TikTok's Only DIRTY Minds Will Understand

hello everybody and welcome back to my youtube channel or welcome to my youtube channel i'm call me chris you can call me chris and i did a poll on instagram you dirty little people wanted to see some dirty tick tocks i see you you look cute too i'll tell you that you're also very gullible these aren't real glasses i gotcha didn't i probably not anyway let's get into the video what are we doing with the lotion i don't want to see what you got what you're doing with that what are we what is that yeah don't do it what is happening is he gonna i know what he's gonna do he's gonna put his hand on this person's hand and pretend that it's little what is the medical term ejaculation [Music] oh that's cruel that's that's that's plain cruel it's funny though oh my lord have mercy grab me that creature sir grab me that creature oh my god that's disgusting and so funny at the same time babe you want to get naked what did you just say yeah where's the bathroom this girl is all right girlfriend of the year right there that's i mean in like you look like you're in a walmart though i would not do it in a walmart bathroom my standards are low but they're not that low i'm abstinent though so we know that if you can't answer these riddles you might have a dirty mind let's do this first riddle what is long hard and has come in i'll give you a few more seconds to come up with your answer gum did i just say i meant to say um i'm sorry what is long hard and has come in it what is long hard and has come in at what is long hard and has come in it i don't know what is the answer was cucumber right it's gotta come in the middle of it still sounds bad okay next when your best friend sleeps with your boyfriend wait shut up who you he told you what is wrong with you i know this is a voiceover but like oh my god can you imagine don't cheat on your mans okay don't sleep with your best friend's mans go get your own mans because that man's is clearly not a good man's now you know with chris i'm uncomfy babe ask me what i would do if we would break up what would you do i would go back with my ex then go with him no straight up yeah why are you with me if you were to oh i didn't even get that both of us makes sense if you put three fingers into these holes it's going to be a shocker what am i talking about three fingers in a hole through this oh like an outlet like a i think that's it i'm so innocent a light socket same [ __ ] last question what is firm and round and so much more fun when you can put your fingers in it firm round and so much fun when you can put three fingers in it i think of like a t-rex it sounded like a dead crow i don't know orange correct answer is bowling ball oh out of the gutter sorry i need to read i need to pause sorry i'm illiterate my girlfriend invited me to her house where i found her i sat there waiting for my girlfriend while her unbelievable sexy sister was sitting next to me oh god where's this going a few moments later she whispered to me we should have the sexuals well my sister isn't home oh mike is this a real story i hope this is not i immediately got up and turned around to head back to my car good man the story's going good i found my girlfriend standing by the door she hugged me and said you've won my trust oh it was a test that's a [ __ ] up test i would never do that with my sister can you imagine he said yes oh my god oh my god oh my god moral of story always keep your condoms in your car oh that dirty little [ __ ] she was gonna sleep with his sister not his sister that's the incestual random [Music] i'll take 12. don't ask why i need 12 i need 12. baker's doesn't why would you do that to a fish why would you invade its mouth like that that's all my friends are dead the book the dodo bird and the dinosaur all my friends are dead love that most of my friends right what is this all my friends are wait what is going on the tree said all my friends are end tables and then the end table said i was never friends with that guy [Laughter] that's me and my lack of friends i'm an end table i am end table sad interrupting to thank today's wonderful sponsor which is butcher box i personally have been loving butcher box for a lot of different reasons they use high quality meats like 100 grass-fed beef which right now new members will receive two pounds of for the lifetime of their membership they also have free-range organic chicken humanely raised pork and my favorite wild-caught seafood and butcher box is super flexible with their box options you can either get four curated boxes or you can do what i do and get your own customized box and their delivery frequencies fit to your needs and your schedule and you can cancel with no penalty at any time and there's also free shipping which is always a bonus i personally decided in my butcher box on the wild caught salmon cod scallops 100 grass-fed beef burgers and free-range organic chicken and i personally have never cooked scallops before but i decided to go all gordon ramsay on this and i i tried to i tried to make them and it was super helpful because i went on the butcher box website to figure out how to cook scallops and they actually had recipes of all different kinds and a plethora of amazing reviews thank you again to butcherbox for sponsoring this video i am enjoying your product so much you have no idea and i highly highly recommend you click the link to get high quality affordable convenient meat and new members will receive two pounds of 100 grass-fed beef for the lifetime of their membership thank you butcherbox and back to the video if you can't answer these riddles this again yes i have a dirty mind i'm ready for these i'm gonna get them right i have not a dirty mind i have uh the mind of the pope it's prob that's his mind is probably just filthy never mind mother teresa maybe i don't really know i think everybody is a dirty mind nobody's innocent nobody's innocent nobody's safe it was a sick guy first question okay what is harry on the outside but soft and wet on the inside it starts with the letter c and ends with the letter t this is a family friendly channel sir oh what is hairy on the outside but soft and wet on the inside a cat i'm trying to be good the moment to think of your answer the answer is coconut oh yeah that makes sense hey mom can i say one cuss word just just one i did this to my mom when i was younger and she would allow it sometimes but she'd say you can only say it towards a thing not a person so i would just call everything like sorry mom no come on like trust me just one she's gonna let her just one a cuss word what you gonna say make it good okay the only b word i call my mom is beautiful i'm just kidding [ __ ] oh if i said that to my mom she would drive off the freeway she'd sacrifice both of us she'd be like jesus take the wheel and then take my daughter down to hell where she belongs sir sir give me that fish without even soldiers everywhere that fish here we go ma'am ma'am please stop question cause some pain when i go in i'll gladly fill your holes if you ask me to and i'll ask that you spit and not swallow i don't pray very often i'm ready to pray after this put some holy water on my yeah every orifice you're not ready to change faith right now we respect that i cause some pain when i go in i i'll gladly fill your holes if you ask me i have no idea i i have an idea but not a good idea the answer is dentist okay dentists are freaks though i see you nasty putting your hands in people's mouths and trying to ask them questions about their dates why you still aversion did you say virgin i can't even hear myself virgin bully says why are you still a virgin nerd i was until last night bully yeah okay bud nerd just ask your sister bully dummy i don't have a sister nerd you will in nine months that looks like a sebaceous cyst i only know that because i watch doctor grandpa popper lovey girl sir of course of course like any video that starts with something nasty happening with fingers or fish this guy said i love it that's specimen but sir we don't know what it is me thinking about my crush it's you him [Music] please i don't yep that's all right you looking cute okay you're gonna just walk away girl yeah just walk away don't make eye contact just guys who can [Music] throw me around like a rag doll [Music] you are like 12. that's a cream that's a crime let's call the police oh my god look at she's but like same gross i have the same belt as her did he just get finally what gets longer when it's pulled fits snugly in between breasts will choke you if used incorrectly but fits neatly into a hole and works really well when it's jerked bro are you just sitting around thinking about these what gets longer when it's pulled that snugly between breasts will choke you if it's used incorrectly a necklace i don't know it is a seat belt do you have oh okay i'm determined to get one of these right i think i've only got one right what is something that most women love some smell nice okay well there's not so much okay it's long and hard when it's young okay it's soft and small when it's old soft flowers flowers the answer is a candle oh ow peter peter griffin i just trailed off so hard there my average size is about six inches you can bring out your mouth around me at least once a day and when you're done with me you should probably spit not swallow i can get this one i know i can okay six inches wrap your mouth around it when you're done with me you should probably spit not swallow um i don't know that was a bad sound oh my god i have no idea i have no idea a lollipop no a popsicle that doesn't make sense the answer is a toothbrush god damn it god damn it goddammit i'm okay okay i usually go in raw and slide down your throat rather nicely i make some people gag and have a salty aftertaste what am i usually going raw and slide down your throat rather nicely they make people gag a salty aftertaste seaweed correct answer is an oyster oh okay well okay i feel filthy i hope you guys enjoyed the video if you did please like the video let's get this video to 100 000 likes mostly because i don't think you can do it personally yeah that was a dig so dig it or don't i don't know like the video please that's all you're gonna say i just need that there are a couple videos here that i think you guys will really enjoy i hope you have a fabulous rest of your day and i will see you guys in the next video okay bye [Music]

Channel: Kallmekris

Views: 2,056,732

Keywords:

Id: otEAhAIxrtA

Length: 13min 21sec (801 seconds)

Published: Sat Jan 22 2022