r/Askreddit "How Did You Survive Attempted Murder?"

welcome to our /s credit where people answer the question people who have survived an attempted murder what is your story I had a girl cut my brake lines on my car didn't know until we checked the camera from the apartment complex luckily she cuts straight through them versus slitting them when I attempted to crank the car the brake pedal went straight to the floor and I immediately knew something was wrong don't leave us hanging ding it what happened to her I don't remember what the initial charges were she was charged with destruction of property and had to attend mandated counseling for 12 months from reddit users aisle 79 a neighbor stabbed me in the chest because I hit him over the head twice with a 10-pound weight to try to stop him stabbing his wife however I'm fat and the knife didn't go deep enough through my breast tissue to do any damages yay for being fat he's still up for attempted murder though joke's on you nice guy I've been training for this moment for decades our next answer from spaz monkey my sister's adopted brother it's complicated had his throat slit by a hitchhiker and was kicked out of the car and left for dead on a country road luckily no arteries were hit he tied a t-shirt around his throat and managed to walk / crawl to a farmhouse to get help and survived they caught the guy and he went to jail new scar and a husky voice was the outcome wow that's actually horrifying that's like horror movie situation our next answer from soft puffs my mom attempted to murder me and my sister when we were younger she was going through a psychotic episode and was pretty suicidal and I said the wrong thing that set her off she chased us down to the basement with a knife we ran into my room and my sister hid in the closet while I tried to fight my mom off at the door she was trying to push it open while I was trying to push it closed it was a back-and-forth struggle until she put her hand in I think she was trying to engage my non-violence because she thought I wouldn't shut the door on her hand but I slammed the door over and over again until her fingers broke meanwhile my dad who was in the house finally came downstairs to check in and what was happening mind you this all happened very fast and my dad has a habit of zoning out when my mom gets in her episodes he ended up pulling her off the door and my sister and I ran out of the house and jumped in our van he drove around the corner and turned off the lights and we all ducked down in our seats to hide and stay there and tell my dad saw her drive our other car off and then a reply please tell me this had consequences for your mother Opie replied I truly wish it did she never told anyone about the attempted murder and afterward it became something that she said she couldn't remember and blacked out during I never told my other siblings they were older and out of the house already in the sister who hid in the closet and I rarely discuss it my sister was able to largely avoid psychological trauma due to not seeing most of it but obviously since I was face to face with it I am a little messed up teapot Mountain replied I'm so sorry to read this do you still have contact is it possible for you to get away from her at least a bit hope he says I tried repeatedly to go no contact growing up and had lots of issues pressure from outside family her being insane and manipulative and showing up outside of my dad's house and popping up in the windows to trap me etc but I moved across the country about two years ago and was finally able to go completely no contact about four months ago the distance helps tremendously our next reply from Dan bagged two and three I delivered a pizza to a house just outside of the city on the way back I stopped to help a car that pulled over in front of me with there hazard lights on I pulled up beside them and thought it was weird that nobody rolled down the window or made any kind of contact with me for around 15 seconds the passenger then jumped out of his side of the car yelling that they needed help as he made his way toward my car I thought something was weird about this as I started to pull away before he could get to my passenger door he began shooting at me I ducked my head after the first shot entered through the back window and embedded in my passenger seat headrest another shot entered through the rear window while the other three only hit the outside metal parts of my car he missed altogether with another shot I remember being sure I was about to die as he fired more shots at me I was very surprised that I wasn't panicky it was just like oh I guess this is it turns out it was a plot to rob me the pizza was ordered and the guys were stationed down the road to intercept me they knew who I was and they knew that I would be able to recognize them as I delivered a few orders to them before the guy wasn't wearing anything to cover his identity which leads me to believe that he would have shot and killed me if he would have made it inside my car by the next morning they had all been arrested the shooter was found guilty of attempted murder and sentenced to 40 years in prison he later appealed that sentencing because there was a word wrong in the jury instructions he won the appeal and ended up being sentenced to 10 years and was released November of 2010 after five years the remaining five years were to be served as parole and probation he was arrested twice for parole slash probation violation when he was only a couple months away from total freedom I laughed man reading this story about pizza is kind of making me hungry I would totally kill for a slice of pizza right now our next reply is from fearless lingonberry I had just bought a full sheet of acid this was 20 years ago sorry FBI and I went over to where my friend was living with a bunch of roommates to share the wealth I knew most of the people he live with but there was one guy staying there who I hadn't met before I basically handed out however many doses people were tough enough to take at once including three or four hits to the new guy we came to find out pretty quickly that new guy had never taken LSD before okay no problem he's at home he's surrounded by people he knows except me he can just chill and have a good time we wanted to watch a movie so we landed on the Brady Bunch movie which is super trippy by the way everything is going good we all start peaking and we're laughing and having a good time and then on the movie the little girl Cindy is getting advice from our dad and says but I don't want to be a snitch new guy stands up and roars is that what you think you think of an effing snitch we all try to calm him down explain to him that it's a line from the movie we even rewind the movie so we can watch that part again but nothing is working he's tripping too hard to reason with and he's convinced that were accusing him of being a snitch then he starts pacing back and forth back and forth muttering this is the kind of stuff that makes mother f first kill this is the kind of stuff that makes mother effers kill over and over great he zeroed in on me I'm sure because he didn't know me and he's still pacing back and forth and muttering but now he's giving me a death glare while he does it I'm getting pretty uncomfortable obviously and I'm also peeking from like 10 hits of acid so my ability to cope with the situation is pretty low I stand up because well there's a guy I don't know pacing around behind me muttering about killing people and I don't want my back to this dude this would be a really intense situation even if I wasn't tripping balls but the acid it clearly doesn't help suddenly he pulls out a huge hunting knife lunges at me and tries to stab me I dodged him then he made another try but by that time his friends had jumped up and were holding him back he's struggling to break free and screaming you think I'm an effing snitch i laughing kill you and i took the opportunity to bop right out the door I was about a half-mile from my house but it took me about two hours to find because I was tripping so hard and I kept getting lost in my own neighborhood addendum he was in fact a snitch and the whole house got raided a few weeks later a bunch of the guys who lived there got arrested for drugs although my friend had moved out by that point so luckily he wasn't one of them and then a reply great story glad you didn't get hurt and f that guy do you think he was really unstable or maybe he thought he'd get a light sentence for being an informant hope he says I think both he did get away without being charged because he informed on his roommates but he also was really unstable and genuinely couldn't deal with the LSD people's first time taking LSD is always interesting because it amplifies however you're already feeling and people tend not to realize that because it's not really something that LSD has a reputation for I'm guessing he was probably feeling really guilty about informing on his friends and it pushed him over the edge then the reply imagine how he'd feel being a murderer then Opie says I actually know someone else who did that he and his friend were both taking acid and he got paranoid and murdered his friend he doesn't even remember doing it just coming to his senses and his friend was dead and he was covered in blood the parents of the guy he murdered were incredibly compassionate and asked for leniency during a sentencing their perspective was that it was a tragedy and there was no reason to ruin two lives because of it so he only ended up spending a few years in prison and now he's part of a program that goes around to high schools and talks to kids about drugs and alcohol at this point what I really want to know is Opie do you still do LSD because if so you're either the bravest or the dumbest person I've ever heard of our next replies from i ginger a little bit of background here we use telegram to buy drugs we have this big group with lots of dealers very sorted very handy so I just got home from college and parked my car on the street it was about 11:00 p.m. and I was just sitting and browsing my phone at some point I got into telegram and read some work-related messages when suddenly a guy opens the passenger door and tries to get in I'm trying to push him out and he's like Shh you better not and points the driver's window where another guy was standing pointing a gun at me he gets into the car and from the back another guy comes in so now there's three of them one on the passenger seat one by the driver's window which by now opens a door and putting the gun to my head and another who was sitting in the back and was pointing a knife to my neck at first I got really confused and I was like what the f guys the guy next to me started talking about money I owe them and started searching my car I told them they're mistaken and he was like I saw you browsing telegrams so don't mess with me at that point for some reason I got really calm as I do not do drugs and don't owe anybody money I tried to explain that I was just reading work messages but the guy with the gun got really mad and hit me with the gun he tried to pull me out and the dude next to me stopped him and said there's an easy way to check so he took my phone and started going through everything at some point he got into my messages with my mom my little sister he was checking where I work he got into the gallery and found pictures of my dog and that's when I worried the most he said to his friends look how cute his dog is ain't it you love your dog don't you and I didn't reply few minutes later and he finds nothing then he explains to me that they supplied some guy four thousand dollars worth of weed and he never paid next he says sorry and they're off those are surprisingly understanding drug dealers what our next reply is from a outdid myself my parents moved to Mozambique during the mid 90s I was around 8 at the time and started going to school there a nice private one can't complain my father was working for Red Cross in chamoy so we had a comfortable life one day before arriving to school with a friend of mine sketchy guys stopped us offered a whole bunch of money to just take some small box to a white band that was parked at the end of the street not even a hundred meters away my lucky day I guessed it actually was but for different reasons when I was going to grab the box my friend grabbed me by the shirt pushed me and started running screaming something I don't understand in Shona the local dialect that moment was when it clicked the moment I looked back the guy had already vanished so wherever you are thank you - I will never forget you then someone replied man was he trying to kidnap you and Opie says organ traffic and King Abdul says trust me this stuff is real I spent ten years of my life in Nigeria actually I was born there it ain't uncommon to see corpses on the floor missing some vital organ sometimes head private parts fingers and toes it's really scary and then smelly job' says I worked with Nigerians on ships for a while and I really am curious how common dick magic is it seemed everyone had a tale of how they or a friend or a friend of a friend witnessed someone having their dick stolen by black magic the story was generally a variation of someone gets touched on the shoulder in public by someone who via black magic steals their dick but they catch the dick thief and demand return of the dick they then demand a woman with whom to test that the returned dick is the correct one and still fully functional hahaha what I want to know is all those witches out there what do they do with all those extra dicks our next replies from Victor one one seven I've posted this story already a long while back but basically I worked in a jail and a guy from a one-percenter biker gang tried to pay $10,000 to have me killed because he somehow got the idea that I was the Fed who busted him and was merely pretending to be a jailer so I could spy on him don't do math care the guy was bragging about it and one of the other inmates who I had saved from a heart attack with first aid didn't like that so he beat the living bejesus out of the guy and then told me about it phone call recordings confirmed that he had promised them money to two guys if they shot me in the back of the head while escorting him to court and busted him out federal marshals rolled them up and on his way to court I whispered to him your friends won't be joining us when we got to the planned ambush point instead of a bond hearing he got charged for trying to have me murdered and organizing an escape then raging waffles asks did the inmate who informed you on the potential killer get any reward Opie responds he was in for drug issues I got him enrolled in a treatment program and the county attorney agreed to drop other charges that weren't drug-related in order for him to attend I would have loved to have seen that guy's face after you made that whisper our next reply is from Oh Toki it wasn't me but my uncle when I was a kid around a decade ago my uncle got shot while coming out of a bar with a few friends his friend got hit once in his shoulder but was fine my uncle on the other got hit three times once in the colon lung and heart by all rights the shooter had gotten him and drove away his friend rushed him to the hospital and with a bullet lodged in his heart and blood entering his lung he managed to survive he was in a lot of pain for a long time but since then he's gotten his life together and is getting married in about a year Alamo says Wow did they ever catch the guy who did it no he never left his car and in the chaos of things nobody got his plate they put out a search warrant for the car but nothing meaningful turned up since they didn't have enough info my uncle thought that maybe it was his dealer but he never mentioned that since he didn't want to get busted for drug usage I never got many details since I was pretty young but my best guess is that my uncle was pretty heavily in debt to his dealer and a hit was ordered on him he was never involved with any gang so I don't think it was that our next reply is from say quietly my brother is a drug addict and he held my dad and I hostage saying he was going to kill us after he pulled out a gun he fired it at the ceiling at first to show us it was a real gun and my mom was by their front door and able to run out I wasn't 100% sure he noticed I was still inside so I had to run in to the only room that locked which was the bathroom and hid behind the toilet I eventually let him know my location by begging him to let us go and we wouldn't call the police he said he dragged me out by the hair and shooting me first if my dad didn't give him any money eventually my dad convinced him there was money in the basement that my mom had hidden and I ran out the front door it was a single-level house my mom was on the phone with the police from a neighbor's house what was scariest is that we were in a pretty rural area that had turkey hunting in the woods behind us I heard a shot from the woods and assumed it was my brother murdering my dad I had lived in a lot of fear up until that point anyway because my brother was generally violent and scary took me a long time to be healthy again I'm kind of a small person but I still manage to lose a ton of weight and still haven't been able to sleep well it's been almost 13 years my parents wouldn't let me tell the truth on the police report so I didn't write anything out or sign anything my brother wonders now why I can't look at him or why he couldn't hug me on my wedding day man o P that sounds rough it sounds like your parents were enabling your brother while putting your life and theirs at risk that was our slash S credit and my R / s credit question for you is why haven't you subscribed yet

Channel: rSlash

Views: 1,176,359

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, askreddit posts, funny askreddit, ask reddit, askreddit, r/askreddit, askreddit top posts, askreddit funny, askreddit question, murder, murderer

Id: jur_Sn9ZWts

Length: 19min 13sec (1153 seconds)

Published: Wed Jul 17 2019