Omegle With My Mom 😬😳 - Families # 6

we are back this is families speaking of families my family is back you know yeah ela and theodore arrived at 5 a.m this morning which means dad didn't sleep so tired so forgive me if i'm sleepy you look sleepy yeah my eyes are heavy but we have a great episode here today um sponsored by honey babble and hello fresh okay oh and uh important show announcement is that to this week we're going back to the schedule we have families off the rails and after dark we're going it's all back yeah all the time baby so everybody stop worrying we're back okay just when ela's gone things go off the rails you know how it is we're back one other thing real fast um is that this thursday we have a teddy fresh collection coming out teddy fresh on instagram you can preview it here's one today um we got these jeans look at this oh wow and this top whoops is that high waisted um i don't no it looks normal to me um you know there's a bunch of cool stuff coming out uh follow teddyfresh on instagram to find out when it's coming out but it's coming on thursday 10 a.m here we go we got cool designs beautiful graphics this is a floral embroidery that says teddy fresh oh my goodness classic you know what it is get on over there teddyfresh.com and terryfresh on instagram thank you welcome back ela also shout out to my mom who is rocking the care bears but there's still some left on the website also my mom keeps pointing out and i often forget that you have a pacemaker or i don't wanna i don't like but yeah you wanna show it off my pacemaker yeah tick-tock people are curious i can't is it usual where you can oh my god it's so wild there's like a big device it is it's a device that keeps my heart moving what's it like having a big device in your body it's uncomfortable do you get used to it no really no whenever i sleep it just digs into my shoulder i think that might have something to do with this thing oh my god i've got a bump here too did you get any news on the bump i talked to the doctor this morning what did he say i have to see an orthopedic doctor next but they're not super worried about it no i i will you know they have no idea what it is my mom's got a bump she's got a pacemaker yes but you know when my my mom had like did they ever figure out what happened to you i mean did mom have a heart attack like what happened no my heart just stopped i didn't have a heart attack oh isn't that what a heart attack is um that's heart failure my my uh nothing was clogged it's it's i have six sinus syndrome and it's an electrical charge thing where your your heart isn't in sync and so um it doesn't beat correctly and my heart was going you know i don't feel like beating i'm just gonna hang out a little bit so it just would stop so so this keeps it beating it gives it a kick do you feel this when it shocks your heart do you ever feel it shocking away or just doing its thing if i'm real still yeah i can feel it sometimes really i have something else a cardio issue where my heart skips a beat and it starts going really really fast that happens yeah oh my god i'm gonna outlive everybody i think so actually i gotta and dad's bionic dad's got a new shoulder and i guess how does it feel to be older we're falling apart dad doesn't know yeah i forget you have that pace my mom nearly died i thought i honestly thought you were going to die yeah i kind of thought i was scared it was for a while there was a few years ago my mom was in the hospital uh gravely ill you know it's messed the surgeon actually did more damage than the whatever the heart thing you had in the end well i mean if i hadn't had the pacemaker put in i i would my heart would have just stopped and i would have you know died so he put it in but you know because i'm so thin they managed to puncture my lungs oh god i forgot about so so they take out like a buzzsaw they rush my mom into the hospital well i don't know how they do it they rushed my mom in the hospital and yes to safer they did save your life but i did i think they almost killed you because that's when i was really worried about you yeah they they cracked her chest open tear it open to get to your heart well no they don't tear it open they just you have like a cartilage and they the doctor explained to me that he was going to take it out and then they kind of lift up your rib cage and then they kind of uh there's two wires that go to my heart the top and the bottom part of my heart anyways they have to put like a straw device they they put it between your ribs and and they thread it and it has to go into your heart and he scratched the lung i guess when he was doing that he punctured my lung and because i have autoimmune disorders my lung wouldn't refill well i don't think puncturing the lung is generally something that you easily heal from anyway no actually when your lung gets punctured um sometimes it'll just repair itself and reinflate and it's not a big deal but because of my autoimmune disorders my lung wouldn't refill and then my other lung was starting to collapse and and when i was in the hospital they kept on taking x-rays of me which i didn't understand and then uh this doctor comes rushing in and goes okay i'm here for the emergency and i had already had my my heart surgery i didn't know what's happening i go what emergency you were hard at breathing you were having difficulty breathing at the time yeah yeah you just figured well i just had a major surgery right right and he goes well one lung is completely collapsed and the other lung is going is losing its its shape and unless you want to be on a respirator we need to take you into surgery now oh my god and the nurse is well doctor when do you want to prep her and he said yesterday and jesus so they whisked me away to the table and they they stuck a hose in me and then all this you know because when your lung is punctured you get fluid and blood anyways all that had to be emptied out and then they tried to re-refill your thing where they put a tube in your mouth and sucked fluid or no no it was just into my lungs oh they did it out of your back right right right right right they they stuck me in with a needle and then they had to take a small tube into a bigger oh it was a bigger tube into a smaller tube i don't remember but the whole thing was really out of your lungs through your back right right right right right but that was oh god this story's so long it was just crazy but i'm glad i mean it was crazy because i mean a tangent from the from the pacemaker but yeah i just can't believe that you're like back in good health because man things were looking things were looking really bad and you just made such a amazing recovery yeah it took about a year but i came back i came back and now i swim back and better than ever instead of run i swim so so there you have it my mom's pacemaker story but better still by the way the moral of the story is oh the teddy fresh of the folks with daddy fresh well thank you so much the moral of the story in cases anyone's wondering is go to the doctor because you refused to go to the doctor as you sat dying in bed i thought i had food boys my brother your son how do you how do you mistake food poisoning for like heart stoppage i didn't sing out she passed you know yeah dad you you you disgrace she passed out she was puking she couldn't breathe you're your dad who called you and said he called my brother who was living in vegas at that time he said you need to go check on well you know my mother you refused to go you refused to go to the hospital and even when the paramedics came and they said if you don't go to the hospital you're going to die my mom said no it's fine i'll be back no that's not what happened that's what happened no yes it is they i kept on passing out because my heart was stopping when the paramedics were there and when i came to the paramedics said i needed to choose which hospital i wanted to go to and i didn't really want to go to the hospital that's what i just said what's different well he said to me okay but you have to sign this waiver i go what's the waiver for he goes so when you die yeah we're not that we're not we're not responsible i go wait what when i die he goes yeah you're not going to make it if your heart stops you'll have brain damage and you'll probably die and then i thought well maybe i should i wonder if that's a nice trick they use just to get people to go to the hospital they're like oh you don't want to go to the hospital like okay well when you die which you're gonna die go ahead and just sign this yeah but like what's what i'm saying like i don't know some people like my mom you've always been this way or adverse to seeing a doctor or getting help and so that's the moral of the story because if your ass would have gone to the hospital before who knows what could have been well you know in the past i have had episodes where i was sick the same thing happened and i would pass out and i just thought that was a part of not feeling good dad do you have a comment on this the other lesson i think is uh don't need critical medical care in las vegas oh don't live in las vegas yeah well if you need you know there's well people love it there some people not us but oh you're the medical there is not that good i don't think we saw ample evidence of that well unfortunately people that live in las vegas probably don't have the option of flying to los angeles if they're dying that's true so the tip is don't live in vegas well unless you like to gamble you know what so my heart doctor the my cardiologist after when i had the car when i had the tempinade you know i went to the doctor a follow-up they made me promise to go to see the cardiologist after i had gotten out of the hospital i was out of the hospital for what one day two days babe two days because i had called i called the emergency because i wasn't feeling good at all you got out after i got out and and uh they i i think it was the next day i went into the the office and the regular doctor that had performed the surgery on me that collapsed my lung was on vacation and so um i was seen by another doctor and they said um that's awesome just punctured your longest yeah everything was fine and i said oh by the way i was told when i was in the hospital that i needed to take an x-ray before i leave and so because i was ready to walk out and then i just remembered so they said okay so i took the x-ray and then the doctor comes in and looks at me runs out again looks at the x-ray comes back and he says okay we got to take you to the hospital now oh my god i went what i just got out remember so wait you went back to the hospital for a follow-up x-ray or i know i went to the just the the regular cardiologists office just to check this checkup right because i on the pacemaker right because my my pacemaker was on something wasn't right and then uh when i reminded them that i was supposed to take an x-ray and i took it and the the the doctor that was seeing other patients you know they said oh can you just look at this x-ray really quick for this one patient and when he saw it he freaked out because my heart was collapsing oh my what does that mean i had so much fluid in my pericardium it's like an inner tube that circles your heart right and it filled up with so much fluid around your heart around my heart that it was squishing my heart and my heart the right top side of my heart was actually collapsing jesus and so they said if you don't get to the hospital now you will die how many times did you hear that oh god well the doctor's office is adjacent to the hospital yeah it was right here in a wheelchair went down a floor went into the passageway into the then you had to get another surgery to drain the fluid around your heart yeah yeah yep yep that's crazy yeah it was it was really i guess you were crazy you guys could i mean the woman that you sits before you guys i remember when you came to visit us once and uh you were just you were so frail and sick and just you were in such bad shape and you mean after the surgery the time you remember when possible came over yeah yeah yeah oh yeah i was really sick oh god i was so sick well when she came home that first week i mean i didn't sleep i stayed up and i listened to make sure she was breathing and i'd nudge her occasionally to make sure she was still you know conscious awake alive uh because yeah it was it was close after all of this like what dad's describing my my lung again filled up with fluid and i was literally drowning in my lung and uh when they dad was with me they for some reason they let you in the room when they they took a needle and they punctured the back thing i heard that's really painful when they saw oh my god that was so painful and they took out how many liters a liter of i think was more than a liter was almost two liters it was two big bottles of blue and [ __ ] no it was just like it looked like beer too it was just a dark it was good it tasted good too so but after that i was fine wow i was fine i'm like a cat i think i've got a few more lives left well i'm just still amazed that you made a full recovery so high five mom survived i did mom living yeah we love a living grandma anyway teddyfresh.com yes steady fresh that was a weird weird advertisement okay we talked about saving the monarch butterflies i do need to give a disclaimer here i know i was getting ready to plant a bunch of milkweeds yes and then we found out that they're freaking poisonous they're not that poisonous they're super poisonous to small dogs and and and children small animals and kids that's not true yes it is true no mom you got to be upfront about the milkweed dangers no you can't save the monarchs at the first of all you would have to ingest so much of it like animals that graze like you know like cows instinctively for some reason they know not to eat the milkweed because it's poisonous but if they were left with no food to eat they would eat it and it would take so much for them to get sick it's a cow a cow weighs like 600 pounds i'm just or more yeah i'm just saying that it's dangerous to pets it's not like oleander it's just i mean it sounds like it is no it's not it's not it's dangerous i'm just giving you a warning about the milk you know i tend to milk weeds every day and i've never gotten sick you'd have to sit there read me an excerpt on the on the milkweed because when i was looking it up it sounds like if your animal or child gets into it it can be really dangerous you would have to eat so much milkweed and besides you can plant it in the back maybe it's not going to go in the back oh yeah teddy's not gonna go in the backyard no not in the backyard yeah teddy never wanders around the backyard no it's no more poisonous than oleander no that's not true milkweed contains cardiac glyco glycosides that are poisonous to humans but the level of toxic toxicity toxicity it depends on the species first of all and how old it is how toxic is milkweed all right let's find out if you planted milkweed for monarch butterflies you may be wondering just how toxic they are for people and animals milkweed contains all right just what i said poisonously blah blah blah blah depends on the species according to the agricultural research and development or center of ohio state university common milkweed is slightly toxic to humans but only if eaten in a large amount well maybe i'm hungry maybe maybe theodore's out there and he's feeling hungry and he sees the milkweeds and he's going for it he would have to eat milkweed may cause losses at any time but it is most dangerous during active growing seasons several species of milkweeds are poisonous to range animals to range animals i think you didn't point out the difference between indigenous and foreign milkweed that's true too so that's kind of important indigenous milkweed i'm telling you these monarchs want to die they just they want to die like they don't so here's no it's not it's not toxic to them they i know but they want to die don't you understand they have one food source and it's poisonous to everything else on the planet it's not poisonous to everything like what is with these monarch butterflies couldn't they find a more a more sustainable thing to eat i found a stowaway a moth that was living off of the milkweed and he was like i had to kick him out because he was eating the plant well it worked for them for probably ten thousand years till humans came and started uh digging up all of the milkweed and they were never gonna make it they were never gonna make it for them they need to make it judging by the comments mom got uh yeah everybody's on everywhere everyone i just want to say that i i feel morally obligated to say look into the milkweed situation all right what did 9 11. and good do you want to clarify the indigenous aspect yes of that if you go to nurseries the usually what you can find is the tropical milkweed and you know it's tropical because the flowers are yellow and orange of course and california's uh indigenous uh milkweed is white flowers and pink but for some reason fascinating they don't they don't sell them at the nursery you have to get their seeds i've got seeds growing oh you got seeds you got seeds for days well not for days i used them i already planted them i sent dan pictures of my of my milkweed anyway i i don't think theodore or the dogs are in the habit of just eating random plants but i just have to say because i don't want anybody being like i tried to save the monarchs and now my dog is dead i just got to put it out there that's all i'm saying watch out for the milkweed people have dogs and they've got a growing in their gardens plus you can put it in pots and and you know you don't just saying okay do you want to quickly wrap up what's wrong with putting tropical oh my god guys okay need to finish that okay go ahead with the tropical moment well because like anything else that that gets into the the ecosystem if it's not indigenous it takes over and you don't want to worry even though we're giving them a problem the problem is is that the tropical milkweed doesn't die back at the end of the season so the monarchs stay they stick around kills them no it doesn't kill them they just they just stick around so they don't fly off to mexico where they need to go so the the regular milkweeds you know died back and then they go okay you're making this hard now you got to get the right milk weeds or the monarchs die you know what you can use regular whatever they sell at the at the at the nursery just cut them back at the end of the season or if you want to keep your monarchs get the tropical and they'll just hang around your house yeah this monarch saving business is way too no i have all my i have all of my milkweed in pots because i don't have enough dirt in my backyard all right you want to do you guys want to do some slang sure okay here's your bonus let's introduce you to some some slang first and then we can decide which one's going to be your 100 bonus today okay are you brought notes i i always bring things it's always interesting i should get a pen so i can write down okay here what what is king [ __ ] king [ __ ] like let's say s-h-i-t dad dad washed the dishes he was on some king [ __ ] um some kind of high king [ __ ] a high as k-i-n-g motivated some kind of like dad brought home the good milkweed he's on some king [ __ ] on the good list when a man does something good he's doing king [ __ ] all right i got most of it there king [ __ ] how would you just how would you i i get it but i'm trying to figure out how i could [Music] define it he's just doing a good deed he's on something he's doing what he should do he's a king he's a king he's on some king [ __ ] okay bestie you know the best he is yes best friend yeah thick with two c's t-h-i-c-c thick someone who's heavy or well it's more specific than that mommy muscular muscular it's it's fat and all the right places creating sex okay your royal thickness you could say [Laughter] big mad big mad big mad that's a really man i planted a fan planted milkweed in the backyard and his dog ate it and died he was big mad at me yeah really mad really yeah big mad big man extremely pissed okay that's easy vibe you guys know what vibe yeah drip this is a good one trip like he's a direct drip not that he is a drip what does that mean he's a drip yeah meaning he's not he's like um is that a weirdo a drip someone who's who's like no it's used as an adjective so he's got no charm he's a direct dripping or you could say he's got drip or he's dripping expression too meaning someone who's not really with it or not that's what i just said style kind of out of it he has no charisma it means the exact opposite if someone's got drip it means they've got a badass outfit ah or swag okay drip a drip she's dr you would say to ela like i'm dripping in my jeweler yeah i'm dripping in my you're dripping you're dripping hard with that i even say you're flexing on me with this whoa yeah okay so let's do today our our bonus word for the day could be no i think either king [ __ ] or drip what do you think dan uh i think king shit's gonna be easier to find a way to weave in i don't think we're doing any fashion reviews today okay so let's do king [ __ ] okay okay all right that should be easy [Laughter] to remember king [ __ ] okay so today i have a special assignment for you actually we're doing are you smarter than a fifth grader oh god we're doing advice and we're also going on omegle to make a friend for you because i figure you got into a tiff with your friends from after the last episode you guys kind of had a fight about the straws and about vaccines and you there was some drama a little yeah maybe yeah all on my side yeah exactly but regardless i feel like you know maybe it's a good opportunity for you to look for some new friends and so i want to go so there's just old friends no but i know but you can never have too many friends you can never have too many friends that's true and so there's this website omegle oh megel where you connect to it and you match with random people and so i'm thinking let's set you up these are just for friends right this isn't like no it's not for sex it's not a dating site or anything it can be whatever you want don't look at me i have no idea what it is okay what's it called driggle and so we're going to connect to a megal and your assignment today is to make a genuine connection with somebody i want you to exchange emails or phone numbers and then actually make a genuine connection with somebody where you can follow up with them and be friends with them after the show okay all right sounds very dangerous well yeah yeah it can be that's part of the experience right well just give them ethan's address be honest let's be let's vet them you just say for yourself if this is someone you want to be friends with or not i mean because they can tell you anything that you want to hear yes they could i'm being difficult just give them email you don't have to get you don't have to give them the phone number okay so so try to exchange emails that's safe we come from yeah let's say with emails is there anyone over 18. of course of course dad how dare you like i said i don't even know what it is before we get to that my dad did bring in a mystery link for me i don't know what it is i'm gonna open it so i don't know my dad's got some kind of mystery beef or something so here it is okay i think that says it all right there this is uh kind of in response to some of the back and forths and some of your grievances many of which are justified about my lack of being father of the year a few times and issues that we've had back and forth um you know which i've taken some grief for online i was out surfing the web as many 70 year olds do and looking for ethan's name and i came across a podcast you had done uh two bears in a cave with your friend uh who's tom segura tom segura thank you uh and i watch it was very interesting nice to get a different perspective and oh no i know what this is because ethan had said my dad never taught me anything we never did anything fun all he did was take me to baseball games and stab beach balls with knives never we never did anything good never learned anything so i was watching this podcast and towards the end something interesting came up that i thought i'd like to share just to maybe give the fans a different side of ethan's upbringing okay fair enough it's only fair i know exactly what this is and i knew you were going to love this so here it is shout out to my dad and please notice he always feels to me i was just going to say ethan struggles to even say this as he's about to say my dad so i wanted to point that out you always feel to me like you have a real like clear moral compass like i feel like you're a good gage for like right and wrong i've i've even asked you like you think this is the right thing to do and like what why do you think that you don't fear what so many people do which is like getting on the bad side of somebody with influence oh [ __ ] autism i don't know i had this all the way down mom ruined your moment dad [ __ ] yeah thanks cancel it cancel the video did you guys work this out before we started shooting oh my gosh i actually hit dial on my phone all right i'll go back a little bit dad so you you get all the you get all the props i don't know why do you this is gonna cause a real fight after the show dad's gonna be like why didn't you mute your phone tom continue please think that you don't fear what so many people do which is like getting on the bad side of somebody with influence autism i don't know high functioning autism i i don't know what's the answer yeah yeah no that's a legit answer i wish i knew i mean if i'm thinking you know grow i i don't know i feel growing up there was like um that was like a big part of like growing up mm-hmm it's like do the right thing always do the right thing yeah but you do i i i always read that from you thank you i try and it's always like do so so there's that part of me and i think there's another part of me that just doesn't like to take [ __ ] from people there we go so okay shout out that do the right thing dammit thank you that's kind of important that's an important lesson i would say do the right thing oh absolutely thank you for that was one thing you hammered into me all right and another one was do as i say not as i do that i got from my parents do the right thing damn it thank you that was actually a really interesting question from tom because i've never been asked that and i was like i don't know yeah people don't really stir [ __ ] like i do and it doesn't scare i'm just i don't know why i guess maybe i should be more scared of it i am being sued like i am being sued right now and they just added a new complaint too which should be fun so really yeah we're going to talk about that this week well when you do the right thing you feel good about what you're doing and you believe in yourself until someone sues you till feels good until the consequences come yeah he's going ryan cavanaugh aside we're going to talk about he's going after ila and teddy fresh what i know it's [ __ ] awesome what a dick it's water why why they made this really thin it's not thin it's non-existent argument about how teddy fresh is an alter ego company based on nothing alter egos when somebody sets up basically a fake company to hide their assets and make them personally unlock rely on it's so not true exactly it's based on literally nothing so it's just like more scare tactics and intimidation and trying to scare us into thinking like that what a wicked man oh thank you mom i agree i mean that's one way to put it yeah he's going after eli klein elast company teddy fresh that's just wicked i can't even it's wicked it is yeah that's a good word for it what is wrong with him ryan kavanagh well um i'm not a psychologist but like probably i mean i'm mommy i'm gonna give him a diagnosis but like i mean he does look like harvey weinstein we'll get into that later yeah all right that would do it you could start by diagnosing harvey weinstein and then saying well he looks like him anyway um yeah we're gonna go to break when we come back my mom is gonna be finding new friends on a megal and i can't wait this would be interesting this summer get the most out of your travels abroad by learning the language of your destination with babel the number one selling language learning app from ordering in restaurants or asking for directions gaining a deeper understanding of the culture babel makes the whole process of learning a new language addictively fun and easy with bite-sized lessons you can actually use in the real world babel is a can't miss travel essential mom mom when you were in mexico you used it to learn spanish i did before we we left for mexico i i was studying with babel and it really helped me get on the road to start learning really yeah you were saying how like they keep using the same words they do you the lessons right and so you keep on get you get words reinforced because you continue using words that you've already learned genius even the babble's 15-minute lessons make it the perfect way to learn a new language on the go and unlike the infamous language classes you took in high school babel has designed their courses with practical real-world conversations in mind things you'll get used to in everyday life other language learning apps use a.i for their lessons but babel lessons are created by over 100 language experts their teaching methods have been scientifically proven to be effective and with babel you can choose from 14 different languages including spanish french italian and german plus babel's speech recognition technology helps you improve your 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searches all the internet for a coupon and bob is your [ __ ] uncle if you don't know that you just saved a bunch of money for literally doing nothing this happens i can't emphasize how often this happens when me and hilar are shopping clothes shoes whatever it is it's usually clothing because either buys a lot of clothing let's be honest um and it's like you're just you're shopping you're getting ready to pay full price and then all of a sudden honey comes down with like a 25 that's that money yeah it's crazy you know i'll tell you how much it adds up they've found its 17 million members over 2 billion in savings that's a lot uh hit the jeff bezos laughing uh thank you dan so if you don't already have honey you could be straight up missing out on free savings it's literally free and installs in a few seconds and by getting it you're going to be doing yourself a solid and supporting this podcast so we love that great i wouldn't recommend something i don't use and trust me i use honey all the time so get honey for free at junehoney.com families it does that's the that is it right then yeah it says the wrong thing here so get honey for free at joinhoney.com families that's join honey.com families okay we're back and we're about to go on omegle so my mom doesn't know anything about omegle so the first thing you should learn is that even we are on um the monitored side of this right um there is a chance a good chance that you're gonna see a man's penis today what dan's recommended and i'll try my best to avoid that happening oh i don't think i like this segment no it's going to be great i prom i'm going to do my i'm going to work overtime to make sure you don't see any junk oh look like dan said if you see someone covering the camera with their hand there's a good chance the junk is coming oh my god okay why do they even have this website this is this sounds very people connect with men's penises oh god all right let's see though this this is good this is this is good right dan good to start yeah yeah all right i acknowledge blah blah blah nobody cares nobody reads confirm here we go all right mom here's your first friend oh that's weird wow that was weird i'll talk to her it looked like someone's arm my dad was interested what was it well they moved on already okay i swear if someone just whips it out and i'm just like hey guys what's going on oh are we on the radio are we on the radio um you're not on the radio no but we are on a youtube show featuring my mom oh they've burned down the radio well they're just stupid enough to think radio has specialized radio since windows mom's gonna find out and we're gonna be in trouble hey dude bro i know you were in that robe you you're singing a couple dude don't lie to me you're about to whip your [ __ ] oh god i don't want to see this dude why are you wearing a robe you're making me nervous this is this is so so sick i can't hear what you're saying oh he's british that robe is is yeah oh lord what what is this ethan this is this is i'm trying to find you a friend i'm not sure these are the friends i want to hang with okay here we go hey dude i put down the phone man we're trying to make a connection bro sounds like a horse race it says there's 53 000 plus people out there and i keep getting all the douches hello no that's me that's me oh my god what was that they said that's fake i think maybe they recognized you and thought it was a troll no troll here my mom is hi oh my god that kid was like two he was so young where's teddy this is so bizarre oh my god we're getting absolutely skipped on wow nobody wants to talk to you well yeah i'm a 65 year old lady who the heck wants to kill i mean it's kind of an interesting looking situation you'd think people would be curious dude it's what the [ __ ] it's all spam dicks it's crazy out here hey dude hello is this life hi we are i hope you're not gonna whip anything out no no i can say that normal person oh thank god it's incredible to meet a normal person on here how are you i'm so glad to see some actually people me too yeah yeah how are you what are you doing go ahead mom i'll let you connect wow well we're on a podcast my son's podcast and he thought it would be a a great way for me to meet new friends and uh you're the first normal person that we've uh come across thank you you're a second and so um why what com what what do you guys have in common maybe i don't know well you look a lot younger than i i am are you in school are you do you have a career you're probably gonna be surprised when i tell you my age people don't believe me but i'm 35. he's 35. okay that's the same age as your son that's a great that's very interesting okay almost i'm 36. okay what's your name may i ask oh okay uh do you know the female name valerie yes so in my country we have a male version there so i'm valerie but male version but it's easy to call me vel val like val kilmer uh yes sort of and and val do you like butterflies um let's ask myself about that but i never asked yourself that well my mom loves butterfly do you have any ques well i i don't know i think we have probably have separate interests but um well i'm very peaceful person yeah well all right val let's cut to the chase let's cut to the chase valve let's see your [ __ ] no please oh god he's kidding that's a joke it's a joke have you been to the united states val have you been to the us okay i can make something uh on my my paper it's kind of fake how many times have you been to the us have you been here never all right so we're at the point my mom doesn't want your email address valtteri you're a nice guy you're very nice there wasn't a you know uh you know girlfriend that's that's amazing that someone with his intellect would be spending his time on something like this mr master of accents thank you pegged eastern europe yep you know who else would give us that run he said yes well that's eastern europe russia it's more like asia a big cut oh wow russia is a gigantic country russia is literally asia it's like an 80 of asia by land mass we're all eastern european my grandparents came from lithuania which would be russia right now no it wouldn't lithuania is his own country right now all right well that was good we made some progress yeah we're looking for a girl yeah i don't think it's going to happen we're not going to find a friend for you no i don't know dude you're [ __ ] in the head bro dude you're really sick you're a sick [ __ ] bro shame on you and to show his face too like damn um hey hey man how are you oh nope i haven't seen one i think you're the only one now you sick [ __ ] i just want to shame all these guys and make them rethink rethink your life dude rethink everything you're doing right now why are they doing it you're you're disgusting what you're doing is not okay you should feel ashamed and you need help i don't even know what i'm looking at maybe it's a good he's looking at the roof because he's got his [ __ ] in his hand [ __ ] you you [ __ ] off you're you are disgusting human being there's kids on this app and you're willing to show them your dick you need serious help you need to talk to a professional you need to reevaluate everything you're doing you should feel deeply ashamed of yourself what do we have to do to get demonetized i don't think we've done it what is that what am i looking at dude all these people are all freaks and this is the moderated side too there's a moderator not well let's go to this children oh lord what are your children doing on this she knows you you can make friends with with a young girl looking for a role model yeah but i feel fearful for her with what we i agree with well ask her what she's doing here i know how come you're on here what did she say hello may i ask you guys a question please we can't see you they're hiding my camera's too high this is a mom would you like to say anything to the i think women i think you girls should not be on the that they should they hunt they don't have it there's somebody yeah show me something i don't want to say oh here you go mom hey oh my god another a normal person yeah this is a normal young lady how are you oh what a burn oh no [ __ ] was that great bestiality bass pro shop it's all i need to see dude i know you're a douche i saw the bass pro shop hat bro you can't hide it oh my god i saw the hat bro don't try to act like you didn't show it it's a pretty small hat if you're covering up your junk with that dude you're good wow this is gee let's go to the unmoderated site i didn't want to know bro i know exactly oh my god this is the moderated site you know who are these parents that are letting their children well they don't know they don't know nobody's letting anybody on here isn't there someone who can block it that's crazy um are we sure we're on the moderated side i don't even know what that is yeah i think so what's up you [ __ ] sick creep i know exactly what you're doing you've psycho what is that he's covering the camera with a blanket cause guess what he's got his dick hey dude get a life wow get a life hey freak i know exactly what you're doing this is kind of fun just shaming all these people oh god hey dude hi wow it's a normal person so nice to see you lord how many penises have you seen before you got to us how are you so far so good very good where are you from you know what dude peace and love but i'm out i knew that wasn't going anywhere yeah so see what happens when you assume i know you're jerking it i love shaping these lunatics at least okay that's well that looks real yeah and that's on the moderated site that yeah i know i i can't imagine what you're doing why are we doing this this is fun oh my god okay sorry how are they allowing hey dude i didn't expect it to be such a [ __ ] show oh my lord but now i'm too committed to the segment oh god i'm not committed to this segment at all hold on maybe hey dude uh oh no dude you're such a [ __ ] creep i just like hi that says los angeles uh los angeles it does say los angeles that was fake that was a fake stream hey you sick [ __ ] i just like to say that i think someone watching porn is much safer to society and to themselves in general yeah shout out for porn compared to oh yeah yeah oh totally all day this is especially like teams can i ask you a serious question what is wrong with you man you seriously are disturbed if you're on here can i see her bobs he wants to see her boobs mom or bobs can i see her bobs dude you got to get a life bro i mean really get your [ __ ] together [Laughter] hey dude you're sick [ __ ] you gotta get your [ __ ] together right why why right now get your [ __ ] together oh you don't have your dick out he looks unconscious he he's hiding in a closet you don't have your dick out right now i don't believe that no no okay what's going on man good for you why are you browsing in the dark it seems kind of odd he looks like he's in his pajamas i like that peeling the peeling paint in the background and that in that place oh my god well that's someone that wasn't naked probably it's a kid they're children oh my god maybe i should try to add a tag back this is terrible that there's chocolate [ __ ] strongly advised to uh to use the tags okay let's try to do significantly what it is is the amount of uh penises you will see yeah wow oh it worked immediately hey guys no they know you we are live look who it is we're real we're real peaceful you're joking stop can i take a picture can i please take a picture they know you no photos you have to email me money no you can take a photo i'm just kidding of course you can okay i really thought i'm sorry i oh my gosh i mean i'm filming you guys you know that right who is that yeah i don't some fans i think there's some fans of each other do you want to you want to talk to them well you know who are you guys yeah what how come you guys are on this site my mom's worried about you i am i'm really worried we were watching you know what yeah we're just trying to find some chill cool people just some cool people to hang out well then you're not going to like us wow wow that was harsh that was really hard well he said he's looking for chill cool people and i thought not us hey dude donna what he thinks yes i know but it's inappropriate dad is getting on my face for more i know what to say don't worry dude it's an interview this is an interview you're being interviewed right now what are we looking at is that the floor on the ceiling whatever it is i'm not into it there we go hi my mom's trying to make a friend oh my god brutal hello nobody wants to make a friend with someone's mom they're doing the tick tock tag you think they want to be on a show that's the whole point i got to skip people [ __ ] hi guys hi this is my mom she wants to be friends with you who is that i don't know but they're excited mom talk to them why are you so excited why are you girls so excited there's nowhere no no we're from families i'm the frenemies guys wrong show families your family don't get to know my mom at all this is families mom ask them a question i uh how old are you guys no not that we don't want to know you don't want it you don't want to know that we have another question what are you girls i'm not going anywhere hey hi my mom wants to be friends with you how do you know somebody looks like they're tired are you sleepy it's 12 14 a.m it's 12 14 a.m this is my mom she's looking to make a friend on omegle so here you go hit it off wait so okay oh hey dude not our type oh that's too many oh ethan this is a terrible segment this is awful we're getting closer though we're getting closer the fans will be the judge of that oh lord hold on let's find one more good i'd rather be talking to to little puppy dogs or something i'd i didn't realize that was on the table oh my god you [ __ ] monster oh god that was so gross trouble hey did you call me gross we were watching something from a previous woman gross oh you called my mom that's my mom actually i [ __ ] you then i am very sorry because uh you know mom you are beautiful because i was about to go off on you buddy if you you don't want to know that someone before you was showing their private parts mom can i have your sniff jelly well that's why we're here actually why do you have a brillo pad on your head to me that's not nice gary he wants you he asked for it no no sorry that's a no for my mom's you're not hurting how much how old are you how old are you i'm 65. no would have been better if he guessed oh really you look pretty good he wants to do a 69 with you apparently oh you know what dude you're [ __ ] you're a pig bro you are disgusting how dare you speak to my mother that way hey dude oh this looks promising lord oh you sick man you are sick don't want to see hey dude no no what are you on the floor what is this back on the floor it's designed really on the floor cheat vinyl you got there dan thinks it's funny it's got it is fun it's good i want to just find one genuine connection on all of them we have to find one genuine connection this is not good king [ __ ] give me this give me a case i'll [ __ ] you no he wants a kiss he says give me a kiss give me kiss suck my dick i was like okay i'm watching spongebob okay cool enjoy that spongebob my generation oh my god did you see the uh h3 teddy fresh collab with spongebob maybe we could have sold some uh you want me to sling some merch yeah sell some merch hey no no no no how close are we to seeing your dick right now on a scale of one to ten [Music] yeah ten ten stop this is torture hey man he knows you my mom's trying to make a friend you want to say hi to my mom [Music] hi hi you know what it looks like one of those beanies on your head that's spinning with the fan on the ceiling it's right above them doesn't it it's like the inspector gadget kind of yeah yeah yeah yeah it's got to be one of those you know who is it i think i might know you you might i think you get one guess you get one guess are you h h two h two h two h you're one off one three number h3 all right we'll skip on him you got it wrong hi my mom's trying to make a friend hi hi girls how are you i'm i'm good you girls are i don't know where you are are you having a sleepover what is it seems pretty dark behind you it's my birth it's my birthday today oh happy birthday happy birthday congratulations what a nice uh what a nice day for you mom would you like to uh i don't even know what to what did you get for your birthday there you go um i got a picture of me and my dad so recently um my dad had passed away with cancer oh i'm so sorry to hear that i got a picture of me and him oh my goodness that's great where are you what part are you in the states yeah you you speak english well are you are you an american yes okay so how how recently did your dad pass away sounds like pretty recent november wow i'm so sorry to hear that my goodness well it happens it happens wow what do you say to something like that i don't know well i you know i i hope that that you take this experience and it it keeps you close to your mom and that you you know you uh you take his memory and keep it with you forever and and excel in everything that you do and have nothing but good fortune thank you she sounds like a mother doesn't she yeah well you know so what do you guys do anything else fun for your birthday um we're going out to eat at this place by my house we did this painting thing oh yeah we did like a fun painting thing so we have these like canvases my sister set it up and stuff and like we start painting on a canvas and then we rotate and add to somebody else's campus oh that's fun that sounds fun yeah can i do something i don't know if you know me i'm i'm on youtube kind of a famous guy kind of a big deal if you google ethan klein or h3h3 you'll find me i want to buy you a birthday present oh that's so sweet again you don't have to no i want to buy you something special oh no google me you can see you can see that i'm a real person that's your sister next to you there say your name again ethan klein h3h3 production k-l-e-i-n yes and so you guys don't think i'm a creep or something but you know what it sounds like it's such a special birthday for you and i just feel like i really want to do something special for you did you find him did you find us look under the podcast h3 podcast families mom [Laughter] i think what do you want free what do you what's something you you want for your birthday like uh like if you could have anything you wanted for your birthday like a gift like a physical gift what what would you like i don't really know okay well what's your favorite store to shop at uh american eagle air hostel okay i'm gonna get you a heat i'm gonna get you like well you know i bet you some of the teddy fresh like these shirts would she would like oh yeah daddy fresh well i'm not trying to sling my merch no i'm just i'm just scared you know what um i'm gonna you email me i'm gonna get buy you a thousand dollar gift card to american eagle oh wow wow i want you to have a good way i really do want you to have a good birthday he will do that please i want to do that for you well follow up and and write it right down my email is write it down get a pencil and paper right now wow happy birthday happy birthday and i want you to go and have a really great time shopping and buying whatever you want them yeah thank you yeah you're welcome okay so send that email okay happy birthday to me okay happy birthday guys happy birthday thank you so much yeah bye girl you're probably the nicest person on here well yeah yeah you know what you shouldn't be on here there's a lot of weirdos that was so nice of you that was very king you were on your king ship [Applause] wow i'm just giving out money everywhere you actually nailed that that was a perfect execution perfect executive good job wow well that's about as good of an exchange as we could have hoped to get out of omegle so all right enough for megalo i've given out enough advice on omegle to all the guys out there good let's give out let's give out advice that people are actually asking for okay i'm ready and everybody's favorite ask mom dear mom you really want to be your dear abby well i do you like dear abby was that something you were into as a kid because you bring that up a lot i do yes really um no not really i mean i you know i i don't i don't think i read or call them dear mommy like dear abby yeah a little weird with the mommy okay yeah let's just move forward all right [Laughter] okay sorry about that how to be okay with my boyfriend never wanting to get married this is an interesting question hi donna and ethan both of you are married so maybe you can help my boyfriend and i are in a stable committed relationship we love each other and work well however he says marriage is never going to be on the table he had divorced parents and his first marriage failed he wants us to be completely separate i said um i suggested just a name change no legal wedding and that too was crossing a boundary he said he will never buy me jewelry because he sees it as proof to other people of his love he says we are already family nothing else matters am i just being silly about how upset i am you want to crack at that well um first she has to ask herself a question which is people are joking by the way that your advice is always dump them no no no well you know she has to ask herself a joint one step dump him yeah no she she has to ask herself does she want children how does he feel about that okay because that's that's an important issue you know there are some famous people like goldie hawn and kurt russell that never got married but they are both financially wealthy so they don't care you know it's not like your average joe where you are invested in your financial stability and and and lean on each other uh for security there's also gene simmons and what was your name why does it matter if you're really famous people are married or well because they're they're so wealthy that to them they don't care like you want to be fine if not who cares but they did both of them had children and you know they have normal from what we can do from what we know um is she is she being silly about how upset she is no i don't think i could handle being with the man who said that to me i mean not even buying her jewelry that's that's the part that was a red flag for me it's like i understand that he has trauma and uh um uh commitment issues right he has his parents he got a divorce once it sounds like it must have been really traumatic for him his parents were divorced i'm assuming at an early age that can be really traumatic and so at to a certain extent i can uh i can empathize with somebody saying you know what i'm happy to commit to you but i don't want to get married okay so i get that but the part where he loses me a little bit is when he says he's not even going to buy you jewelry see that that to me is like makes me think like well what is that about well plus you know it depends on where you live i know california um observes like if you if you're you know common law marriage from a different state i'm not sure if you move in together in california if it's considered common law but i mean he wants to keep everything separate um their finances i mean it's almost like you know friends with benefits that's all it really is well that's kind of harsh but you know no seriously i mean well they're dating they're dating a friend with a benefit is someone you just screw and well didn't they say that they would live together didn't they just buy they committed did they buy a house together what did they say no nothing like that oh well i thought oh you have notes i have confused it wait what it read this read this read it again you want me to read the whole thing again read the whole thing again she's in a relationship with her boyfriend right they're stable committed okay however marriage is not on the table his parents were divorced right he wants everything separated i suggested a name change with no legal wedding he says no to that he won't even buy me jewelry because he sees it as proof of other people so they're not even living together that's uncertain i'm assuming they are why would you assume that if everything's separate i think she just means like banking and stuff like that here's my advice i dump them we need to dump them no you know it it's like he's got issues he's got issues i i mean i think that when a man falls in love with a woman that's the bottom line and he's not going to say that it's like do you not want to get married do you not want to get married to me i wouldn't go that far he can be in love with you he has got a lot of trauma and so you're going to have to make a decision you know these are lines he's cros he's clearly laid out and he's told you he's communicated to you very clearly these are my boundaries so in one respect we have to appreciate that he's communicating his boundaries to you so now the ball is in your court are these boundaries that you're going to be able to live with i don't know how old you are how many more how much longer you have to find another partner stuff like this stuff kind of enters in the equation a little bit if you're young you know and this is something if you want if getting married means so much to you the big question is do you question his love and loyalty to you right because if you do then everything else is performative is this someone you trust to be a lifelong partner to you through thick and thin then you know if if you're questioning that then then i'm with my mom and we're going to say hand on the button [Music] yeah that's a toughy though are you is it silly how upset you are no of course not it's you're not it's not silly i'm so you're at all you're completely entitled and the fact that you are upset shows me that you're concerned in some way about the legitimacy of the relationship and because he's so clearly laid out his boundaries i wonder how old he is yeah i don't know i'm afraid for these the long-term stability of your relationship i agree dad's raising his hand i know this is the mom answers gives advice but i see the problem as he has no skin in the game so at any time he could just say okay we're done by out so there's no there's no investment on his part in the relationship it seems like right right well that's where it comes like do you trust this person to be a lifelong partner or is this someone you're afraid he's just gonna skip out and so look look being married doesn't mean it's like commitment is is uh an emotional thing being married doesn't force anyone to stay you know right it makes things complicated if you want to leave but like ultimately do you trust this man it seems like you don't yeah and the whole thing with i'm never gonna buy you jewelry [ __ ] that that's that's so busy you don't want to get married buy your girl something just show commitment right yeah i'm sorry he he needs to see a psychiatrist oh my mom coming in with well he's got issues you know what i think i think we're going to see this guy's dick on omega couple years i don't know all right next one oh what is it creepy boss uh oh my boss is a man in his mid-50s he constantly talks about what a cool guy he was sounds like michael scott right off the bat i was such a cool guy and he tells stories about his youth that are similar to something you find in an old 80s movie if you needed a dictionary definition of incel he'd be the perfect candidate he asked if female employees have nudes on their phones and if he can see them he also asks if we know what only fans is and if we or anyone we know has one he saves pictures of our female employees on the work laptop without thinking anyone can see he's a creep that's really bad at hiding it he defends bill cosby and other serial predators by saying he doesn't understand how someone's so rich and famous needs to drug girls to get them i'm already looking for a new job but i feel so guilty leaving my co-workers with this guy i want to make a report but i'm scared he'll know it's me what should i do tough well you want it you want to take a crack at it first sure sure mom um well you know first of all there's so many different levels of of of creepy and and someone who is harassing you at the workplace and so how do you rate that i mean well first of all he hasn't physically you know touched her well clearly there's no hr that he must be the the owner of the company otherwise if you have a human resources i mean he's done so many things that would get well you don't know that it's hard to know you don't know that you know he it's like he walks the line you know where he knows he can't physically touch them otherwise he's in trouble although you know he's way over the line he's way over the line yeah you know i was like he's way out this morning dad had stephanie miller on the radio and there's uh dr wendy walsh she's got a podcast on iradio and it's called mating matters and she talks about a lot of these different issues she actually was a model when she was young and um she was molested by by the guy that was the boss of the way you wrote that up like williams thing no i mean and she she talks about the different levels of being okay so what's this creep guys what's the creep level on this guy on a scale of one to ten in your opinion well she needs to get out of the environment it's not a healthy environment that's that's definitely free if that's her boss what should i do can i well if there's someone above him she can certainly talk to uh his superior but if he's the boss if he has something to that that ruins you know her uh her professional uh um what am i what do i want to say i mean you know he could a lot of people can can go ahead and put out a word and really really stifle your your ability to get another job she's afraid that's what she says she says i want to make a report but i'm scared he'll know it's me here's what you need to do this guy's a sick [ __ ] she needs to leave there's a lot of red flags in here most of all is asking females for nudes yeah that's that's even worse is saving pictures of female employees on his desktop that's creepy um this guy is off this guy is he's a predator he might be a predator based on what i'm seeing like he hasn't touched them but right i don't know if that's something that's on the table but regardless of his touch i mean this is not just not a safe and working environment so i understand you wanting to leave and i understand but here's the thing this is a sticky situation right where it's not really putting you in a fair position because on one hand you it sucks that you're gonna have to put a stick out your neck and potentially deal with the consequence of this guy either trying to prevent you from getting a job or whatever he's gonna do about you that you're afraid of it's like the it's like the victim mentality of like right you if i i now now i feel like i have to protect the people that are there or i'm going to feel guilty for just moving on and not so you're in a shitty situation what is this what's what what what do you do what would you do well unfor i think the right thing to do is to say something right because ultimately you're kicking the can down the road for someone else to potentially become a victim of his but you know it's [ __ ] up because he's putting you in this position so you know why why do you need to risk your neck for something you didn't even do so like the right thing to do is to say something the safe thing to do is to not say something so you know and and by the way it's like i don't know what this guy's capable of so it's hard for me to say the cost of doing the right thing in this case or not but i'm not gonna blame you for just moving on because a lot of people don't want to deal with this [ __ ] and frankly it's his [ __ ] fault so those are the two options the right thing and the safe thing well a lot of times guys will say really stupid things they're just weirdos and they are creepy beyond that though you're giving him a benefit of the doubt he doesn't deserve he's saving pictures of the employees yeah that's kind of creepy he's asking if they had new photos they can show him if if there is a superior oh you know someone above him i think she should have a talk with his superior if he's the boss then she needs to just you know without saying anything just put out her feelers and try to find another job and as far as her co-workers that are left behind they're aware of what's going on if if she's had that that experience so have they yeah we'll talk to them you know i mean because obviously that's not a good environment and if he is not yeah that guy needs to go man that guy is a danger too i don't think if if the if if there was someone above him and they knew that he was he was acting like that that's a lawsuit waiting to happen oh for sure you know they need to get rid of him so she needs to be honest if there is someone above him well that's what i'm saying this is the right thing to do and the same thing to do and ultimately you're gonna have to weigh the pros and cons of what to do i don't know i really don't know dnc versus principal the truth is that if you move on and don't say anything and this guy ends up assaulting someone or doing something like that you're going to feel guilty and my thing in life is the oh i don't ever want to feel guilty about any decision i ever made so i i like to move forward with a clean conscience so whatever's gonna make you move forward thinking like i did the right thing and i'm not gonna feel guilty about what this guy did to other people no it's not your responsibility but personally that's my advice do the right thing [ __ ] this guy you'll find another job and if you have an hr department they will keep you anonymous right like this guy never heard of the me too well i think i don't think she's in that situation she seems pretty certain he'll know it was her so depends on the size of the company well it depends on who's who's i mean if if whoever's in charge above this guy if he's a real bozo too look uh based on what she said she says he's probably gonna know it was me okay so thank you peace and love good luck with that [ __ ] that guy that guy's a creepy [ __ ] dude yeah that's what a douche men are gross sorry damn anyone except for the good ones except for the men on omegle of course the men on a mega are the only good ones out there oh god oh freaks men are such freaks jeez how do you even date how do you even be with men what a disaster you have to keep propagating the species we gotta you put it yeah you kiss a lot of frogs that drive women are saints man they just they do it all they carry they carry the whole of humanity on their back we do [Laughter] all right here we go real foot fetishizer oh this is this is interesting all of my life i've always had a thing for feet lately the media has been making it out to seem like foot fetishes are bad and i've become too scared to tell anyone that i have a thing for feet should i continue to hide my fetish or just come out of the closet as they say or in this case the uh well i think if he's dating a woman i don't think he should come right out and say i've got weird food uh foot fetishes until he dates her and he realizes that she likes him and they end up going out a couple times and then he needs to come out of the closet and be honest with her she needs to come out you need to tell her now could you take yourself i mean how how when you say foot fetish yeah like how fetish yeah how much are we talking about yeah because like if you're being intimate with a woman and you start doing stuff with her feet i don't think that's a big deal like i feel like that's in the realm of like i mean a lot of it's like a little outside normal but it's enough to just to like handle but are we talking about like yes mistress like you're at a restaurant you're like yes mistress that's a little weird like we have to you know what i mean some guys like to paint their their partner's toes i have a feeling that's only the beginning of what this is you know but i mean if he wants to do something sexual with her feet maybe she'd be into it exactly he needs to just be honest with her my thing is like feet fetishing is something that i think most of all the fetishes that have i feel like this is one of the easiest to digest for your partner like if you want to do weird [ __ ] to her feet it's like i don't think she's going to object to that if that's what you're in well yeah and if she does and he's okay all right there's limits i can go so far with you and that's fine i don't think that i think you're good i don't i don't think you need to work i don't know just go out with her i mean do you have like i don't know and then you're talking about you have pictures of feet all over your house because that's bad that's hard to explain because he makes it sound like it's such a big deal are you in defeat are you like how in defeat are we talking no you don't need to be scared i think i think and also foot fetish fetishism is very popular i mean in terms of i know that like there's a lot a lot of guys are just like wiki feet hello yeah we have a society that has wiki feet so how forbidden can it be i actually don't think you need to be embarrassed by this i think if you just say i'm in defeat you know i think that's off your shoes that's fine you know people some people like sniffing farts and [ __ ] so like yeah oh god oh god you're pretty good yeah pretty good i wouldn't worry about it well what do you mean come out of the closet do you need to go around announcing you have a foot fetish no i wouldn't recommend that i mean you know keep it to yourself to a degree nobody wants to know you know i don't go around saying that i like to uh don't say it i mean if a guy said to me i i love your feet you've got beautiful feet i think that's a compliment yeah you know and if he says oh you know let me paint your toes and i smell your feet okay then it starts getting weird but but you know i mean if he enjoys painting your toes it might be an exotic experience i'm pretty sure but if it gets if it gets really interesting then that's up to the girl if she's okay or not no just just like just be like yo anyway you're good dude trust me don't worry about it man you're fine you know are you chopping feet off like why is it so serious you have feet in your freezer i'm just saying there's different varying levels of foot yeah yeah just keep your [ __ ] together you don't yeah he doesn't sound like he's that off the chain well it's only three sentences so who knows yeah yeah you're good bro just just enjoy yourself find you a girl with some crazy-ass feet that you can just get weird with you'll be happy for life okay i need advice hi donna and ethan how do i tell my boyfriend that he has approximately zero months left to propose until i'm out of here we've been together for 4.5 years and living separate the entire time we recently moved in together and things are doing great we love our house we are enjoying cohabit cohabitation i have a nagging thought in my mind that i've only prolonged the inevitable by moving in without a ring i'm afraid that i may be giving the wifey special when he's only signed up for the girlfriend experience i'm tired of waiting okay when jessica your your ethan's sister was young i always used to say to her you know what if you want to move in with a with your guy that's fine but put a ring on it but she didn't she moved in with brian i moved in i moved in with a way well before we were right things are different uh you know what if she is in love with him and he is in love with her and she feels like i want to get married you know story which i think i've told before so if i'm being redundant you'll have to indulge me a little bit well tell me we'll cut because i don't want okay we're not here to tell stories like that time's over dad dad and i when we were you know we were dating two and a half three years and every night we would say good night to each other and i hated it i just hated it and finally i just said marry me so she doesn't have to wait for him if she feels that strong about it then ask him to marry her you know and if he says no she needs to find out is he just not ready or he just doesn't i mean it's the mere fact that they've moved in together i mean you're saying communicating so there's some key facts left out here you're saying he has zero months left to propose have you guys talked to proposal have you asked him if you if marriage is on the table obviously communication is the key to everything what should you do i mean talk to him tell him you gotta get [ __ ] married you need to know how committed he is the clock is ticking it's time to make a family as a man i don't get the whole commitment issue i really don't understand these people like if i was with somebody and before ela all of my girlfriends were somebody that were like i knew were fine and fun for the time but i knew i didn't want to marry them i would never move in with somebody like that right i would never progress the relationships to the point of moving in together if i knew that there was no long-term prospect in fact i know i wouldn't even date these people for for more than like six months in a year because it's just pointless right you're wasting everyone's time until i met ela i immediately knew this was someone i wanted to marry and so everything else fell into place easily right i don't understand guys that you're gonna spend four and a half years together you're gonna move in together and you're not gonna want to get married like i mean what what is wrong i just don't understand that well that's right that's why i don't think that she should come at it with like an ultimatum like well it sounds like she doesn't want to waste another day well that's why she says zero months left to propose out of here she has no more patience so that's why i would say instead of waiting for him to ask you ask him and if he's if he says no you need to find out do you not want to get married period do you not want to get married to me are you waiting to save money for a ring they just moved into a house i mean there could be a number of just just say look you know that's not a bad idea i know it's not romantic i know it's not what girls dream about everyone wants to think these big beautiful romances or probably look i you guys don't i gave him the ring to eel and a pack of baby wipes okay it doesn't matter the moment doesn't matter it's the life that happens afterwards so don't get caught up with all this romantic [ __ ] and fantasies just say look [ __ ] are we getting married or not no she doesn't have to say it that way just be well sweet and say i love you don't say that verbatim but yeah say i love you let's get married if he says no or he's not ready you know give him a few days to think about it and if he's not changing his mind then it's peace one love see your dick on a mega loser dump him right dump no no no no no no no no no no dump no dump dump them how much more time should she have tested what do you wait well she needs to ask him to marry he said ask and if he says no dump him you got to move on well if if he says he just doesn't want to get married then yeah yeah then he's just gonna what if he gives like another [ __ ] non-committal answer like well you know let's just wait and see stuff like that well give him a timeline and then well she said zero months zero months so what do we say to him well if he's not stopping but if she asks and he and he declines for you know all the wrong reasons then what are the right reasons he's saving for a ring how long is he saving four and a half years how old are they you know i mean if they're young dump dump dump all right dump them yeah thank you but after everything advice on where to store sex toys this is interesting oh there's no place to hide dear ethan and donna my wife and i both love your podcast so much our questions for your too is where would you suggest we store our sex toys so what happened to ethan doesn't happen to our own children that's a great [ __ ] question okay that's actually a really good question yeah well there you know i hid things i thought pretty darn good massive dildo i found was not hidden well it was it was it was it was in a sock it was hidden in my drawers in the top drawer next to your bed that's like the first place a kid's gonna look for weird [ __ ] you know what the only way you're going to keep your kids out of your home no no no they'll still find it i swear jessica's better than the drawer next to your bed lock it up you just have to have a [ __ ] some kind of say you're doing it you have to lock it up you have to have a lock it's like a gun they're going to find it right put it in your drill it is true in your gun yeah you got to put your dildos in your gun safe that's set there's no kids will get into as i have learned you know everything yeah you need a gun just just lock it up that's actually that that is kind of the only right answer if you are that afraid as you should be yes of kids finding your gun your sex toys you're gonna put those you're gonna yeah you're gonna have to lock that up with your gold and uh weapons yep they find it geez i just unbelievable that's amazing though the thought of having like when you're ready to like get into it you have to go to like a safe well keep it up you're gonna need to know this because you you've got one on the way and you got teddy 20 dildo oh gosh it's not valuables i can only imagine a hundred years from now they're crack you know how they like find saves in old houses they're like we're gonna crack open the safe there's gonna be lots of money or checks or relics and they open it up which is a [ __ ] dildo oh god what the hell yeah that's the only thing that's going to be safe that you can be absolutely sure of you put it in a burn proof uh unbreakable scenario right fire yourself years from now aliens are there's going to be some archaeology done when humanity is wiped out and the second humanity 2.0 evolves they're going to come to the rub of your house open this relic can you imagine when you die and your kids have to go into this yeah right now i save it put it in a safe good advice thank you well guys that's about it we had are you smarter than a fifth grader but we'll do that we'll save that for next week i'll probably trivial well well you can have dad like well dad's good at trivia yeah i don't want to go up against dad he'll he'll destroy me but you can have the dad lifeline okay that sounds fair so next week we're gonna do are you smarter than a fifth grader okay and um next week so can i get my report on my butterflies how many do you how many times well i wanted to i wanted this this is the butterfly show dan can you just show the one pic i just wanted to show somebody all right okay just go to the to the chrysalises while we're doing that i'd like to reach out to the uh young lady who sent me a message i think it was on youtube who had worked at a uh i think in chicago somewhere at a ballpark who was booed as were all the other ushers when they tried to take balls away from people and she's her job that reached out to support me and say thank you for doing that you don't have to take the boo she's paid to take the boo i know but this is she appreciated his seeing a car accident and pulling over to hell it's not at all it's exactly really like that exactly anyway reach out to me again with the information so i can mention you next week if ethan lets me thank you with peace and love you're so funny all right what do i got to open the butterfly [ __ ] oh god it butterfly [ __ ] well it's like you know i mean god bless them but come on i just wanted to inform our viewers of something that they can do okay so let me let me open it my discord was closed all right we have butterfly updates um the pet poison helpline reports that milkweed is moderate to severe poisoning in dogs and cats which means get to the vet as soon as you suspect your pet has ingested the plant i'm telling i'm just saying that was what ian sent me well okay yeah thanks ian yeah and now everyone's gonna go oh they're not gonna okay so if you look at closely this chrysalis this caterpillar had attached himself to a leaf on the plant and what happens is sometimes caterpillars with ferocious appetites eat the leaf and it could dislodge the leaf and the whole chrysalis could fall the first day a chrysalis is formed there it's wet and you have to be careful and let it be but as soon as you can what i did is i cut the leaf i don't know if you've got a picture of me holding the leaf ethan this is all i have i think okay you cut you know you hold on to the leaf and you cut it and i had you know a towel and i gently laid the chrysalis down and i used dental floss and what i did was i tied a loop around the very top including the the leaf and once it was it was safe i tied another knot so it leaves like a loop you know and then i took a pin a straight pin and i attached it carefully to the top of the cage and so the chrysalis is safe it won't get dislodged and fall from the plant and it'll stay there until it's ready to be born this is the photo it's pretty blurry but let's see well that's me holding after i cut it and then there's one showing well i mean that's pretty that's pretty hot you could write a book about this [ __ ] mom you're pretty good at it well you know you lay it down i even have a picture of me tying the chrysalis this is pretty cool i'm done you know see you can see that so it's nice and safe i mean you have to be careful there's there it is you make the loop first oh we're working oh we have instructions so yes yes so this one right here which dan's got to send me it okay i wish i got half as much care and attention as this butterflies i rubbed your head this morning when you woke up don't give me that all right i'm set for the next month your father and i chase each other around the bed we like to cuddle okay gross that so you can see you can see the the dental floss around the chrysalis that i'm i'm about to tie and well you can figure it out well it's there for you you know i really want to help but i got so paranoid about the milk we don't get paranoid i'm worried i can't have poison back there no it's not that please i mean the worst that could happen is they would get an upset stomach it literally i just read it says oh i said it says moderate to severe poisoning and dogs and cats as soon as you suspect that's from that's from healthypawpetinsurance.com yeah pet insurance here i'm going to show you something that i i sent you yeah from save the monarchs that's like these people are corrupted no and of course the smaller the dog the greater exactly and we have tiny dogs oh please the info you got is from savethemonarchs.com or whatever i mean this is these people are are here's see here's the different types of milkweeds that you can that you can plant i'm just saying it's it's there's some risk there i don't take any risks the worst thing that could be your dog would throw away you want to know the truth i would rather every monarch butterfly die than shredder gets sick oh that's terrible just the truth although milkweed contains rarely butterfly and shredder dying i would kill them all in heartbeat and i do it every day for the rest of my life it rarely poses any significance to my dog i know i'm on your side [ __ ] the monarch butterflies it rarely no i'm gonna get i'm gonna get hate for saving my dog no it's he's not gonna get butterflies wanna die they just they wanna go rarely poses any significant threats that's from the monarch website these people are are brainwashed this is not this is not uh partial information if you're that concerned put it on the website put it into the website put it in a pot lies monarch joint venture exactly funded by the monarch uh save the exact big monarch money put it in a pot and leave it somewhere high up if you're concerned about your animals or your children you know or in your case you can put it way in the back where teddy doesn't go teddy goes everywhere teddy doesn't climb up way up on top he goes everywhere oh please he'll get into everything you just talked about you have to put a sex toy in a [ __ ] vault and he's not gonna get to the milkweed how about on the hillside across the street i would happily put every monarch butterfly in an incinerator and cause mass genocide on every model you know what i don't understand oleander people put that you know right in our driveway the people next to us there's a giant oleander see that's one thing i think you guys are exaggerating no it's gigantic no i think i don't think oleander is as dangerous oh it's way dangerous no there's been many cases oh my god people died and cooking stuff and okay we're going to get an oleander branch and it's that point you just take a branch of olander stir a pot with it and you will die you can you will die yes oleander is very tough that's weird because it's like everywhere yep it's like was in our front yard like a huge bush it's like all over the place there's a huge bush right outside in our driveway it's huge that that is true i've always heard that about olly anders they're very they're very feel like it has to be overstated how risky it is because how prevalent no no no you can't fact check it when i was a realtor if i was showing someone a house and they had kids and there was oleander you had especially in the backyard i'd say if you buy this house you got to pull this oleander out because it is deadly yep yeah it's true extremely toxic extremely toxic okay so but why are you skeptical about this because why are you dying on this is oh no because this is like it sounds like old folks tales where my dad goes they used it to stir a stew no and everybody died a single leaf can kill an adult human boom well why is it everywhere that seems so insane i mean lots of plants are toxic you just don't eat them yeah well here in southern california they put it on the medians of the freeways it doesn't need a lot of water flowers it looks good we don't care if some people kill the milkweed no the milkweed isn't that weird i'm an anti-monarch but if you can get monsters you're not gonna plant milkweed now well i'm scared for the dogs in theodore ethan i'm just i'm scared go right up the hill and just plant california's doing like a billion dollar milkweed foundation 10 million but what if you could get the monarchs to eat oleander instead of milkweed then that solve your problem then i gotta plant only in there in my backyard no can't they just eat like [ __ ] uh ivy you know what i'm saying like figure it out they don't eat ivy they eat milkweed how about eat like uh an oak leaf dumbasses a daisy ivy is mildly poisonous by the way oh get that out of here there's always you know plants that's how that's their defense they have to be somewhat well you know a lot of plants milkweed is not if if teddy were to put milkweed leaf in his mouth i nothing would happen if shredder ate a gob of milkweed he probably would end up getting really sick but he wouldn't die okay doctor let's take a chance yeah again i'm sure yeah i'm sure you know exactly what would and he's not and he's a veterinarian and you know what it it probably would taste awful he wouldn't want to even eat it well that's there's only one way to find out guys thank you for watching frenemy families family strike that yowza families thank you for watching families we'll be back next week as always with are you smarter than a fifth grader are you smarter than a fifth grader god i hope so i'm saying yes going out on a limb yeah i think you do i think you don't well we'll see we'll see um so thank you guys once again regular schedule that means off the rails and after dark coming as usual teddy fresh on instagram thursday 10 am you know what it is thanks for watching smash that like button ciao everyone

Channel: H3 Podcast

Views: 1,313,826

Rating: 4.8970418 out of 5

Keywords: h3 podcast, h3h3 podcast, the h3 podcast, the h3h3 podcast, h3h3productions, h3h3, h3, ethan klein, hila klein, ethan and hila, ethan & hila, families

Id: sBknX8jMuGw

Length: 104min 48sec (6288 seconds)

Published: Wed Jul 28 2021

Reddit Comments

[u/donotseekthetreashur]

Donna's king shit drop was so epic lmfao

[u/donotseekthetreashur]

Half of this podcast is Ethan saying "HEY YA SICK FUCK HOW DO YOU LIVE WITH YOURSELF" lol

[u/riiiiseup]

Im tearing up at the final Omegle call. Ethan is such a nice guy "On God!" and Donna's "King Shit" line at the end made it all the better

[u/donotseekthetreashur]

Dan should've added a graphic overlay as a counter to show the number of dicks they'd seen. It's insane how many they skipped lol

[u/Thehobbitsatisengard]

The part with the little girl whose father passed away had me tearing up! So wholesome in a sea of Ethan cyber bullying and dicks being exposed

[u/toonamagoopy]

Also, the kid recognizing Ethan from Frenemies was priceless, and H2H2 - fucking dead

[u/mysteryquackman]

I hope that girl follows up and for the gift card.

[u/TholomewPlague31]

It's all fun and dicks until a girl with a recently deceased father gets a brithday present from Ethan.

[u/potatowarrior1]

The audacity of Triller trying to go after Hila and Teddy fresh. Triller is absolute trash.