Craig Ferguson, Nothing Changes if Nothing Changes | TigerBelly 185

[Music] [Music] you guys 23andme is the only DNA site that sponsors Tiger belly you do you know reason why is because we're partakers we're participated gotcha we we partake me I send in my DNA and I got a lot of specifics and Bobby learned that he had percent composition of an elite power athletes and he's most proud of and ten percent Japanese a ninety percent human John Nye if you took it you find out that you were probably eighty ninety percent uh [ __ ] because your [ __ ] hat dude yeah you gotta get it checked out in I think they show like your Neanderthal like answers right there dude you're in the answer Thal John percentage of Neanderthal guys by your kit today at 23andme calm slash tiger belly that's number two three and me calm slash tiger belly again that's 23andme calm slash tiger belly enjoy the show oh that's the way that's okay so um whatever you do in town I don't say anything to us to your name okay Craig do I do I have do did I look like I'm dying of some kind of waterborne no has someone said that to you recently well I I was just I told them I just put my mouth there's something in the guard we'll talk about in a very worried talk about that the same things all right it's bacteria we are we talk about science later 5 or 43 dudududududududududu whoa dude it was my solo thing sorry why did you add a little pom-pom and now you want little bells well okay I was pretty good I guess thank you so much for next time that guy was just doing a solo run you got it all right welcome to another episode white [ __ ] wood what's up you like took a shower and you like you did your hair looks good man yeah and then we got all right over here John nah we don't usually have them but take your hat off John he's got Hitler's haircut it's what are you trying to be pull pot what are you doing do they do it take your hat off let me see Hitler's haircut look at that and what's Hitler's birthday you told me that earlier for 20 who knows we've got Gilbert in the room we've got um we've got kalila and our guest is reading uh let me say something don't say anything yet um I just don't say anything um you know I'll be I be completely honest with you guys I I've had we've had pretty good guests on the show mm-hmm we've had some rockers we've had some UFC fighters we've had you know actors and whatnot um a lot of comedians and this next gentleman I used to go I don't know why he doesn't invite me anymore to his show but um but not like he used to invite me all the time to show and I'm like oh cool I get to do craig ferguson's again right we never did his talk [ __ ] by the way by the way never was invited to you said now listen first of all main attention yeah I stopped doing the radio show in May of last year so that's why you haven't been asked though and I quit last May did you really quit this why I told you I was gonna oh that's what you did say that so that's why I haven't been getting any calls right I also have not been invited on my own and the reason I'm reading this cold coffee thing I'm thinking do I dare drink this I feel I have to have something because I feel I might have a bacterial waterborne bacterial disease because it's gonna tell people how did you tell people yeah okay just he lives on a compound and then you go add well I live I live in a compound you guys know about very wealthy compound I was coming at my comp it's actually it's I'm so wealthy it's at my compound I noticed one of my many garden fentons was blocked up now you know me you know me you love Thailand Bobby you know what I'm like I learned two blocks right and I go crazy I'm like what's the point yeah so I go to the phone and there's a little - but it's a it's a lady oh it's a you know holding a water carrier yeah it's usually a little boy peeing no no it's a it's a lady in a toga pouring a jug of water into another jug of war right so I noticed that the little stream is not working I go ah so I go to the front works in the back and I see the little hose is disconnected so I go to connect the hose and it still doesn't work so I think I must be blocked so then I go and I put it to my mouth and I blow to see if there are leaves or stuff wrong it would you would do right and then I think this is insane there could be bacteria in this war and now that's what I was thinking that's I'm gonna get Pseudomonas a type of bacteria that lives in aquariums or swampy little areas but it can be pathogenic if it goes inside like the human body and I got it remember really sick I was a functionary my breasts I might do that you'd bring your eyes I might have to I mean it's either that or fluid in your breasts now or you live to see another day okay there are antibiotics too but this is my problem antibiotics are becoming less offense all right because if you you your body gets immune to it well no just the bacterias bacteria is the visible Craig I know you I want you to finish your thought all right but I want to say this to you right now yeah um my nickname on the show is the slurp King which means it's the opposite of being woke I don't know anything right so that is why you know you might think to yourself disgust I'm really glad you're interrupting me for that why I'm saying by Metiria is becoming resistant to antibiotics because bacteria evolves very quickly and the big drum is big drug companies are no longer Putin R&D money and antibiotics do you know that do you know how I know yeah because antibiotics cure you but yeah they don't want to cure you they want you to be chronically manageable mm-hmm they don't want to take the disease away they want to give you a drug for the rest of your life that's why Big Pharma always block certain like breakthroughs and medicine but I never make it to the United States because why would they give you something that they cannot supply or sell medicines for anymore I ran into a guy at oaks by your house it's a little place called correct compound and there was a white dude there hippyish kind of guy you know the long hair and he was telling me about how they found a cure for cancer through that some delete like some sort of plant was out and it was a cannabis what my broader question to you is is that do you think that they have like cures from diseases that are in the marketplace that they're just hiding from the public for sure you think so even Cuba has better control of their of lung cancer than they do in the United States you go to Cuba to get treated for lung cancer yeah that's insane to me where do you go with for the border thing you know that thing that we got like - Greg I listen you can't say that word is our word that is not you all right okay if I were woke you would know that it's a good show to make you feel better some girl wrote in and said that she got Pseudomonas from her contact lenses and your they lost her vision when you go blind also on when you see your fountain not working maybe for hire somebody to take a look at it you're not a maintenance your own racist why because I did I say Mexican you thought it you thought it yeah you did you did man I am being Mexican is very high you're right I just know it that when you said I should hire somebody working my garden I see you will you do it because their lives aren't as a police or the Liam Neeson of this Canyon you know Liam Neeson just got busted for being a racist did you hear that what do you do oh you got a google app you got a Google Google machine it was bad yeah he gave an interview and he said apparently that I don't even want to say because I'll get into trouble just saying it I just because you know people confuse me with leave what is there's just a lot of in quotations racist comments but there's a bunch of videos I don't wanna put in videos let's see what they said he's spent maybe a week walking to your paws with a heavy stick and hoping some black bastard would come out of a pub and have a go at me about something you know so that I could dot dot dot kill him I have a very particular set of skills I will find you know he's well he said this on I wasn't when he was drunk or no contacts no no hear what it was was he was given an interview for some movie and he it's a revenge movie it's a Liam Neeson movie really yeah you know some bad yeah you must never done one of those before ever so he said that I think I guess interview said to him have you ever wanted to take revenge on somebody and apparently when he was young a friend of his was raped and he wanted to take revenge and apparently the rapist was a was a black person and so he decided he was you know gonna go and look for a black people responsible for this guy I mean it's bad just the real life then do ya but although yeah they are friends mace window yeah and the green Yoda is Asian oh yeah you liked a lot of people back then yeah yeah yeah but is your Asian I don't know I'm gonna get yeah so I'm here on the snow look me in the eyes and be honest with me yeah he's Yoda Asia I've never seen the movie so I can you know see any star I've never seen any movies I don't watch movies anymore that's garbage except for Bohemian Rhapsody did you see that no I was gonna see it last night I cried like a baby although is it that good yeah it's just fantastic we that guy the guy who plays everybody mercury oh my god oh yeah because I saw a clip when he did the live 8 because I was obsessed with the live 8 thing I've watched it because it's possibly one of the greatest performance live band performances of all time right I was there there's no way you were there [ __ ] there no I admitted who you there no no but I've been there and I could have been there is conceivable yeah yeah you were you were living in Scotland I was 20 22 23 at the time yeah yeah but you weren't it was at in England correct it was in English so that's close yeah it's San Francisco LA yeah Wow really it's that close so he could have gone but you weren't [ __ ] there let's just say I wasn't now you were in a band right yeah but they were in there none of that was there was a lot of different bands why are you trying to embarrass you you think it's good really I think if I didn't have my Lithuania what FY just for you people to the band okay I was in a band called the night creatures I love them yeah all night oblem yeah the I was in a band called the dream boys you are yeah yeah yeah it wasn't like a boy band I won't you understand that I'm a [ __ ] boy what does that mean I don't know what is a [ __ ] what is a [ __ ] boys no [ __ ] boys just a douchebag self-centered they usually take duck lip pictures so bathroom selfies so like all those guys around the Ola right guys who kind of just like casually just plow through women and with no regard feelings or any of that just a shitty douche bag there is are there any of those in LA there's one that reason where we live in our neighborhood like you know there is a lot of like weird dudes there to hang out there all the [ __ ] time right it's didn't you think when you came to LA you like does anybody have a [ __ ] job yeah all day and in coffee shops all day I'm like yeah yeah yeah how could you afford all this coffee yeah you knew I see there sometimes and I get really scared Christopher Nolan I know Chris no you did you know he lives in the neighborhood yeah I know wait so if you saw Chris Nolan I'd say hey Chris yeah and then what would he say hello right would you hug I just need to know what the thing he's pretty she doesn't know right but if you shake hands and try attacked you with a representation but is it one of those things where you go armed cuz I have certain friends there's hello you have a hello huh but then it's like kind of just surface and then you leave or it oh do you guys get into how's the family and all that kind of stuff sometimes maybe yeah actually I ran into his wife Emma the other day and we did all the family's cheese Maura how's the family person he's more a kind of thinking about things we did we did have a conversation because I don't know if this is kind of lame me saying this but I was talking to him up but I don't have a browser on my phone and I don't do any social media and I don't go on in and they at all anymore and I was tech talk to her about that and she said yeah god I want to try and get off that - he said Christopher doesn't even have email he's like totally doesn't touch it not says that just gets in the way so how does he I know you don't probably well don't know this but how does he get information probably from him oh wow so like because he is a director correct I mean he's one of the biggest ones in the world yeah I would say did you know him when he was before momento even no no I didn't know oh yeah I'm in the past few years the last couple of years yeah yeah no so what are you doing now your are you doing eyes because I looked it up are you on the road now I just did a tour I just finished the tour oh I know wait I'm doing a bunch of dates I'm doing La bracing for the first time in my life you can do stand-up in LA yeah welter no the ace is really nice and then you're gonna do how many seats is it do you guys know it's pretty big but your podcast there what ace I think we know but the morrow no we've never done that that's a different one I usually that's about two two and a half to three to three thousand two to three thousand yeah yeah yeah I've never played a later so I don't know if I Wow but well how come cuz you don't like going to the comedy store these clubs no no but let me see something um I think you would be welcomed with open arms I you know what I think you may be right and I think I would do it now but I just I'm not in LA much anymore yeah and and I think I I would be fine with it I used to be when I felt competitive with our comics I I wouldn't go I don't I don't feel competitive anymore we just wouldn't let me ask you that that's a very good question that you brought up yeah when does that does that leave through age or does that leave oh it's a true success I think maybe a little of both yeah I think it's mostly age you because you still see Kevin Nealon he's in your he's in your age demographic I think it's a little five yeah he's like Bob Saget yeah I'm in Pope's yeah but Bob sometimes it's a club like it's a very needy man that's what that's what he needs validation right 65 right I'm 56 that's I'm sorry that's nine years difference I that's all right oh you take that's not much what are you you owe you an hour okay I'm 47 oh yeah right now Wow Gary you sir you know how dare you but my point is this is that I guess you and I would be it in the same demographic or no no I don't think so I'm like a generation I had a generation that's right yeah I'm sorry I was doing stand-up when it was still cool no I don't know I guess maybe every 10 years or so it gets a little different because I think it would be cool if I called Adam like the comedy star and I said hey Ferguson wants to do some sports this week I think he'd say Ferguson whoo no he wouldn't like when does he wanna and I'd go he wants to go up Thursday and Sunday or whatever and I think that would just FYI I just want you to I was gonna go with my lithium mania tell you why though it would be cool too because you know I think all the comments would love to see you really yeah you know right now well I feel like you're setting me up for a hit like you know it's the Mafia and you're like yeah you're gonna be a made guy we're gonna come in this room over here everything's gonna be great correct and then he'd be happy yeah but you know Chapelle would be like oh yeah and then even to ten minutes and what dick I am or something or LCB just no no yeah do you like Dave Chappelle's work I do I have to say I think he is as good as anybody I have ever seen yeah not only that I think that he's people say that he is aren't prior that he's our Richard Pryor of our generation and I would I would even say no to that because I don't think that Pryor had that kind of work ethic that I think you I think you're right I think that that's like comparing you know Hendrix to you know like a modern you know guitar was it doesn't make people like to do that like they go armed oh the Red Hot Chili Peppers are the Rolling Stones are of our generation and in my head I'm like that doesn't make any [ __ ] sense it's good well I don't understand why people have to make things like other things like he's the number one actor in the world he like but what does that [ __ ] mean like he acted harder than any of four hands Oh four hands guys hey you guys back in the day if we had hymns as a sect that I could go to yeah I would have a lot of things relieved you know like my pee no problems I mean I'll probably eat cheese get to eat cheese I could have gone to him to go what sort of the Ichi's I have hair loss what do I do I look I'll keep looking like a pat morita I don't look like him anymore right I figure out they have real medical advice there on that look babe I put all day all over my body on my feet on my knees yeah but for hams can fix them yeah hymns no probably not but you know it's a male problem to put everything here I order now our listeners get a trial month of hymns just for five dollars today while supplies last see website for full details this would cost hundreds if you went to a doctor or a pharmacy go to four hams a comm slash belly you gotta try it out I'm being honest guys this is a real thing we've tried it ourselves mm-hmm right so go to what hymns calm for him yeah for hymns calm and and check it out yeah real that's fo r hims calm slash belly for hymns calm slash belly now back to this funny show you know you know what it seems to be like have you ever have you ever been in any way remotely connected to the Golden Globes no I just whenever you do a movie and you have to go and see the Hollywood Foreign Press the first time I have that and I meant the hundred or so people in the Hollywood Foreign Press I went I get it this whole [ __ ] thing is a scam the whole [ __ ] the Oscars the Golden Globes is all [ __ ] it's all [ __ ] the gold glows Hollywood for press I wouldn't trust these guys to walk my dog Wow yeah unbelievable right and all they wanted to do is run up and get selfies with you it's crazy yeah it's like honestly speaking to the Hollywood Foreign Press is like and I mean no disrespect to people in mental hospitals it's like it's like people who are like crazy yeah it's like when Johnny Depp that movie that he did that was terrible there was a Johnny Depp movie that was nominated at the Golden Globes there's no he's an absolutely terrible Mordechai no it's not even work I love above Chocolat I love Shakalaka yeah you know what I think you must have had your lithium Annie but he did it and Ricky Gervais was hosting right and he goes you know the only reason why you know Johnny Depp is here is because the Foreign Press wants to take photos with them yeah well and that's when I in my head I'm like cuz I saw that movie yeah that's tourists Angele that's what it was yeah that was nominated and then they wanted Angelina and Johnny Depp at the Golden Globes just to take like photos and you say that Jelena like you like your friends your friends no it's like saying um I see Jesus in that same way she she used to live when they were together they lived right next to my compound their compound was next to my compound next to Christopher Nolan's we will wait brad pitt and Jolie lived next year of compound they live right in our area Tailwaggers the divorce was going on you didn't see all the helicopters over the neighborhood that's what it was being robbed or something it might be not yeah yeah yeah yeah you know Wow no because we're listen we're a little closer to Frankland oh stop trying to be crap yeah yeah I'm gonna go marry with the people we don't live one building ones that we got we're with the people you're with the PPI yeah yeah a street credibility that's right and you guys are up there with the booze look I clean my fountains just like a regular guy I know I loved your place you know why I love your place because you can't see any you can't see your house yeah from the street I'm gonna tell people where it is obviously no they can't see yeah yeah and there's a gate and there's that tall what's that guy's name I love that guy Tomas Tomas awesome there's a foreigner there a foreigner by the to much he is a funky East European yeah yeah and welcome the gate opens you walk into this compound it's [ __ ] great man I want it Tomas well yeah you're the ladies do like Tomas we have this guy John now with the Hitler haircut John nice clothes he's like the Tomas from another country yeah yeah this is the most Asian guy I've ever seen in my life look at his face it's like it's like that you could buy like statues of them at like you know the airport in Beijing the face of Beijing yeah yeah yeah okay you have a real [ __ ] face right Hey no yes because I'm Asian no no you know flat right and your dick is not good Gregg that's what this kind of show that's what the shows about well no I look then I'm so high I'm like I'm not comfortable with the way you're talking and what's the deal with bananas Arthur they're yellow they're weird they taste yeah yeah that'll be a billion dollars please do you feel weird with like African Americans like they you because they call each other the n-word and all that kind of stuff that doesn't does that bother you or no it's none of my business exactly so I can call him ching chong I'm sorry that's none of its like I want to have a language and a way to talk to other Asians yeah that white people can't say yeah what about Mandarin that there are so many languages that perhaps you could use with fellow Asians no but right Gilver does that be cool to have late in English so that people can understand what you're doing yeah and then have them feel like uncomfortable but all that's the way they have their own way of talking wait wait are you doing a white person voice there's that that voice that noise I was you know it's it's absolutely true but while I'm around like if it was just me and him I do like oh isn't it such a relevance oh look at your cracker doesn't that feel good calling him cracker no I felt bad like yeah yeah I don't like it so then you were you were also on The Drew Carey Show for seven years yeah not nine years nine years yeah when you were on that show did you think that this is it this is what I'm gonna be doing and then that's it or it didn't feel that good when I was saying this is it walk on set one so we can go carry on fire you know drew and I worked out that if if read about season seven there if it was pair word I was the highest-paid actor in Hollywood because all I said was getting a vibe that's the only thing you said there's other dialogue you know we were looking at it one week because when you get into these show you still doing that set comtesse nothing right so when you when you get to like year seven or urate you're pulling down some money yeah and I one episode I had all I said was Gary you're fired I fight it wasn't even that it was an episode where drew goes to China and somebody tells me and I say China and walk out that's it that's all I said I said the word China and I got paid next worth one and it's a lot of money yeah it's weird because they call me a lot and they go hey we couldn't fit you into the script because I'm like fifth leader right but they pay you yeah they go but so have fun yeah it's literally like oh I just got a free check for no reason that was exactly like me that was weird yeah it doesn't it's good cuz like who doesn't love the money but it's bad because you feel kind of weird right right yeah it feels like oh they don't they don't want me they don't want me or they don't need me and also because I'm you know an alcoholic right recovering alcoholic I have still have that ISM and that like I just had this narcissistic kind of self-serving kind of mental think that do you think that I mean I'm also a recovering alcoholic you say but I have to say but I think that we're not the only people who suffer from narcissistic self-serving impulses right I think that you will find a lot of guys around the Oaks gourmets but you find it like because I am you know a recovering alcoholic I do clubs every night Ryan and there I am it is a difficult thing to navigate in terms of just in terms of seeing all the drinking and the partying and everything that goes on and then me still trying to be a part of you know I want to be a comedian and still want to be able to you know bond and connect in that way I find it to be difficult at times you know especially when because I don't know if you know this but in this last year I've been really dry like I have been doped two meetings this year right that's and so I'm in my ear response it's so we're responsible yeah and I am I have to admit I'm very moody yeah I'm I'm going to write drunk right now I'm very um and I just find myself at the clubs even there are things in my head like oh what if I did you know what would happen you know like I think it through even more than normal yeah yeah and it always ends up when I think things through like if I smoke pot with Chapelle right now right and then next day what would happen I probably I think to myself I relapse I can do whatever I want now and then you just the support just keeps going and going and so it is yeah it is really responsible of me I think the paradigm is mistaken if I can just correct you please this is what I wanted the there is a prevailing thought not just amongst people who are addicted to substances who have gone clean and sober but I just think generally in society that when you stop taking the substance for which you're addicted you are somehow denying yourself something and the opposite for me when I'm healthy in my head and it's not always like this but but most of the time it has these days I'm not denying myself anything I am stopping doing something which actually I love but I had difficulty not doing so the idea of saying I want to have something that I cannot have or know that I've relapsed I can do anything I want I actually think the opposite is true that I feel like for me my alcoholism takes this this manifestation which is it is an allergy which manifests itself as a compulsion so if I take the substance the alcohol the allergic reaction to that is a mental aberration which which thrusts me into compulsive behavior to drink more alcohol and so the cycle of addiction continues oh you do when when you get clean and sober is remove the allergic substance which triggers the the allergy it doesn't take care of you in any other way other than breaking the cycle of that but but any neurosis or any discomfort that you that one pairs not you Bobby but but you but me Craig or anyone who has these tendencies or personality types what it does is is the you know it's all still there everything that you need to deal with is still there just like people I know I know I know I mean it it's so funny because you know I've been around you know recovery since I was a kid right since I was in high school and I know these things right I've read the book I'd you know I've read things you know and I know these things but I'm just in I don't know it's so weird I am in a specific weird state or I just can't I don't know what it is doing it not really know I'm very moody and ask and she has to take the brunt of it and it's really not fair to her because we live together here right and she sees me snap or like you know and or me being in these like crazy like moods and I am a well aware of what it is right I understand what the root of it because I'm just in myself and in my thoughts right and she says it's it's it's a nightmare I wouldn't ask you this because you know someone has labile as him he's so up and down up and down and if you it seems like he had really I said this before we were on there I really do think you could have done better but choices and that's always a great guy but Bobby I think you would agree with me so in his mindset is if I leave one thing I have to replace it with another yes and how do you break that idea that you don't have to replace it with another form of addiction or another compulsion well I think it you know it goes back to what I said earlier that you're not denying yourself anything yeah you're you know so so it doesn't there is no there is no scale or reparation like you know if I don't have alcohol then what do I have well what you have is release from the thing that's make that's killing you and making you miserable and psychotic so alcoholics are lonely people I know that look for a reward for getting a gift in the [ __ ] first place which is you get the gift of desperation that gift of desperation if you read it correctly will give you the gift of sobriety and now you want something for that you lucky son of a [ __ ] you got sober in the first place so many people don't yeah they don't they cannot connect to the idea that room just it's not even the idea it's just lucky enough for some for I'm so [ __ ] grateful that I got some moment of clarity that broke the cycle oh god it's Craig aware of your debilitating video game addiction and other things like porn addiction and all of that I would imagine no I should really talk yeah no I would I have I feel that about everything like when I stopped drinking alcohol it's just don't being an alcoholic I just actually I got more alcoholic in an odd way but so I've had addiction I have an addiction to porn because I'm a Scottish Protestant and I've had the video game things and then [ __ ] candy crush or but here's the thing about about video games that in my experience not necessarily everybody else's I've never played so many video games that have blacked out and hair carp I've never played so many video games that I've broken the hearts of people who have were miss fortunate enough to love me you know I've annoyed myself and other people but the scale of that what the damage of these things said that for me now I'm not saying that that's not possible but for me that has not happened yeah and I seem to be able to put things down easier with the exception of about a year ago I stopped going on social media about three or four months ago I stopped going on the internet at all and I experienced it was drawl from that and a way that I haven't since nicotine really which is a lot twenty years ago and that I think a lot of people have and are unaware of what are you well how did you feel like what was the feeling will discontent insomnia wild mood swings depression all of the friends that turn out yeah when when you try to break an addictive cycle it's very yeah this is why you're here yes this is no I honestly I honestly I listen this is something that I needed to hear usually in this podcast I yell at people and I tell people that I'm the king and I and I'm like King Joffrey in there I'm just like you know I mean you're yeah and you're that and all that stuff and it's thing is that I am this is exactly what I needed to hear because I am I can see myself spiral even with you with this gift of having to show that I'm on when I'm there and it's everything that I've ever wanted right it's everything right it's like remember when she met me my career was nothing I really had I was like going on the road these shitty comedy clubs but not great thank you I mean great comedy club and thank you so much for the [ __ ] opportunity and for me to make money and I had really appreciate it and you guys are all a list and great hey and I'm very grateful for we were a happy shitty last time he plays yeah right but um but even so I would pray where I would like envision please let me get back into you know the graces of Hollywood and get a job right and now that I'm on this job I sit there and I'm just I'm sitting in this room my dressing room and I just sit there and as and I'm just in this misery you know and and and I am I'm well aware of it too I'm like huh this is everything you ever wanted right you prayed about it and now that you're here you're in your miserable what is that and I know exactly what I need to do but just right now I haven't been able to put one foot in front of the other and go there I'm getting to the point of the cliff where I have to do it or I'm gonna [ __ ] relapse or something even worse perhaps my whenever I have found myself in that position even I have and I hope to never do it again but I think probably it will happen again but whenever I've been successful in breaking that cycle of anguish that you're describing it has that I have to do things even although I don't want to do them so I have to you know in Christian theology they say faith without works is dead which i think is actually quite an interesting way of describing it you believe what you want but if you're a douchebag you're a [ __ ] douchebag you know so what you believe and what you do have to be commiserate they have to they have to attach to each other so if you say to you if you say I I am uncomfortable I am unhappy I have to do all this thing but just saying that doesn't mean [ __ ] unless you do something right so even although it's a little bit I mean I I don't like to break the traditions of you know the fellowship to which I belong yeah but I will say this that anytime that somebody walks into a room like some day like you walks into a room of these meetings and says I've had a hard time and I'm back there are so I mean there's douchebags there let's not be mistaken but that's not the majority the overwhelming thrust of the meeting will be we're glad you're back it's good you're here here's what I did when I felt like you yeah and and then just do it you know and I think that for people who are there's no embarrassment in struggle I think this is there's an odd there's an odd thing in society know that that somehow struggle or mental anguish or lack of success or is some kind of failure and I believe it on that Instagram evenings you should like like like everything has to be successful all the time you [ __ ] nuts that's crazy how can everything be grey all the time that's that's insane yeah that doesn't that doesn't make any sense Wow and and but people are like oh look at my fabulous luxury yeah yeah if you say like people who are who are been sober a long time they say I'm great I feel great I've never felt you know the need to have a drink I'm like then I don't very much you and I suffer from the same thing all right Wow yes you're right and you know what dude it's like this man yes underslept King in you stop looking at me that way oh because he's never seen me vulnerable before this morning you're erasing look at me right now hey you know I want to admit something to the room John you know even though you're never here right he's a father congratulations yeah yeah are you high right now John seriously how you hire right out a little bit right yeah you look great hey you know what dude it doesn't interview with your life keep doing your yeah yeah happy but if you're happy you're happy but look he's blitz out of his [ __ ] mind yeah yeah he thinks we're at [ __ ] fight or the kid or right hey guys we have taken a really quick break for one of our amazing sponsors you guys the belly and the belly sometimes they come home and I hung go kalila My Beautiful equal partner I mean can you make I can make it too but can you make what do we have and she says equal partner let's get blue apron we have blue a Bronco what do what kind of flavors because I know it's gonna be exotic yeah and I know it's gonna be fresh and healthy tasty and whatever she makes from blue apron I'd love it you know they have all of it okay yep dishes from from Mother Earth oh that's what I should say on the ground yeah guys check out this week's menu and gets $60 off at blue apron dot-com slash belly that's blue apron dot-com slash belly blue apron a better way to cook yeah they also have Mexican dishes but mostly I don't eat those ones but the Mexicans the beans what are you talking about anyway the blue apron though I honestly the honestly though yeah my honest thing is is that blue apron is literally my favorite meal in the whole world I'd rather eat blue apron than eat at an arrest fancy restaurant event and you know what's exactly what's going into your food yeah because oil from the ingredients everything yeah yeah yeah guys enjoy the rest of the show um what you know what it's so funny because what it's not funny but when you when I found when I knew that you were coming here I was a little nervous because it just didn't know how this was gonna go and I really it was needed for me this is a wake-up call because I feel and I apologize to kalila because I've just been in a real I've never been this away before I'm in the press if that was me about 18 months ago really yeah yeah and all these things that you're saying to me is ringing complete true to me and I know what I need to be doing yeah and if you don't do it doesn't mean anything it's like you gotta [ __ ] said that walks without walks what the works you try to make everything agent needs to be what was it saying again let me say faith without works is dead right is what I wanted to say right right other point to carry home with you is that you know you don't have people expect a gift when sobriety is the gift right you the conversation we had yesterday was I need you know a bad food nicotine indulgences life's that all of this because I'm sober now you stop talking like that no boy in my house like that yeah what I was doing pulling buddy you look so guilty you looked at me like really Gillian I'm like I know I've said it to buy what I know I know I tried to pull something yesterday we're sure because of the fact that I'll just tell you I quit smoking two years ago a year and a half ago right but I've been vaping okay okay and eating very intelligently okay fried foods and I have high blood pressure I have I've strokes in my family you know so I can't move my neck it hurts so bad because of my high blood pressure every time my neck hurts like we get she has what do they call it stroke stroke out yes change your lifestyle move burn a calorie it's like he's attached to his video game for 16 hours a day so I play 16 hours video games right yeah and I'd like a crazy person right and I'm trying to not to vape because of the fact that my neck is hurting yeah and I'm in a situation where I need to get out of this rut also on top of it I have great things happening because of this podcast I have great things happening in my career right and you know I'm just getting work you know and everything and and yet I'm miserable so you know and I and III made me turn away okay you can't be vulnerable he's king white and I cannot break look I like I'm a Scottish Protestants he's white to me he's country white man that is a white guy Biondi that's why yeah when I'm being vulnerable I can't have pure white get it man look away [ __ ] alright and I have to treat them that way because of the fact that ions of history that's right what you folks have done alright well to be fair right to be fair yeah but the thing is is that yeah you you are absolutely right I know what to do faith work pay for that work he said he's an easier one nothing changes if nothing changes you ain't change then nothing's gonna change you want to feel better do something different stop that's it I am there well good congratulations you bought him though stop it before you have a stroke I'll tell you a friend of mine a guy I know it's not a friend of mine but a guy in orem Lee talented man had a stroke when he was drinking and he's still alive and he's still around and he can say and that's it you want to be that guy oh really yeah he was successful sure that's what I always tell him and he thinks a stroke is gonna kill him I'm like no I'm gonna kill you you me you you were debilitated for the next 30 years of your life and I know this because my dad had one right and he's still alive and he can't move I don't get it my all my grandparents were paralyzed from the neck down because of a stroke my grandmother was for 30 years couldn't leave her house because she was always paralyzed she couldn't feel anything you get you you're in possession of some information and it seems I know that's why I'm saying it out loud because I I'm sorry for yelling but yeah yeah okay all right but I'd I'm in no way intimidate so it's very just let me just it might be me okay sorry and so yeah I this reason why I'm saying it out loud it was to pick up because I know what is going on and it's not I'm not blind to it even when I lash out on kalila right in my head I go you just lashed out why why did you do that she's just being nice she even before you got here she says walk a dog and I just lashed out you know and I feel your pain though I honestly I don't want you thank you that I'm known thank you like I just just don't though what yeah just don't I'm not you think like I have kids right yeah I think I don't want to lash out sometimes and I'd like see for the first 10 years of a kid's life all you do is put their [ __ ] shoes on oh my god wearing a [ __ ] Jersey yeah yeah you think I don't want to yell and scream about their shoes and sometimes I admit I've been a little touchy about shoes but a lot of times I have not done that and just don't do it just don't do it you can feel it it doesn't mean you're not gonna feel it feel it but you don't have to do it yeah yeah yeah it's like sometimes I want a drink but I but you but I want to say this though is but you're approaching it especially in recent times and he has a real recovered man in sobriety and you're you go to meetings and you're and you're you're very healthy right and I'm not like that so right so right now I want to get to the point where you're at and that's um I think my new well there's awakening what I want to do useful I think then the pieces of information that will help you with that you can do it right now this is the this is the instant gratification the addictive people like us this is the great news for us you don't have to wait six weeks for it to take you can be better right now right [ __ ] now just say I'm gonna be bare enough I'm gonna be better now and just be better right now I'm gonna say it now that's it now say later like your feet oh [ __ ] right now I'm gonna be better right for the rest of this day I am NOT gonna lash out at the beautiful woman who is deluded enough to love me that's here's a I'm sorry for standing no that's okay it's good you're right you're absolutely right because the thing is that many years ago it's cold man you know when I was in high school and when I was so I got sober when I was in high school I was junior right and for six years of my first year years of sobriety back then right I couldn't get any women they wouldn't look at me even in meetings and they'd they would no one would look at me I was like at this little shy kid I wasn't doing comedy at the time you know it was a working guy right and I used to go I used to dream in bed like I just want any woman to like me right and now cut to many years later mm-hmm I have a beautiful beautiful luncheon way above you you way above my right right yeah right good for you and yet you know I you know I lash out on her and I do things and it's just like it's really it's just crazy John you know isn't that crazy Joe yeah where are you right now you know you know you're in the closet you're not really you're not far gone you you're still cognitive you're with us yeah yeah you drive that way yeah okay it's fine just as long as you know how the [ __ ] mechanics of the car works you're right how's your kid good all right good thank you um yeah so you're right like I used to pray about someone someone like that and she's a great this one this woman here she just she really just absorbs a lot of [ __ ] from me mmm and she deserves way better well let me just remind you everybody has their limits Bobby and you might have to stop doing that now it's an observation everybody has their limits I remember I when I was drinking I was in love with a woman and I couldn't stop drink and when we lived together in the end she said to me is the most I mean I really understood it was hard she said I love you but I can't hang around and what she'd do this and be this I can't I can't be part of this yeah and she left me and I understood I was devastated and heartbroken but I totally understood why she had to go because you know in that kind of Darkness you just pill everybody down with you hmm and swim come on I'm gonna swim do you still do your thing a lot on Sundays at what earlier oh well you know I haven't been in LA for a long time even on tour well and then I've been Scotland for a long time too yeah I've been in Glasgow doing stuff there how big is Sir William Wallace there he's a fairly big way yeah I've always wanted I love that movie yeah Braveheart yeah yeah he wasn't Australian you do know that like William Wallace wasn't this doing didn't wear plaid either oh he's not Australian he wasn't Australian oh [ __ ] why might I go yeah yeah take our freedom yeah nobody let me ask you separate I just have dumped out and even save it but um when um that move shame how was the big sensation in Scotland you kidding me scoob's like crazy it was crazy right yeah yeah yeah I auditioned for that moving didn't get it no you really yeah we mean another guy you're so close yeah it was really close I had like half a dozen meetings with Mel Gibson about it it was like right down to the wire oh wow the guy who got it I can't remember his name good actor Irish guy you know you know in the movie the guy who talks to God yeah yeah yeah it was that oh wow yeah oh that would have it but you know what you did fine yeah I did okay yeah yeah but I really wanted that part and yeah was just newly sober as well oh wow and at that point I thought that if you pray cuz you know they say like pray and stuff yeah I could pray and get stuff yeah nothing with people who pray anything dear God can I have a job dear God can I have a parking space dear God can I have like shoes yeah yeah yeah I realize no he doesn't do that no do you pray I mean I really I do preoccupy I do too but I'm not religious in any way but neither but I do pray Hughes here's what I say there's that the only prayer I can make work for myself is a line from one prayer one line from one prayer and here's what it is you know you're familiar with this st. Francis of Assisi oh yeah I love that part right that whole prayer I can't memorize that whole prayer yeah but you start to start it let me see if I can do some of it the only lying yeah but I this is my entire prayer routine here is Lord make me a channel of that peace that's it can you look up the st. Francis prayer I would like to say it on on air okay I want to say it on air because I think that'd be a good you know ending to this thing don't know no idiot now but like oh you're gonna say at the end yeah well see that I want him to look it up I have it do you want me to correct or justly just do it will you give me the beginning see if I can do some of it Lord make me an instrument or piece is that it is well I I say just different there's different versions all right Lord make me an instrument of my pillars of peace why you right she's sweating so give me the next line where there is hatred I may bring wrong nope so love what let me sow love let me sow love give me the next line where there is injury I may bring solitude no pardon oh [ __ ] all right where there is doubt I may bring light not one word faith faith give me the next one where there is despair one worry bring truth just hope where there is darkness I may bring light where there is sadness there is joy don't do that part though don't do the Jesus to help me okay all right no please don't do that the last part is okay this is different yeah oh divine master grant yes I may do it not so much seek to be consoled but to do it as to consent to consult somebody to be understood and do rather be understand as yeah as to understand as to understand to be loved than to be loved as to love as to love for it is in giving it is what one finds is to give forgiveness that we receive receipt love let me do another one for you dear Santa [Applause] but I was close you're pretty close thank you thank you so much and that's why Pete Gilbert and that's why you're a part of this family thank you so much because you're a yes meant for life right and you and you always have my back and I really appreciate it right but we all know in this room and everyone listening now that didn't have it yeah I was pretty far off but I've heard that before yeah but it's too much it's a good prayer if you're a saint yeah but I'm not yeah but the first line I think is this is that's the mantra that I try and use all the time Lord let me just I don't know what God is that I I'm pretty sure it's not an angry white man living on a cloud I'm pretty sure it's not that hmm I'm pretty sure it's not some awful civil servant making a you know a checklist of good deeds and bad deeds like some kind of pernickety santa mm-hmm but I think there is a force that guides thought yeah and I think there is benevolent force that is available if you can clear oh God yes yes I'm sweating on my face but yes where do you normally sweat oh you sweat on my nose right here and whenever there's sweat on my nose is what I'm like really like feeling something you know do you ever notice that when I like if I'm in a horror movie and you look at my nose it's just a balls ball of sweat when you see in or like if you're acting in the norm no I mean no I'm like what are you doing a hormone sweat no that's where sweat knows then laughs no I swear on my nose what I'm feeling something you know so yeah so let me could i I want to ask you a couple more questions just just okay since you're here yeah so the touching thing you know but we yeah you touch my hand like it was kind of like it's insincere thank you more sincere body properly are done no I just felt that we are connected in some ways I this is where I go thank you for being here it was a swipe it was Maura it was because no I wouldn't be a little more forceful with it is what I'm saying it again oh no no just put your hand there right this is what I was thinking and just it's just that in my head it was like gave me so much wisdom right now and I wear coat you should touch them in my head so when I was halfway there I'm like oh this is not you shouldn't be doing this right so then it just came out like that oh yeah let me just do it for real then oh yeah does that feel better no I just don't touch it [Music] I'm sorry for touching you know you don't have a Howie Mandel thing with like no no no no you know him yeah I do yeah I know I love him I love her he's so good I always pretend I've got the flu just yeah I keep this sketch at my house once and I had to cover all my furniture with plastic but he's tortured man yeah I know I was from MADtv and they go on humming Mendell wants to do a sketch with just you and I go okay cool we wrote something up and then um it was in my house and they got you got a cover your place with plastic so we covered the whole place with plastic and then he walked inside I've never hugged him I don't think I've ever shaken shaking his hand no fist bump yeah not even a pound I usually do the little less I want to cut the tie thing Oh with him yeah oh that's great easy Buddhists is that no but I feel like the lack of any physical wind is a gift that I can give right right there has to be something right so he chose to do the bow tie right yeah yeah what I always go like this high E oh yeah that's good yeah yeah I'm excited he's I covered my mouth that's what I do yeah yeah but so um when cuz when your show your talk show was over yeah was that a time where you were were you depress then or now no actually not then I was very elated by being uh and I was fine for a couple of years I this was about eighteen months ago I I kind of liked my attendance to my mental well-being that what you're describing I'm just just W I knew I had to do I just wouldn't do it yeah I was some kind of bloody mindedness within me bless you it's the thing ya always say is it that war will have the things I've brought the potent disease and sorry so so it was that it was just a lack of attentiveness to to the type of person that I am and the maintenance that I need to wow conducting myself it was bad yeah it was really bad I thought it's gonna get drunk yeah and then what happened the the during all that time period I had to get a piece of pretty major dental surgery yeah but it was a root canal and and I had to when I got it it was a painful thing yeah and after it the doctor said I'm gonna give you some painkillers and I was like I can't do em I lost my right to use those things and he said well this is gonna hurt a lot I said well I'm not doing them and he said but look let me just give you the prescription just in case you change your mind yeah when this wears off and I changed my mind because it was unbelievable so I call up my for one of a bit my sponsor yeah and I'm talking to him and there's like you know helicopters from dr. Phil above my house and all that kind of stuff and I take this pink colour right and with dr. Phil lives in the neighborhood to know and I I wouldn't actually I wouldn't listen to him anyway yeah he's not really a doctor you know yeah yeah and then what he he did just I know you're in the middle of a thing but I just have to say something about him yeah he did an interview with Shelley Duvall when she was like mentally like not mm-hmm and it really just turned me off to that [ __ ] bastard I'm not a fan yeah I'm turned off to that bastard you know it's funny I had him as a guest on the late-night show early on and he was talking to me and about halfway through then every I thought you have no [ __ ] idea what I'm talking about as I was talking to him about addiction and I thought you were thinking yeah yeah yeah no I doesn't mean he doesn't know about others he's a fraud well as far when it comes to understanding what an addictive personality yes yeah yes yeah more than that he's just really exploitative exploitive yeah maybe anyway it was a total me so I didn't kill her yeah and I only took it I took it twice I was like prescribed twice a day or something I wouldn't do that I took it twice and it worked that I was very grateful for I didn't get high I started I'm very weird thoughts but I wanted I kept focusing on I wanted to go to war ass and get drunk more ass yeah I was totally fixated on Juarez yeah and the thing is I've never been at war is no I just no no listen let me ask you cuz you've probably noticed this one is Bobby ever got an idea in his head you going [ __ ] is he focusing on that but that makes no sense at all oh yeah he has a lot of fixations that's why I just leave it for days right that's what happened with me and so far it was about two weeks all I could think about was gonna Juarez and drinking cold beer Wow there's other places in Mexico that would be better for you but yeah I figured that if I went it were raising like a drunk someone would take me and that oh is that what that's what it was yeah because I had a I went to a brothel in Juarez okay I almost died yeah just FYI yeah I wasn't I wasn't thinking about that before before us no I used to I [ __ ] one girl in a warez I had sex that chased you down yeah yeah yeah yeah anyway it's a dangerous place and don't yeah I think that's what I was looking yeah I know that we were looking I don't try to make myself feel you know more glamorous yeah I would die of you know in a knife fight more as as opposed to like [ __ ] my pants in the doorway yeah who's the biggest guest you've had on your on your show do you think in your head like top three you think I think Archbishop Desmond Tutu is probably Wow he went to your show that's amazing we said to me backstage what like I was I want to see him and he's like who's there I said I'm very honored to meet you faster too anyway oh no I'm very happy to be on the show he said what's the show about tonight about you [Music] and you had him and now you're here yeah no it's like just what the shot is fall yeah yeah no I he was he was great because I felt like that I was talking to someone who really had faced some very terrifying things yeah like the power of an evil state yeah hooked its square in the [ __ ] eye and brought it down how many Monday lever they brought it down and then and then didn't take revenge to guys yeah unbelievable what they do that Truth and Reconciliation is like that's a masterpiece of human evolution the Truth and Reconciliation Commission should be studied by all peoples everywhere to understand how to move forward from political conflict I've always said that have I not always said that I see it every day yeah every day you talk about having a hate box and getting revenge on everybody that's ever done you wrong you bastard I say that as well yeah and here's another thing that I know Lord make me a channel but when you were doing your show I looked at you at your compound and I said would you ever do Tiger belly and you said to me I would do it and that you are a man of your word and now that you're here right I really appreciate it I really do don't we appreciate it guys you guys are talking so at the end or deal with parking you do a thing where we have on it's called unhelpful advice and people email us question then we just try to help them okay or it's either horn or or on on oh yeah on hopeful bars with Craig Ferguson hi Tiger belly fan my name is Erin I'm 23 and I've been with my girlfriend for about three years whenever I go near her phone she freaks out and grabs it with a physical strength i straight-up didn't know she had I feel terrible about it but when I went through 1-9 found out she had been texting her ex for months and it hurts because she has told me before that she doesn't talk to him now she has him under a girl's name and his alerts hidden I feel like she has a different energy in the text than you would have with a regular friend he's always telling her to go over and she seems to consider it he knows she has a boyfriend but when they talk she will stop replying and say she fell asleep but really she was with me I'm starting nursing program soon so my time will be devoted just to school and I'll be going to bed early giving her time to do what I don't even want to be with this guy you know you've got enough information leave wow-whee dingle-dangle in these things but that's the truth another email someone who treats you bad should I confront her [Music] the greatest thing I ever did to break up with somebody was make him believe that he had done nothing wrong cook him a meal did the laundry clean the house and just got the [ __ ] out of there good for you yeah I've never written no no retaliation no confrontation just I got the [ __ ] out yeah you have another email online okay thank you Gilbert for a couple months now I've been dealing with a real toxic friendship I've been friends with this guy for more than two years it's my father and whenever I hang out with him or our two other friends I always end up paying for everything food conscient movie tickets everything I still don't get any respect he makes fun of my mom's business of taking care of old people my literate dad and my dead dog just to name a few things I got a hey Bart mr. scraps no quit hittin yourself there's the answer questions about guys saying I'm afraid to talk to this girl in my class how do I do it that's what we've been getting lately it's a lot right let's put all those ones in an umbrella in a package ready to answer all of them all right you do it young man afraid to talk to young women mm-hmm yeah that's hard it's hard to be a young man to talk to young women it's frightening yeah but I can say this though um I was the that was that guy as well growing up and I never talked to them and I was never with them it did motivate me to do stand up later and left it like I gotta figure something out that you know but um I do regret all those things so it's like if you don't you're gonna regret it I think right or now yeah I think that I think maybe look I I think we can all agree on something right like I'm by a long [ __ ] way the coolest person than this one right right so I'm very cool and and here's what what makes me very cool I'll talk to you no matter who you are the same way if you're Desmond Tutu Kurt Russell or a gardener who's fixing a fountain he will get the same respect for me yeah because your human being you treat human beings with respect and expect to be treated the same way I expect to be treated the same way so if you're a young man and you're nervous about talking to a young woman maybe you could give her the information and say I'm nervous to talk to you I want to talk to you but I'm nervous to talk to you because that's what you would that that's you given first of all you you're being vulnerable but also what you're doing is you're treating someone with respect with information say look I'm nervous to talk to you and it's so endearing and that's you're so right yeah like you know I just tell the truth it's not so much be vulnerable there's no Act for rise just like just be truthful yeah just be truthful yeah you you are right don't there's no magic line there's no magic bother is a magic button but that comes much later yeah we don't touch but yeah yeah but the magic button is for way later on yeah and you have to be asked to touch it man yeah that's a difference the great button though is it not oh my god it sticks out like that it's a beautiful button so uh what is your when is your arms show in LA so we can promote that the 4th of April so hey hey sleepers the 4th of April Craig Ferguson is doing a live comedy show in Los Angeles first time I've ever done is the first time he's ever done la I honestly believe that you should do a couple of spots at a club that just so that you can be in the you know no you're gonna do it now I want you to do it what do ya like it's fine i watch documented in plain sight yet no yeah no but I I'm aware of it why the one I watched was yeah what's that yeah yeah do you know I was a little disappointed in that documentary why well I thought there was a there was a nice shot and Freud looking at like all these douche bags get and what their comeuppance but yeah but the truth is I didn't feel like I learned anything about that guy at all I mean he was just a douche bag I didn't know why he was a douche bag yeah they didn't go into his upbringing what his parents would conduct himself like that with no remorse I know so I mean I like the fact that it was you know that it all kind of went wrong but the truth is if that if that festival had been in Britain all the people that turned out would be like oh great a ten all right we're gonna party with Britney but it was like alright yeah great I was bad to be honest never caught any fish YouTube's yeah we're starting in a Sandals resort yes so what was heartbreaking was when he made that guy go suck that guy's penis for water he didn't he didn't suck the guy's penis yeah but he went but the guy this guy said I was prepared to go and suck dick and I was thinking no look I'm not judging anybody for how they spend their time but yeah this guy that wasn't the first thing that guy had gone oh yeah you're right and that's fine this isn't wrong with that nothing wrong with it yeah but but don't don't make it about you know I had to for the sake of the festival you're the water yeah for the water alright and then I'm thinking wait a minute this bohemian official that is getting brought into this because in his office and I never asked them later so I would have just done it though even if this guy showed up even if I'm not gay yeah not even for no water yeah oh yeah yeah yeah he's going deeper into the closet I think you right now like some random guy you know hey we need the water yeah okay what oh yeah I'm not gonna give you the water yeah but how about if I suck your day drink up I would do it depends if I was in the desert yeah actually maybe if I was just in a club it was late and I felt good what else is there other up documentaries that you like that we can recommend cuz I love documents yes generation wealth have you seen that I just watched that is the same remember that I saw it it's the lady that did those photography yes right yes without those books yes and I saw it and that was really crazy it was fair yes very upsetting but it's very sad I'm very sad yeah that's an interesting comment on materialism and I think that that there's that German financier who's hiding from the is why in Germany and he's very is a complete supervillain and he's smoking a cigar yes yeah but he says a line which I think that's really true he said if you think that money will solve all of your problems then you have never had anybody new I felt bad for not his son but his son's girlfriend yeah she's just like she's like what the hell am i doing man or in this family weird I was in the fire document so funny that we both notice actor although yeah yeah well she was because she was the most human person than that interpret what it was yeah she was looking at everything like she was clearly in pain yeah she was in pain and she's like almost on the fence of why am I in this relationship yeah right because you know does that get passed on through that douche bag kind of mentality yeah have you seen three identical strangers here no that's the next time I've heard that's very weird I don't know what your stance is yeah watch it like it's it's a debate about scientific breakthrough versus nature versus nurture no ethics that's exciting you how do you how do you gather that type of information versus you know the ethics of it all you would really like a cross you it's amazing yeah yeah yeah I know a little bit about the thing and I'm looking forward to reading it yeah it's a seen it you know what I the documentaries I love though I love watching documentaries about bands I hate yes fascinating to me yeah have you seen the one of Pulp pop I like Paul but but I the document for you I hated the band rush yeah I saw that will do and then I watched it I like these awesome I am a dick for hey so do I know yeah I like Neil Peart the drama riot right and how he's very standoffish at shows like I saw that documentary where people come and he's so he's so good he's like kind of like the Rachmaninoff a [ __ ] drumming yeah he's he's just likes his solitude he doesn't like to do the photo shoots and all that kind of stuff yeah but I hated rush to and then I'll I saw that I mean anvil the story of anvil yeah that's another great one right happy and then the one about journey I I mean I can't tell you the depth of my losing for the band Journey yeah and then I and then I watched the documentary and I still don't don't like the music was it the little Filipino because he's our national treasure in the Philippines no no no it's an amazing story is amazing but you know he's a dime-a-dozen back home I mean I'd say yeah he is he's just he's incredible but I just think Filipinos produce incredible singing talents like Sean Connery impersonations and Scott like you could just go on YouTube and say Filipino kids singing in the mall and he just picks up like a karaoke machine yeah and he's belting out these ballads and he's like 60 years old and it's just what you know what I didn't like about that is that remember the first show we did in Brazil who aren't helping us yeah right and then they were like he's dancing moving around too much he hasn't grasped the essential dignity of singing for journey stand still and just sing the great don't stop don't stop believing how many journey frontman has there been there Steve Perry and there's that other Steve I don't know we don't know I just it's deep Harry and the Filipino guy yeah no I think I I think that's I think that was like when the heart George Lazenby be James Bond for one movie see you guys don't even know that right yeah did a failure was it after Sean Connery yeah Sean Connery and then before Roger Moreau there was a guy called George Lazenby he did one he was a male model yeah they thought they were gonna teach Sean Connery a lesson by saying we can just get any pretty boy and make fun he was like right go ahead [ __ ] yeah they put this guy and it was it's worth seeing it's so bad oh really is like yeah yeah I want to watch it I think it's called on Her Majesty's Secret Service I don't even know that but okay you know yeah yeah I grew up in Scotland well let's give Traeger round of applause guys he was [ __ ] amazing just one more thing Craig you have a book coming out on May 7 I do yeah what is that book called it's called riding the elephant want to get in trouble producers riding the elephant yeah what is that about it's a book of stories they all come together it is it's sort of autobiographical Assis and they come together as a as a as a book chapter after chapter that begins with chapter one I don't know what you're doing right now but okay and and what and what it is I'll start reading it anyway yeah watch it this adventure yeah big elephant there's parts in it will you go like there is an elephant in it is the story about there really is yeah I went I went on an elephant I wouldn't do that now I'm a vegan but but back then I and I wrote it on an elephant are you really a vegan yeah I've been vegan for like four years now I'll give you a rotten applause guys see if I liked it you wouldn't do it you were [ __ ] that was amazing yeah we'll be back with some housekeeping hey everyone I'm here with George cloudless peeing the bathroom Bobby's walking Craig Ferguson down nice finally my close-up now I'm know how to edit this camera right here John John now behind the camera no BB today Oh guys wow what a great episode I love that guy is like literally my hero my sister was freaking out because she only watched Craig Ferguson she's like the monologue and he was like yes watching him yes yes riffs um guys this episode was brought to you by our amazing sponsors 23andme Tim's and blue apron see what your genes say at 23andme calm slash tiger belly to get your free trial month for just five dollars go to four hams comm slash belly and don't forget to check out this week's menu and get $60 off a blue apron comm $60 off at blue apron dot-com slash belly and also our iTunes reviews here I gotta just plug everything Craig Ferguson he has a tour coming out and across the nation at least yeah so check his website I'll have the links below for everything on that but it's coming up guys on my way home from Cedars today I was just looking out the window and I saw on one of the marquees I forget what place it was but it says April 4th Alan Parsons so my whole way home I was like don't forget April 4 April 4 April 4 April 4 April 4 I was like don't don't think that don't forget so when he said right now that his show was April 4 I was like oh my god some weird like alignment for like I had to remember that date because of Alan Parsons announced the date of his LHS birthday wait John now is high yeah come out she's just like freaking out for to you John okay good yeah thank you John guys if you want to mail us any packages you can send that to who's gonna get it first 16:26 North Wilcox Avenue number 161 Hollywood California nine zero zero two eight five hundred points for kalila Jorge zero and Big Ups to our real papayas super sleepers and premium episode subscribers to our patreon be part of the patreon family go to patreon.com/scishow a and guess what do they get to hear about right now Gil bill well if you listen to this podcast right now you can jump over to patron complex hacker belly and listen to our special Philippines recording did you just call him Gil bill he calls me Gilligan I was trying for Gilligan no bill bill is your longhouse lick your fat in your belly George you ready on my body shame if someone like if someone says Oh like look at his bill bill that means like look at his own top really is your fat girls yeah muffin top but more than that because it's more in the center muffin tops on the side bill bill is really like your bill bill so your bill glad that everyone's gonna nice keep commenting on all my pages is that with Julia's George wow you know Filipino culture yes almost because you're in the Philippines right now log he does seem more like a Hindi okay you don't need to speak already been to the Philippines yeah we're kalila things right now and we're deciding what am i doing we're in the Philippines right now apologizing that the slow enter that means we haven't uploaded the patron and time so that's what's happening right now foresight George is incredible I mean hindsight what can we follow you if you want to follow your Philippines trip IG stories you can follow me at calamity cake Paul George at I'll give this one to John not what your in stuff everything Bobby Lee at Bobby Lee live or go to his website Bobby Lee live.com for his tour dates are there any tour dates well name a restaurant a restaurant right now where people if they listen to this they'll go to the Philippines Oh Howry cohort in shangri-la I think mother well if you expensive can make it out there we're there in hell so we're not good liars I'm gonna be there girl maybe who knows no person even we were punko punko yes yeah I was growing my guild pills dodge your bird and that why you nicknamed me Gil Ville I feel like I'm traveling backwards and time we lost our nose they're bleeding do you know that does it ever does that ever happen to you guys when like you see something that you like your eyes plays tricks on you and you you think something's there but it's not and it throws you into a full panic attack and then you start to question are you am i alive or dead and or like by living in an alternate this is a specific law exactly melting you guys never do that like you ever wake up and then one thing is off and then it throws you into like oh my god am i alive or dead is this like some type of dream I'm living not alive or dead but sad happened to me that post dream I had about you and your sister and me and a man from that dream I told you about we have to address this dream perhaps we should address the solo episode yeah anyways guys thank you for listening Craig's awesome my favorite late night house ever wish you would have loved your Stephen Colbert but wish he would have been the late-night guy he would have killed amazing and you're gonna have to apologize for that when Stephen Colbert's our guest next week a forgiving Colbert is he's awesome he's also money as well second city got out two seconds sick guys you can follow us on instagram at tiger belly on twitter at that tiger belly and email us any questions at the tiger belly at gmail.com have a good night and doors say goodbye in Tagalog I haven't learned it yet yet bye bye English we've been here for a week George George we've been here a week you don't say bye-bye my Gil bills getting angry [Laughter] [Music] [Music]

Channel: TigerBelly

Views: 788,940

Keywords: tiger belly, tigerbelly, bobby lee, khalyla, gilbert galon, podcast, khalyla kuhn, tgrbly, all things comedy, craig ferguson, late late show, james cordon, stand up, comedy, full, tour, flrt, laughing, robin williams, last show, interview, quick-witted, best, 10 best, how to flirt, compilation, best interview, in the history of television

Id: U8TyXzHmoE0

Length: 94min 15sec (5655 seconds)

Published: Thu Mar 14 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/White_Nothing]

They banked this shit for a while. That Liam Neeson shit was a long time ago.

[u/Tony_Bambony]

Craig hit a fucking point with me. If I don't change nothing will change. I have been stuck in a limbo for quite some time now where I know what I need to do but I find it's better just leaving it till last minute, juuuust getting by and not learning from it. If I want my life to change I need to change. Enforce the change on the daily basis and have it become my norm in time. Found this podcast very insightful and helpful.

[u/[deleted]]

Craig is such a great guy. I loved this episode.

[u/Nokel]

Bobby standing up at 53:25 is so goddamn funny

[u/Borborygme]

Even Craig is on that Liam Neeson shit? Meh...

If we're not even allowed to have been racist, we're just cultivating hypocrisy. Chill out people.

[u/Dummy_Detector]

I miss the goofy video pictures where Bobby was striking a pose wearing something weird ,I think they were better than the group pictures you guys have been doing lately