-Alright.
We're checking out the only game where the only cure for alcoholism
is a reverse lobotomy. It's Happy Wheels. So, um, this doesn't look good. So, there's apparently
an entire board down here in hell. I have to get there. I want to know. Oh, I was a legend
for literally one second. A sleepy cat. Okay. What a new?
Wow. I'm doing great here. [screams] Okay, let's try and not do that. I see there's a win over here too. I just don't know what it does. Wow.
So wait, I got two bad days in a row. Does that like
cancel each other out? Yeah. All right. I got one of the wins. What the hell is a 2/5 shout-out? Do I need to get like all five chunks
to get a full shout-out? There's one shout-out that's 100/100. Does it just mean you scream louder
while you're shouting me out? Oh, yes. Land it here. You got it. I'm glad I managed to land in an area that
completely decides that physics sucks. Oh, I'm a pro noob, and I'm okay. How is this just okay? Look at this. I want my pathway to hell, damn it. Ow. No, I don't want to win anymore. I mean, I do want to win,
but not that way. Where's the secret? Where is it? Whenever I start to get angry, I turn into Batman
in the Dark Knight Rises. Drug seller. Great. What the hell am I standing on
down here? I won, died, and got this again all in one shot. Oh, I mean, I guess I did try my best. Boop. Hey. Oh, a later win. What the hell? Oh, whoa, whoa. Press space to hold on. To what? The alcohol? Oh, hell. Uh, you know what? Let's, yeah, sure.
We'll hold on this way. Click to win. Okay. Ah. Ow. My little alcohol cart
is running me over. Oh, yes. This is called cave monster. Great. The cave monster
likes to vomit fluorescent spinach. Also, this rat is really big. All right.
See what kind of cave monster. Oh. Oh, the cave monster
is like legitimately following me. Does he do anything or does-- [groans] He was already dead.
That's not a murder going-- Oh, whoa. What the hell?
Is that like a tentacle pool? Uh, nope. Oh, wow. How the hell
are you supposed to get past this? Ah, that's tentacling me. Stop it. [groans] Oh, I did it.
I got past the pool of blood. I actually need this tentacle
to help me get out. Whoop. Thank you. Okay, slow. Oh, a bottle of alcohol. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. Moving, whoa ouch. Great. I just got my spinal column removed
by an angry squid. All right,
we're moving right through this, past the monster. Oh my God. My feet. All right. Let's try
and not lose our feet this time. Oh, if I don't beat the monster,
I actually get stuck in here forever. They're a real pain in the ass. All right. Get chased, get chased. Ow. Right. Don't lose my feet.
Run over the head, and then yeet us over the tentacles. Uh, good. And now don't listen to slow. Whoop through there. Got it. Over the, whatever the hell that was. It looked like something from mer-- What the hell? Oh, my God it's got a-
[chuckles] it's got a health bar. It's also possible.
It's not roaring at me. Maybe it's just saying hi. How the hell? How do you get past
the little- the little feely guys? [laughs] What do you do? Oh, they're so defensive. Um. Oh, man, that was my best jump. All right. New-new plan. Oh, my ass. Oh, they're cut-- [chuckles] Woo. There. All right. Ride them, cowboy. [laughs] Oh. Oh, oh, I got one. I didn't know
you could like beat them up. Uh, whoa. All right,
there's a problem because I-- Crap, I only have one arm left. Come on, Nixon.
Damn it. Ah. [laughs] [groans] I'll take you on with no arms. All right, I probably need arms. This is a hell of a board. And it's like a- it's like
a full combat system and everything. Go. First shot. look at that. We're here, and then jump. All right.
Now, we have to defeat these. So, [groans] get wrecked. Ah, ow. All right, I guess I do-- Maybe I do have to do it
like hand-to-hand style or something. I don't know. Crap, I just lost a foot. Ow, there goes my other foot. Well, looks like I'm doing a hand-to-hand
no matter whether I like it or not. Come on baby. Oh, yeah, there's one.
There's two. Hell, yes. I will beat you to death
with my own foot. [screams] Okay. [groans] All I needed was one arm. Go. Come on, Nixon. Crawl. Crawl to victory. Yes. That was amazing. This is called survival part two. Hello everyone who survived. The next game is a spike fall. Okay. Oh, looks like
there's something hidden back here. Out of the way old man. I'm the only one who gets to enjoy hell
at this time of year. Yeet. And down the little hole
we have a sad death. All right,
guess I'm doing the spike fall. Kinda weird because I'm--
Oh, oh, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa. Uh, he's fine. Okay. Good job. Now do the bottle run. Okay, sure. All right. Okay. Now do- ruh. What the hell?
Red light, green light, uh, uh, uh, uh. Why? I did it. I won. See? The best way to beat red light,
green light is just to never stop. This is called the mountain of neon. You have to slide down the mountain
of neon without exploding or something. That's literally what it said.
All right. Let's go here and down this. Oh, we got a cave. Okay. Oh, yeah.
Oh this is- this is perfect. We are sliding. All right, Nixon,
I need you to go head first here, otherwise, this is going to be
very difficult for both of us. Here we are. All right. Or you can just go ass first too,
that's fine. I love how he never listens to me. Oh yeah, oh, we're-we're-we're
penetrating the hole real good. Yeah, yeah, that's good. Yeah, just like that. There we are. Nice little back massage. -I'm probably losing most of the skin
-No, God, -on my ass, but that is okay.
-please, no. -I wasn't really doing very much anyway. And down the hill. Oh, yeah. Oh, this is- this is actually
quite, uh, quite satisfying to watch. [mimics] Ow, angry Doritos up the ass. Uh, warning stalagtites. Oh, okay. Do they fall or? Oh, oh, God. [groans] I've got every single stalagtite,
oh, except for one. Are you serious right now? All right, we're doing this full speed. Go. Ow. And then keep going. Uh, I don't know
why my arm decided it wanted- it didn't want
to participate any longer. All right. Okay.
Now, I'll hop over this. Yeet. Yeah. One arm is all I need. After all, I-I beat the-the cave creature
with, you know, one arm and no legs. Perfect. Inside of the cannon. Okay. Not really sure
where this is supposed to send me. And, oh, [groans] ow. I won. [laughs] Oh, thank God.
I knew I had legs for a reason. Oh, and I'm still wearing my helmet. This is called
the GSP Stairway to Hell. Although, what do we have down here? Oh, there's nothing. Y'all gotta start
putting some stuff back over there. Oh, okay, all right. Kind of here-- Oh, what the hell. There goes my son. -Wow, whoo.
-Oh, my God. -[groans] Oh, my leg made it. Okay, I think I can cheat most of this.
Hold on. Right, right. And, whoop. And [laughs] got it.
Survive the mine. I think I'm not going
to survive the mine. Oh, maybe I will. [groans] I love how this guy,
like I gave him a pineapple to eat, and he's like,
"No, I'm a carnivore." How the hell? Come here chair. Help a brother out. [groans] I mean I'm still alive
for like the next couple of seconds. Now, I'm dead.
Okay, I need this man. Come here. Come here. I need you. Oh, hell. Please, come to my rescue. [groans] Uh-uh. Okay, the chair is now protecting me. Surely, this won't-- Ha-ha, it was all about timing. Why are you pooping out
your own fist? Actually, why is he like slowly
trying to get to me and kill me? He's like, "You survived the mine. Now I must beat you
to death with this pineapple." This is called spike fall ice cave. That's actually pretty awesome. So, what do you do? Oh, what the hell are all these? Oh, oh my God. There's a hell of a spike fall. It is new and exciting
that I get to die to stalagtites instead of the normal spikes. What are these gigantic spheres? Like little eyes watching me as I fail. Apparently,
I need to go a little bit faster because this is-
we're not screwing around here. Oh yeah, never mind. Ow, real pain in my ass. Come on. Ah, oh, go. Oh, am I still alive? Ah, your board is,
uh, pretty difficult. I'm not gonna lie. Yeet. Oh, yeah.
We're doing this head first. I don't even care. Okay, now I care more. Oh. Oh. Like 90% of my body made it. All right, keep the ass muscles tight. Right, right about here. That's gotta be it, right there. Oh, yeah. I've died so many times. This is gonna be it. There it is. I told you. [laughs] The time has come for yet another instance
of the Squid Game. Also Il-nam peed himself again. Also there's spoilers here, everyone. So just an FYI, apparently. All right,
there's my little nightlight up there. The only thing that keeps all of us
from butchering each other at night. I'm actually a liar.
We just butcher each other anyway. Hurry up 64. Get to the first game. Okay. This map contains six games. Okay. Game one,
stop when it says red light. Go when it says green light. Okay. Red light. Is it? Oh, okay. Green light. Whoa. Okay, green light. Got it. I love the creature too, and the artwork is fantastic. Honeycomb run faster
than the falling shapes. Got it. Tug of war. Click the box to pull the rope. How does- how does it work? Do I have to get off my thing? All right. I gue- I don't know.
I guess I'm getting off my Segway. I feel like I've been lied to. Wait, Segway I need you. Ah. Ow. Oh, okay. I get it. It's like a click game. There we go. Got it. All right.
Game four marbles. Collect 10 coins,
but watch out for the mines. [chuckles] Okay. All right. Oh, I see the mines.
All right, here we go. I wish I could say I'm collecting
these marbles without violence, but I'm absolutely not collecting
these without violence. Oh, crap. I'm alive. Ah, get wrecked. I wish that my head wasn't up my ass. Like literally, damn it. Because my head keeps
going one up my ass, I can't get past that area. Okay. So the plan here is
I lost both of my legs. So now I won't be able
to have my head up my ass. Oh, but I'm also really light now. Hmm. Ah, I lived. All right. Okay, first marble. Come on. Second marble. There it is. There it-- Ah. Ow. All right. Flex. There we go. Okay, perfect. All right,
and now I have all my limbs. Now, I just need to not touch
any of these mines. They're everywhere. Up, no. God, the marbles is the hardest one. There we go.
No, no, no, no, no. Yes. Okay. There. Okay, and jump. Oh no, no, no. Ah, oh yeah. This is perfect so far. No, yes. Okay. Cool. Glass bridge. Some of the panels are tempered glass,
some are not. Try and pick the correct panels. Well, how the hell am I gonna know? Okay. So that's a real one. Oh my God, no. All right. Here's the plan.
We're going through this in one shot. Ready? Red light. Watch this. Ready? Ready for it.
Ready for it. Ready for it. Green light, go, bam. Through everything. Through here. Dodge the falling shapes. Upward, yeetus. Click on the box. Brrr. Hey, land it. Up, push through all the bodies. Coin, coin, coin, coin, jump. Got it. Coin. Okay. For this, just go, go. No. I will climb out. I don't care. I don't need my Segway. Yeah, what do you do
when this happens VIPs? What do you-- Oh hell.
Okay, the first one is good. The second one is it. So that means the third one is good, and this one is also good. And the last one is fake. Got it. Okay, cool.
Now the final one, the Squid Game, nothing is off limits. 45.6 billion won, boys. Uh, I don't have anything
to kill them with. Yeah, I did it. Yes. Finally. Well, I won the game, and now I get to spend
my 46 billion won on therapy. Anyway, folks, hope you enjoyed
this episode of happy wheels. Till next time, stay foxy, and much love.
