r/Internet_funeral | try jumping

again children wake me up inside [Music] hello friends welcome back to mk my name is jack the snake did smith today we shall enjoy some internet funerals let's cry coming to an abandoned toys r us near you it's connect crab the original vertical crab game first person to have no fingers loses the fun may end but that doesn't mean the trauma does warning on delete undeleting all mail and files is an unstable operation and cannot be undone are you sure well that sounds a bit uh comfortable so i'm gonna select an i'm i'm gonna select no oh what a lovely artistic pixelated image of a cloud my it's reminds me of a certain vegetable oh what's this context new york city after the superheroes failure oh dear by the looks of those massive white clouds the villains did it ah don't mind this happy chicken just really trying their best to make sure their co-workers aren't put on the menu anymore so cyclops tell us how exactly were you late to school today honestly a bundle of rocks and pebbles just sprouted tiny legs and started to salsa over my forehead and i worry for the first time that i might be losing my grip that in the excessive drugs and alcohol but you know it's one of the other welcome dear friend we haven't seen you for a long time have you already forgotten me i'll never forget you will you go with me don't note that was not a question well you're absolutely a carbon copy of my paralysis demon but that tree has a rainbow next to it so i guess so gentlemen it is with great pleasure to inform you that today is friday oh yes praise be to our lord and savior rebecca black like it down hey hey human hey look look a little straight out there oh look hey hey this is you at least if you're feeling full you're feeling something remember kids don't feel depressed otherwise you'll look like this guy to everyone and if you're feeling sad then you might look like this guy to everyone so you know don't feel sad otherwise you'll look sad and that'll be sad and so you're worried that you'll look sad in front of everyone and so you'll be having this constant like identity crisis so just don't be sad okay so you never have to worry about looking sad and making people think you know less than pitiful of you oh well there's a lot of things going on these days here the human world out there looks just absolutely chaotic oh let's lift our heads out of the water and just see for a second okay just uh okay evolving feet was a mistake [Music] so anyway here's my old haunted photo that i have in my basement just a real friendly girl's leaving me a little message hello and bye either way greetings are not something you can prepare for oh there i go wetting myself in fear again you are not what you wanted to be when you grow up this much is certain okay i get your attempt to be deep and somewhat cynical here but when i was a little boy i wanted to be a dragon so i'm honestly glad i haven't developed into a slight furry ah here we are in phil's head wait hey boys and girls food for thought maybe this world is another planet's health please if this was another planet's hell then why do i feel a slight satisfaction after i poop checkmate home it's where the heart is it's where many hearts are the hearts are here eternal forever frozen in the time of patchwork the stitching immortalizes them so now they're here forever they can't go and they will stay i never truly lost the mother you never truly lost us we're here we're here for you always not forget let's play roger rabbit can you help me go away you horrid man today's game is not sponsored by context now if we observe this plumbing simulator we will see a chair holding itself at the unsuspecting mario notice how the player purposely rotates mario's head to the other side of the screen the player wishes for mario to be unaware of this incoming projectile the player wishes to witness the pain and suffering upon mario's skull the player is a psychopath meanwhile then the cult of people who take opposite day too seriously harry we must burn more buildings 14 year old child you'd likely had a crush on in primary school says elegantly who you are becoming is more important than who you have been in the name of the moon wazowski i'll punish you oh no the true forms of angels have approached jesus christ was defeated an interview was performed to assess barry johnson's psychological state considering the stage is this background image they are clearly in a very healthy stable state welcome take a rest after this weary journey just mind the spikes sorry look i didn't yes i it is a weed i haven't look i haven't had time to go get some weed killer okay i've been very busy this this island doesn't levitate on its own fruit will you know he's watching with too many eyes leave or stay please don't leave i'm so lonely i i can't actually blink warning blue screen oh your files are exactly where you left them oh thank goodness important notice from the scarful council public information from the 32nd of january 1973 it will be no longer legal whatever you do don't don't be one of those people who mistakes doing for not doing or you could face a fine for more information please reread this poster see middle image to comprehend your reaction hold up hold up turkey legs inside bethlehem here's their subtle joke to the saints congratulations you have made it to the end of the back rooms we have been scanning your brain activity this entire time and have saved all useful and very meaningful moments of your life as wonderful books and blu-rays that you can watch on over as you spend your eternities in here please select from apologies we were unable to scan and source any substantial content please stand by in the corner for eternity as we wait upon our next customer and remember children god's love has limits look you know i'm i'm not really comfortable with the way eldon ring does this part of the game it just feels like for games you know this has some serious lore that they don't take themselves very seriously snake life is worth living even if it hurts you okay but that doesn't explain why you bit me i'm just singing god it's hold on i'm still getting this barbecue going and your meat is better fresh why hello there do it close enough how are you feeling today nothing brings me pleasure any longer oh so that's why they don't let you speak english on the show we now return to your common stage of the human by experience it out loud i see mazda's trying a new tactic the all used mazda323 better men than you have died for less you're so afraid of losing them meanwhile you're losing yourself like it's no big deal look at you your little existential crisis but cow it wasn't a bad car okay uh the map says we're just gonna turn right at the giant faceless mask clearly not over a breakup which i don't see oh yeah there it is yeah wow okay that is wow severely self-loathing and then after that we're gonna get a ferry across this river system that uh look i don't well what is this map even you know denman take quality presents the latest in non-gmo product we don't know what the hell is in here no clue at all on special for some sort of price again we don't know we just we throw it at the wall and sometimes it sticks oh no he's not breathing that's because he's a skeleton don't say beyonce that's not gonna save the skill you got first aid training you legally have to no i don't that's not how that works are you refusing to save a man's life it is a 2d pixel image this hey listen no you listen say what you want fellas in the future girls will only date guys with big onion farms in real life right yeah no no no online online right no they're cute but they're also stuck in there until they die it's only when they're going to be served that they get out as what you're saying is they do get freed eventually ah suck it i see it on the positive side of things yeah but they get eaten right positive side of things the wall street journal has released its annual list of the top 10 places to live in the united states sorry bub wrong planet so you want to take a left at venus that'll get you there oh thank you coach stranger i talked so you could scream oh thanks i'm you know i'm good i have nothing to really scream i pooped so you could diarrhea oh well seek i know that i'm thankful for men i well bad curry cue card duration approximately five seconds q after what all players make oral consonant sounds grunts hacks and snort like what would result from trying to recite the sounds of the alphabet minus the vowels backwards at a speed faster than possible pianism so to analyze this after someone says what we are for five seconds to race through the alphabet backwards very quietly along with other grunts hacks and snorts um we will attempt this [Music] nailed it yep that was live you will see such pretty things at my mirror store that's right every mirror you look at you'll see nothing but beauty that's because you are beautiful this is a raw fish converter how it works is you put in the raw fish and out comes god and ramsay shouting at you about the quality of your food alternatively you could put that goated rebzy in here and out comes a fish my asking price is fifty thousand dollars reality is that which when you start believing in it doesn't go away by philip kadiq so what you're saying is when i no longer see my friend they are no longer real huzzah by closing my eyes i can make everything disappear i truly am a wizard your seat remains vacant well yeah i would have saw the table like that why would i want to sit on a chair when it's on the table still that's just silly what makes you happy i don't remember wow you must really love goldfish actually that's been proven wrong that goldfish actually do have retentive memories yes but we need to end this on something funny because otherwise it just looks depressing and you know then we're just kind of standing here facing away from you with something over my shoulder what even is that it's it's a goldfish there you go thank you for purchasing from the post office here is your receipt if i'm the architect of my sadness then why can't i find the exit door help me please it's not safe to turn off your computer because you didn't like this video yet so you gotta do that this is totally wrong this is not a youtube video anymore this is actually a computer warning an irregularity has been detected please turn the power off wait for 10 seconds and then turn the power on again do not worry these little monkeys will not feel a thing their developing sentience will cause no harm or guilt to you and they recognized existence to ensure continuous quality fun gameplay oh look it's me reading half these memes sirius desperately needing to be taken seriously text superseded by bright unnecessarily wholesome and happy energy yeah it's not so swimple is it get it because there's a castle there sidewalk ends in case it somehow isn't clear enough you know it's not like it just magically goes underground nope it it ends is this just in life slug reaction [Music] yeah wow that's um cool this has been a live slug reaction oh i don't know what to think of this one eddie smurfy no thank you welcome to spiritual computing how to pursue your spiritual path on your computer yes there was a genuine market for this at the time we thought computers could be taken in a spiritual sense my dead eyes stare into yours you witness me from your bedroom window i make my way down the hill a chill in your bones a crunch in my step i reach your door you hear me breathing into your ears i've got a delivery for um steve yeah i'm just gonna leave it at the door here mate if you could you know just give me the old five stars i really appreciate it thank you have a good night welcome to the latest gaming challenge of this generation simply exist push start now computer engineers have discovered this bold new strategy to defeating ai chest bots oh pepe you silly little goosey froggy goose looks like some of your pixels are dead besides we've already had supper no this isn't time for second supper put the knives down you're not getting another slice of cheesecake come on do it no i'd rather not go in there anymore just put just put in one finger this time i promise they won't bite they're just humans it's okay attachment remember to check for viruses observe as we see stan hiding so they can't tickle him anymore right okay so wait where's he hiding now at just about a 10 minute walk hey is that a feather in your hand i'm sorry steve but you've seen too much i'm going to have to tickle you now now it's time to play which version of myself will i be today oh looks like we pulled out the black sheen it's time for your favorite personality folks the one who causes all the drama here's billy the traitor honestly it's the ones who are the most trustworthy that you shouldn't trust because you can never trust that when they're suddenly gonna be untrustworthy hmm yes this is perfectly unacceptable crust but at least you're dead ah i see we're at the day and age where i can't tell if this is just some random pixel art or a genuine nft either way screenshot well my wizardry apes that is the end of today's video thank you as always for watching remember if you liked your time here today then make sure you leave a like on this video and subscribe to the channel if you'd like to see more stuff on the daily anyway that has been me my name has been jack you've been a wonderful snack and i look forward to seeing you all again very very soon but until then bye bye

Channel: EmKay

Views: 173,306

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, r/ top posts, top posts, top posts of all time, reddit top posts, 100% True stories, reddit true stories, top all time, reddit posts, reddit stories, ask reddit, funny reddit, emkay, memes, Internet_funeral

Id: fc7kV-aTfGQ

Length: 14min 50sec (890 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 08 2022