SELFIE MAN - A Horror Movie So Bad It Hurts

there isn't a single timeline where the movie selfie man or selfie from hell is good not a single timeline I'm sure there's a timeline where Hitler was a good guy and became a great artist but not for selfie man nope this movie is so bad that it deserves not a single timeline where it's good mainly because it's called selfie man and how can you ever make a good movie and name it selfie man it's not possible because the title spells it out immediately you know it's gonna be a garbage fire just because it's called selfie man or selfie from hell I'm not sure which title it is originally it was called selfie from hell but they changed it to selfie man for the youtube version I'm not sure why but if you look up selfie man it's the same movie maybe the word hell was just too adult for YouTube who knows nobody is going to watch selfie man expecting a quality piece of cinema I'm sorry it was put up on YouTube movies on September 3rd 2019 and it has two likes two likes I mean I'm kind of surprised they are dislikes but damn and it has two comments the first comment was what's up guys - literally nobody and the second comment is damn no comments and comments is spelled with a Z because that's the type of person that spends their time watching the movie called selfie man in the trailer they show some glowing reviews one of which says creepiest spine-tingling flick by the prestigious star chasm if you go to their website they describe themselves as an entertainment celebrity pop culture and true crime website with a passion for reality television what can we say we love a good story apparently not because you like this movie and their name is star chasm which leads me to believe that they're being sarcastic with this review and I'm not even sure what spine-tingling means but okay and then there's a film that will make you think twice about being so damn vain by eye horror but if you go to their website it's less of a review and more of a hey this thing exists thanks John Squires I'm sure nobody ever read this except for me so you're welcome for the one reader so I guess now we're at the part when we talk about the movie great let me get the only thing I liked about this movie out of the way it's 75 minutes long yeah it's it's got a pretty short runtime so thank God for that there are three main characters in this film there's Julia Hannah and Trevor so there's not a whole lot to digest thank [ __ ] so the movie immediately starts with a really bad YouTube video so that's kind of interesting apparently the character Julia is a youtuber in this movie I guess she's kind of like a female Shane Dawson you know she talks about conspiracies and the dark web and all that stuff but this time she crossed the line by talking about a selfie from Hell you know if you take a certain amount of selfies you'll die you shouldn't talk about that or the dark web is gonna come after you it's so corny you know she puts these red contacts and she's like Southie somehow and I almost thought that this was going to be like one of those spoof movies you know kind of making fun of the horror genre like a parody type thing but it's not so that was kind of a letdown so then were introduced to Hanna Julia's cousin she goes to pick up Julia and she's acting a little bit strange she's looking at her phone and being all weird about it Hannah's like oh let's take a selfie I get it because the movie is called selfie from hell or a selfie man I'm not sure which one I like more I'm pretty sure salving man is worse but not by much hannah tries to take a selfie and Julia's like now don't do it that's evil [Music] so that's your first indicator that selfies are bad for whatever reason so they get to Hannah's house Julia goes upstairs and she's crying and looking at her phone obviously something's going wrong but strangely one of her tears falls like horizontally across her face you would assume that this would be explained later but it isn't it just kind of happens to be creepy so Hannah's downstairs making tea and Julia's upstairs taking selfies of herself and then she starts recording herself like vlogging style and then someone comes and grabs her which is weird because I thought it was supposed to happen when you're taking a selfie it's not really the same thing I mean maybe in this world a selfie is also recording yourself who knows nothing is really explained in this movie I'm just gonna put that out there right now and it's really [ __ ] stupid Hannah here's Julia screams so she runs upstairs and Julia is laying on the ground passed out so who was that that was behind her oh my god that must have been the selfie man even though she was recording herself but let's let's just ignore that so Julia is asleep now and she stays asleep for the remainder of the film we're what seven minutes in and that was basically all she does in the entire movie now she's just asleep so Hannah calls a doctor the doctor comes and takes a look at Julia and he's like oh she has an infection and just let her rest and she'll be fine I'll give him antibiotics she needs to take one every eight hours Yes Doctor sounds good I'll be here for Hannah I'll make sure she gets her medicine just kidding I won't give it to her once in the entire movie she's got a bad infection what kind of infection where is it can you be any more specific please that might help a little bit just an infection in her entire body she's just an infection I guess okay okay okay the rest of the movie just follows around Hannah so selfie man does this thing where he sends like gibberish to people over text and it has the number 13 in it because in this movie if you take 13 selfies you die and that's as far as the explanation goes so selfie man sends a gibberish text to Hannah using Julia's phone and then Hana's like oh she must be awake now so she goes upstairs and she's still asleep which is like oh my goodness who did that who sent that text that's weird but then just kind of forgets about it so she's outside reading a book and she receives a voice memo text thing from Julia and again it's a bunch of gibberish but this time you can hear it so that hand is like oh now something really weird is happening she goes up to see Julia and surprise surprise she's still asleep near the beginning of the movie Julia was trying to access this weird like darknet website using her phone Hannah being a weird I was snooping on her and saw dot onion at the end not to mention Hannah was snooping on Julia's phone while she was driving and somehow was able to remember the URL like house knew peak in this [ __ ] be and keep your eyes on the road you're gonna kill yourself before selfie man can ruin the plot of this masterpiece so Hannah thinks that Julia's phone is hacked somehow so she Google's dot onion and she finds out that it's all about the dark web I'm entering the exact same URL that Hannah entered in her computer to see where it goes cuz I'm just curious and it leads nowhere cool so she does all this stuff to try and access dark web to try and find out what's going on with Julia's phone so Hannah goes to sleep there's this random shot of like the powerlines outside I'm guessing to like signal that something is headed her way via the internet or something it was very weird so Hannah gets another video message while she's sleeping and it's of Julia sleeping but what if Hannah just didn't wake up you know what if she didn't look at her phone so she goes to check on Julia she finds that the windows in Julia's room are open she goes downstairs and oh my god the front door is open so what did someone just come inside to open Julia's windows and to send a video message of her sleeping to Hannah to scare her is that the idea Hannah searches around downstairs and finds nothing except for the windows open because this intruder just really wants to you know make them cold and how he was able to go inside and open the windows and all this stuff without Hanan hearing when she was asleep for like literally one second the next day hannah video messages her friend Trevor who's this computer programmer and it looks like this is probably like mid-afternoon she's already you know she's showered she has makeup on she didn't check on her friend who's been asleep for like what 48 hours at this point with an unknown infection like they could be dead in your bed so then Hanna goes to Julia's Channel and watches her videos apparently Julia's channel is called Julia's world so I'm gonna look that up just to see if it really exists and it turns out that there's 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 there are a lot of channels called Julia's world so for whatever reason Hannah thinks that this video that Julia was making about the darknet is what led her to have this infection I'm not sure how she made that connection but uh whatever so then Hannah's like well we're selfie from Hell part 2 you know she's supposed to have uploaded part 2 but it's not there that's weird how she would have made that correlation between what's happening with her phone and Julia's weird infection and her youtube channel makes no sense to me so she looks her up online and finds out that Wow turns out she's dead it was posted all over the internet that julia lange is a dead person how the hell did hannah not know this if Julia Lange was dead you would assume that her cousin would be one of the first people to learn about this I guess not the bizarre death of Julia Lange so does that mean that this person that came to visit her is just like a ghost or did she die when she was upstairs recording herself please explain something to me movie so then she finds this video of Julia dead online and she watches it and she just like looks at the camera and it's just like oh my god it's so scary the Hanny goes to Julia's room and she's like why cap Julia and she's not waking up so Hana tries to access Julia's computer but she can't login as Julia so she logs in as a guest and then she looks up Julia Lang again on this computer and finds these dead images a second time so apparently she's dead but she's not dead because she's in bed with an infection what's going on what's happening oh my god the mystery so Hana puts her hand on Julia's face takes it away and then it has blood all over it I don't know what this means like is she seeing things is Julia actually dead as a corpse in her bed and she's just not seeing it is there some sort of ghost doing this what's happening what is happening so she goes to wash your hands and oh my god there's no blood on my hand wait what why it's just like spooky stuff just to be spooky so Hannah talks to Trevor and she's like there's something wrong with her in and I I don't know what but I think it's got something to do with her darknet research but I must have written down the numbers wrong I tried googling it and I and I couldn't find it I wrote it down maybe you could have a look at each other's like oh you can't go back to the same website because there's no search engines in the dark web so then hands like okay fine since you can't help me I'm leaving and then he's like oh [ __ ] I want to get my dick wet but she's leaving what can I do so for whatever reason this weirdo Trevor has access to a chatroom that can give access to the darknet that's kind of weird so are you telling me this guy has gotten involved with the darknet and for what reason I guess she just doesn't care to know the first chatroom she tries has a gatekeeper whatever that means and it's so cheesy it shows this woman's face and she's like oh what's your name wrong answer what's this wrong answer what is your doctor's to solve steal makeup it's basically just a way to try and get her to give her personal information away and she falls for it because Hana is the dumbest person on earth at the bottom of the email Trevor's like all but just ignore the ones with the gatekeepers so then why did he include the chat rooms with the gatekeepers so she tries all these different chat rooms and eventually she gives her email away to a random person online because that's what you always want to do when you're perusing the internet especially the dark web he then emails her she clicks on the link that they send her like an idiot a complete [ __ ] like have you ever used a computer in your life like how the [ __ ] I'm it's it's mind-boggling how her computer isn't already like riddled with malware is beyond me Trevor even told her not to give away any personal information and she's like okay whatever I'll just give him my stuff here's my email this dark web guy then calls her and he tells her that Julia's boyfriend is dead her boyfriend is done but that's kind of weird because hannah was on the computer and it said that she was already dead so is she not dead now was that just to scare people I'm so confused was the selfie man just like altering Hannah's perception of the Internet I don't know what's going on so Hanna tries to call Julia's boyfriend's cell phone hi my name is Hanna I was just wondering if I could speak to mark excuse me they don't say that he's missing but she acts like she has found out that he was dead Hanna looks up and Julia is awake suddenly it's so stupid honestly this part just made me laugh look at her just sitting there smiling I know it's supposed to be creepy but it's so dumb why is she awake all of a sudden then she just goes back to sleep so Trevor randomly calls her at this exact moment so Hanna answers she's like I need you to come over you would assume Hanna would call the police if she had this guy over the darknet threatening her you know you'd assume that she would want some real security around her especially if Julia is acting really weird so Trevor comes over and now he decides to tell Hanna about the black rooms and the red rooms you would assume that he would tell her this before you know sending the email because this is kind of crucial information so apparently a red broom is when a bunch of people on the darknet sit around and watch something horrible happen to someone and the black room is when you participate in something horrible that's happening that the people in the red rooms are watching online and apparently Julia entered a black room by accident Trevor hacks into Julia's computer and they find the video selfie from Hell part 2 oh my goodness spooky so in this video Julia's like oh well I did some digging and it led me to the darknet I met this guy named fear-eater and it turns out that he's a bad guy I shouldn't have trusted him she says I shouldn't have trusted someone named fear-eater and yeah I'm just gonna say it fear-eater that's cringe and come on what are the odds Julia and Hana just happened to stumble across the same exact person on the darknet what exactly what he was doing yeah no [ __ ] you meet some sketchy ass guy in fear eater and he gives you a link to something oh I wonder if we should click on it these people are so stupid it's just a seven-year-old would have more common sense than these adults it's laughable I have to board a flight I'm going to meet him she says yeah that's what you should do don't go to the police don't try and get protection for yourself she says oh he promised he'd help save mark like him what why would you believe this guy I'm baffled how stupid Julia is I'm afraid I can trust him no [ __ ] no [ __ ] you dumb [ __ ] okay this next part is so stupid and then she says if you ever find yourself in a black room no matter what do not watch all 13 selfies I think she misspoke I think she meant to say do not take 13 selfies because why would you watch all 13 selfies I'm very confused by that if you take the 13 selfies and your screen cracks then that means you're in trouble [Music] that means that the selfie man is after you but it only happens if you get invited to a black room and you take 13 selfies in your screen cracks it's very important for all those steps to be taken why does this happen nobody [ __ ] knows there's little e0 explanation to why this happens I guess 13 is an evil number because of Friday the 13th that's the only real connection I can make to it so trevor spends the night to Hannah's place Hannah wakes up in the middle of the night to see Julia floating above her so trevor is sleeping downstairs but somehow he gets to Hannah's room and like one second he hears her scream and he's instantly in the room he instantly gets there Trevor was probably just like chillin outside of a room this whole time you know hoping that she was like text him and be like come in I wanna snuggle because he's so thirsty so they finally bring Julia to the emergency room even though she was practically in a coma this whole time and apparently her organs were failing her organs they're failing so thank God she did this creepy [ __ ] she'd be dead I mean according to the internet she already is dead but I don't know what's going on anymore they say that she probably won't make it till the morning well maybe if Hanna was at least 1% responsible they should have brought her to the emergency room right away obviously they need a second opinion that this weird-ass doctor just says oh she has an infection okay bye so then Trevor's like oh do you want to go in and say goodbye to your cousin that's dying and she probably won't make it till the morning and Hannah's like lolno she probably won't make it to the morning you think I care about her I just let her sit in my bed for like three days straight when she was clearly not feeling well Hannah then tells Trevor that he has to leave for whatever reason but why though why would you want to leave you would assume you'd want some sort of protection right now if all this crazy [ __ ] is happening and someone over the darknet is doing weird [ __ ] I need to be alone right now because the movie needs me to be alone right now like there's literally no other reason obviously she would want to be with someone right now why would she ask him to leave after what just happened especially if he's the only person with any sort of knowledge about the darknet whoever wrote this script is very bad oh yeah it's the same person that directed the movie makes sense now so fear-eater calls her again he asks for her address and promises not to hurt her even though he didn't even need her address because he breaks into her place was he just asking to see if she would give it to him and for whatever reason she still doesn't call the police Hannah just does not like the police my life's in danger oh [ __ ] but yeah the police oh no probably not so she accidentally pour sugar on the ground and draws a smiley into it so it's stupid and then the selfie ghost thing makes it into a frown and then she looks at it again and it's an arrow and she looks where the arrow is pointing and oh my god it's fury derp he's breaking into my place thanks selfie man for for showing me the direction where he was breaking in very helpful why would the ghost do this was that Julia's ghost doing that I don't know she escapes into the basement and then Julia pops up on a screen and tells her to run so I guess it was Julia's goes Julia is dead then great Hannah gets tased this is a really powerful taser and it knocks her out so she wakes up and she's tied up fear-eater starts taking selfies of Hannah even though they aren't technically selfies because he's taking them but who knows the real rules apparently someone else can take yourself is for you and it can be a recording you can record yourself and that counts as a selfie too as long as there's 13 of them if you take 13 you die first for whatever reason it comes across so silly when fear-eaters describing this selfie man guy he's like sometimes it takes some days other times just hours before he comes for you I do know that it gets you immediately once you've taken 13 selfies so is he gonna kill you anyway do you not have to take the selfies or do the selfie just like speed up the process you know you take 13 of them and then he gets you immediately but if you don't take 13 then he just kind of takes his time you know then he gets you in a couple hours or a couple days that makes no [ __ ] sense Sophie reader explains to Hannah that when he found out about selfie man he searched lots of forums to try and find the black room featuring the cursed selfies when I finally found the black room even I was too afraid to look at all the pictures so when Julia said don't watch the selfies earlier did she actually mean don't watch the selfies is it just like a live stream of 13 selfies on loop is that what fear-eater showed Hannah earlier there aren't any concrete rules you know it's so frustrating so Trevor being the weird of that he is you know he decides to break into Hanna's place and Wow it just happened that she was in a really dire situation and he got there just in time to tase fear-eater oh thanks Trevor even though you're creepy as [ __ ] what if fear-eater wasn't even there that means you would have just broken into her place and she would have been like what the [ __ ] I guess he just really wants to get laid was he just really concerned about her so he wanted to freak her out even more by breaking in we have to search researching for years he must know something so then Trevor's like oh my god it's not a server this whole thing is running on a cell phone Trevor explains that he watched the selfies because he had to find out what was going on and whose selfies are they I can't believe I'm trying to make sense I have a movie based around a ghost that kills you if you look at selfies or take them or what's a stupid premise I can't believe this exists what they triangulate the cell phone and then they go to that location and it's in this dark creepy warehouse with no lights because it's always got to be in a dark creepy warehouse with no lights so they look around for a while and eventually they find a photo album and a video camera on this video camera it's this doctor and he's talking to this patient who was once a serial killer and apparently he's catatonic but then he rarely wakes up and he starts doing all this ghost [ __ ] fling him around the room and the camera goes crazy so who is that was that selfie man was that theatre I guess we'll never know it's all a mystery in this photo album there's a bunch of selfies of this goth dude with a bunch of people I'm guessing that's the serial killer guy I don't know so they finally get to the location of the cell phone Trevor calls the number and they hear it up in the ceiling and they're like what the hell and then a body falls from the ceiling it's a Hanged Man so someone or some thing stuffed him and his cellphone up in the ceiling so did he hang himself first and then the selfie man stuffed him up there did someone force him to hang himself was fear-eater involved in this at all is this goth guide the selfie man like was this how it all started because he took 13 selfies with these random people I'm just trying so hard to put these pieces together in my mind because this movie doesn't help me at all and how did the body fall from the ceiling did the phone vibration make it fall so stupid so Hanna touches the hangman's lips and she's like oh my god his lips are wet he must have died pretty recently so then the selfie man ghost comes out of nowhere and attacks Hanna it's really really bad CGI it's just it's so it's so terrible and in terms of like oh my god who attacked Hanna so then he starts taking selfies of himself to find the selfie man but how does Trevor know to take selfies of himself to find the selfie man Hanna never told him this he did watch his Julia's YouTube video where she's like well don't look at the 13 selfies but she didn't say anything about taking 13 selfies maybe he overheard fear-eater talking about it I don't know so then Hanna's like oh I just woke up and I somehow survived that attack so what I'm gonna immediately do when I wake up is take a selfie oh my god it's so idiotic like why don't you try to escape run away why are you taking a selfie what sudden the hanged man wakes up randomly he uses the force basically to pull Trevor towards him and he starts choking Trevor Hanna runs up and tries to free him the hangman's like okay I guess I'll start choking you now so he lets go Trevor and starts choking Hanna the hangman lets go of her at the last second and then just goes back to his normal dead self okay then why is the selfie man not killing them she took the 13th selfie what's with all this foreplay I don't understand and then there's this random scene of Julia and Hanna at a picnic apparently it's a dream but it's very confusing for the viewer because the last time you saw Hanna she wasn't asleep so Trevor comes out nowhere Trevor's just like strolling by randomly and he's like oh hey so he walks up and and they have a kiss and then he turns into the hangman and then we get an awful voiceover that's like you know where he paused to the other side you could not be saved but if he's pulled you to the other side doesn't the other side indicate death so if you're already dead then how will it be a long and painful death does it just keep like reincarnating you does just keep bringing you back to life and killing you over and over like you did with the hangman I guess that would kind of be a long and painful deaths you know plural I don't know what else they could mean by that but okay that okay so after watching the movie twice which sucked already I think I finally understand what's going on kind of so there's this random serial killer that they show at the end in the videotape I'm assuming he's the hangman and I'm assuming he's the guy in the photo album and he took selfies with the people that he murdered and there's 13 of them and then he killed himself and so he became the selfie man that made so if you take 13 selfies or look at the selfies or record yourself there's really no concrete rules but if you do this then he will come out of nowhere and kill you but it's very important that you go to the darknet and go into a black room and then your your phone screen cracks it's very important for all these steps that be taken speaking of creepy stuff you can go to alien clothing comm because we got some really interesting and creepy clothing over there that you might like and thank you to all my patrons for keeping this channel alive I love you guys so much if you guys know of any other really awful horror movies that I should review put them in the comment section down below and I might check it out thank you so much for watching and I'll see you in the next one [Music]

Channel: Elvis The Alien

Views: 3,886,762

Rating: 4.9514041 out of 5

Keywords: selfieman, selfie man, selfie from hell, selfie from hell review, selfie man review, movie review, elvis the alien, elvisthealien

Id: UgOKychqL80

Length: 28min 17sec (1697 seconds)

Published: Sat Feb 01 2020