How 2 Be Healthy

what's up Greg I hope y'all have any great day welcome back to my channel this of course is another episode of staying well I hope you're all staying well it's something that I've heard most youtubers say but something that I feel like not enough youtubers are actually trying to help with because you know what it's easy to get pretty caught up in the melancholy of staying home all the time and the news has been pretty drab lately I think that two things we all need right now are a good laugh and some health advice we could all stand to be a little bit more healthy and a little bit more fit in these uncertain times which is why I've taken the liberty of finding two accounts on Instagram that can help us out with this very thing the first one is called one laughter please for your daily dose of hashtag laughter every day you can have one laughter please Matt one laugh one laughter with such great memes as have you ever deleted one ha from your ha ha ha ha ha because you feel like it's too much yeah that's way too much laughter especially for this account you're only allowed one laughter you're only allowed ah ha and I found this account called Fitness corner which has some great health advice that I will be sharing with you later on and I think by the end of this video you're gonna be thanking me quite a bit for all of the valuable advice health wise and all of the laughter all right this first meme from one laughter please is a little depiction of marriage so it says wife is wife no matter who the hell you are and it's a picture of a male lion and a female lion and the female lion looks like she's about to kill the male lion and she's saying shut up and he's saying okay sorry with a sad little slanty face it really just goes to show you know no matter who you are if you're a human being like you were I or if you're a fucking lie a monogamous lion with a wife a beautiful lion wife that he loves with this little lion heart wife his wife no matter who you are and a wife tries to kill husbands wives wanna eat their spin and the quicker you understand that the quicker you can dodge their attack husband got shocked while reading his wife's report card very obedient and soft-spoken student very obedient and soft-spoken student how come my wife doesn't act like that around me swear dude every time I try to scold my wife for speaking out of turn she gets all mad and goes to stay with her friends for a couple days it doesn't say she does any of that on her report card husband his husband no matter who you are husband is a scared little cat no matter who you are if a barber makes a mistake it's a new style if a politician makes a mistake it's a new law if a scientist makes a mistake it's a new invention if a tailor makes a mistake it's a new style if a teacher makes a mistake it's a new theory but if a student makes a mistake it's a mistake I feel like none of these things are true how is any of this true if a politician makes a mistake it's a new law what does that even mean oh shit I meant to text my wife that I wanted to kiss her but I accidentally said kill now it's legally mandatory for everyone to kill their wife like imagine a rocket scientist making a small mistake that makes a rocket blow up and NASA's just like oh fuck now we gotta make them all do that when you try to understand a girl yeah honestly that's pretty funny I do not get girls like why does the one who lives with me always try to eat me does anyone know the premise of this picture seems like it's saying that boys are like normal cars you know they like work and they look normal they're nice to look at and they make sense you know you can figure them out meanwhile girls are similar to boys but they're all fucked up they're basically like boys but so horribly physically disfigured that they can't possibly function the way boys do how boys sit how girls sit quick checkpoint have you had your laughter yet if you have you have to click off the video because only one left or is allowed me to my friend please keep this secret friend banging on a big drum and is a small mouse no don't go around banging that drum now everyone's gonna know about my cool big drum that was my secret but what do people say when they find out about my secret what will they say when they know about my cool big drum when you finally understand something in maths I think this account kind of needs to work on like their demographic I don't really think they know what it is like is this account for kids or grown-ass adults cuz they've got jokes about like hating your wife but then they also have jokes about like not understanding math in school finally I've understood something in maths sure I'm 35 years old and graduated college 13 years ago but I've never understood any maths until just now I think we all know what time it is [Music] why is my wife such a bitch it actually would be pretty impressive if this polar bear understood something in maths that'd be pretty tight but sadly it seems like the only thing he knows how to do is break it down okay here's a picture of a seagull standing on a no seagull sign and then the seagulls wearing sunglasses in assess thug life cuz this seagull is a badass this seagull doesn't listen to signs he can't even read signs cuz he's a seagull why does this sign exist in the first place seagulls can't read signs can they're like what would this sign even mean if it's not for seagulls like don't bring a seagull here I don't I've never seen anyone bringing a seagull anywhere is it for people and it means like if you see a seagull you have to kill it like don't let any seagulls even be here if you see a seagull you have to get it you got to get it out of here you got to get it out fast you are responsible for any seagulls in the premises all right this next one I think is pretty true kids write what they understand men write what they remember but legends create their own answers hell yeah dude legends just make up their own answers they don't need to be told what the right answers are because they'll just make shit up I'm talking real legends okay Michael Jordan Ghandi George Washington you think they became legends because they worked hard and practiced and did what they believed in no they became legends because they made shit up sir the British militia is closing in what should I tell our troops sergeant tell them for floof in doofen but when you can see the whites in their eyes Seiden two died in a cock arena d you're truly a legend sir yes thank you and as a legend I have to say fuck their hearing other people's besties a nice-looking young girl my bestie a monkey what the fuck you got you're best friends with a monkey I want to be best friends with a sweet little monkey man like him look at him he could be one of the boys when you are singing a song and suddenly your idiot friend starts singing it to G's very hostile towards your friend just for wanting to sing along with you so let me get this straight if we're to agree with the post on one laughter please if we're to find these relatable we're meant to hate our wives their disobedient and they want to eat us our friends are idiot monkey looking asses who won't let us sing by ourselves oh and to top it all off we don't know any math we don't know how to add I don't even know how to count don't even know what a number is I couldn't even tell you if I saw one I gotta be honest gang I'm not feeling that cheered up from this I'm actually I'm actually pretty down about the whole thing if I'm being real with you at least I know my sweet little monkey man's got my bag okay I think we've got out all of our laughter we've gotten all of the one laughter out I think it's time to move on we're feeling good now let's get let's get fit let's get healthy you know staying inside we could be getting a little bit sedentary so we want to take the appropriate steps to get just that little bit healthier so someone sent me this meme from fitness corners we're gonna look at this one and then we can look at a couple others and I think you'll be pretty happy you did because this is some pretty insane advice that if true could be very big did you know dayley one Apple no doctors okay that's a pretty common phrase an apple a day keeps the doctor away I think that's a little bit of a gross oversimplification I don't think that just eating one apple a day will make you healthy forever but I'm sure that won't continue for the rest of the meme I'm sure that that that ends there and the rest of this will be you know actual practical advice five almond daily no cancer none I'm sorry no cancer none at all if you eat five almonds a day just five right that's not 500 if you eat five almonds daily no cancer why do I feel like this might not be true something about this just seems like a little bit fishy I can't put my exact finger on it but let's move on one lemon daily no fat to have you eat a lemon every day you will have no fat on your body which sounds healthy but is actually extremely unhealthy if you have 0% body fat you will die imma I'm almost certain of it one glass milk daily no bone problems daily for dates no weakness holy shit okay well I mean why did why didn't they put that one first that's really the only one they need right I mean that doesn't that kind of make all the other ones useless I feel like that takes care of everything you will have no weakness in any sense for dates and I can pretty can be gosh dang invincible there's nothing you can do to me at that point cancer I know I ate four dates yesterday so I'd try again tomorrow cancer getting hit by a car and dying uh-uh-uh-uh four dates head cut off how about four dates I got to be real with you guys this whole Kovan thing is starting to seem like it's not really a big deal why don't you just eat four dates you baby this post was created on April 12th like during the kovat epidemic so it seems to be like in some part related to it it's like trying to help people I really got to say I don't know about this advice dude last one is daily one-time prayer no tension you will not feel any tension for the rest of your day if you pray but I got to be real I feel like the dates takes care of that cuz tension is kind of a weakness I could skip the prayer I could skip the Apple the almonds the lemon the milk just eat the dates man I could be dandy all right walk 30 minutes daily get all of this improve skin texture prevents heart disease very beneficial in weight loss improves blood circulation strengthens bones and makes your mood you will not have a mood unless you walk 30 minutes a day you will be just an emotion being you will not feel any type of way about anything so it's important that you get those 30 minutes in otherwise you will you'll feel nothing so actually that probably explains why why I just don't feel anything did you know drinking raisin water daily with empty stomach for 30 to 45 days it helps to remove acne / pimples providing glowing skin it also works as a blood purifier I did not I did not know raisin water was a thing do people drink raisin water I mean if it really does clear up your skin and purify your blood it seems like a pretty good deal almost to the point where like I feel like scientists need to look into this like they should try making like raisins that have the water built into them that would be great okay here's some good advice for the fellas out there fellas if you're worried about losing your hair check this one out do opt daily empty stomach 10 to 12 times I think that's supposed to say do it or maybe this routine is called up you stand you get into a little ball you roll back you come back up do it 10 to 12 times and the benefits as per yoga say that it prevents hair fall brings glow to face gives you a curvy shaped and toned body and also relieves problems like constipation rocking back and forth 10 to 12 times a day we'll make my hair not fall out now this I got a try alright well you guys are gonna you're gonna witness it right here I hope I don't go bald from doing this ten to 12 times get in the fetal position roll back get up okay I think do is standing up part of it it looks like I just did it one time and I got a notification on my Apple watch that says move goal achieve actually it says move goal 200% so I guess this is working already I'm getting a pretty good workout in and yeah I have an Apple watch what are you going to do about it okay so that was one time let's we're gonna do 12 ready [Music] how do I look alright I kind of lost count there if I'm being honest I don't know if that was 12 but shit I think it worked pretty well one kind of weird thing I've noticed about this account is they're like really into almonds like they really really endorse almonds I mean for one we saw they prevent cancer five almonds daily no cancer but also by eating six almonds a day it helps to lose weight faster if you eat four almonds per day it helps improve concentration and makes your skin healthy and prevents heart disease if you have a headache eat 10 to 12 almonds instead of taking aspirin and eating 2 to 3 almonds a day can reverse your aging eating 2 to 3 almonds every day will turn you into Benjamin Button and just a couple years of eating almonds you will be a baby but make sure you stop then because if you keep going you'll turn back into a little egg and go back into your mom and then and then what are you gonna do you can't eat any more almonds when you're in there so be careful okay so if I total up the amount of almonds I need for each of these benefits that's twelve plus four plus three plus six plus five equals thirty almonds per day and I'll basically be a god amongst men no cancer weight loss clear skin slowly turning into a baby and no headaches ever that's the best one so that's all that means I got so I guess the only thing left to do is eat 30 almonds so while I crack open this canister of almonds why don't I tell you about today's sponsor honey who doesn't love a good deal when you're shopping I know I do these days I find myself buying a lot of stuff online because I don't want to go to the store and risk getting people sick and what I found is it's pretty hard to find coupon codes online for things like if I'm just wanting to buy a pair of pants from j.crew like were you where do you find a coupon code for that how do you get a good deal on that you just have to wait for them to be on sale I don't think so I need pants now because I ruined my other ones I don't want to talk about it but that's where honey comes in honey is a free online shopping tool that helps you find promo codes and automatically adds them to your car so you want to order a pizza well guess what breath they work on down the nose to when you go to check out this little box pops up and all you have to do is click apply coupons that's all you have to do honey has saved it's 17 million members over two billion dollars and they support over 30,000 online stores in conclusion I would highly recommend honey it's literally free money and it could not be easier to use you just install it and it starts working for you immediately so if you want to check out the sponsor go to join honeycomb slash Danny more visit the link in the description that's join honey calm slash Danny thank you to honey for sponsoring this video and thank you to you guys for checking out honey I endorse honey big-time I have it on my laptop that's right in front of me I think it's a pretty fantastic tool and why wouldn't you download it you know all right well we've looked at the memes we found out how many almonds I need to eat and now it's time for me to eat 30 almonds hmm all right I don't know why my face is so red and got progressively more red throughout the video but you know I think that's nothing that I could eating a hundred almonds a day won't fix so I'll make sure to do that well I hope you guys enjoyed this video if you're new here and you're not subscribed yet make sure you subscribe and turn on my notifications to join Gregg Gregg it's what I call my subscribers that's why I say what's up Greg at the beginning of my videos and if you want to be Gregg then you got to subscribe and you got to turn on those notifications baby they get a Heather Hawkins for turning on my notifications you are truly Gregg see you guys next time with a really interesting video where it turns out that my entire life actually doesn't exist and this has all been part of little Nutcracker guys dream and when he wakes up I'll be gone forever bye

Channel: Danny Gonzalez

Views: 2,929,932

Rating: 4.9755592 out of 5

Keywords: danny gonzalez, funny, commentary, comedy, react, reaction, reacting, awful, humor, memes

Id: pfBC9rIZvqE

Length: 16min 16sec (976 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 30 2020

Reddit Comments

[u/alannabalanna364]

I shall now eat 30 almonds per day. Thank you for this insight Danny.

[u/ilikeeverthingaboutu]

Not to be horny on main or anything but Danny had no right to be this hot in this vid

[u/ilikeeverthingaboutu]

Do you think you could forgive me for my sins?😭🙏