r/Entitledparents "GIVE MY BABY YOUR BEER!"

welcome to our slash entitle parents we're a mommy demands give my son your alcohol our first post is from unoriginal use now for bit of context last weekend was Liberation Day in Holland and many cities were having festivals to celebrate most of these festivals have free entrance so they tend to crack down on people bringing their own food and drinks to increase profits from beverage sales a mate of mine lives within the area where the festival is taking place though so usually we drop our booze at his place and retrieve it during the festival since it didn't seem like a terrific idea to walk around with a bottle of Jack Daniels I mixed it into a 1 liter Coca Cola vanilla bottle with just enough coke that it looked like coke and went to do the festival grounds while walking around with the bottle of coke I feel a tap on my shoulder festival etiquette is to move over to the side to let somebody pass after which I move along I suddenly feel a hand grabbing my shoulder and trying to pull me back so I turn around and I'm faced with a typical Karen where'd you get that she points at the bottle I brought it from home can my kid have some me not wanting everybody to know I had booze on me said they sell coke over there you can buy your kid a fresh cold one they don't sell vanilla coke there and he doesn't like the regular one he once years and she holds out her hand if he doesn't like the regular one I'm pretty sure he won't like this any better meanwhile the kid has started squealing about how he's thirsty and what's that one and entitled mom starts giving me a demanding stare ok lady I'm gonna be honest with you half of this bottle is whiskey and I don't think it's a good idea to give the kid whiskey you're lying you just made that up so you wouldn't have to share with my baby now give it to me while I kinda shrug and turn away an attempt to disappear into the crowd the kid grabs the bottle with both hands wrenches it from my hand and makes a run for it his mom in tow I follow them and find them just in time to see the kid take a few massive swings from the bottle after which he starts violently throwing up almost immediately figuring the best move for me would be to not further pursue that now a vomit covered bottle of Jack and Coke I decide to head over to my mates and mix a new one in passing I throw the entitled mom a told you and make my way into the crowds within seconds entitled mom charges me and starts attempting to take a swing at me you poisoned my baby security we're separated by bystanders and a stallholder get security which questions both me and entitled mom he gave my baby a bottle of poison and told him it was coke I want him arrested sir what's in the bottle a pre-mixed whiskey and coke somewhat on the generous side with the whiskey and why did you give that to a kid I didn't sir I was mostly planning on getting smashed myself to be fair they thought it was coke wouldn't believe me when I told him it was booze and snatched the bottle from me what you're seeing here is just the result of the kid taking a drink before I was able to stop him at this point a bystander chimes in confirming that he saw the kid snatch the bottle from my hand although he hadn't heard the conversation security tells the mom to not pull that stunt again to take her still crying kid to the first aid post and instructs me to be more careful with the next batch I'm inevitably about to make you know putting aside the booze stuff what I can't understand is why these mothers want their kids to swap spit with strangers can you imagine living the rest of your life with mouth herpes because when you were five your mom gave you a bottle from some random stranger and you drink from it our next post is from top guerrilla 17 long ago way back in the before time I worked for one of those book warehouse club stores my trade was simple I was a Wrangler of the silver Buffalo and dutifully retrieved the old ghetto strollers I did the job in and of so wasn't the worst I'd ever had I got plenty of exercise got to be outside and generally didn't have to interact with the members calling them customers was taboo for the most part for the most parts the thing about this job is that the company I worked for had a reputation for being cheap thusly more often than not I was on my own out in the parking lot big whoop you might say you gathered cards you just see how hard my job is yeah well shut up this is my story but munch I digress the reason that being alone sucked is that this store didn't have just one kind of cart heck they didn't even just have two kinds of cards you had your classic garden-variety cart the kiddie cart with the plastic facade to make it resemble a car the electric scooter is which weren't supposed to leave the store but did so with alarming frequency and finally the bulky hard-to-control flatbeds on top of that whenever someone needed help loading their hall into their minivans I was the guy they called you know because the greeter is cashiers and managers were all busy as you might expect one man cannot be in multiple places at once and as a result on some of our busier days it became incredibly difficult to keep enough carts in the vestibule our story begins on one of those days so there I was chucking along like a good worker drone struggling to keep up with the sheer volume of people coming in to buy cheap bulk goods sure enough I get a call on the radio from my manager Opie we need you to help some members load their purchases I'd love to but I am barely able to keep up out here as is just do it Opie you can afford to stop gathering carts for two minutes narrator he couldn't I didn't want to push my luck so I complied after spending 20 minutes loading people's purchases because when one person needs it suddenly they all need it I came back to find my vestibule a near ghost town save for a single line of carts that was half gone and the Karen I won't waste time describing this specimen she was the prototype you know what she looked like there she stood menacing tapping her foot with such speed that could make any metal drummer green with envy you could collect the contempt in her gaze in a jar where are the big flat ones I blinked for a moment I'm sorry hug Mexicans for the record I'm very much white where are the flat ones oh you mean the flatbeds I'm sorry I was just helping some other members load their merchandise and have it had a chance to oh my god I don't care about your excuses you have one job and a trained monkey could do it I just want this lady out of my face so I don't fight it sorry ma'am I'll grab one from the parking lot for you you'd better so I go back out to the lot and find a whole line of flatbeds sticking out of a crowd blocking several parking spaces I pushed them all into the vestibule where she waits huffing about how I am wasting her valuable time I separated one from the rest and bring it to her I'm terribly sorry about the wait ma'am she Lear's at me with utter malice unbelievable and with that she dismisses herself into the store where she will be someone else's problem I shake my head and return to doing what I'm paid to do about 15 minutes later I'm returning a line of carts when I see her pushing her flat bid to her Miata and joing about stupid people most certainly referring to me on her cellphone you know what she had bought what she had insisted on having a flat bid for a cake this wasn't even like a big cake it was one of those little circular numbers anyways I witness as she continues to Yammer on about how I nearly ruined ruined I tell you her precious baby's birthday party when the most glorious thing happened still clutching her phone with those highlights Coupe Clause of hers she attempts to pick up the cake with one hand the plastic topper pops off and she spills the cake all over her undoubtedly expensive designer outfit seething with white-hot rage she locks eyes with me you give me another cake no terribly sorry ma'am I've got one job and these carts won't gather themselves I walked away poo eating grin plastered on my face as her shrieks faded into the distance behind me I've had my share of nasty customer interactions before but this one really took the cake our next post is from gadget sim we a pregnant woman tried to take my taxi despite having seen me waiting outside and having heard me make the call she even said waiting for a cab to which I replied yeah before I got back to my phone games to pass the time about ten minutes pass and my taxi arrives and I hit over but the woman says sorry but this is my taxi the driver asked for me by name and the woman says that's me I'm like there's no way you have my name and called the same cab company I call an unpopular taxi company because I'm friends with a few of the drivers and this was one of them I say but I called it and she's opening the door already the driver literally says hey so this is her taxi pointing to me the woman looks upset and says but I'm pregnant I really did call this taxi too and blink really is my name she's trying to steal my taxi I don't even know this woman and I'm getting really really upset because I've worked a long day and don't need this the driver and I exchange frustrated looks since he knows me and he knows I called and then he says alright I'll use my phone to see who called the cab he uses call recognition and dials the number my phone goes off the pregnant woman now tries a new tactic racism I love you pakis he's from East India are the same you'll believe anyone who gives you a dollar anyway i scooted around to the other side to get him behind the driver while he kept all the other doors locked so she couldn't get in she was furious and yelling the whole time and my driver starts pulling out and says to me I would have happily taken her to where she wanted to go with you but at this point I'm just going to tell everyone to avoid her he took her picture to warn his fellow drivers about her racism and potentially threatening behavior since by the end she was threatening to break windows and I went the hack home I don't even understand the reasoning what kind of person is gonna be like oh well you called me a racial slur in that case let me help you out our next post is from the Kiwi 2:47 when I was 12 my parents moved us to a new place and our neighbors were unpleasant there was the entitled mother and the father I never met him so I can't call him entitled with two sons one was 13 and the other was about 8 or 9 the older brother was a decent guy we were school buss pals but the younger one was an issue but looking back on it he probably had a social disorder like Asperger's or perhaps ADHD my mom did not like this kid a few incidents happened before with him and my mom nicknamed him the orange haired Goblin I'll call him og this story is told from my mother's perspective as she dealt with entitled mom despite this happening over 10 years ago I do remember that it happened but the written dialogue here is pulled from my mother's retelling of the story so there's a tad of embellishment this was in the day of dial up in my country it was fantastic my mom and I had a system right quickly load a flash game with the heads up then disconnect from the internet and plug the phone back in it was the school holiday so it was just my mom and I at home when dad was at work so it was an otherwise empty house when this happened my mom said o P you're supposed to give a heads up when you're unplugging the phone I need to make a call me from the backyard I'm not on the computer though I'm outside mom pokes her head out the kitchen window sees me looks confused then turns around she and I had the same idea so we both head to the room with a computer and find orange haired Goblin excuse me what are you doing my mom told me I can use your computer why don't you use yours despite hating this kid my mother is not unreasonable she's not going to get annoyed with an 8 to 9 year old I broke it well I'm sorry but she can't decide that you have to ask her permission besides you can't let yourself in our house anyway you can finish the game but I need to plug the phone back in so you can't load anything else mom then gives me a look that man's keep an eye on him she later told me she didn't want him to break our computer if he indeed broke his own so she needed me to keep an eye on him the kid then leaves then ten minutes later we hear a knock on our door I go to answer but my mom gets there first my kid told me you won't let him on your computer sorry who my son oh right the kid who let himself in he told me you told him he could use my computer why is that his was broken and I needed to entertain him so that makes it okay I wouldn't have minded letting him if you had just discussed it with me first he's an angel there's no harm in him using it clearly there is if he broke his at this point entitled mother must have been getting annoyed I heard this part for myself as she started shouting very loudly he only broke his keyboard he spilled his drink on it it's safe for him to use yours because he learned his lesson still doesn't give him or you the right to come and go as you please and use our property without permission but you said you would have let him so what's the problem my problem is a strange kid I barely know just walked into my house and used my computer because his mother said he could if that's how you treat your neighbors then you or your children aren't come here anymore my mom then slammed the door and that was the last we heard of entitled mom though she'd stare at us if she saw us leave the house my mom wouldn't make jokes about the Kate if she saw him in the street like oh man it's the orange haired Goblin remember to lock the door when school resumed I was talking to the older brother on the school bus he told me that his mother asked him to steal our keyboard if he ever comes around again he understood his mother was a wackadoodle so we just had a laugh about it I think the easiest solution of this problem will be for Opie's mom to say oh well if it's okay for your son to come over and use our computer then I'm sure you won't mind sending my son over to your place to feed himself sweetie go ahead and go over to the neighbor's place and make yourself a sandwich I'm sure they won't mind feeding you that was our slash entitled parents and later today I actually have a phone call with the people at the merch store so hopefully we can get that set up pretty soon I know it's been like a week or two since I put out a call for designs but I just wanted to let everyone know that I'm still working on it it's gonna take a little bit of time to get the store set up but hopefully I can get that out and maybe like a week or two I don't know I'm just kind of guessing because I've never set up you know a big merch store like this before but hopefully we can get some cool you go puppy bloopers and funny caring t-shirts out for you guys pretty soon so stay tuned

Channel: rSlash

Views: 2,015,193

Rating: 4.9276266 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, comedy, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, entitledparents, r/entitledparents, entitledparents posts, entitledparents fails, entitled parents, entitled parents fail, r/ entitled parents

Id: N-amdjjVWGE

Length: 16min 50sec (1010 seconds)

Published: Tue May 14 2019