What's The Most Passive Agressive Thing You've Ever Done? (r/AskReddit)

I just hit the passive-aggressive zennith played a YouTube video of someone eating crisps loudly while someone else ate crisps loudly because I can't be bothered to ask them to stop what depths have you sunk to I was on the receiving end of some epic passive aggression once I was in the twelve items or less line at the grocery store and as usual had counted my items before I got in the line an older couple got in line behind me and clearly did not think I had done so they spoke loudly to each other I guess hoping to embarrass me that doesn't look like twelve items to you does IT Marge etcetera this continued on and when it was my turn one started let's count one two three I started wondering if maybe I miscounted feeling a little panicky as I usually try not to be a douche bag then finally ten Oh the cashier laughed I needed to do nothing the back firing of their plan was plenty I would have grabbed three packs of gum and put them on the belt with my stuff just to Frick with him after that little act I used to be a resident advisor in a college dorm one of the dorm activities was on personal hygiene with free stuff available like deodorant shampoo razors etc one of my residents couldn't be bothered to speak with his roommates about his disgusting habits but he sure took about a dozen of those flyers and put them up all over his roommates side of the room I bought my little bro a college how-to guide called other people can smell you my second job was in a cube farm in the IT department of a large telecom company one of the guys used to check his voicemail with his speaker phone with a volume set just slightly below maximum my solution I made eye contact with my coworkers and one by one we all dialed in to our voicemail boxes on speakerphone with a volume set to maximum in under a minute the air was filled with robotic recorded prompts for passwords and airing voicemails for all to hear dude got the message you should have called when he wasn't at work and left a message that said stop listening to your voicemail on speakerphone it's inconsiderate and the entire office here you then let him play the message one morning the neighbor in my girlfriend's apartment will let their goddamn alarm go off for a good five minutes before they even try to stop it they don't hit snooze like a normal person they just lay there and let it buzz over and over and over again it was going on longer than usual so I ended up pulling out my phone and turning on the meltdown alarm and basically pressing it directly into the wall on top of the horrendously loud noise it was also buzzing the whole wall they turned their alarm off within 10 seconds and haven't done it since if this ever happens again get a screaming meanie alarm from any truck stop or online its 110 decibels of get the Frick out of bed treated like a grenade set in for 1 minute it's a timer and toss it in their window it's brought people to tears because they couldn't turn it off my old roommates friend used to always come over and drink my cans of Pepsi I'm on a pretty tight budget it like to treat myself with said cans so you can imagine how upset US made me one day I had all the cans but one which I coated with nail biter the second he realized something was wrong he poured himself a glass of water using the only glass of the drying rack the glass coated in nail biter this is a new level of PA evil and I love you for it I live on a type ischl American suburbs treat my neighbor just got a new job with a company provided vehicle he has a one lane driveway so he parks this huge work van in the road directly in front of my house it is all I can see when look out the front window I casually mention it to him how he could park in front of his house and not mine he just chuckles to himself and starts talking about something else for the next week I parked my car in front of his house to see if he enjoyed looking at my car every day luckily he got the message and now parks in front of his home and not mine I hate anyone who drives himself truck with those bright as 30 freaking Suns headlights they are the most obnoxious goddamn thing in the world I was driving home one day from class when this guy came behind me his headlights destroying my eyes I was so mad not only did he have the obnoxious lights but he was tailgating me hardcore now I'm doing 15 over the speed limit and I'm not in the fast lane he could pass me but no he just continues to tailgate me there wasn't even another soul on the highway now this is in New Jersey on highways the state police don't just sit in their cars and keep their radar guns on they only turned them on when they think they see someone speeding so that radar detectors can't spot em from miles away well I spot one sitting in the grassy middle part of the highway facing my direction so I proceed to turn on my signal go in the fast lane I get on my brakes hard he slingshots past me and gives me this perplexed look all of a sudden my radar detector goes crazy the cop pulls out and pulls over the butt hole trick you truck maybe it isn't passive-aggressive but it felt great I was at Costco once and they had massage chairs at the end of the aisle right by the crunches and folding wheelchairs etcetera two older women were complaining about me using it making remarks about how I was abusing the equipment or some crap so I struggled to get off the chair gave a look of pain and wheeled off in one of the wheelchairs I kept one of my hands shaking and went right past them their faces were one of the best things ever five blow kisses to angry drivers I am a guy on an airplane flight this past summer the guy in front of me reclined his seat until he was practically resting his head on my chest try politely asked him if he would please put his seat up he just looked at me and said number I then turned my air vent on full blast and aimed it right at his face when he reached up to adjust it I pushed his hand away excuse me that's my event I like it that way he ended up leaning forward the entire flight but left his seat back reclined practically to my chest we were both uncomfortable for the entire flight but neither of us would give him as my wife put it so this is what happens when an inconsiderate butthole meets a passive-aggressive dong strikes me more as aggressive aggressive there's these two girls who sit behind me in one of my classes that don't shut up no matter what my professor says they always have to talk about it between the two of them after doing this it always leads into a longer discussion between them it's freaking annoying because I'm actually interested in what my professor has to say he tells some pretty interesting stories one day I had enough for it when they started talking again I took my laptop out and made a new Word document I made the font large enough to where they would be able to read it and typed four simple words shut the Frick up I cleared my throat very loudly I should add and just slightly moved out of the way to where they would be able to read it that was two weeks ago and they haven't said a word in class since I had the same problem in my philosophy class for about a week I would type everything that they said at the end of the week I handed them each a transcript of their conversations in college I had the worst for a night she would stay up all night sleep all day long and dramatic Elyse I'll grow NIF I accidentally woke her up by you know being in my room during the day she also could not shut up for five minutes at a time she literally wandered around our room muttering to herself mostly frickin Jesus Christ and if she wasn't doing that she was sighing and groaning and slamming drawers shut she also left food that should have been refrigerated out on her desk for weeks at a time including stacks of burgers still in there paper wrapping it smelled anyway she mentioned once how she hated living in the dorms because she couldn't smoke in there I casually brought up how my last roommate broke her contract and moved into a house mid semester and she just loved it new roommate got excited and started to look into getting an apartment what I didn't mention was that it cost $1000 plus that months-long feet a break said contract and apparently she managed to sign up for this without noticing that fine print either because for about a week after she had screaming matches on the phone with her mom about the money a week later she was gone and I the room to myself for the rest of the semester it was great I would feel bad but living with @array TT's ridden burger hoarder was too much for me mine is a painful memory to relive but I'll do it for the sake of this thread me and my then university roommate shared this tiny room with one double-decker bed a cupboard two tables and a mirror the mirror is depressingly important in this story it was opposite the bed so that I sleeping on the top bunk could actually see what my roommate was doing under you know where this is going so one day I woke up to this horrible squelching sound in my mind I knew what it was I just didn't want to entertain the idea it must not be that it cannot be furtively I glanced at the mirror knowing that the reflection would take a little bit of my soul sure enough it was my room mate and on my bunk furiously masturbating in his boxers I have never seen anyone jerk off that feverishly it was almost beautiful in some sick perverse way ok so the problem was that he kept doing this I kept waking up to the sound of a guy who watches Matrix Reloaded daily frantically jerking off in his boxers even worse sometimes he'd let out a nun sound that chills me to this very day I cannot watch Japanese be because of him I didn't know what to do should I accept my fate and consider his morning wank as some kind of cruel alarm clock one fateful day I was woken up to the usual squelching sound and I decided that I had to do something about it I just cleared my throat he immediately stopped and it was then that he knew I knew we never spoke again and he moved the following semester you sucker I know you on read it if you're reading this I'm gonna [ __ ] jerk off in front of you one day drunk bastard should have started moaning harder than him if the other person feels even more awkward than you do you win final life sound tech my job success rate depends on me being passive aggressive oh you turned up your guitar amp again cool I hope you like me cranking the crap out of your guitar in your monitors now does this count drunk bottles being loud outside residents building at some ungodly hour on a Sunday night hey do you guys have a watch a watch yeah I need to know what time it is at 3:30 oh cool so now that you know it's 3:30 can you shut the Frick up I have a friend who talks about his gap year in Peru every chance possible now when he starts up with another Peru story I put on my most amazed look and say I never knew you went to Peru whenever some butt hole is tailgating me on the road I hit the windshield cleaner button and just hold it usually I can get a good consistent spray of water to obstruct their view they usually change lanes after that bonus points for me if their windshield is dirty and their wipers are bad leaving behind the dirty muddy mess also if you are all in on this idea you can take a pin and adjust the angle of one of your nozzles to spray directly over your car for maximum effectiveness I had a wagon and Nevada rear wheel sprayer so I pulled it out and found the best angle to hit tailgaters right in the window it was awesome people would either get super mad and go into a rage almost the time start laughing and back off I put three staples in my stapler at a time so people will stop using the one on my desk there is an empty desk right next to me with a fully loaded stapler no one ever uses I realized this is ridiculous I was in Walmart once and this kid was screaming I tried to ignore it I thought about asking the parent acquired the kid down you could hear him through the whole store finally I just stood at the end of the aisle they were on and started screaming back at him the mother was horrified but after about 10 seconds of yelling back and forth the kid finally stopped applying the old adage of fighting fire with fire also I bet that confused the heck out of that kid or else see though is that what I sound like the residents of the pool I workout complain about everything making the shifts at my co-workers and I work extremely trying on our patients it eventually got to the point where a number of residents petitioned to get one of the guards written up because she was sucking a lot in an inappropriate manner while on stand as head guard of the facility all of these complaints went to me eventually I got sick of this and took action what the residents didn't realize up until about halfway through the summer is that the pool they use has a number of small rules that no one really acknowledges because honestly it's not worth anyone's time to enforce them these rules include things such as enforcing designated areas to eat and a sort of blanket ban on alcohol from the 25th of July on under my authority every guard was required to reprimand all residents on every single infraction in order to give them a taste of their own medicine I can honestly say that there is nothing more satisfying than having one of my guards stop a hated resident from enjoying a few drinks with whoever they're with and then looking them right in the eye and just absorbing their hated it's sublime dirt3 my girlfriend had a roommate that would hang out with us when we were if a house hanging out she would watch movies with us sometimes whenever something funny happened she would laugh and immediately repeat the line she laughed at this was annoying Balam in michigan so you aren't allowed to directly ask someone to stop doing something that's bothering you they get mad so I made it a drinking game and took a drink every time she did it I got drunk pretty quick and ended up breaking her DVD player komal I'm in Michigan so you aren't allowed to directly ask someone to stop doing something that's bothering you it's the same way in Wisconsin as Upper Midwest owners are just too nice we're like Canadians only fatter when I was pretty young maybe 13 ish my younger brother 11-ish kept frustrating me by stealing my CD player and I was out for clever revenge we had a CD recorded by a band from the local church called flying sheep something-something Jesus and flying animals you know the drill the first track on the CD was about 45 seconds of sheep noises when he went to sleep I snuck into his room quietly located my CD player set it to loop track 1 and turned the volume way down about every five minutes I'd sneak and a game and turned the volume up a little more I did this for about hours until there was nothing but bleating sheep at full volume about four feet from his head my brother slept like a log so he slept for a whole seven more hours with sheep noises beamed directly into his brain he woke up pretty angry apparently he had dreamt about trying to herd aggressive sheep all night long sweet revenge that's funny bro because all I dreamt of was justice if someone is really annoying me with what they are saying chewing loudly smacking gum loudly making annoying drum noises with their mouths I will sometimes turn music on and slowly turn it up to the point where I can't hear them over it sometimes I will even look them dead in the eyes while I do it better than my sighing tactic Bravo whenever my roommate shaves he always leave little bits of hair in and around the sink as other people's hair has always made me cringe I repeatedly asked him to start but there would always be hair in the sink so I waited for three months I grew my pubic hair to the most glorious length it has ever been and shaved it all off into the sink and left it I haven't had any problems with my bathroom since then for three months I grew my pubic hair to the most glorious length this is making me wonder if I should do some manscaping edit public hair my god how much one letter can change started doing heavy drugs so my wife would leave me man you really committed to it I was on a road trip with my grandparents and we were sharing a hotel room my grandfather has a really intense snore and I couldn't take it anymore so I'll lean forward and clapped as loud as I could and pretended to be asleep he immediately shot out of bed and walked around the room to investigate leaving me just enough time to fall asleep before the snoring returned I was at the Aquarium of the Pacific where they have a cool projection on a sphere while they were in the middle of their presentation this one lady kept taking pics of the projection with a flash so in this dark room filled with people every minute hour or so she would take a flash photo I eventually took a flash photo of her she glared at me with some evil eyes but she stopped with the flash photography my family and I enjoyed the rest of the presentation my roommates GF moved in even though we agreed she wouldn't if she did then she would have to pitch in for utilities they haven't so far he's messy slams doors at night etc but the one thing that bugs me to death is this they began holding their TP now I'm all for sharing and whatnot and I bought a 24 pack when we first moved in the two of us being male we go through maybe one roll every two three weeks now that she's moved in we've gone through the 24 pack in two months I went ahead and bought another six pack all gone I decided to stop buying TP in hopes they would start buying some last week we ran out of TP fine I'll buy a single roll from the gas station gone in three days fine I'll get another one gone in three days again finally in the morning I realized no more TP fine however I notice her going to the bathroom and I snickered thinking that she doesn't have any TP nope they bring their own TP to the bathroom TL DR wrong mates and wanted GF moved in with us used up all the toilet paper and is now holding her own taking her own roll from their room to the bathroom this would be fine but whenever I replace the roll she lose all of my nap note I haven't said anything because I'm moving out in December and really I don't care to confront over TP watching my daughter at gymnastics woman next to me smacking her gum like a cow I pulled out a pen and Satre clicking the button until she got fed up and left this last fourth of July some friends and I went down to the pier to watch the fireworks we were sitting down when this couple decided the perfect spot for them was standing directly in front of us I had been drinking a bit so it seemed like a good idea to bark like a dog not like a mean pit bull or something more like a high-pitched Chihuahua I do a really good impression by the way they kept turning around looking for the dog until they realized it was me I looked them in the eyes and started barking with an even higher pitch I think they thought I was crazy because they just whispered to each other and left the old man sitting next to me gave me a high-five freshman year of university randomly assigned run mate I had a lymph node infection I thought it was just a bad hangover and was bedridden for four days visibly very sick the sucker decides those four days other days to get Co D from a thrift store and invite his friends to our room to play from midnight to fall he'd always sleep from 5:00 a.m. 1 p.m. second day of him giving me the old spicy Co D Jane I would last opera from my speakers from 6:00 a.m. noon then I'd allow him around 10 minutes off snoozle time and start it again it's not much but I don't have the energy to fight with people who post about their strong moral political beliefs on Facebook what I do have is money and the ability to donate to Planned Parenthood in their names every time they post something that I disagree with it's the most passive-aggressive thing I do my friends live in a duplex the couple next to their Marg use like there's no tomorrow mostly the guy yelling they've left notes before but it never ends they change their Wi-Fi network name - we hear you beating your wife three weeks with no result and it's now we still hear you beating your wife I caught an international flight with two friends it was 24 hours long and the first time I had ever been overseas something happened with the ticket allocation and we were split up into two and our friend Charlie was two rows back I politely asked the lady sitting next to us if she would swap seats with Charlie and explained that we were traveling together and his seat was an aisle seat just like hers she said um number and promptly put her headphones in later in the flight she is trying to read and notices that her reading light is out she asks me if she can turn mine on so that she can read dirt seriously I say if you were sitting in Charlotte's seat your lights would work and no I don't need to read and I watched her read in the dark for a solid five hours I would have turned the lights on occasionally just to stop her eyes adjusting if someone's rude to me I cover their seat in water all over so there are no marks pulls to spot and watch as the realization slowly sets in I left a note for one of my old room mates to stop being so passive-aggressive I was sitting in class one day and this girl behind me was being really annoying smacking her gum talking texting which would have been okay except our desks were touching so every few seconds my desk would buzz so I started typing things in a really large font things like this girl behind me is really loud and snippets of her conversations she noticed and stopped I actually got the idea from reddit so thanks everybody I recall that too the typing of I think Ashley is a bad friend to in large text so they could see I've posted this before they've all posted again because it really was the most passive-aggressive thing I've ever done at my first apartment I had an absolute bottle of an upstairs neighbor he would be up till 3:00 a.m. playing music really loudly then wake up at 6:00 a.m. and take a shower of course being an old complex I could hear his water in the pipes groaning every morning I gave up complaining to the manager such a nice old man but not capable of dealing with conflict after about two months of it now butthole upstairs had a white pickup that he parked at the end of the unit's right outside my bedroom window he kept all his work gear he was a house painter and gutter repairman as best I can tell in the truck overnight without any cover over the bed or his gear so I invested in a little bird feeder to hang outside my window next at his truck for the first week I only put seed mix in it after that for the rest of the year I lived there I put a mix of dried blueberries cranberries cherries and unhulled sunflower seeds in the feeder it was expensive but it was so worth it to see his white pickup and all of his ladders gloves paint trays rollers and tools covered in Barry Burd shirt yep passive-aggressive yes worth it oh yes a good family friend of mine is a frequent customer of the local coffee shop at said local coffee shop there is one handicapped parking space located out front and several non delegated spots the family friend noticed another customer who constantly uses the handicapped spot to go in and order his coffee despite the fact that the manager on staff reminds him to move his car every day because they have several customers who need to use the spot on a daily basis one day the man pulled into the spot went inside everyone was staring at him ordered his coffee proceeded to brush past the manager and walk towards his car my family friend blocked his path at the door and told the man you need to stop parking in that spot we are tired of you treating everyone here like crap the man casually told him to mind his own business my family friend then took the man's cup out of the guy's hands and dropped it on the floor opened the door for the man and said don't ever come back here you're not welcome here the man went back to his car moved his car called the cops when the cops came the manager actually pretended that the man had dropped the cup nobody contested it the guy hasn't been back epic win that is the exact opposite of passive-aggressive I wish I had employed a similar passive-aggressive tactic on the guy who sits directly behind me he's insanely annoying such that he's infamously never sat with his actual team they rushed to fill any seats that come free and there's long list of people who said if you sit me near him I will quit seriously highlights include he seems to have old smokers lungs throat problems such that his voice always escapes as a gurgle squeal he can't help that but he shouts off course so it's akin to sharing the room with a banshee he spends hours per day cramming Bombay mix into his mouth he then chews it with his front teeth for maximum crunch volume he'll still use the phone or shouts at people while eating farts openly and often has an incredibly loud and annoying SMS received tone which needless to say is triggered several times per hour sometimes many times a minute as he conducts some of his extracurricular activities exclusively by SMS of course his desk phone habits are annoying too keypad tone set to on volume set to max and he opens many conversations using the speaker setting he has dozens of keys and his security tags et Cie on a long chain which he slaps and drags about on his desk like a freakin poltergeist that's right he's a banshee and a poltergeist I cracked after weeks of this and told him to shut the Frick up on a Friday morning when he was screeching at the team opposite solidly for an hour telling his version of what passes for jokes he responded with abuse so I went unpunished but I still know I made a mistake being aggressive and swearing at work on second thoughts I wished I'd killed him with a stapler someone at Starbucks ordering for what must have been 10 people and trying to do it from memory and notes they'd taken on their phone I literally pulled up a chair into the line behind them and sat down with an accompanying annoyed sigh really peel em off but they then got out of line and went back through after they figured out what they were forgetting inconsiderate checkout people are the worst on a similar note B who argue over coupons or crap like that end up getting managers involved and end up burning five plus minutes over some minor dispute I feel like chucking quarters at their heads to make them stop stores need a trapdoor and lying that goes straight to hack for these demon spawn I go into posts about being passive-aggressive and Makkah in passive aggressively and then they stalk you and downvote everything you do forever if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check another video bye for now [Music]

Channel: Updoot Studios

Views: 95,925

Rating: 4.9085712 out of 5

Keywords: passive aggressive behavior, passive aggressive, passive aggressive examples, passive aggressive people, passive, #updootst, updoot, updoot reddit, updoot everything, reddit on tap, toadfilms, pewdiepie, reddit, askreddit, funny reddit, reddit stories, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, /r, r/, r/askreddit, top posts of r/, askreddit reading, best reddit posts, top posts of all time, people of reddit, askreddit question, ask reddit, subreddit, sub

Id: -PnSJz-JI4U

Length: 28min 38sec (1718 seconds)

Published: Wed Jun 03 2020