-All right. We're checking out the only game
where you can eventually become the father of an entire legion
of murderous, crime-loving axolotls. Yeet. It's Minecraft. I have decided that I am going to
become a father today. I know Reginald is like,
"What about me?" You're going to have brothers. So, over here, this sad drooling being
is my infant axolotl, Deborah. So, effectively, I have the ability to
transform any fish into an axolotl, and then as time goes by,
they will grow up. I know that behind me, there is an entire landscape
that appears somewhat unusual. Don't worry about that. That's just Greystone place testing. So, first things first, um, there are
multiple stages of growth for these axolotls to the point
where the zeros get way out of hand. You'll understand in a little bit. This is the I like sugar stage as
you can see from this thing, darting all over the place. All right. So, first things first, we need to get
a whole legion of these and these. And this-- [laughs] I thought Deborah
was gonna jump to her death. I was gonna say,
"And this right here looks perfect." I know right now, Deborah is like,
"What are you doing, Dad?" Deborah, I'm going to teach you that everything in Minecraft
begins with deforestation. All right, a bit of this. Okay. We can begin. I'm not gonna lie. I kinda love that the baby axolotls
just bring an entire legion of drool with them no matter where they go. Okay. So, the magic here is cobblestone. It's what a growing fish needs
to become an axolotl. Okay. I would like to get at least
two axolotl children in before they get into their teenage years. Get that ready. All right. Baker's dozen. That should be good enough. Now we just need to find more fish. Ah, perfect. Worry not, you sad little fish sticks. I'm gonna make you better. Come here. Stronger. Hitting them is kind of a pain
in the ass though. There we go. Oh, yeah. Ah, rain death upon the cod. Good thing I brought all
these cobblestone. Pain in my-- There we go. Oh, yeah. Come here. You know you want this. Good. Good. Oh, yeah. Okay. [laughs] Oh, this is amazing. Look at all the drool. [laughs] All right, kids. It's time to take you shopping. Let us go find our first city. I need to teach them exactly what
is most important in life, murder. All right, kids. See this pig. He's different. Kill him. Kill him. Eat his pig flesh. Excellent. Sheep, death. Horse, actually. I like horses, but here's another
pig you can eat. There you go,
and it's so ravenous. I gotta keep feeding them the blood of
the innocent in order for them to grow up. So, they looks like they still
need to eat more. It was a whole pack of turtles. Feast, my children. Yes. Feast. [laughs] All right. Here's a whole bunch of sheep. Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill. Yes. One last sheep. Okay. Here we go. You can see they've started to walk. They're like toddler axolotls now. Now, of course, every level, they gain more abilities and
gives me more buffs. All right. So, we need to keep feeding them,
obviously, although real quick. There's some flint. Oh, yeah. Oh. It's so good that they grew up. We're swimming real good now. Ah, perfect. It's actually kinda good too
because I'm starving. I swear to God,
this place better have carbs. My kids don't eat carbs though. They're carnivores. Oh, what the hell? I appreciate that they've learned
how to shoot arrows. They-- I didn't even make
them kill that cow. They're just slaying everything
on their own now. Oh, why you coming after me? I didn't touch you. Also, he's not edible. Ooh. It's a Reginald statue. [laughs] Kill the townsfolk. Kill the townsfolk. The townsfolk are still edible. I am not going to have a problem
with getting these kids upgraded because they are eating now
without my help. See, in the beginning,
you have to feed your children. Pretty soon though,
they just eat everything. God, not the donkeys. Donkey is so chewy. Woo. They're spawning entire shipwrecks. [laughs]
Do you kids feel at home now? Olivia is like, "We're kinda tired
because we ended up just committing absolute atrocities
across the entire village. Everything in here is dead,"
except for me and my axolotl children. Oh, sweet bread. A little bit of this. Ah, treasure. Nice. Why are you floating, Pamela? I appreciate that Pamela
has just risen up. Oh, what is this? We have some survivors. Well, we had some survivors. Yes. Good. Now obviously they need to eat
a lot more to get to their next level. Okay, some of this. All right, ready to go down. Oh hold on, we may be able
to get them one more level. Slay the pigs. Eat the pigs. Yes. Oh ho ho ho. There we go. Whoo, see they've been eating
lots of protein so they're starting to get pretty
buffed. Oh my God. Ah, thank you children. Actually, hold on, I need a little bit
of iron before I can start doing this. Oh and by the way they throw
anvils now. Don't ask why, no one really knows. Definitely gonna need a furnace. Ah, this is what I was looking for. Yeah, whatever,
just feel free to kill anything. Having exceedingly violent murderous
children was the best thing I ever did. [chuckles] Oh my God. I gotta start cooking this iron. Don't shoot me. What the hell are you kids shooting at? Oh, never mind. Good job. Yeah, kill them. No survivors. Look at the giant line of angry axolotls. Okay, perfect. I do appreciate that they're also
starting to drop protein for me to eat. Okay, now we're ready to roll. Give me the gold. Oh, so sweet. Give me the diamonds. Hell yes. Oh, the hell? My God. All of my children just grew up
to the next level, but they turned into Reginalds. Hold on, hold on. Okay, there you go. I love that at this point, they just go off and they kill
everything on their own. I don't even need to help them. Oh, yeah, one of these. Might as well make everything I can. Look at all the buffs at this point. I honestly don't think that
I'll need to upgrade them until we get into the Nether cause they're
gonna have plenty to eat down there. Oh my God. Oh, oh, oh sweet Jesus. Oh, I've got too far. That is too many zeros. What have you found? Ah, oh my God. You bunch of psychopaths. Oh, hey, you guys found
super ore, good job. Oh, you found lava too. Okay, okay. Okay. All right. Okay, good. Yep, yep, you did well. Kids, you did well. You did well. Jesus. Okay. While they're going absolutely insane. Hold on. I need to-- Give me the water. No. Got it. Yeah, you know what, whatever. Just-just go ahead. Have a--
have all the fun you guys want. What'd you miss, a spider? Oh, yeah. There we go. Are we done? We're done? We're done. Okay. Wow. Oh man. Okay. Jesus. There. There we go. Just let me get the Obsidian
please. I love how they're all just
standing behind me. Oh, God. Oh, God. I think I'm mostly resistant. I'm c- I'm c-- I'm like completely
resistant to fire though because of them, so that's good. Oh, yeah, there you go. Okay. I think everything's-- Uh, I was
gonna say I think everything's dead so I can make the portal [?]. Chill out. Okay. Okay. Okay, everything's fine. Ah, everything's not fine. Oh my God, everything is
so not fine. Must work quickly. Must work quickly. Yeah, great, flint, iron, got it. Okay, let's. Okay, okay, okay. Okay. Okay, two more super ore. It is just bedlam. Look at what they've done
to this place. [laughs] Okay, let's go. Well, well, well. Hi piglins. Grab a snack here before the
the genocide of piglins begins. And it has begun. Go ahead. You guys might as well get
upgraded to the next level. Start slaying. Oh here, I guess we could
just swim across. Not like fire hurts us right now. Oh, they live in harmony with piglins or
they just don't like to eat rotting flesh. Oh, it's an enderman. Do you guys like eating? The answer is yes. Yeah. You know what, get them, go. I don't even know
why I made armor, it's not gonna last because
they keep pulling it off. Okay, sweet. So-- [yeet] someone just yeeted
a frickin' anvil in the middle of nowhere. So it looks like they leave
piglins alone. That's good. I don't have any gold that
I'm wearing right now. Oh, but, hold on, you know, as long as they don't immediately
blow this up, I should be fine. There might as well get a little
bit more gold just to make sure we get the appropriate amount
of pearls. Nice. Hi, piglin. Oh, bye piglins. Okay. Oh, God. Oh, God. Stop killing the piglins. God, they've lived with murder for
so long that they know nothing else. Okay, we have- we have reached
harmony, thank God. No. No. You're freaking gassed. Okay, here we go- here we go. there's one single piglin. All right, you're perfect,
just-just-just do what you do. Do not look directly at
the axolotls, for gods sakes. I have an axolotl named
Karen. I have determined now that kids just exist
to make my life very, very difficult. Halfway there. Can you all not go insane
for 10 minutes? Okay. Is-is-is this a single piglin left
alive anywhere? One sad piglin? I guess I can get more gold
while I'm not doing anything but looking at the bodies of
the dead for God's sakes. I love how Evelyn is just sitting
behind this piglin waiting for her chance to kill him. Ow. Well, he shot me but
we've got two more. I have to keep making boots. They keep blowing them up. All right, piglin, you and I have
the same fashion sense. Don't be an idiot. Thank you. Okay, now you may kill him. Okay, so listen, the blazes-- You know what? Go apeshit. Kill all of them. Uh, yeet. Oh blazes. I've got a mountain of children
and they're all very pissed off. Okay, y'all know what to do. If it looks like it could-- I was gonna say if it looks like it
could cook a ham sandwich kill it. Oh-oh, god. Well done, you pack of maniacs. Did you leave me a blare. [laughs] Oh. Huh, a blaze. Kill. Kill it. Well done. I'm sure this is gonna work. I'm gonna hide over here. When the blazes spawn, my children
will massacre them instantaneously. And then I'll go over
and pick up the rods. Okay, Brandon,
you're leading the charge. There you go. Get up. And there you have it. Yoink, nice. Need a few more, kids. Keep going. Right, I hide over here. They stand over there. If I sit in this little pocket
of golden diamond, I don't think I can get blown out of it. They're probably going to level up soon. I don't even know if they can eat fire. I'm-- actually, if it's possible,
they're probably going to try. Let's see if I can eat this bread
for 10 seconds without my entire world folding
in on itself with death. Oh, I got too close. All right, that's still
worked out really good. And after the death of an entire mountain
of blazes, we're ready to roll. And one more for good measure. The Ender Dragon is
so monumentally screwed. Uh, huh. Kids, hungry? Apparently, the answer is yes. Oh. Ah, the pork chops helped
everyone level up, my axolotl children are
now fully grown. Now in order for everyone to truly
understand how stupidly powerful they get when they're full grown. Oh, hold on. I think you know what time it is. Oh, and they can fly now by the way,
like legitimately they can fly. All right, put down one of these. Of course, we'll do some of this. Right. Go 'head, boys. They can actually reverse gravity on
things too as you can probably tell. [laughs] Look at them just eating
everything to the [?] Whoo. Oh, also, they throw fish
at lightning speed to kill stuff. [laughs] Hold on. Hold on. [?] I want you to see it again. Okay, you know what? When we get to the Ender Dragon
I may even make more children. What the hell direction was I going? Okay. Oh no. Oh, you poor chickens. I mean, I know Reginald is happy about
this, this is death, horses, chickens. I can't stop them now. They have a taste for
everything's blood. All right, guys don't piss off
Smokey the Bear. How about we don't destroy
the entire forest. Oh, we made it. I can only imagine what sort of
horrible explosive terror awaits me when I finally dropped down
into the stronghold. Hi. Bye. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Oh, they found the stronghold
for me. I was kind of off. Hey, a chest. [laughs] Okay, no. Just leave the portal alone. I-I've gotta go, I've gotta go,
I've gotta go. [laughs] Fran, oh, the portal,
they've literally blown a hole out of it. Everything around it I'm just
resting in freaking lava. Okay, uh, okay, here, here,
I need to climb up and get to the portal. I love that I'm climbing up effectively
using the souls of the damned that seems really appropriate. I'm swimming up the lava
to the portal. This is where we are now
in this game, whatever. You all done, are you done? Looks like everyone's done. There they are not done. All right, a little Gray still parkours,
there we go out, rise-rise through the lava like
the mighty phoenix. You might ask yourself,
Gray, why are you swimming upward
through the lava? Listen, I have a plan. Okay ready, ready. There, that was my plan. I end up right next to the portal. Okay, well, that was awful and
here we-- ow, ow, out stop, go. Okay, so-- oh, Jesus. Okay, okay, okay. You know what, hold on. Fine, fine here. We're doing this and I have
one more idea. Here we go. 100 axolotl children. Go, look at all the fish
they're throwing. Ender Dragon, I hope you like seafood
[Laughs] Oh it's glorious. So many cod and finally,
we have a winner. Remember, kids, always you
should take plenty of fish oil. Well, I really don't know
what to say. Anyway, folks, hope you enjoyed
this episode of Minecraft deluxe stuff. Stay foxy, much love.
