r/Relationships My Girlfriend Wants My $400,000

welcome to our slash relationship advice where op witnesses her mom hit a child with her car when i was 23 i'm now 28 i was engaged to ryan he was 32 at the time and now he's 37. our engagement ended when my stepsister kelly who was 24 at the time begged me to leave him because they loved each other but ryan was too afraid to break up with me because he didn't want to hurt me or my family when i confronted ryan about it he denied it and said that she'd been trying to come on to him for some time and he never mentioned it because he didn't want to ruin our relationship he begged me not to believe her and so we continued how we were kelly grew resentful and made nasty comments about how i was forcing a man who didn't even love me to marry me because i had low self-esteem constantly a month later she sent me a video of them passionately hugging in my bed and multiple screenshots of him telling her he loved her how he was she was the girl he was marrying how he hated that i wouldn't let them be together i was devastated and angry but my best friend convinced me to not go nuclear on them and instead to quietly move out when ryan was at work the next week so that's what i did i contacted my dad and my stepmom and asked him if i could move in temporarily i removed the money that i contributed into our joint account for wedding expenses and transferred the rest to him before closing the account once i got settled in i sent all the screenshots that she had sent me to all of her relatives and his ryan tried to get back together with me multiple times but i ended up blocking him when i found out that he had proposed to her with the same ring he gave me i had left it behind now kelly is my step-sister for my mom's side i have another stepsister and stepbrother for my mom's second marriage and a half-sister they all went to the wedding whenever i tried to express that i was hurt by the fact that they were just supporting kelly and ryan as though that what they did meant nothing to me they would shrug it off and say they couldn't cut them out completely because they were family i haven't spent a single holiday with my mom's side since neither has my older biological brother or sister i only see my mom and half sister when i invite them over to my place since kelly and ryan moved in with my mom and my stepdad a year after they got married our relationship is very rocky but i've grown closer to my dad and stepmom and their children who have all been very supportive since this all happened so it's not all been bad i got a new boyfriend and on new year's day he proposed to me we had a small engagement party which i invited my mom and half-sister to they never turned up because i was quote excluding half of our family i never invited my stepdad or step siblings because they were pretty hurtful when it came out that kelly and ryan were sleeping together they claimed it wasn't their fault that i got in the way of true love and made me out to be some sort of vindictive disney villain for being angry with them we were planning to have our wedding ceremony this summer but in late february my husband suggested we postponed until next year because he was concerned covert would get worse and would have to cancel or reschedule anyway i ended up finding out i was pregnant a month before our original wedding date so we had a courthouse wedding on that date with a plan to hold a ceremony next year only my dad's side of the family were aware of both the pregnancy and the wedding so my stepmom likes to knit and she's been making stuff for the baby recently she posted about the things she made on facebook with a caption talking about how excited she was to have another grandchild soon i was tagged in the post i have zero issues with the post i never told my family that i wasn't going to inform my mom's side it wasn't that i intentionally hid it from her she just never seemed very interested in my life for relationships so i never brought it up my mom called me an hour later to demand to know if i was pregnant and how she couldn't believe i hadn't told her she was finally going to be a grandmother she has since invited me and my husband over to her house multiple times i've declined every single time for obvious reasons my stepdad who i've barely spoken to in five years has reached out to tell me how excited he is to meet the baby and my husband and the same with my siblings even kelly reached out to my husband to congratulate us i was furious the next time my mom and stepdad called me i finally laid into them i told them i didn't want them to keep inviting me over when they knew i would be forced to see kelly and ryan if i came i told them how hurt and angry i steal him over what they did to me and how my family dismissed my feelings i told them how they wouldn't throw kelly and ryan away but they were so quick to leave me out to rot while i was going through the worst betrayal i'd ever experienced in my life i told them i wasn't even sure i wanted people like them in my child's life my mom was crying hysterically and kept saying i was being cruel and couldn't deprive her of her first grandchild the thing is my baby isn't her first grandchild my sister has two adopted daughters already who my mom doesn't even try to bond with she kept wailing about how i might be the only person in our family to give her grandchildren my stepsisters are both having a hard time getting pregnant and my half-sister has proclaimed herself to be child-free my stepdad got angry and defensive he claimed i was petty for holding on to something that happened five years ago he pointed out how i had found someone else so i should understand how love works and sometimes two people just can't help themselves you love who you love basically he said kelly and ryan were happy together so i should be happy for them the way that they're happy for me and my husband the ironic thing is my sister told me that kelly and ryan look like they were on the verge of divorce and they argue constantly my mom complains to her about them and how my siblings all hate him but pretend they like him for kelly's sake i ended up hanging up because i was so angry and when i get angry i start crying i didn't want them to think that they got to me since then i've been receiving texts and calls non-stop from my mom's family they're all essentially telling me that i should be over things already it's gotten to the point that me and my husband have switched phones so he can screen my messages for me and i don't have to read them how do i make my family understand just how unforgivable what kelly and ryan did to me is i would prefer not to go completely no contact but is that my only option here op i'm seeing some major red flags here they keep complaining about what you did to them and not what they did to you they've got this completely backwards and her acting like they did nothing wrong down in the comments i'm gonna agree with lux lillium being over the relationship is not the same as being over the betrayal yeah and on top of that you've also got the added layer of the fact that your family basically just threw you away in favor of your stepsister so it's incredibly transparent that they chose their favorite and it's not you overall op i would agree that going no contact might be a little bit extreme in this situation but i think that your best last shot is to explain to them very clearly that what they did to you hurt you and that you can't move forward with mending these relationships unless they take some form of accountability for their actions maybe even show them this reddit post and let them see how literally everyone in the comments is agreeing how awful they are i'm a 14 year old boy do i call the police on my mom's hit and run my mom was driving me to school this week she was taking a turn and obviously wasn't looking because she took the turn white whoa she was taking a turn and obviously wasn't looking because she took the turn wide and hit a kid from school who was riding to the bike racks he was in the other lane that goes the other way our car went over him and i heard him yell out i don't like know him but he's in a different year than me after that happened mom just kept driving i told her we need to call the police or ambulance or something mom just kept saying that he swerved and hit her and that we don't call the police if we did nothing wrong she told me to keep quiet and knows that i'll do the right thing i saw a photo on instagram of him in the hospital and he's all bruised and looks rough as guts i've just been feeling really bad and it's like i can't eat and feel like throwing up it's like mom did something really wrong and it feels really bad to not say anything i wasn't even allowed to tell dad about it but him and mom are divorced and i'm not allowed to tell him lots of things if i tell someone mom will probably get arrested and then it'll be my fault i don't know and i want to stop feeling so bad do i tell on my mom or not so first of all op let's make one thing perfectly crystal clear nothing about what happened here is your fault the fact that your mom is putting this weight on your shoulders is just disgusting this is her fault not yours in any event i'm going to read this reply from twin cause ross which i could not agree with more i'm on team tell your dad this is too big for a 14 year old to deal with and you need support around this that your mom is not capable of providing your dad needs to know all of this including how you feel and your mom is wrong to tell you not to seek his help oh man op i actually had to pause this recording step away from my computer for a while and actually think about what else you should do i've been reading through the comments and people are really hesitant to tell you to report your mom because that's a huge thing to do but after thinking about this long and hard yeah i actually think that you should report your mom my reasoning for that is that we know that your mom is the type of person who will run over a child and just keep driving and fundamentally at the end of the day that is not a person that we want raising you op i mean we've also got the added complication of the kid who being run over deserving some sort of justice here but at the end of the day i don't think it's right for anyone on reddit or youtube to say that the responsibility falls on this 14 year old boy's shoulders to provide that justice so since he's a child himself all we can say is that he needs to make a decision that protects him and in my personal opinion and a lot of people will probably disagree with me down in the comments i think that what opie's mother did makes her no longer suitable to raise op she performed a violent felony and then is telling her kid to keep it secret which in my opinion is literal child abuse yeah i think you should report your mom op i'm a 33 year old male and my 36 year old fiance didn't want to sign a prenup with me got an inheritance and now once a prenup a little background here is that i make around 250 thousand dollars a year my fiance makes around 65k a year we've both been divorced i asked for a prenup protecting my existing assets two rental properties worth around 400k together my retirement account my house which i live in my existing savings account and just sentimental things i offered to pay for a lawyer for and make everything earned after the wedding fair game in a divorce split in my previous divorce my ex took a lot that i had before we ever even met each other and took a lot of things with sentimental value just to hurt me i floated the idea of a prenup and she was not okay with it it hurt her feelings and she said i was planning for a divorce if i want to prenup she had this idea that when we marry everything becomes ours we've been dating for four years and had very few bumps so i don't see a super high risk of divorce but i do acknowledge it's there anyways i love her and i said sure fast forward a couple of months and her grandmother abruptly died it wasn't expected her grandmother was quite healthy before she had a heart attack apparently the grandmother left the entire estate to her worth roughly eight hundred thousand dollars now the tables have turned and she wants a prenup protecting these assets from me which i was fine with but she doesn't want to sign my prenup in return for that her reasoning is that her grandmother wouldn't have wanted her well to leave her direct family and that there's a reason it was all left to me and not my siblings or parents and that the prenup must not have been important to me because i threw out the idea after the minimal pushback i'm at a loss here in one regard i'm glad we had prenup discussions because it brought out these sides of us but i'm really wondering if this four-year relationship that's been full of nothing but love and support for each other until now is even salvageable she's not willing to budget her own prenup like i was and i'm finding this whole situation very frustrating op your girlfriend's attitude is very simple what's yours is mine and what's mine is mine this woman is a great a hypocrite and it's time to draw a line in the sand either both of you sign the others prenup or none of you sign a prenup i'm a 33 year old guy and my 32 year old wife said her ex's name while we were passionately hugging my wife and i have been married for four years and we have a two-year-old we dated on and off for three years before getting married last night she said her ex's name while we were passionately hugging she gave some weird excuse as to why she said it's a common name and admittedly it is and she must have heard it recently i wasn't gonna start a big argument with her at the time and it's since gotten me worried about why she did that for some background this was a guy she was with for a couple of years before i met her they met in college and were serious for some time they had broken up when i met her and decided they were better as friends they were friends for years before they did it we started dating but he remained in the picture he was her best friend first and foremost and i begrudgingly went along with it for several months pass and i put my foot down saying it's too uncomfortable for me there was some resistance but she stepped back from him every time we broke up she was with him we finally reconciled and got engaged he apparently didn't know this and stopped talking to her she was devastated which should have been a red flag we talked about it and she was happy to have chosen me now after this happened i'm tempted to see if she's gotten back in contact with him again i know she's checked in on social media because i saw the searches on the laptop she doesn't know i know that i don't think she'd cheat but this guy was always different for her do i just confront her do i start going through her phone or am i being paranoid and then opie posted an update thank you everyone for your help and advice i did my investigating before talking to her i went through his social media first but there was nothing explicitly saying anything was going on there were a few mentions of his love and some comments but that could mean anything i did look at the phone bill and there looks to be calls with him pretty regularly onto hers i was able to get her phone when she was asleep she must have forgotten i knew the code there was nothing in the text and no weird calls so she deleted them i did find some apps that she tried to keep hidden like snapchat and kik sure enough there's their conversations and pictures she exploded when she had the conversation and left with our child to her mothers i contacted a lawyer and i'm in the process of a divorce and figuring out custody i'm heartbroken and i'm more angry than anything else i'm angry at her but i'm also angry at myself for dismissing so many red flags that's rough buddy that was our slash relationship advice and if you like this content then check out my podcast where i publish the exact same episodes also hit that subscribe button because i put out new reddit videos every single day

Channel: rSlash

Views: 389,657

Rating: 4.9429379 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, comedy, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, relationshipadvice, relationship_advice, relationship advice, r/relationship_advice, relationship_advice posts, relationship, r/relationships

Id: 1r613O4XlSE

Length: 15min 46sec (946 seconds)

Published: Tue Sep 15 2020