-Alright,
we're checking out the only game where you can penetrate a pumpkin
with alcoholism. It's Happy Wheels. Right of the bat, bad. I do appreciate that bad
is walled with not bad. There's a lot of-- Mmm. There's a lot of things here I want. Half of an Australian Man
wasn't really one of them. Hey, spooky yeet. Look, it's a seasonal style
of yeeting. Okay? Along with the epic.
Give me the bottles. I-I can't believe
I slid that in there. All the world needs is violence. I'm like three-fourths
of an Australian Man. I'm not sure which three-fourths I am
from the bottom- the bottom down. Oh, the spooky MLG shoutout
was almost there. I don't care what it takes. I want my damn shoutout. More than that, I want to know
what the hell a spooky shoutout is. Oh, you can be the King of Ballance
with two Ls. I got Baby and Not a Baby. I'm some sort of alien being
which makes total sense actually. Oh, it's a good yeet. I was almost there. Oh, trick or treat,
I got the Mega Yeet. I've not upgraded
to full Australian Man as well. Exciting. [grunts] Oh, I got the maximum amount
of penetration allowed. It was just sideways penetration. I haven't intentionally tried the Gray Will Find a Way
in a while as well. I think I want that too. It's gonna be a pain in the ass though
because the damn Good Yeet is in the way. I do kind of want some stuff
on the backboard as well. Oh, I touched the legend. And the legend wasn't having any of it.
[laughs] People be like, "What did it feel like
to touch the legend?" Felt like lies. [chuckles] What? I'm not gonna lie,
I'm pretty happy about that. That's still not
what I'm looking for though. Impossibly Great. This should be spelled G-R-A-Y-T. [laughs] Oh, yes. Now I'm touching the legend
for all eternity. [gasps] There it is. You said I would find a way. I found a way. [gasps] I-- Don't even ask. I don't know. Does this cover my shoutout? This is called Rope Swing Extreme. So grab the rope,
hit the Freeze Zone. Come down. Grab the toxic waste. Lose most of my balls and down. Beautiful.
Three seconds we're gonna grab. And grab, swing, flip. Damn it. Oh, I'm almost there.
Okay, this is tough but not impossible. Ugh. And whoop, grab, drop. Um, hmm, yeah, this is fine. Holy penis. And we have a winner. If there's one thing I love doing, it's licking the dysentery
off the finish line. This is called For Gray Improved. What's over here? Oh, little drop. Oh, you got a secret win, huh? Ahh, pooped out my lungs. All right. No secret win, just death. Uh, what the hell? How--? What in a--? Is there--? Do these like turn on
or something or--? Hold on. Oh, my god. [groans] Oh, okay. They are real. There we go. Ah, all right. And yeet. Okay, good. And whoop, nice. And then last one. "Rest for now. Get ready." Okay, get ready for what?
Does this move? Do I have to climb
on a bunch of black balls? [groans] Oh, yeah. Oh, this is- this is easy. Oh, yeah. Oh, god. [groans] Ha, ha. It's all in the calf muscles. You're gonna win this. I like the- I like it. Uh, someone's finally being positive
in a level instead of, you know, all that awaits you
is hell and disappointment. Okay, so we flip down here. Okay, all right. Cool. Now break the glass, okay. And bam. Oh, penis. I seriously almost broke my head. Nice and smooth through here. Perfect. And a little tuck and roll. And is there anything down there
or is it like just death? Ahh, you know what?
I'm not gonna take a chance. We're gonna go this way. [screams] That area lacks fairness. All right. Well, made a hell overboard here. Okay, very good. Lovely. Oh, oh, oh, oh. [laughs] Oh, not today Satan, haha. Here we go,
I am a professional ball juggler, look at this, look at that, all day. All right, let's um,
go a little bit further this time, a little like this and [laughs] that hurt. Okay, maybe I should've approached this
a little a bit slower like the last time, there we go. [grunts] perfect, all right,
don't get exploded by the glass. Whoo. Really? I feel like I was not prepared
for the amount of ass pain this freaking board has
in stored for you. I'll have freaking blood
in my stool after this. Oh, I'm so dead right now. Never mind, I'm totally fine. I wonder, hold on, can I get on top of this? Oh, yeah. Oh, so close. Hold on. Oh, no. Oh, oh, oh, oh God. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Yay. I'm just breaking the rest of this glass
so it doesn't, you know, instakill me like the last time. All right, well,
you don't want to go downward, um, hmm, and lean, I'm dead. Look at this, damn it, no. That was interesting. This is uh, it's tough. Oh, God, you're gonna. Oh, piss.
Please, please, head don't pop off, please don't pop off,
please don't pop off, thank you. That was the first time I had like
a full conversation with my own head. I have been kicked in the head
by my own dismembered-- Yeet. Oh, my God,
I don't know how I survived that. I was gonna say I've been kicked
in the head with my own dismembered feet so many times that
I have freaking brain damage. But this now is a new personal best. You got anymore
freaking landmines for me? Any of the land mines
you wanna try and shove in one of my unprepared orifices? Oh, it's just a big line so far,
there's nothing here. There has-- What the hell? There has got to be
a harpoon or something, I know there is. I didn't go through all that just
to go down one single line to the end. Come on, there's going to be
a hobo throwing a knife. What the hell is that? What is that? Why is there an ellipsis
on the screen? There's like a thumbnail hole? Do I have to balance
on each ellipsis? I don't want to go very fast
because I'm still waiting for a harpoon to just be sitting there
waiting to kill me. All right, not yet, no, no, no, no,
I want all. I want to see as much as possible. Okay, I'm not seeing anything,
so I'm just gonna go. No, yes. Oh, Jesus, I literally made it
by the skin of my teeth. You can tell because my teeth
are still on the finish line. This is called glass, you have to-- Mmm. Oh, this may be
very, very difficult. How the hell
are you supposed to win this? Oh, pi-- Oh, God. Oh. Um, all right, feet first. Yeah, there we go, perfect. All right, now grab. [groans] Oh, it's almost
the first heart to space. [grunts] Perfect. All right, go, go, go, go. I'm gonna use my legs
for protection. [laughs] Oh, my God. I guess-- I knew I kept that leg around
for a reason. The time has come
to jump to my death and now as I fall, I'm totally kidding, see,
everything is absolutely fine. A nice reach upward and somehow my leg
is caught on a panel. There we go, flippity doo downward
and yeetilydeet to the sky and slide down. There goes the helmet.
Oh, the helmet is safe. Okay, thank you. I like it.
This is a very elaborate don't move. Into the cannon, there's always a cannon
to rest my weary buttocks in so that it can fire me at incredible speeds
across the entirety of a board more than like to have me explode into a bunch of giblets. Oh, I won, I won all in one piece. This is incredible. This is-- Mmm. This is called GrayStillPlays
MultiRun impossible. What the hell
are you supposed to do? Oh, my God. [cries] Go. At least I get to see
where the end is. Or not. You certainly weren't kidding
when you said, impossible. [yells] [laughs] Oh, my God. My son, what happened? [yells] Oh, Tom, you're seriously
getting in the way, child. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. This is ridiculous. [laughs] [yells] [laughs]
Oh, my God. Oh, oh, oh no. Wow, even the meteorites fall. When you said impossible-- Oh, my God, no. Oh, God. You know what, just get over this. [yells] Yes. [laughs] Oh, my God. I thought I was dead. [laughs] This is called the hardest fall ever. It says, "If you win,
I will pay you $500." Can I fall back here? No. Oh, yes, I can. Ow. Uh-- Oh-- I won. I won. It says it right here. Please send $500
to local animal shelter. The kittens will thank you. This is called
you can't [yells] beat it. Oh, I'm alive. Now, I'm not. I feel like your board
may have a certain level of unfairness. [sobs] Guys, you're getting kind of crazy
with these boards. All right,
enough of the damn crossbows. Somehow, I have to use, like,
these-these hobos to protect me. Oh, whoa. Enough with the arrows. I am still alive. Never mind. Okay, I have an idea. Somehow-- Oh, my God,
I almost died just then. Somehow, I need to utilize the hobos
as a shield. Okay, that's perfect.
Oh, the hobo got rocketed in the air. It took out all of them. This just went from totally impossible
to totally possible now. [yells] Oh, don't crash on me, game. Don't you do it. [chuckles] You, ba-- You bastard. Oh. [groans] [laughs] I did it. [laughs] Yes. Yes. This is called Flutter-kick Gray.
What's down here? Oh, there's this-- Oh, there's--
Okay, there's a lot of boards. All right, well,
let's see what's over here. Yeet. Oh-- Okay, down. Mmm, my pieces. You know what,
let's do this one first, and flutter kick. [laughs] Real men drag their head
on the ground for the win. Right, so that's the second one. So, there's another one here. I'm assuming they go
in-in, like, you know-- Okay, yeah, so noob. The other one was amateur, and so-- Oh, I got both the wins. The last one, down here,
is the expert. Okay. So, go. Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, oh, no. Oh, it's right there.
You know what, let's get some extra- [chuckles] some extra speed. Oh, piss. Well, now I'm screwed. I don't know
if I can flutter kick this. Oh, I almost did.
I will be the flutter kick champion. All right, the last one is-- The last one is pretty difficult. If I can stop my head
from exploding up my neck. Crap, more speed, more speed. Oh, God. No. My son. And get there, get there. [screams] Ye-- [laughs] I won that by a literal thread. My front teeth saved my life, and that's why you should
brush your teeth every day. Welcome to Jetrun. Hard. After what I've been through. Okay, it's still pretty hard.
Is there anything back here? There is not. I was going to say
everyone I've been through-- Oh, yeah, oh, yeah,
this actually doesn't-- Oh, ho-ho-ho. Oh, I'm right there. It doesn't seem that bad. Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go,
go, go, go, go, go, go-- [yells] Oh, yeah. This is called Get to the End. All you have to do is get to the end, but the blades of Satan chase you down
and got it. This is called Ride Reginald. Reginald has to go to the store and pick up some beer. [chuckles] Oh, my god. Please, help me. Not today, good sir. Yoga class.
[chuckles] Kid's soccer game. Oh, my god, Reginald. [laughs] All right, we're at Target. Oh, beer and wine. All right, I gotta spend
a little extra time here and pick all that up. All right, now we can continue, Reginald.
All right, through the cheese. "Your total is [chuckles] $4.32." "The End.
You get to enjoy your bud lite now." Well, here we are yet again. I've gotta complete this squid game
but this time on a freaking wheelchair. All right, so, what do you do? Oh, you just have
to get over the shapes. Oh, my god, why? So, technically,
I wasn't using those legs anyway. All right, I've gotta-- There we go.
All right, now back this way and whoa, god. There we are. Sweet. And, oh my--
Okay, so this is like the tug of rope except it was a piece of glass
that almost killed me. This is the marbles.
Do you go down it or--? Oh, you go across it. Okay. Oh, piss. Please, please, please. No, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no. Crap. Uh, I think I can save this. Come on, hobo. To space. Yes. Elon Musk would be proud. Ow, my forehead. [groans]
Oh, this is unbelievably difficult. I shouldn't have
fallen down this area. There we go. Oh, yeah. Oh, piss. All right, you know what,
it's probably better that we start over. Here we go. Oh, god. Uh, don't break this.
Don't break it. Don't break it. Good. Coin and yeet and over. Beautiful. All right,
so now go straight through this. Oh, no. No. Ah, ah, ah, oh sweet baby Jesus. Yeah. No, yeah, god,
I missed a couple of the coins. Come on. Come on. There it is. Now, with all those coins, I have enough money to go buy a 50-piece
spicy chicken nugget over at Wendy's. All right, folks. Hope you enjoyed
this episode of Happy Wheels. Till the next time.
Stay foxy and much love.
