r/Choosingbeggars "PAY FOR MY WEDDING!" Funny Reddit Posts

welcome to our slash choosing beggars where other people expect you to pay for their wedding my husband and I are looking for someone to play the harmonica while we have sex no weirdos please I feel like there are probably three or four people out there on planet earth and this exact thing is there one fetish and they're like oh my god this is my moment best price for the four-player hey two thousand one hundred and ninety five dollars all prices are on the website prices are fixed now I won't pay that much no problemo so what's the best price two thousand one hundred and ninety five dollars all prices are on the website prices are fixed no too expensive I'm trying to negotiate a price sorry all prices are fixed unless you're ordering five or more are you a chatbot uh yes I want to speak to a real person I am real sir no you're not you keep repeating a script customer service complaints put me through to customer service put me through to complaints I want to speak to management real person please speak to a real person putting you through to a real person now hi I'm a real person I've looked at your query prices are all under the ads fixed and not negotiable unfortunately surely you can do better on price unfortunately grant prices are fixed just like any other store so no best price unless you're ordering five or more sorry mate I want to that's two times two thousand one hundred and ninety five dollars that's the price of the website best price for two sorry I misunderstood that would be two thousand one hundred ninety five dollars times two no discount for two wait are you about to proceed further you'll need to prove you're not a robot if you and your stupid machines please type in the word that appears in this image dong head you are a bot invalid CAPTCHA please type in the word that appears in this image and to ensure that no one here is a bot please complete this CAPTCHA before continuing the video seriously with the thousands upon thousands of dollars being raised and food being collected this is what the Fredericton food bank gave us for Christmas dinner I am stunned not even a bottle of juice for my children please don't get me wrong I'm forever grateful to have the resource of the food bank but I want to know where all that money in food went to a turkey a five-pound bag of potatoes two boxes of stuffing a bag of carrots a bag of apples and a bag of oranges one can of string beans one can of cranberry sauce and one loaf of bread one box of chocolates and a dozen sugar cookies why didn't we even get juice or butter guys I know she seems like a choosing picker but please don't get her wrong she's for effort grateful you can just feel the gratitude dripping from this post so if anything she's a grateful beggar woman in line in Costco totally nonchalant to return her Christmas tree because it is dead On January 4th I saw the whole thing go down with my own two eyes about 30 minutes ago if I didn't see it I wouldn't believe that someone had so little more values or lack of conscience oh ho ho what do you want for Christmas choosing bigger Santa I want every single gift on this list and on top of that I expect you to pay me for every single Christmas decoration that I put up because basically I put them up for you so realistically you should be the one who pays me for them review one-star my son took a $1 chocolate bar and the manager demanded I pay the money made him cry over $1 the audacity of some people they just won't let me steal what's wrong with these people this happened a few years ago during the summer when I was working part time at my parents house my stepsister the choosing beggar had asked me if I could watch her kids for a few hours at her apartment I jumped at the opportunity to be out of my Aaron's house and just relax especially since she said the kids ages two and three would already be asleep for the night note that I did this without pay because I knew she couldn't afford to pay me I get there around 9:00 p.m. she waves goodbye and says she'll be back in a few hours the three hours are fine I'm just chilling in the living room watching movies and messing around on my phone my nephew stay asleep around 1:00 a.m. I text her asking what her eta is she texts me within minutes saying she's running late whatever it's not like I have to get up early I feel myself dozing off so I lie down and decide to take a nap I wake up to the sound of crying and go check on the nephews the two-year-old is awake and being fussy I glance at the clock at the bedside and I'm shocked when I realized it's 6:00 in the morning I checked my phone and my mom has called me and texted me asking if I ended up staying the night there are no messages from my sister I immediately call her while playing with younger nephew while older nephew is now awake attempting to climb up my leg she doesn't answer instead I get a text from her saying she's in Colorado not our state she won't be back for three days and oh you've got to take care of the kids they've got nowhere else to go it's just for three days at this point I know I've been set up and I text her if she is not home in the next five hours I will have to take the kids to their grandparents not my parents who both happen to be busy but estranged dad's parents I tell her I'm sure they'd be more than happy to take them both since they never get to see them she's instantly texting me paragraphs telling me I'm not allowed to take her kids there they judge her and they had no respect for her not true she just hates them because of her baby daddy she tells me if I take them there she will sue me put me in jail for stealing her children blah blah I tell her that she shouldn't have abandoned me with her kids then the following conversation occurs to the best of my knowledge you agreed to take my kids you're therefore responsible for them you can't give them to someone else I agreed to three hours I am 18 years old and you left me with really young kids I have worked this evening I can't watch them for three days come back now or I'll take them to their grandparents they'd be happy to take them I can't believe you're making such a big deal out of this I'm giving you my apartment for three days and you get to spend time with your nephews you should be paying me for the apartment you're so selfish Wow okay I already called grandparents they're free to take them so that's where they're going I'm taking your children to grandparents don't ask me again to watch your kids UFE grunt if I was your full sister you do it you butthole all you care about is yourself you won't even spend time with your nephews effing piece of doodoo I hope you rot in hell at this point I ignore her call the grandparents who are more than happy to take them for a few days they come and pick them up and I leave when she gets back from the trip she stayed the whole three days she shows up at my parents house and starts cussing me out my parents kick her out and I don't see here for the rest of the summer I really love how this woman's like you can't just dump my kids on someone without permission that's child kidnapping and I'll sue you meanwhile it's totally okay for her their actual mother to dump her kids on someone without permission and then go off and do who knows what I'm guessing like a music festival or something or maybe she's she's doing typical entitled parent stuff like demanding that people sign their house over to her my husband was asked to be the best man at his longtime best friend's wedding we didn't get along super great with his fiance but they were a package deal and of course we wanted to show support my husband and I live in a major city and his friend lives in a small town a few hours away so when it came time for wedding clothes shopping they came into the city and stayed with us the friend his fiancee her BFF and her mom the fiancee invited me to go with them to pick out the wedding dress and the bridesmaid dresses as I was the only one not in the bridal party I thought this was just to be inclusive I went along and after everything was picked out the fiance put her nose about an inch away from my nose and said will you be one of my bridesmaids I was calm really off-guard and felt like I had no choice but to say yes this girl is the kind of person who gets her feelings hurt anytime she hears no like even if she invites you to something with no notice and you already had plans if you say no it's going to be weeks of drama and pouting so I stand with something about how flattered I was and suddenly I was stuffed into a mermaid green monstrosity of a bridesmaid's dress when it came time to pay for the dresses I was told that we were expected to buy our own dresses the dress she had picked out for us to wear was a hundred and twenty-five bucks this was an unexpected expense but I kind of side and pulled out my card then when they were buying the wedding dress and mother-in-law's dress their card didn't work tried three times declined so I had to pay and they said they'd hit me back later another four hundred fifty bucks the best man clothes were also a fiasco the groom decided on formal tuxedos with tails and top hats the rental on that ended up being 200 bucks plus fifty bucks for a top hat which I guess we had to buy and couldn't rent but that's cool totally lots more occasions that would call for a top hat right so that was that until the week of the wedding we bypassed a lot of the wedding showers and engagement parties as we were not living in the same area and could not drive down every other week we did come down the week before for me to attend the bachelorette party and my husband to host the bachelor party and we stayed till the wedding I spent about $200 on bachelorette party gifts as another bridesmaid asked me to pick something up for her too and she wanted me to buy these glass sex toys that were decidedly not cheap obviously she didn't pay me back and I was getting used to that the groom is a gamer nerd so they had a LAN party for the bachelor party the only expense we ended up fronting for that was alcohol which ended up being about 300 bucks it became increasingly obvious through the week that no planning had gone to the wedding itself the city park had been reserved but no chairs or decorations have been arranged for it and the food and cake were all going to be do-it-yourself it took an army of everyone involved aside from the Brighton of course to make all the finger sandwiches baby quiches mini cheesecakes and other nibbles required it was the height of summer in the south and hauling 100 folding chairs and string twinkle lights and flowers and above a hundred degree weather was indescribably frustrating nobody in their right mind would plan an outdoor wedding in July in our area and also select ultra formal clothing no the bride was two hours late to her own wedding she had her friend come and do all of our hair and she expected to be paid fifty dollars each at the end money is just hemorrhaging out of me at this point and I'm in such a state of exhaustion and shock that I no longer care the wedding happens everyone seems happy my husband and I were preparing to drag ourselves home to recuperate physically and financially then the bride stops me she grabs my arm oh I think this is where she thinks us for helping to make her big nightmarish day a success no such luck she is crying and shaking with anger and she says I guess you didn't get me a wedding present just so you know when someone invites you to a wedding you were supposed to get them a present I froze and I could not close my mouth I'm sorry what she got dragged off to take such and such picture and I was still standing there failing to compute what had just happened to me we just left couldn't really say bye or anything I was just so done the car ride home was so much repeating what had happened to each other and just being at a loss we needed a lot of time to just process how much of a ride we've been taking on with No thank you no apologies actually they were just completely ungrateful and thought we'd scanned them out of a wedding present I feel like I need to add that we are not rich we're a young working couple who basically emptied their bank accounts to help someone else's wedding not be a complete dumpster fire due to lack of planning wow that's super rude I can't believe Opie didn't get this woman a wedding gift what kind of selfish person spends $2,000 of their money to fund someone else's wedding and then won't give them a wedding gift maybe can you create a mascot unfortunately I do not create mascot logos okay then can you help me create a neat logo that is a letter B the channel theme is blue and white yes for sure if you're able to pay will need examples as I mentioned first before I set a price I have to pay yes hello can't you do it for free please you know what since you asked again I will do it for free oh my god seriously yes why would I want to earn money from a skill like designing which takes valuable time I may as well just do all the work for free am i right thank you so so so much are / woosh I live in an apartment house so on my way down I meet a neighbor I guess around 35 ish a woman who just moved in with her son's six months ago or so so she asks bringing your PC down to the basement and I tell her it's just the case and she's like oh my son wanted to build one and he could need a case could we maybe have it and since I didn't need it anymore I said sure there's still all the cables and two fans inside just some minor scratches on the case I figured that'd be it but then she asked would you mind helping him build the PC he hasn't got any experience with that since this was only the second time I built a PC I said I am not that experienced either and since PC parts can be quite expensive I don't want to be at fault and lose your or his money if something breaks there's a PC shop around the corner doing it for decent prices though and she literally just said oh don't worry it'll be fine if something breaks you can just replace it and I'm like what yeah you're working after school aren't you so if it breaks you could just replace it and I'm like brah I work at some sucky fast-food chain for minimum wage I'm not gonna spend my free time building your son's PC and paying for damages when you describe this woman it honestly sounds like you're being sarcastic but actually it's all true hi this is your neighbor from downstairs that you've never actually spoken - before since you're making those fat stacks working at McDonald's I think you should buy computer parts for my son build him a PC and then pay for any damages that he incurs thanks that was are slashed using beggars and instead of my normal outro I've compiled sort of a blooper reel of what it's like to try and record a YouTube video when you have a puppy we did come down the week before to attend a bachelorette party and my husband - host I spent about $200 on bachelorette party gifts as another bridesmaid asked me to pick something up I spent about 200 bucks on bachelorette party gifts as another bridesmaid asked me to pick something I spent about $200 on bachelorette party gifts as another bridesmaid asked me to pick something up for her - and she wanted me to buy these you go man the wedding happens everyone the wedding happens dog do you I'm trying to record please dog please I need that court no no you go you go please I need that court I mean it I can't work without this court gimme gimme thank you the car right thank you go ouch Oh dog eat your bone eat your bone here you go yum-yum my feet thank you

Channel: rSlash

Views: 3,548,816

Rating: 4.9014525 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, choosingbeggars, beggar, r/choosingbeggars, choosing beggar, choosing

Id: 7VY9CAYnCsY

Length: 16min 59sec (1019 seconds)

Published: Sat Mar 30 2019