r/Choosingbeggars "FREE MONEY ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH!" Funny Reddit Posts

welcome to our slash choosing beggars we're free money isn't good enough our next story is from Jonathan Elbe this separate it made me remember my ultimate story on this subject as far as baffling behavior my lifelong friend wanted to live in my condo that I wasn't actively using because I had relocated to another city an apartment before I was going to then rent out the condo I told him that he could use it for a small amount of time until he found his own place maybe even six months just not for too long I paid two hundred and eighty bucks a month in HOA dues it had a pool security etc and property taxes rained me about 200 a month plus the electric bill was then assessed by unit each month I told him he could stay at the condo for five hundred and fifty dollars a month just to keep it going and this was in Southern California he agreed to pay didn't seem to grumble or anything and I honestly thought I was doing something really nice for my longest time friend an 820 square foot condo with a pool for five hundred and fifty bucks a month in California you're just not going to find that I wasn't making a dime off him I just didn't want to lose money and subsidize his lifestyle out of my pocket fast forward a few months my other friends all informed me that he's been texting them about what a bastard I am that I'd charge him rent to stay there like how could a friend charge money for that my friends didn't know what was the deal so they asked me and I told them I'm not charging him any rent I'm literally just asking that he pays the cost of the unit and nothing more for reference when he left eventually I rented it for several years at $1,300 a month so he was not even paying half of market rent I own the condo free and clear so I had lower cost with no mortgage thus allowing me to charge him less and break even finally when we eventually went to move my stuff out of there and yes it was fully furnished - with a nice TV kitchen items everything you could need he had broken about 1/4 of my dishes he looked a used condom hanging on a trash can and while my 105 pound girl friend and I packed my stuff he sat on the couch not offering to help at all even once in three days he laughed about the condom he took a giant dump in the bathroom and clogged the toilet requiring a plumber to fix and when we went to dinner he forgot his wallet and never paid me back he even woke us up early after we were up late packing by talking on the phone with online friends he met on various chat forums we didn't remain friends long after that and needless to say I couldn't believe just how oblivious that is to get such a good deal then badmouth the person for doing you a favor and trashed their place I spent a bunch more in housekeeping and my real estate agent who was renting it out after he left said the housekeeping service had never seen a place so filthy we noticed that also besides the condom there was dirt and filth everywhere he wiped it out then we have a similar story from comfy pants down in the comments I've had a friend like this she had split with her boyfriend and said she was in need of somewhere to stay while she looked for another place I understood this to mean she was looking for an apartment and would be crashing for a few weeks I told her she could stay if she paid half the utilities and grocery costs while there which she seemed fine with the finished basement in the house I was in at the time which was fully furnished pretty much gave her a very large bedroom with walk-in closet and a giant living room and office area at over 900 square feet to work with plus her own bathroom on the main floor and access to a large well-equipped kitchen it turned out her version of getting a new place was finding a new guy to shack up with so she could continue to live rent-free when I told her how much she owed after the first month she complained that she didn't eat much and didn't use the internet or watch TV so she shouldn't have to pay for those things I told her the other option was that she pay one-third of the mortgage for the living space which was significantly more costly she threw a fit about how terrible of a person I was for asking of a friend a couple of weeks later while I was out of town for the weekend she packed up her stuff and some of mine and left to stay with another friends I returned to a note that pretty much said she'd left she wasn't going to pay for the additional time she'd been there that I was a greedy jerk and she was done with me unless I apologize are being so inconsiderate to her in her time of need I checked out the space she'd vacated to find mold everywhere she had run humidifiers 24/7 the whole time she'd been there with no fans to circulate the air I usually ran a dehumidifier to keep that from happening I had to hire someone to decontaminate the space and throw away half the furniture a few months later she sent me an email trying to make up after she'd pulled the same stunt with a few other people and had nowhere to go my response email contained only an itemization of the cost I had incurred cleaning up the biohazard she had left behind and replacement cost for the furniture she'd ruins van it almost sounds as bad as my roommate he's been waking me up at 6:00 a.m. every morning he eats all my food he hasn't spent $1 to pay for rent or groceries or utilities and to top it all off he regularly relieves himself on my kitchen floor he's lucky he's an adorable little puppy whom I love more than life itself otherwise I'd probably have to kick him out our next post is from boob honest this happened earlier today I had dropped my daughter off at an event and had about 90 minutes to kill so I decided to hit one town over to pick up a few geocaches that had been taunting me after my second geocache hunt I / - cross the street from a little bodega to see where I should try my luck next as I'm going through the nearby geocaches on my phone I noticed a man begging for money from passers-by outside of the bodega I found a likely cache then decided to buy a bottle of water at the bodega side bar I Drive a 2010 Chrysler 300c all-wheel drive I inherited the car from my mother when she passed away in December 2017 it's not the type of car that I would buy for myself but it runs well and I have few complaints about it so I Drive it I left my car crossed the street and sure enough the guy asked me for some money for some food I was feeling generous and it was a nice day so I reached into my wallet and handed him a five-dollar bill given the neighborhood the odds were good that he'd use it for drugs but whatever I went inside bought my water and left as I walked out the man stopped me hey brother you have anything else for me excuse me I mean you must have lots of money driving that big car of yours didn't I just give you five bucks yeah man but that's chump change I'll bet you got plenty more on you right now I casually take a step back so you'd rather have something other than the five dollars I gave you yeah how about it I smile sure thing I pull out my wallet where's that five I gave you he hands me back the five dollar bill I take it I don't know what I was thinking I'm so sorry I put the five dollar bill back into my wallet and pocket the wallet have a great day and with that I turned and went back to my car I was about halfway across the street when the guy started yelling at me I turned and waved more to make sure he wasn't chasing after me than to go to maan but he just stood there yelling racist comments at me by the time I got in my car and pulled away he was standing on the street cursing me out I waved and left how entitled you have to be to say hey a stranger this free money you gave me isn't good enough our next post is from me Lindsay me my the butthole for borrowing my roommates car to drive cross-country without telling him exactly where I went keeping it short I live with three people one guy two girls I'm a girl too the guy and I are good friends and we help each other with small favors from time to time we're all in university over spring break I told him I didn't know where to go yet because I didn't have a car he said he's going home to see family so I could use his car to drive to Spring Break up with friends I thought that was super nice as his car is very nice as well a Mercedes SUV so he goes home and I get my best friends together for a Spring Break road trip we end up driving to Las Vegas from Maryland which was a huge Drive but super fun when I get back my roommate asks how the trip was and I tell him and he freaks out he said he assumed we were just gonna drive to the beach or something like just a few hours away not almost to the west coast I told him he didn't say anything about distance when he leant the car to me and it's unfair to get mad at me when he didn't bother to say anything we've been fighting since but my other roommates think I should apologize I don't think I did anything wrong however but open to other judgment so actually I did the math on this driving a car causes wear and tear which increases maintenance costs and decreases the value of the car according to it still runs calm the wear and tear cost for an SUV is 33 cents per mile if you multiply that by a 2442 mile trip from Maryland to Vegas you gets eight hundred and twenty two dollars multiply that by two for a round trip and that small favor cost that roommate about one thousand six hundred and forty-four dollars in maintenance cost and depreciated car value and Opie honestly wants to know am i the butthole how our next post is from zexif exif hi guys looking for a new job opportunity 70 K a year weekends off I have five holidays this year a few festivals and want to be done by 3:00 p.m. every day apart from Fridays I want to finish at 12 on Fridays DM me thank you when choosing beggars say hey do you mind if I crash at your place for just a little while while I look for a new job I think this is what they mean by look for a new job our next post is from spirited desk hey utilities from last month were 70 bucks and still have to be paid to the apartment people do you need me to do another rent breakdown I know you said you weren't going to pay utilities in your email and I don't know what that means I'm not going to pay the $100 for the one you just sent me until we figure it out but I didn't know I still owed 70 bucks sorry no worries hey just a friendly reminder you still owe utilities and I don't want to get a past-due from the landlords when we are trying to lower the bill for this month yeah I'm sorry I'm waiting to get paid I don't have enough I greatly appreciate if you were mindful of paying utilities on the date they are due which is the same every month the first and planning accordingly I send you the bill every time I get it and this is the second time this has happened in the last three months and I don't like having to text you about paying bills yeah my bad that me and my family isn't rich and I had to help my mom with the water bill because your landlord just shut it off you're right I'll just let her go without water next time Taylor I pay all my own bills and work my butt off all I am asking is you plan and pay your bills so my credit score isn't affected not that much to ask you do understand it's frustrating to watch you buy multiple bottles of alcohol over the weekend and leave the price stickers on eat out multiple times a week and by unnecessary plants when utilities are due I manage my money budget and eat out once a week so that I pay my bills in full and on time I suggest you do the same and stop making excuses whoa I shouldn't even dignify that garbage with an answer I found out Monday night that she needed help but of course you wouldn't understand with your rich family and all your fake patients and family homes everywhere we have two similar stories from users down in the comments I had a roommate who I gave 150 dollars to to pay my portion of the bills and he used that to pay part of his part of the rent the electric bill went unpaid for months without my knowledge and when we got the power shut off notice he asked me to help pay the $100 in late fees and reconnection fee and shipping for the past due amount which was over $500 at this point and I had given him money for same deal with the gas bill which was lower but the same BS and another post from rambling ater I once knew these three people sharing a house two of them would give their rent and bill money to one guy and he would lie and say he was paying the bills but he would actually only pay the most bare minimum amount allowed in order not to have anything shut off and he'd pocket the rest after several months this caught up to him when the services one of the rest of their money and he had to go to his roommates and ask for money they were so angry they moved out immediately sticking him with the bills he was eventually evicted and spent several weeks sleeping in a tent on the beach that was our slash using beggars and this is our slash puppy bloopers John with me unless I apologize for being so in unless unless I apologize for you go unless I apologize for you go what do you want unless I apologize unless I apologize for being what do you once unless I about unless unless what are cutie patootie do you want boots I'm unless unless I apologize what do you need from me unless I know unless I apologize unless I apologize for being so unless I apologize for being you go I think you need to apologize for being so inconsiderate huh where's my apology huh pooch where's my apology wha

Channel: rSlash

Views: 912,249

Rating: 4.9191079 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, choosingbeggars, beggar, r/choosingbeggars, choosing beggar, choosing

Id: ZKkBSfv88sk

Length: 16min 7sec (967 seconds)

Published: Fri May 03 2019