Annie Lederman Steals The Punchline | TigerBelly 268

i'm living off the money i make on them right now i'm the worst at making money it's like i just the reason rogan put me on his podcast the first time was because i was out in the parking lot and he had his car one of his cars and the car i was living in and i was like why are we we do the same thing it's right there i go i was like how do you get rich and he's like oh my god he started laughing at me and like he pulled out a lot of hundreds this means nothing to me handed me 300 bucks and laughed in my face yeah yeah and then had me on the podcast i had a conversation with you about it too oh we'll let this go yeah i'm sorry no don't don't be sorry but i'm very sorry [Music] why would you tell your mom you killed somebody it's my question wouldn't you tell your mommy i would not i put in a letter but is he singing it to her what the hell what would your mom say why you do that i mean that's the first it just why why what happened yeah right well he um he fondled me mom in a subway why he do that i'm sexy okay yeah there we go thank you thanks mom um welcome to another episode of um you know family it's it's a podcast and um i didn't want to do it at first and five years later we've done it every week it's been [ __ ] fruitful and here we are um we've got characters in the room we've got all kinds of dynamic characters in the room we've got um my boy right here man uh remind me again uh uh gilbert that's right gilbert and his sister sophie what's her name your name gabby lover uh we've got george he's married given roma we got gorgeous married yeah yeah yeah yeah that is i know somebody [ __ ] the most [Laughter] i was like we got to get him to lose his virginity [Laughter] he's always in this he's a podcast nerd he needs to get out there yeah the whole time who knew do you believe that his penile has been inside you know a vagina enough vaginas to be married because i'm assuming i mean but he does have the blonde hair he could have [ __ ] only her he's handsome that's true yeah he seems but it's not about the looks it's about the energy the job the energy yeah he's got a clipboard he doesn't need a clipboard yeah yeah this is a nerd let me introduce people in the room uh we've got um my girlfriend who uh is uh i don't know some good news happen i'm gonna talk about it but god no yeah but she's uh she's killing it i'm proud of her i teared up a little earlier today very proud of her pregnant no no better oh something better than yeah it's better than the miracle of life yeah yeah yeah yeah miscarriage and then um there you go four she's abortion abortion and then we've got a guest here who um you know i always think you know that uh you know we don't look the same we're not the same ethnicity we're the same gender but um there is something about her that reminds me of myself it's my when i get high my eyes get really slim that and also something about your because one day i didn't even know you that well and you go what's up and then you showed me one of your breasts i don't know why classic probably to match your balls though there you go tip comes out and i go wow that's somebody that i can hang with that's how esther and i bonded yeah what she showed you her breast no it was the opposite she straight up came she said can i see your boobs esther is a yeah pervert and i think we need to just she is yeah um you like i've never said have you gilbert you've never said hey look at my dick uh once because you kept you pulled yours out i felt like i had to do this oh that's my god did you dock we could i didn't have the weekend oh my god congratulations thank you so much yeah so annie and i um annie and uh we don't really hang out but i just feel like um i want to okay we're kindred spirits there's something about her that's kind of like um sophisticated garbage thank you so honestly yeah yeah because i'm halfway treasurer's because my mom is from like a really nice amazing family and then my dad popped out of a tuna can yeah and then here i am yeah yeah that's what it feels like you know like my dad was a blue collar um he he was a street kid he didn't really have a high school diploma he was in a gang really that's so cool yeah he was in a korean gang in in when he was growing up in korea and then he um went into the military and became a boxer right yeah and then my mom comes from royalty yeah because her all her sisters are like doctor yeah yeah pedigree and then when they combine the two right and they have babies this is what comes out mad tv's alum hearing we're gonna be on a sketch show that's very popular no but just like you know drug addicted but then like so i have like you know i i'm not well read but i know some things yes and well red well red means nothing i fall asleep when i read i can't yeah yeah but like there's certain things i have interest in like film and i've always had but i'm also like um i have empathy but i'm also you know lazy and kind of a piece of [ __ ] i just got such a good idea what should we write remake twins with us in it oh wow well you're dating you're dating how i never thought you had a asian fetish he's i mean he's my living assistant is what we say publicly but he does everything for me wouldn't make me come but he does take care of all the chores he makes you come yeah yeah yeah dude through um oral pleasure or on penile penile both yeah he's a good boy but baby how do i i i'm all penile right or you yeah what is this oh this is terrible let's see just answer it pause is really wrong yeah it's rough it's rough you well the question after you was that was a lot you this is excessive blinking right right where are the other guys in the room yeah yeah yeah well okay enough said that was painful you can do it thank you wow rob schneider and the uh i say that is because i'm just not the correct person to be asking the question anything makes me come augusta a light bro oh my god that's amazing i thought you're gonna say the opposite i have i can come in my sleep in my dreams like i have legit adult wet dreams good for you yeah so i mean it doesn't really take a lot so no you're not the dawn in that room it's so funny she could have just given it to you but she didn't she didn't know she i like telling the truth too even right are you are you somebody that's easily can you easily orgasm well i bring i'm i'm like you know i i get a small vibrator to bring with me everywhere just in case you never know do you really oh yeah cause you just wait you know it's like i'm not gonna like yeah time is money you know we're in hollywood tick-tock tick-tock you started comedy though in east coast right in new york yeah yeah was that hard no it was well i guess so but it was like it felt easy i quit drinking and just after my first open mic because i went home with literally this least funny open mic like he was yeah yeah i couldn't believe it like i was drinking i quit jaeger before i quit anything else yeah and i was i went to my first open mic and i really wanted to do comedy as a profession from the beginning so i put all this pressure on myself and i wrote like a little set list of all like i had a joke that was like uh i never date jewish guys because or wait i have to date jewish guys because i'm lactose intolerant i can't have dick cheese like really just like the filthiest yeah yeah my mom tagged me an embarrassing picture on facebook her vagina made my head look so big sure it was like a crowning joke but like just you know and i had all these jokes written on my list and i dropped them on the way up and then i just blacked out and panicked and was screaming at everyone so then i was like sitting at the bar so depressed and this really unfunny comedian came over and sat next to me was like you know we all have good ones and bad ones and i was like no i'm gonna be good at this like you don't understand like imagine you've been doing this for three years yeah and the first day some [ __ ] comes up and it's like i ain't better like i was so sure i was better than i was like i can't talk to you i don't like you and he kept buying me shots and he was like let's do jager shots and i was like [ __ ] it and i was like all right i did a jager shot and i was like i'm an alcoholic please don't buy me drinks like i'm trying to quit or whatever yeah and he kept buying me drinks i'm like i don't like you i hate you please stop and then cut to me waking up in the morning on his air mattress fully clothed like reaching for more alcohol oh my god and then i just it was snowing out i was in bushwick and i was just like i'm never drinking again that was the bottom it really i had so many bottoms yeah you know and i just kept bouncing back a bottom you know how you handle bottom you can just drink through it it's like there's always a lower bottom yeah i i um my bottom that i should have quit drinking at was in santa fe i was i was drinking really heavily and i left it was my friend's 30th birthday party yeah and i went i was 21 or 25 and i uh i went like i was like oh my god it's your birthday buy me shots like that's oh my god it's your birthday like buy me drinks this is great and he kept buying me shots i was wasted and i was like so drunk i was like i'm gonna suck your dick for your birthday i'm gonna blow you and i was working i was working at this cowboy bar that's where we were drinking yeah yeah you had to work i'm like in a cowboy hat like yeah suck your dick sir and i had a motor scooter that used to drive around i go beepy potty and i'd pull my tits out yeah santa fe is such a small town it's like i was just totally known i was infamous yeah yeah and um and then we so i was like going to dry and he was like no you can't ride your scooter and i was like [ __ ] you everyone's like out on the patio looking at me i'm like tit out like yeah right beep beep later [ __ ] i like peel off and make a turn i'm done i wake up the next day with my face split open oh my god just like i had to get nine stitches it looked like my my the dress i was wearing it looked like someone had slipped my throat it was just blood i looked like carrie i had road rash i almost lost a nipple it was all about all of my tits for the next month after that my my pickup line at the bars was like hey you want to rub some neosporin on my titties who wants to do is like open gushy wounds wow and then my friend took me to the hospital everything but i kept thinking like at least i got those wounds instead of getting like the the wounds that come back on my genitals yeah every [ __ ] two months if i'd gone and [ __ ] my friend albert you've never had it so disgusting well you i had crabs in college which is why i think i do comedy when they when they diagnosed the crabs i thought it was so funny like there was no my only i was like couldn't wait to tell everyone well krabs was a hot commodity in the late 90s and early 2000s i remember i remember when snoop dogg came on power 106 and he was like i you know i got the little soldiers and everyone was like yeah so i thought crabs was the least they're the bottom best they were so funny i was like of all the stds to get hilarious i'm not a science guy but um i don't when they say crabs are they literal crabs people oh my gosh they're like yes they're pubic lice so if you have a microscope don't don't laugh at me you don't need them like what i want to keep going dude i just learned i thought they were tiny little crab mites yeah yeah that's why yeah yeah don't be don't be an [ __ ] it makes yourself look really big though when you use them you know what i mean but um so i like how you're pretending like you don't know what it's called [Laughter] he's been on magic yeah yeah so when you see um um when you have crabs and you look in the microscope do they look like crabs yeah they look crazy yeah they're little lice yeah yeah well i saw them first i was itching my mom was in town i was like mom there's something wrong with my vagina and my mom's like does not ever want to hear any of that [ __ ] ew i'm like i need you and then um i went to the my i left my mom at home and i went to the doctor or to the school nurse i was in college and she was like you don't have crabs and i was like like i do have gums oh you have crabs yes i could see them the girl that i saw before you i want to say her name but we had sex we call her dumb [ __ ] yeah yeah she after she we had hooked up the first time yeah she just looks at me she goes i just want you know i should have told you before but i have um stds i should have told you how many do you mean how many and which ones very much i don't know which one it was it wasn't specific but i go like i anticipated this so on the first the first month that we dated i got tested serially like i got a series of messages yeah yeah what did it come back and come back good job yeah no no started there it started nothing no no serious one okay yeah yeah thankfully but yeah i think that's something that you should say you know before yeah but it's like i mean like really i would have done it anyway i would have done it anyway i do feel bad with people with a heartbeat i had a friend in um asian um in college who had herpes and she would never tell guys she would like wait she'd [ __ ] them unprotected like three times so they fall in love you know that's nice yeah change the chemicals between them yeah she gets bonding and then she'd be like oh my god i just got tested we have herpes [Laughter] i was like this [ __ ] is brutal so i used to tell i would like have to tell him like wait she [ __ ] him even when she was having an outbreak not when she was having an outbreak she went oh okay but she could have been shedding it's like you never know yeah what what does herpe outbreak look like a herb because you know those cold sores that you get in your mouth those that's a herpes type one you can also get the same thing down there so like if i'm down there let's say you and i break up yeah you know i mean i'm at like um you took that really easily [Laughter] yeah i'm at hyenas yeah okay that would be the one yeah yeah in dallas right i'm on hyenas his favorite one of all yeah yeah you know and i don't like that the whole thing with that guy what what's his name again i don't know what his name is yeah i know i don't either but i like him yeah we break up i mean i do a great set right you go to hyenas which is usually the case is this real the life or hypothetical hypothetical okay do a great set and i see i mean a girl named beatrice oh great name beatrice sancho oh right and she's like i don't know what she is yeah she could be [ __ ] ethnically ambiguous she kills in commercials yeah yeah hollywood talk and you know i don't drink so i get her some drinks right next you know i'm at the hyenas what they put the [ __ ] motel sick you're raping her yeah exactly i'm glad we've established yeah this is a wraith good and so um she's like you want to lick the hoochie yeah i don't know how the kids say it i think that's how they say yeah yeah yeah i'll probably go yeah like a question yeah i have a question wait go ahead if she if she was like you want to lick it and then she poured like jaeger or something on her [ __ ] would you lick it off of her [ __ ] or would that be real it's so [ __ ] funny so ari and i shafir right met these girls at the comedy store once and this is when i was sober the last time and this she was so hot and she lived over there in beverly hills but like in an apartment right and we went over there and she was in the bathtub and she poured whiskey all over her snatch and stuff and she knew i was sober which is [ __ ] up how [ __ ] up is that she knows sober but she's like you know relapse yeah oh wow yeah i mean but she didn't say that but she's like just lick it right and i just like re-lips right i remember taking the fall i i turned on the faucet and i started splashing right so that i could just like dilute it yeah right i did it but my point is you should put some ice on it so it's on the rocks and she and then i remember this is probably pointless but she goes trent reznor did it i don't know why she said that i mean that's i would i would do it after you are kind of like asian trend residents thank you thank you with your face and hair so yeah so i meet beatrice sancho right she worry about the hotel right and she goes lick it i i she and then i'm down there and i see eat a pimple with a white head on it could be an ingrown we get this commonly it's a white it's a definite white head though no you want to see open sore oh or a pustule that's clear if it's a white head it's probably an in-ground okay what about this then what if i see right yeah a red bump but it's got cauliflower but it's got a yellow kind of like you know like a booger that had dried yeah that's a sore you don't want anything do i lick it or not don't i wouldn't like any even if it was an ingredient would you see what it tastes like it could be a crumb maybe she had a cupcake earlier that would be nasty if i sucked on it and i started crunching on the like on the wound and you're like yeah like what if she hurt it like a cracker well a good if it hurts her then it's definitely herpes oh it is yeah but i'm [ __ ] at that point because i think herpes sores are very painful even on the mouth oh i see okay so well you learn no i don't have herpes yet yeah yeah you know what's so funny when you say about like the bottom it's like i remember you know when i everyone knows about the story about when i played connie chong and i [ __ ] my pants on tv and that's how i got relapsed yeah but was it on the piano when she was doing that thing no no they never aired it was that the funniest thing that ever happened so i played connie chung and i and i and i when she serenaded yeah she get my pants and then they fired me from the show right but like a couple of months before that i had gone to tijuana and i had smuggled uh pills across the border and then i remember getting a hotel room which hole did you use what to smuggle them with hole no what i did was i didn't i didn't put it into my holes right i have very tight holes by the way oh yeah good for you thank you this is an old joke that i said but my [ __ ] is really tight my poop looks like angela pasta it's like the play-doh yeah so um no what i would do is i would take all the um um i would put cotton and ask for cotton and it would smash it all the cot in there so it wouldn't rattle right and then i would just put it in between i did tidy whities and just put it in between the crack so it's not in the hole and i would just kind of walk in a weird way you know and that's how i smuggled drugs yeah but that wasn't you're you're talking about no no so i was at a hotel and i remember taking a bunch of pills and then passing out and then the next day i woke up and getting a bunch of messages on my cell phone saying that i had missed a table read oh [ __ ] at fox which is like a network right right and that mo i think feel like most people would be like i think it's time to quit but me was just like you know probably always happens yeah i mean like you justified it in your [ __ ] head you know are you sober now i don't drink yeah yeah i don't drink but i don't i do like i do do hallucinogens and stuff like that which ones well this weekend i was like i don't want to talk about it because i don't want to like no no because experience no i i do stuff i mean no i don't i'm kind of a square in that way but um i don't i drink so rarely yeah but i've never tried um any hallucinations i wanted to so funny so i just feel bad because i do feel kindred with bobby and i do like when you were smoking weed again i was like you have to stop smoking weed and then i started smoking weed again and then i kept smoking weed and i was like yeah we never smoked weed together though no oh my god we won't one day and i'm just gonna yeah so like baby got some weird okay so when you so you were sober now you're smart well i was fully sober for like maybe four years yeah i know right yeah and then i smoked weed and i quit smoking weed i always go on and off with the weed and then hallucinogens i started doing um maybe like a couple years ago i started doing them and i feel like if i'm doing something that expands my brain i'm not doing it tell me about it i know you're getting all excited i'm excited i'm not going to do it i just want to know i want to live through you i've never i've never seen anyone so obviously about to do it what am i going to do yeah he's wearing glitter and he's like in a burning manner so you're going to do it this week and you didn't no last weekend so tell me about it we went to um uh death valley desert desert it was so nice i went with brett erickson and um carrie mitchell who they're um karen mitchell's not a comic she's the bartender of the comedy store brett is it kind of okay yeah and andy anders who's like a bunch of stan hope's friends were there and um it was really fun my friend jamie came it was just so fun so we did acid and mushrooms there was a little bit of molly which i don't i did do but i don't consider not a like i think molly is a hard drug yeah yeah because it takes from you it depletes you it doesn't teach you yeah yeah and um it was so [ __ ] fun a little special okay i do do some special okay yeah ptsd so when you do it i mean because we saw a doc what was the documentary which one the uh mushroom one no the oh that was the other show the unwell where they talked but also about ayahuasca ayahuasca right yeah and being a sober guy right and i know a guy i'm not going to say his name thanks for whispering is he black you don't need whisper when you say something no um he's quiet i know a guy and he said that once he's sober for a long time and he's got good sobriety but he goes one time i did it and i i don't consider it a relapse yeah with ayahuasca no it's like a it's like therapy medicine that's what he said helps with trauma but doesn't it also have like anti-addictive properties and stuff it helps people quit heroin yeah really yeah okay guys i asked my therapist if i could do it she goes i just don't think that you're you know but kasonji when he was here he said something really interesting because i had told you he's like i want to try it i was like we'll talk to your sponsor and he said no i can't so that in itself is the is where the deceit lies right you're already i think straying from your sobriety just by virtue of not wanting to let your own sponsor know that's true that's right there was a transparency there and said hey i want to try this like this and that right oh my god a.a is so hard to like ask i mean they'll come at you it's hard i remember i quit a i did a for 90 and 90 my 90 days which was once a day for 90 days and then i was getting my three month chip and i was like you know and i was at the like popular brooklyn one because i like to wear cute outfits and stuff i mean it was such a runway show i went back six months after just bang all the guys i wanted to bang um get it up couldn't get it [Laughter] um demons demons but so i was like doing my speech where i was and i was like up there with the microphone and i you know been doing comedy like six months and i was like yeah you know i just think i'm done coming to meetings thank you guys so much just so helpful and everyone was like no you don't they're coming up to me and i was like i think i'll be fine um because i felt like aaa was a problem for me i don't think it is for like i don't i think it's very good but it felt like i was getting too like worried about pleasing the people rather than doing it for my own health yeah well-being and um not to deter anyone from going because i think i really needed it and i i like that it's there when i need it but um also my my higher power because i didn't want to i don't believe in god that way i picked shaquille o'neal from kazam and i would pray to him in a genie costume like every night and people were there one guy was like you're gonna relapse you're not taking it seriously and i'm like all right good luck with god have fun with that he ain't listening yeah it's that that's a tough one the higher power thing giving it up to god her was like i was like i just quit i was like i just quit i understand what it means now it took me a long time like right now i would i would i don't think i would have a problem with it the way i did before yeah yeah but you see you're i mean because you were sober for four years and now that you're you know experimenting doing things you know i don't judge you i i don't care i mean i i care about you as a person right but do you think that you'll ever come back or no what to being completely sober yeah maybe yeah yeah probably i mean i don't think i'll ever drink i don't think that will ever be in my life that's not a thing i miss it's not a thing i want it's not like what it did to my life was really really bad and it's just not i have a problem with procrastinating so anything that keeps me from forward movement is something i need to stay away from which is yeah right now i'm like i i didn't smoke weed all day and i think i'm gonna just stop smoking weed but we'll see it is nighttime it is nighttime yeah yeah you know when the bong does rest hey guys we're gonna take a really quick break to share this amazing sponsor with you one two three sheath everybody sheath you guys sheath is my new favorite underwear um it's for men it has a little compartment for your uh members oh and it separates it from on the rest of your body yep and it get it's like having a high-class um penthouse in your audience yeah yeah wow we are super pumped for this new underwear sponsor you know i like to rock around naked right gilbert of course but with sheath it's better than being naked these underwear is genius or are invented by a soldier 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there's like a screaming thing that goes on when we come in and we're like sir sir do you mind leaving is he bothering me we both put our cameras on and like attack each other when we see each other i'm also her lawyer i'm always suing people for her i'm like i'm also her lawyer ma'am i'm gonna have to but it's like esther's doing stand up like it's an open mic right and then annie would be like commit to it finish the thought exactly finish the thought right and then and then esther's like i'm trying i don't know i don't know what the premise is well esther keeps pretending she doesn't know to do [ __ ] comedy she's doing it for 13. i i know she is one of those esther's so funny she's like i don't know how to write a joke and then she's just saying jokes all day i'm like esther it's like just you have to do tap tap tap yeah for one second she's so lazy there was a little bit of lasik well this is what i have as a premise right and then she wants us to write yeah yeah she's like um so i woke up yeah this morning a little late she's like you know people were just throwing her punch lines is that relatable yeah but she really is um i have to say about esther she's an anomaly she's so funny they're just so unique as a human you know she's very talented and um you know um i just i i just loved being there because in this pandemic i just hadn't really seen anybody and to see you girls you know such a fun hat it's such a good time over there yeah and this was did you guys give him a hard time for showing up double masked with a shield no we get it yeah we know he's crazy [Laughter] but but what do you really think though about you yeah in terms of like yeah in terms of me but in terms of like me being you know double masked and you know acting that way i don't have any problem with how anyone is protecting themselves during this i think that like i think it's crazy that people are complaining about wearing masks it's like a nothing thing to do it's just it takes no time you can make you can buy a cute one that looks like you're eating someone else [Laughter] yes you can buy them there's a link on my instagram yeah in my bio so those are yours yeah these are mine but you can wear them it's like fun to wear masks i just don't think it's a problem and you know people people that say oh if you don't want to wear a mask it's up to you but the whole point of the mask is so you don't give it to other people right it's not about so i don't i just i get it i don't i don't shame anyone i mean did you see that jamie just got young jamie just got it i saw him corona oh rogan rogan vernon oh he did yeah texas is he in texas right now yeah yeah i mean so you're just gonna it's like i don't want to get it i really don't want to get it i don't want to get and also what happens is because you know santino got it oh i didn't know that when well it's out so i i don't i don't feel bad about it but yeah he just got out of quarantine i just saw him i almost saw him three weeks ago but did you know i was remember when we i was mad at you yes i want of course i want to talk can we talk about that when i was mad at you what how mad oh my god i would not oh i wanted to end her i wanted to end her [ __ ] career oh wait was it the chelsea thing yeah yeah oh i know this story yeah i can't wait to talk about it yeah yeah so i i want to say this all right i i literally had to think about like you know i mean think about it before i even brought it up yeah so it's it's so it's been far in the past that i don't even think about it right and number two i love you a lot yeah i love you too i [ __ ] hated you though and uh so we do the ch i would like to hear your side of the story okay okay okay okay so i'm oblivious by the way of him even being mad at me i mean now i know obviously because he screamed at me publicly in front of so many people did i really so she really yes in the hall of the comments i was so surprised i did not think you were mad at me okay so doing chelsea lately was the most stressful [ __ ] [ __ ] i mean i have never been more nervous to do anything in my life because it was it was just very tense like i get there i've never met uh chelsea before i think i've done it like two or three times by the time i did it with you yeah but when i first i didn't know chelsea i was flying in from new york to do it they were like don't look at her like don't look her in the eye but look near her and don't like and they're like make sure you jump in but don't interrupt chelsea and like all these things like they had all these rules and it was very stressful and i had not been on tv before can i interject real quick i want to just add on yeah may i yeah okay the reason why it's stressful okay is is that you don't you you shoot at two o'clock and you have to go to universal city right right and sometimes you at noon they don't have the topics yet oh it's so stressful right and then all of a sudden you get these topics right five things that have happened right and you have to quickly come up with five angles or jokes on each topic on each topic right can i get a shout out yeah because the last two years you did chelsea he would not wake up until like 45 minutes before and he would have nick youssef and i wake up really early yeah yeah just waiting for the [ __ ] topic yeah yeah so we could write his jokes for him yeah right so all right oh my god the power dynamic but in a show like that right like if you do david spade's show for instance what's it called uh lightsaber lights out right you can say a joke and then you can turn to whoever and go can i say that over again right yeah and they're like yeah take it as many times as you want right and they can just fill in the laughter alright right but with chelsea you know you have to say it perfectly or she'll rip you apart and she'll not ask you back like she'll be or she won't ask you back or you know there's all these other things that are at play so now you're there right in front of a gigantic studio audience it's so many people so many people it's hundreds of people and by the way always like a couple of my bank tellers and stuff i always brought random people if anyone recognized me from chelsea i'm like do you want to come yeah yeah you want a picture they're like we're good yeah yeah and so you're there and then here's another here's another thing is when you come up with your bits sometimes this happens right you you get a writer and you have to pitch them the bits and meanwhile in 10 minutes you're on air and they're doing you're not even a girl the girl i'm in full makeup they're they're like close your eyes i'm like i can't they're like putting eyelashes [Laughter] yet they're like are you ready they're like we're miking him like no yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah you gotta put the mic on right so you're about to go out and they and then somebody will come in the room and go yeah um so-and-so is already doing that joke but then you're you're and then you're being hold on to the set you go what do i do then what the [ __ ] do i need and then you're like i would have it folded up i would have my notes folded up yeah yeah yeah yeah trying to like memorize them again oh my god oh my god oh my god yeah like i'm lying down yeah like don't look down i'm like but i have my notes are there yeah in fact one time chelsea wasn't there wanda sykes was there tg miller miller and i are on the panel right and we remember going like she's there they're about to go and me and tj no wonder sucks we turned her and we go what's up wanda and she goes like this and that gesture [ __ ] me up wait why don't i go i don't know what i'm doing now i don't know why was she mimicking chelsea i think maybe that's what she thought that the role was chelsea was so would be so different with me every time i did it too like yeah one time she would like like because i didn't know her at all it was so nice for her to put me on i cannot believe she put me on the show and so i was like we're walking down this the hallway and she's like hey girl and she would like tickle my stomach and be like mama like oh my god just little old me i was like an open mic like thank you and then and then other times she'd walk down the hallway and she'd be like i'm like yeah yeah was i invited here yeah i don't know i have to also say though that without it in that chunk of my life right i wouldn't have had the numbers on the road it was amazing it was amazing it changed my life and we're grateful we're just complaining about the stress it was just so stressful the the timing of it because chelsea at that point i mean i don't know how early you did it on she was so kind of over she didn't want to do more takes which actually made the show hilarious yeah because she'd just be fumbling through the thing like whatever and they just put the thing up she called me amy lieberman like five times yeah yeah i think she might even call amy schumer or let's cut to now the night the day we do it okay so there's all this stress and the um okay so i don't remember the topics or the jokes or anything but i remember it wasn't didn't go well okay i remember when we got off you could say that again you can see well i figured out what it was when i watched it i realized what i didn't realize about the way you were delivering the jokes because i was always waiting for i was a you you have to jump in if you don't jump in with you you are famous okay this was like all i had so it was like so that's all i had too no no i agree with that i'm not i'm not okay no no i just i just i'm trying to explain like i didn't have any of like i get it i get what you're gonna perception camera and stuff perception of me your perception of me you know me is different than the perception i have of myself and maybe you're in your head you're like well this guy was on a show before right i didn't realize that you were okay so when you delivered your jokes you would you would you would tell the joke possibly do an act out and then you would look at the camera and you would hold a look and that was like what the laughs would like it would kill right i didn't realize the look holding so what i was doing was i was so obsessed with my own getting the jokes out i would hear a pause when it was you were like continuing to deliver the joke and i would think the joke was done so then i would jump in to get the joke but i was cutting your joke off okay can i say this yeah okay that's correct yeah right but what i saw and i was a [ __ ] no no what i saw was this okay i would wait because i know that you were jumping the gun yeah so i waited for you to do your joke first yeah right you would do your joke first right and in my head i'm like okay i got the two guys out of the way right right now it's my turn to do my joke right they already you're you get one shot right so halfway what the first time right i did i wasn't even able to tell my joke because you did your joke i forgot who the other guest was yeah who was it and then it was my turn to talk and you did a second joke i wish i had a joke to interrupt you i know but you had a second joke and then after your joke chelsea goes okay now we're going you know commercial break right so now i know now i know we have to go to the next topic and so in that [ __ ] chunk nothing i said nothing right and so i i turned him i turned to michael cox and and he comes up to me and goes i i i know i saw oh and i go what the [ __ ] bro oh no that was my strongest one that was my strongest one right he's like i know but you can't you just deliver get get out get out in the first place in the first better than i thought in the second half just get your first joke out right i know but everyone's [ __ ] worked hard because i didn't even say anything right so now you have an external locus of control right now we're back no bat now back too right so i go okay this bit is you know i'm gonna pause and do the punch line right because the first one is obviously just a setup right so i do the setup right i do the pause she goes right in she goes right in and right no laugh no laugh for me right she goes right in right then you know at least and then the other comic does it right and then also commercial break michael comes up to me michael's sweating now [ __ ] because he knows that like my eyeball why didn't he tell me why because we don't know because everything's moving so fast right everything's happening so fast right and now i'm whispering things like you know i'm gonna kill her that's so and i have no clue she has no idea yes absolutely what's the next topic like i hope i remember my jokes so then the third one right was the worst one and this is not your fault i mean all right the third one's not your fault right so mind you right i'm on this whole show i haven't seen anything funny yet and i've been i've been on camera for about 20 minutes yeah just premise i'm just a guy that just said sitting there right oh my god i've been feeling the sinking feeling when the commercial break comes is really it's like unmatched like you don't when you haven't gotten your joke out wow i'm literally also having thoughts like um maybe i could just you know work at the store [Laughter] you know i mean like not just a doorman but like you know maybe promotions oh right like i'm thinking your whole life is my whole life is flashing before my eyes right and the third one i'm about to tell the joke and they do a thing where chelsea just interrupts me and she goes fortune themes to her she doesn't even on the panel right i think fortune future comes out in like a lingerie or something and does a dance it was a bit that like no one was told about so the whole show i [ __ ] ate it and then i remember thinking to myself i hate that girl annie my number one enemy wow you know i have a lot of enemies on the wall right yeah but like you know she's my number one and then what what what did i say to you at the time oh and then like we get like okay so we get off stage and like i know it didn't go great but i'm like whatever you know i'm just sort of like i don't like at this point i'm not feeling fully responsible i'm like we all kind of didn't have a good show but i also didn't give a [ __ ] yeah yeah and then cox was like wow that was a rough one i was like it was like you know and then i was like oh like the lights got darker and i was like oh my god we bomb my parents are gonna watch this is terrible and then um so when i see bobby at the store later at night and i go oh that sucks like we didn't do good and he was like yeah okay and i was just kind of like i had no clue like i just had no clue right right i just like am wild i don't there's no because it was pinned it was like i you know i i had it just in my chest and everyone was like i was like and i was like bobby i'm so sorry i would nev and you're like you're supposed to make everyone look good and i was like i would never enjoy you are trying to make me look bad and i was like i would never try to make you look bad right and it was like that kind of how long yeah how long did it take for now for me to to get back because i feel like to be friends again yeah i feel like what you did was the right thing you did the same thing tiffany haddish did what timmy had we've talked about on the show when she was here that she betrayed me right and then there was a relentlessness on tiffany hatcher's part to get me to like them again do you think i think you did i think there were times right socially right that you i just didn't know you didn't like me ever so i was just treating you regularly no no in my head i'm like wow she's crafty really she's probably she's probably thinking right we're all cool now but in my head i'm like wow she's saying hi to me and flicking that's where the self-centeredness comes in that's what i tell you like you always you have these hang-ups about you think people are thinking of you right and they're not everyone's just moving about and doing their own [ __ ] wait were you mad at me when we did the nbc thing what nbc thing remember when we did finesse williams nbc thing remember he was doing a oh my god this is how much you work you piece of [ __ ] this is how successful you are who's finished snl i love them no i don't remember that but okay freaking out you're like because you have a thing where you're like this is my last job every time you have a job you were like i know you were like you're like oh the executioner am i bombing it's like i mean the screaming am i bombing a little bit is bombing but no yeah i think you pulled your dick i think you did get naked again but it was like you know what it was like they showed us a video and we made jokes about it right animal video or something because but i'll tell you why i'm only like that in in jobs where it's like i did this wasn't a part of my dream right panel shows were not a part of my dream it's not my skill set you know i mean i've always wanted to like i like acting and i like sketches and i like being big and controlling things you know and also showing my muscle right doing um panel shows that's why the david is that what you call your deck what your muscle yeah my yeah my muscle right that's a good one but like so the finesse thing i don't remember it but what happened you just were like freaking out running around clothes were coming off yeah you're having a breakdown you're like oh my god this is a big network i'm like bobby i think it's fine you're probably going to get several more tv shows [Laughter] yeah i think you're fine yeah but yeah when did you start liking me again how recently i took a year oh okay that was a long time ago yeah yeah it took about a year year and a half i um i just remember forgetting oh you know and and then seeing around what i also like about you is observing you i always i like to observe you around other comics to see if other this is so gross i want to hear it i'm going to tell you okay but this is a gross part of my personality i know it's disgusting right but there's also i like to see people's trajectory mm-hmm you know okay let me let me know what should you say on this podcast before you were like you were like um i like to know where i am power wise with people and i was like he's never thought i was close to him that's what's so funny yeah do you remember when you brought me on stage once and you were like in the or and you were like wait go back like you started to say my name and so i started come forward like no no go back why are you up here already and i was like oh so i went back and they were like you were like why would you listen to me jesus i was just [ __ ] with you come up and i was like jesus yeah they outfit me so hard in front of everyone i was like oh my god audience i'm so it was funny i liked it yeah i'm sorry for that but um i've always been like that and um i remember that's why when i started in san diego a lot of local people didn't like me because they used to say the word opportunistic do you think that was what it was it wasn't the being asian yeah it wasn't the full-blown rich racist people no i just i just found myself like hanging out with who the funniest guys are right that's good rather than who's the best person in his heart well that's cause if you if you use that as your gauge you wouldn't get anywhere it might be laughing yeah right and i and and that doesn't apply like in aaa meetings in a meetings i'm just i'm friends with everyone and i wanna right but to me um stand up and and and show businesses you know a war in a sense right i don't look at it as a happy you know i mean joyous place it's you know you're it's a competition it's like but has corona helped you with that well not only corona has helped me with it but um this new i almost have a year now so i have a new sponsor and i'm you know i think the corona the pandemic being sober and going to therapy as well has um shifted a lot of things within me and um now i enjoy you know could i be working more or do i miss stand up yeah but the pandemic has um made everyone kind of on equal ground and i know except you see some of the people that are working a lot you're like what the why are you trying to get ahead of us like taylor how many [ __ ] taylor thomas and how many shows you have to do every weekend i'm like [ __ ] you're already 25 with a netflix special okay yeah yeah yeah yeah take a break and the bank is good because they've got bangs and they look good which i'm like yeah like who does that i know but it's in in that sense like it does it puts everyone on you know i mean the starting lineup mm-hmm or the starting line is always straight line starting line and it it it it there's the stress of the cup the competitiveness and the that i was saying the competitiveness of it has gone away what that wasn't really a hard word i thought i was like a different word yeah no i have a difficult saying you know i honestly think that that's probably your this would be my guess you being an actor and having a lot of success in that and then obviously i'm sure you've gotten rejected a million times makes you more competitive and stand up because standup isn't it really isn't that competitive if you think about it yeah we are doing different things i remember you said that to me when i was like around the time when rogan was giving me wads of cash and thinking it was funny which i'm like that joke's still funny joe come on let's do it again you were like you're like wait you're broke you're like why are you broke and i was like i don't know and you were like do a podcast what are you doing and then you were like um you don't have to worry about he's like you and you said there's no one like you yeah i do agree with that i i've well i hope you agree you said it well not only that did i say it you say it it's just but that's the thing it's like i look at people right like esther is one of uh somebody that i can look at and go and people some people go well she's not you know she can't do an hour and destroy for an hour or whatever but you it but you but in my mind i'm like yeah but you you don't get it yeah she's the full package right right yeah she is she doesn't need to yeah right because she can act you're right she's just her personality and the way she looks and the way she moves and everything about her she is so original she is on periscope opening like cans of soup and people are like esther like they're watching her yeah [ __ ] nothing she's she's so there's so many like things i've said about her it's like she's just like this she can just do nothing she has it you have it right yeah you do and you have this weird you know um charisma and there's just something about you that's uh you know i'm not interrupting now i am when do you i do when what do you miss stand up going to clubs and stuff i do but um i also don't it's also i didn't realize how much anxiety i had around doing my sets every night i was so anxious all day freaking out panicking yeah and so not having that is really nice but i'm hoping that this fought this carries over to when stand-up comes back i can be more chill about it i i think that for me what's going to be great is because i'm there are certain things about stand-up that i never really thought was um important to me which is um connecting yeah i mean i miss connecting with my fellow comrades in the business i miss um the the ritual and the lifestyle of it and it really is um something that i feel like when it comes back i'll never stop doing it yeah i mean either right there's something about doing a show with your friends and then going hey let's go to greenblatt's and eating with a bunch of comedians and then people you know gesselnek or somebody will stop by right and then there's a comic that's newer do you notice how he said something that's successful he picked a successor yeah someone like that yeah yeah yeah or you're hanging out with somebody that's you know kind of new and then having the whole table roast them he doesn't even know their name we couldn't come up with one delilah's theory checks out yeah you know whatever their name is but like whatever their name is um until it's on the wall i don't know how about this then will burkhart there you go will burkhart is a white kid who i've i brought on the road right and he hangs out with jay collings and all those guys brent moore and those guys but he's a newer guy he can do 30 minutes right he's a great opening act for me i like hanging out with him right and i think he has a big future but do i when i'm with will burkhart is there some roasting going on yes yeah you gotta roast you have to rest they have to learn to be funny in conversation and not get their feelings hurt yeah because it's yeah that that's it you have to uh get tough a new layer coming back yeah you have to like learn to talk [ __ ] to 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off through this month hellotushy.com tiger belly enjoy the rest of the show because there's something about um doing a set like a late night set and you know you're bombing but you have to change it in the spot in the moment and you have to survive in those situations and i think the roasting and poking and a little bit of bullying is healthy because i do because when somebody is bombing on the tonight show right and they've done thousands of sets in the or right and bombed in the or they know how to handle it right there's something about bombing you know um with honor right you we bomb with honor all the time where it's like it's not going well but you know what i'm going to win this right the audience is not going to [ __ ] beat me yeah right and you walk off stage you can sleep that night right you go wow they really did beat me that's i really didn't think they were gunna yeah have you ever had a ball a bomb that sits with you i was headlining in uh philadelphia worm from helium two christmases ago no um uh what's the other one the one they had one in uh san francisco punchline punchline yeah punchline and my mom came my parents came and my mom it was christmas she threw a wrapped present onto the stage when i was three minutes in and had not won the audience yet so then i had to take the present and address that something had been thrown at me i had to then your headlining i'm headlining i had to then introduce my mom i had to then unwrap the present i had to explain it was a my mom is was at the time i was owned an ebay drop-off store [Laughter] for a hobby because she's making money but um she liked seeing the things and um doing the research and so she had gotten all these things from a nursing school and one of the things she got was a a fake arm that had that nurses were using to poke ivs in and stuff so it had like fake cuts in it it was this like arm and when she sent me when she threw up the the box i went what is this one of those rubber fists like yeah yeah and then it ended up being kind of one of the rubber and then it was like hard to and then i'd be like my mom has an ebay drop-off store like the four deal virgin but it was after that and it's and i j it was just like this a lot of explanation i was so hurt that my mom was heckling me physically with objects i was so upset yeah and then i didn't want to hurt my mom so i didn't want to like yell at her or kick her out that i just bombed like the entire it was just the most uncomfortable sweaty i felt so kind of like unsafe and all that it just was really bad those are the worst ones because especially when you have like 30 or 40 minutes ago right and you're bombing hard and there's nothing that you can do like you threw out your best joke right and it got nothing they got nothing and now you're in it right and you can't really show what you feel right you can't this is how you feel oh [ __ ] i want to go right you have to still do a yeah you guys didn't like that one either huh but yeah inside you're feeling this thing oh my god when you have to end with going like well take care [Laughter] i hope you guys uh do well in life i'll never see you again right yeah or um or then early on when i was headlining i would steal like hacky you know what i mean jokes like you know me oh you're cancelled what canceled yeah i would say stuff like um um i'm available for children's parties after you say a dirty joke yeah right the go-to or the go-to's right and then people are like still here mom when you're at it bill hicks did that yeah oh you're like oh [ __ ] you know what i mean when they catch you that's bad yeah i also i bombed an entire weekend at foxwoods casino entire weekend the most painful like that was the worst i've i've never been back one time right i remember doing foxwoods there was a curtain right i laid with my shirt off behind this curtain like this and i was crying i was crying i could still see the audience get up that was the most weird show that was weird they had sofas in the front too yeah yeah i just remember being in the bag like this crying and just another thing you just can't contemplate your life yeah yeah no i thought i should quit i was like i should do go commercial acting yeah i okay so i at that time i had a show on e that literally no one watched but i got a little bit like okay i've made it it was after chelsea ended and then e was doing like all these sample shows and stuff yeah yeah and i was like you know i didn't let myself go as far to be like i'm the next chelsea or anything like that but i was like maybe i'll have a show and i can just tour and i'll be fine no so i've been focusing on the show and then i was like guys i gotta leave early i gotta leave on thursday because i'm doing a weekend it's gonna be great i'm a headliner and um i fly out to connecticut and of course it's kind of close to some friends i have you know i'm like people from college are coming i'm like come on it's gonna be great we'll go to the casino i mean i bombed from the second i said one girl was like you're not funny and i was like you're being well you're actually bad at your job too because you're supposed to be laughing like you're and then they're all like [Laughter] and then of course my openers are the hackiest pieces of [ __ ] and they're crushing they're doing so i know and then my openers who are so bad are coming up to me like do you want some tips and i was like absolutely not get away from me but what but what is it and then at my last show it was on sunday night the owner's son who also does stand up was like do you want an edible and i was like no i'm not going to smoke and go on stage am i going to get high on stage and he goes it can't get worse and i'm like give me the edit and he was right because and then my opener was bombing for the first time it was so exciting he hadn't bombed the entire weekend he was bombing so hard and he was sweating and he did 45 minutes because he was trying to get a laugh right never got it i was like join my club [ __ ] wouldn't get off the stage they're lighting him over and over again by the time he gets off the stage i'm the highest i've ever been in my life and i was like oops yeah and then it ended up being fun because i was just [ __ ] around and stuff but it was just so bad so then on the plane ride home i'm weeping okay i'm just crying so hard i'm i have the window seat and then there's this black guy next to me he's about 50 okay he's in a suit he looks like a good guy but you don't know yet until you talk to him yeah so he goes what's wrong is an accident african accent i go oh i just you know i i just had a bad weekend i am a comedian i bombed the entire show it was so painful my friend from college came i'm so humiliated and i go um what do you do and he was like oh wait first he goes maybe you should try thinking he's like you know what i think you need to do you need to try thinking about other people he goes try doing something for someone else and it was so cutting and so true but like painful and then i go okay well what do you do and he's like i'm a doctor i was born in africa i was the only person in my village to get out i won a scholarship i went to france i studied i got my degree i now work with doctors without borders i'm going back to africa to save aids babies [Laughter] and i was like do you want free tickets to the comedy yeah yeah yeah it was just so humiliating it was like an angel next to me yeah he was like try volunteer work i was like try doing something selfish it also feels good the worst is when you have an opener a local opener and they do a reference and the audience laugh yeah just like benningham junction and the whole people laugh and you're like bunny can't jump [ __ ] you i mean and then it's like you because you don't know the area yeah right and people laugh at [ __ ] local [ __ ] that you don't even [ __ ] aware of just like the tits on the highway five you're like what is this [Laughter] you know what i mean because they used to be you know the uh on the um i think it's the five cat pelton yeah they have those nuclear right and they look like breasts so headliners when i was an opener right headliners would come down and always do a bit about those breasts i just was just going what the [ __ ] yeah what does that mean what do we unhelpful advice unhelpful advice with bobby kalila and annie leaderman it's letterman and that's black scent uh it's r.i.p long story short i can't fish my now fiance i grew up in a small town that was super against the lgbtq plus community i felt my whole life i had to hide my sexuality from my family i apprenticed i pretended to be a guy as i talked with this girl for a few years as a female before meeting my now female fiancee i cannot put into words how much we fell in love with each other one year i thought this [ __ ] is too much and decided to meet her and it was magical fast forward years later we are getting married but i can't shake off what i did to her i feel i am responsible for a lot of her insecurities i mean am i a [ __ ] person or do i move on or what wait how did the i don't understand what how did the cat fishing happen he basically acted that she was a guy the whole time and then it's couple a woman yeah they are females so a woman that pretended she was a guy yeah and started hitting on this other girl online they fell in love they fell in love met her in person right revealed she was a woman and and then the girl was cool with it she was cool with it but apparently there's lots of insecurities and it's almost like this person we'll call her low she can't shake off the feeling that she had lied and it's all based on a lie yeah but without the lie they would never be together yeah i've gotten tricked by a girl that looks like a boy really mm-hmm i forgive her yeah how'd that found out well she just looked kind of like a boy i mean i knew she was a girl but the fingers got in she creeped on up she got a couple knuckles in yeah i've never been catfished is that a bad thing i feel like now it's hard to catfish but there are like we see in like we watch 90 days beyonce yolanda yeah i mean you once you're past 50 it's very easy to be catfished because you're just you don't know how the internet works and you know williams you know when when she remember when she was really after williams yeah no and why would there be an s oh yolanda i'm here but i'm at it you'll notice kids me too it's like [ __ ] it lock her in a room and i'm being real it's like mom are you you're your [ __ ] mind it's so sad he's not gonna [ __ ] he's not real haven't you had to do that to your friends with real boyfriends to her like he doesn't like you you just have to people just are so they want their their fantasy to be real so bad that they will just they'll i've lost friendships over telling people the truth about where i'm like this person's disrespect they're obviously not into you and they scream at me and are mad at me and don't want to be friends with me anymore and it's like do you want the truth or do you want to it's like literally the matrix yeah like do you want yeah or the blue pill yeah i i've never been i haven't been there since i was like in my early 20s like fallen somebody for the out that heart have you do you fall people for people that hard i get anxiously attached to people sometimes it depends on if they like remind me of my mom or dad honestly it's like it's all childhood wounds so it's if the if a guy it gives me a lot of attention and i'm not it's usually like people i'm not that into at first and then i'm like oh i'll give them a shot and then the minute i bang them or something they withdraw then i'm like wait why don't you love me like don't you aren't you into me like i get very like anxious i've put my like my i'm giving them my i need their approval for me to be something but i've worked on that it's codependency it's codependency i have the same thing but i try to mask it so i'm really like kind of [ __ ] myself so i try to play cool girl a lot when truly that's masking my codependence right my feeling is really like please don't leave me i need you to show me validation right and all of these things and that's why we're perfect codependent addict yeah so you know it's so good narcissist but he's not a you're not he's not a bad narcissist no he's open about it he's not a true narcissist because we went through this i'm not a narcissist at all what the [ __ ] are you talking about so we because you're talking about yourself i watch [Laughter] we're on the spectrum of narcissism comedians there's a there's um you have narcissistic traits but you're not a true narcissist because true narcissist does not know how to show any kind of empathy or love or reciprocation they're only out for themselves and they are i don't feel when the natural disaster happens yeah right and have you ever had this where you're watching the news right and you see like oh like sandy hook right that's not a natural disaster the most unnatural disaster of this interesting example yeah like natural disaster like 9 11 when the wind blew the building it was crazy so gusty that day all right not a natural disaster right does that a tragedy happen right sandy hook right and you know for me it's like i remember the day when i was watching cnn or whatever and it was when i was watching the playground yeah yeah and i was just like um just in tears yeah right and just looking at these poor why did it bump you at the show you were on you're like it was supposed to be the mad tv was coming back out yeah so i mean i have a sense of like i'm a human being be careful with that because what i learned about narcissism is that you're not you're talking about being a psychopath or a sociopath where you absolutely have no remorse or feelings towards tragedies narcissists have feelings in fact the worst thing you can do to a narcissist to shatter them is to leave them being left because narcissism at the root is true in security that's how it's bred and because they're not usually a an adult that is now a narcissist was a kid who was over indulged in praises but under under indulged emotionally i'm not like that simultaneously i don't i'm not like so that's what i'm saying you do have narcissistic traits but you're saying leave me see what happens i've gone into like i've gone in a rabbit hole of like narcissism because i realized like there's so many narcissists in my family yeah and i think that's why i'm coding we do have traits so that we're saying we they're yeah and i think that's important to have that cell sense of self-promotion is necessary to make it in this industry i think you're great bobby you've got nothing to worry about you're working on yourself as long as you work on yourself that's my criteria for people in my life if you're we're all [ __ ] up we all have dents it's like what makes us cute and unique and it's cool but if you're not working on like handling your triggers and stuff like that i want nothing to do with you because it's not like i dated a guy who was had so much ptsd from childhood abuse which i also have pt ptsd from stuff in my childhood but you know i work on it and he wasn't working on it and it's like when you do that you're just an unsheathed sword and you're just slicing everyone around you like why am i getting screamed at same oh you know and it's it's just you know and i understand where he's coming from and i forgive him but i wasn't going to be around that yeah that wallowing is so not cute just sit there and wallow and to know that there is a solution but to not take that solution right because it's really yeah and i think that everything everyone's happening to you for the worst yeah the worst yeah but i find that like that happens like i have i i had a childhood friend who had who now has borderline personality and um that is the one reason why like i cannot have a relationship with him at all he is a victim of everything he he and he's so hot and cold he does he's very abusive verbally and then the next thing he's the most apologetic person he's yelling at you one second and then like just profusely apologizing and then that's not actually that bad though [Laughter] that doesn't mean borderline sometimes people just aren't catch themselves in the middle of screaming and then apologize that's true what do you guys find about we don't fight that much but we did he was late like i was like do you want to come with me because i like when he drives me and he missed the dog because i had the dog all day and um he was like yeah but he was doing the laundry this actually makes me sound so bad andre but i told him ahead of time i was like i'll be there in a half an hour and i was afraid i was gonna be late so i like get there and i text him like i'm here and he's like okay i have to change the laundry and then it's like eight nine minutes and i'm like how [ __ ] long does it take to change the [ __ ] laundry so i take the dog out he's not in the laundry room and i'm like screaming and i'm like wow i'm like screaming and the neighbors are like what are you doing and then he comes and then but it was fun but not that i'm working on i'm getting better at it but he doesn't really do anything wrong ever no i don't think that's borderline borderline is like um bipolar but faster so you rapid cycle your mood so you go through like 10 different moods within an hour yeah that was my ex probably so crazy am i like that no no no no no [Laughter] like even when he's worried about like cancel culture and stuff he's such a sub he's such a simp he's like the gentlest yeah softest like i remember when we first started dating he would always go on podcast and talk about his like sexual prowess with me this is before anyone even you'd even posted a picture of me yeah and i would listen and i would giggle cause i'm like oh it's just what he has to do pretend that he's this like big mighty you know sexual king when he really like he's such a simp yeah and i love him for that he's on his stomach yeah he's a real belly boy he's i can just imagine you just puckering her ass up yeah he's a bottom he's my baby bottom oh that's so cute i'm a middle [Laughter] anyway what anyway no but anywho i did i did i i saw something i read something about something about how like because i had a lot of yelling in my childhood and they're like yelling is actually abusive just even if you're not yelling at the person just yelling is like surprising shocking and abusive around people so once i heard that that was a wake-up call for me and i had a boyfriend that i scratched on his neck and i was like i'm done like i have to like nah i have to help myself because if i did that to him yeah if i have kids or whatever like it just wasn't like a safe thing so after that i really worked on my anger and you want to promote something why is bobby so mad i'm not mad it's not about him so he has to end it no that's a wow wow he got bored look at his stance look at how he's sitting he's like i once heard you'll like this story okay so my when when we used to flip phones i you know i used to drink and i had this flip phone and it was like duct taped together because it was so i dropped it so many times drunk and my best friend i would talk to her on the phone all the time and it kept happening where i would be talking to her and i would get mine out first like i'd call and i'd be like my story my story my story my story okay now it's your turn and the phone kept hanging up and i was like she was like you're a [ __ ] [ __ ] why do you keep doing that and i was like i'm not i'm not doing it on purpose and it would comically happen every time and then i realized what it was was because of the duct tape when it was her turn to talk i'd get bored and like loosen my hand i wasn't gripping it excited and it would have the thing battery would fall out i was like what's going on with you that's how you keep his attention so like if you need him to listen to something you've got to pepper in things that uh relate to him if you don't you've completely lost your audience i think that's why we're like we're animals look you start to fall asleep no i'm just thinking about it yeah so you have to pepper in things about himself right right no babe yeah i'm always no yep yes do you have a podcast i do have a podcast what's it called it's called me inspiration it's on youtube as the main it's okay so that's on everyone listening um youtube.com annie letterman she's so great please support her he's so upset he's gone into a mood and um her handles are annie leonard lehlerman we gotta get him we gotta get him ayahuasca stat and um when when the pendant was pandemic's over please check her out her stand up she's so funny on stage and she's like um a star rising she really is thanks i'm gonna be in the fourth episode of the documentary which is coming out on this sunday are the comedy on showtime oh they did it i saw you in the trailer yeah he put me on a lot of things have you seen the documentary so far am i in it i think you are i think thank you but i don't know i don't think i am i watched it months ago i don't know yeah yeah i watch it but i do believe you are in it i think i'm in it too because people have said it well you just wanted to hear it again yeah he did no because i don't know what i i'm so paranoid about it that i don't know what what section i'm in or what episode or what i say or they kept in i don't i hate to point this out you got very animated and excited when you started talking about yourself he woke up he woke up i've had enough i've had enough of it good i love you yeah yeah i love it you have a runner with annie letterman follow me on instagram it's letterman l-e-d-e-r-m-a-n gatorman you can buy my mask support my rent and um my patreon all my name youtube you do my podcast oh will you do my podcast sometimes yeah anytime hey everyone uh that was our episode i hope you enjoyed it a lot of fun um i just want to thank our sponsors for making this show possible sheath freshly better help and tushy try out sheath for yourself at no risk the first pair of underwear has a hundred percent money back guarantee s-h-e-a-t-h underwear.com and promo code tiger saves not one percent but 20 join almost 1.5 million people satisfied customers and skip the shopping prepping cooking and clean up freshly is offering our listeners 40 off their first two orders at freshly.com tiger belly take charge your mental health today and get 10 off your first month at betterhelp.com belly if you have a butthole like me george bob and kalila treat it right with the modern bidet go to hellotushy.com tag your belly to get ten percent off and a fresh clean butthole get your question on tiger belly by emailing us in advice on helpful gmail.com we're looking for something out of the ordinary strange co-workers weird family members alien counters you can email us advice unhelpful gmail.com once again guys you can follow kalalaclambdk bobbya bobbily live georgia george underscore kimmel myself at gilbert so we love you so much follow tiger blade on instagram at tiger belly [Music] foreign i don't know

Channel: TigerBelly

Views: 225,152

Rating: 4.7970963 out of 5

Keywords: tiger belly, tigerbelly, bobby lee, podcast, khalyla, tgrbly, all things comedy, mad tv, stand up, tpw, tkats, tfatk, off the record, bad friends, comedy podcast, Bobby lee andrew santino, annie lederman, joe rogan, whitney cummings, esther povitsky, comedy, joey diaz, laugh factory, comedy central, ymh, chelsea lately, chelsea handler, stand up comedy, joe rogan experience, comedy store, theo von, good for you podcast, tigerbelly clips, h3 podcast, theo von podcast

Id: GP9RXAqQT7s

Length: 81min 29sec (4889 seconds)

Published: Thu Oct 22 2020

Reddit Comments

[u/FiLthy_FranK21]

I loved her, reminds me of Scarlett Johansson mixed with Donna from 70s show

[u/Spongekelp]

I love Annie

[u/usedfleshlight22]

I didn't think it was bad but hey, to each their own

[u/moneenerd]

Another banger. These have been good since they stopped all that zoom shit. Annie seems legit funny.

[u/WickedMo13]

Why are they still running with the fucking Bobby isn't a pedo narrative at the end?? He makes up all of his stories, especially the one on O & A etc etc

Completely derailed the whole fucking podcast, literally at the very end lol....smh

The ending was so ehhh

She was great btw, wish she was on more but that ending made me feel like it was goodbye enemy #1 lol

[u/mademanmusic]

I remember Bobby saying he was mad at a comic, but he'd only say that she was blonde & had just got passed at the Store. I wondering if it was Annie, because it seems like he never mentions her name. And ya, I think I was right!

[u/miscpostman]

Man the vibe is off with the whole crew this episode. There's trouble in the kingdom.

[u/WasCrackinBruda]

Another boring TB episode. Damn :(

[u/jetuas]

I watched it, but only parts of it. Really felt stale tbh, and I think coming from Bobby. Annie's got them zingers tho!