This is what Harry Potter would look like if an idiot was in control

hey there friends how's it going today we'll be putting the dumb in dumbledore because i'm opening up my own magic school i don't know what the chaos challenge is but it seems fitting i'm putting that on i'm ready university name uh real good and nice magic school and the irish colors and all it just looks awful all right after the lord of evil's last attack he died the previous headmaster i like how the right to the point lord of evil no voldemort [ __ ] you know no riddles here right to the point play this card to create a new house okay house name hero house this is basically gryffindor by the way i'm giving them plot armor immediately they're popular and hard workers and then they'll need a rival house shitty evil feckers just being right up front with everyone no i like that just a sad student that's a good sign of things to come comical their presence reduces boredom for all other students god they're getting screwed all right five new students i don't even have i'm back in school yet okay this person is ugly so they're going the shitty evil defectors this person's beautiful and gourmet you're going in hero house a bully and shifty shitty evil fecker diligent hero house death oh i gotta be careful here i could open myself up to a lawsuit all right you're in the hero house let's get a dormitory oh so you build it like that that is actually really cool students hall will build upwards oh god i think i should get an engineer and i will just say it's held up by magic and then when it collapses we'll deal with the fallout choose one the two applicants for the position of astronomy teacher okay this one has ancient wisdom but this one is fun i'm going with you yeah i definitely should have got an engineer in here oh the king sends his regards how great so very great and would i very much like to help but i am a fair and generous king what would you need help from the royal architects that is very fitting or will i just give money you know what just give me cash who cares about regulations hi there we're from around here we don't like trouble and we're not fond of strangers what are you doing here exactly do not worry for our school mainly trains mages specialized in necromancy and summoning of powerful demons oh we got a cowards trying to apply welcome to shitty evil feckers allergic to pollen oh i see so you're weak you're going to [ __ ] evil peckers i'm like the worst safe ever out of anyone i know and i'm like yeah weakling you go to the back of the line oh wait i'm getting the choice between three things okay demonic chamber or a hat that's kind of an easy choice to be honest i think the demonic chamber should go at the front the demonology teacher okay relaxed chatty inspiring researcher this one's clumsy and slow that's an easy choice okay so i want to draw some cards here i think so i can draw a demon card yeah give me give me a demon card a necro staff when a student is at least level two in necromancy they receive an echo staff made from a dead student's skull but we just opened how did someone die already yeah well they were probably a shitty evil fecker let's see head teacher's office can i adjust the rules of the school i can okay strict discipline that's why the demonic chamber's there now organize a yearly contest between houses yes go hero house a shadow room allows students to improve their assassination okay yeah i'm going with that i don't think i'm making good choices here increases their own salary by 100 you are a [ __ ] lunatic wait i can change your name greedy gabby is your new name oh god i didn't mean to actually hire you i just wanted to change your name also you know earlier when they offered me architect support i think i should have taken it because i've blocked the astronomy tower on both sides but we got some things coming up here wait what is this what communication available why why does it show a hamster i'm gonna talk to the local cemetery for some reason yeah i'll contact that faction wait oh this is the lord of evil oh sorry my lord i'm gonna compliment his dragon just be nice to the dude maybe if someone just made some nice small talk with voldemort he wouldn't have been so bad that's all i'm saying let's get me some more cards what do we got here another dormitory might be a good idea or maybe a teacher's room yeah you know what i'll take care of the teachers except for the astronomy one i'm kind of pissing him off i imagine with these towers they just keep going up and i have so much land that i could build on i'm gonna change the priorities to shadow magic i don't even know what it is but it just sounds cool oh i can zoom way in oh jesus i can really see the disappointment on the students faces going this close oh look at this class though yes children talk to the lord of evil okay now i think they're just using the death thing as a sure thing pass to get to hero house because i don't want to get sued oh here we go we got harry potter himself he's just ambitious no negatives harry potter there you go you're in hero house wait this person is [ __ ] chosen by the light oh wait no that's bad you're going to the bad class i forgot i'm doing shadow and magic which honestly you think life might help given you know you need light for shadow shadow disciple there we go that's what we want right now the only subjects we're teaching are like demonic magic and astronomy and the astronomy tower is blocked by poor planning all right give me a card what do we got a prison oh yes i'm gonna contact the lord of evil again i'm just gonna compliment this dragon again hopefully he forgot the last time i don't want to keep repeating the same chat apply no no they're complaining about their conditions they want a special box that makes great coffee 120 gold no i refuse coffee's bad for your health i'm doing this for you yeah very convincing i don't think i have enough beds for the amount of students i have you know and plus it's in like a hallway to the upper floors it's awful killed the demon lord and found his cat he's without an owner oh but it'll cost me money i don't know if i should spend a quarter of the school's money on a cat you [ __ ] it i'll take the cat wait oh there's vampires now yeah you can all go on the shitty evil feckers sorry i don't know why i don't care about discriminating against you okay the school is getting very top-heavy oh crypt great you can study necromancy let's just build above the astrology tower now you can tell the headmaster just does not care about this subject he's boxing it up now evil banner active characters in this room improve your reputation with the lord of evil yep we'll take that ooh a tentacle that might spruce the place up a little bit let's throw that there there you go they're immediately leaving the room they don't like the tentacle this guy's still happy despite everything good evening students today we will observe the um uh ceiling kind of weird to have the crypt on the top floor as well you know it's good they have a view and all i guess there we go janitor lodge has completely ruined astronomy active characters in this room have a chance of creating alcohol oh yes it would really suit our school symbol you know the irish colors health risk waffle maker yes i hope we can make grilled cheese look i know we do literal magic but this thing's not real magic it cooks them in no time and they taste delicious okay i don't know much about running a school clearly but that seems like a health hazard i don't know if that's a good idea but this is a room for training assassins apparently at least the school has a bit of a shape to it now it's still weird but it's better oh they made alcohol good job students definitely not something you'd want to hear if you sent your kid to the school the headmaster like oh yay underage drinking oh i can get a new house yes i need to split them up a little bit there we go meh students they're just like they're meh you know you take them or leave them i'm taking them because i get money but meh probably won't teach them they don't even get a symbol they're not allowed to learn magic either oh wait they learn shadow magic faster okay you can learn shadow magic you get the plain robes too they're making loads of alcohol these students aren't so bad after all the merchants guild is interested in your new university we might even be willing to support you financially oh yes if you make sure investing in your university is profitable for this your goal will be to collect ten thousand gold pieces yeah i can do that oh people are graduating okay you became a minion oh you were in shitty factor's house okay yeah except that that's no surprise now come on you're a peasant after coming out a hero the house no re-roll you're still a peasant i [ __ ] hate you i only had one re-roll village made yeah there you go wink yes good job in hero house adventure great job in hero house avenger at a shitty factors all right okay and a peasant why are you smiling you went through university to become a peasant wait you're selling dragons how much 125 that's not bad for a dragon black dragon that's got to be unlucky i'm getting it probably a bad omen but whatever orphan and cowards jesus well that's an easy choice allergic to pollen another easy choice you know you're lucky you're a vampire you don't have to go out in the sun you got two valid excuses being a vampire and hay fever oh my god what is this room okay this this is confusing as hell did i design this to be fair it matches my pattern so far when it comes to building so maybe it was an accident and the students just had to figure it out i see hordes of students misbehaving oh i'll order some enchanted shackles then chains all right where'd i put them i guess in the jail cell i have a bit of a problem here in that the hero house isn't getting that many students because while i keep going to the graveyard and recruiting vampires and i'm left with things like this i don't know if it's even a good idea i just figure the more students i have the more money i make in fact let's change the rules so that they have to pay to eat paid dormitories and paid meals there you go your basic human rights come at a cost student all people are immediately leaving they're just like i'll just check out now i can mix some like ingredients no i can't just mix all alcohol damn i thought that might make something cool i'm hanging chains up in the bedrooms but just as a warning like you gotta pay shadows but another facet of light oh they're complaining because of all my shadow man okay i guess it's affecting the land i'll just offer it up to the lord of evil he'll take some off my hands child eating bed uh sure the thing is they have to pay for the dormitories look at that i just slipped it in underneath one of the kids as they were sleeping but they still have to pay for that bed right okay good you know this room reminds me of the [ __ ] harry potter games because sometimes they were just making you do [ __ ] obstacle courses instead of learning magic okay i'm mixing wild chemicals now um it got me demonic distillation can i sell it gain 200 mana i'm just gonna [ __ ] drink it there you go oh no oh i thought i died or something for a second you know i'm getting a lot of gold i actually did quite well with that last batch of students i don't know how they must have just been really smart probably in hero house we need you to make us a fertility potion oh it's for the cows okay i was wondering how it's like i i don't know if you should go to the hospital with that yeah sure why not i'll make an experimental potion let me start mixing up my cheese and alcohol jesus the lord of evil loves me i have full reputation with him have you come to beg for mercy no i thought we were pals i need to get a coffin so i can get this one and i'll draw loads of vampire cards but for now let's just do this half my school are vampires if not more wait what is this good day i'm sure that you were aware that the plans would soon be aligned it's so nice to hear from you lord of evil have you read yourself for the coming of darkness no but i can see that isn't true we've got an observatory i mean we can't see [ __ ] out of it look at him okay so either way my my relationship with him goes down because he's just being unreasonable i'm kind of interested to see how well we can do in a fight so let's fight we've trained our students well oh wait oh wait oh [ __ ] oh they're fighting at the door could we not like set up sandbags or something they're just walking in i think they dealt with them though i think i have far too many students for what i should have because i oh no wait hold on the uh the army of the dead are coming in this side and killing them i'm gonna go to the theater i need to unwind a bit this lord of evil is driving me nuts i need help to spread the word about our university oh that's great he's doing it for free ah you see i'm paying the musician with exposure very clever not a dick move at all i don't know if the students are going to be happy but i put up a poster of the the lord of evil even though he just attacked and killed many students we orcs don't need much and what we need we can take from those weak humans you could give us things directly so we'd have to kill you first i could just craft what they need but i say we [ __ ] fight it'll probably only cost me a few students right oh and we got new students too so we can just feed them to the orcs oh jesus christ they're huge can the teacher hurry up a little bit i feel like you should be the one fighting this battle okay we won just about meeting the king he's extremely busy we could train your son yeah no problem he's gonna give us prestige points for and everything we've royalty in the school even though i know it was free but you think the king would not send his son you know the heir to the throne to a school that just got attacked by orcs willingly now for [ __ ] sake the lord of evil is back can you just [ __ ] off for a while and stop being so evil you're such a cliche all right i'm going to tell them about the observatory that'll make them [ __ ] off for a while my inventory is full of cheese and alcohol and i can't make any potions because i need one more ingredient i'm going to change the rules so that that student house can actually wait what for the hell is it uh hold on i don't really do my job very often so i'm a little bit lost i want to allow them to learn magic yeah here we go because they need to generate some points for me the neglect is affecting me now so it has to stop i'll hire you master of assassins alfred round belly and slow well i'm sorry i just put you up on the top floor so it's gonna take you a while i guess i should probably stop building up like dust and this whole tower is gone oh they want coffee again but this time i can offer them alcohol instead replace one addiction with another more damaging one not gonna lie a lot of these have become any mighty moe now even though i'm seeing some that are like ugly and i just throw them in the shitty evil factors oh no he's not getting any students because they're not willing to come all the way up the stairs i don't blame them look at that get an elevator for effects sake you know magic god you have literally nothing to you okay you're going in the mess students but i hope they don't find their permanent records because i've listed some as just done wait what is this a sewer can we go there would you like to send an expedition to the dungeon yes oh jesus sending people um who's expendable you know what i'll just send my my good ones i guess all right start the adventure please don't die you're some of my best students look at them go oh god a lot of dead students here a group of cultists stands mute and religious sounds before the monument uh let's blend in and take part we should know it our school is awful it's gotta teach that stuff mad mages laboratory take their potions or destroy the laboratory you know [ __ ] destroy it oh god no i didn't expect opposition oh sweet jesus look at him the size of all right you know what start battle sorry students you gotta take this one for the team okay that student's dead i should have said harry potter i didn't even think about it a troll [ __ ] internet troll kill him okay yeah he's just straight up dead i don't know why they kept targeting him specifically better go back this is getting too dangerous no forward a dark temple take this temple's riches yes battle we need to get that money back to the school okay they're very close to that i think we should go back now that you have the money the one instead you were injured but you know what i got a lot of money out of it look at that that's nice you notice many people in the village dressed in black their faces betraying deep sadness it seems a burial is taking place oh no problem at all when the ceremony is over i'll perform necromancy ah i did a good deed today i guess i also stole the coffin because i i got a cough in bed now i mean if you didn't need it anymore i guess i may as well take it jesus i'm getting non-stop students now and now that i have that coffin i can go and get two vampire cards from the lord of evil and just spam students into shitty evil feckers you can tell i'm just doing it for the money now new students again oh yeah you can go into shitty evil factors you can go there yeah i'm just clearly just phoning it in now but the thing is i'm getting tons of money i got the thing for getting 10 000 gold look at it just flying up go back to the local cemetery get some more students yep your students great i just realized i have no one in the general class okay one you have your entire house to yourself good luck being lonely for the next seven years oh my god the orcs are attacking me again well you know what not to worry because i found this weird potion earlier well actually i brewed it with all my cheese look i'm just marching in howdy how's it going all right i'm gonna use my potion i don't think they were officially here yet that was supposed to kill all monsters but i they're still walking to the school yet now they're attacking okay great i messed up i really am putting the dumb in dumbledore but don't worry i've got new people to replace those people and look i'll go to the cemetery again are they not worried at this point why i keep going to the cemetery and bringing back 10 new students and i love necromancy all right look how much [ __ ] money the school has i think i've done a great job like financially the students their lives are ruined forever but i think we're gonna end it there i hope you enjoyed this is a really cool game i really enjoyed it uh subscribe if you're new would love to have you enrolled in my new school and thank you all for watching hope to see you next time bye for now

Channel: Call Me Kevin

Views: 606,803

Keywords: Call Me Kevin, Call Me, CallMeKevin, CallMe, funny, funny moments, comedy, lets play, gameplay, gaming, harry potter, wizard school, wizard school simulator, school simulator, school game, magic school

Id: qM6MV3Ktn7I

Length: 16min 51sec (1011 seconds)

Published: Wed Aug 18 2021

Reddit Comments

[u/nakirush]

What is the name of this game? I want to play, but Kevin never said the name and rarely posts the titles in the description or tags.

EDIT: Found it. It is called Spellcaster University for anyone interested.