What women have to stop doing!

hey Tony Gaskins here popping in I wanna talk to you today about really understanding what women have to stop doing now I was talking about you know how men have women waiting past three years and it's kind of like what I'm saying is you've heard the term or the phrase when people say it's a man's world and so the same way that you see kind of the same way you see black people or some other minorities tiptoe around America like you really don't see I know as a black person I'm always walking with this black cloud over my head thinking already probably gonna think I'm stealing or they're probably gonna you know I'd be in the store of my wife and she may pick something up and she holding it in her hand closed and she might have a purse on and she holding and she's looking at it I'm like girl ego thank you stealing they're gonna send the people around here and I'm always with that black cloud over my head just from everything I've seen and everything I've experienced and so it's almost like I'm visiting like this is not my home and I don't feel welcome and I don't feel like people don't see color and so the same thing is going on with women and men women are tiptoeing around like it's a man's world women tiptoe around like the man does not love them like the man does not give them any voice and it's a soul as if women have to ask a man for permission to live ask a man for permission to have standards to have wants and desires now like if I told you how my life really is like behind closed doors it really wouldn't even make sense to you because of societal constructs that we've placed on us and like my wife she don't even like for me to say stuff you know she only like for me to say certain stuff because it will make another woman think that oh well if I do that then I might can get them and but you know y'all know I'm transparent and my wife I tell her I say listen okay I got to do the work on the Lord it is what it is so i'ma tell you like this what my wife with me and her people think that when you get married and people think that a woman got to be on her back all the time me and my wife we made love to the mind and so we not are we not flipping and tossing and in the bed you know every night every other night doing all of that we making love to the mind it's real love my wife she don't have to cook and clean and like how we think oh that's a woman's job and then a lot of women you know tough in the comments and say oh well a man could do that a man could come and clean but then in a relationship doing all the cooking and cleaning but my wife she clean when she wanna clean you know and I clean when I wanna clean and we don't know routine ain't no no schedule of cleaning our thing is raising these kids you know teaching them how to clean teaching them how to cook to teaching them about life but my wife is not walking around the house you know cleaning everyday dust then she's not cooking dinner every day me personally I really don't care for I'm out like a home-cooked meal but that's she wasn't raised cooking she was raised playing sports so she wasn't raised in the kitchen you know she was playing volleyball basketball running track and getting straight A's in school so cooking was the last thing on her agenda so when we got together she could not cook a lick really she really couldn't cook nothing now we've been married 13 years she learned how to cook over time just practicing but it was you know a lot of days that and my son you know my older son you know a child he can't really lie but she was learning that she was gone because she was raised as an athlete I didn't know how to cook either I was raised as an athlete so if some parents who thought to a let me teach you how to cook but sometimes when a woman teaches her daughter how to cook and let's be real about this sometimes when a woman teaches her daughter how to cook she's saying to her you need to know how to cook if you're gonna get a man she's not saying you need to know how to cook for yourself now you gonna have you know 1 out of 10 that say you need to know how to cook for yourself but 9 out of 10 times you need to know how to cook if you're gonna get a man even if she don't say that that's what she's thinking my my wife's mom was single you know 90% of her life and so y'all forgive therefore she wasn't raising her to catch a man I ate is how you got to make your bed it's how you got to clean the floor it's like she made her clean her own may hurt you know stay clean or whatever but she wasn't raising her to get a man she was raising her to be a strong independent confident woman so that's why when when my wife said to me in her life a man is an accessory not a necessity which was basically saying you know if you hear cool we'll make this thing work but I'm not going to be chasing you I'm not going to lose my mind over you it is what it is if you don't know how to act right I'm gonna get going and I'm be all right and so to be honest with you as a man what you had to realize is I was a womanizer so I was the the male chauvinists or the misogynist or all the words y'all like to come up with I was all of that and I was like that bad I was nasty okay I was like the bad I'm nasty so I was the worse of the worse like that my homeboys a lot of the women that they lay down with came from me that would my work put in in the streets that was me spitting the game that was me picking up the ladies and then boom yeah you be with him like I was like they're bad and so coming from like a pimp mentality you would think that as a man I would be like my mama need to cook every day she need to clean every day and you're here so many people just a normal conversation put cooking and cleaning on one put you know s OD what I call s OD its own demand okay se okay on your bike se at own demand s OD you'll see a lot of people talking about just put that on a wonder and a lot of women you know I've heard several several women say I'd never ever turned him down for that there never turn him down I'm like wow so on the selfish side of a man you'd like oh man that's amazing but never get turned up man listen I can't count how many nights I was feeling frisky and looked over at my wife and she like I got a headache I can't count on me at night like that's real that's real love that's real marriage you know why because a human has the right to feel and be a human see the problem with women today is y'all robots y'all slaves so you're walking around like I've taught the soul men and women that feel like oh no my wife she cooked me breakfast every morning you know breakfast the easiest meal of the day the air is Friday Friday take two minutes fried turkey bacon but two minutes toast bread with some butter that's my breakfast you ain't had it yet today cuz I woke up my wife she was gonna take my son to the basketball count when she come back she'll come to a you want some breakfast I said yeah nah didn't I like eat I you know what I like to eat up because my mom didn't cook growing up my mama knew how to make one plain spaghetti with crab salad you know the little process crab meat that come in the little plastic container and it looked like crap meaning is chunks and then you know the lettuce that come in the back and some ranch dressing my mom used to get that lettuce on the bag get that crowd a little plastic box put that ranch on the crowd salad and hang out that with some spaghetti and some garlic bread you hear me that's what mama that's the only thing I remember my mom cooking that's the only thing I remember mom cooking the only thing okay my it was Monday night with McDonald's - denied with Burger King win tonight with hungry how was Thursday night was somebody Friday night with piece of hut it was it was that was the American Life and they made a little money and that's what they did and I used to hear my daddy of course he want a home-cooked meal but my mama my grandmother down but my grandma had 12 kids so my mama wasn't necessarily at my mom was the baby so she weren't necessarily raised to cook for no man eat them and my grandma she probably had four or five different men do I hurt you know her time cuz my momma don't have don't share a daddy with any of her siblings her eleven siblings then some of her siblings sheriff daddy did another group share of daddy you know so that was life you know that was life so when I'm growing up my grandma had no man it was her and all her grandkids we at the house and then one of her ex-husband's came to live with her at the end in the end of his life and that's who I knew was my granddaddy but that wasn't actually my mama daddy and so my mom she didn't she wasn't raised to cook you know for no man and so we ate I that's real life and yeah I know y'all got y'all veganism and oh honey I cannot believe you ate that poison from McDonald a little you see I'm here doing good looking good alright nice oh you got to realize like you know I haven't seen people thought it might be vegan and can't fit through it alright you might hit ten chicken uh get up and I know it's not good for you okay I know it's not the world's greatest in rural okay but neither that weed you smoking neither the alcohol you bring it neither that unprotected set you have it I'm talking about no chicken nugget when you got a whole big arm and you unprotected tan you up depositing all kind of bacteria you then you can talking about a chicken nugget man please come on now let's get this thing together but back what I was saying is I [Music] my mama didn't cook so guess what I like to eat I want the house chef chef Olive Garden on Monday Tuesday I wanna have chef Kobe steak house wins I won't have chef full rebels Thursday they made a new thing called Aussie it's a drive-through it's from Outback Steakhouse I wanna have chef Aussie bright that might want to have chef Panda Express sandy chick-fil-a Slendy I might I want me some Jamaican food in me so I get a different chef from around the world every day my wife ain't got to cook Oh ain't gotta cook guess what okay I got make some more money cuz that is not affordable it ain't easy to force so a got to get my brine on but you see what I mean what I'm saying is is that yeah if you want to cook at home that's totally fine don't hate cook you know how to cook you love cooking that good but guess what even people don't get tired of a cooked meal I remember talking to a shelf and she said to me she said Tony I'm Michelle I cook every day I'm here to tell you that don't keep a man faithful designer cook for every man that I don't been with and they still cheap I said you might as well been ordering takeout you said I mean you're doing all that cooking it's women that's doing all this cooking all this cleaning all this sucking and ducking and diving and still getting cheated on see what women gotta stop doing is tiptoeing around a man life you got to start walking on eggshells in a man life you got to be a human you got to be a human you got to have feelings you got to have feelings you have to you can't be a robot and that's the problem with women women feeling like oh I gotta serve a man listen a lot of a lot of the man y'all serving is I'd be on coaching calls here hearing about a grown boy and that they'd be filming me I'd be like what you can cheated on you can cuss that and you hook every day for you will go home cooked meal every day you ain't never turning now when you want a Saudi what I'm sitting on hey wait you don't have men at nights I had to [ __ ] o it up like the armored him with bosses watch my wire rollover go to sleep because I kept up late the night before cuz he that's what happened me and my wife we love to talk okay I'm a talker she a talker whoo my wife could talk tonight my wife can't talk okay so she loved at all I loved at all so we'll talk literally easy to 1 a.m. well guess what my wife gets up at 5 a.m. a body wake up at 5 a.m. because she got a 5 a.m. so many days because she liked to get up get my song she liked to get up make their lunches for school she's making lunches for school she earning clothes and she cooked me breakfast she couldn't them you know they hot break eggs or bacon my MA oldest son allergic to eggs and then she wake them up at 6:00 a young getting them up at 6:00 I don't wash their face brush they tea you know and come on for breakfast around by 6:30 6:40 they eaten breakfast and then they leave at 6:50 and to get to school cuz they got to be the school by 7:30 my oldest and so I school about 40 minutes away so that's how routine so if me and her was up talking till 1 o'clock and she gets up at 5:00 she had four hours of sleep now when this happened three full nights in a row you know as they say when you stay up late it don't hurt you the next day it hit you the day after that so you just pull an all-nighter and that next day you almost by fine but the next day you like a zombie that's so that's what happened so my wife should end up with a headache she had his headache and then you know I'm like babe okay now we need to get bed I know we love the talk now but we need get bed by 10 o'clock get you a full night rest and so just what if that's happening over and over and over me as a man who loved my wife and this thing with a lot of men and that but this way y'all got to stop playing that you can't you can't play that your honor me a lot of men could see you not feeling good you gotta hit it you had a long day at work you should use stressful and what a lot of men don't realize is that a woman body and mind don't work the same way a man body of mine works so as a woman you got to let a man know that listen I'm not like I'm not no 20/20 push-start okay I'm one of these you got the to turn the ignition all right pump the gas three times all right let me shoot look fuel injection in now I'm on and then I'm a crank on up okay then you got to let me sit for five minutes and let me you know I had a long enough rare bone no it gets me engine up see if that's how you built and when I say that I mean like mentally like you not the type the way you did want a man to come to eat hold off you want a man to come and sit with you talk with you you know watch a movie massage your shoulders a little bit kiss on your neck kissed you know kiss you in the mouth on hangout at 19 you know you want a man take your time with you guess what you gotta let him know that like this play well you're not finna come home with them hard greasy hands dirty faint fingernails and then wanna just come be towing your fingers everywhere you want a thorn banking that that's sexy no play Twilight don't come in here with that bracelet on and wanted to be licking all in Manila thinking that you come in here licking with that breath in my ear with a slaw in my ear finna get me riled up and ready to go oh no go take a shower first take your shower don't forget to wash every part of your body like you got to let a man know that as a woman like and see this a thing what a lot of women doing wrong is when you want to express yourself you got to have a coaching session before you to figure out how you're gonna tell a man song that's not your man is not God your man is not special your man ain't nobody that okay just like you so you just gotta walk up to him sit them on down and say hey listen I gotta tell you something you know I just want you to understand that like you know I'm different I may be differ from other women you've dealt with and I'm not a type of where you just can come and just push on the bed and then just think I'm ready to go like no yeah I need quality time you gonna have to come home we're gonna have to talk about my day talk about your day you know take a shower key words shower and you know turn the lights out light a candle you know put on some soundscapes and alright take our time but I'm not the type where you getting ready to go to bed and because you've been lusting after you have naked booty women on Instagram you wanna flip me over and take that out on me when you talk to me and don't know how my day was so you see this way I'm talking no I'm not yelling I'm not cursing I'm not calling names I'm just being direct just being straight up and that's not my wife did me like I tried to be a typical man hey man I'm gonna need some mo off you like hey I'm on I like you want have to put up mold I have to do whole life all the women I am one well go be one of them there and then make sure you don't come back and you know hey I'm gonna need some more watches like come on so once a week it will be at least three times a week oh listen will you put your phone down then one wife said to me will you put your phone down if you put your phone down and spend some time talking I might want to do something but you can't be on your phone all day checking emails and comments and then compaint i'm song you know jack in the box that you just wind up and and you know and she does it in so many words she's not when it come to expressing herself to me about what she wanted me she don't give me no dissertation she do not hold no town-hall meeting it's like one or two sentences and it very direct it's no yelling in it it's no cursing in it but I get it and it made me feel stupid you hit me it made me feel stupid I'm like man you know what she right I'm trying her like a basil you know a bass is a drug addict cranky I'm trying to like a basil I say man I got a do better so this was years ago this was years ago and I had the taking and I implemented meal system that hey and I got to get back to it cuz I cuz now I've been half you know be the head of the block ministry and so it's been taking me more time to go through you know 30 minutes to an hour a day to see who need to be blocked and so I'm trying I'm gonna try to see if one of the moderators only know if they could block people in the comments but if y'all who moderators the block people please buy all me you know blah who need to be blocked the detractors and you know people like that so I'm gonna spend more time in running the block ministry and so I said you know I got to get back to this night making sure my phone were down at a certain time and it's just about my wife and I love it but you know what i'ma tell you the truth as a man as a real man i'ma tell you the truth when you fall in love when you fall in love this for the man to you Michael scream record this one part saying is to your boyfriend well as a real man when you fall in love that conversation and that quality turn feel better than the actual thing it's like the actual thing is like a letdown compared to that quality time and their conversation but their quality time their conversation that's stimulating that my see the actual thing is really intended to reproduce and yeah it could be pleasurable or it may not be plated it could be painful for some people you know when some people got a issue to where it's painful and so it ain't just created for play it's not created for pleasure it's created to reproduce now people gonna try to say what they thank God meaningful and something they've meant and God meaningful players know it's there reproduce and you can have some pleasant enough but I'm telling you not being in law that conversation and a quality time feel better as good as all that feel that quality time oh man it feel like a slice of heaven like I just want to get later in jet tall girl let's get taller 4 o'clock in the morning five o'clock in on on just talk about our dreams hopes man that feel good I'm trying to take when you falling in love and I'm when you were grown boy I was a grown boy when you were grown boy to all that talking that's miserable only thing you get pleasure from barely say my name that's all you get pleasure from is just that right there when you were grown boy but as a grown man understand is and that's what as a woman that you got to make sure that you pushing your relationship to real law that is that it's about quality time that it's about quality communication and conversation and it's not just about you cooking and cleaning and on your back you being a robot or slave and see the thing is is a lot of women are raised like that a lot of women raised like that because they raised by women who who was raised like that - where is women is a sector of women who there was just stripped of their self-worth of their wants and their desires and they were made to believe that a woman's job a woman's place is in the kitchen in the laundry room and just serving a man and that the man could go out and have his hobbies and have his dreams and and have his job and a woman just got to sit at the house and you know sniff his booty and and then the woman passed that down to the daughter and then somebody realized what's going on and feels stupid and then try to say oh no you need to learn how to cook for yourself you know how to cook for yourself know when you by yourself you got all the time in the world learn how to cook you ain't gotta learn that there's no child yeah you got all the time in the world it it ain't it is not too hard to read a description of a recipe and follow that you it's been all your young years learning how to cook just stop it okay you were being taught how to cook not for survival you will being taught how to cook as a woman so you can please a man let's just be all the way real with this thing here ain't nobody just try to eat or you need to know how to cook so you can sup I know you if you want a man you're gonna have to learn that cook if you want a husband gotta learn how to cook that's what you was told and let's be honest by that thing not the same time you shouldn't take pride in being sorry you shouldn't take pride in being lazy you shouldn't take pride in not knowing how to cook in not knowing how to wash color clothes or white clothes you shouldn't take pride in that but at the same time you shouldn't want to do those things solely just to get a man or for a man and I remember I never forget that question I got asking my Instagram Q&A which I probably get back to the Instagram killing a hit song but later said what Tony you know how can I show a man that I'm wife material if I don't cook and clean for him when we dating and I was like wow wow I love you Wow and cuz I'm tell ya you really don't need to be doing a man laundry while y'all dating anyways we're gonna cruddy drawers it's like really me smelling in man booty and this ain't your husband with a crud in his drawers and so it's like all of that like that's not a prerequisite for being a wife and if a man say that's a prerequisite for being a wife that's a grown boy that's a grown boy real men are not looking for a robot or no sleigh because what you got to rely is a woman could be anything in the world today light you think you can help Serena William get on that tennis court after doing all this and running up and down and making 200 million dollars to come in the house and be slaving around the house for you know she got the money for a chef and the money for me she's not gonna be in the house even round for you you know I mean you think a woman who she working 40 hours a week wanna come home and have to work another 80 hours around the house no so you got to think like at like logically like my wife don't work for anybody else so she don't work 40 hours a week she don't work 40 hours a week no you let you do that hotel it's just the child says he work all day but and you put all them little pieces together she might work seven hours a week at the moles and her work is on the phone she don't have to talk to people it's on the phone and she earned great money but even with working from home on the phone she still is not no robot or no later where she got to cook a hot meal hot dinner every day and got to be doing a certain type of cleaning every day no because it's other parts of life so you you gotta be taking the kids here and they're taking them the count picking them on from town taking on the saga pratik picking on for soccer practice you know you want to step on foot a little date with your husband you got that you know do this do that is other aspects of life than just cooking and cleaning and being on your back and allowing a man to yell at you curse at you run in and out the door he going and coming as he pleased y'all were together for a while you know getting an argument he get mad and he ghost you for 4 days 7 days 14 days and then he's popped back up like ain't nothing really happened and you've been sitting on pins and needles waiting on him to come back and then you take him back y'all together another strong 6 to 8 the 12 months boom happen again get in the argument he take off again he go I spent a week or two with his girlfriend that he'd been courting while y'all been together on and you been on pins and needles on eggshells the woman he'd been talking to behind your back he goes spent some time with her he got her thinking that he is a powerful businessman because he got you to spend your hard-earned money that you working 40 to 60 hours a week for got you to buy him a top-of-the-line watch so nine off the gifts you buy him he got the side woman thinking a he a powerful businessman and he got to be away for work and that's why he only get to come spend a week or two with her every three to six to eight to 12 months so she thinking she got her cane you mean she thinking that hub man is a hang and really he is a peasant and he running in and out you're like going outside yo head dog and you I starting arguments with you just to get a break so he could cheat in peace and then while he cheating in peace you climb you stressing you you upset your stomach hurt and you can't eat you can't sleep you got a headache you neglecting your children doing bad at word and and you waiting on him to come back when is he gonna come back when is he gonna come home my goodness like I just love him so much and you just just going through all of this and it's like a man on love you how do you think a slave master felt about a slave your property your property if I could sell you them sell you that's how that man treating you your property a cook is food cleaning the draw coming on get on your bag start argument with me if you want to I'm Ali I'm a divorce yeah I'm alia he threaten you to leave he threatened you - chief he doing all this and you dealing with that come on Knight you putting up with that and then this man telling you why harm I know your wife if we in sleeping together how am I know your wife if you don't cook for me if you don't click that ain't got nothing to do with being Hawaii hey I didn't do it being Hawaii because guess what a woman you that distress he got you on them you could have a stroke then you came be intimate you can have a surgery what have you got to have a surgery what have you got you a polyp or cysts um well you got to have your surgery now you down eight to 12 weeks you can't do nothing for 12 weeks that's three months if he going losing his mind cuz he wants some three both times a week what are you gonna do for 12 weeks you said I'm saying that's why you have to understand that if you can't have a relationship that's bigger than you cooking cleaning and being on your bank you don't have anything you slay you prisoner when we will slay that what the women had do they had the house woman the house lady cooking she clean happy feels slay she out in the field she doing cotton pickin kite and she doing all of this and then when the old nasty master one of them something okay thank you for the food thank you for doing this laundry okay thank you for and relaying saying thank you saying you better have a cook their food you better how to be a good lunch you better have a pick that card now come on here yeah take the clothes off think about that no no not now ask yourself what you doing today with your man today how is that any different then what a slave woman had to do with the slave master how would that any different than what you're doing with a man that is not serving you that's not treating you like a queen he cussing you out he cheating on you catching him texting other women like another one of the pictures have naked pictures on Instagram he goes to you when he was the one that started argument and he he goes to you so you cooking you watching you dirtied wrong and you know what round boys I grew around boys you know I was a boy you know and I'm a man I've been around I will grow me in on football team 95 men on the football team in college it grown me and still how crude and they drove so eat you cooking [Music] ain't got enough seasoning this you're losing it I don't want ya autumn isn't something pause I'm from Domino can't believe it yeah I'm gonna work for doubt Domino man decided man treat you did man I told you I'm saying when a man loved one I'm on tape true said no wine eating a fool got some ice on it and nom why should look stop lying you're lying if it's not good just don't eat it if it's not good just don't eat it you're lying that's when a man love a woman you gonna eat that you mean what evening around here can you like a me treat you like a speed and get the food on my face man order me some Domino they got they didn't change they processed a prank T in that bag and stay hot from time it lead up to time again yeah man oh no and you like you trying to fight back the tears okay fine I tried yes can I have a cheese pizza no no pepperoni he doesn't eat pork okay he's enlightening he's not like you swine so now you beat up on the lady answering the phone because you're maint this beat up on you so now you callin the latest wine because your man don't eat no pork come on this what you in this is the relationships that y'all settling for the day I'm here to tell you that got a queen right here okay you read wanna influence you need to read this this that's really why you failed in that life because you got the material and won't utilize the material if you have not every eye that laid eyes on this your video need order this book to day you mean this right here don't change your entire life let me tell you right here it's a queen right yeah doing queen things give me Queen ain't no slave Queenie don't slay why cook what you want cook clean when she won't clean and make lunch you wanna make love all right it's on hot time it's on her schedule if I got signed a complaint I didn't get what I get my butting in non cooking buddy that cook I tried going in and try to say I'm gonna tell him to make a point you know I'm saying wife ain't cooking right now she's gonna tired and got to Mike why don't let me go in here cook Manny man we bid it to that chicken and we caught all kind of Salmonella we had all kind of Salmonella e.coli in that chicken I said you know what imma just stay out of the way cuz my strong point I trying to fold clothes and you know it my wife won't he let me fall clothes so my wife won't let me cook and she won't let me fall because I wasn't raised and taught how to do all of that I'd know how to do it now I know how to do it if I got to do it I know how to do all that but it ain't my strong suit cuz if you know I'm a little rusty so I go to fold a shirt it's gonna look like somebody balled it up I'm a little rusty and I could practice every week get it down but you know she wanna do it she got an a-type personality no let me cook no let me do it and I'm gonna watch this let me watch this because you believe in stuff on the plate and I got rewashing anyway so just that wait so guess what she let me operate in my gills help china help the world you know how I might write my books create my courses do my engagements coach my clients she let me operate in my gills and then around the house she let me operate in my gills it certain things that she needed me to do that she can't do or don't want to do put this together unscrew this screw this do this do this so she let me do what she don't want to do and what I can do then I let her do what she want to do and what I can do or not that good at vice versa and that is a healthy relationship there's no gender roles I may have to do some one day you know that she normally does and she take pride in what she does so like yesterday she had a dance appointment so I had to get up in her place and get my sign take him to took to school to count take him to the count and getting over back up where we yeah and taking the count and he wasn't too excited about that but what Mommy does all the time what he was cool my other son rolled with me so I didn't sit down oh you ought to put that box want me back you know that what you do I got to get I gotta go make money I make money and never what some man do no I ain't doing that I make money I heard other one Panama drawer of the bill what you talking like do this do that I've enjoyed our video so that's what's on man do and then the woman like oh my goodness and then you juggling all of this stuff and you got to lose your mind because you trying to be Robo woman go go gadget legs go go gadget on don't go catch your eyes go go gadget spatula you know go go gadget launch a raid you're trying to do all of this stuff and you were human then the next thing you know you send in the bathroom on the toilet crying you get in your car to go grocery shop and you got to sit in the parking lot of cry you're going to work your job and before you get out you got to cry because you have accepted a mediocre life telling yourself that this is life no that's not life that's your life that you are willingly accepting and you saying well I just can't leave we got kids together no okay don't leave you got lead but just change the rules of the game stop being a slave stop bending over backwards for a man that ain't standing up for you picture that not fix that picture bending over backwards for a man that won't stand up tall for you they won't even be a stand-up guy for you and you've bent over backwards for him come on picture them think about that talk about you walking like this you bending over backwards for a man that won't even be able stand up guy come on now what sense does that make what sense does that make not listen now these long videos not be going about an hour I got a pep talk to you for our because I got a pep talk to you for our because you don't believe that you were for anything you don't believe that you were that you don't believe that you could you feel like you stealing some a man from the world if you won't cook every day if you don't cook 3-4 times a week you feel like you stealing no no that's not so duty in life to be no cook [ __ ] oh man oh sorry spanking must be booted man come on yeah eat me I got to give it a go they got it because listen I'm telling right here why why she living like a queen she living like a queen she do what she wanted to when she want to do a high seam on the door if it makes sense and that what she want to do that was she gonna do you know my only requirement does she artists been that she faithful that's it because that's all that matters in the grand scheme of thing I can't build an empire with a liar I can't build an empire with a cheater if she honest and she faithful everything got like cooking cleaning lovemaking all of that right now oh that is a bonus that's a bonus seeing when you got a real relationship what you realize is that sex is a plus not a priority men and women think that that's a priority so what happened when your body is not able to do that what happened if something happened to you you go through something and your body is not able to do that what happened if you gotta get a surgery what happened if you go through something mental and you're not able to do that so now your relationship over because you made s OD a priority see it's a plus being a merit man you know being a merit man in the relationship it might not work I for two weeks with a s OD you might go to week sometimes you might go three week and guess what still have all the love in the world it's bigger than that that's why I wrote in my book I don't know if it's a woman's influence so make it work that sex is a plus because sometimes it's just like what's the point of it like people think that that means that your relationship that that is an indication of your no because the people who in a relationship that's having that every day being the worst relationships because that's all it's about and men because men want that me and gonna write articles and write books and put that on the list of things that you have to have for relationship to be happy no no because your spouse could become wheelchair-bound just your spouse could have a stroke your spouse could go through a surgery that put them out they they could get a back surgery that go back and be out of commission for 1216 weeks and then got to go back and get a reconstructive surgery so they can't do this they can't be down there doing is singing on the microphone you know peach cobbler can't be on a bike can't be on they stomach they can't do none of that with that bike surgery you see the Golden State Warriors coach Steve Kerr had a back surgery so what you thinking you're not going with that back surgery not enough putting down so if that's if so that meant everything and see you bite that's just fine so he can't he ain't no peach cobbler evil so his wife had to go without for that period of time so if she made that a priority their relationship would have broke down you see what I'm saying that's why you got the mature so I'm here to tell you sometimes just don't work out which with the way your schedule born with the way your body feeling with what you're going through with what's going on sometimes it just don't work out it might be a whole week whole two weeks hold three weeks and then guess what when you finally everything kicking on all cylinders you'll body feel it right your schedule right and you were able to come together who is you hit B is fire worse it's like Oh Maxwell you Maxwell on that song that came on love basketball it's you like you in LA and guess what it's been a week it's been two weeks it's been three weeks I don't know you know people go for week five yeah you go for week five weeks six weeks cuz after women have a child sees wheeze if you love her and you respect her healing process and she is you know that type of personality SH you want to follow the doctor orders not some one man pot that pot that may like covered a bike riding cowboy it to three-day they riding cowboy being worried about everything you know yeah look Jim and Akane every painting in there and she won't kill some women deep they might not care and guess what the man might not care either both ladies sorry both for your eating it but the doctor say listen wait six weeks okay before we have in your funny business so guess what educated people who got some sense and some self-control gonna wait the six weeks even if you read at three weeks or four weeks you're gonna wait the six weeks so your relationship gotta be more than just physical stuff you cook you clean you own your bank you gotta be real love you gotta be communication gotta be understanding gotta be pure gotta be whole gotta be healthy so let me help you understand this this possible this is possible because I'm living it and it's beautiful it's beautiful yeah it might be okay I think about it though as a man I'm like right yeah man I love my wife cook but if she cook everyday I'll be tired of that too cuz I like variety me and love variety so it's like you cook every day a person the way a person cook everything they cook gonna have they same kind of flavors they typically don't use they don't have three sometimes folky season is that they season a chicken with they beef with or four y'all are y'all vegan they tell wit they using the same you didn't the sprouts asparagus type of seasoning so if somebody could of you every day you're gonna get tired of that too if you eat not Oh guess what during you know we lockdown we were you doing takeout right we're gonna take out guess what after two three weeks again lockdown you know what up to eat got tired of that because you have to taste air yeah the taste of town so we got tired of that so I say that to say a relationship should not be this robotic thing like it feel good sometime to have a messy house to have closed air well you need that sometimes like okay we live and we normal we ain't in we not the proud family to prior family you know that that the the black-and-white movies the work everything in a perfect place all the time you need to know that you live in life and you are justin and you adapt there and that you really live in and not just existing you can have one thing out of place because your man that particular it was laid you not a wife you're not a girlfriend you property you don't see you as a person your property when you got a headache and you don't feel like being on your baby for one of you not in math if you not married you insane already so now not only is you in sin on your baby but you in slave sin cuz not you properly on your bite and don't feel like being on your baby but guess what you can't speak up for yourself because you afraid that he's gonna get mad so what if you get man that'll scratch a bootie to get glad so what it he get mad you afraid he gonna cheat so what you could leave oh you want to cheat oh oh you want to go oh you want to go like ten women have naked pictures oh here's the ground try to make me okay alright purse uh-huh I'll see you I told you about that purse right that bird okay see you yes alright but nice knowing you I'll see you later I'm out here get gone guess what you're gonna cry in a car you gonna cry but he don't have to know that he don't have to know that dancing 10-man yes in certain in my relationship I'm gonna see my wife cry for me one time when we were young when we were y'all and I try to pull a grown boy car and she was in the postpartum situation I think that's what it's called for something okay it's another word that mean post mortem or something postpartum it was out to our first song and I try to pull a homeboy card you know a fate like I'm just stressed I don't finnaly that's the one time in 13 plus years of marriage been together 14 or 15 years that's the one time I seen my wife cry one time and boy that day hurt me so bad I said man I got that man I slapped myself I said man I can't show no weakness I can't talk about on she crashed and I'm I'm tired and ready that I what am i doing no but once again how I made my wife cry about me you know what that's the one that's the only time ever it's other time that I tried to pull a grown boy car my wife ain't never let me see her cry bought me ain't never let me see her sweat you hit me she might have cried in the car she might have cried on her pillow after he did you know argument or something like that but I ain't she never let me see her sweat she walk around with her head up her chest side I saw the bank like I said like ain't nothing worth hurting her and we had a deep conversation you know what y'all might call the argument not argument and and well I might have been a grown boy and if I get out of line got out of hand you ready to go that's what I'm trying to tell you tape take back your dignity take back your self-respect love yourself respect yourself stop being a slave stop being property stop walking on eggshells stop biting your tongue when you need to tell this man how you feel you ain't gotta yell you ain't got a curse but express yourself tell him what you need tell him who you are let him know you weren't raised to be nobody property you want raise the beating old no duck on the screen you want to raise the BI he'll sniffing oh man Buddha come on nine you got the warming up you you got to put your yeah you're grown girl pants on not you you got to do better you got to lower yourself you got to respect yourself you you have agency over your life you know all body property you don't have agency over your life he can't tell you what to do when to do it on how to do it you do what you wanna do high it makes sense to you and if he can't get with it that's not your husband if he can't respect your seeds and how you want to move and little life and be a human and let your hair down and breathe that's not your husband hey I got to go I hope this I double talking to you today from the heart I hope it laughs god bless you for the new life coaches make sure you go ahead take advantage of this Father's Day cell the life coach certification is set at 30% Oh the link is in the description we need more coaches we need more coaches on my mentor life because we got too much demand

Channel: Tony Gaskins

Views: 116,180

Rating: 4.9167557 out of 5

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Id: v3MY-4RBY1A

Length: 59min 52sec (3592 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 11 2020