- [Announcer] Every quarantine ever. - Day one of quarantine. We've been relaxing and watching movies. - It's really not bad. - I'm excited to spend
more quality time with you. - Me too, baby. (farting) Did you just fart? - No, I sharted. - That's disgusting. Are you gonna change? - No, quarantine life. - That's gross. - Deuces. Arf! Was that too much? - Yeah. - Sorry. I want a divorce. - What, we're not even married. - I'm leaving. - Where are you going? - To the kitchen. Do you even care that I'm leaving? (farting) - Did you just fart again? - Yeah, I did. - [Announcer] I'm recording
this from my closet. - Worked out. - [Announcer] Who needs toilet paper when you've got a perfectly good thumb? - Just do it. Just say it. I know you can do it. I'm not even gonna tell anybody if you do. Just say, "Papa, I love you." Please, I need this. - [Announcer] Every forever alone ever. - Sweet, I'm gonna use
these next few weeks to perfect my Australian accent. Oh, that's a lamp right there, lampy. Plant. Pillows. Oh, it's a couple of
dumb-a-roos right there. Dumb-a-loo, dumbos. Oh, that's a tella. Look at this, this is a nice
40-inch tella right there. Oh, I've got a little Nintendo. Toilet paper, boot, sneaky Daniel, sneak-a-roo, silent boot, gator, Cameron Diaz, tith breesh, tooth breesh,
taith breash, brish be. Oh, that's a tah bah tha
rah tha eeh toh bah thee. Wow, I think I finally perfected it. - [Announcer] Okay, we
need to ration food. We all get one almond. - [TV] Congratulations. You have successfully watched
everything on Netflix. - Oh, okay. - [TV] Because you were
the first to do so, you have been dubbed the King of Netflix. - Oh, sick. - [TV] As King, it is your right to create your very own Netflix show. - Yeah, I'll take that. - [TV] Anything you want,
and we have to make it. The world is yours. You are a big TV exec. Now, tell us your idea. - Um, okay, yes, I do have something. Okay, so it's like Stranger Things, but they've all got really big butts. - [TV] Whenever you're ready. - Stranger Things but with big butts. - [TV] We're ready to hear your idea now. - Are you not ... Stranger
Things with big butts. Stranger Things with big butts. Stranger Things with big butts. Are you ... This could be huge, Netflix, and so could the butts. Big butts equals big bucks. Let's get it did. - [Announcer] I already
practice social distancing. (crying) - [TV] And our top news story
today, cute little puppies-- (phone ringing) - Hello? - Hi there, Karen. This is Harry calling from
your credit card institution. - Uh-huh. - Yeah, we're noticing
some strange activity on one of your accounts, and we're gonna need your
credit card information and social security number
to rectify the situation. - No, I'm sorry, I'm a little too smart to fall for a credit card scam, Harry. - God dang it, you got me. Well, have a nice day. - Wait, don't hang up. - Uh, why? - I don't know, do you
want to talk or something? - Well, what would you want to talk about? - I don't care. It's just kind of nice to talk to someone. Please? - Well, you know, I think I can chat if you gave me your
social security number. - Ugh, fine, but you
better be interesting. - Well, I steal identities
for a living so, I mean, I think I'm pretty interesting. - So how much toilet paper do you have? - [Announcer] Wash your hands. - Ah, screw it. Yeah. Woo, hoo, hoo. Shower time, shower time. Woo, hoo, hoo, hoo, shower time. Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo. No. I don't need to look at my phone. Aw, heck. I wish I knew how to quit you. - [Announcer] So bored. - I miss you so much right now, baby. I wish I could just hold you. - Oh, me too. - Hey, do you wanna maybe, like, get sexy? - Oh, my god, Cody. Like cyber sex? - Yeah, I mean, I don't know, just if you want to. - I don't know. - Please, for me, for Cody? - Well, I mean, normally I'd say no. But given the circumstances and you do look really hot right now. - Wait, for real? Oh, awesome, let's do this. - Cody, I'm so bored. Hang out with me. - Sean, I'm kind of busy. Get out, dude. - No, wait, Sean, stay. - Babe? - Do stuff to each other. It'll be, like, hot. - Uh, I don't know.
- I'm so down. - Please? For me? For Molly? - Okay, I guess, given the circumstances. - [Announcer] I'm not losing my mind. What's that, Smeagol? - [Dog] Another day that mother
must spend at home with me, providing me with walks, treats, and the all-powerful belly rub. The virus is working. Do I feel bad for what I've created? No, I feel happy because mother is home. I should have set this
is motion years ago. - [Announcer] Well, I
had to fight an old lady, but I got this can of beans. - Oh, screw it. You call that a workout? Pathetic. Who are you? I'm your physical insecurities. And if you thought a global pandemic was gonna slow me down,
think again, muchacho. Come on, man. we're stuck in the apartment
for the next month. Maybe this is the perfect opportunity to just relax and take a break. The only break you're
gonna get is your bones when I break your bones. All right. Now, get back to work. Oh, man. - [Announcer] As a seasoned introvert, I have prepared for
this moment all my life. - Well I think we have found our Mercutio, which makes you Tybalt. Oh, don't sulk. Don't sulk. Tybalt is Prince of Cats. - [Announcer] All right,
games I can play by myself. Marco Polo, wait, no. Hide and seek, wait, no. - Hey, babe, just got back
from the grocery store. And guess what. I managed to score an old bag of rice. Suckers. They didn't see this in the back. Oh, god. This tastes disgusting. Who would buy this? - [Announcer] Don't go outside. - Oh, what if I do like ... Well, what else am I gonna do today? Brutal. When did I get all this lipstick? That's pretty. Who is she? She's gonna ... She's like James Bond's girlfriend or something. Oh, that's the spice. Oh, ah. Let's do, like, the Kylie Jenner. You look like the sexy
fish from "Shark Tale". Oh, what have you been doing
all your life, Courtney? May as well. Wait, I'm gonna gloss it. I look like Miranda Sings. Damn it. Who are you going to be? - [Announcer] Xbox Live is down. What do I do? - This has been so hard. I mean, I've already read all of my books. I've rearranged my apartment twice. And I've done 60 thousand push-ups. I'm so bored, I'm going crazy. - Yep, me too, super bored. - I know, right? - Wish I had something to do. - So tough. - [Announcer] Oh, thank
god Animal Crossing's out. - Hey, you guys. Last day of quarantine. How'd you do? - Great. I learned how to play guitar. - Oh, that's awesome. I myself learned a little bit of Spanish. Or should I say, "Apprende
algo de espanol." - Courtney, what did you do? - I spent most of my time on TikTok. - Oh, that's-- - But I finally learned the Renegade. - Cool.
- That's cool. Yeah. - It's really cool that you can do that. - Cool, yeah, that's cool. - It's really cool. - [Announcer] Six feet of distance. - I'm gonna spend the quarantine getting into a new genre of literature. I got into some really weird porn. - [Announcer] Oh, hey, maybe now I can finally start Big Bang Theory. Just kidding, I'm never gonna do it. - Now your turn. Yes, good, again, like I've trained you. - [Announcer] The American government knew about it in January and did nothing. - I am so glad that you guys were all able to make it
for my birthday dinner. I mean, I know we're not
supposed to be hanging out. But the fact that you guys risked it all to come here and see me
just means the world. Best birthday ever. You guys are my best friends. Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday, dear Lisa. Happy birthday to me. That was kind of nice. Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday, dear Lisa. Happy birthday to me. - Okay, this is the snack
girl scene, take one. Sorry the lighting's bad,
but we're trying something. Action. - Shower, shower. Wait, I got socks on. You can see my socks, (beep). Okay. - And if you thought a global pandemic was gonna slow me down, think again, you sick son of a bitch. And if you thought a global
pandemic was gonna slow me down, think again, mother (beep). - But I finally learned
the Renegade dance. (beep), why can't I do it? I just learned this. Okay. No, guys, look, really. Wait, how did that go? (beep) I literally spent the last
half hour learning this. Okay. Boom, boom, boom, ba, ba, ba. Come on, guys, don't leave. - All right. Cool, let's see how that looks. - I am so glad that you guys were able to make it here for my birthdadinner. Why can't I say birthday dinner? - Thank you guys so much
for watching this video. We shot it during our quarantine, all in our separate houses with our phones 'cause that's all we have. And I hope you guys enjoyed it. I hope you guys are staying safe. If you got plenty of
time in your quarantine, check out the video
that we put right there. We picked it just for you. There's a Smosh break down there if you're looking for something comfy in the middle of your quarantine. You've got plenty of time right now, so might as well just
subscribe if you haven't yet. So stay safe, and wash your hands.
One of their best videos. Damn. I loved it so much.
I loved the Monica and Shayne bit!
This is in my top 10 “new” Smosh videos for SURE. Laughed so hard. Also, loved Courtney singing happy birthday while washing her hands, thought that was clever as fuck lol