STUPID FACEBOOK POSTS #2

omg word of advice never try to cremate your deceased pet in your oven not only is it the worst smell imaginable they do not turn to ashes they just burn this day did not start off good you're allowed to spray a man with raid if he's under 5 foot 11. does this mean we can use elephant rifles on girls more than 200 pounds letting my teenage daughter shoot their ar for the first time today teach him young and teach him right oh no no no no yeah that's a pretty good place to practice your shooting i guess what could possibly go wrong here firing bullets at head height into your next-door neighbor's wooden fence ah great idea this woman breathes for the first time with new lungs jennifer has an incredible new start to life isn't this great guys like yeah awesome oh wait this is why my organs will be buried with me science and medicine has gone too far oh yeah science has gone so far that is saving people's lives ah screw that yes science what is a suitable punishment for my 14 year old daughter she used my fabric scissors to cut tortilla wraps death okay judy i need you to settle down let's try not to raise your blood pressure levels too high because we don't you ending up in the hospital again if god asked me to kill my child i would because i trust him wow why am i not surprised that this has 539 comments for every time this photo is shared facebook will donate one dollar for the treatment of this puppy's tumor bless you facebook mark zuckerberg you are an absolute champ mate i feel so sorry for this cute dog i mean bro just look at that tumor ah so painful oh oh wait hold on a second it's an avocado caught my daughter messaging boys on a school computer she wasn't supposed to be bringing home turns out max don't take 40 cal very well christian moms against video games people are sending us messages about how nintendo has family-friendly games yes they do have family-friendly video games but they are made by the japanese who are satan's children atheist versus fierce debates without bans or blocking this is a fetus in the second trimester after the mother decided to murder it abortion is murder that's [ __ ] lord voldemort from the last harry potter film today at walmart i told the cashier merry christmas she said happy holidays ma'am i smiled and said you don't have to be afraid anymore president trump gave us christmas back she started crying tears of joy and said merry christmas and then everyone in the store applauded of course they did yeah definitely true story can the admin of this group [ __ ] stop deleting my post my boyfriend has been trying to sell his lizards and your dumb admin keeps deleting it so i'm gonna keep posting it until they learn that it is worth selling on any site so stop deleting my post or i'll report this group from facebook for good uh yeah facebook won't do anything the group clearly states in a pin post that there'll be no sale of pets on this group too bad i don't care what you say he needs them gone so accept it alright so somebody posted this image onto their facebook wall someone is lying and um oh god what is this image i don't believe in dinosaurs anyway what a joke yeah guys this image right here has just successfully exposed the fact that dinosaurs are a complete myth don't believe what you're being told kids facebook knows the truth can't wait till jay-z and beyonce get arrested for eating children eating children yeah satanic rituals what what the [ __ ] forget about the music career what's the point of that anymore just eat some children who are you and why are you posting on katie's wall uh what this is her man and i'm not going to ask again why are you posting on her wall i wrote happy birthday but i send birthday wishes to everyone on my list you should try it never know who needs a boost they might be stuck with some miserable possessive ass she doesn't need your wishes unfriend her immediately or there will be consequences you're a pathetic boy by the way i could take you easy yeah the ball's deep that's right you heard it here first kids don't ever post happy birthday on a female's wall if they are in a relationship because that is against the law that is disrespectful and quite frankly cheating next up we have a pretty funny post that was uh in the urine therapy facebook group yes urine therapy i've been doing urine drops in my eyes and holding a glass of urine over my eyes for short durations throughout the day my eyes are getting red and discharging large amounts of pus i was wondering if anyone else went through this that is called detox keep doing it with fresh urine and the redness and discharge will stop heck yeah dudes i gotta try this out just randomly pouring urine into my own eyes oh so healthy man marriage is a relationship in which one is always right and the other is the husband hello this is a great meme my husband always says yeah honey you're always right even when i buy the wrong type of salami at the store what he doesn't know is that i buy the wrong salami on purpose because he can't yell at me or i will call 9-1-1 when family tries to guilt-trip you into letting them come to your fully vegan wedding even though they're omnivores just for some context some family members were told they are not invited to my wedding because we don't want to host murderers at our wedding which is supposed to be one of the happiest days of our lives imagine not inviting your own mother to your wedding because she's not a vegan oh yeah sorry dad uh you can't come to the wedding dude you still eat meat what a loser pork is the worst thing you can eat the cow and pig are not even natural animals tell me where in nature can you find a cow if i wanted to see a gorilla i'd go to the jungle if i wanted to see a polar bear i'd go to the arctic where in nature is a cow a farm is man-made and cows and pigs are hybridized animals a pig is crossbred between a muskrat bobcat and hyena so you're eating a muskrat just let that sink in this is the worst thing i've ever read yeah but seriously could someone let that sink in their country their rules really ain't none of our business human rights is everybody's business leave a glass of salt water and vinegar to detect negative energies in your home mom that is so fake we'll see about that i ran into an old friend from high school this summer when i found out he is a pilot i locked my arm in his and said you're my new best friend then i said here's why i'm a flat earther is the earth flat or is it a ball he said well it looks flattish i said okay well there's a lot of arguing and debating sphere believers always ask why more pilots don't say earth is flat he pulled me aside and whispered we took an oath and if we break it we lose our pilot's license i whispered back thank you out of respect i will never say his name you can believe me or call me a liar it makes zero difference to me some things are true if you believe it or not next up we have this girl who posted some kind of bikini selfie onto her facebook page and her very own uncle decided to say this wow that's my girl remember when you was young cute and light on my lap you can't sit on my lap today honey i wish just kidding come by one day happy freaking tuesday everyone seriously nasty so every once in a while i've eaten a six inch sub i do like the chopped salads this right here is an extra reason not to eat breads and this person attaches an image of some kind of subway propaganda is this eating fresh subway makes bread with an ingredient called dehydrogen monoxide dhmo is an evil chemical uses an industrial solvent and coolant is used in the production of yoga mats and as a fire retardant it's even a waste product of nuclear power reactors it's definitely not fresh as subway to remove the hydrogen monoxide from their products h2o kills oh no not the hydrogen monoxide god please no anyways uh yeah let's just take a look at some of the replies to this post shall we oh great i just had a six inch veggie delight last week ah seriously i had a six inch turkey last week and that is rare i can't tell if you guys are serious or not this is a hoax picture the hydrogen monoxide is water i really do feel bad for the 55 year old facebook mum that actually saw that subway hoax and was like oh my god guys we got a band subway never send your kids to subway ever again every time i see a cop that's got someone pulled over i hope that person either shoots the cop or the cop steps out into traffic and gets scrambled get a real job you piece of well if being a police officer isn't a real job i don't think there's much hope for the rest of us mom you didn't have your seatbelt on i now declare that you owe us money if you don't pay this money i claim the right to kidnap you if you object to being kidnapped i claim the right to kill you do i make myself clear someone's bitter over a ticket someone left their sleeping baby in a stroller next to me so i've decided to pretend like it's mine so i'm like trying to move my table closer to it so people might think it is today i'm a mother you have no idea how this makes me feel i'm actually so terrified right now the way she's staring at that baby is not okay flowers my neighbor has this flower peeking into my backyard i couldn't get close enough to see if there's a camera hidden inside is this even legal no no no no no oh yeah i'm sure the fbi have something to do with that flower it's definitely giving off a 1080p hd livestream of your back garden sweetheart of course so guys that is it for this episode of stupid facebook posts you guys seem to absolutely love the last episode so fingers crossed you enjoyed this one just as much if you got this far throughout the video leave a comment saying my name is jeff and yeah i'll see you guys in the next one it's your boy fainted signing out dab on haters and papa peace [Music] to change bye

Channel: Fainted

Views: 2,020,867

Rating: 4.9275999 out of 5

Keywords: memes, facebook, posts, meme, stupid facebook posts, facebook memes, facebook fails, facebook posts, dumb facebook posts, dumbest facebook posts, dumbest facebook posts ever, facebook fail, funny, funny posts, funny facebook, fainted

Id: L1YYGsec7OU

Length: 10min 49sec (649 seconds)

Published: Fri May 24 2019