Gym Etiquette 101 [FOR THE NEWBS/NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONERS]

oh yeah what dog I can't believe there's gonna be so many [ __ ] newbies in this damn gym oh dude they don't even know what the [ __ ] they're doing man eat a [ __ ] [ __ ] bro okay okay my chest is gonna deflate because all these [ __ ] newbies are taking all the benches bro it's freaking idiot freak cars are on my frigging [ __ ] bro we got fat [ __ ] on the treadmill my [ __ ] needs to be on that [ __ ] treadmill bro these gym newbies taking up my [ __ ] machine bro my [ __ ] benches that's what I'm upset about who is this she just posted a new video perfect forum [ __ ] hurt emojis oh these gym newbies though taking up spaces in my gym bro my channel my box will probably offend you and I was definitely supposed to have a story time Saturday for you guys yesterday but we had a very long car ride from California all the way back to Arizona and by the time I got home it was like seven o'clock at night and my bedtime is 8:00 o'clock but I figured New Year's is coming up people are gonna be wanting to go to the gym why not make a gym etiquette list for the newbies and for the people who have been going regularly who have absolutely no excuse to not no gym etiquette I will get the newbies the benefit of the doubt and the people who are regular who do these things well I will scowl at you and mind my own business really but do all the newbies you don't know cases into this list I know I didn't know all of this stuff when I first started going to the gym but before I start let me just talk to the fellow asshats who are like the asshat from the beginning of this video shut the I don't know why that f-bomb just got censored out because we use a crap ton of them in the beginning of this video but that's besides the point we all know that I'm not the biggest fans of New Year's resolutions because people usually never stick to them but I am all for people trying to change no matter what time they decide to change your paying member I hope you stick with it I am going to support you if you are trying to change that's awesome get in there and say fu to the back to the people who like to complain about the newbies being in the gym we all know that most of them don't stick to it it's sad to say but that's the reality of the topic they get bored in about two weeks and by the third week if they are seeing a completely flat stomach they just drop out like I said that sucks but at the same time it's reality I worked at gyms most of my adult life usually two to three weeks people start falling off if it really upsets you that much get a good home workout for a while it's probably gonna give your body a really good needed break and you know in about two three weeks go back to the gym we will all live I promise you that so shut up and enjoy the video make sure to share and spread the awareness of gym etiquette Nesmith etiquette niche so we can all have a blissfully sweet time in the overcrowded gym for about two or three weeks alright let's go one clean up your [ __ ] this is not your mom's house okay I'm sure that she cleaned up after you and didn't teach you how to be a good person but it's time to learn throw away your paper towels wipe off your butt cheeks sweat from the machines if you decide with your brain that you are going to put weights on a machine with your hands then you put that [ __ ] away because you took it out I can't count how many times some complete asshat decided to load the weight press with every single 45-pound plate on the machine and then they do one set they have to ask that set all while screaming during the half-assed set then they stand up they look around to see if anyone's looking at their little performance yes we all are cuz you're weird then they walk off like this and in my five-foot-two you ask what these hands have to take every single 45 pound plates off the machine because you wanted to acts like you were the rock for about 5 milliseconds no I don't work at gyms anymore but I can feel free staff because I have to do that for quite a while because an ass hats like that too loud phone conversation if I can hear your whole phone conversation through my Disney trap remixes you're too loud honey I don't care people talk on the phone do what you need to do to get through your car do your workouts but if people can hear you from the other side of the room or through their earphone you're annoying and I'm pretty sure you're doing it because you won't be able to hear you and you want the attention seriously I had this dude all the time caught himself right next to me while I do cardio while there's all these other cardio equipment that he could use he has to be right next to me opens his phone he starts talking about all the deals that that he's making yeah man we're gonna make so much money with this deal lots and lots of money it's boss man we're going to be live the life with all our deals because we're gonna make lots of money from the deals with Amar's money cars you like money or car clothes I'm gonna be able to buy a lot of those because I'm making deal making deals Disney shop remixes that's all I want to hear not about your deal just talk like a normal person on the phone or maybe put the phone away and focus on your workout I don't know that's the hint three interrupting people's workouts this is gonna be mostly toward men yep I'm singling you guys that because when you guys see a very beautiful woman in the gym some of you just can't help yourself this can still be applied to the women but come on tell me in the comments section we always see the men in corrupting the pretty girls work out let's just be honest this is the safe place slightly safe all right it's not safe sorry you see this in people's ears right here these things don't talk to them if you go like this to someone and they do this they don't want to talk to you if you have ignored the past you tips I just gave you and you decided to still walk up to them and do this favorite hand gesture of mine initiating them to take off their earphones because you want to talk to them during their workout because it's obviously a life-and-death situation and you decide this say hey you look really pretty and they say thanks and turn and/or walk away from you that means they don't like that they don't want to talk to you and they think that you're creepy just focus on your workout or speaking of creepy don't be creepy do not compliment anything from below here right there nothing from here down and do not compliment on a woman in the gym and even then it will come off as creepy this is not a club girls are self-conscious they have no drinks in them and you're going to come off as awkward and weird most of the time don't stare at people if you do happen to stare at someone do not keep staring at them don't follow people around the gym don't say things like oh you got a boob job nice night boobs nice kiss girl real life someone has said that there's real men out here in the gym saying things like that that I have to mention that huh but I do because there's real men that do things like that five making fun of people or their workout focus on yourself look give me your head look focus right here focus on you right there tell me that you've never done something wrong or embarrassing at the gym exactly you can't I have fallen I split I've done wrong form of these machines wrong Excel falling off machines it happens when you're new the whole falling situation still kind of happens to me if you're making fun of someone doing something wrong you are just a little bit of an a-hole if you're making fun of someone's size their look their appearance what kind of work out there doing whatever and that person is minding their own damn business you are an a-hole unless it's something super weird which takes me to my next point if you don't want attention or people looking at you don't light yourself to get that attention if you decide to work parents all the way up your rectum and they get upset that people are looking at you I'm talking to you if you decide to wear a wife beater but it's not enough it's not showing off your sweet pecs enough and you just like to cut into that wife-beater so that your hairy chest and pink nipples are exposed showing off your games bro expect someone to probably stare laugh and make fun of you if you wear a shirt that says [ __ ] you on it expect me to come up to you during your workout whether you're in between a set or not and asked you where you got it because I want to purchase it and yes these are all real life situation my ultimate that I used to work out in LA Fitness in California we have this full-on like six foot man come to the gym with a blonde wig on his head the weight was in two ponytails he wore a straight-up purple white and blue Lee it's hard you wear gloves little ribbons on them painting his nail pom-pom socks and he was you forward roll back handspring jumps while you're doing the splits repetitively all the way down this aisle in the middle of the gym center stage and after he would do a routine he would do this to himself [Music] and you know what I did all of my workout I was in a trance I couldn't stop watching so if you're doing things like that just expect people so look at you talk about Jeff and probably laughs don't sting this right here if you are female I need a mids one for extra strength use it I do I have no shame I sweat a lot this also goes for women who love to just soak their whole body in a bathtub full of perfumes it's a little too much you're not at home think of other people eight sitting on equipment I don't mind if people sit on equipment but if you're just sitting there and two minutes goes by the new decison start texting as you sit on the machine and then the spicy you know call up mid need have a fun five ten-minute conversation as you sit on the machine and your does well do away like it's a lounge chance but it's not allowed sure it's an exercise machine a piece of equipment that other people probably want to use no problem if you want to lounge around and talk on the phone of the gym but maybe just step to the side or go go to Starbucks and lounge and talk on the phone just a suggestion don't have to do it you're still welcome in the gym just be aware that you lounging on a machine some people are kind of shy they're not like me I usually just ask you using that not let me sweat on it and people move but some people are are shot so maybe just move which leads us right on over to number nine sharing if someone asks if they can work in with you let them not machines react have to like load on you know plates to accommodate that person's specific weight needs but I mean machines that have the pin were it's very easy to change the weight share the machine it's not your machine everybody's machine to share specially when the gym is packed you cannot just harvest the machine and call it your precious for 45 minutes sherry yes mEagle you I've had grown hairy Ackman tell me know that they don't want to share a machine I used to be like oh okay now I'm like well sorry sir because that was just more of a a nice question to ask because I'm I'm gonna just go into this machine and finish this thing and a lot of junk is actually in there rule is for you have to share so go tell on me a 5 foot 2 little hobbit check and see how manly you look share the [ __ ] ting Jonah Valhalla this is actually kind of my issue I love to take the pins 15 and 20 and lay them all around the bits that I'm using because I need oh them for various different exercises but the difference with me is that I go to the gym very early there's like 4 people there when I go it's not a packed gym and no one's looking to get the dumbbells now if I do have 3 sets of dumbbells and someone just happens to walk to the dumbbell rack and look all you know disgruntle that there's no tins 15 their twenties guess what I'm gonna do relinquish one of my sets to them because I've got three sets of dumbbells because I have fabulous gym etiquette and now for our grand finale our last one that's gonna take us into the New Year be naked but not for long look it's a dressing room I get that you're gonna see a little meat you know a little extra skin penises vaginas boobies that's what I'm talking about but there is absolutely no reason at all to just prance around the dressing room completely naked all about talking to people while you flop around nobody likes it and everyone thinks it's weird ladies don't slap your foot on the couch what about a shaver and start shaving your vagina all while in the open yes I've seen that in the female locker room men don't use the blow dryer to dry off your nutsack yes people that's real life to the gym is not your home wash off get dressed and go shave your vagina and and dry off your nut sack with your blow dryer at your house not in front of other people you guys realize that sometimes children walk in there that's scary that will scar someone don't do that so those are my top gym etiquette tips pet peeves issues that I wanted to share with you guys did I miss any of them if I did tell me in the comments section do you agree with mine and what are your gym etiquette set maybe I'm missing something and I'm out of the loop so tell me in the comments let's help everyone out and make this new year smooth sailin and sweaty and probably very crowded for the new year remember guys bye no new year's resolution challenge is up on my website until the new year so make sure to submit that up before I snapchat all and remember you do not have to be a size 2 abs are great to have but they are not needed to be healthy biceps are amazing to just scare away all the boys but biceps don't equal optimum health they're just fun but health is very important and if you're striving to be better physically mentally and health-wise and your goal is to get into the gym this New Year's I am all for it please do and let me know how it goes I want all my subscribers and Instagram followers to be as healthy as they can be and on that note Happy New Year everybody it will be 2019 the next time I release a video let's make this New Year up [ __ ] bomb 1 yes we're going into the new year with a little bit of a potty mouth and I'll see you guys next year [Music] [Applause] [Music]

Channel: My Thoughts Will Probably Offend You

Views: 196,462

Rating: 4.5755033 out of 5

Keywords: Gym etiquette, gym etiquette 101, gym tips, gym etiquette for beginners, new years resolutions, michelle mcdaniel, gym etiquette 101 for newbies, my thoughts will probably offend you

Id: BQLStuxHXM0

Length: 16min 26sec (986 seconds)

Published: Sun Dec 30 2018