EVERYTHING IS BROKEN - Age Of Empires 3: Definitive Edition Is A Perfectly Balanced Game W/ Exploits

oh and look it's the french explorer thomas albert however unlike our explorer the french explorer is stuck in the terrain of the map oh god this game hello there ladies and gentlemen and welcome to the brand new age of empires free definitive edition now it's been a while since i've played age of empires free but guess what they've released a brand new game just like age of empires 2 definitive edition this is a classical rts game which everyone knows and loves but with brand new modern graphics which look exceedingly overbloomed and apparently fixes to the game as well as some new additions but naturally they've added two new ai factions these two new ai factions are ridiculously overpowered in comparison to the current balance because they've nerfed everything which was crazy about the last version of the game meaning that these two new factions are pretty damn stupid naturally we're not going to be playing these two new factions because instead we're going to be having fun and breaking this game in a very stupid way because after all what's the most overpowered thing in this game other than destroying the ai yep that's right the ai in this game is completely and utterly stupid this is a game released in 2020 i'd like to remind you and the ai simply does not function now spiff come on what do you mean the ai doesn't function well you see in a lot of games in rts games in particular developers like to make the ai cheat so they have an actual decent chance against the player in this game however something's gone wrong something's gone really really wrong because on certain maps the ai physically can't even do anything they just sit in the corner crying whilst the player amasses a vast quantity of wealth and then eventually goes up to them and seal clubs them to death and that's exactly what we're going to be showing off today and what better way to demonstrate seal clubbing than with an age-old rivalry that's right with the lovely british playing out of london and we're going to be playing against a random personality nope it's the french long time rivals led by napoleon we're going to panel beat them into the ground so hard they're never going to play age of empires 3 again now we're playing on the ceylon man but literally any map which has a large quantity of water works here but ceylon is definitely the most broken map to play against the ai with now we're going to be playing on the medium difficulty because that's generally how games are meant to be balanced around and it's just going to be us versus napoleon that's it that's generally all there is in this game we don't need to make it any more complicated just myself and napoleon about to have a really fun 1v1 to settle the age-old dispute of whether tea is superior to baguette i mean logically i don't really know why there's much comparison to be made considering both are absolutely lovely but apparently it needs to be settled nonetheless on the field of battle so without further ado let's throw ourselves into the game ladies and gentlemen as always make sure you sat back relaxed with a nice warm cup of tea in hand and if you have a baguette near you or anyone who is in any way sympathetic to the french then make sure that they leave the room for the next 30 minutes otherwise they might be offended by the cyberbullying that they're about to see anyway let's throw ourselves into the game if you're feeling especially fantastic my goodness you can even give this video a like now naturally the developers of this game were very smart you see because they decided to not give me an early access copy of the game very good developers very intelligent i like the strategy they employed there there was just one slight issue it didn't stop me that's right i've still found a way to completely and utterly destroy this game in a very unfair way all right fantastic we've got our first dock up and running which means we're gonna hire ourselves a couple of fishing boats just to send on out into the wider world and generate some resources for us meanwhile we want as many little settlers as we can split gathering wood or getting berries from bushes now we have this tiny little catamaran here and we're going to be using this catamaran to actually move our explorer onto the main island which is quite easy considering the main island is literally just right here there we go let's get rid of the explorer perfect stuff now our island is just absolutely surrounded by fish but i'm not actually looking for fish at the moment i'm looking for something different i'm looking for wales and i don't mean the kind that sticks off the side of england i mean the money-making kind now of course age of empires 3 unlike previous age of empires games is in fact a deck building game i know it doesn't make much sense but it's a deck building game and i have built myself a naval deck which is perfect for any sea based map naturally on my naval deck we're going to be picking up the whale oil bonus this means our lovely fishing boats gather 35 faster from whales what are whales well whales are an infinite source of gold if you can get yourself a fishing boat plonked down on top of them you're gonna be in the money and there we go oh wait hang second there's a rival fishing boat it's a french catamaran ladies and gentlemen right naturally we're gonna try and chase this down with our own catamaran for some reason they sailed in range of our town center so that's the entire french naval fleet just sunk right there okay he's gone down into the ocean rest in peace for h davey oh what's this we found a japanese zen temple on the island of ceylon probably historically accurate and actually we're going to do as all colonizing powers would do and just slap down a massive european trading post on this beautiful bit of mother nature anyway now that we have our lovely whaling technology sorted we're able to slap down our fishing boat on a whale and guess what it's making 0.68 gold per second now that's fantastic but of course as you can probably guess that's not enough we're going to need more so we're going to be building four fishing boats and slamming them all onto this one little whale and now that we have this trading post set up we're going to be generating some gold from it as well we can also naturally steal their society's fantastical bonuses making all of our units stronger and honestly we don't need to do that just yet instead let's go tiger hunting because why not there we go oh look it's so spiff the legendary explorer wabam he just murdered a very rare and endangered species i hope you feel happy with yourself i know david attenborough is not happy right now i'm going to be researching gill nets this is going to increase the coin we're generating from wales which is lovely stuff food production on the island is going quite well as well although we might as well move all of our food production over to actually fishing instead technically speaking napoleon has a higher score than i do meaning he's actually beating me in the game however he's not because you see napoleon is an ai you see the french ai can only get so far before they are completely and utterly destroyed oh and look we found a bhakti temple here lovely these are our lands but we will permit you to build a trading post here to forge an alliance between our peoples ah yes that's always how it started in history one little trading post and then suddenly your entire culture is destroyed ah colonization oh my god what a mess how did those things get into a museum hmm anyway we're gonna be advancing to the commerce age now it's actually going to allow us to gain a lovely little bonus because we can pick between these lovely guys to actually level up too we're going to actually pick up the philosopher prince he's going to give us some crates of food and that's going to allow us to research into the next era faster which is always great news actually not we should probably build ourselves a house because we need more population cap and after the upgrade with the fishing nets our lovely boats are making 0.75 gold per second that is just lovely stuff indeed oh and also guess what we're able to teach our peasants a culture of vegetarianism meaning villagers gather from berry bushes 40 faster currently they're picking up 0.67 food but now they pick up 0.94 oh food per second that's perfect stuff yep we've got the berry boys up and running we might as well also build ourselves a market because we're going to need a few economic upgrades and i'll tell you what we could probably also get a few more fishing boats set up why not now napoleon has also made it to the second era but honestly it's fine napoleon won't be posing an issue for us because we've also just made it to the second era and what we're going to do in the second era is pick up the lovely caravel bonus you know we might as well also pick up the improved warships bonus and we can pick up offshore support as well but that's a bit later on now you see we've picked up this caravel bonus and it's a card and basically after a small set of time we will have a caravel just randomly appear now caravals are great because like fishing boats you can use them to gather resources but more importantly we're going to be able to use them to get a nice group of peasant settlers over to the mainland here and get them harvesting all of the mainland's resources and there we go with that bonus we have two more caravels as you can see we just set one immediately to gold production and were bam 0.75 gold per second this one here instead is going to actually take a nice portion of our berry bush farmers it's going to send them over to this lovely untamed land to naturally harvest all of its rare resources until there is nothing left why do we need these resources well it's just so that we can fight the french speaking of which they've got a scout on this land we're going to naturally be hunting down that scout because we can't possibly let the french get onto the mainland that would be the worst thing that could possibly ever happen all right and there we go now that we have all of these lovely villagers that have just landed on this fantastic new world territory we'll set another caravel to fishing and all of these lovely guys we can just have them build a little manor house we can get more peasants made and set the vast majority of them to cutting down every single tree we find oh and look it's the french explorer thomas albert however unlike our explorer the french explorer is stuck in the terrain of the map oh god this game we're going to send our lovely settlers over here out to start harvesting up these berry bushes anyway we're going to pick up the next bonus for long fishing lines we'll also train up a few more fishing boats because the more the merrier really so we can just send them off to harvest every single bit of fish in this ocean and oh my goodness this poor little french explorer that's what you get for fighting sir spiff do you have any idea how many endangered species this man has finished off okay you stand no chance my friend and come on there we go he's got two health wa-bam there we go perfect stuff oh what's this it's a french fishing boat right naturally our caravel's going to broadside that well bam there you go that will teach you fishing boat for sailing in waters that you should not have access to and actually using this caravel what we're going to do is sail on over to the french island just destroy whatever random bit of civilization they actually have french island is somewhere around here oh there we go fantastic there's one of their mills i see one fun thing we can do is we can attack random french peasant farmers and it's not considered a war crime because this is an active combat zone ladies and gentlemen oh my goodness now the french are technically fighting back but luckily what we're going to do is we're going to start attacking any random french boats we see in the sea the reason we're doing this is because the more french boats we knock out the less french boats we'll be seeing because our starting islands have a limited supply of resources how limited well they're ridiculously limited because we don't have that many trees what happens when all your trees are gone well suddenly you've got no more wood now ladies and gentlemen i've just spoken to her majesty the queen herself and apparently we've got a once in a lifetime opportunity apparently after the lovely exploits of the spiffing brit in the new world of ceylon the supply of whale blubber is now at an all-time high meaning for the first 7 000 people to like this video you will receive an entire ton of whale blubber it will be air dropped onto your house via artillery mortar so make sure to be ready to enjoy your brand new new world commodity oh my goodness what if it is this game if you've actually played this game give me a shout at the copyright section by the way because i'd actually love to hear if anyone who's actually played any age of empires games have decided to buy this game because honestly i think i'd rather prefer age of empires too right now we're going to take ourselves up to the third age because why not and naturally we can pick ourselves up another free caraval that's going to be dropped off oh speaking of which is that the french one yep that's the french one don't really have to do anything to fight it our caravals are vastly superior and there's no real benefit for us actually attacking them oh my goodness what's this a whole bunch of french archers have arrived oh my goodness the french are actually planning on doing something this game now this is exciting so we're going to need to build ourselves a bit of technology to defend us and by that i mean an outpost or could i just train units here i suppose that would work too now we're getting attacked by a whole bunch of french cross women but it's not really going to pose much of a threat to any of our plans because the french have very limited resources they're going to basically sit on their island until they can get a strong foothold in the center and because they're going to just be dwindling out on supplies of wood they're never going to actually be able to get onto the mainland which means they can never win anyway let's send in our lovely random assistant unit to just uh fight to the death here oh my goodness what is wrong with the ai why are you just focusing on this one house this house isn't gonna break the back of my economy you're getting stabbed in the sides fight the unit attacking you not the nonsense oh goodness okay right so the ai sometimes leaves a lot to be desired i'm not going to lie well that was interesting to say the least anyway we're going to get more of our caravels and fishing boats set up so they can harvest more whales i mean we've got a free caravel over here so we might as well send that to um gather up some more whales as well got a whale somewhere around here yeah there we go perfect a lovely humpback whale you see just like in real life humpback whales are a source of infinite gold isn't that lovely now that's a bit of life advice that you can use if you want to completely and utterly destroy this planet oh god please don't please don't all right now we're going to send over some lovely fishing boats three more fishing boats over here just to really maximize the money we can make from this humpback whale meanwhile we're starting to actually finish up all of the trees on our starting island this is good because napoleon will be doing the same right around about now you know it's probably a good time that we actually pick up ourselves another bonus i'm thinking we grab ourselves the free frigate here this is going to be just a lovely random free unit just for us which as you can guess is going to provide us with lots of lovely resources actually we're going to be getting this lovely free frigate and it's going to do a great job of basically allowing us to bully the french to make sure they can't ever leave their island to give it a little boost as well we're going to be picking up some naval gunners here these naval gunners are going to basically make it so that our free frigate will never stop murdering things now what we can do is we can actually have a few of our settlers build up a brand new just little town in the middle of nowhere here so we can really amp up the berry bush production i'm pretty sure this is now it for the french they managed one naval invasion onto our island here but after that they won't actually be able to land any more units that's because they've simply run out of resources we can check this by sending the lovely hopewell frigate right the way on over here over to see what the french island is up to would you look at that they're farming at the moment isn't that beautiful oh just look at them farm away lovely peasants now each peasant we murder here is technically oh how much food is wasted quite a bit what's this there's a french boat oh my goodness perfect right let's go sink that now naturally the french have come here to try and attack us um oh no the french boat's been sunk they've decided to attack us with cavalry units which are going to focus entirely on destroying a tower which they won't ever be able to kill and so these cavalry units are going to get murdered now um great job ai let's just do a bombardment i don't know that'll be great well bam that's a dead horse great stuff 11 out of 10 ai really good stuff and we can actually get ourselves into the next era i mean what have we got here we've got the tycoon who can give us chests of 1000 coin that sounds lovely we're going to get the tycoon to get us into the final era of the game now technically napoleon has caught up to us in era free the only issue is um he hasn't actually caught up to us because he no longer has a way to actually get onto the island here although apparently has an explorer sat here oh what's that is that a french privateer lovely now french privateer versus massive english frigates now i wonder who might win this combat encounter now sadly it's not the french uh we also kill their explorer which is great news for us what we're going to do is now sail on round and destroy that port not that they probably have enough resources to actually sail another boat out into the sea but just to be safe we're going to keep our ship sat here i can still see one active tree on their island at least which means they still have some resources and there we go we're in the industrial age perfect the industrial age is brilliant this is going to allow us to use one of england's special bonuses the factories so we're going to actually just buy ourselves a factory to arrive and then i'd actually like to get another factory to come soon so i'm going to spend 350 wooden gold gaining an extra 1000 experience which should be another shipment you know now that we're here we might as well also get a few more fishing boats set up there's a lovely humpback whale over here that's still missing a couple of opportunities to be gold-farmed and look at this all of these little ships making 0.9 gold a second each they only cost us 70 wood so they are very much worth it now of our factory wagon we can just slap that down literally anywhere factories are brilliant they just make so much money now of our additional experience we're going to pick up the robber barons which is going to allow us to build yet another factory now why is a factory good well it's because it produces 5.5 of any resource that you like per second oh and are they french attacking again seriously they dropped off a naval invasion from a fishing boat the french they're really something right send over the frigates now what i can do is summon a random group of militiamen to help defend this colony there you go go militiamen go i feel sorry for the ai they just don't really function at all they just don't really know what to do oh anyway let's kill these hussards these actually some really nice cavalry units what's that you sending a fishing boat over with probably reinforcements i guess yep there we go there come the reinforcements oh my god ai are you okay you don't strike me as being okay at the moment let's just build ourselves another tower why not i don't really know why the french just keep attacking this one location repeatedly it's not like they're making any progress on it but there we go i mean it wastes resources for them and it gets them out of my way so i'm more than happy now with our first factory what we're gonna have this first factory do is focus entirely on food production there we go it's gonna be perfect we're gonna have this factory producing five food per turn this factory here is gonna focus entirely on gold production so that we have a nice base income of wood and food between these two factories when it comes to food production we should actually be completely fine and the reasoning is simple we have all of these lovely peasants over here which are going to be able to gather resources for us and just look at the amount of berry bushes lying around on this island is insane the amount of food we can gain over here and don't even get me started on the amount of gold we're making from whaling so how's the french island life going well it's going great because they brought yet another boat over here we're just gonna naturally eat that into the ground and oh look here come the french well naturally i think it's probably time we actually improve our little villages and give them some extra hit points if we're going to keep getting navally invaded by the french honestly things are going great in our empire right now there's basically nothing we can do at this point to lose the game i suppose with my massive amount of resources lying around might as well actually take up to the final age not that the french are going to be able to even reach this age you know there's a chance in order to get ourselves there we might as well just buy it oh there we go we can take up to the final age what can we research here oh we can get ourselves an advanced hot air balloon chests of 2000 coin a whole bunch of rockets now we're going to get ourselves an advanced hot air balloon that sounds great fun that's going to be the pinnacle of our civilization a single hot air balloon and as soon as we get into this final age oh my goodness with so many bonuses lying around right okay i mean with all of these spare little home city shipments waiting for us we might as well pick ourselves up the refrigeration so that we gather resources even faster i mean we could pick up the yeoman bonus if we wanted to actually do anything with no archers but there's absolutely no need because we just have these monitor ships here these ships are insane so we're just gonna pick up the heavy fortifications and get ourselves two sets of massive artillery ships i mean we're only allowed to actually build two of them but you know you only really need one to win the game so everything will be fine and fantastic we've entered into the imperial age of the final age which is my personal favorite because it means we can research the final imperial monitors bonus here and this is going to stack with all of our various other damage modifiers meaning that the imperial monitor which is a mortar ship will do stupid amounts of damage anyway as we have a lovely advanced hot air balloon i'm going to be sailing him right the way over to the french so we can see what they're up to and there we go with that fantastic bonus the imperial monitors are now improved they're going to be godly powerful guess what we've got two just about to be summoned in out of thin air and here they come our lovely two monitors now these guys a little bit terrifying because we've improved their mortar attack so that it's up to 208 damage equally they have an additional 1 800 hit points which is definitely something that they're not meant to have and their super duper special long ranged attack bonus now does 520 damage which i'm pretty sure is enough to almost one-shot an entire house anyway we're gonna sail the hot air balloon over so that we can actually get eyes on the enemy as soon as we have eyes on the enemy we'll get a lovely bombardment over to hopefully kill a few french peasants now you notice the french ai score is hardly increasing at all and that's because they aren't able to actually gather any resources beyond probably basic gold and food because there are no trees on the island and the ai physically doesn't have the capacity to work out that they need to send settlers to the mainland to gain more resources now we sail our lovely hot air balloon over and oh my goodness look at all of that it's the enemy peasants you know what this calls for a super duper fun bombardment let's go oh look at that that's an entire building destroyed great stuff right now our lovely monitors here are just gonna sit here and harass the lovely french peasants yeah so we're in a perfect spot here because the french can't fight back because they've actually run out of the ability to just make anything so once they for example had a market there emphasis on the had because it's now gone they can't actually make any resources because there are no longer any trees on their island so they can't build new buildings they can't progress any ages and they can't build any boats this has just kind of resulted in them only being able to generate food which has resulted in them just spamming out their equivalent of our settlers i mean they only have one remaining tree on the island and it's only got 19 woods so the ai isn't even going to take it because this is a large supply of resources but they're not able to build any boats to actually sail onto the island for more resources because guess what they don't have any wood because they spent it all on building up an army that they can't even bloody use the ai really does work in mysterious ways bad news is the ai just got a shipment of wooden meaning i know exactly where their peasants are positioned but because they got that shipment in instead of building up boats to get to the mainland they're going to build a fort this is great however i'm in a perfect range to destroy this fort and mean that they can't get any of that wood back their response is to build a house um so that's great air ai really good stuff what a great fight this is absolutely fantastic and fair my goodness we're going to pick up spies so that we can see everything the ai can see there we go this is everything the ai owns we can see it now it's just a whole bunch of civilians sat on a plantation here not able to do anything it's just so dumb it just doesn't make sense what i love is that the air doesn't even fight back like we can just sit here okay there's a whole bunch of cannons here they're in range of us they're not deploying the cannons no said they'll just have their town center attack us it just doesn't make sense ai it doesn't make sense because now all your cannons are dead why don't you fight back ai what is wrong with you why are you just building houses the houses aren't going to help you does this cost so much wood how much does it cost to build a house okay a house 135 wood a fishing boat 70 wood okay you can almost build two fishing boats for every house what a two fishing boats gonna get you two fishing boats are going to get you an ability to move peasants over here to harvest new resources oh my goodness and now look at this bloody horse it's like a skyrim horse it's sat on the edge of the terrain it's a little bit broken anyway uh we have some brand new um imperial manor wars here we're gonna have them do a lovely bombardment on some peasants because why not it looks quite fun i mean who doesn't love a little bit of peasant bombardment uh so yeah it's time to just cyberbully the french ai here as they stand around and harvest food is there anything else we can do to screw them over and i suppose we can increase our gather rates but i don't think that's particularly going to change the world for us at the moment um i think the french are kind of having a little bit of an issue at the moment because they're currently just marching the ai units one by one into the range of our cannons um it's a very unique strategy to just walk all of your peasants onto this one square so they can just stand there to be killed but it has streamlined the process of me actually taking the settlement oh goodness so apparently napoleon now wants to um give up he's handed in his resignation i appreciate that napoleon the issue is um if there's one thing that i like to do is to make you suffer i'm afraid so naturally we're bam we've taken out their town center let's take out this random outpost here which is meant to defend against us oh no you've hit a chip and done a hundred damage devastating can we shoot back please yes we can there we go that's a french outpost dead let's get the next one down and go with that french defense tower dealt with right let's just what's on round here to really express just how dumb the ai is there is a unguarded treasure chest on their starting island which is just free resources okay 15 experience and 15 coin and they didn't harvest it that's the ai in this game now look i really like rts games developers if you made this game great job i love rts games i like the graphical improvements i like the fact you've added in some new civilizations and that's fun that's really fun and i hope that this game does well but if you are releasing a strategy game in 2020 and your ai is worse than a strategy game released in the 1990s then something has gone wrong developers this is not ai that should be in the final product of a game maybe placeholder okay if you're trying things out but the ai should not sit on an island and die oh my goodness what do i rate this game um a 5 out of 10 it's a game might as well just stick to the non-definitive edition unless you really really like the look of the new civilizations and if you are gonna play this game play with friends don't play against the ai just save yourself the time the faf and the suffering play against a friend okay there's nothing to be found in the ai here absolutely nothing i don't even know how this gets past testing i just don't understand like come on there are early access games with better ai than this anyway i've been the spiffing brit this has been a look into whether age of empires 3 is a perfectly balanced game with no exploits or if perhaps something might be wrong with the game and i've reached the conclusion that yes something is very wrong with the game anyway if you enjoyed watching me beat the french senseless in a completely fair and balanced environment then make sure to give this video a like and if you want to see more videos like this then feel free to subscribe to this lovely channel we'd absolutely love to have you as a member of our community anyways always a massive thank you to each and every one of our majestic patrons who make these fantastic videos all the more possible seriously thank you very much thanks to you i decided to buy this game because it wasn't given to me for free and uh sadly i've played too much of it that i can't refund it at this point but oh well here we are so thank you very much for your money because it went straight to this lovely valuable piece of game to just be a fine addition to my steam library and hey if you sat there wondering what video you'd like to watch next look no further than this one on screen now if you enjoyed my very strange look at an rts game then you're gonna love this as well anyway i'll see each and every one of you in the next one have an absolutely lovely day and goodbye for now

Channel: The Spiffing Brit

Views: 624,341

Rating: 4.9164014 out of 5

Keywords: The, Spiffing, Brit, video game exploit, perfectly balanced game, perfectly balanced, strategy game, age of empires, aoe 3, aoe 3 definitive edition, funny, age of empires 3, age of empires iii, spiffing brit, funny moments, the spiffing brit, age of empires 3 definitive edition, aoe 3 de, montage, age of empires 4, video game exploits, age of empires 3 definitive edition gameplay, exploit, age of empires definitive edition, definitive edition, aoe, everything is broken, is broken

Id: 9lCNCiqSNYs

Length: 26min 37sec (1597 seconds)

Published: Tue Oct 20 2020

Reddit Comments

[u/Jokie155]

I really don't know why migration maps are enabled for singleplayer. Island maps do not play nice for the AI, it has been true ever since the very first release of Age of Empires.

I've seen how the AI coding is done, and it seems clear that trying to make it work for island maps that are completely random in generation would be a monumental undertaking for something that isn't even going to be used 80-90% of the time. Map triggers work differently.

Fun for multiplayer, not feasible in singleplayer. Not really a fair assessment of the AI.

[u/sanguine34]

I feel like this isn't really an exploit, it's just focusing on navy to prevent expansion. It also only really works for this map because maps with bigger islands like the Carribbean map would take well over an hour for the AI to use up the resources. There are real exploits into he game that could be shown and as a throw back you could show some from the original AOE3 such as instant spawning cavalry.