Parents Share the Funniest Reasons They Had Been Called to School | Parents' Stories #13

parents have read it what's the funniest reason you've been called into school to collect your child i was called to collect my son when he was in first grade because he was being disrespectful to his classmates they wouldn't explain my son told me that jeffrey pantsed him that makes no sense about an hour later the light bulb went on you didn't wear underwear today did you nope i was called in because the elementary school was going on a field that my son forgot to give me the permission slip for he decided to give forgery a whirl this was in first grade so the handwriting was awful he also signed my name mom my wife and her father's names both start with the same letter a while back he saw her signature and commented that it looked a lot like his so she said that's because i forged your signature so much in school i got a phone call earlier this year from the school nurse saying she was concerned because my son had passed out while in the lunch line i went to pick him up and he seemed a little dazed but okay my kid couldn't remember anything about what happened beforehand so i made an appointment with his pediatrician for an hour later right as we were getting ready to leave he sheepishly said mom i just remembered that right before i passed out we were playing a game to see who could turn their face the reddest so my kid had me thinking he had a brain tumor but no he just held his breath until he passed out and not a single other kid thought they should mention that to the teacher thanks for the gold in my senior year of hostel i was nearly not allowed to graduate and my family was called because i forged my own name by writing him the guardian section of a permission slip i was 18. my kid got some huge trouble in kindergarten a girl told the teacher he said the s word he lost recess they called me it was a big deal i went to pick him up and said so what's the s word and he stared at his shoes and whispered sexy yeah confirmed by the little tattletail all of this was caused by sexy funniest one i've ever heard my kids surprisingly well behaved at school was a parent having to come get their kid after they were caught selling imaginary friends to the younger students for one dollar a piece that kid's gonna become a business mogul someday i made the mistake of telling my step-daughter about the professor i had in college that we knew never read our papers so it turned into a class game to fit ridiculous sentences and bad jokes into the middle of them to see if we'd ever get caught she apparently decided that was an amazing thing to do and i got called for a phone conference because she turned in a history paper that was chock full of awful puns that were not appreciated as a teacher i would have definitely enjoyed marking this work and lucky with the audience my mother was called to pick me and my twin sister out because we were turning blue i think it was fourth grade we felt fine though it was only after she arrived that we all remembered she had put brand new blue flannel sheets on our bed the night before apparently she hadn't washed them first i got banned form wearing my favorite yellow shirt to school because the public health nurse kept thinking i had yellow jaundice it did not bleed dion to me i was so white that the color reflected onto my skin [Music] my little brother likes cheese and mustard sandwiches so my mom made him cheese and mustard sandwiches for lunch when the teacher asked why he didn't have any meat on his sandwich he said either we can't afford meat or my mom doesn't let me or something like that whatever he said was enough to send cps over to the house another time he came to school saying that his mom loved coke that his mom said she is addicted to coke cps was called a game they lived in a different area this time coca-cola my mom couldn't go a day without a coke so she joked that she was addicted to coke i do see the irony that she was actually addicted to a drug just not the one cps was worried about i got a call that my son was sick and that i had to come pick him up he was completely fine that morning i asked the nurse he really can't go back to class and she said he says he's really sick fine i picked him up and on the walk home i asked what was up he said he had to fart really badly and didn't want to do it in class i laughed and said okay two days later i get another call to pick him up so i got him and it was for the same reason i told him that it was funny once but that from now on if he needed to fart in class he should go to the bathroom lol farting at home is best fart daycare had to talk to the director because my son three or four told another kid i'm gonna ref you up turns out he was singing bruno mars uptown funk you up so as a non-native speaker i believe that i'm gonna freak you up with the actual lyrics for many years my youngest had a slight speech impediment when he was at nursery he would replace his s's with f's to approximate the sound i had to have a chat with the head at pick up time because i'd unthinkingly used the phrase so long suckers when pulling away from some traffic lights the day before and he liked the sound of it so much he used it himself my youngest mix is p with t at the end of words i haven't been called to get him from daycare he's too but it's hard to stifle my laughter sometimes especially as there is a little toy sheep at his daycare that he wants this little toy sheep causes him to exclaim my crap as he rushes to get it my professor cited my mom because she said i was writing too slow and turned my test in right as the bell rang my mom had to leave work early to hear about her child writing slow the reason i was writing slow was because on my last test i was docked points for handwriting so this time i made sure i had the perfect most fanciest handwriting that teacher had ever seen after that the teacher stopped docking me points due to handwriting when i went to school cursive was mandatory from third grade onwards if your work wasn't in cursive it wasn't marked consequently i now have crappy cursive handwriting that was in elementary school early years the principal called us and looked at us with a stern look of disapproval while telling us our son was using bad language i then proceeded to explain to her that my wife and i only spoke french at home and we did not have television the only english our son had ever heard was at school so i asked her what she was going to do about it it was one of the shortest conversations i ever had with a principal literally pardon my french i was the kid and i was in third grade i climbed on a tree not even that high and then i wanted to climb down a teacher who hated me saw me and told me to stay there and not to move i told her it's no problem for me to come down she insisted i stayed there and turned around to call the fire brigade to get me down i had enough and climbed down anyway and then she called my mom because it was my fault the fire brigade was called for no reason the real reason was you stopped her from meeting that hot fireman she dreamed of at night i was in an early morning college class and when i got out i realized i had missed calls texts and emails from my daughter's preschool a voicemail said she had been throwing up and to please harry and come get her when i got to the school the receptionist showed me to a room where my daughter was sat with a trash can on her lap she told me my daughter kept announcing she was throwing up and then would cough and spit into the trash can she had no fever and was otherwise cheerful and talkative i signed her out got her outside and into my car where she jumped forward and kissed my cheek and told me she missed me and where would i like to go for lunch that kid busted herself out of preschool to finagle a lunch date with me it worked dang right it did my son went to a private catholic school from first grade through eighth grade i had a nun call me one day because my son and a friend were having a peeing for distance contests in the bathroom and then another day i was called because my son was looking to see if the dictionary had the word penis in it both incidents were in the third grade he was merely identifying his weapon of choice in the distance contest when i was in seventh grade i was an office runner basically if your writing and writing skills were above a certain level they'd let you skip reading class and just work in the office getting kids whose parents had come for them delivering messages that sort of thing anyway the kid next to me just wouldn't shut the frick up he kept rattling on and on and on and i'd had enough of it i had a monster fart brewing so i cocked my leg locked eyes with him told him to shut his mouth and farted on him or at least that was the plan instead i cocked my leg locked eyes with him told him to shut his mouth and completely crap my pants in the most glorious fashion this wasn't a little nugget this was a full pants load of chocolate pudding then ran down my leg and made a little puddle on the floor everything in the office goes dead silent and there's no mistaking what's just happened the kid just stared at me with absolute horror in his eyes without looking away from him i raised my hand and said miss off his lady's name i don't remember i think i need to call my mom i went home took a bath threw the pants away and came back the next day the kid was seated on the opposite side of the room from me and i never had a problem with him again he feared and respected me from then on the ultimate power move my dad got sent to the principal's office for telling his sixth grade teacher she was pronouncing the state capital of south dakota pierre wrong but she kept saying pierre two syllables like the french name and he said it was pier one syllable like what you fish off of he was sent off for not respecting a teacher's authority my grandma had to drive to school to talk to the teacher and principal and says did you ask why he says it peer because if you did you'd find out that both his father and i are from south dakota he visits his grandparents and aunts and uncles in south dakota every summer he knows plenty of people from south dakota who all say pier do you know anyone from south dakota no well take it from a south dakotan its peer were not fancy french people and stopped wasting my time my son fourteen eighth grade during class change walked into the boy's bathroom put his hands over his head and while thrusting his hips in a humping motion told all the other boys in the room to protect your buttholes gentlemen here i come the funniest part about it all that exact same description was jotted down on the right up slip even the principal couldn't stop laughing holy heck that's funny my daughter hid inside of a toy box for hours in preschool and the teachers couldn't find her lol she's going to be my wild child when i was in second grade i had a shirt that we got as a hand down from a friend of my mom's with braille on the front apparently no one ever took the time to figure out what it said but there was a translator key on the sleeve so i sat down and translated the word on the front one letter at a time while in class f u c k o f f oh my i said i knew this was a bad word so i told my teacher and apologized i wasn't in trouble but my parents were called and asked to come bring in a new shirt while i waited in the office my principal thought it was hilarious apparently we had a classmate who was partially blind i'm unsure if she had vision enough to see my shirt but she did no braille i believe that is one of the reasons i had to wait in the office though i'd like to imagine a seven-year-old saying that like an elderly woman seeing something risque not a parent but as a kid when i got pokemon yellow i was so goddang into it that when we went out for lunch one day at school i got inside this huge bush that was practically hollow inside it was among a load of other large bushes and trees at the side of the school field and rarely ever was entered by students because we weren't really allowed so i sat there for hours playing pokemon and when i came out it was 3pm school closed at 3.30 i had been in there since 12.30 and my mother was at the school and was freaking out because she thought they'd let me leave the school alone [Music] i got called on my work cell several times right out of college to come to a local high school because my 14 year old son was in trouble i don't have a son and if i had a son it would be very impressive if he was 14 years old then because i would have had to conceive him when i was nine i told them that they kept calling finally i showed up at the high school to prove that i at 23 year old white guy was not the father of the 14 year old indian boy the assistant principal was like oh right not gonna lie i did that in high school they asked us to fill contact forms and i just gave a random phone number because i didn't want them calling home for skipping class my mom told me that when my brother was in grade school she got the call to pick him up for a day's suspension turned out that during lunch he opened his lunchbox and pulled out a can of fosters it was empty and it was meant to be a joke but the school didn't see it that way he was nine and right at the start of a decade-long mission to raise heck i got a call to pick up my daughter in kindergarten because she had no underwear she had them on when i put her on the bus so i have no idea what happened totally embarrassing oh my i have four kids all adults now who are pretty high high-spirited back in the day my oldest son however wins the prize from an incident in sixth grade i got a call one afternoon and he had been sent to the principal's office nothing new there and i needed to come get him at once although he had mooned the second graders all of them and their teachers not me but a classmate of a co-worker sent to everyone home once many years ago he nicked decent bit of elemental potassium from the chemistry lab and dropped it down the sewer access pipe outside the school this was not good for the school's plumbing city had to dig up the sidewalk to repair things not me but my sister she got a call from her son's very catholic school that he needed to be picked up she gets to the school and the principal said that he had to ho home for the day because he peed on the tree outside at recess he really laid into her about how they had to bleach the tree seriously they poured bleach on the tree because a little kid peed on it and it was terrible and how she shouldn't be teaching her son these things my sister looked him straight in the eye and asked do you really think i have the right plumbing to have taught him that yell at my husband when he comes in next time bleaching trees has got to be one of the better things i've heard today me when i was a kid we moved from middle america to the west coast i had extra sounds in a lot of my words they called my mom about my speech impediment after talking to my mom they understood it was not a so etch impediment but my birth sound language it is washington not washington my mom says washing machine and i always ask her how to spell that it's funny now but wasn't at the time one day i was called to pick up my daughter from school i asked why and was vaguely told she had been caught cheating was being disrespectful to the teacher and had destroyed government property police i thought what has she done my mind instantly went through scenarios in which she had cheated on a test got caught then my sweet little seven-year-old had cursed the teacher while throwing something through a window i got to the school found my scared daughter in the principal's office looking totally dejected and asked for an explanation i discovered the cheating was that she had giggled while playing a game where someone was it and the other half of the classroom had to guess who it was the disrespecting teacher was from her crossing her arms when she was being told how she wrecked the game the best was the explanation for destroying government property during story time she was picking at loose carpet threads i was extremely angry with my daughter the whole drive from work and after this load of w t f it instantly transferred to anger with the school you called me here because she giggled crossed her arms and picked at old nasty carpet i was hot and took my daughter home letting her know i was a bit upset with her but let her know that there would be no more punishment she'd been through enough we went home and watched cartoons and i made her favorite grilled cheese and tomato soup for lunch crap like this is precisely why parents side with their kids so much we all went through school we know the most likely teachers to kick up a fuss the ones who are a problem themselves not a parent but my sister once convinced half of her pre-k class to drop their pants in front of their vice principal i don't even remember why i think they wanted more recess i received a call from the vp of my daughter's school one day while i was at work i could tell the vp was holding back her laughter but she tried to remain professional hello your daughter acted out in class today the children were switching from colouring to reading at the carpet she threw her crayons down and pointedly said to the teacher are you freaking kidding me my knee jerk reaction was damn it are you freaking killing me it is clear where she learned this from my second thought was dang i have a kid in junior kindergarten that knows how to use that phrase in a correct form the following year the vp is no longer at the school we attend similar social group and talk often she loves to tell me that making that phone call was one of the funniest calls she has had to make as an educator my dad was called to the school when i was in grade one apparently i'd been caught with my hand in a girl's pants and hers in mine while in class nephew is staying with me for two months i showed him dexter's laboratory for the first time next day they call me to pick him up because he would only say omelet do fromage to any interaction someone should have mocked him with that's all you can say it would have stopped him i too was the child i peed on my friend in fifth grade we were competing in who could pee the furthest back from the urinal when a buddy of mine decided to run underneath it for laughs hand slipped peed down his back sent to the principals my four-year-old teacher told me he had repeatedly called her and butthole she had taken something away from him and said that's all every time she came near him he said that's all to her knowing him he probably he used the same tone of voice she had used and she was a nasty piece of work when my eldest was in seventh grade i was called to school and told he was sharing inappropriate photos with his friends he had torn pictures from magazines of classic nude artwork when i asked my son where he found the pictures he told me magazines in the school library i asked the school why they were supplying my son with smut and they got all pissy apparently i was supposed to discipline my child not laugh at the school system unicorn club so my daughter was in fifth grade she was proving to be pretty responsible so she was allowed to have a cell phone because she was home about an hour before i was on weekdays and an instagram account that i heavily monitored we never had any issues still haven't and she's now in high school well i get a call from her school's principal one day he tells me two boys were fist fighting in the lunch room i asked what that had to do with my daughter well apparently my child had used an instagram account to start what was essentially a cult called unicorn club unicorns were obviously the worship deity with goats being the devil figure to the unicorn gods these two boys got into a fist fight over whether unicorns or goats were better i had to pick her up to prevent further disputes and disband unicorn club tl dr my 10 years old daughter created a small cult around unicorn worship i can respect this not me but my co-worker at the time the school called her one day to come pick up a five-year-old daughter for threatening to murder the teacher her daughter had gotten in trouble for talking when the teacher put her in timeout she said if you put me in timeout my daddy is going to come here and murder you turns out my co-worker lives on a farm where they butcher pigs when it was time to butcher a pig her dad would say gonna go murder a pig which is where she picked it up when they asked her what she thought that word meant she said you know murder it they go away and you get a new one so she thought she could get her daddy to come out and replace the teacher with a new teacher and that was what the word murder meant this is cute if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now

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Keywords: parents, parents stories, funniest kids, funniest things kids say, school, school stories, #updootst, updoot, updoot reddit, updoot everything, reddit on tap, toadfilms, pewdiepie, reddit, askreddit, funny reddit, reddit stories, top posts, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, reddit compilation, /r, r/, r/askreddit, top posts of r/, askreddit reading, best reddit posts, top posts of all time, people of reddit, askreddit question, ask reddit, subreddit, sub, reddit stories 2021

Id: sbcncXKj-sU

Length: 22min 1sec (1321 seconds)

Published: Fri Mar 12 2021