it.
I put a trail and I lit it and it blew up. And I went to the barrel after it was down,
and I worshipped Jesus over my past. That thing enslaved me, that sin that made
me a slave to it. "I'm no longer a slave..." to sin.
"to fear, because I am a child of God." "I'm no longer a slave to fear, because I
am a child of God." "From my mother's womb..."
Ohh "...you have chosen me, love has called my
name." " I've been born again, into a family, you're
blod flows through my vains!" I'm no longer a slave, done!
Worrship Jesus over my past, and that thing's been cut off.
The next day I get a phone call. "Go up and visit Bobby."
I go and we visit Bobby, my best friend. And went into this convelecent home, and here
he is in a comma. I went up to him and I told his wife, "I am
so sorry." She said, "For what?"
I said, "Because of Jesus." She goes, "Jesus? Really?
Look at my husband and you're going to tell me about Jesus?!"
I said, "He's real." She goes, "Don't tell me he's real!"
"He is." She went in the corner and held her ears.
And I looked into my best friend's in the world's eyes,
and he's gone. And I said, "Dude, Jesus is real."
And for 30 seconds, all the junk, 'Hey Jesus is real, he loves you, man."
All that stuff passed in front of me for 30 seconds,
it was like condemnation galore. And then God lifted it.
And I said, "Dude, I'm so sorry, Man. Jesus is real, man. He's real1"
And we left and my daughter was with me. And the next morning he died.
And them they called me and they said "Hey" His wife said " You were Bobby's only friend."
"And he would want you to speak at his funeral." And I went "Oh my God."
and I helped my wife. I was up night.
God spoke to me, he said, "I want you to talk about what it means to be a friend."
I said, "A friend, a friend lays his life down for his friend."
So I get there and Bobby is in the casket, his body.
And I'm looking at his 3 and a half year old kid, and his 7 and a half year old kid on
the front row. I'm looking at these kids, I watched this
little 3 and a half year old girl come up and shake the casket and say,
"Daddy, wake up!" I'm not condemed.
I am seared in my heart. I'm branded, in my heart,
becaue I had to tell those little kids at Bobby's funeral,
that there's only one name, . '... and your daddy told me he believed in
me, not in Jesus. And there's only one name under heaven,
that men can be save. And your Daddy didn't believe in Jesus."
That's what I had to tell those little kids. That's the hardest thing ever.
But it marked me and seared me from ever living as a hypocrite.
Grace isn't a license to sin. This isn't a mean message.
Look, here's the deal, I need the worship team.
Here's the truth, I want you guys to walk in power.
I want you guys to walk in the most amazing power ever.
But I want us to walk with the reverential fear.
Where the fear of the Lord is the foundation of our life.
Not because we are afaid we might get in trouble. No, God sees it all, he sees everything, he
sees it all. He loves you.
Listen, if hypocrisy has been in your life, I need you up here,
right now. Come right now, if this thing right here is
shaking your heart. There's another ministy thing back there,
a blue carpet back there and up here, I need you right now.
Just come. God loves you, this message isn't because
you guys are bad people, I love you, I'm part of the bride.
I am part of the body of Christ. But I just want us to get,
Let's just get reverent with God, Ok? Right now let us just come up and kneel.
You don't even need to come up and stand, Let's just love Jesus, Ok?
Let's just, right now, lets just put our heart before God,
and ask us to mark us with a Godly fear. Just a Godly fear, a reverential Godly fear.
A micraphone to me, is never a chane to voice my opinion.
I want us to all live in such a way, where there's no Bobby's in your life, Ok?
There doesn't need to be a Bobby in your life. I love you with all my heart.
but I want us to burn with such a fire, I want us to be baptized with such a desire
to represent God's name. I love Jesus with all my heart!
Let us worship Jesus" Let us worship you, Lord!"
Let us worship Jesus, with everything we are.
Let us worship Jesus. Let us praise him with our life.
Let us worship Jesus, with all we are. Let us represent your name,
to a lost and dying world. Let us represnt your name,
to a lost and dying world. Let us represent your name,
to a lost and dying world. Name of Jesus, lifted hight.
The name of Jesus, lifted high. Father I thank you in the name of Jesus, God,
for every person here that's making a comittment, to submitt to Godly reverence.
To a Godly fear, to the fear of the Lord taht's the beginning of wisdom.
God I ask you for a fire to baptize your bride. And a flame of heaven, would completely overwhelm
us. I want everybody here, to be able to walk
supernatually natural. I want everybody here to be walking in the
power of God. The power of God isn't the only reason we're
on the earth. I want everybody to be able to stand before
God, and him say, "Well done. Enter in. Well done."
The Bible says that not everybody that says to me "Lord, Lord."
It says "Didn't we prophesy, didn't we heal, didn't we do this?'
I want everybody to enter in! I want us to submit to Godly fear, that we
can get the spirit of ugly off of the bride. That people would see the church and say 'Oh
my gosh, there's Jesus!" God I ask you to mark us, just sear us.
Just brand us with Godlyness. God that grace teaches us, to deny, to deny
ungodlyness. Grace teaches us, God we are not going to
be led around with lusts form this world. We are not going to be led.
We are not going to be led by pornagraphy. We are not going to be led by drugs.
We are not going to be led by addiciton! I curse pornagraphy! I command that thing
to be broken right now off your life. Jesus, I thank you that right now, we are
bringing stuff to a burn barrel right now.
We are saying, 'No more!' We are not going to be splayed to drugs,
slaves to pronagraphy, slaves to sexual immorality, no more!
Sleeping with my girlfriend doesn't make me a man.
Sleeping with your boyfriend doesn't make you a man.
God makes you a man. God makes you a woman!
God thank you that you would raise up a blameless generation.
That is on fire, with your name. The glory of God, sweep through.
Sweep through, God. Jesus I thank you, for every person like Bobby,
the person's life here. God I ask you to wipe away all the stuff.
I thank you for evey family member, in Jesus's name,
that you'd wipe away all the hypocricy. Jesus, clean your bride.
God, enable us to be a people that seek your face.
Enable us to be a people, that digest your word.
Holy Spirit, I'm asking you to overwhelm everyone here,
with your goodness and your mercy. Jesus!
No more hypocricy! God we make a commmitment to you,
we say Jesus, that you culled out lips. We want to be the remnant,
we want to be the remnant! A Godly generation that stands forth to purity,
righteousness, passion for your name. The power of God everywhere we go,
Let us be conduits for the power of God, everywhere we go!
Let the prophetic to cecome active in every believer here.
Let word of knowledge become active, let healing break out.
Jesus! Jesus!
Jesus Jesus
I want everybody to yell "Freedom" on the count of 3,
On the count of 3. Ready? One, two, three!
Again! Freedom!
Again! Freedom!
Again! Again!
Come on, stand to your feet, stand to your feet,
I want you to yell freedom again! Freedom!
One more time. Just the voices,
just the voices, on the count of 3 I want everybody to yell freedom.
One, two, three. Put your hand on somebody right now,
watch this, watch what happens right now.
We're going to pray for healing right now. Yay, because God's really good with it.
Are you ready? Here's what I want you to say.
Everybody, the person on your left and right, I just want you to say, "In the name of Jesus..."
"I command healing.." "In everybody here..."
"Right now..." "In Jesus's name."
"From the top of our head..." "...to the bottom of our feet..."
"...complete wholeness..." "And 100% healing."
"Every disease," "Get out"
"Head be healed," "Neck be healed,"
"Shoulders be healed," "Back be healed,"
"Heart be healed," "Lungs be healed,"
"Organs, be heaed," "Hips, be healed,"
We're just working our way down, it's easy.
Becaue if you learn this, all your doing is just speaking them out.
So when you're praying for somebody's neck, that's easy,
'Neck, be healed." "Knees, be healed."
"Ancles, be healed." "Toes, be healed."
Ready? "Metal, get out."
"Jesus name!" "Every joint be loosed."
"Right now." "In Jesus's name."
"Digestive diseases, get out!" "Right now."
"Ears, open." "Eyes, see."
"Blood stream, be healed." "Jesus's name"
Ok now I want everybody to check your body all over the house.
Everywhere, right now. Of anything and everything you were dealing
with in any way. Just check, all over,
shoulders, necks, backs, knees, everything. This is really easy.
If there's there's change, if there's change in you phisical body, right
now, I want you to riase both hands ober your head.
Look around. I want everybody to look around right now.
Can we get a crowd shot. If there's change in your body,
wave both hands over your head. Just be really happy.
This is really not technical. It's the simplicity of the gospel.
Ok, now put your hand on somebody again. Yay.
Oh it's so exciting. Ok, somebody yelled out addictions,
so just, Jesus we just curse addiction.
And we thank you that you would make us completele addicted to Jesus.
That's the problem, we're meant, we're created to be addicted to Jesus.
So just say this, "God," "Make us completely addicted,"
"To Jesus." "Becaue we cannot overdose..."
"...On the Holy Ghost." "We cannot overdose,
on the Holy Ghost." "Holy Spirt..."
"...we ask you for more." "Right now."
God let your presence right now, just come. Right now, even more, right now.
Jesus, more! Increase.
I feel like I'm to pray, for just a fresh baptism of fire.
Just, but I cannot come out and touch, So here's what's going to happen,
we're just going to ask God to do it, becaue he's really good at it, Ok?
So would you do me a favor, we're just going to lift up worship.
So for the next 10 minutes we're going to worship Jesus,
we're going to ask him to baptize us with fire,
right now. Are you ready?
So I don't want anybody of you to look at me,
I want everybody, to worship Jesus.
Becasue I'm telling you right now, that when this thing happened to me,
I was in a service, and I was just sitting there,
and I kept asking God, "What is the baptism of fire, what is that?"
And a man said like "You, you've been asking the Lord for a baptism of fire."
Bill was in the room. It was the scariest thing ever.
And that thing hit me and crushed me in an amazing way.
So would you guys do me a favor? And just ask the Lord to baptize you with
a fresh fire upon your life. You guys.
So lets worship and just cry our for God's fire, right now.
You guys, you and God, right now. Do it Jesus.
"Signing...."
