Building A School For Torture - Two Point Campus

today i've been paid by sega to prove my abilities to create a successful school and crush my opponents in the field of intellectual battles but who are my opponents rt game the drift king of mario kart and an unhinged irishman and a chess a chess grandmaster with unparalleled strategical skills and kevin he um i think he plays video games for a living i must crush them in four challenges but there's a twist we're rotating our schools between the challenges meaning they have to deal with whatever nightmare hellscapes i end up creating luckily i've been exploiting and studying humanity for generations now and if youtubers are good at one thing it's scamming teenagers so by unleashing all of my glorious british powers i will crush my opposition and create the most perfectly balanced of schools so let's get ready for the first challenge now our challenge is presented by the amazing lawrence cheney today and our first challenge is to build a rock and roll campus and to quote the logic behind it here's lawrence chaney explaining why if it's not fun no one's going to come you see those are those are words to live by in life if it's not fun no one's gonna it's okay this is a this is a game for everyone ladies and gentlemen so what's the challenge actually about today so in this challenge you need to create the most rock and roll university that's right ladies and gentlemen we've just got to create the most rock and roll university and that's it and luckily i know just where to start so welcome to two-point campus ladies and gentlemen i got my hands on this game about two days ago and i've already clocked in well over 12 hours which is uh safe to say that i've been having a lot of fun with it mostly just discovering all of the wonderful exploits that i possibly can that are going to allow me to completely and utterly destroy my friends now today's challenges on a sandbox map create the most rock and roll campus now we can pick any of these glorious lovely maps to work on including the wonderful spiffing more however for this challenge of building the most rock and roll campers i think it's only fair that i show off some of my glorious exploits and consequently we need to play on the two point university map for this is the largest of all maps next up i'm sure some of my you know more weaker world friends have gone for the creative mode whereby you get a huge amount of money at the start probably someone like dan select the mode we're gonna go with creative however i enjoy a challenge consequently we're going to be starting with only 150 000 and 30 course points that's right it's going to be an extreme challenge so welcome ladies and gentlemen to our glorious university this is our giant plot of land to build our university on it's huge it's wonderful and we need to use it to conquer the ultimate challenge can we build the most rock and roll campus now in order to build a rock and roll campus we're going to need a few things rocks rolls and money so first we actually need to build ourselves a campus area that's right an area where our students can learn and thrive and prosper and so for that we're going to build a nice large area right over here taking up this entire corner of the map fantastic this is going to be our glorious campus building but very importantly we need to work out what actual course we're going to be offering our students and there's a huge array of courses we can do we could go for a very basic general knowledge course that only lasts a year we could go for a music course i mean it makes sense we're going for a rock and roll kind of class however instead these all are terrible because what really matters about running a university is scamming children and making money does that mean we want to go for the money wangling class and steal from a bunch of pot shows does that mean we want to go for the legendary school of fort which would allow us to charge the highest tuition fees possible no we want the archaeology course ladies and gentlemen the archaeology course is the ultimate way to make money and money is the only thing that matters in this universe consequently we're going to start an archaeology course webm and i'm going to do something very impressive i'm going to lower the tuition fees to zero because remember if it's not fun no one will come and also we don't need to make money off of their tuition fees look we might be in an incredibly hard challenge here but i am a skilled pro video gamer so what do archaeology students need well firstly they're going to need somewhere to sleep dormitories are amazing because it allows your students to rest up and most importantly you get to charge them rent based off of the accommodations rating this is a fantastic way of scamming more money out of your students but what every good dormitory needs is a million windows poking to the outside that way i the glorious head teacher is able to monitor my students for we must make sure that they are in peak performance to make us copious amounts of money so bam i've built a huge and glorious dormitory of a very high rating meaning we're going to be able to charge fantastic quantities of rent each year now we're ready to build the most important room of all the dig site basically the dig site allows your archaeology students to find old things in the ground and claim them as your own regardless of whose original culture had them it's the quintessentially british building and we're going to be building a big one because just by simply reading it you can discover the true power of the archaeology room build a bigger dig site to find more artifacts which means surely the larger our dig site the more we're going to find which is why i'm going to be building the largest dig site in the world that's right our dig site is going to take up the entire map because the more area we have to dig the more money we're able to make so we're bam we're just going to ever so slightly lag out the game and fill up pretty much the entire map with just a small pathway around it and we're bam we have ourselves a glorious dig site this is not just any dig site this is the money maker 9000. this building absolutely destroys the balance in the game because normally a dig site is meant to be a nice small area where you just dig up a handful of artifacts but no by having a dig site be this big we are going to make stupid amounts of money right perfect i think i'm actually ready for the new student year to begin so let's start the year and here come our first few students oh they're looking fantastic our glorious journey into building the greatest rock and roll university is a go now archaeologists are great students to have because not only do they have the giant wonderful dig site that they're going to print money out of they can't just randomly find artifacts around campus and artifacts are absurdly overpowered like i've played so much of this game and tried to find the most efficient ways of making money but no it is artifacts they are absolutely stupid oh and speaking of making stupid money our dormitory here is going to make 50 grand per year simply because uh it's a really great accommodation so they're willing to pay a lot of money so here we go our first day in the dig site begins and the lovely joanna odyssey is going to be teaching our students and once this happens you'll notice the dirt in the ground is going down and down and the lower we go the more we're going to discover but the thing is it doesn't scale based off of the size of the room no it scales based off of the amount of lessons you have meaning by round about march this entire area will be fully excavated this creates a little bit of a problem because as you can see our dig site is giant and filled with many many rocks this is the ultimate rock and roll area look there's a rock there's another one there's probably a bread roll in here somewhere too and would you look at that our first artifact has been discovered it's a pair of old boots now look a pair of old boots isn't that exciting but this bad boy is worth a grand a grand is insane that's a huge amount of money what's that over here oh it's a tin can once again we'll just sell the tin can and we'll sell these old toys they're just some basic level artifacts that don't make us the most money but they're going to do a good job of keeping us afloat until we're actually ready and now we've actually started finding some of the more wealthy lovely items like say a pile of rocks that we can sell or more importantly an entire ancient proto pointed on this is a giant pair of dinosaur bones and well lo and behold we can sell it for 8 100 or we can just pick it up and put it somewhere in our university that's right we can just place it literally down right here and it's going to increase the quality of our building but yes the digging is going very well especially now that we found the ancient gem right here we go there's a whole bunch of them around here but these ancient gems each of them are worth 40 000 and every single tick that goes past bear in mind there's 24 ticks in a year this goes up by 500 worth of value so we're going to pick up these ancient gems and we're going to be putting them around our campus because they're going to be making us a lot of money these ancient gems they are really where the money's at this ancient plunder as well look at this 45 grand and now if we were to actually sell the room bearing in mind this room is just kind of basic and we haven't even finished it we can sell this room with all of the artifacts inside of it for 636 000 which is uh more than most universities make in a single year in this game but naturally we're not going to do that no no no no no no i've got better plans ladies and gentlemen we're going to wait until this dig site is finished in just a month or two's time okay very soon we're going to be able to sell the entirety of the archaeology room i mean we could do it right now we could basically sell it and then just immediately place it back down which is probably the most efficient way to do it okay yes we're going to create the money maker 9000 template then we're going to just sell this room for 2.6 million uh which is a lot of money there we go 2.69 million and then we can just immediately place it back down again well bam it's the moneymaker he's back and he's ready to roll so you can dig some more well it's the end of the first year so it's time for us to collect our glorious awards and what did we get oh we got the student choice the most popular campus according to the students themselves meaning they had the most fun and it was campus of the year for just having the most prestigious campus oh my goodness we've done such a great job apparently uh we're not earning enough money to cover our costs based on our current projections we're forecast to lose 94 000 this year oh no that means we've only got another few hundred years of operational money left oh dear okay well if our goal is to make the most rock and roll campers then ladies and gentlemen we need to get rid of the dig site because let's be real the dig site it's not doing us any favors it's not rock it's not roll it's just plain wrong consequently uh it's time that we deal with all of our students now all of our students are doing great they're doing fantastic and we could have them continue a year however i don't want another year of archaeology students no no no i want to farm the most profitable student of all time consequently we're going to lower the student intake for next year to zero we're then going to add a new general knowledge course lower the tuition fees to zero and give it a little boost to its applicants next up we're then going to fire all of the archaeology students that's right all of them need to go they're all getting expelled all right so there we go all of the students have just been expelled i mean they're quite sad uh like they're not happy to be leaving the campus but you know like they've got to go they're just not rocket and roll enough and i need to exploit more people so uh who cares that a whole bunch of crying and upset individuals are leaving the campus as opposed to all of the students leaving i can also just sell this dig site for a huge amount of money which we will do and what bam lovely look at that the dig site is gone and so are all of the students lovely every single student is now left we have no more students so we don't need to worry about the archaeology course anymore we're bam perfect it is just general knowledge that is all that we care about general knowledge students are incredibly easy to satisfy they just need a lecture theater and a library that is all the students need all right and next up in our glorious plan to build the most rock and roll area we need to build a place for the students to hang out a student union but not just any student union the largest student union the world has ever seen and of course it wouldn't be a rock and roll campus without the most important thing in the world a giant stage for live musical performance complete with dance floor so let us start our next year and here come our new students arriving at the greatest location the world has ever seen my glorious campus now the reason why general studies students are so incredibly profitable is because you as a lovely person who generates money gain money based off of the experience that your students get basically when they level up you get cash now here's the problem it's a lot easier to get from level one to two than it is from ten to say eleven but seeing as say a normal student is here for three years that's a problem because generally your third year students are already very high level and so aren't making you much money however for a general knowledge student they are only with you for one single year you know what i've just been thinking we've scammed a massive amount of students but it has also reminded me that when i went to university i also scammed my university bunch there's so many things you could do to get around university rules and regulations and also just using a whole bunch of the advantages of being a student for example in the uk you get a massive amount of bonuses for being a student a lot of places will give you just flat 20 to maybe 50 discounts on things like food clothes you name it but the downside is you have to go to a university for that and a university costs a lot of money per year especially in our country but there's a workaround certain colleges or universities run courses that don't cost normal tuition fees and if you sign up to those courses right before they start just to fill empty spaces some of those courses might only cost around 19 pounds and when you sign up for those courses you don't have to turn up to them but you do get registered as being a student don't turn up don't take any of the exams become a student today get your student card for just a 19 pounds and then for the next three years of your life enjoy free public transport in many major uk cities it's perfectly balanced now i'm sure many of you have your own exploits of how you exploited university or how you just got exploited by your university so go into the comment section below and tell me of your glorious situations for you might inspire the next generation of exploiters day two because this is college as well we need to make it somehow balanced hang on like spiff what are you doing here it's a big dance floor okay why is there no pat he's closed it all off for some reason smith is made in a barren wasteland right and we're on to the next challenge and this time it's themed around me here we go ah yes the wonderful beautiful tea garden ah it's fantastic and of course when enjoying tea why not use the perfectly balanced mug that's right i'm literally being sponsored and they're using my own match it's like they paid me so what is today's challenge this challenge is about creating a natural oasis a natural oasis relaxation and all that peaceful a hippie student utopia perfect i can do that the number one rule whatever you build you must always have more gardens than classrooms flower it up and get zen so welcome ladies and gentlemen to our glorious second challenge in today's video we must build a campus with as many gardens as possible we must build the ultimate zen tea room of a university but of course the previous twist to maintain because we're not working on our previous plot of land no we've received anna chess's plot of land which i of course presume will be immensely efficient gloriously strategic and surprisingly it hasn't made much money in fact it's only making 300 000 a year that's that's not very good and uh what what is this i mean sure it fits it fits the music bill a room filled with bins what is this room oh it's the student lounge i stay complete with more bins than anyone knows what to do even and and what what is this a coffee kiosk no right they're gone immediately gone pathetic terrible buildings okay so we've got our goal we have to build the ultimate lovely zen garden of a campus but we've inherited what can only be described as a nightmarish mess so um let's let's fix up this first start uh we've got a bunch of musical students and i've got to be honest i don't want to deal with them we can't make any money off of them so we've gotten rid of all of the intake and instead our new course is going to be money wangling for we're going to fill our campus up with parchos parchos are absolutely fantastic and they'll even lower the tuition fees so that it's cheaper for them to be here for the sole reason that we'll get more students now poshos are the perfect student to have for those lovely majestic buggers generate money when they're happy and if we fill our campus with lovely gardens then they're going to be very happy indeed but we're also going to clean up the mess of a campus by selling all of the music areas because quite simply we don't need them we will of course keep the greatest student lounge the world has ever seen so now that our university is filled with the crying faces of the dismissed uh i think we are potentially ready to start preparing for oh my goodness they are all throwing fits they are not happy at all i don't want to leave but go on get out my university you cheeky sausages all right and i think we're actually ready to start on next year here we go we're bam the new academic year begins and the money wranglers are going to arrive and we're bam look at this here are the lovely wave of incredibly posh british bastards marching their way to our university these are the people who will make us money so what is a posho a porsche is a fantastic individual who throws money at the things they like they may even make a donation if they're doing well this is what makes the posher one of the best students you can ask for for they will just occasionally and randomly generate money for you which is of course absolutely fantastically useful now we are generally losing money on a month-to-month basis largely due to the uh unique nature that this campus operates on but hopefully that will change given time on fantastic all of these students just leveled up and because they leveled up they gave us all 200 this is fantastic these students are glorious and brilliant and so in order to get more money off of them we want them to level up as much as possible so what's the best way to get them to level up well it's just to efficiently train them and make them happy but also the postures pay us whenever we actually fulfill one of their dreams and so many of the postures have a dream which is to look at this poster here which is a family tree so that they can look at their family and just by simply looking at this poster it is going to inspire them to give us five hundred dollars every time we make them happy they give us money it is perfect who knew fulfilling the dreams of rich people is all that mattered now one thing i also decided we should do to fulfill many of our student wants is to add a club and we're going to go for the book club the book club is great because it encourages and boosts the learning rate and reading rate of our partials and every time they level up they give us money so by leveling them up more the more money we make the happier they are so we shall turn all of the poshos into money money-giving nerds and fantastic is the end of our first year at this university how have we done oh lovely we've got the campus of the year award the student choice award and the rising staff award lovely stuff this will head us into the next year in fantastic style and pace as part of this moving into the next year i'm going to actually improve our library by extending it yes that's right we're going to maximize our library space and we're going to boost the learning prowess of our students by building a giant library reception that's right it's huge but it boosts their learning power by eight percent then we'll build the money wangling bookcase for getting rich quick this alone will boost the learning power by five percent then we'll need an additional computer lab which luckily we can just wham down here fantastic we're doing great and of course many of our lovely pochos would like a new flower planter to be added so yes i will place in our glorious flower planter over in my new garden that i've created welcome back ladies and gentlemen a brand new academic year has just started and that means chaos is ensued because you'll notice we've not just got poshes anymore no i've realized we could scam students even harder by actually inviting the music students to join however we charge the maximum quantities for their tuition and you'll notice we have not got a campus recording studio or a music teacher ah this is a problem basically they're not able to go to any lessons because well there aren't any lessons for them to have but their happiness is completely maxed out for we have a very happy fun campus i mean look at all of the beautiful greenery and because they're happy even though they're not even able to go to lessons they're still paying tuition fees and those tuition fees are making us a lot of money and because they're happy they won't even leave the school this is perfectly balanced also i've just realized how strong the bookworm club is our lovely safe friend here called delia he's a level 3 in the book club and well his learning rate is 212 percent that's right he learns 212 faster than everyone else this person's learning rate 221 they're absolutely insane meanwhile music student here 66 pathetic not even part of the book club but actually i've realized something these music students uh they're actually getting in the way they're going to clog up the entrances to the libraries and so we need a way of subverting their locations and forcing them into an area where the music students belong basically out of the way of the rich people consequently maybe we should build a recording studio and i've got just the plan for it if you see the goal of today's challenge was to build the most zen university possible so what better way to do it than force anyone going to this lesson to go through a giant hedge maze so that is exactly what we will do and if you see look the music students are already making their way over here to the class despite the fact that there's not even a teacher so first let us build our hedge maze okay welcome back i have now crafted the maze which all students must go through this is the pathway to their one lesson and hopefully it should take them several months to reach the end and yes i realized they got a head start just to reach all the way to the music room which doesn't even have a teacher so um they basically just have to just have to stand here and wait but hey that's fine they've got their class the other students will be along any year now good on you guys good on you you'll get there in no time so this is one of the lovely gifts i'm departing to rt who has to deal with my world but the next gift uh seeing how much he struggled with me walling off the entrances to the map i would like to say that i actually did that really nicely because uh since that point i've discovered a few more exploits for example you can't place an object on an existing object if i place a bin i can't put a bin on top of another bin the laws of physics simply don't let me but this goes completely out of the window when it comes to walls so you see i can place a wall and then put another wall on top of it issue this is that i own an auto clicker and i can set down a challenge dan's one job is to delete this and i'm going to make this a mind-bending horrible challenge by placing down a lot there's there's gonna be a lot of brick walls and he has to delete them that's all you have to do dad just delete this it's easy it's you just click on it and press sell you see what's better than making the students suffer but making my own friends suffer these are the things that make me happiest in life all right i've run the math and there should be well over 500 of these wolves now so uh all he has to do is click and sell all 500 of them and then then you should be set perfect ah it's going incredibly well with our students they go to their class just in time to see that no tutor has arrived and then they immediately turn around and leave but it doesn't matter because an entire month passes and they still pay for their tuition fees this is perfect it's fantastic it makes us money now another great way of gaining student satisfaction and making sure that they're happy is to actually fulfill their needs for example these guys want a horror film to be played and so we're playing a horror film and then this person wants a coffee kiosk i'm sorry filthy american you want a coffee kiosk you horrible horrible classical american right i've had enough of you you're fired that's what you get for demanding coffee on my campus meanwhile look at all of these posh people enjoying the zen garden oh they're having a grand old time here they just love a good flower patch and they love to pay us for seeing that flower patch yes you observe it and then you give me 500 that is how the world works look at flower patch give money ah it's the end of the year once more let us see what glorious awards we've got yes 72 pass rate that's fine because we failed a bunch of students look at this some rewards some great environmental attractiveness and oh look at this student choice award and campus of the year we got student choice award despite the fact that half of our students signed up for a course that didn't exist and they all failed classic well goodbye pathetic students that failed we have no place for you here no this is the land of the rich look at the merry rich people that graduated look at how happy they are i actually think this is a fantastic point to stop we've built a giant horrific hedge maze we've set up an impossible challenge for our team and we've built one of the greatest scams the world has ever seen anyway this is it for our first two challenges we've absolutely crushed it we've built a glorious giant park that takes up half of our campus we have classrooms that don't get used because 50 of the students aren't allowed into them but most importantly all of our students are happy and living a carefree life where it doesn't matter if they hardly turn up to class because their rate of learning is so high that just by simply glancing at a single textbook is enough to immediately make them get an a-star anyway if you want to pick up two-point hospital it comes out in early august and this is just the first video there is a sequel where we must complete two more challenges of even greater power and toughness and of course all of our creations must then be passed on to dan which is the most important part of the challenge watching dan suffer oh it's what i live for anyway thank you very much for watching a huge thank you to you glorious subscribers all of you who like the video you know who you are you majestic sausages and have you sat there wondering what to watch next look no further than this video on screen now hadn't chosen by myself to be perfect for you anyway i'll see each and every one of you in the next one have a lovely day and good bye for now

Channel: The Spiffing Brit

Views: 1,411,287

Keywords: The, Spiffing, Brit, scam school, two point campus, two point, campus, building a school, building a school for torture, funny, challenge, spiffing brit, video game, tycoon, school management, tycoon game, school tycoon, building a torture, funny moments, two point campus gameplay, british humor, exploit, money exploit, game exploit, video games, perfectly balanced, roblox tycoon, video game exploit, perfectly balanced game, two point studios, two point hospital, gameplay, game

Id: jNcYiSRiYvo

Length: 25min 33sec (1533 seconds)

Published: Wed Aug 03 2022

Reddit Comments

[u/fantasmoofrcc]

Not sure if Spiff got whooshed at "more bin time" or not...