Not So Sexy Server

if you're like me you love going out to eat like you're hungry and then that server comes around the corner I just get so happy when I see that my friend Mike was a server he got bored one day and bought a car so I'm like yo bro how much how much money you'll be making over there sometimes I go home with a hundred and twenty dollars a night excuse me not even like three days later I Drive by this really popular restaurant in Orlando and I see a little sign outside saying now hiring servers so I go inside talk to one of the managers and these guys hired me on the spot they were telling me we never hire people without experience but we're so desperate so I got the job come in the next day and they sent me to shadow this other server big old black guy and this dude wastes no time are you gonna be a server you gotta know how to multitask you don't know how to juggle you gotta know how to drift in your car you gotta learn how to play the piano you gotta even learn how to defuse a bomb I'm just like good God by the way everybody here is sleeping with everybody we got Buster's sleeping with supervisors supervisors sleeping with servers at one point I went back into the kitchen please don't get it twisted I know Punk I go forward in the paint I walk into this kitchen I felt like I walked into the comments section of worldstar what no you say he want bazinga Dilla with no pico no say he won't get your pika wit night I went home after that first day I called a mic I'm like yo apparently they be having orgies up in this place nah man every restaurant is like that and I worked at a place one time where the females would sexually harass all the males in the kitchen I'm like what the ham hock and p-funk shut the front door go back getting there the second day I'm shadowing this other dude you could tell he was not thrilled to be training me at all okay my name is whatever this is whoever yeah I'm training him so the next day I come into work the supervisor comes up um did you memorize the menu yet there's a test okay um I didn't apply here to get tested I came here to get that paper you gotta have the man you memorize front to back anyways we're so weird we're desperate we're gonna we're gonna skip the last day of training and just and just have you start serving they didn't train me on how to enter stuffing on the computer yet so I didn't want to say anything I felt that would've been a bad time even though it was the perfect time it was a disaster I was forgetting drinks I was messing up orders you know when you're watching the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park figure out how to open doors that's me trying to figure out how this computer works I'm like so I dropped everybody there food one of the tables good um I said mayo on the side this has Mayo kind of on the bun a little bit right there in the corner pull all your hair to your scalp so then the next day I come into work I quit and I feel really bad about that because they were already hurting for help but I don't know how y'all servers do it y'all make it look so easy so please guys there's no excuse for not tipping your servers right there's apps needless to say when I went to apply at my next job I didn't put this restaurant down as a reference [Music]

Channel: sWooZie

Views: 14,812,478

Keywords: swoozie, adande

Id: CI4dTVEyd7g

Length: 3min 34sec (214 seconds)

Published: Sun May 24 2015

Reddit Comments

[u/ChefGuru]

Haha "when I walked into the kitchen, I felt like I walk into the comment section of World Star." Haha

[u/RebelWithoutAClue]

Wow, job shadowed for 2 days and didn't attempt to learn the menu or the POS. He must still be wearing velcro tab shoes.

[u/CosmicRave]

Where are these "everyone is banging everyone" restaurants and where can I get an application

[u/[deleted]]

well that story went fucking nowhere