People DYING Inside TikTok's

hey do you live on mars because you are out of this world yeah i'm an astronaut and my next mission is to explore uranus is that a telescope in your pants are you just happy to see me hey girl how about you let me orbit around that ass hey do you feel that strong gravitational pull of my bed all right that was weird but i hope you liked it anyway well i'm call me chris you can call me chris i just wanted to use some pick-up lines on you you're looking extra scrumptious today today we are watching people die inside because i can relate to that and most people can too so let's get into the video on a side note i got this jellyfish lamp this is freddy and that's stevie this is what i spend my money on thank you feeding a little deer where is he that he's feeding deer it's oh oh my god i'm sorry oh my god i love that so much that's like it's like when i first like start seeing somebody get like a crush on somebody and i'm just like oh hi yeah it's yeah it's great good to see you yeah you're cute yeah my feelings start to come in and i'm just like just shove it down shove it down it's so freaking oh domino excuse me that is what it's like having five siblings living in a household i would know i never got to eat pizza i just got leftover rice fridge that was stale hit my peach on purpose fabulous journey because of this guy his laugh made it 10 times funny [Laughter] oh we've all been there just no sir no just kidding that's just happened to me not me the other way around sad just kidding motorcycle oh is that a diavel i like ducatis love it hopefully no she dropped the takati break up with her immediately unless that's hers no it's not hers i shouldn't have assumed that it's rude but you gotta break up with her now's art [Laughter] if i have kids that is how i'm calling them to dinner i'm saying it now are you like them [Music] i like that she sounded beautiful this man's mustache is outstanding let me just say that okay we should put a bowler cap on and put him in the peaky blinders and he'd fit right in what is he trying to do put an acer in this case it's not going to fit sir what do you do that's not sponsored by acer i know that he's sanding it he's puttying it why did he spit on it that was sexual and now it fits or doesn't fit oh no doesn't fit oh no where is he where are you going okay well it was a waste of a laptop but all right oh trampolines man oh i was like how did this person make no sound i almost died on a trampoline once story time i was jumping on a trampoline right picture me jumping on a trampoline i was about 11 years old and my sister double jumped me so high into outer space okay i was floating around on her space and i fell back down directly onto my stomach like the bar on my stomach i literally word for word said goodbye cruel world that's how dramatic i was as a kid and my sister thought i was gonna die and we called the ambulance and everything i was fine it just really hurt oh damn where uh where did you get what's this oh it was a mustache oh yeah where did you get that pressure washer just for my own reasons absolutely making the weirdest sounds i swear like ketchup just listen to this did you hear that why are fart noises so funny i don't know why oh i felt it on me ah we've all been there kitty oh my god he like hit him inductive like siblings don't tell mom runs out of there perfect moment ruined what's he gonna do oh oh oh oh he's humping him he's like you know what jerry i like what you're doing with that guitar it's actually turning me on quite a bit so i'm just gonna go ahead and give that's all right oh god i love huskies [Applause] oh he hit like a really nice note there it's me when ubereat sent you a notification that's like we're really busy right now your food's going to be late i'm like on a bike how does that even happen oh it's a cute sneeze my sneeze is like loud it can either be like this [ __ ] or it could be like eh why this is something i would do 100 on my own by myself i wouldn't record it though yes i would why didn't i say that what is she doing what is she doing what is she i think that's how i'm gonna die just living alone and i just do some [ __ ] like that i set up a camera lock myself on a table and just wither away i hope she's okay interrupting the video to thank today's wonderful sponsor which is dragon city as you can see i am i am a fan of dragons and i am a fan of video games as well dragon city is a free-to-play game where you can collect thousands of dragons with different elements and rarities and build your own dragon empire click the link in the description and get a free starter pack 15 000 food plus 30 000 gold and an iceland dragon i personally travel a lot so it's nice to find a game i can just play on my phone to pass the time and i actually really enjoy playing this game you will need to collect food gold and gems so you can tailor your city and reach new levels you can breed two dragons and get new ones hatch them and feed them to evolve then you can train your dragon and take them to battle in order to make them more powerful if you like battles check the combat and arena fights where you can challenge your friends and other dragon masters you can become a member of an alliance interact with other dragon masters there you can trade orbs join alliance events and unlock special rewards there are several events every week and a brand new battle pass where you can claim new prizes and dragons daily you can also find the dragons of your favorite youtubers so click the link in the description and get a special free starter pack which is 15 000 food 30 000 gold and an iceland dragon thank you again to dragon city for sponsoring today's video and let's get back to the video played in new york city and i'm so excited to get whoa hey i'm walking here i'm really excited listen to me we don't talk like that we don't say things like that you understand do you understand okay sorry i said i've been in new york and people are like that and i kind of love it like nothing gets done here in canada because everybody bumps into each other like oh sorry and they're like oh sorry bud no no it's me i'm sorry he's like oh can i get you a double double he's like no no no i'm sorry i'll get you a double double and they're just talking forever and then in new york though she's like hey [ __ ] you get out of my way and you're like all right sir that is yeah okay you've established your territory i'm gonna move oh don't cut your oh no that's gonna spike up it's gonna spike what did i just say to you i said it was gonna spike up but it's look at that [ __ ] make it work that looks like thin ice and that is when he knew he [ __ ] up i'm concerned about a lot of people in these videos wait let me see your hands let me see your hands if not what is that paint it's it's not washing starting oh it's it's permanent is it not washing off she's got a eggplant on her face i've been there before i drew like a tiger face on my face or no i didn't i was at like this painting thing but they didn't use face paint face paint they use paint paint i was a tiger for days oh this spritz oh god that would burn your corneas god damn it that was funny [Music] it's like there's no way out there's no way out it's like when you're sneaking out of the house and then you step on that one stair that goes and then you sprint back upstairs and then you hit all of the squeaky stairs you're like and then your mom hits you just me banana mario kart that's the best sound ever i'm gonna throw a banana at somebody yeah a little lower a little lower yeah keep going what is in that watermelon just go all the way through ew is that like a plethora of nutella or is that actual okay okay oh oh he's making it look like she put her hand in a pony's ass that makes no sense because she came out on the other side and it was like free air and she just came out like through the pony stomach i don't know how this is going to play out the relaxation she's like dude your soda's on your car i do that all the time your soda's on your car oh no oh no no no that is the worst case scenario did she just do the finger of the camera oh she didn't realize it was recording oh her face yeah just drop it won't break it won't break though it won't break expectations versus reality so we're about to find out like pasta kookaburras oh what are the kookaburras again are those those those big rats those big rodents it's a bird why did i think it what am i thinking of chupacabra that's a mythical animal what am i thinking of what are those big rodents called they're the biggest rodents in the world what are they called what are they called what are they called capybaras kappa bars jay look it up this is a capybara that's what i thought it was this is i was way off okay he's giving it to him oh yeah he ate his finger i thought it was a french fry has anybody ever done that before when they're eating french fries like just you gotta be eating french fries like real fast which i think we've all been there especially mcdonald's french fries and you just bite your finger hard just me now i'm embarrassed [ __ ] i don't have like any muscle oh why would you do it on the bed she is the definition of a hot mess i fit under that description as well comment below if you're also a hot mess a pizza pizza okay i don't know what you said ah pizza in the oven oh this can never be good oh no what is this squid game [ __ ] is he attached oh he's attached to something why would you do that why would you do this oh buddy i'd be the same i'd be this i wouldn't be in that situation because i'm smart enough not to be in that situation but she gonna what are you doing yeah did your tooth come off she lost a tooth trying to i can't defend these people anymore i just i can't all right that concludes the video that a lot of people need to make some better life decisions what i saw there if you liked the video please like the video it really helps out the channel and let me know if you guys like to see this kind of content i have some videos here that i know you guys will enjoy as well also subscribe if you're not already subscribed this is the bestest youtube channel ever obviously and i will see you in the next video beautiful okay okay bye [Music]

Channel: Kallmekris

Views: 2,389,100

Keywords:

Id: 1gthvWorte0

Length: 13min 18sec (798 seconds)

Published: Sat Jan 29 2022