When Did You Realize Your "Friends" Don't Like You Too Much?

creditors who didn't know they were in the outer circle of a friend group what was eurocrap they don't really like me that much moment got pretty sick and was in the hospital for a week not one of my friends in a small group of supposedly close friends reached out to see if i was getting better they never visited didn't even so much as get a text from them we hung out almost daily for the past two years and they knew i was in the hospital when i finally got better i decided it was time to get some new friends this happened to me one single person came to visit me in that week not the person i had been seeing for a month not my roommate none of my friends only my manager from work the job that didn't fire me for missing shifts while hospitalized those three months recovering gave me a lot of time to think about my relationships thank god i was sitting at the lunch table with them and they were talking it then dawned on me that they never talked to me during lunch or reached out to me during break i was basically following them around like a stupid lost puppy all the time while they couldn't care less back in high school i thought i was best friends with a girl on my sports team for three four years through thick and thin i've been there for her i supported her through de vere depression bullying abusive home life multiple suicide attempts giving her my clothes when her dad periodically burned hers bringing her food from my house splitting my bust tokens so she didn't have to walk home from practice late evenings you have to qualify for them letting her wash her clothes and bathe at my house so she didn't get ridiculed stuck up for her during a time in a minute long story short senior year between classes when i asked her where did she want my mom to take her out to eat for her birthday this year my mom was doing this the past few years she told me she was going to out with a and b this year because i only want to hang out with friends but i'll see you on monday i didn't even know what to say instead blankly at her then went to class then practice i felt hurt and was so salty that mcdonald's could have used me for their french fries for a long time after that i haven't spoken to her since you had transcended from a friend into a sibling went to a sleepover when i was about 12 13 yo it was for my best friend's birthday they said let's sit in a circle and list our favorite things about each other sounded wholesome so i sat in the circle when my turn came around everyone in the circle had nothing positive to say about me but wiped you're actually really annoying and we don't like you my best friend looked sad for me but didn't say anything dang kids are mean clearly it was envy caused by their poor anal hygiene been at my job almost a year noticed on snapchat everyone was together for some drinks managers staff who started decades ago staff who started weeks ago everyone except one other person i texted her out of curiosity about it and she responded with you they asked me but i couldn't go i tried to laugh it off but man did that hurt i always thought i had a good rapport with my co-workers but i wonder now am i just being tolerated by them they all told me they had cancelled their plans to go to a lake over the weekend i found out they actually went and had replaced me with someone else through their snap stories it's always a bad sign when they posted on their snap stories but seriously that's like one of the worst dong moves a person can pull i became friends with a group of women my own age mid-20s through a mutual friend we all shared and i thought we were getting along really well we would meet up at least once a week and do dinner and movies at one of our homes i was invited to weddings hosted baby showers we all belong to the same social media group and chatted constantly then gradually i started noticing i was no longer being invited to things i would show up at an event and be totally out of the loop as far as major life changes were concerned and no one would bother telling me anything or filling me in i then found out through that mutual friend that the group had gotten tired of me and instead of saying anything they had created a new social media group without me and were just waiting for me to take the hint and leave them alone so i did i stopped trying to stay connected and just let the four years of friendship die i saw them all at that mutual friend's wedding recently and tried to have a casual conversation catch up and everything but not a single one of them even looked at me or said a word to me i felt really stupid and confused as i stood in a group with them but was completely ignored i eventually wandered off when the girl who i thought was my closest friend sent me a text message at 10 pm out of the blue telling me to move out because she thought i didn't fit in and made her and her friends uncomfortable best part we were in a foreign country so without her and the group i was completely alone i later found out that the girl had a terrible reputation in her hometown and a bunch of people hated her so it actually wasn't me you get the news last of what happened with the group members and you don't get an invitation from them they only invite you when you invite yourself through them meaning that when they discuss the plans and you happen to be there so they must invite you but i was always like that this above was just a summary of what i experienced i've never had that kind of friend group that actually cared about me so i never had an oh crap moment had a tangential friend group they were fine people and i was new to the city bought a boat and all of a sudden we're best friends the immediate rise to central friend made me step back and go your number so when i took notice of when i wasn't invited to normal day-to-day stuff in the group like concerts and dinners versus when the thursday flurry of texts came in about the weekend on the boat i distanced myself can't relate to boat but absolutely to people wanting to take and take and never giving back when i would show up to public places like my apartment pool or nearby bars and see my friends they would be hardly excited and feign interest in what jay was up to at the time oh and they'd act like i was invited but showed up late not the case and it hurt i'm so sorry for you i don't have anything meaningful to say but i saw nobody else had commented a reply and every entry in this thread deserves recognition i truly hope you have found a new group of friends i spend my free time over a fall and winter helping a friend restore a fishing boat 25-ish mako sanding old rough fiberglass this is agonizing work by the way you have to have all of your skin covered goggles respirator gloves or the fibers and in your skin putting down new fiberglass sanding that smooth priming painting gel coating lacing a new canvas onto the t-top guess who didn't get invited on the first trip yup we don't speak anymore that's when you present them with an invoice for your time and labor if they happily accept your hard work and don't repay you with something as simple as the first trip on the water you're no better than a contractor in their eyes i didn't get the little going away party at work it's a silly thing but it was a close friendly workplace and when people would quit they'd set up cheap little theme decorations from the office printer and add some other funny stuff about the person that was leaving i brought a cake and it was fine and i know my co-workers didn't dislike me but i guess everyone sort of forgot about me because i'm not the most expressive person i was sad i never got my themed decorations i worked there for two years i had the same experience two years working there everyone who left got a little farewell party we'd drink wine and they'd receive a small gift from the boss when i left nothing when my back then but not anymore friend left and i came to her farewell party there was sparking wine food and the boss didn't shut up about how she'll be missed that put things into perspective my husband has long time friends and they all work for the same company and are often out of town the wives girlfriends have gotten to know each other and for a while had regular girls nights the woman who planned them worked at the same place as i do and would ask what i was up to each weekend as we did stuff at work girls nights were always planned after i had confirmed that i would be out of town taking care of my grandmother i don't know if it was truly on purpose or not but it felt like it was what a sea colon they told me about the parties they throw every summer and on the day of my birthday which they know they held one and didn't invite me during my senior year of high school i was on a field trip to new york city i was under the impression that i was on friendly terms with pretty much everyone on the trip on the second night however i was looking for a group with whom i could get dinner most of the people had already made plans or were working on assignments related to the trip i asked one of the guys i was rooming with who i thought was a friend if i could tag along with him and whoever he was eating with who it turned out where two girls from our class he said he'd have to ask them if it was okay and he left these girls were very pretty and popular but were also genuinely nice so i figured they'd be fine with me coming along and my roommate would come back and get me of course he never did i waited for a while and then decided to just go get a couple slices of pizza when he came back i asked what happened and he said he asked and they said heck to the freaking no i asked why not and he said to put it very mildly they are not your biggest fans i asked why what had i ever done to them to make them dislike me you're not a person that people can like you're an acquired taste the best anyone can ever feel for your is pity and then the first guy said yeah some people can learn to appreciate you you're a nice guy and all but i'm going to advise you to just keep to yourself this trip nobody wanted you here i'm not trying to be a jerk it's for your own good i couldn't figure out what i had done in fact i had kept to myself for most of the trip to begin with and i was just tired of being alone all the time they told me it wasn't my fault but that i was just incapable of not being annoying that sucked because i know they were right when i invite them all to my birthday and nobody arrived turns out they got together elsewhere that same day and just decided as a group not to show up people i've only known for a few months said happy birthday the people i've known for 10 plus years haven't this is the second year they've done this same thing happened to me this year my friend circle was really good we would all stick together and have each other's back one jealous guy in our group turned a couple of guys against each other because of a mediocre issue the people found out discussed amongst themselves that we needed to let him go however my friends didn't let me know about this whole issue for like a month and since i didn't know i kept talking to that joke i later found out that they had an altogether different whatsapp group and everyone was in it except me i did some serious self analysis and found i was not at in fault whatsoever then later on i found out that kept me away since i had some academic issues they thought i was dumb and hence were singling me out i even requested them to add me to the group but they ignored i later got into depression and had some serious mental health issues no one talked with me as if i never existed i've moved way too ahead in my life i'm now fortunate to have really good friends who care about me and i care about them as well knocking on wood i am thankful to god for having them in my life also thank you very much to the whole riddit community so many positive people here god bless you all does it count if you want to go meet up with your friend but he is with his roommate's friends and warns you and then that we may not get along only to get there meet them get along great and have a great night and then his roommates friends saying to you that they didn't like your friend very much that was a fun night actually i mean it kind of counts well dang reading all these comments has made me realize that all the friends i had in middle and high school weren't really my friends glad i don't talk to a single one anymore however i am currently friendless lol lol to me it was the opposite it's the college and work friends that i never really talk to anymore but my middle and high school ones are the one that i keep in contact with and we still meet up whenever our schedules permit it thought everyone on my soccer team were good friends then i found out about the grupture that i wasn't part of next one of my teammates didn't know who i was when i joined her liver stream i eventually took three months off because of a knee problem and when i showed back up nobody cared nobody asked why i was gone nothing just a few oh hey you're back i guess it doesn't help that i played keeper kind of the outcast position luckily i quit soccer so no more of that i don't understand how the keeper is an outcast position in soccer but the goalie in hockey is one of if not the most loved players on the team when email was starting to become a thing my classmates and i were having lunch and a bunch of them were excitedly exchanging emails when i asked one of them to give me hers she said why do you need it we see each other every day she gave it to everyone else crap hurt that really sucks man [Music] go i hate this crap all right so i think this has been me throughout most of my life this is solely based on a trend that i noticed a few years back i'm the initiator of every conversation i've had with my past friends were i not to message them i'd never speak to them again and that's exactly what started to happen friends i've had for years gone because i never started up another conversation looking back i'd be in the middle of a story and then get interrupted only to have the group go off on that tangent while i sat by quietly listening that has developed into me speaking in a very quick manner most the time which means my thoughts get jumbled and now i don't make any sense only when i'm typing am i pretty well managed i've managed to make some relatively new friends in the military where we all check up on each other i know that out of everyone i met three would actually still talk with me two initiators the third is really socially awkward to start something but a better friend nonetheless i'm grateful for the few in my life that care but i'm always weary of them leaving i'm glad to hear you found people to interact with as friends and trust me if they're that good of friends to you then i doubt they'd leave anytime soon you won't friend group had a group chat called the crew which was made in between sophomore and junior year of high school it was used somewhat regularly for a while up until the middle of senior year i noticed that it straight up wasn't being used anymore while i was around some of them one day i noticed them having the crew notifications pop up on their phone and finally i asked my best friend like one of the three people in that group i'm still friends with today if they made a new group chat and he said yeah it was basically the old one minus me and plus like 10 more people it sucked but whatever frick and colin i asked my best friend like one of the three people in that group i'm still friends with today if they made a new group chat and he said yeah you need a new best friend a true bff would never be a part of something like that i broke up with another person in the group ishmaeli he started dating another friend and i was never invited to anything after that so they only hung with me bc i was dating him that often happens in a breakup if you end up with no separate friend circle during a relationship a friend of mine did this she ignored us entirely when she was with her bf then they broke up and suddenly she wants to be in our circle again because his circle throws her out you know she isn't welcome i got dvt in my right leg at 19 and had to be in the hospital for a bit to bust the clots i had blood clots in my leg for about two weeks before i ever got it treated i didn't know i had them and it's unlikely for 19 year old to have them i later learned i had a congenital heart affect and that's why i got them so young only a couple out of the large group of people i talked to and associated with even talked to me and asked if i was okay i've been riding it so ever since which has been mainly due to the traumatic depression i got from it on a bright note though i at least know who's actually there for me and have gotten closer to those people i found messages of them talking crap about me everything i said did tried to do as just a dang joke wasn't even looking for the messages had to borrow a computer they were synced onto that hurt we supposedly talked it out which turned into them detailing about how it was all my fault and i forced them to act that way no apology nothing can't cut them out as they're my spouse's sibling but yeah still haven't gotten over it they all went to an amusement park out of town on a weekend without telling me when i found out they said it was because they didn't want me to be all mopey and depressed all weekend we were in different classes so every day at lunch time i would wait for them outside their classroom but they were all in the same class together not one time did they acknowledge me as soon as the bell rang they'd just leave from the other door and walk straight down the stairs i used to approach them until i realized they didn't care at all didn't even get a single glance that's when you pack up their stuff and remove them from your life when they took all the proceeds from the project we had worked on together and to which i had contributed a great deal of labor then went to disney world for a week without me our pro revenge my friend we are waiting lol in high school near the end of senior year i was crying because i thought i was gonna fail and when i went to my friend at lunch i was told by the one i thought i was closest to if you're gonna keep crying could you do it somewhere else you're killing our fun vibe here it never asked me what was wrong nothing only two people stood up for me when you hear more and more stories about what they've done together and you find yourself saying out loud something along the lines of that must have been fun first few times you don't think much of it eventually it clicks maybe get a pity invite somewhere down the line and while excited you still feel like you're the oddball there because you're wondering where did this come from ends up being like an obligation sort of thing because these other people have known you for a while and then you're done probably didn't help that you might have tried too hard in some spots on that one excursion but you feel like there's all that pressure i suggested a group vacation to the beach split a rental for a week lots of fun they booked it and didn't invite me burned a little high school ended i got one email and then they stopped even the ones who stayed in the area completely stopped sending me texts or email and no one responded to mine these were guys i spent every lunch and often after school for up to four years with yeah bye that's part of why i decided to move away from my hometown this experience is similar but not totally the same as the prompt i had two very close work friends we had connected by all going to dragonkin in atlanta georgia the year before one of those friends found another group of friends at work and split his time between our group and his last year my father had a stroke he survived i was going to have lunch with my two work friends that evening but i texted them in the group chat the situation and i couldn't make it one friend immediately called me and offered help and tried to console me the other friend the one with the other friend group never responded to the text to this day a year later we still see each other at work and he never has asked about my father i dropped him not long after that he was acting strange aloof and never hung out before that incident i also found out later from someone who used to be in his other friend group he'd been talking crap about me for some time the group of people i often hung out with decided to have a sleepover movie night i was not invited because they forgot to tell me next day at school they told me it was actually for the better because they all got drunk and i was known for never drinking that was about eight nine years ago and i never felt like part of a friend group since then when they all were planning a trip to the mall and i asked if i could come my mom would have driven me so a ride wasn't the issue and they said they only wanted three people going also when they chose to speak in a language i didn't understand for a whole lunch period just so i didn't know what they were talking about they did it a few times and i just started bringing a book to lunch i was the definition of in the outer circle in high school everyone thought i was super popular because i casually knew everyone but no one ever really made an effort to spend time with me outside of specific school related occasions everyone wanted to be in my group during projects or chat with me in class but when it came time for parties or even lunch or whatever very few people seem to include me in any plans even plans made in front of me i finally found a fairly close knit group the fairly stereotypical small group of gay kids and i really started to feel like i found my people until i found out i was in none of the group chats and not invited to any plans with everyone the real kicker for me was that my girlfriend at the time was the kind of leader almost of the group she would send me snapchats and texts and videos about all of the fun things they all were doing but never bothered to invite me one of my so-called friends even disliked our relationship because he said we were like harry ron and hermione which i thought was hilarious for two reasons one i was never included in any group hangout and two ron and hermione get together in harry potter tl dr in high school even my gf didn't bother to include me when my supposed best friends all hung out and that's how i knew none of them were my actual friends p.s i've only been out of high school for a few years and i now have a great group of friends who actively seek out my company and i'm planning on getting engaged soon to a wonderful girl and all of them are nothing like the friends i thought i had in high school so anyone who is still in that stage of not really knowing who your real friends are it gets a lot easier once you stop seeing people every day you get new friends eventually and they make you wonder how you ever thought you were close to your old friends i found this out at the start of the year when i was hospitalized i had remained very good friends with my ex we fell out of love and remained close it was one of those friendships that became brother sister type close but not in love she urged me to continue to be close to her and as we had no beef and it was all amicable it was an easy decision at the time we had also moved here from two states away and had created the same friendship circle anyways when i was in hospital my girlfriend contacted her to let her know that i'd had emergency life-saving surgery that was the thing to do they were cool with one another the response that she got was that she was sorry to hear that and to wish me all the best i got a single text message throughout my hospital stay and she didn't contact me for a couple of weeks after that even though i reached out decided that my partner was my future and to leave the ex in the past gave up on most in that circle of friends one of the best decisions that i have made post hospital good luck with the girlfriend do us proud if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now

Channel: On Tap Studios

Views: 23,842

Rating: 4.8385239 out of 5

Keywords: friends dont like me, friends dont like, friends dont like you, friends dont like me anymore, friends, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, sub, reddit cringe, memes, comment awards, dankify, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, chill, story, stories, reddit on tap, reddit stories 2021

Id: QL6rgnIKa9M

Length: 25min 27sec (1527 seconds)

Published: Sat Jun 05 2021