Siblings of Narcissists, Sociopaths, Psychopaths: What's Your Experience? (r/AskReddit)

siblings of narcissists psychopaths or sociopaths what's your experience my sibling is not a sociopath or psychopath but is narcissistic with extreme anger issues he would intentionally stop arguments slightest response from me would be his excuse to go mental worst was once when he choked me after i tried to defend myself only stopped because i threatened to call the cops later my dad sided with him saying i shouldn't have made my brother angry and that if i did call the cops they'd laugh at me and would do nothing that's idiotic obviously bear in mind my brother was six feet one and athletic while i was a skinny five feet four teenager that was five years younger i'm now an adult and in the military and don't plan on talking to either of them much after i leave needless to say if he ever tries something like that again he'll be lucky if he isn't hospitalized count on it i'm not even totally sure of my older brother's diagnosis but several years ago i found out through his journal that he had an elaborate plan to murder me and had apparently attempted to before but couldn't go through with it his reasoning was mostly because i was mean to him as a child but really he was the one cruel to me the part that really [ __ ] me up is that both my parents knew about his wish to kill me and never said anything to me let us sleep under the same roof they always coddled and treated him differently than me he is severely mentally ill likely a psychopath has been in a mental hospital now for several years i cut contact with my parents as soon as i moved out my narcissistic brother is almost 10 years older than i so i don't remember a lot of the things he did i know the stories though he left home at 16. we did have a relationship as adults but i cut it off realizing that he hadn't changed he's stolen from my family members he's a pathological liar and a con man to say the least we call him commandon he has even lied to his children about having cancer he is a piece of work he has never ever acknowledged anything he's done in fact he acts like none of it ever happened as of now we do not talk i am close to his children i get joy out of family events my brother actually attends because i make him super uncomfortable i also have an older sister who has gaslighted me my entire life i didn't realize it till adulthood when people would point out her behavior to me and question it she's narcissistic in many ways too never sees the error of her own ways i can be around her but i have to keep it limited i finally learned to have boundaries brother was doted on as a child because he was gifted at basketball literally had no consequences growing up and could do whatever he wanted treated me and our parents like absolute crap and they still doted on him while i would get the belt for the most benign and asinine stuff my brother's life is absolute crap right now he has no sense of self-worth and just gets handouts from my parents he is in his late 30s and my parents are giving him money for rent and food he wants everyone to feel sorry for him and expects everything to be handed to him he can't do anything on his own and guilt trips and manipulates my parents into doing whatever it is he needs doing for him or just giving him extra funds he has no incentive to change in his content playing video games all day while my parents just enable his lifestyle at holidays he just talks down to me and tries to make me feel bad about how difficult his life is i could care less about him and have no desire to talk to him until he makes some serious changes in his lifestyle and life choices idk if this counts but my six-year-old brother he was six when this happened once asked my mom if he could have some of her fries she said yes and asked why he replied with so i can kill seagulls she asked why and he replied with so i can bake them and then kill them with rocks my mom also asked why he would do that and he answered because i don't play enough fortnite another time my friend accidentally stepped on my dog's paw and was like oh god i'm so sorry and etc then my brother from the other room yelled i wish i could break the dogs poor he's done other things like talk about how he wouldn't miss me if i died and such i've also had dreams about him killing everyone i know like family pets and friends i have a sibling who used information from subs like ray said benecists and other narcissistic mother blogs and websites to isolate and convince myself and each of my other siblings that our parent was an abusive narcissist they were much older and were able to start on each sibling around the age of 17. eventually each sibling came to the realization of what they were doing and we cut them out but we all suffered pretty seriously at their hands in a lot of ways also this sibling had left a book at one of our places while storing stuff in the book at the top of each page was the name of a person in their life family friends co-workers landlord neighbors etc and a list of the things they could be used for to benefit my sibling the things they like and dislike and methods to use and manipulate the person best i am terrified of this person especially since they work in law enforcement have access to firearms and abuse all sorts of amphetamines and other drugs daily it's interesting really my mom died recently when i called my sister to come down the day before she died she said i thought she was going to die today i'm not disappointed but i can't keep missing work the next day i called her to come to the hospital again as the doctor and i made the decision to take her off the ventilator on the phone she said well can we pull out the tube as soon as i get there because i have plans tonight she also proceeded to ask me for rent money that day as i also live with her the things they say and don't realize how messed up it is is really baffling i was playing with a suitcase while watching tv i was small enough to fit myself in it my brother nearly four and a half years older than me saw what i was doing and asked to zip me up in it after already having learned to never trust him i asked mom to watch us to make sure he didn't do anything stupid he zipped me up inside the suitcase and started carrying it in a shuffle step thump thump thump i heard the sliding door to the enclosed patio open mom started screaming and i could hear her slapping my brother repeatedly the suitcase fell over onto its side with me still in it i managed to pry open the zippers from the inside and got myself out of the suitcase as quickly as possible mom was still slapping at my brother screaming why i was two feet away from being dumped inside a suitcase into the family hot tub he laughed and said that i would have floated what's the big deal so yeah that's what it was like growing up with a sociopath every only child should read comments like these before deciding they got the short end of the stick in life by not having a sibling alive and childhood friend it doesn't always work out that way hopefully most sibling relationships are healthy and happy throughout life but some of them are a lifetime commitment of frustration and misery about which you can do very little my sister has never been diagnosed with narcissism or a personality disorder other than ocd but when we were younger she often enjoyed telling people before i met them that i had a difficult relationship with the truth so that they wouldn't want to be around me i had the reputation of a liar and no friends for most of my pre-teen years and she was popular in our home school group until she left and got into high school after she left i still didn't have friends but neither did she and she blamed me for it during her frequent temper tantrums she would throw things scream cry and threaten me with kitchen knives on a pretty regular basis all of a sudden the year that i turned 17 and she turned 21 the tantrum stopped and she got engaged he moved in with us the tantrums started again and for once i wasn't the target the worst fight they had happened when she caught him looking at a photo of a bikini model which she considered cheating she hit him full force with an open palm and when our mum saw she threatened to kick her out if she hit him again they got married moved out and divorced within a year of him enlisting in the army when i was 10 my mom put a lock on my door because my brother started threatening to kill me and my mom in the night when i was 14 he fixated on my mom and threatened to burn down our house shoot my whole family and steal all the valuables and drive away that same year he was 17. he took our car and ran away from home for two weeks we ended up calling the police on him when he came home the police decided that it would be best if he lived somewhere else so he did as we were cleaning out his room we found hundreds of knives a handgun lighter fluid gasoline and lighters i'm not old enough to block him out of my life he is abusive and autistic and has orderly known as aspergers he shows every warning sign only on a sociopath and he threatens to kill me every day not a blood sibling but my cousin i grew up in the same house with we considered each other brother and sister he committed suicide in 2016 and it wasn't until then i realized how [ __ ] up he was he was abusive to the family pets throwing them across the room constantly said how he's going to end up in prison for killing someone and made comments about how rape isn't rape if the woman isn't screaming and fighting back when i was six to nine he'd throw me into doors and tackle me to the ground choking me memories of that are far and few due to the gaslighting from the rest of my family my sister has dialed down her act a bit after we have all spent a few years out of our aging npd our soul father's house i mostly remember a massive sense of entitlement that simply made no logical sense and would require a great deal of cognitive dissonance to explain but like she would never loan me things cds exe but had no problem walking straight into my room in front of my face to take a bottle of body lotion to use on herself she seemed to have no remorse for what her behavior did to others so long as she got what she wanted out of the deal sometimes she would just do and say mean and spiteful things for no reason i talk to her from time to time while is less of a self-involved sociopath she still is insufferably self-righteous oh god where do i begin she fed my hamster to our cat because i wouldn't let her name it she woke me up when i was sleeping in my mom's bed by punching me and then proceeded to break my index finger with the door when i fought back just because she wants to sleep there that night she also poured bleach over my clothes cause she was mad that i was doing laundry when she needed to honestly there's a whole lot more but those are some of the major stuff my dad is a sociopath he raised me it's very difficult having basic friendships relationships holding a job the way i was raised is extremely unconventional leading me to not react to normal situations as a typical person would not a sibling a cousin when i was eight and my cousin was seven i noticed my dog pug missing one day i only noticed after everything that she wasn't there that morning i was going to ask my best friend to go play hide and seek with me in my hiding spot i could hear my dog whimpering and as i looked for my dog i found her with all of her teeth ripped out and scissors in her right eye after minor surgery she is fine and not to say i'm happy about it she looks hella cute even with a stitched eye i don't know what happened to my cousin but him and his parents were taken out of our lives forever he never got a diagnosis but he's good at deceiving he always just tried to get all the attention cried to get me punished so he could spend more time playing with my playstation i saved my money for myself i ended up being the black sheep my mom constantly threatening to call child protective services if i wouldn't have been so unknowing i would have preferred that he was always sick and he was always the victim so much that they ended up forgetting me at home when they went to my grandparents and didn't realize it until they heard me crying alone at night behind the couch there is a lot of [ __ ] up stuff i'm not including but it wasn't just emotional terror he willfully abused the whole relationship to my family so we started to enstrange one another i confronted him a lot so years later he's on a different route and tries to be himself rather than a victim i still don't want to be around anyone here it burns on my skin to even get near but it's not as bad as being in the situation and having to deal with it haven't spoken to my sister for nearly two years now she has a new child 1.5 years old i'll never meet still get to catch up with my niece when she's with my mother but other than that life has been [ __ ] excellent not having to put up with the constant drama that spews forth from that [ __ ] whoever says you can't choose family you're wrong family is for who you care about [ __ ] the rest it's always difficult to share my problems with them because they also had that same problem at some stage of their life and it was much harder for them than that is for me apparently mom narcissist dad alcoholic possible narc self-centered card brother golden child me family scapegoat still working through the bs and healing at age 57 it can be done my daughter was hit by a drunk driver when she was 12 and nearly died she was in a coma for two weeks and i was there all day every day except to go home to shower and change my sister decided that when i was at the hospital was the perfect time for her and her druggy girlfriend to jimmy the sliding door off the track break in and steal everything she could find jewelry my camera and yes my daughter's piggy bank the [ __ ] told the piggy bank from a comatose kid growing up she had total control of my life she criticized what i wore listen to hate everything if i was different i was weird if i liked what she liked then i was copying her she tried to scare me multiple times with guns and knives claiming she never would actually hurt me but she would hold up a samurai sword to my throat and tell me if i moved i died eventually she had that kid when she was 19 and i was 16 and for a year she was a good mother and then decided she didn't want to be a mom anymore i've seen her ruin countless people's lives spanning from just stringing them along to drowning their bank accounts to contributing to them being put in jail for domestic abuse she's still waiting for trial on her charge i despise her and she is not family to me i had so many issues growing up that only stemmed from things she did to me and i don't want to see my niece grow up like that my parents are doing a wonderful job of raising her but she doesn't understand why mommy isn't there and it breaks my heart there are probably some narcissists commenting under this post pretending to be the sibling my sister is way too into herself she has no real friends but she has like 60 000 instagram followers she literally just spends her money on new clothes and the newest iphone to take selfies and when i say she has no real friends i really mean it she never leaves the house never had a job dropped out of high school but she thinks she's the greatest thing god graced this planet with i don't really talk to her because anytime i try she's just taking pictures of herself with different outfits it's really annoying i don't know why my parents condone finance this lifestyle she gets it from my mom she's kind of the same way when she threw a cup of hot tea at my face because i refused to show her something on the computer all the time when she yelled at me for over an hour because i was really sick and had thrown up all over the bathroom sink the same bathroom she had just cleaned i stopped speaking with her over seven years ago older brother highly narcissistic same with my mother verbally cruel and manipulative and always project blame onto others never acknowledging their own behavior i do not speak with either over them my brother for over five years and my mother for over a year you feel your life isn't your own everything will revolve around them constantly causing drama and trouble sister who would steal from you never-ending drama tried to steal my boyfriend repeatedly actually broke into one sister's house and robbed her can't tell the truth ever disowned her about 10 years ago after her awful treatment of terminally ill mother pea since then [Music] you

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Id: 7iuLkW7fF3U

Length: 18min 19sec (1099 seconds)

Published: Sun Aug 16 2020