This Low-Budget Knockoff Movie Has Scarred Me

ah yes madagascar another movie series the dreamworks decided to squeeze the living life out of until the ip ran dry it's been a while since i've seen madagascar but i do remember having a particular love for the penguin that didn't know how to speak it starred very notable voice actors such as chris rock david schwimmer and of course the illustrious ben stiller who by the way was on the cover of time for most likely to be that one guy that sticks around behind at a party after everyone's left and makes the host very uncomfortable when you've got such a powerful blockbuster series such as madagascar it's to be expected that there are people that are gonna make knockoff i've covered knockoff mockbuster movies on this channel before one of them notably was called the prodigy which was a kung fu panda knockoff written by robert d hannah well our boy robert is back with probably the crowning achievement of his writing directing and producing career a little film called life's a jungle africa's most wanted there's a slight chance that title might seem familiar to you because it was released the same year as madagascar 3 europe's most wanted so i think essentially what good old bob was trying to do here was he was trying to capitalize off of the hype that was building for the new madagascar movie i can't name a single person that was like a fanatic of the madagascar series oh i gotta [ __ ] see ben stiller play a [ __ ] lion i need to see chris rock play a zebra and do the dance i genuinely just don't know why people would choose this movie over a studio produced animated film or maybe like some six-year-old's parents just didn't want to pay to take him to the new madagascar movie so they just bought a dvd of life's a jungle because they're [ __ ] six and they don't know the difference pretty much the only similarity that this movie has with the entire madagascar franchise is that you've got an animal living in cushy life that is removed from that environment and he has to figure out how to sort of make it in the wild so strap in buckle on up get your loins warmed up let's watch another terrible movie this'll be fun [Music] hey sorry about the mess i'm moving out of my childhood home quick announcement though my merch has been live for four days now i'm currently wearing one of the pieces right now this is the milk tie-dye shirt i freaking love it me and leighton stallard work super freaking hard on these designs and i hope you guys like them we've also got the outro design shirt the empire state of milk shirt the cream times cream time hat and the cyber cow war tea if you're interested in getting this merch then you can check it out at thegoodstuffmilk.co and the link is in the description for all of you have already purchased merch so far thank you guys so much i seriously appreciate the support it's actually been crazy and i'm really proud that you guys like the designs as much as i do all right back to the video baby listen no movie review would be complete without reading first a plot summary of the film written by the filmmakers themselves pip thought he had it all a pampered lifestyle huge mansion and adoring owners that is until the taylor family booked an african safari pip finds himself separated from his clan which forces him to reluctantly adapt to a new way of life in the jungle as he bridges the divide between feuding wildlife he learns that caviar and manicures can never bring the same happiness as friendship oh that's beautiful that's [ __ ] beautiful like any respectable blockbuster set in a jungle we open up with plenty of really badly tracked sweeping shots of the jungle in which we spend most of this movie in [Music] it's also sort of a marker for how robert d hannah opens up his movies because this is practically exactly how the prodigy opened up [Applause] we get a glimpse of the incredible biodiverse atmosphere that bob's built with this film it's really incredible especially with these two [ __ ] birds here [Music] i don't think i could animate a pair of birds that badly even if i tried if i was a tiger walking through a jungle and i saw a bird acting like that i would have been like you're first i'm coming for you next up is a three-toed sloth that is swinging from a very rigid vine [Music] also i noticed that there's really no trees that that sloth could be swinging from at the moment because the only things in the area are like four bamboo shoots and they definitely don't have offshoot branches that are strong enough to support a sloth swinging from a vine he looks like he's doing some sort of reverse pole vaulting that also doesn't consider gravity this intro lasts for about a minute and a half longer which i don't know if you know this but that's actually a minute and a half longer than i would have preferred only to end on this incredible shot of a dog wearing a sweater vest exiting a tent on his hind legs and you might be saying well ted the animals in madagascar walk on their hind legs so that's a strike for me we'll hold that strike there for one moment user three four five six two nine okay cause the dog literally goes right up to his owner and just starts interacting with him on his hind legs alright so the theme has been set folks and that theme is there is no consistency on how these animals interact with humans and also each other in regards to stature also this dog is not only wearing a sweater vest but he's also wearing a shirt under it like this motherfucker's layering oh this dog's looking like a gucci model i regret saying that so the owner of the dog comes up and starts talking to him and the dog is still standing on his hind legs so i guess what we would consider as the audience right away is that this is just a dog that stands on his hind legs right which is an interesting piece of lore to wrap your head around but it gets more confusing later so the boy and the dog whose name that we now know is pip start driving across the sahara because they're going on a safari in the jungle and there's just this strange lack of sound throughout this whole scene [Music] there's a haunting absence of sound in this scene it is spooky and there is also an abundance of incredibly dangerous driving maneuvers on the part of the safari guy [Applause] i don't know who hired this guy but he's gonna [ __ ] kill this family and he almost does eventually they just reach a sign and what's funny about this sign is that it's only made up of symbols like there's just this implication that there's no infrastructure around a an organized safari like come on who's running the safari the mafia once they reach the jungle there's this terrible opening shot of them at this place called vista point which i'm pretty sure is a village but it's populated by rhinos this is what i was talking about before why are rhinos standing when humans are just passing by and why are they standing like this i'm not even sure if they're trying to do what they do in madagascar or even toy story where when humans are around they pretend like they're not what they actually are in this case they don't even care can you imagine the [ __ ] power play it would be if you were an intelligent rhino and you were just like i'm gonna [ __ ] stand up on my hind legs and wave at the humans as they pass by what is going through the rhino's mind that they're just like hey how's it going so they travel deeper into the jungle going like 60 miles per hour first of all so you know illegal but for some reason this one rhino is completely minding its own business but upon seeing the car it gets beyond pissed off [Music] and he intercepts the jeep and attacks it which of course knocks pip off the jeep and then he bounces down the hill and passes out [Music] oh okay flashback that's a that's a marker of a good film so essentially what this scene serves to do for the audience is it shows them that pip was like a spoiled brat of a dog i guess he uses a golden toilet he can recognize himself in a mirror he is fed caviar and fish he also just like openly talks to one of his owners at one point and she reacts as if she heard him you missed one so they're having a conversation because clearly these animals can't decide whether or not they want humans to know if they can talk or not next up is this like anti-cat scene where it intros with this shot like the editor really just could not be [ __ ] to include more than one bell jingle and in this one moment here that sound is used 70 times in a row it's just the same sound 70 times the these people making this film are insane you know what i'm just gonna say that alone is enough to be a war crime okay they're going to federal prison he's also wearing an anti-cat shirt as if it wasn't already clear to the audience prior to watching this film that there's a stereotype in media of dogs hating cats he goes and he and he bullies this cat for a little bit because he's an [ __ ] but then as he's walking away the cat picks up and throws a baseball at him and then i think i'm i'm not entirely sure if this is true i think the cat puts a curse on him [Music] that was like an intentional animation thing and we know that the editor won't use new sound effects unless he's [ __ ] strangled to i think the filmmaker is trying to tell us that the reason why pip fell out of the car is because this random [ __ ] cat that he bullied put a curse on it we're only really operating on context clues right now because there's been maybe three lines that's changed in this film so far so he wakes up after being passed out and he's greeted by a baby jaguar which he tries to bully because he's an [ __ ] [Music] but of course everybody knows the rules you [ __ ] with the baby you get the mama's teeth [Music] another funny thing is that right now in the movie after pip has fallen out of the car and passed out for god knows how long that's when the boy realizes that the the dog is gone [Music] mom dad where's pimp which means that after they were literally attacked by a rhinoceros they just [ __ ] kept going didn't check to see if anyone was okay they [ __ ] booked it the next up were introduced to these hyena characters which as expected with any group of hyenas in an animated film in africa they're the comedic relief [Laughter] these hyenas are like italian mobsters or something well pip that big city stuff doesn't play too well out here buddy ain't that right boo boo yeah that's right cuckoo we're in the jungle baby and they basically take pip under their wing as long as he earns his keep so the hyenas take pip back to their house yes i said house because they have a house and before with the rhinos i sort of brushed it off because i was like oh those are rhinos and they just happen to be populating like a human village but no no that that village belonged to the rhinos the rhinos built that village which means these hyenas built that house in fact it turns out that pretty much every animal in this film has a house it seems and the amount of human things that they do just doesn't line up with the fact that they're supposed to be wild animals they're keeping meat in barrels they're storing food so in order for the hyenas to be impressed by pip they basically give them like a trial they want to see how big his testicles are and his trial is to walk across this bridge to reach this conveniently placed bucket of fish um and do your best to avoid the crocodiles that live in the live in the river i don't know what the [ __ ] is wrong with the sound designer for this film but he decided that whenever the crocodiles closed their mouths he was going to use the same punching sound every single time they closed their mouths the sound designer is a goddamn madman he's out of control i have no doubt in my mind at this point that he is a war criminal i had my suspicions before but now i'm definitely sure this man needs to be in prison i do have to say though the way those crocodiles are animated it's pretty good so pip basically falls asleep that night and he has another dream back in the past when he was pampered and he was having a good time and he's getting like a massage from his owner and he decides to turn on the tv and probably the most ridiculous thing that happens next is that they put a knockoff within a knock-on they literally put the prodigy on the tv in this film how big of an ego do you have to have rob to promote your own film within one of your films so pip and the hyenas go down to the watering hole in order to get a drink because they're a little bit parched and i understand they've been doing a lot of work lately in a weird moment i guess pip has the intuition to save the mama jaguar from just being randomly attacked by the evil rhino guy who i guess is like the leader of the rhino clan they mention at some point and he is very protective of his watering hall okay we saw what happened before he attacked a [ __ ] moving vehicle because he he's potentially invincible and then he also says the stupid baby jaguar from getting killed because he waltzes up to the watering hole like an idiot and it starts this really intense and slightly unnecessary standoff between the jaguar and the standing rhinoceros this time you've gone too far after my innocent child but it begins with this shot [Music] like what was that rhino trying to do to the baby jaguar he wasn't trying to eat it because rhinos are herbivores so like i think he was just trying to murder the kid like which is like pretty [ __ ] up so at this point pip pretty much earns his keep with the group he's kind of one of the boys now all right but then we're like 40 minutes into the film and they decide to introduce three new main characters into the film alright i'm gonna go through them right now you've got artie who is either a kangaroo or an anteater but i'm i'm not sure you've got flash the three-toed sloth and here's an interesting point about flash this right here is probably the only point in which robert d hannah has written something that is entirely original which is naming the sloth flash because if you think about it that's the same name as the sloth that's in zootopia that's in the dmv except that movie came out in 2016. this movie came out in 2012. but then all of a sudden there's this whole thing where they just acknowledge a plot hole in the movie they acknowledge that three-toed sloths are from south america but the reason why flash is in africa is because he got lost he's a three-toed sloth aren't you supposed to be in south america well i was never too good with maps and i got lost and he stayed because he kind of likes it here besides i kind of like it here then pip just nods yeah that makes sense yeah okay then there's this bird character named lou who i think proceeds to threaten pip i'd watch your back if i were you always be alert if you don't want to become a tasty meal for someone that was a little out of pocket lou after meeting all of these characters in a sudden shift of tone pip just suddenly goes i want to go home and then runs away you know i really miss nathan nathan's my master i've at least got to try and get home and all the characters are like you're not gonna [ __ ] make it you dumb ass so he gets picked up by a giant bird but then arty shoots like wooden spikes with his mouth at him i didn't know he was a ninja arty's [ __ ] cool so pip's falling out of the sky [Music] i don't know what it is about these shots but they look faker than the rest of the film these shots look like they shot him on green screen within the world that they're in and then basically after falling for like 20 seconds he's saved by luke okay so the next part of the movie really isn't that important but i thought i would mention it just because it's kind of strange i think that this was used just to fill time i'm not sure but i've got a pretty good idea essentially after pip and the gang return to camp they decide to play a game of what is kind of football but not really the film has them play the whole game and it doesn't really serve the plot at all and as an audience member i'm just sitting here and watching this and i'm like what is what is the point of this and then after that pip's like well i'm gonna show you guys a real sport and he shows them golf and listen i'm not even gonna talk about the fact that they had a fully prepared field for this game like they have a [ __ ] ymca in the jungle they essentially reach this point in the story where the main objective is to acquire water from the watering hole so they try a couple of strategies and one of them is where they take lou and like two lu shadow clones or something like they just kind of appeared out of nowhere they try to do like these dive bombs where they scoop up the water and that obviously isn't gonna [ __ ] work but then after having a boys talk with the hyenas pip gets an idea he's gonna recreate human plumbing pip literally designs and builds an entire plumbing system that takes the water from the watering hole and sends it to the village and they're using tools like at this point i just feel like robert d hannah when he was writing this film was just like i'm gonna have him build a town pip remembered the plumbing system and was like i guess i'm gonna build a plumbing system now and of course this wouldn't be a classic f-tier movie by robert de hanna if we did not include a dancing scene all the funds interrupted by the crocodile boys because they found the the plumbing that definitely wasn't just a bamboo stick in the water to them it was plumbing and they knew they were being conned and this leads to the rhinos to literally prepare for war rhinos assemble now i guess when the rhinos go into war mode they get on all fours and oh my god it is terrifying they are moving like aggressive oobleck there is no consistency there they must be simultaneously super strong but also have demon-like flexibility for this to work out for them reminds me of that one meme of that guy who goes from standing to like wolf mode [Music] so the rhinos show up at the good animals place and they just [ __ ] trash everything the thing about these films is that they just start to devolve as they go on and i think that's because the writers and the animators and everyone just gets sick of it at this point so i guess pip is sad because the whole town is destroyed and he decides that it's a good idea to go and mope by the watering hole the entire pivoting point of the main conflict of this movie he decides to just go there how could you possibly justify that in the writing of the film so pip gets chased to the rhino camp by the evil rhino leader and then he gets captured and that's where he finds out the crux of the conflict and that is the rhinos are unhappy because they don't have girlfriends khan where are all the girls don't you miss having a female around once in a while no wonder you're all so mean and surly all the live long day you need to get some girlfriends around here we don't need girlfriends so so so just put a lid on it uh i like girlfriends i get it they're lonely they're lonely rhinos standing around waving but i've never heard of a position where you're so lonely that your solution is to go and persecute other people like why is that the why is that the next best option here so pip escapes from the punch down crocodiles and he runs away and of course as is customary in the filmmaking industry when the character is at its lowest the filmmaker should add in a very sad song that is written to explain exactly why the character is feeling sad through the lyrics of the [Music] song [Music] so pip ends up at what i think was the original rhino village from the beginning of the movie and it turns out that that's a female rhino camp how do we tell that they're female rhinos you ask well they're wearing lipstick and they've got a little bit of sass to them we don't need any men around here in fact we are anti-men so pip essentially tells them hey there are some male rhinos over there and uh i was wondering if you ladies uh were interested in uh you know dating them and they say okay what would you say if i told you there is a large cap of available rhino boys right up the road and they're just looking to meet some lovely ladies like yourselves we need some security around here for protection yeah girl i agree and i always wanted to have a big family all right guys from this point on this is the point of no return in robert d hannah's writing style okay he may have cared a little bit before he may have given a bit of a [ __ ] maybe a smidgen maybe a little bit of a little raisin maybe a little candy corn he may have given a candy corn of a [ __ ] he does not he does not care anymore he just goes off the rails with the writing here i don't i can't even explain what's going on at this point so the next scene um they are in a rainforest themed bar and uh they've essentially created a rainforest cafe without any of them having opposable thumbs mind you which also could have been solved if they had included a single monkey character in the film you're perfectly at liberty to add a monkey character in here robert this bar is like a club and one of the rhinos is a bouncer and now pip is cool with the rhinos okay he's one of the boys now but the crocodiles are not happy with pip for whatever reason which is of course solved with pip suddenly knowing how to do kung fu and attacking one of the crocodiles [Applause] so everything's resolved with the animals now everyone's happy they're chilling it's a good time but oh there's a twist pip's owners show up we didn't expect that at all so then there's this weird scene where the boy wants to bring pip back home with him but then pip's like nah nah man i like it here [Music] and the parents and the safari guide are just kind of sitting in the car waiting for the conversation to end but then in the reverse shot there's like rhinos just chatting drinking and hanging out talking in english and the crocodiles are just over there sitting at the bar drinking from mugs they went on a safari to see wild animals and now they're looking at the wild animals and the wild animals are drinking at a bar that they built like come on like what so then pip decides to stay because nobody didn't expect that and then the boy just says that he'll visit like every year i guess okay pip we'll come back boy and we'll pay you a visit every year and then that's the end of the film he just kind of [ __ ] stays so that's life's a jungle africa's most wanted hope you guys enjoyed this video make sure to like the video if you enjoyed it and comment below and tell me if you know of like any weird movies that i could look at because i really do enjoy going through them and and having a grand old time as i mentioned before make sure to go to the link in the description and check out the merch that i launched i worked really hard on it and i hope that you guys like it this is the last video that i'm going to be doing in this childhood home of mine because i'm actually moving out to la and i wouldn't literally would not have been able to do it without your guys's support because i do this for a living now hope you're doing well peace [ __ ] [Music] you

Channel: Ted Nivison

Views: 943,471

Rating: 4.9839954 out of 5

Keywords: This Low-Budget Knockoff Movie Has Scarred Me, This, Low-Budget, Knockoff, Movie, Knockoff Movie, Has, Scarred, Me, Terrible Knockoff Movie, Ted, Nivison, Ted Nivison, Movie Review

Id: I-e1IOyEi5E

Length: 27min 2sec (1622 seconds)

Published: Tue Aug 25 2020