Is it so wrong to want a little buddy
to hang out with you all the time? The animal sidekicks in Disney Movies are the best part! I don't know. I feel like I'd want my alone time, and I wouldn't know how to ask them to... (whispering) to leave. (whispering) Why did you whisper? Well, you guys are like my sidekicks, and that's working out great. - Sidekick?
- Sorry I'm late you guys. I had to finish making an apology statue. This is for you. And again, I am very sorry
that I insulted the tater tots here. I don't forgive you. [Sighs] - I was sure that would work.
- Why? Prince Eric had a giant apology statue. Ah, no, he got a birthday statue. And he hated it because a big giant statue of himself wasn't the birthday present he wanted. It's uh... It's uh, it's, it's really something. [Growling] I thought him not liking it made him humble. Mm-mm. Someone makes you a giant
statue of yourself, you say "thank you", and take it. You don't act like a spoiled brat. He's still the best Disney Prince, though. [All] What?! [Bombastic Classical Music] Yeah, I thought that was like common knowledge. Ask anyone, ask those guys. Don't ask those guys. Prince Eric is really nice, he treats her well, he takes her on carriage rides, his kingdom is pretty happy. And, before Ursula put that curse on him, that made him get distracted
by singing, he was pretty great. He was only attracted to her body. He saw her naked on the beach and was like "Ooh, come on naked lady. Come on back, I'll take you home. That'll be chill." He didn't make any real effort to find out if
she had any other means of communication. I mean, we know she can write, but did he consider any other
means of communication with her? No. Probably because he didn't give
a [BEEP] about what she had to say. To be fair, what was he supposed
to do, just leave her there? Yeah, i've never been in that situation, so I don't... know. I do agree with Yazmin, he is not a good prince. I mean, at their wedding he made
her eat her ocean fish friends. ♪ First I cut off their heads ♪ Then I pull out the bones Uh, in fact, he kept doing that through the whole entire movie. Having lived on a boat, I never ate my fish friends. I only ate my fish enemies. Um... y-yeah. And, she saved his life and he
didn't recognize her face, okay? I mean, it wasn't even that long
ago, dude. What the hell, Eric? Her face was like right in your face! Yeah, and, and he's super easily manipulated. He just bounces over to that
brunette who's singing all the God damned time, which makes her insufferable. And then he's like, "Oh, I, I love you. Let's fall in love and get married now." Like... Fine! Sorry. I thought it was accepted that Eric was the best Prince. I didn't realize I was behind on the ruling for most [BEEP]able cartoon royal boy. Okay, you wanna talk best prince? I did. Aladdin, baby! Okay, he takes her around the world, he
uses a bunch of genie wishes on her, and he is so charming! ♪ One jump, ahead of the breadline ♪ One swing ahead of the sword ♪ I steal only what I can't afford Ah, yes, his charming song about stealing. Not so charming once you think about it. Well then... I choose not to think about it. He wasn't charming at all, he was gas-lighting everyone. He magics his way into becoming a prince, when he could've just said "hey,
I'm that guy who you bonded with when I pretended that you were
my sister so your hand didn't get cut off. You uh, know this girl? Sadly, yes. She is my sister. Remember that? You liked it. Yeah, why didn't Jasmine recognize him either? I mean, it's not like his giant prince outfit changed his face or his voice or whatnot. How could people have such poor facial recognition in Disney Movies? I never thought about it like that. He uses his first wish to try to
force her to fall in love with him. There's this girl... Ehh! Wrong! he just met her, he has no intention
of getting to know her, but he wants to mind control her? Yeah, he totally would have, too, but Genie was like "I can't grant that wish." N-no, no. Yazmin, he was so charming though. ♪ One jump ahead of the breadline, one- He's just using an entire population to become a political figure just so
he can hook up with Jasmine. She doesn't even want to marry a prince! She wants to get married on her own terms. For love. Like Beast. He's all about love. The... Beast who kidnapped Belle and locker her up in tower so she would fall in love with him? And he was known as a terrible leader even before he got turned into a beast. I mean, it's not like he was taking
ruling classes during his beast period. [Chuckling] The Beast period. What is he need, like a Beast Midol? For his BMS? [Laughing] It's his Beast Menstrual Syndrome. Does the "P" in PMS stand for "person"? - No.
- And he blew up all the time. That dude was a live-wire. He was growling and slamming
his beast paws all the time. [Roaring] Why isn't she here yet?! That hurt! Get- I thought I told you to come down to dinner! [Objects Shattering] Do you realize what you could have done?! I'm not hungry. Go ahead and starve! Calm the [BEEP] down, Beast, I guess. But he did want love. Mm, he- he didn't want love, he needed love to turn back into a person. It was wanting love for selfish reasons. Fine. Beast would be a bad lover. Oh, don't say lover. Who are you, John Mayer? There's got to be a good prince. [Gibbering] What about, uh, uh... The prince from Cinderella, Prince Charming,
that was his name, right? You mean the guy who tried to find
a woman with her shoe? A shoe's not a fingerprint. That shoe probably fit many women. I mean, if you study her feet, they were very average. Why were you studying her feet
before this conversation? - I...
- Yeah, Prince Charming is bad. He was gonna marry the first chick who's shoe size was right. Which... - Cody?
- Like 6, 5 and a half, 6. And! He didn't recognize her face! Okay they spent the whole damn evening dancing together, just looking directly into each other's face! Even if they talked a lot, he just -poof!- forgot any information that she gave him or anything she said. She didn't even know that he's a prince, so he didn't introduce himself. His name is Prince Charming"? It's right there in the name. Get it together, guy. Yes, who names their kid Prince Charming? I mean, what if he grows up and
he is not charming at all? 'Cause then his joke of a name
is a reminder in every social situation that he is terrible and uncomfortable. Bet he wakes up every morning and
he looks in the mirror and he's like "You will never live up to your name." I love that so much. What about Naveen from "The Princess and the Frog"? No! He was just a spoiled brat who wanted to marry rich because his parents cut him off. He was snooty, and, and gross. Besides being unbelievably handsome, mkay, I also happen to come from a fabulously wealthy family. She had to solve all his problems because
she was under a random spell? But, i- in the end, he becomes really nice, and then Tiana and him fall in love, and- Yeah, but instead of ruling his kingdom, he and Tiana open a restaurant. Wait, so, are there no good princes? Li Shang from "Mulan"! He seems super chill. Oh, yeah! It took him a second, to come around to the fact that
his girlfriend was a badass, but he did. And he accepted her and loved her for her personality when she
was a dude and a girl. Ooh! And he pushed her
to better herself, and they were friends, and- He was a captain, not a prince. [Sighs] Prince John from "Robin Hood". [All Groan] Rob the poor to feed the rich. [Laughing] Kidding, he's the worst. Damn it! Princes suck. Wait a minute! Lions, Prince John! Simba! He was a motha-[BEEP]ing prince! And he was really nice. He didn't even eat other animals. O-okay, well, just bugs. He was like a pescetarian. In- in jungle terms. Slimy, yet satisfying. [Slurping] Ah! He was a genuinely nice guy. And! He recognized faces! Yeah, but he also abandoned
his kingdom to go live in the jungle and forget all his worries. And... his cares. He is a teenager! Let him live (mockingly) Let him live. When push come to shove, he came back to the kingdom
and did what he needed to do. well wouldn't he be hooking up
with a ton of other lionesses? - Mm-mm.
- Mm-mm! That's an assumption. From what we saw, he only had eyes for Nala. - Mm-hmm!
- So a lion... is the best Disney Prince? If my options are Eric, guy who doesn't want his woman to talk, Charming, guy who doesn't remember women's faces, Aladdin, guy who gaslights you and doesn't have nipples? And Beast? Guy who kidnaps you and forces you to fall in love? Yeah, sign me up for the lion. Yeah, I'll go with the lion. Me, too. All right, me too. Are these still frozen? Which I love! Yum! Mm! Frozen! Yummy! ♪ Let it go Like "Frozen". ♪ Let it go [Laughing] You know, okay, so it is thematically relevant to a thing we are talking about. But you were not here for that, so I do not know why I am bringing it up. Um, maybe, maybe I just wanted to do a little song for you. You see that? She accepts my apology! Mmm... She's on her way to accepting your apology. What? No! You do not take, you do not take an apology statue if you do not mean it. Sometimes you take an
apology statue without meaning it. Well she took it!, so I win! [Cody] How much time did you spend on that thing? [Carmen] It had bangs, I could see the bangs. [Kimia] Yeah, I used the fusilli for her hair, and then I used some elbow macaroni's for her body. [Cody] What did you use for her feet? [Carmen] Cody. Hey everybody, thanks for watching
that brand new episode of "After Hours". First, click the "C" to subscribe, and click other stuff for other things to happen. We're gonna be doing another episode of "After Hours" every month so that you get two. Don't be mad if it's new and different, it's also new and more! - Yay!
- Yay.
While the original After Hours crew from Cracked still holds a special place in my heart, I was also a fan of the group that started rotating in before everything fell apart.
So, I have a toddler and have watched these all recently... not great research on these. Prince Eric clearly said he was in love with Ariel's voice, not body. in Cinderella, it was the King who wanted his son, the prince, to wed whomever fit the shoe as he wanted the prince married off and saw that statement as a loophole. It wasn't that he didn't recognize her as he didn't see any of the potential candidates until the shoe fit cinderella.