Ricky Gervais Funniest Talk Show Moments

see I just I just feel like I'm I'm not long for this world oh well yeah mine used to say that my nan said that for about 20 years she used to say I won't see Christmas I see was right eventually yes eventually yes yeah so don't worry about it anyway I don't care okay now don't worry about being dead so well I mean you don't know about it that's the best thing about being dead you don't know about it's like being stupid it's only painful for others so I don't care I don't care I don't in three Tom Hanks movies Toy Story one two and three he got a job painting the weapons mr. research establishment in England as they were going in this store policeman with his home on had to check underneath with it you know the stick on the mirror yet there's no grenade and as he was doing that his helmet fell off and 20 cigarettes fell out on the floor and the policeman just being nice to my brother said I bet you've always wondered what we keep under our helmets and my brother went I knew it wasn't brains I'm not trying to ruin their night I'm making jokes you know and also I'll do it about things they've done not you know not other things they can't help so I you know I think I'm fair I know you know I mean no no you're not you're not making fun of a way they were they look rather I wouldn't come out and go oh look it's a ginger Frankenstein unfortunately oh you've got son well no brilliant yeah I bought this myself you have to buy you own a baby for you that's a food you want that's a pay on the one from you what we should do is show you a game it's a it's called Oh captioned my caption and you'll look at a photo and then you'll give us a caption for that photo based on what the what you see yeah Wow is the kid signs the baby touch my toys and you die okay look at the kid on the left yeah is these signalling to the police these don't want her face for vases they just married it look at look at who's she's saying what have I done yeah oh wow mom when can we afford a scarecrow [Laughter] [Applause] I'll go they making bacon the town in Minnesota has canceled plans to change the name of a street called stoner Avenue it's a weird Street and instead of saying stop all the signs say chill bruh sorry sorry kid yeah you know you still you're not giving them you know they come out they park their cars they've got babysat haven't paid why would you I be mental but if I was you I'd be going thank you so much these people and give it a you know media it was some I mean you know you did you didn't write it and that's but do it like do it like it's Joe do it like you were clever enough to come up with this joke yourself okay you look pumped buffed and cut you I mean you are ready to go thank you when did this happen for God's sakes um it's been a gradual process yeah well what is your goal about 50 years uh-huh started off really small yeah yeah how long have you had the sore throat just a couple of days so you know I had a sore throat and around the holidays when I you and it's what are you yeah mentioning Jane y'all been together for 35 years which is a wonderful amount of time I think I think you and I are topping her are they okay well done Jay yeah did you do we don't know her but Wow exactly yeah if we were out or something I I sort of like lag behind and get Jane by herself with no and I take a picture of her and I tweet Jane with all their friends so here's one you choose of Jane Jane thinking about making new friends does she know you're doing it there's nothing where is he where is he he sees the tweet this Jane thought she'd made a new friend but it was just a shot just found this photo of Jane when she was little [Laughter] giving her a good start yeah well there you go that's what big 30 years jane is looking so happy because her new friend hasn't walked away yet you're 65 this Thursday and that's correct yes you can't use this to a Thursday this is official I got you a bus pass and senior citizens [Applause] name three things you can cover with chocolate cake yourself someone else what is the worst thing about getting older when I get up in the morning I have to walk down stairs like that till they fall out honestly I've got stick back stiff legs I'm losing my hair yeah it's just it's all bad but George it doesn't mean one thing doesn't want that you have to pick one pendulous testicles you'd like to be like an evil supervillain yeah that'd be good what would your power bead you said oh I don't know Ivan 40 thrilled you know that door after college I just I'd be annoying I'm really annoyed just not super you'd be a super annoying yeah anyone that came to bat mom ago you see what I'm doing there yeah eat read no God if you like this would get really sick sorry is not a breakdown available for streaming never seen you so animated that was amazing thank you on Netflix I thought you were giving it up okay I honestly just thought you were seeing this out Wyatt biding the time I was thinking of I wouldn't be long till I was there now you think maybe I should know you've got a second wind to go for it why did you big big star in Finland are you ready yes what do you mean are you really it's probably I don't know why you'd be skeptical why don't know why you'd be here if you're a big star in Finland getting caught in the zipper does that does that mean this is it yeah yeah yeah yes well that that's never happened just one of the advantages of having a very small penis you're a sweetie pie yeah but everyone's sweet when they're little aren't they I mean Hitler was probably cute when he was that age Ricky Gervais says a new game show here on ABC called child support and he really wanted to be here to promote it in person but he's very busy not being here to promote it in person so he made a video he sent a video and I don't know exactly what the nature of the video is sorry person you know I can't be bothered I've seen the show I get the gist of a mom so because Portia and I have been together for 13 years now and I feel like people still ask us if we're gonna have kids and it's like we're not and people would still know they did they ask me that all the time in the press why don't you have children which is a really odd question to ask them and why don't you have children yeah I supposed to ask me for why do you have [Music]

Channel: uwho22

Views: 4,804,397

Rating: 4.9116716 out of 5

Keywords: Ricky Gervais, ellen, conan, ricky gervais golden globes, ricky gervais the office, golden globes, jimmy fallon, david letterman, jimmy kimmel, the office, ricky gervais standup, kimmel, fallon, letterman

Id: -z_hNbXJ_SU

Length: 10min 5sec (605 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 15 2019