r/Iamverybadass Even Demons Are Scared of Me!

welcome to our slash I am very bad ass we're losers on the internet pretend to be tough guys why do people keep telling me I'm so nice I'm promised I'm a whole douchebag I don't like being known as a nice guy shaking my head I just learned basic politeness guess I'll just intentionally start being rude to people why are people so obsessed with the thought of an afterlife why are people so scared of a thought that when you're dead that's it nothingness like turning off a computer that fear is super immature to me I hope you catch the most viral case of herpes and the most violent case of chlamydia then I hope you have to watch your children murdered before your eyes in the most graphic way possible if you and your whole effing family this guy's trying his hardest to sound like a tough guy but I'm gonna be honest with you anyone brave enough to post this type of cringy content on their social media has some balls I fight a guy at a grocery store last night and got arrested shaking my head easily kick his butt and then when I done I pour a jar of mayo on him lo if you're gonna make up an obvious lie at least try to make it somewhat believable who on earth can pour a jar of mayonnaise on anything mayonnaise doesn't really work that way oh sorry you're broke I can't imagine how that feels I make big boy dollars you buy your clothes at Walmart and eat no-name food I bet sad my protein tubs cost $200 a month little man food a thousand gas insurance keep grinding little guy is this guy trying to flex that he spends a thousand dollars on food dude that doesn't make you seem rich it makes you sound overweight I am one such nice guy I tell people I'm not one to piss off no one ever listens you're too nice I could never imagine you angry they say then that day comes I wish someone would record that for me for two reasons so I had proof and so I could see it for myself so I can understand why it's so terrifying at five foot seven I'm not exactly huge but I've seen large buff men coward my angry outbursts maybe it's that Viking Berserker blood CDJ down in the common sums it up nicely translation I get super mad when I lose it fortnight I yell and scream into my headset and I can tell the people on the other end aren't terrified their avatars are so much bigger than mine and we all know their representations of our true selves my guy has a Viking costume on so I'm assuming I'm a Viking descent about a year ago I was rear-ended while at a stop by a female driver going 70 miles per hour both cars including my beloved BMW were completely totaled mangled piles of metal of course I was completely uninjured not even a scratch no soreness or whiplash nothing if you want to be able to laugh off a horrific car accident get in the gym right because I'm sure it has everything to do with your mediocre muscles and nothing to do with the peak of German engineering and car safety science maybe if you want to join the party or you too scared to talk to a so-called 12 year old most people that talk to me don't come back they start running yeah dude the people who run away from you aren't running away for the reasons you think they are the walls of my house are covered in machetes antique meat cleavers functional medieval weapons vintage swords from a variety of wars I have sharpened hay hooks hanging from curtain rods spiked barbarian clubs hanging by the closet Spears behind my bedroom doors with my rifles a shotgun next to my bed and a variety of combat knives tomahawks and hand axes on my dresser I also have a K bar on my hip from the time I get dressed until the time I go to bed when I put it on my nightstand forget the dog but where the owner so to all the ladies out there who are listening to this video how would you respond if you went on a date with a guy and they took you back to this house you walk in the front door and there's literally knives swords spears and axes hanging from the walls and Aleya and literal hooks hanging from the curtain rods like what would you do in that scenario please let me know I would love to hear from you down in the comments because this guy's definitely scary but not in the way that he probably thinks that he's scary I don't effing care for one second who the eff plays with puzzles is Opie and everyone on this thread at being 4 years old or are they all sad having an epic midlife crisis I thought puzzles were for toddlers am I wrong I've noticed a big effing influx of adults playing with toys which is really epping sad and cringy the only toys I play with are my guns and my women then someone replies well this is hilarious quoting it before they delete it and sure sure enough Opie removed the comment with 131 down votes for all of you efforts to know if I haven't introduced you to my girlfriend in person and you send to her a friend request or anything I'll kill you she's my Harley Quinn and I'm her Joker except I'll make your body colorful by turning your insights into your outsides don't f with the real outlaw king hey remember that scene in Joker when the Joker went on social media and made limp-wristed threats to all of his friends yeah me neither so for context on this one Opie's husband quit his friend group because one of them started dating a minor and then one of them sent this to Opie out of the blue and keep in mind Opie hasn't spoken to any of these people hey is this blank this is Brigham one of his friends proudly - now I'm not here to insult you I really don't need to there's nothing funny about getting quick jabs for a quick laugh and getting blocked I respect your right to be your own person however you're starting to encroach of my friends that I dearly care about and their loved ones I've had to deal with a lot of BS these last few years ex became a pedo co-worker got murdered by another I've been laid off and I've lost wonderful friends if I've learned one thing friends are integral to life and the into all means if you dare make any of my friends shed a single undeserved tear I will pull any and all stops to make sure they're protected and if that means evicting a witch I will violence is petty and let's be honest nobody's going to actually follow up on a violent threat but by god I will expose you for every single one of your darkest secrets like a blacklight shown on a hooker den I will make you hated using nothing but the truth I'll tear down your life just by simply showing everyone who you are Oh which I hope one day Bobby opens his eyes and sees that because he's a respected friend and I already feel saddened to know someone in my friend group was ensnared by one of your leech kind don't get me wrong I'm totally cool with us never speaking again after this you don't ever have to see me again just don't mess with my friends I love how this guy threatens to expose Opie so Opie posted on Reddit and gets 12 thousand up votes a piece of garbage Indian at the gas station across the street from Applebee's swung on me because my shirt has an American flag on it apparently making me racist he said f you f you you effing racist threw my drink behind the counter and walked out he followed me and tried to swing on me again he shut the F up real quick when he got a nine-millimeter in his face AB u y'all mother F is gonna learn real quick I'm not playing anymore I'm surprised this was posted on our slash I am very badass and not re sloshed that happened because this is nothing more than a pathetic wish fulfillment fantasy for this next post some kids synthesis a threat to his school don't get hurt tomorrow and I promise you people are going to get hurt tomorrow a bit of a surprise show blank versus blank ain't the main event anymore people will get what they deserve I never wanted this but in all my life I've always had a burning hatred for tyrants people who are followed blindly and abuse everyone who opposes them I will destroy blank and alongside me blank will destroy blank I predict abyss I tried several times to be civil I'm trying to stop them from tearing the speeds apart sometimes you just have to beat someone to a pulp for them to understand I didn't want to show my dark violent side but the blood King will show his face did anybody else notice that this guy has a burning hatred for tyrants yet calls himself the blood King if you ported supplies groceries etc and you don't believe in the Second Amendment you realize you have become my target and I will do what I have to do to keep my family alive and save alright I remember that part of the Second Amendment every United States citizen has a right to shoot their neighbors and steal their food someone says it's a compliment then this guy replies if someone said he looks like science to my face they'd be leaving in a body bag it isn't a compliment it's an insult of the highest order respects goes a long way in my book I don't take flak from anyone a tiger knee to the side of the skull usually solves the problem I've been told that I need to control my temper but I don't give a flip is a tyranny an actual move or is this guy naming his attacks like an anime character I'm curious it's an actual game characters move okay dude a hundred pounds dog is gonna stop me okay I don't want to get too detailed here but let's just say a dog has one weapon its teeth and I've got my whole body not to mention a far higher IQ I can't possibly conceive anyway a small animal wins a one-on-one fight like that then someone replies to his comment if you really feel the need to say this you're likely a a virgin be someone who thinks they can fight after watching UFC once see less than 110 pounds d wannabe gangster e failing school or F all the above why is this guy talking about his IQ dude when a hundred pound Rottweiler is literally ripping the flesh from your body your ability to add two numbers together isn't going to amount to much some people think they can get away with anything they've not met me threatening me with violence as bad as effective as pissing in the wind except it'll blow back on you with devastating results hahaha you hear that everyone this guy is as scary as a we we going peepee for this next conversation people in the comments were discussing a picture of a lesbian couple I'm fine with the girl on the left being a dick cuz whoof but the cutie pie on the right such a waste of good breeding material mental disorder aside that woman needs a real man not some rubber dong then someone replies I really didn't believe scum like you existed absolutely disgusted that someone like you has the freedom to live amongst us the best-case scenario is that you're an insole that never leaves his basement vile Lowell feel free to stop me from living you sjw trash I'll be sitting here waiting with my m1 a scout six out p320 see in my big fat cop - f your corpse when I'm done nothing says I am very badass like admiting you wanna boink a corpse post it on a front door notice during this time with a corona apocalypse if you so much as knock on my door I will take it as a threat and will not hesitate to shoot you in the face I'm probably drunk definitely pissed off and surely bored try me I'm so angry I want to just explode and yell at everyone right now I don't understand how we've fallen into such disarray and it infuriates me think F I've been listening to death metal again lately otherwise I would have gone off the deep end and killed you all before Corona could do any damage if these really are the end times I pray the Cataclysm comes as soon as effing possible I am done with the rats and their rat race once anarchy breaks out game over you will know pain you will see the true face of panic that was our slash I am very badass and if you don't hit that like button then I'm gonna come to your house and punch you in the face

Channel: rSlash

Views: 334,411

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, comedy, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, iamverybadass, r/iamverybadass

Id: CnViHjxp4dM

Length: 14min 24sec (864 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 03 2020