How is Twitter free? #89

oh you're with that dude now all right check this out when a guy only has one instagram post it's always a pic of himself that looks like one of these no but can we just take a second to appreciate adam sandler's drip he really didn't have to flex on us like that but oh proud that swag hey what's up cuties my name is fainted and welcome back to howard's twitter free in the last episode i kind of jokingly asked you guys to record yourself saying subscribe to fainted and i'd pick one of them and use it as the intro for the next video and i couldn't believe how many of you guys actually did it which is awesome to see i probably watched like 100 different videos at least but one dude actually wrote a song saying subscribe to fainted and i think you need to see this [Music] and like his to videos to fainted right now it's not every day your ears get blessed with such a musical masterpiece thank you king subscribe to fainted right now after watching that you know you have to subscribe anyways hope you guys enjoyed the video and let's get straight into it if i bring you breakfast in bed just say thank you i don't want to hear all that other freak you get in my house i think about this almost every day okay so this girl posts onto her instagram story a little poll saying should we date yes or no at niall horan and it got 84 yes and 16 no but let's just take a look at who voted no shall we rip niall horan himself voted no don't think he wants to be your boyfriend sorry one time i was on a date in high school and i got pulled over and a police officer let me off of a warning but fined my date 100 because she was only four for eight and by law was supposed to be in a booster seat and honestly i think about this a lot she eventually fought it in court and won because she wasn't driving but apparently it is a in the fine print law if you're under four foot ten you have to be in a booster seat imagine that high school girl turns up to her first date with this dude and she's like um yeah i hope you don't mind but i had to bring along my booster seat that'd be so awkward man um who is this sign for no geese yep sorry not a loud past here geese i hope you can read this by the way as far as i'm aware i don't think geese can understand the premise of a no entry side like they're not going to be waddling along and be like oh man it says no geese beyond this point ah that sucks they're just gonna walk straight past it you don't hate cats you just can't handle rejection twitter group chats really be 38 people from cali five from texas two from new york and some random dude from london got a lass on my snapchat who puts all the letters her boyfriend censor from jail on her story and i can't just delete her because i'm so invested in this delinquent he got hash browns for dinner yesterday john david washington says he would hide his father's identity to get acting jobs on his own i used to lie saying he was a construction worker or in jail he better than me because i would have wrote my father is denzel on my forehead someone has been using my netflix for months they always hog it i thought it was just my man till i got this random email what the frick okay so this random email says thanks for netflix hey it's been several months since i'm using your netflix so thank you so much it's been a pleasure all thanks to you but now it's showing that you have to update your billing details so please if you can resolve that thank you tamara this guy really has the audacity to be like oh yes could you please resolve that yeah we got a bit of a problem here it's not letting me sign into the netflix dude just buy your own account america you drive for four hours you are still in the same part of the country uk you drive for two hours the local accent has changed twice bread rolls have a new name i cannot imagine being young and hot and giving a single heck about this college is a privilege it shouldn't be free absolutely refusing to listen to or rely on anyone who thinks scrunchies are wall decor wow i got a feeling this person may have some kind of degree or qualification in interior design that is wild dressed up for hashtag national girlfriend day he's one of our kind we have a man of culture here i know now why you don't have a girlfriend it's all because of the toilet paper and also he does have a girlfriend look look at this queen not all of us can get 3d girlfriends okay don't judge he said i'm not like other girls how does he know other girls i can't freaking breathe damn that's so deep she's not a bad texter she's just been making fun of you in the group chat move on bro i've had a screenshot of our text conversation sent to me by accident with the caption he's so emotional i was hurting dog oh man next up we have a video captioned the secret meaning behind the ea logo [Music] stay where you are wow dude ea is literally sweating right now we're cracking a conspiracy i fainted please put this in the next house twitter free okay my mom you don't pay any bills in this house me xbox live 12 month gold membership you don't even understand how classic this is like some of my younger viewers may genuinely not recognize this like i'm pretty sure xbox live is still a thing but that old design was so clean and it really just hits me with the nostalgic feels i remember they used to have the little microsoft point cards as well what a time what a time don't pass me the orcs because we are finna be missing her just turns on some like i don't know drake marvin's room ah i'ma play these two and we all gonna be sobbing money machine by 100 gecks ah yes this song so dark and melancholic honestly if this doesn't make you cry i don't know what will sad how i think about her but she doesn't do the same to me she my whole book and i ain't even a chapter in hers rip this is why uh we have anime girls guys here's a quote for you anime girls won't break your heart real girls will wow that's actually kind of deep i quite like that i might just get that printed on a t-shirt sell it as much and then take the hundreds of thousands of dollars of profit and spend it all on dates of my anime ego that doesn't actually exist but i pretend she does crazy to see some people coming as streamers like ludwig and pokey when what they don't realize is streamers get all the hottest babes talk to all the coolest dudes have the sickest hair and have the dopest lives okay suspicious says i hate this freaking website and it's because of a response she got to a tweet where she said men spend at least 40 of their life farting and this dude says you're hanging around to the wrong men all it takes to cut down the amount of gas you produce is an elimination diet and careful study of what triggers it you avoid those foods and take medication if needed boys spend 40 of their life farting men take control of their bowels that's right gentlemen if you are farting in 2020 just know that you're a little boy if you want to become a man you have to start taking meds and withholding yourself from a natural bodily process makes sense i used to post on a forum where some guy ridiculed people who wiped their ass because it meant they're unhealthy he claimed his diet was so clean i never had to wipe yummy when the class was wild in and the teacher started crying in the eighth grade my teacher was hurt for months so we had a few permanent substitute teachers come to fill in her spot for the entire year but we kept getting them replaced because our class kept making them cry and quit one kid even threw a tennis ball at this one lady's head and she cried and quit so quick i really shouldn't laugh at that like how do you not get expelled for doing that though if i was to throw a tennis ball at a teacher's head back in school i'd have been kicked out so quick like we got in trouble for way smaller things than that shakira and j lo at the super bowl was the closing ceremony of the planet and we really had no idea i remember when i worked in levi's at selfridges noel gallagher came in and asked why i looked sad i told him i hadn't hit target and he bought 10 pairs of black 501s i'll never forget that next up we have this video which went like super viral this week you can see it's got 10.8 million views and the caption is just question mark question mark question mark oh what could it be let's find out okay so it's a tick tock that's a great start wait on a second grabbing onto stranger's thighs right well i'm not sure it's a grab but like placing your hand on it bit awkward really but you gotta do it for the tick-tock seriously i'm gonna start doing this with random girls on a train to see how fast i can get locked up it's kind of crazy that if this tick tock was like the rose reverse and it was a a dude going up to random girls on the tube or the train or whatever and like trying to touch up their legs or maybe catching a case real quick and it wouldn't be like oh that's cute for a tick tuck you know what i mean now i'm begging you to subscribe to fainted right now anyways guys that's it for this video i really hope you did enjoy and of course if you want to check more from this series just click on the screen right now to jump into another episode and yeah i'll see you on the next one have an absolutely amazing day much love peace

Channel: Fainted

Views: 422,664

Keywords: how is twitter free, funny tweets, funny, tweets, how is twitter free? #89, fainted

Id: ibtm58Bg8QM

Length: 12min 0sec (720 seconds)

Published: Sun Aug 09 2020