IELTS Live - Task 1 Writing - Band 9 Process Diagram

hi students and welcome to today's live ielts class my name is adrian and i'm streaming to you from beautiful victoria here on the west coast of canada i hope everybody has had a lovely week and is looking forward to a great weekend in this class everyone we are looking at isles task one writing and we're looking specifically at the academic task one uh we're focusing on a band nine process uh diagram today there are lots of different kinds of academic tasks 1 topics there are bar charts line graphs and pie charts and one of the kinds that you will see at times is called a process diagram we'll get into that in a bit this lesson everyone is brought to you by aehelp.com for academic ielts success visit us there for the general ielts check us out at g i e l t s help dot com that's general ieltshelp.com on both of those websites we have lots and lots of resources for you i'll quickly show you these while we wait for some more students this is our academic ielts website here with the blue background you can click this big red button there to join the premium package it's a one-time payment for lifetime access so it's well worth it after you join you have a my student account in your my student account you will have access to computer-based ielts practice exams a full interactive course workbooks that you can print study plans over a hundred hours of hd lesson videos and for the general ielts it's the green background you can click that big red button to join us there uh and there you will find general isles uh welcome ahmed hi rumi hi md munir from bangladesh hi riyad welcome our members hassan uh bijin harsh good to see many students in this class all right everyone uh to get our apps go to um your play store get academic ielts help link it to a help dot com or if you're studying for general outs general islets help link it to gileshelp.com welcome carolina our moderator as well bihungi welcome from sri lanka all right um so uh if you have questions just send me an email adrian ae help dot com you can get our exam books from amazon and we have lots of lessons tomorrow we'll have speaking let's get into today's uh ielts task one writing here is the question for the day so let's take a look at this the following diagram shows the process of making instant noodles describe the main features and steps in this production so i know it's a fan favorite most of us are familiar with instant noodles i'm myself have had a fair share of instant noodles in my life so let's learn about this manufacturing process while writing this essay okay um so uh you get to your writing section you get to task one always start with task one task one for the academic is an expository essay which means you have to explain expose the information to your reader carolina says me you've had your fair share of instant noodles as well um vg says wow maggie two minute noodles yes indeed so let's learn about how these noodles are made okay so basically the task 1 of academic ielts will have four paragraphs usually it will have an introduction uh then it will have an overview then it will have a body paragraph and then um maybe a summary okay so uh the body paragraph is the analysis that's your main part of the essay okay and there's really kind of a recipe to this just like instant noodles so instant noodles boil some water open the lid halfway pour in the boiling water close the lid wait for three minutes take the lid off wait a minute or two to let it cool don't burn your mouth and then you're ready to eat um just like instant noodles uh task one is um structured there's kind of a step one step two step three in this way okay uh space odd jobs yeah um so space oddjobs is asking do we always need to paraphrase the question in the intro yeah for ielts that's kind of the standard and i mean that does make sense for expository essays space odd jobs because that's your first step to explaining what you're looking at is paraphrasing the question itself so okay um and let's do that so it's not just a paraphrase though that's the important point here so the first step the introduction is a paraphrase of the question with added details okay so that's what makes it unique it's a little bit more uh than just a simple paraphrase of the question in this case uh up here okay so what you do uh for the added details is you want to take a look at the actual diagram okay so look at the diagram for the details okay let's do that um so let's look at today's diagram for manufacturing noodles all right making the screen a little bit smaller so we can see more of this uh process it's a big diagram okay um so manufacturing instant noodles you got your instant noodles right there and then you have the first kind of phase in this process uh where you have these storage silos and you have a truck filled with flour and then you have uh it's very clearly labeled the second third fourth fifth sixth seventh and eighth uh step in the process uh which involves a lot of machinery uh you can see that there's water and oil that's being added here uh you see that there are cups that are being used labels that are being used so we've got some other materials coming into the process and now that we have a look at this we have enough information to put together that introduction so paraphrasing the question and then adding uh some details okay all right let's do that let's do it together yes eric's soul we have eight steps from start to finish okay so let's put together this introduction all right and we want to go back to our original question so here we have the following diagram shows okay well we know that this is a process diagram so we can say the given process instead of diagrams i can say process diagram but i can also say blueprint in this case because it is kind of uh it's a blueprint for diagram is a fairly accurate synonym and it's a process blueprint okay it's a blueprint of the process of manufacturing right uh nishant you can write in passive voice depending on the information absolutely we might do some of that today so the given process uh blueprint illustrates okay illustrates is a good word because an illustration is a drawing and in this case the blueprint is a drawing and you can use the word illustration in a verb form illustrates so the given blueprint or process blueprint instead of process i'm going to go stepwise okay teach you another word there so stepwise means step by step step one step two step three okay so the given stepwise blueprint illustrates the following diagram shows wow it's almost like this is way better way more academic than this okay so learn these synonyms there are lots of synonyms for words for task one questions okay so the given stepwise blueprints illustrates the process we can say method okay there's always another word so instead of the process the method of manufacturing it is a manufacturing process so instead of making manufacturing instant noodles now you shouldn't paraphrase that keep the subject the same so don't say instant pasta or something like that it's it's okay paraphrase but instant pasta is a little bit different than instant noodles so um for the subject just keep that the same okay in eight stages and it also reveals the uh necessary materials and machinery okay so that's my added information okay so there's eight clear stages that are marked and indicated as one two three four five so we don't have to guess here how many stages it also shows me that there are some other components or materials like water and oil and labels and cups so i'm not going to detail those right now and the machinery right it shows all the different machines so that's kind of what i want to include there all right and don't be shy students write with me okay right with me um rashika no prompt is not a good synonym for instant in this case okay um instant noodles it really is just that okay you can't write prompt noodles it's very strange so prompt means to be on time or to be quick it doesn't make sense in this context so good question okay um yeah uh mal you can say components instead of materials so necessary components um is okay the reason i didn't use components mall is because when we have machinery uh components are more accurate for parts of machinery so like the components of a car or the components of a phone so that's why i chose the word materials here instead of components components is very accurate for electronic devices and machinery okay all right uh bakarat writes the given blueprint describes the process of manufacturing instant noodles in a large meal factory following several number of methods from the storing silo to sealing and packing okay bakra don't use huge okay students uh please take this advice from me this is just uh kind of general advice and i'm going to put it up here for you and i'll even use the bigger font here so do not use the word huge in your writing it is colloquial and awkward okay i see so many students using the word huge and i almost feel like whenever ielts examiners see the word huge in your writing you lose a band score right away um it's like programmed into them it's just because so many people use the word huge and huge is yes it's an english word but it's being used too often in kind of a slangish type of way um so it's awkward and i recommend avoiding it in your speaking and in your writing essays okay there are lots of other words like great large many a lot okay that are just they read better it's overused i see way too many huge huge in people's writing marasa a long time no see and i like marasa's comment marasa says huge things and stuff yeah don't use those words huge thing and stuff just use better words there are better words okay and yuen says massive yeah massive is a much nicer word than huge and very good okay all right so let's not use those words huge thing and stuff okay all right um so introduction the given stepwise blueprint illustrates the method of manufacturing instant noodles in eight stages and it also reveals the necessary materials and machinery all right let's do an overview okay don't write overview when you're doing your essay this is just so you know what's going on okay what part of the essay is what part so here we have our introduction all right and now we're going into our overview the overview simply is kind of like the main features so um it's it's what we actually see here okay um so what are the main features what is really needed in this process okay um so here we have storage silos we have flour then we have water and oil here we have some machines that mix that create the dough then you have some noodle disks then you have some cooking oil and drying happening here we have some uh vegetable spices uh being added to the cups and then we have labeling and sealing and then the labels and we finally have our wonderful instant noodles coming out on the conveyor belt here okay learn that word conveyor belt i'll repeat that i'm sure a couple of times later on um so what's the main uh feature so what do we notice about this process of creating instant noodles what is required before we get into the details and describe each step one after the next so first second third fourth um what do we what do we realize so mal says there are materials yeah raw materials or we can call them ingredients right there's the actual making and there's the packaging um eric's soul says uh the assembly line yeah absolutely okay uh so write your overview i'm going to do the same let's see if we end up with something similar okay all right so here we go i'm going to say at first glance because it's a drawing right so we kind of glance at a drawing or a blueprint so i'm going to start off by saying at first glance right so at first glance all right um so that's what i noticed looking at this diagram initially at my first glance so first glance it becomes apparent and here's that passive voice right it becomes apparent to me um somebody was asking about the passive voice so at first glance it becomes apparent that instant noodles require several ingredients namely flour water oil vegetable and spices the production line involves several mechanical steps as well as cooking and finally packaging so that's kind of how um it all seems to come together okay uh nissan thank you for sharing the word conveyor belt in the chat okay uh conveyor belt is the belt that moves the products okay um so miles says this factory makes its noodles in several steps before it's uh ready for uh consumption says it makes me feel hungry um don't repeat yourself so we already said um that uh it takes uh eight steps or eight stages to create it so i wouldn't say several steps again be really careful with repetition okay so for high band score students it's very very important that you have clear concise writing without repetition so do not repeat your uh ideas in your essay okay work hard to give uh uh new information because for wordiness it's called wordiness this mistake wordiness does cost band scores at the higher bands okay so if you're going for that 789 you have to avoid uh that wordiness okay yeah space odd jobs sure you can use synonyms like overall um absolutely okay uh june writes immediately it is clear that the manufacturing of instant noodles is mainly finished in a line production including mixing rolling cutting cooking and packaging furthermore the raw materials include water oil vegetables and spices okay yeah maul i saw that you wrote that you forgot about the intro yeah it's very easy to do that mullen many people do that so it's too bad you pulled that message because that was a good point don't forget your introduction when you write the overview many people do that okay uh bakarat writes immediately it can be seen that making instant noodle is a process that has continued from one shift to another it requires a number of ingredients including water flour oil vegetables and spices not fruits buck rot okay all right jess that's right so most of the process is done on conveyor belts but i think i might save that for my summary jess so that's a good tip all right rebel manny don't worry about your score don't get down on yourself just keep focused and you'll do better okay uh identify your mistakes and improve all right so i'm going to grab my introduction and overview and i'm going to put it below the diagram just so we can work through this a little bit more smoothly okay and now we'll get into our analyses analyses is um analysis there we go um analyses is plural for analysis okay that's why it's an e instead of an i and now we begin uh with step one okay and process diagrams are where you want to use this firstly secondly thirdly okay don't do that in your other essays use it in process diagrams only okay so this is another tip for you because oftentimes i see this kind of writing in the in task 2 as well and that's um it's not the best so it's better used for process essays so use first or firstly secondly finally in process diagrams do not use it this type of leading expression or these types of leading expressions in task two okay they're awkward when you're making an argument it's awkward to read firstly secondly uh in verbal communication we'll do that like firstly we need to do this because but in written communication there's better ways okay so uh let's save that for these process diagrams so what happens here firstly okay so this is where you want to concentrate on uh verbs okay so this flower truck uh what is it doing what's the verb that we're looking for yeah marasa initially is good too so here what becomes very important are the verbs the verbs that you're using to explain what is happening the actions that are happening in each of these eight steps and you have eight steps so don't write really long sentences maybe try to combine some of these steps we'll get into that with some connective words okay um what is uh this flower truck doing okay um ma says pumping yeah so uh we can say pumps yeah pump i think is a good word uh you can also say fill right would be another one as well okay any other words um storing uh nudge is not good because it's actually the silos that are storing the truck is not storing okay the truck is filling or pumping uh the storage silos okay uh putting in is not good carolina it's awkward it's an awkward use of that phrasal verb here because it's not actually putting it in okay so pumping or filling is much better um think about your car like pumping gas into your car or filling gas into your car this is kind of the same concept here okay and then masa is also transporting yeah so transport or deliver right so i would be using a combination of these words uh for my first sentence okay and um yeah uh let's put that together and then you'll see how it really kind of jives okay so at first trucks deliver and pump flour into storage silos okay start simple avoid mistakes start clear and clean okay that's a good way to do it so at first trucks deliver and pump flour into storage silos all right keep it simple okay all right um let's see uh naji says firstly flower is filled uh in storage silos by trucks yeah that works naji um marasa writes initially trucks transport flower and pump flower into storage silos morass you need to finish that idea yeah storage silos are missing okay also uh don't repeat yourself marasa so flour flour right and we don't count flour okay so cooking flour is a non-count noun everyone flowers like the beautiful flowers that we smell roses tulips yeah we can count them flowers a dozen flowers but flour like the cooking flower that you make your uh bread with we do not count it okay it's like sand it's very fine you can't count it okay um ichi says a glance at the process provided reveals the information about how to make instant noodles overall there are seven stages in the process beginning with storage silos and culminating in labeling it's a bit complex ichthy i would simplify that and break it up a bit uh june says to begin with the storage silos are filled with flour transported by lorries yeah really nice use of the word lori's june thank you for that vocabulary and nice use of the passive form there as well okay rashika firstly the flower lorry is delivered and pumped uh into storage silos very good okay um okay so here we go everyone uh next step okay uh the flour goes into this machine called the mixer um and then water and oil are added um to create dough okay so you're creating dough in this all right um so flour water oil what's happening here what's the verb again it's all about the verbs and your connective words for this kind of process essay so good connections good verbs will make a great essay for this type of question okay so what are we doing with the water and oil okay and don't say mixed because the machine is a mixer so we don't want to repeat words even if they're different word form okay i'll make yeah i can see a lot of mixing coming up and that's not good but me yen says let's not do that let's say combine okay so here's another big tip i'm doing a lot of do nots today uh reason why is i've seen a lot of these uh over the years so uh do not repeat uh words even in the same sentence even if they are a different uh word form okay so i'll give you the example of that so you know what i'm talking about a little bit clearer so um [Music] second secondly the flour is mixed with water and oil in the mixer okay um just like in any other language it's a bit awkward like if you think about it in your own language it's kind of awkward when you have this kind of mixed in the mixer it's like okay mixed in the mixer right mixer does the mixing um it's not wrong it's just not great okay so you want to avoid that okay so secondly the flower is combined in the mixer is combined okay and again if you're not sure what a good synonym is use the thesaurus okay all right um kushara blended yeah that works okay so you blend exactly blend combine melt kasharga is giving us lots of great words stir yeah very good so lots of words there okay secondly the flour is combined with water and oil in the mixer and don't just stop there so you have to create you know some more complex sentences to get those higher band scores um in order to make the dough uh so here i've taken my simple sentence and now i've turned it into a complex sentence of cause and effect in order to make the dough so secondly the flowers combined with water and oil in the mixer in order to make the dough much better right much much better yeah naji agrees with me because naji put up the same comment in order to create the dough all right town you in a little bit different direction but that works so secondly the dough is created by the mixer combining the flour with water and oil i like it so you've switched the order of the content but you've created a great sentence towel so that's really good all right okay good job okay so that's how we keep going all right um now here we have dough sheets and dough strips okay and you can kind of see that this and this are somewhat of a smooth process transition so i would combine steps three and four if you write a sentence for each one you're going to end up with a very very long essay most likely um so uh it might be a good idea to create some more complex compound sentences um and combine these steps okay all right and i'm gonna do the same so you do that and then we'll compare okay that will make our writing a little bit more smooth again you're interpreting the information for your readers you're not just reporting but you're interpreting especially for those high band scores all right so let's do it and keep going back to the diagram okay and use your vocabulary so here i'm combining uh these steps so steps three and four again paying attention to my use of verbs and connectives so after this right after we have this combination and we have the dough after this the dough is rolled into sheets before being cut into strips while moving along a conveyor belt okay notice all the use of verbs i have some passive voice being cut rolled so rolled cut moving along conveyor belt nice vocabulary you're picking up lexical resource marks um a moo thereby one word okay so amu writes thereby the prepared dough is made into sheets um before being cut into strips okay let me watch your language use there june in the next step the flower obtained from the silos is blended with water and oil to form the dough followed by being flattened into dough sheets in a roller and cut into strips yeah june i really like the start of it i would probably separate out the second element okay of the followed by being flattened that's a reads a little bit awkward if you read that smoothly you'll realize that it's a little bit of an awkward read so in great writing we're actually considering how the reader reads our writing and there i find it a little bit kind of like i'm getting stuck like followed by flat followed by being flattened into dough sheets in a roller and cut into dough strips it's a bit awkward okay so i would probably separate that out to make it smoother for the reader all right again for those high band scores you really have to write really well like they're looking for professional professional writing at the high university level and it is possible it just takes practice and know-how all right okay um so we have the dough strips now those dough strips are made into disks all right um so they're made into disks made is an okay word it's kind of general um what would be another verb for what's happening here so this machine is doing something funky it's taking these noodles and it's basically spinning them into these discs and you've probably seen that when you buy instant noodles that they have these shapes sometimes they're disc shaped sometimes they're shaped in kind of waves and bricks okay in this case we have these discs okay what do you think would be a good verb for what's happening here instead of just simply using made shaped fisa is not a bad word converting is okay as well amu okay um there's another word starts with a c molded is okay shape and mold are okay they're better than made so shape mold okay it's fine um there's another word that starts with a c that will work better okay prepared is fine um when you have so what is this shape actually called there's a word for this shape it starts with a c uh curl is okay so curled is a good word that's not what i was thinking about but curled is okay like the curling iron for hair okay so curl is good there's another one that starts with a c that works as well okay if you uh think about electrical components uh coil everybody familiar with the word coil so coiled into uh disks okay so curled or coiled they're basically synonyms uh these two words okay so there's a couple of new words for some of you rashika there we go rashika says coil spin is okay pius so um spin is another one that would work and uh remember this is an irregular so if you're using uh the passive voice they're spun into disks uh that would be a really good verb to use as well remember your mark also comes from your lexical resource and of course the better the vocabulary the better you're writing so it does matter okay all right so all of those words are fantastic uh so let's uh write this sentence now so spun curled coiled those all work well okay and when you kind of get lost you can refer back to the stage right so here we go check it out in stage five another machine um coils the strips of dough into circular disks okay good now um again uh here my sentence is fairly simple even though it's using some nice vocabulary so before i put a period to the end of this sentence i want to keep looking at my diagram and seeing if i can maybe include some more information and to make it a little bit more complex to create that complex sentence okay um and i can probably uh combine this with uh number six okay so cooking um we have in brackets oil don't miss information if you don't have to so it's cooked in oil and then dried okay and let me see if i can maybe combine the sixth stage with the fifth stage to make a more complex sentence so in stage five another machine coils the strips of dough into circular disks um and now i've already used before so prior uh to the sixth stage which involves cooking the discs in oil and drying all right now i'm much more satisfied with the complexity of this sentence okay so that's another of course uh criteria that your ielts essay is being marked on is how well you can use grammar to create cohesion and complexity in your sentences so in stage five another let's try to get the right spelling here another machine coils the strips of dough into circular disks prior to the sixth stage now prior to the six stages additive so i'm going to have to insert some commas here prior to the sixth stage which involves cooking the discs in oil and then drying all right so let me keep rolling with the punches here and keep moving forward so you can see a little bit of fluency in the writing here uh the discs are placed in cups um and uh they also uh get some vegetables and spices now i'm not gonna say get because it's not the best verb here so while i'm thinking i'll uh come up with the better verb for that okay so vegetables and spices are added usually in packets but we don't have that information like i'm sure all of you know that when you get your instant noodles you have the spices and vegetables separately in little packs and then you rip them open it's a lot of fun and then you put them in there and you're like ooh and if you don't like a lot of spices you could just put half the bag in there and then the other half somehow always magically disappears and we never find it again but um anyway never include information that you don't see so if you don't see vegetable and spice packages don't say vegetable and spice packages okay just use the information all right that's another big do not so do not include information that you do not see in the diagram okay so finally the noodles are ready to be packed into cups along with vegetables and spices okay um so and then i can say here in the next phase or in the next step so that it's clear for the reader that this is a unique step okay uh naji writes once the disks are dry they are placed into cups and vegetable and spices are added naji good one important tip naji do not use will okay another word so remember that list of words don't use huge don't use stuff don't use things don't use will as well in your essays okay so avoid jumping to the future i'm gonna write that in here for you okay so um do not use huge in your writing okay uh do not use things even worse do not use stuff and don't use will okay essays read much better when they stay in the present general tenth tense they hold a lot more truth that way i could talk to you about that for a while but we want to finish this essay okay so uh before ready for the store shelf uh we have one more step here step eight uh we have labeling and sealing um so uh before the instant noodles are ready to be delivered to stores we need to label and seal them so we know whether we're eating instant ramen or whether we're eating hot chicken noodle soup right okay lastly labels are added to the cups as they are sealed and made ready for market delivery all right so there we go lastly labor's labels are added to the cups as they are sealed and made ready for market delivery okay now i've done a good job i think i'm good to go but before i move on to task two if i've got another minute it's worth my time to include a summary expository essays will include a summary usually that gives the reader an idea uh that they can take with them about this a process that you have just described okay so thou writes in the last step the cooked and dried noodle discs are put into cups with the addition of vegetables and spices before the cups are labeled and sealed okay good all right so let's write a summary in summary well let's not capitalize that in summary uh it becomes clear uh from this diagram that the production of instant noodles is mostly automated and um manufactured in large quantities all right um so there's my summary how did i come up with that well we don't really see a lot of human effort here other than uh somebody probably driving this truck but maybe in the near future that won't even be a human job um so boom it goes in there and no people nothing nobody's kneading the dough by hand nobody's chopping up those noodles nobody's putting them into cups it's all machines running along one giant conveyor belt and we can see that you know it's not just one disc but it's a lot of discs moving through to a lot of cups no surprise there so it's made in large quantities quickly we don't know about the quickly part so i'm careful not to include that but i can certainly say that we've got large quantities of instant noodles coming out onto the shelf i bet you millions and millions of instant noodles are made this way each day uh let me read the essay make sure that it makes sense so the given stepwise blueprint illustrates the method of manufacturing instant noodles in eight stages and it also reveals the necessary materials and machinery at first glance it becomes apparent that instant noodles require several ingredients namely flour water oil vegetable and spices the production line involves several mechanical steps as well as cooking and finally packaging at first let's put a comma after that leading expression always follow your leading expressions with commas so at first trucks deliver and pump flour into storage silos secondly the flowers combine with water and oil in the mixer in order to make the dough after this the dough is rolled into sheets before being cut into strips while moving along a conveyor belt in stage five another machine coils the strips of dough into circular disks prior to the sixth stage which involves cooking the discs in oil and then drying finally in the next step the noodles are ready to be packed into cups along with vegetables and spices lastly labels are added to the cups as they are sealed and made ready for market delivery in summary it becomes clear from this diagram that the production of instant noodles is mostly automated and manufactured in large quantities that's your band 9 essay guarantee you that if you write that with that spelling with that writing that task 1 is going to be considered a band 9. okay students so that's what you want to do that's what you want to replicate emphasizing again some points from this class don't repeat words okay so think of good synonyms think of good verbs right for your process diagram think of good connections focus on creating complex and compound sentences don't just have 10 simple sentences each one followed by the next it will read poorly okay andre i'm glad you enjoyed this lesson i hope everybody else did too carolina thank you so much for moderating this lesson again this lesson will be up on our channel and you will be able to review it make sure to subscribe to our channel and set your notifications so that you know when these live classes are on aurora arun uh thank you for joining us over in general english help you're fun very good eugene those happy emojis will start the weekend well for many i'm sure um again tomorrow i'm back with some more lessons so tomorrow we still have speaking part two speaking part three where i will describe the steps for high band scores for those parts of your interview have a great rest of your day everyone remember to check out glshelp.com click that big red button to join our premium package as well check out aehelp.com to get all of these goodies that are listed here again it's a one-time payment for lifetime access see you all tomorrow have a lovely rest of your day much love to all of you wherever you are i'm adrian signing out from victoria bye for now you

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Keywords: IELTS writing task 1, diagram, pie chart, line graph, bar chart, flow-chart, IELTS descriptions, International English Language Testing System, English examination, writing for graphs, writing for charts, writing for tables, IELTS task 1, Lesson, Teacher, Learn, Student, Lessons, Learning, Free, Intro, Tutorial, IELTS task 1 explain, IELTS task 1 learning, IELTS task 1 descriptions

Id: LMyzYyxNtzU

Length: 53min 38sec (3218 seconds)

Published: Fri Oct 15 2021