Graham Norton Funniest Moments (23)

tonight a sexy rock legend so the ladies are feeling a bit frisky here they are [Applause] big shock we saw you I think I loved it was so lovely how emotion grow so was the idea that like there was no way nownself 2 could be possible yeah yes they're supposed to be the best team in the world and they are really they're brilliant team if you know your football they're the best team to watch it's you know it's to take them on and actually beat them is just wonderful view at the air thought you'd have the footage here you go they've just 100 video [Applause] who's the big guy beside you my best mate is a second-hand car dealer called big honest out is that the pinnacle of the dream now or are you hoping that go all the way well if you know just say they can go away now get into the last 16 of Champions League we have a game games pin fika which I'm sure you know about yes of course which I'm sure Cameron knows I know but Jude knows what he's talking about because he was voted the sexiest man alive dear you was she a friend of mine that's when I know but I'm not 13 a friend of mine took that and had it printed on a toilet seat shows you what you thought of me is it in your toilet yeah that's funny functions [Laughter] [Applause] well such as my life no no no no no no no no hablas sexiest woman alive [Applause] why did you do this why are you smelling your finger [Laughter] so sexy [Music] but I think and this is great to you look at me on the cover of that magazine but winning you're in high school isn't it's truth it's like you struggled to get dates when you're in high school teacher who kind of had to bully her son into asking you out oh god Mike's gonna hate the story yeah I went to public school like a normal school but I also had a studio teacher on set and she made her son Michael Resnick take me to like a spring formal cuz I never went to school dance and I always wanted to I think I was like a senior at the time and I was like I want to go to a dance and I was like come on take me and he's like no no so come on take me no like literally and I was like aren't you're taking me like we're done like you have to do this so she made her son take me what's his name Michael Michael resident Michael you must hate yourself man why you like he's fine yeah but he's not dating you you would a bit car crazy - well I was the kid with the car pictures on my wall the pole I always loved cars and so the first thing I did when I had me a little cash was get a beautiful Porsche that I had always dreamed of and the car was brand-new and my friend who played a dog face on and played Turk on the show Scrubs thought it would be funny to play a practical joke on me and there's a show called punk did you have Punk'd you did yeah oh they got me really horribly bad they the things like three days off a lot and I was going to a liquor store with him was all set up hidden cameras I didn't know obviously and some teenagers asked us to buy them booze cuz you know you can't drink - you're 21 in the States and and I was like no we're not gonna buy you booze I'm not gonna be responsible for you guys getting hammered and when we came out of the liquor store the brand new car appeared from my perspective to be completely covered with graffiti and I and the kids were just finishing doing it like ruined and the whole thing had been choreographed with the hidden cameras and such that that I wouldn't be able to catch the little [Laughter] [Applause] and I and I couldn't see from my perspective because my adrenaline was so pumping that he looks up and he's like a little boy I stopped because I didn't realize he was so young and they ended that whole bit out because they don't really want you beating up children honey one funny one more thing about that stories that we went into the when we went into the the liquor store that my co-star who played the turkic Donald Faison he he knew he was on camera cuz he was the guy on the joke and when we walked in the liquor store there's a giant rack of porn it's the first thing you see when you walk in and I walk in I'm with my buddy and I'm like I'm like magazines DVDs my boss probably and so I walk over to the rack cuz I'm like wow look at all look at this check out this card my friend who knows he's on hidden cameras like oh man you know I'm not into that I mean I'll be strolling your shoes shoes have you hidden your of you [Applause] that old trick [Laughter] [Applause] here so Clara is that's me you and Johanna yes that's me is that how you say Johanna no no Swedish Oh No and your sisters yes and so first time I played you on the radio I just assumed you were kind of sort of an indie band from America so did you just grow up listening to all that American music well I well we can I became obsessed with that music when when I was about 12 okay and then but a lot of people think it comes from our parents but they didn't know more punk punk rock oh yeah yeah screw your parents nothing to do with them that is from the album stay gold whichever you haven't heard this album it's just beautiful I just do it every day my wife is gonna freak out that I touched you [Applause] do I have your pet H you'd put in a predictive text probably just because it never works I mean you know just the time any times you spent just trying to get I'm we useless at it anyway but the idea of predicting words that I've never heard of has the ones I really want so it means everything is done through actually three times or four times as long to do the thing that's supposed to save your time notice once well I've discovered the Cole and anal and Cocker all the same you can say a couple more words on a British talk so the new County Fair you'll pay hate talking inna [Applause] it's got a kick off I hate those people that wear the bluetooth earpiece the wireless one all the time even when they're not on the phone they just sort of walk around with it in I find that incredibly annoying when you put that in your room yoshua drivers a nightclub bouncer London's really shutting down few down yeah no no I reckon I am no-brainer no bring up yeah Xavier Z singles out the albums out and the new single is at Moncton resound yes when's that when soon isn't it yes very soon probably in the near future in the near keep an eye out the two of you because Carrie Fisher actual Princess Leia yes that is her dog yeah yeah can you see its tongue yes yeah a hundred percent of the time he has a fully distended tongue and it's dry and she kind of flicks it you know she gives it a flick here and there in the fiddle I measure she was talking about Gaia Fisher because she loved that's her dog's name Gary Fisher and she she knows a Fisher and she was going I just loved this dog so much I love him better than all my dogs I don't know why I love him so much and I was nervous and I don't he just met her and I went well you know I mean maybe it's because of his tongue you are single and he seems to like you but no because that one of the last red copper chocolate was a Chanel dress which is an amazing looking dress yeah you look like a Christmas cracker yeah yeah that's been pulled at the prize was your feet yes it was a corset so it's not an optical illusion I mean leggo you I was going out to lunch in it afterwards where we went to an Italian restaurant and I had to polonaise because why wouldn't you and suddenly you realize like normally in clothes you know your tummy might get a bit bigger if you eat a Bolognese can't do it and of course it it can't like it just stays up here so the belching that was happening afterwards was absolutely scrapping you think I know that doing like so many corset films and like period films I might have learned but I didn't know you yourself Samuel you've had a lot of looks over the years a lot of bold fashion statement I would say I was hosting the BT Awards one year and I was channeling Nicki Minaj doing a beez in the trap I started you know my back to the camera so it's just the hair and the lyrics and beads in the television they told me turn around everybody had a good laugh this this is a more recent one the story behind this is fabulous so that you're wearing this t-shirt oh that t-shirt I was doing press for Captain America and I was in Atlanta in a studio alone and I've been doing press all morning you know the remote things and you don't see the people just mean a camera in studio and this guy came on Sam Rubin from LA and the Superbowl had been that past Sunday and he asked me about the commercial that I was in that I enjoy the commercial I was in that Sunday you know I wasn't in a commercial and the only commercial I remembered was large Fishburne you own a car commercial dressed as like Morpheus or whatever again and so I just happen to say well I'm not large Fishburne and I was not in a commercial and I'm not that other black guy who's in that you should know who you're interviewing good time and everybody said I was irate and I embarrassed him but I got a lot of calls from a lot of people in Hollywood really hate him and said well you could be forgiven for losing your temper because it's been going on a long time well fish and I have been going through this for like you said a very long time he and I've been standing together when people came up to him and start talking to him about Pulp Fiction in the 80s not everyone looked backward in the 80s now before I reveal the rest of the couch [Laughter] I'll do I'll do a little bit of self-harm this this is me in the 80s I was never a jockey I don't remember that time in my life this this will frighten you this is mr. Harry Hill in the a she's cloning weird kind of dogs that can talk it was taking longer longer to wash my face basically very wide middle parting meanwhile in Leicester latest gentleman a young footballer had just stepped onto the pitch [Applause] were you serious when you told us what your fear is I mean it's a good fear it's I think it's a founded fear I think it's a founded fear it is tell us what this I have a phobia of being chased around with poop on a stick we've all got started when I was a kid was just weird parenting for some reason kids thought it was funny to stick a stick and dog poop and chase each other everything but that scared the crap out of me because of the cleanliness problem of it was writing sticks jeremy renner though yours is brilliantly specific and I think we without knowing it I think we probably all share it we may I don't know I I didn't have the the fear when I was younger because we've all go through this but it's when a little child and I'm the oldest of seven kids and I got a lot of little Rugrats running around and these little roaches start losing their teeth and they get a little Wiggly and they like to show me like this little dagger pooping in and out of their mouth and look up the German I want to pull this thing out I'm like I get out of your freaking but don't you think that is really freaky I use thumb it just really kind of gross to me at the cutest little thing and the planet starts to do like the creepiest thing on the planet and then I get out of here your tie the string to my thing to the doorknob I get out of your creep look we'll have this you know the dreams your teeth pull up I don't know what it means anybody wanna means we get bigger and ones not me I don't know your change share of money I think I think that's what the fear of money [Applause] what are you afraid of well I was gonna go with flying but I think I'll go with girls over 12 [Applause] [Laughter] [Applause] [Laughter] [Applause] [Laughter] the last minute of my life I wouldn't have predicted that is it Mark Ruffalo [Laughter] I've always hated the Hulk he [ __ ] [Laughter] my son said that to me the other day when he was mad at me I always hated the hog I think he's [ __ ] you just told him that he's afraid of girls over 12 we ask the audience about their biggest fears and let's let's just delve amongst just recovering before you say anything Ruffalo will take you down okay okay so hands up if you've got if you've got a fear we asked me for a nice lady here what are you afraid of are you one of those people who can't get the pills out of the bottle no it's just in bags and when someone takes the Powell out and it starts making that noise oh oh yeah that no they like that noise who was over here and I say to here what are you afraid of um bread sweat bread sweats bread sweat what's bread sweat all right I'll set the scene when you've made toast then you put it on the side and lift it up and it's all wet and the crumbs and just you're afraid of that I have a fear of loose change let's find another home it's the sound of change in people's pockets or anything like that so if I'm given change in my hand before a receipt I tend to just throw up in the air [Applause] see that dr. garages in shorts on watch on Monday the 2nd of February we've got a clip this is a vertebra beating a cheetah next we investigate another amazing claim the cheetahs ability to run at speeds of 70 miles an hour is that really possible cheetahs are beautiful athletic looking that they've got streamlined body small head elongated legs and narrow shoulders and a very long spine this looks like an animal that's built for speed but exactly how fast telephone it was in a restaurant tasting the wine the whole bottle thank you was there a man just out of salt with a gun a big rope a stick if you let the animal call the tune that's the point you let it decide how come you don't force it and you can't tell whether an animal that you know is that way or not well it is a couch full of animal lovers tonight Jessica you've got a lovely dog what's your dog called Chaplin Chaplin oh there now Chaplin is very special tell us why he's special well I got him from a rescue organization he was hit by a car when he was a puppy so he only has three legs and I called name Chaplin because when he sits down his takes his leg and sits like this like Chaplin with this cave oh the front is it the front leg yeah so what happens when he wants to do we keep balances on two legs [Laughter] actually true that you are looking after a pet at the moment oh that one yeah yes well and yes we had a thing on the show you know I'm doing stars in their eyes and we had a contestant who had a phobia of cucumbers and so we got this because they can be quite aggressive so I got this cucumber and I've been training it so it wouldn't be aggressive and try get well I can give you okay thanks ed you can tell with cucumbers though when they're aggressive you can sense their energy you feed off their readiness you should let the cucumber to come to you I've been trained I've been training it if you could take the lid off Graham and if you can see it there oh yes quietly [Music] Oh [Applause] well I guess I guess I'd certainly was used to read that comic when I was a kid so I I knew that was always true about my sort of feeling for it but I think that if for me you know working fast like from Belfast just to even be an actor was already such an amazing kind of leap of faith my parents were kind of amazing they thought if you're an actor it meant that you were about to be unemployed homosexual and broke well does include the idea that think about directing some great big movie like Thor but even in Thor you didn't take your Shakespeare house often you because Chris Hemsworth yes it usually made him do some well you know he he's an absolutely amazing looking fellow yes you know and what I mean even I had to sometimes sit down and you know have a quick rubdown of the Radio Times [Applause] the expression yeah he had all of those good looks but he's amazing proper proper actor and we we wanted to feel that thought somebody people would follow into the jaws of death and so although a lot of the part was about swinging your hammer effectively yes and he has both an enormously impressive hammer and and a great gift with it he was to take on board you know using the language a fantastic kid in a sort of straight up and down movie star really amazing guy but ready to do all of it a real sort of worker who wanted to be not just look it but be able to sort of feel it as well as n he's ever looking for a you know keep fit advice is that you want some experts oh yeah my abs are just outright yes top tips in the gym well I got inspired you know like I think most people you go in waves were like this is gonna be the time where I'm gonna get in that crazy shape and I and I and I went to the gym and I was working out and and I had chosen a day when all of a sudden randomly Arnold Schwarzenegger walked into the gym when he was the gum I knew I was in the right year right try to put some more weights on so I would look more impressive I think he knew the gym owner is something and he was taking a tour or something and he approached me and and I don't know if he knew me as an actor or just he was like you know who's the governor like hello citizen what are your goals with your workout so responds but I've retreated to this just very little boy place and I was like well to be honest um Arnold if I could have anything I'd really like to have did you ever see the movie Fight Club like the way Brad Pitt's abs looked in Fight Club and he said without hesitating he said that's that's all diet you have to eat a lot of carrots okay of course in my mind I'm like Arnold Schwarzenegger he's like Miss Universe I mr. universe so I ran home and I bought a [ __ ] ton of character eating them for weeks but nothing nothing ever happened No

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Keywords: Graham Norton Funniest Moments (23), graham norton funny moments, graham norton funniest guests, graham norton avengers, graham norton funniest moments compilation, graham norton denise f, graham norton, the graham norton show full episodes

Id: To8Kyjs1pgE

Length: 28min 56sec (1736 seconds)

Published: Wed Nov 22 2017