brooklyn nine-nine moments we all know and love | Comedy Bites

guests who just got murdered he's leaving our plan worked we saved our own honeymoon and fun bonus we cheered up halt yes okay it's time to celebrate you know what that means this bee needs a c in her a oh my God this babe needs a coconut in her arms oh Oh I thought you were saying this music oh my God that was my reaction all right I'll go get us a couple of coconuts God I missed this place let me just soak it in oh yeah stale coffee fingerprinting ink whatever Charles is fermenting in his desk beans beans it's like I never left all right fill me in tell me everything I missed it won't take long only three things happen Terry chipped his tooth and had a lisp for a week listen up even I'm sorry did I say something amusing you answer me you son of a number two Santiago and Boyle wore the same outfit to work one day [Music] how does it look better on you and Captain banned headphones from the office due to the Gina incident [Music] so again your Alibi is a mysterious stranger handed you the gun made you put your prints on it robbed the store and then hid the gun in your underpants Well yeah if you say it like that it don't sound believable oh hey Captain did you get my report on the Findlay murder oh yeah looked it over nice work good thanks Dad why is everyone staring at me you just called Captain hold dad he said thanks Dad what no I didn't I said thanks man do you see me as a father figure Peralta no if anything I see you is a bother figure because you're always bothering me hey show your father some respect I didn't call him Dad no no no no Jacob I take it as a compliment it's not a big deal I called Vivian mom once and she's my fiance guys jump on that Boyle has psychosexual issues old news but you calling Hulk Daddy hey Daddy is not on the table here but you did call him dead dude you shut up you've done nothing but lie since you got here all right all right I was lying about the holdup but the dad thing that happened he admitted that his Alibi was a lie it was a trap all part of my crazy devious plan I believe you thank you son you want to talk about it later over a game of catch I'd like that so do you recognize any of these men I was hiding in the bathroom stall so I didn't see his face but I heard him he was singing along to the music at the bar do you remember what he was singing I think it was that song I Want It That Way Backstreet Boys I'm familiar okay number one could you please sing the opening to I Want It That Way really okay you are My Fire number two keep it going the one desire number three believe when I say number four I want it that away tell me why ain't nothing but a heartache tell me why you ain't nothing but a mistake now number five I never wanna hear you say [Applause] ah chills literal chills it was number five number five killed my brother oh my God I forgot about that part look I know that dog meant a lot to you so I got you this it's a dog his name's Arlo but you can call him Jason too or whatever seriously I can't just replace Jason with some other dog why not all dogs are basically the same watch this Arlo go hump that toy away from that look man I've been patient we have a case we need to work on it's time for you to get over it move on move on move on Jason was part of my family Rosa I loved him his humping was the only thing that got me through my divorce seeing him so happy made me believe that I could be happy one day too you wouldn't understand this because you have a motorcycle helmet for a heart but I need to feel this sadness so the only thing that I'm moving on from is you so I like have a dog now I've only had Arlo for a day and a half but if anything happened to him I would kill everyone in this room and then myself very violent eulogy I like it for you and you and you what are these these madam are STDs what are you talking about Buddy STDs save the dates for Viviana my wedding ah yes hey just out of curiosity how many people have you given STDs to Lots like a hundred what's going on uh oh okay I get it STD has another meaning you're gross no one else is going to think that everyone is going to think that but it's sweet that your mind didn't go there thank you it is kind of sweet will your first dance be too you give me fever will you be serving crabs at the reception do you have herpes guys this is my wedding this is important to me no more jokes you're right and we're sorry yes we love you buddy warts and all it's all right I made a rash decision I was itching to say it okay I'm done I have an STD so just RSVP or yeah the number's right on the instruments great come on Sir the math thing isn't the problem night shifts keeping you and Kevin apart you two just need a bone what did you say don't say it again I said you two need a bone oh Dare You detective Diaz I am your Superior officer phone what happens in my bedroom detective is none of your business don't ever speak to me like that again look Kevin is over yep because you understand the map nope because you guys yep you lost all control and you bludgeoned him to death there must have been blood everywhere but you got lucky you were in the surgical Suite it can be sterilized you never would have gotten away with it in your carpeted office that's not what happened don't say anything more and your office manager would have heard all of the screaming but she was at her grandson's play lucky again you're wrong you put Robert's body into a wheelchair and shoved it in the elevator it's a miracle there wasn't blood everywhere that's not true now you're in the garage with a corpse you panicked and left your phone in your office and you don't have your car keys but Roberts are in his pocket so you put him in his car and you take off you can't believe what you've done no you're flustered you have no GPS so you just start driving no next thing you know you're in the pine Barons and it hits you your uncle's cabin he has a place there you're the luckiest son yes it was you got lucky at every turn no I knew exactly where I was driving I left my phone in the office on purpose I was in a surgical Suite by Design and I didn't use some glass award that any idiot would clearly see was missing I made a rod out of a special dental polymer killed him with it then melted it back down it's already in a patient's mouth son thank you ladies and gentlemen I present Carl Lawson who stole three thousand dollars Santiago takes the lead with one minute left suck at Peralta oh no that's right oh no oh no you don't seem worried why are you worried bring in the Giants I ran a prostitution sting through Vice and arrested 30 guys for soliciting that's not a felony it is when it's your second offense which is the case for 10 of these gentlemen fun fact four of them are actually named John ironic anywho 10 more for Peralta accept your fate never five four three two one Jake wins Amy loses [Music] [Applause] look at times [Applause] Amy Santiago you have made me the happiest man on Earth I spent one whole dollar on this ring will you go on the worst date ever with me you have to say yes yes she said yes good boy cheddar bring me that Karma bun wait a minute this isn't the championship cummerbund this is some common cumberbund you're not cheddar these are some common Terry said he has some news from the office of commissioner one sure what does that human blister one now does she intend to demote me even further or perhaps she'll transfer me to the swamps of New Jersey so I can Patrol the sinkhole where she was spawned or it's possible the announcement has nothing to do with you oh good thank you berota you're right maybe Madeline wants to inform us all that she's a juicing a what a chooxon a Korean toilet ghost lives in an outhouse wraps her hair around your throat and chokes you to death while you move your bowels you know what I will give you six thousand dollars if the announcement is she's at jukison okay everyone I have some news so Madeline once is a Korean toilet ghost boring we already knew that Madeline lunch is dead say what now my emotions aren't overdrive well I know just the thing to cheer you up lunch is dead bagel bagel bagel sir I am loving this color on you but don't you think you should tone it down why in case I run into a family I'm not planning any trips to the Bronx Zoo

Channel: Comedy Bites

Views: 311,517

Keywords: Comedy Bites, best of brooklyn 99, bone brooklyn 99, boyle gives std, brooklyn 99 best moments, captain holt bone, guess who just got murdered, i want it that way b99, i want it that way brooklyn 99, jake peralta singing, jake solves the dentist case, peralta wins the bet, rosa gets a dog b99, the box brooklyn 99, the dentist episode b99, the gina incident, this b needs a c in her a

Id: fX5O_ejt3Ig

Length: 9min 54sec (594 seconds)

Published: Thu May 04 2023