Joe Dangerfield

<em>>>WELCOME BACK TO THE WORLD'S GREATEST ANIMAL KID SHOW WITH JOE</em> <em>DANGERFIELD!</em> >>HEY KIDS! IT'S ME, JOE DANGERFIELD. AND WELCOME BACK TO MY SHOW WHERE I CONFRONT THE MOST DANGEROUS ANIMALS ON EARTH. TODAY'S FIRST GUEST IS MIKE, WHO WORKS AT THE NEW YORK ZOO. >>IT'S A PLEASURE TO BE HERE JOE. [APPLAUSE] >>SO MIKE, AS A ZOOKEEPER, WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE INSECT? >>WELL, PROBABLY THE BLACK ANT. IT'S VERY ANNOYING AND IT INFESTS THE OTHER ANIMAL'S FOOD. >>REMEMBER KIDS, BLACK ANTS ARE THE NUMBER ONE CAUSE OF DEATH IN THE UNITED STATES. >>UH, THAT IS NOT TRUE. >>IF YOU SEE A BLACK ANT, THE BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS PLAY DEAD. MOST ANTS JUST KILL FOR THE THRILL. >>I THINK YOU'RE THINKING OF BEARS. >>HA HA! ACTUALLY BEARS ARE PERFECTLY HARMLESS AS LONG AS YOU HAND FEED THEM SO THAT THEY DON'T GET HUNGRY. >>UH, JOE KIDS ARE PRETTY IMPRESSIONABLE. MAYBE YOU SHOULD BE CAREFUL. >>TIP OF THE DAY. ALWAYS CAMP ALONE! A BEAR IS MUCH MORE LIKELY TO ATTACK A LARGE GROUP THAN AN INDIVIDUAL. >>OKAY, KIDS, YOU SHOULD PROBABLY CHANGE THE CHANNEL, COVER YOUR EARS. >>AND IF YOU SEE A MOTHER GRIZZLY BEAR, GRAB HER CUBS AND RUN! SHE WILL APPRECIATE THE EXTRA TIME RELAX AND EAT HONEY BY HERSELF. >>WHO ARE YOU? >>NEXT ON THE SHOW, MIKE'S GOING TO TEACH US HOW TO GROOM OUR DOG. >>OH, THANK HEAVENS. OKAY KIDS, IT'S IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER-- >>THAT ALL PUPPIES ARE BLOODTHIRSTY KILLING MACHINES! >>WHAT? THAT'S NOT TRUE AT ALL! >>THIS PUPPY IS AN ANGEL. HER NAME IS DAISY. >>DAISY? THAT'S LIKE CALLING JACK THE RIPPER MISTER SNOWFLAKE. >>NOW WHEN GROOMING, THE FIRST THING YOU WANT TO DO IS- >>RAISE YOUR BRUSH HIGH ABOVE YOUR HEAD, CIRCLE THE BEAST WITH CAUTION. IF YOU ARE STILL ALIVE THAT MEANS HE IS ACCEPTED YOU. NEXT MAKE FOREHEAD-TO-FOREHEAD CONTACT, BUT REMEMBER DOG'S SALIVA IS THE MOST LETHAL VENOM ON EARTH, SO DO NOT LET HIM LICK YOU. >>AH! OH! OH! IF I HAD NOT RECEIVED THE PROPER MEDICAL TREATMENT, I WOULD HAVE DIED WITHIN ONE MINUTE OF INFECTION. >>I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU. >>FINALLY ON THE SHOW WE'RE GOING TO BRING OUT A CREATURE SO DANGEROUS, IT KILLED FIVE OF OUR TRAINERS WHO ATTEMPTED TO CAPTURE IT. WE LIKE TO CALL IT THE WINGED DEATH, BUT IT'S MORE COMMONLY KNOWN AS THE MONARCH BUTTERFLY. >>THE MONARCH IS THE GENTLEST CREATURE ON EARTH. WATCH KIDS AS I HARMLESSLY PUT MY HAND INTO ITS CAGE. [ANIMAL SCREECHING] >>OH! OH! >>SHOOT HER! >>HELP ME! HELP ME! >>JOIN US NEXT WEEK-- SHOOT HER!

Channel: Studio C

Views: 1,754,593

Rating: 4.9476528 out of 5

Keywords: Studio C, BYUtv, BYU Television (TV Network), animal, animal show, Jack Hanna's Animal Adventures (TV Program), puppy, dog, puppy dog, cute, cute puppy, funny, spoof, parody, Dogs, Comedy, Animal (Fictional Character), Cuteness (Website Category), Sketch Comedy (TV Genre), key and peele, SNL, Saturday Night Live (TV Program), college humor, humor

Id: YfWWQdEJwqo

Length: 3min 31sec (211 seconds)

Published: Mon Nov 11 2013

Reddit Comments

[u/pendia]

Dog's aren't as harmless as they may seem.

But he knows that if there is one thing you should fear - it's butterflies.