(Placing in VHS and turning on television) Is it... is it on? Oh! good! Okay. Its working. It's hard to know with this old technology sometimes. Welcome to Ode to A Moon! A very, very beautiful looking (inhale) little horror game. Well, is it horror? I dunno. Let's find out, shall we? (Inhale) The visuals are very pretty, the colors are lovely and it has this really sweet little TV effect going on, and so lets get in and play. Woah! Blade runner VHS Now, a VHS is what mommy and daddy used to watch all of their, Pop-culture on. Man this is fantastic. Ah, there it is. I literally only wanted to play this because of a GIF I saw showing some of the visuals. I'm sure the game is great, but the visuals alone really sold me on it. Music by "Hello Meteor." Not to be confused with music by Hello Kitty. "ColorFiction." I'll keep an eye on you "ColorFiction." "Manhattan, October 1986." Your boy wasn't even born by then. Awe mannn, look at this! Holy shit! See games don't have to be hyper realistic. You can have an extremely stylistic game. A and click? What? Uhm. "It's been pouring all night." "I should quit at some point." "I need to unpack later." Can go to sleep. "Fun night?" I dunno. Awe man, this music! (Inhale) "Notes from yesterday's meeting:" "1. Take 4:25 train to Ashfield," Uh. "Document the eclipse from a scenic vantage point"' Okay so, Ode to a Moon, it's an eclipse story. "The 'old' Farview castle might be a good spot ." "3. Interview First Selectman," "About the history behind Ashfield's Ode to a Moon festival, and this year's concurrence with the eclipse." Fair enough. "Everything half boxed and there you are.." Uhh, excuse me? "2:11 PM." Man I am SHORT. In the game! In real life I'm super tall. "Glad I washed these before leaving." "Love having a view and tons of sun. Last place was a dungeon. Wait, okay.. Can I sit? Oh! B and A as in a controller! I thought you meant like, A on my keyboard. And I was like, "But thats to turn left!" Strafe left. "Nope, late as I am there's no time for a nap." Ooh, I get to go outside now. WHAAAT THE FUCK?! What was that??? (2x) AHAHA! I was literally saying that, I wasn't reading the subtitles that was just me exclaiming. Oh MAN this is cool! Hello everybody it's me, a tiny child. Jeez, I am in LOVE with this aesthetic. There it is! "Look at that full moon! If my timing is correct I'll get to the summit right as the eclipse starts." But its, 8 PM! Isn't it? (Clapping) OHHH man this is cool! Looks so good! Uhhh what? (Giggle) Am I in like a dimensional rift?! What is happening? I'm assuming I'm trying to go that way, but.. "Shit, I better stay away." Man the atmosphere. This game is drenched in it. There's a bird following me apparently. For some reason I'm getting like Stephen King vibes from this. Is that the train leaving? Wait- whats.. that showing up. "Gosh that was scary." Oh, (Giggle) It was. Shit my pants a little. WOHOHOHOAAH NATURE AT NIGHTTIME OUTSIDE IS VERY LOUD. Look at the colors. Am I still going the right way? Oh, this looks important. Yesss. COME ON, man! Wait, How can we see an eclipse at nighttime? Is it a Lunar eclipse then? Then not a total solar eclipse. Damn. Woahh. Are we in like, Colorado or something? This does not seem like a safe place to be. Oh baby.. Its like a giant eye blinking. Pfft- WOHOHOAH. Holyyy CRAPP. That looks amazing! Oh- the walls are crawlin'. Don't you hate when that happens? You're tryna' be out here looking at an eclipse and the walls just start crawlin' and floatin' all around ya? (Uncomfortable giggle) I feel like I'm being BIRTHED. OH JESUS. D-did the moon explode?! What the hell is happening??? What the hap is hellening??? OHOOOH We're going UP. We're going up into the torment. Chunks of castle or chunks of moon? You decide. I like to think, chunks of moon. Is this completely disorienting to watch? 'Cause it's completely disorienting to play. Okay who spiked my drink What did I just play?? What just happened to me?? Did I die? That was so bizarre. I have no idea what that game was about, what I was doing, no idea where I was going But I loved every second of it. I would love an entire game that looks like that. Not just like a lil' demo, not just like a little short story piece or whatever But just an entire gam- I don't know who was at the door at the end. Maybe my dad, maybe it was me. Heading out, For a night of partying. I don't know. Over all, that was phenomenal and I am really glad played it- (VHS removal.) Welcome to the tube Now not the British London underground system And not MyTube YouTube welcome to YouTube your on this platform right now This is like a horror game called Tube uhm It uh kind of reminds me of vanish actually W A S D to move Shift to sprint Left mouse button to shoot R to reload and E to use ok Simple SIMple pimple in ohh YEAH ........ Gimme that bad boy Press E to use Holy donut hahahaha we have a jesussss.........thing What did I just eat it looked like a wet sock filled with meat That's what most humans actually look like Ok I cant aim down sights or anything hooo I'm glad I'm in the sewers I'm glad I'm in the garbage were I belong I should never be let above the surface I should always have to stay down here amongst the filth I don't know what the plot of this is And I don't know why I keep getting holy donuts because this Is not a donut it's a wet soggy disgusting sewer donut Did I just pick up a soggy sewer donut is that what I'm eating That's fucking gross man Maybe it's just like a slenderman situation instead of collecting eight pages I have to collect a venereal disease ugh sweet god ugh you sound like your going to throw up your entire lunch And we had chicken pikaha whaaaaaaaa da fuck Did he just materialize he's got a giant cleaver oh sparky I don't think were in Kansas anymore alright Butthole meet shotgun ha haa jeez he's swinging like a madman (shot) I'll have you know (shot) I play apex (shot) oh god oh god I cant do anything he's much faster in the goop then I am. (shot shot shot) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh I can't I can't I can't I can Ok just keep reloading all you have to do is go to the side ahh Jesus. He's so close oh god. Uhah what are you I think I'm eating pieces of you as I go along. (gagging) I don't like this game this game is going to make me throw up (gagging) I'm gonna do it (gagging) I'm gonna do it (gagging) ohhh another one ok I'm just going to get as many shots into you as I can right now ahhh I am gonzo gone with the wind Gorgonzola cheese oh god (shooting) oh god ohh look at him go you look like something that would come out of my ass after Mexican food Shit is what I'm saying, he looks like shit. Thankfully I have had eleven sewer donuts by now. So anything you could do to me on the outside is nothing compared to the damage I have done to my inside's already. The real the real treat going on down there. Ok ok maybe we can snake this way- Why does the water keep going up and down? People just flushing their toilets all at once? When the water goes down, if it will go down. Okay screw it just start shooting, shoot first ask questions later. Okay I am out I am out I am out ahhhhh he's right behind me! ohh ahhhh ohh son of a bitch How many does it take I'm not keeping count I really should start keeping count ok let's see One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Seven so it takes like nine to kill them just sprint just I shut off the light idiot Ok get a couple in Ok he's not chasing me anymore hahaa I even down to a fine science Oh God Ok It takes many more shot's to kill this guy but I probably missed him with all the first one's I had to put more bullet's in him than burger's in my body over the years And that's a lot of bullet's I need a holy donut I need a holy soggy boy I need a soggy slopster Just a real wet one just a real gross Liquid shit filled donut oh god there's two of them There's two of them ohou ok ok now is the times for the runsies Do what your bowels have been doing all along the runs Fuck he's fast fuck he's fast noooooooo Do I have to start over Oh you mother fucker I am a sewer baby you are a sewer baby were all sewer baby's sewer sewer sewer baby's Welcome to the sewer baby club There's sewer off is last time (chuckles) that was supposed to sound like fewer. Didn't really sound like fewer, did it? Sewer and Fewer. Similar sounds, but different starts Oh, oh yeah, oh yeah (slurping sound) (orgasming sound) oh give it to me! What if I'm just a plumber? What if this is like intense Mario? He's actually doing his plumbing job for the first time, which is ridding the pipes
