Sister in law demands she caters for my wedding

[Music] we are getting married in december i have never gotten along with my future sister-in-law so i think she is overbearing rude and she thrusts her views down everyone's throat whether it's the right time or not she is also an honor again vegan and when she's on she's preachy and rude but then you can find a wendy's rapper in her car the very next day i think she has bpd but her family seems to tolerate it she is trying to start a catering company easily the fifth business she's tried to start in the five years i've known her my future will ask me if i would consider using sill business so i agreed to meet with her she was rude from the word go it's one of those things where everything from the words she used to the tone was just rude she was on a vegan kick so she didn't even ask me what i wanted but claimed she spent 20 hours coming up with a menu that my southern family could tolerate my family is rancho santa fe near san diego no idea where she got the idea we were from the south what it looked like to me was she scratched some notes on legal pad and claimed that took her 20 hours i told her i was really sorry but i'd always counted on having a great classic dish like ducker lorenge at my wedding and asked if she could accommodate she said she would not use meat at all i asked she'd be willing to make some of the horse divers and she said she'd consider it i thought we were good that night i got a crazy angry call from my future mill that i had pulled the rug out from my sister-in-law i explained to her what had actually happened and mill calmed down a bit but after i explained the real situation well now we are in full histrionic meltdown with sill and she is claiming that if i don't place my order and give her a deposit now her business will fold my fiance and mill are caught in the middle and trying to keep the peace i'm trying to make the point that i don't even think this business will be there in december and then we will have more family drama trying to get our money back from her i relented and asked her how much the deposit would be and the deposit only is twice as much as the total we are paying the professional caterer who is making the main course this is for some sort of vegan finger food i asked her what the total would be and she said she didn't know until the food was prepared i told her i was sick of her nonsense and hung up the phone well now since no one has ever talked to her like that i'm the majorer in the family my fiance my mill and of course my soul rp my future phil is awesome and he advised me not to back down as i'm only one with the balls to counter the insanity since i'm getting mixed messages am i there so my situation is a little difficult so i thought i would confide in the good professional people of reddit couple days ago me and my brother we are hanging out late night doing regular guy things drinking watching sports etc we haven't seen each other in maybe five to six years so naturally we started talking about life and what's been going on the past few years towards the end of our conversation we started to get to the secrets i mentioned something along the lines that i smoked for the first time and in various other substances this was hard for me to tell because my whole life i was pretty much mtd and such we both laughed about it saying just don't let mom find out the joke died out after a little bit and then he just blurted out i cheated on my wife at first it didn't register until i saw his face and he was dead serious i for one hate cheaters but i try to do my best not to judge anyone for their actions he begins explaining this was something that happened about four years ago when his wife was always busy with work she would travel a lot and be away for weeks at a time he told me they were going through a tough time back then lots of arguing not communicating and that he felt really lonely during the same time my brother met a girl at his local gym started off as friends slowly kept bonding and you guessed they did the sex he told me this occasion only happened once and pretty much cut her off after that night because he started to feel guilty for a short while few months later his relationship turned for the better for him and his wife pretty much after his wife's travels slowed down his whole relationship has been great they've both gotten promotions bought a house more family vacations they have a kid he told me life has been good to him now and he's just thankful things have finally worked out as stated before i hate cheaters and i've always felt that the person being cheated on always has the right no i know for sure this would probably destroy their marriage and there would be a fight for the kid my heart tells me i have to tell her because it's the right thing to do especially because i've known my brother to cheat one other time on an ex-girlfriend couple years before his current wife my brain tells me it's none of my business and i should keep my mouth shut i don't want to see that kid go throughout that kind pain either on one hand i betray my brother if i say something on the other hand i betray our close family friend because i know this secret and i don't say anything i wish he never told me ignorance is truly bliss so there it is will i be there if i said something backstory my wife and i have two kids nine f four meters my wife got pregnant very easily our first kid was even a noops baby she had relatively easy pregnancies comparatively and extremely easy labor comparatively no major complications or anything like that on the other hand my brother and his wife have been trying for years and had to endure medical surgeries for myself and utilize ivf in order to finally get pregnant after spending who knows how much money so when they finally got pregnant they made it a much bigger deal than i would say is typical even for a first baby for a couple for example their baby shower instead of being sort of typical with close friends and family at like someone's house and opening gifts and such was at this very expensive venue with extravagant catering and it was formal attire and they didn't even open presents my wife was involved in the planning for this and it was during this that she started to kind of get annoyed with my sill she would plan certain events and fun typical baby games and it would get shot down by myself and she would basically replace it with her own idea so that whole event left a bit of a sour taste for this whole pregnancy ever since otherwise everyone in our family has been supportive and excited the baby is due at the end of this month so last night my wife received a facebook message thread including my parents and other family from myself that said in order for any of us to see the baby either in the hospital after he's born or later back at home we would need to bring our vaccination records to show that we are up to date on certain vaccinations and have gotten our seasonal flu shot my wife lost it she started saying how completely insane my cell and brother are being and basically is over the pregnancy and doesn't care to meet our nephew while i said that i agree they are being a bit on the extreme side i can sort of understand how they are like extra precautious because of everything they've been through to even get pregnant and in all reality this is probably their one and only chance they can't afford to go through ivf again and micellar's too old it would be high risk anyway my entire family including the kids are all up to date on our shots so it's not like it would be hard to comply we would just need to get our records i also said i can understand in this day and age with the interwax community you never know who has what so i can see being careful around strangers but they should trust family members that we wouldn't put our own family the baby in harm's way but overall i sort of understand why they are being careful and it's no big deal well she took this as me siding with them over her she's been angry with me ever since am i the a edit one while my wife didn't explicitly say it just knowing her well enough i think the reason she's upset isn't because they are asking for vaccination paperwork in general but asking us and my parents we are pretty close we all live like 30 minutes away and see them frequently and at every holiday they watch our kids we watch their dog etc there's always been full trust between us and i think she feels insulted like we are not being trusted i don't know if that changes anything for those of you that said you also asked for shot records did that apply to everyone including close family edit 2 holy cow this blew up since last i checked first of all thanks so much for the comments opinions and advice to address some common questions comments one no sill has no good reason to think we would lie about being vaccinated or anything else for that matter once again we are all really close if anyone in the family was an antivaxxer we would all know and there's no previous issues with trust that has ever existed too no we did not ensure family was up to date on shots when our kids were born i feel like the whole antivax thing wasn't as prevalent at the time maybe it was a while ago don't exactly recall three it is highly unlikely my wife is jealous of the baby shower or attention of the pregnancy she's a total introvert and would rather die than have the type of baby shower myself had it was more the fact that myself rejected all her ideas and basically planned it herself for i probably shot myself in the foot on this one with the title but i didn't really take a side at least i wouldn't consider it that it's not like i said well hon they are right and you are wrong it was more the fact that i wasn't as outraged as my wife about the whole thing that made her think i was taking their side i think so take that for what it's worth five i appreciate the folks that could also see both sides of the coin i feel like that's what i tried to do here maybe i didn't handle it to perfection and i agree it will probably blow over hopefully maybe i'll send an update if anyone is interested edit three just cause it's hilarious that i actually have to address this but no i was not implying that just because the baby is ivf for their one shot that the baby's life is more valuable than a more typical pregnancy baby not quite sure how some folks deduced that i was merely saying that due to those circumstances i could more easily empathize with myself somewhat extreme emo request for vaccination records which is why it didn't bother me as much as it did my wife so as i said in my last post my brother and son got married last weekend everything went perfectly and my mom was on her best behavior just kidding but a guy can dream right i was the best man so i attended the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner my wife decided to stay in the hotel to minimize interaction with my mom my mom skipped the rehearsal when we entered the restaurant for dinner i was chatting with my brother and holding my nephew my mom comes sprinting over and throws her arms around us and screams my baby boys loud enough for everyone in the restaurant to get quiet and stare then my mom grabs my brother and me and drags us to the dinner in a private room thank god she clung to my brother me and my nephew and completely ignored myself for the entire night except for glaring at her every time she dared to speak at her own rehearsal dinner other than that the dinner was relatively uneventful and painfully awkward the next day i get up early to go do best man things as i left my wife reminded me that if i didn't wrangle my mother she would divorce me then kill me before the wedding started my mom apparently approached my wife and told her that she looked like she was pregnant again so she'd better watch what she ate she was quickly pulled away my mom also wailed so loudly during the ceremony that my father actually covered her mouth and shushed her other than that things went okay and everyone seemed relatively pleased with the ceremony during photos my mom kept dragging my brother my nephew and me away for shots she didn't want anyone else in the pictures including still dad or sister and my brother eventually banished her to the cocktail hour this is where things really started to go batshit the seating plan for the reception had my brother and sill at the head table with the wedding party and the parents at another table my mom had been trying to convince my brother to let her sit at the head table for months and he refused imagine my surprise when i walked up to the table to find that my mom had taken my little sister's seat between my brother and me my sister was so excited to be a bridesmaid and my mom essentially kicked her out of the wedding party by making her switch seats i repeatedly told my mom to move but she kept arguing saying things like don't you want to enjoy your mother's company today i haven't seen you in so long and i paid for this wedding and i just want to sit with my baby boys i said no and threatened to call security so she got up and stalked away i thought she was going back to her real seat i was wrong until this point my wife had been stashed away with some sympathetic cousins and was having a great time the bride and groom were just kind of milling around and chatting and at this moment sill and my wife were catching up i wasn't there for this part but from what i heard my mother go storming up to them and first demands to see my children my wife told her that they were with her parents and my mother proceeds to call her family a bunch of damn dirty jews and says she knew my wife was an evil bee trying to steal my money from the start still steps in to defend her and my mother calls her a w and says that the only reason she's letting my brother marry my sill was so my nephew wouldn't have to live as a bastard according to my wife my mother also kept throwing around the term manipulative shrews which my wife and sill both thought was hilarious they started laughing which just pissed my mom off more my brother and i heard the ruckus and ran over to help i've never seen my brother more pee in my entire life he got in between sill and my mom and yelled in her face to get the duck out when she refused to leave he literally threw her over his shoulder and carried her out as this is happening my wife and so are laughing so hard they are sobbing and i'm surprised my mom didn't have a stroke from how loud she was screaming she apparently spent the rest of the night having a tantrum in the parking lot because she refused to leave a couple of my other family members went out to comfort her but she was not allowed back in the wedding went on after the episode and it was actually a lot of fun thankfully sill and my wife had a good sense of humor about it sill said she was actually expecting worse and my wife didn't actually divorce me [Music] [Music] you

Channel: Ask Girl

Views: 20,385

Rating: 4.9139786 out of 5

Keywords: reddit girl, reddit wedding, reddit sil, reddit sister in law, reddit sister, reddit family, reddit, r/ askreddit, r/ girl, r/ wedding, r/ sil, r/ sister in law, r/ sister, r/ family, r/, askreddit girl, askreddit wedding, askreddit sil, askreddit sister, askreddit family, askreddit, reddit secrets

Id: Fo7bi5yxq3c

Length: 16min 14sec (974 seconds)

Published: Tue Sep 01 2020