r/Prorevenge "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM???"

welcome to our /po revenge where opus quest for vengeance nearly kills a man my revenge story almost killed a man about three years ago I was working in a pretty big factory they hired through five different temp services so the place was pretty much like a revolving door people came and left without any warning sometimes it was hard to find a familiar face so when someone started stealing my lunches everyone became a suspect after falling victim to the lunchbox bandit for a week straight I'm talking about six 12-hour days with no lunch needless to say my frustration spawned several evil plans but I felt the Carolina Reaper would give me the fastest and most effective results all I know was people were gonna think twice before stealing lunches I spent all night making the best steak fajitas for lunch - the next day I finally minced the Reaper peppers into a nice pico de gallo and topped my Devil fajitas off I carefully placed my fajitas into a Tupperware Bowl garnish them with cilantro and limes then covered them with the clear lid to display their beauty the next morning about an hour after I placed them in the fridge a woman started screaming for help I ran to the lunchroom to find the lunch box bandit laying on the floor gasping for air the Reaper peppers triggered an asthma attack and he had to be rushed to the hospital he never said anything again and neither did I until now I have to wonder if this guy like accidentally found a loophole for murdering people because if someone steals your food but that food is poisonous aren't you kind of off the hook if they die plus we have a worthwhile contribution from someone down in the comments there used to be a lot of alcohol drinking auto factories long hours and hard work maybe people want to escape by getting and staying drunk at work I retired not too long ago and I've got to tell you the kids nowadays are not near as bad as the people I worked with 40 years ago people used to hide their liquor anywhere but not in their lockers if it was found in your locker you could be fired once in a while a slimeball would find and drank someone else's alcohol if it only happened once in a while pilfered was overlooked but some dingleberry decided to look for other people's alcohol and drink it on a regular basis this went on for far too long then the person probably responsible was found out he was the one that turned as white as a sheet and had to leave the lunch table after one of the guys told his fellow employees of having reached the end of his patience and of having filled a third of his bottle with his urine hiding it and finding it empty now to be fair baby the guy just had a weak stomach and hadn't been the booze bandit after all he was a known drunk and often not honest so maybe also the regular unauthorized booze withdrawals stopped after that you know if I were the booze bandit in this story I probably feel a little bit pissed off I got our home phone number long before cellphones were a common thing to have as things have evolved that phone number is part of my history and as utilitarian to use for things I don't want ringing on my cell phone like 99% of anything that requires a phone number for no good reason so I have kept that phone number alive over the years most recently I moved it a few years back to an online service that charges a tiny amount of money per month to host it for me I access it via an s IP client on my computer this story because of the nature of the phone number it randomly rings if I have time I mess with whomever is calling most of the calls are your car warranty is about to expire kind some of the calls are about non-existing credit cards my favorite calls are the scammers I record all calls that come into this phone number in my state only one person needs to know that a call is being recorded and besides these scammers are all overseas so I really do not care about their laws so when a scammer calls I tend to answer and play along sometimes these calls last a few minutes before they give up on me today I set a new record a total of one hour of their time wasted the call comes in as normal I string the guy along I play dumb I keep them thinking I am an easy target after 40 minutes I tell him I have to hang up and could he call me back in an hour to my surprise this idiot calls me back so I decided to see if I could get him to let me connect to him by continuing to play dumb my plan is based on knowing that they have a handful of tools at their disposal easiest of which is TeamViewer so I play along until they get me on a TeamViewer but I never give them the real information on my end I just ask for my partner ID the idea is that with TeamViewer you can switch who is showing the screen after you make the initial connection I know that I have but a precious few seconds of time if I managed to get them to give me their ID and password to make my plan happen so I have a dummy terminal set aside for all this I quickly write out my set of commands so I can copy them to my clipboard and launch them as soon as I get connected sure enough they give me their ID and password I am ready and I strike paste the commands into a run window and let it rip as I see the window pop up with the command prompt and the deletion of folder starts the guy starts to stutter and asks what are you doing sir I keep playing dumb until my connection is terminated files have been deleted the scammer is pissed he starts to curse at me I eventually start taunting him and cursing back at him after a while he hangs up and the best thing about this post is that opie included the audio recording of the phone call so now I'm gonna play the part for you where this scammer gets pissed fair warning there's a lot of cursing and I'm kind of worried about the monetization so I'm gonna bleep out most of it you're trying to be a smart right you're trying to be smart what I'm I'm not smart to be very trying to be very smart man I'm not smart at all what what whatever you doing at my computer you told me you trying to do you told me to connect to your computer but what were you trying to do on my computer I was doing what you were telling me to do is trying to click on action no you're not clicking on action you're trying to my computer man what why do you talk with no such language you your mother kiss your mother with that mouth you kiss your mother with that mouth curse you curse like that to your customers mother [ __ ] you much you're trying to [ __ ] my computer mother [ __ ] how would I put your computer I don't know anything about computers mmm what the Center for Budget how many sisters you have mother [ __ ] I was like [ __ ] you one by one I'll get together I'll put them together mother first you have to find your distance first you have to find your little oh that is a delight if you wouldn't listen to the full audio recording I've got a link to opiez post down in the description first a little backstory I am a college student and cycle to campus everyday it's not a long ride at all but I have to go through a zone where it's illegal to ride a bicycle on the sidewalk so I'm forced to ride on the road most drivers don't care and just go around me since I stay to the edge and don't make myself a nuisance also I have a sucky bike that I can mute on this will be important later a few weeks ago a guy in a Ford SUV I don't know exactly which kind started yelling at me as he drove by while I was on the road only zone all the usual good off the road roads are for cars you're too slow kind of stuff I get that from drivers on a weekly basis I just ignore and keep going this man was special though since he cut right in front of me and slammed on his brakes after yelling I was able to stop before I hit him and he floored it out of there yelling better be careful next time bike I was pretty mad but I hadn't got his license plate or anything and I doubt anything could be done about it anyway there was no real proof over lunch I told one of my friends who works as an EMT the story and he got seriously pissed off apparently he has seen the results of a car successfully break checking a cyclist and they aren't pretty two days later the same Ford SUV jerk tried to break check me again I was expecting it as soon as I heard him yelling get on the sidewalk bike from behind so I avoided a crash again I told my EMT friend over lunch again and he was even madder than before I wanted to let it go since I can't really do anything about him and my bicycle isn't going to win in a crash this guy keeps trying to break check me every few days during my morning commute whenever we're on the same patch of road at the same time about a week ago my EMT friend told me that he told my story to one of his friends in the campus police who was equally pissed off the two of them wanted to catch this jerk driver the plan was to have the policeman parked on the side of the road in hopes of catching and pulling over the jerk I heartily agreed and the officer pulled some strings and had himself posted on speed or catching duty for that stretch of road a few days passed uneventfully with no sign of the road rager I saw the cop parked in the same spot on the side of the road every day a spot where the road has a left turn lane and a straight lane finally I'm pedaling along and I hear the familiar voice scream get the heck off the road [ __ ] I yelled back catch me then and took off I was spinning my scrawny little chicken legs as hard as they could go and PEG the throttle I guess this made the driver even matter because I heard his engine roar as he pursued me he shifted into the left lane as I stayed in the right I looked to the side and saw a nasty old man in the driver's seat with a passenger window open his mouth was going like he was yelling but I couldn't hear him over the wind noise I saw the police car spot approaching and started to slow down taking the opportunity the driver swung right in front of me I don't know if it was the speed or his anger that made him swing wide but he cut across my lane and crashed straight into the back of the police car I barely applied my brakes slowed down to about 15 miles per hour and crashed into the side of his car the officer got out spitting mad would be an understatement and called an ambulance and another police car everyone was unhurt since the jerk was oh my god everyone was unhurt since the jerk was going only like 25 miles per hour but there was enough of an impacted trigger the SUV's airbags the jerk ended up getting arrested for driving drunk seriously who drinks before 9:00 a.m. for an illegal lane change and probably other stuff too I don't know all the details I imagine that causing a crash like that would entail some additional charges the guy ended up having to pay for extensive repairs on the police cruiser and for a new ebike to replace the one he destroyed by cutting in front of me the frame snapped on top of that I hear that his car was to find as totaled by his insurance company since the airbags went off so he also has to pay for a new car with any luck he'll lose his license from the drunk driving charges and won't be able to menace cyclists again yeah I'm gonna go I don't know I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that crashing into a parked police car is probably pretty bad from a legal and insurance standpoint I lived across the street from a very bored stay-at-home mom who's excess idle time turned her into an insufferable busybody her husband backed out of the driveway and slammed into my roommates car parked on the curb he apologized gave us his insurance info and took care of it he was never a problem because he accepted responsibility for what he did his wife however demanded that we never ever park any cars at the curb again because we can't get out of our driveway otherwise the street was very wide she was just completely unable to accept that the accident was her husband's fault and figured we were somehow responsible for it ergo we were responsible for preventing it in the future we told her that we would avoid parking there whenever possible but that we still had the legal right to park on the street and that if necessary we would still do so and that it was her and her husband's responsibility to avoid hitting other people's legally parked cars when backing out of the driveway she wasn't happy with that answer but just told us we better stay out of her family's way and stormed off one day she came storming over banging on the front door cussing us out we got her on our security camera saying if you don't move that effing car in the next 10 minutes I am going to effing total it with my truck it'll be your fault and you'll have to pay for the damage to my Epping vehicle to this I simply responded I don't know whose car that is but I didn't park it there I have you on camera so if you do anything to that car I'll have to call the police and hand over this tape she then threatened to sue me for invasion of privacy for recording her and still insisted that we move the car even though it wasn't our property we just ignored her and she did not do anything to the car we did keep the recording though a few weeks later I had a friend visit from out of town he parked his car in the curb and then started unloading some stuff from his trunk she came storming out screaming and cussing at him I have told you repeatedly never parked your freaking car on this curb if you don't move it I am going to freakin total it and you can freaking pay for a new gosh darn car as well as the damage you do to mine he tried to calm her down and asked if there was somewhere else he could park and she replied with you can park it in heck because that's where you'll be after I freaking kill you unfortunately for her he had his dash cam running the whole time and it captured everything he called the police and she was arrested for threatening to commit vandalism and for threatening violence a few days later she left a long winded hate letter in our mailbox it was written as if it were an open letter from the entire neighborhood and it basically said that nobody knows who you and everyone wishes you would move away and nobody wants you living in our neighborhood thing is she forgot about the security cameras I took the video of her opening my mailbox which included her taking all our letters out of the mailbox and rifling through them and I gave them to the post office this led to her getting arrested for a second time that week after that we used her to arrests our collection of security and dashcam footage and her letter to get a restraining order against her that actually prohibited her from entering her own home and then we called the police every time we saw her because she was in violation of the order she ended up having to live in a hotel room and her husband came over apologized to us and asked if we could drop the restraining order so his wife could come home I told him I would do it but only if she wrote me my wife our roommates and the friend of mine she threatened a one-page apology for her harassment and that she would promise to never ever contact us again for any reason whatsoever moving forward I received no apology and the house went on the market a week later some freaking people all right guys once again can we get an F down in the comments for this poor poor husband that was our slash Pro revenge and if you liked this video please like and subscribe because it really helps me out

Channel: rSlash

Views: 1,647,425

Rating: 4.9292045 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, prorevenge, r/prorevenge, prorevenge posts, prorevenge funny, prorevenge fails, pro revenge, funny pro revenge

Id: eYvjJzFDjNg

Length: 17min 3sec (1023 seconds)

Published: Sun Apr 28 2019