Not everyone can handle the truth

ladies and gentlemen let me get my self situated here popped on a couple minutes early selves gonna be going live at 9 p.m. Eastern I had to come on here and get it set up doing great Fran don't want great being with everything we have going on in the world I know a lot of people gotta sit still I'm doing the same my family and I doing well everything going great glad to be home and with the family hope you all are doing well and everything is great on your end as a right now we still on for April 11th because it's a small group and we're in a private you know room and we just will be hand sanitizing and clean and if you know I'll let you all know if you're scheduled to come to the life coach certification April 11th which we don't know it's still three weeks out so hopefully things get better but if not if you already have a ticket to go you'll get an email from me I'm just I'm gonna send it just a random I mean a regular email tomorrow just kind of updating you all and I've been some of you have wrote in so I've been able to get some responses to you but hopefully things get better you know I'm keeping the faith so yeah what I wanted to do is I mean where I met my son's their home for two weeks so we stationery only stepping out for important things so I'm gonna be popping on here sometimes in the middle of the day at noon for those of you who you know sitting sitting at the house like myself and then sometimes at night just because with with the Blessed tribe we we got a good group as you can see only the blessed tribe can comment I always do that just because on YouTube they show everybody who's going live so it can be somebody that's just completely clueless as to who I am and what I'm doing and they can come on live and if it's open for the public they could start writing all kind of nonsense so my checks are only available for the blest tribe members to join the blest tribe you see the link in the description in the description box under the video so I'll be popping in just to take some questions from you know because different people make different lives and I made that promise to you when you join the blest tribe that I'd be making time to answer your questions so that's why you'll see me here sometimes it's random nicosia yeah I hope I'm saying your name right forgive me a file if I'm not need more information on the 72-hour rule ordered the book can't wait well you're gonna have to wait because the book coming up and you see on the back of say the 72-hour rules so if you have not pre-ordered or one was influenced pre-order that and so you're gonna have to wait on the book because if I tell you everything by seven two hour rule and no reason to get booked but or you might need to a one-on-one session and thank you to those you who have gone to my mentor dot life and book the session with me due to that my schedule is booked out through April I think now people starting to book inmate so all of marches is booked up and here here soon I may have to bump bump my rate up of $25.00 of something just to kind of slow down on the the influx let me see yeah redbone Afrikaner 21 you you called a live in real time let me see Britney so I decided to get back with my child's father he has multiple children with multiple women do you think those type of situations can work a long time he has 11 children my son is number 10 I mean just based on his track record just based on his resume alone it would say no but God is possible anything is possible if somebody wants to change that somebody wants to grow the thing is is you got to pay attention to see if growth is actually happening so if he's the same man that he's always been the same willy nilly go with the flow turning to the wind type man then no it absolutely has no chance of working and what you have to realize is soul ties are real so you got to think about this and understand that might be why y'all are you know coming back together and so you have to watch his day-to-day actions now if he has been dipped you know in the blood of the Lamb and he's changed his life and done a 180 and he just walking different talking different looking different smelling different dressing different then maybe change is possible but like they say a leopard doesn't change the spots you got to be very careful about that they're very careful levan yeah you got to make sure he don't have that CoV I 19 not he'll have you decided when you're going to speak more about financial prosperity topics well I don't talk about financial prosperity topics I will be speaking on purpose and entrepreneurship with purpose which can produce some financial prosperity but for me my angle is purpose on fact the onea fight iyanya Fattah forgiving night you know I messed your name last time but I so see and I bless thank you lord bless him so on Saturdays is my Small Business Saturday videos that I'll be uploading I've been writing down some hapax and once I get through the the basic topics like last week was how to find your purpose then I was gonna go in a little deeper on some intrinsic details with some questions that comes in from y'all how did y'all highlight names I wonder what that means Tony questions if we if we already started off with a man of wrong with a man gave him credit for things that he hadn't even done living in our own fantasy can we turn it around to see if he could be the one um now I don't fully know what that means cuz you know that could mean something different to you than it means to me now if you mean if you've gotten on your back and you've been on your back then all you can do is try to close your legs to see if he's gonna get up and move on with his life now if you mean just singing his praises and being nice maybe cooking a meal or you know paying for a date then you know that that's not to be you you can work around that but what you're gonna have to do is stop initiating contact stop giving him more than he's giving you okay no like gave more than he's giving ya stop giving more than he's giving you so what you have to do is you hear people use this term in different industries but I've always used it in relationships for mirror his actions and what I mean by that is if a man claims to be the head to be the lead and all this other stuff then he should be leading in love and then I so wondering what you do is you receive that and you reciprocate you may be receiving and reciprocating but you should not be setting the standard and the bar for love because the way men are will get complacent men will get complacent old Deborah Adam see I almost she-devil god bless you I really appreciate you do you and your wife offer in-person premarital session no I don't do nothing in person and now with this right here going around it's even further more reason why I don't do anything a person but for me I don't do anything a person just because although I'm accessible and I'm here a lot I'm still a public figure you know is what I mean by that is I have 3 million supporters online and I say that humbly but what happens with that is when you in certain areas people to see that as a target if I lived in Los Angeles no big deal if I lived in Atlanta New York probably no big deal but because of the way social media is today and everybody could be a social media you know celebrity and because I'm on television and I know all the day I just I don't do anything in person just because I never know where person mind is that you know how they see me you know versus if I was not online and just like a counselor or therapist you know in my office and I'm marketing through the classifieds or something like that mistre mail god bless you god bless you thank you Natasha thank you I see your question here let me see I told you I met a really great guy but he's extremely fat okay we could have said be it we could have said plus I blessed by the Lord heavyset don't know if I can deal with the physical attraction could I possibly miss my husband if I'm not allowing his character to be his currency I don't think that's like a concession that you have to make what you want to think about is you know y'all could work out together if he's a great person internally and you give it time y'all can work out together you know he may just need somebody to introduce I'll be honest with you coming from where I'm from we would never talk in school what soda and sugar does to your body like in class they've never said listen if you drink a lot of sweet tea and lemonade this is what it does when it goes in your body if you eat a lot of fried chicken this is what it does when it goes in your body honestly I never learned that and I realized I looked at my dad's side and everybody would die around 65 years old and when I looked at their eating habits and their lifestyle everybody was diabetic by like the age of 45 50 and when I looked at it I realized it just was a lack of knowledge so sometimes people in that situation just because they don't have the knowledge and they're just eating what tastes good to them they're eating what they used to to eat and what their parents ate they just eaten what comes from their culture but don't understand what it does to the body and so it's really soothing their their issues and you know how people eat like that emotionally so you might have to see if it's something like that now if he big and nasty and what I mean by that is nasty personality he want to snap sometimes he want to get hangry you know how they say hungry and he want to get hangry all the time now going back to business he got that he got the the nerve to catch an attitude going about your business but if he not where you wanted to be physically but he's a great person great character and it's consistent not it think so some could be worked out redbone Africana god bless you god bless I so appreciate you showing up and showing that and I don't know you asked for no charge back now I'm trying to draw it back on you or should you trust a married man who says he's not happy gets a divorce then wants a relationship with you but he tried to have a relationship with you before he filed no you can't trust him no I mean no you can't trust him you you can't trust him you know just point-blank period because he showed you who he is so he showed you that if you and him don't work out he gonna do you the same way and so you gotta take people that at face value you know I can't I can't come I can't let somebody come in my space who trying to sell me stolen merchandise and then trust them to be around my valuable items so that's essentially what you would be doing and what you got to realize is nothing special about you in his eyes now it's night now hit me what I'm saying you special in the sight of the Lord the Lord love you you God's child but in his eyes there's nothing special about you in his eyes you would be his rebound you will be his band-aid you will be his hold me down his hold me over that's what you will be so that's what you got to understand Hey rapmon Africana a god bless you god bless you he would be surprised what I see out here caramel kisses then drop my cash up and now a bless you caramel for doing that cuz some of y'all I mean some people sent my dollar a ladies on sent me a check to my business mailing address the other day said I'm gonna check and said bless you Tony that thing blessed me I probably almost shed a tear and for those of you who sent me a cash out for my birthday just to say thank you hey I'll be honest with you you know it get a little lonely out here on this here mission because you have so much attack you know it's hard for me to even have guy friends cuz my message Stefan everybody told my message step on my toes so I could be just putting out a message in somebody that I was just talking to last week might get in a feelings cuz they thinking I was talking to them and realized just was talking to the coach but which all showing that love and support I honest with you me more than you realize hey Tony so this man told me he didn't want a commitment been dating a few months he wants to he wants to be available he told you he didn't want a commitment been dating a few months he wants to be available so I cut him off no contact two days later saying he wants me he doesn't want anyone else hmm well I tell you this I mean what do you really what do you really want do you want to be with him you know it's like being on somebody job and they ain't paying you and you didn't put in all this work and then when you finally leave they say oh hey come on we'll put your own salary now but then what if you come back and they put your own salary and they stop paying you again in a month or two months and now you didn't turn down other job opportunities you know you got to look at it like that I don't think you should have to leave a man for him to then say I want you if he told you while you been there for a few months he don't want you you know that that doesn't sound that's a man won't do that and let me help y'all understand something real quick let me help y'all now holding your questions real quick oh your question let me help you understand something anything a man want in his life he's gonna go after you see Jeff Bezos a billionaire the Carlmont god bless you hold on hold your question I hope they don't disappear you see Bill Gates a billionaire you cjz Michael Jordan anything a man wanted his life he's gonna set his mind to it and he gonna go after he gonna do what he have to do even more so when it comes to a woman if you ever meet a man ever in your life meet a man who tells you he doesn't want to commitment that's not your husband if he tells you he doesn't want to be in a relationship that's not your husband if he tells you that he's not sure about you that's not your husband because a man will never see something or somebody that he wants and say he does that's like him walking up to a billion dollars and saying oh I'm not in the money I don't want no billion I don't want to be keep that billion you're not gonna do that that's like a man walking up to his favorite car oh no I ain't never wanted a rolls-royce roll right I want to roll right he's not he's never gonna do that so a man is never going to walk up to a woman that he sees could be his wife and say I don't want it I don't want a relationship when a man tell you that it's because he's not sure about you for why he don't like what he's looking at 'la Carmen Carmen got on air now god bless you for your blessing is it a red flag god says love you and two is yes it's a red flag that's a red flag that was my that was my thing what I used to do just meet you don't even know your middle name tell them I love you that that's and the reason why men do that is because men know that is so men and women that's desperate for love and even though he knows that you know he might be joking or lying he just know the fact that he said that it's gonna do some to you I used to do that all the time meet a woman in two weeks I love you I love getting off the phone I love you and then one like but that's how you get them you know that's that's a game you got the when a man serious about a woman and he sees that she is a real woman in his eyes meaning that a real potential wife he's not gonna throw he's not gonna throw out that I love you I didn't throw that out there with my wife because you know she gonna be able to tell that you full of it you throw that out there when you just playing around and you don't care if a woman gonna catch the red flag or not so when the guy said is that he got issues you got any tools you got to pull back now I'm looking for y'all question now if y'all put them them red signs I see you right here cool raps like a TV I see your question right here let me see if I my ex started dating two months after us breaking up but still contacts me we were together for two years now I don't know if it's a man or a woman asking me this question cuz I can't really see the picture on then I can't go I don't wanna come too close to the camera I want y'all looking at all my flaws in my face I tell you what if yet started dating two months after y'all broke up that's just that's typical to be honest with you that's typical and then still contact me what it means is that your ex has a soul time but it's not really into the new relationship and ain't really into you you gotta close the door it's the soul time that's really holding your eggs the ex don't want you cuz he or she let y'all break up but yeah it's got a soul time want you to be stuck thinking about him or her and but yet still trying to move on that's like trying to have your cake and eat it too as we always here set Tricia know daddy named Cedric is your daddy named Cedric he hits you with a name that's the blessed unique name duh said Tricia and I forgive if I'm saying it wrong so Toni will it be okay to date other races with two african-american boys and he has none me on citizen readers again will it be okay to date other races with two african-american boys and he has not okay okay date another race Debbie god bless you god bless in the middle other in the middle of what we got going on right here you showed up and showed lower polite polite will it be okay to date other races now I tell you what now what you're gonna have to get and that's what I want you to understand shaquita god bless you I feel like I feel like you didn't been in here before sending me a blessing the Lord must have pulled out in your life Lord part in our life again god bless you thank you for the knowledge hello to the Gaston family and the Blessed tribe be blessed god bless let me make sure now I tell you what when you dating outside your race what you got to realize is you got to take your time because you want to make sure that this is legit that is real now me being a relationship coaching me how also having experience with dating outside of my race for some people it's an experiment it's just like trying to 31 flavors that Baskin Robbins for some people it's an experiment for some people it's a bucket list item so what you got to realize when you are a black woman the blacker the berry the sweeter the juice men like variety men like to taste the rainbow like skittles so you another color in the skills pack and so you got to make sure that if you date outside your race that this man have experience with your race that he grew up around your race that he went to school with your race that he truly has an appreciation for your race understanding of your race because you'll end up being a test dummy you'll end up being barbershop talk meaning he touch you just a report back to his boys to say yeah man hey woo at me hey it's like you know I saw that uh Alexis oh honey and touch that Serena Williams and I said man I might have something there want me a piece of that black berry pie and man tell you what it was amazing so you have to be real careful whatever race he might be knighted that never was ain't no certain race okay it could be anything yellow pink of purple naima god bless you god bless you providing on life Lord thought must've pulled out and shaquita like because I feel like I'm seeing shaquita sent him send me blessing before not so understand that because to be honest with you that's why when I coach women outside of my race who were a part of the race that I dabbled into some years ago I tell them I say listen be very careful I say you're going about your business not I say going by sub is and I say because yours of that race and you hire me because I'm of this race and not you dealing with me and who of my race I'm gonna tell you the truth you're gonna have more headaches then you're gonna have laughter and joy because when me and eight outside a race it's a lot of times this is situations and issues and stuff that's going on it's a reason why because I see a lot of women now talking about dating outside a race because of frustration that ain't the right reason to date outside the ring oh I'm sick and tired buddy no good Nick rose he don't know how oh then got no mama you know what I'm finna get me a white man I'm finna get me a Hazen man and a lot of women that keep on putting in my comment Tony Tony Tony you need to tell these black and women that they need that date outside of their race and I'm like why would I tell somebody to do that like that's the wrong reason just to be going on here looking for somebody of the other race because you discussed it in Matt with your own light let that happen organically if you meet somebody of another race and it hit off it worked okay great but if you went out looking for somebody because of that reason you you going about it all wrong and it's gonna blow up in your face trust me when I tell you because guess what when they come to a man watch the movies why she'd move you seen the movie enough that's another movie I just watch men all races could be a mess men of all races and nationalities could be a hot mess TRUCKING when I tell you nothing Missy okay your meal god bless you carrot dad the main gas god bless you Tony what to do with name change divorce is final in April officials credentials expire in three years just pay for name change is there a tie and last name other than soul ties okay now I doubt name change will cost that much now the most I don't heard it cost is $500 maybe $50 in some places but yeah change your name because I'll tell you this if you want to move on with your life if you want to have another relationship don't know man want a woman who got a ex-husband last name and that's what a lot of women don't understand tell my I don't want to have to change my look my license and my driver's license I don't want have to change my insurance car my dissing that my man change that stuff that take one day that take one day gone do what you got to do take your day off work you got some time right now with this here going on and change your name so that you open and free so when your real husband come in he see that you completely broke all ties and completely healed and you ready for love Jay Renee god bless you god bless you for your blessing part in your life Laura got back with my ex-husband lasted three months mm-hmm mmm-hmm take a note and I hear buddy listening to take a note got back with my ex-husband lasted three months broke up with me for asking about text he receives from his ex-girlfriend's said he's not responding to them and nothing's going on and I should trust him mmm thank you for sharing that thanks for sharing that you did the right thing you did the right thing because especially in marriage especially in marriage because in marriage there is no privacy my wife could come in here and get my phone right now and say hold on I need to see your phone it is no privacy in marriage and ain't know all of that okay because you want so and it should not be any privacy in marriage because if something happened to somebody in marriage you need to be able to get today phone boom boom boom put it in the cold and be able to call whoever you need to call reach out to whoever you need to reach out to it might be somebody you need to call ask a question let them know something you want to plan a surprise birthday party you need to had a cold so you could go in and text all the day friends hey having a surprise party you know whatever get all the contact so you could take it from your phone that's why there's no privacy in marriage Wendy 44 god bless you thank you bless the Lord I love your unfiltered truth thank you for putting forth so much energy to help us in all areas 80 god bless you know what energy you know I put out the energy and y'all bless me so it keep me going if I was just pouring into just emptiness but you see how you just bless me with that with that blessing right yeah let's say some to me you know it's it's it's reciprocation and say that you appreciate what I'm doing so that's why I've been showing up on YouTube too because I got a group here that appreciate the work where it's on Instagram you don't know what people doing you don't know how to feel about you question how to deal with a man and their toxic ways don't deal with them don't deal with I I don't deal with toxicity and I don't recommend dealing with it so if a person gonna be in your life they're gonna have to clean all that up because talks is a kill you so you can't deal with something that's gonna be all draining and breaking you down wearing you down the answer to that is don't deal with it boyfriend incarcerated and broke up after getting new knowledge thanks by the way still cause because we have a daughter and says he's changed and doesn't want to lose me together four years seems to be maturing jail 14 months I mean coming from where I'm coming from I be honest which I hate to say it I don't I don't trust nothing to man safe behind bars a man got to be in this free world for me to listen to him everything a man said to me from behind bras I got taken with a grain of salt because you just that's a whole nother element in there when you in there and all you got is time to think and write and send a letter every day and and all of that I can't I got too many people locked down I just I don't even talk to me when you get out here and ina had too many family members date and men who locked down and they believed in one thing they doing all this they got all this hell going on and the woman in love she wasting all that gas money on scene when wasting all this gas money going to the visitation every week wasting all this money on new outfits to go to the jailhouse and then the man get up and treat him like Casper the ghost treat him like he know she exists and so because of that right there I don't believe nothing a man got to say behind him boss let him get out here in this free world dance see what he does with the energy I hid in his free world question I asked my guy to call me tonight because for some reason I want to hear him say it's over and that he wants to move on date at 10 months and after no and he shifted never broke up with me directly advice you got to give yourself closure okay you got to give yourself closer you a man on average a man will never give you closure because closure means you know like you know them certain doors that when you walk out of like the airport and you walk out that door that door that you push open and it closed behind you so you can't enter back in there you got to go in the right way another way to go back through the security check that's what a man giving you closure looks like a man don't give you closure because he want to be able to distance himself shift his energy get a little distance get you to get the picture you get a little distance but then when his situation that he's pursuing doesn't work out he could just come back he could just pop back in your life and it's really because he knows that if he gives you closure you could close the door and lock it change the locks hey I'll see y'all talking about my shirt caveats and nuances now y'all know I be hanging out with the vocabulary words on him so he had caveats and nuances that the shirt is up under my videos so you watch my video up under you'll see a couple of shirts I got through on teespring some of y'all already got this shirt and I made it as cheap as I could possibly make it was like $14.99 because you know teach Brian take all the money so I just made it dirt cheap love you I'm a oh he came to blew me a kiss I don't know how to blow a kid and I mean with the blowing the kids see you do some stuff for you for your son that you won't do I won't blow kisses nada been working out for a month with a guy I'm interested in I asked what type of student was he and he said he had anger issues he's 34 now with no background is this a red flag no I never nobody asked what kind of student it was but the fact that he told you that to be honest with you he didn't have to tell you that he could have left that with the Lord so me personally sometimes I believe people tell you stuff about themselves just so that you know where they are and where they operate from so it's kind of like a little like hey hey I got any issue so make me man and I'm like a donkey me personally I don't deal with those kind of people I don't deal with those kind of people because I'm the same way I let people I'm doing business with in a real way I let them know like listen with me ain't no boring the court we do something different with people who mess with your money and I just look at them just like that right there just let them know like listen I Lord a lot Lord but you mess with more money you're gonna beat them for I do and so when a man tell you he's down ain't issue they're saying okay okay okay just take your time with him just take your time with him and you got to watch them in the key that's why I tell y'all the date for at least that's why I had a date for at least 12 months I tell y'all the date for at least 12 months so that you could see the ups and downs you could see a person in all their different elements Jayla god bless you bless you bless you y'all doing good in the middle of a situation we in-laws showing out in y'all like Lord so often so I started over with ex who wanted to continue being with me I'm taking steps of allowing him to court me and date me over the right way is that a good chance a relationship could work well I'll tell you what you need to do y'all gonna have to get new knowledge because now he knows what to do but you're gonna have to get new knowledge so that's what I recommend get you some books finding some good relationship books make it work is one of my books the five love languages dr. Gary Chapman just a couple books you can start small and you read a chapter a week and then y'all discuss it make sure he's getting new knowledge so that he's becoming a new person and not just playing a role like yes-man know some of what to do but he really you need to know that he really has changed that he really is growing I had to get new knowledge to become the man that I am so I stopped listening to trash music and I would listen to podcasts and audiobooks for eight to ten hours a day literally eight to ten hours a day and that's what helped me renew my mind and my spirit wise woman ten god bless you I almost miss you but I but I caught you thank you bless you for that blessing they made sure not God JLo now I see somebody else pop in here so long god bless you hala Mariam happy Miriam that's a blessed name no not that name sound like it bless how do you know that a marriage is over have three kids when should I go to the courthouse and file when the person you're with is not making forward progress when the person you're with is not trying to grow they're not trying to do couples therapy couples coaching he's not trying to do personal coaching he's not open to reading books he's not open to sitting down and having heart-to-heart conversations real conversations then that's when you know that it's at the end of the road that's when you know and so you have to understand that somebody just said Shana just said you asking is spilling out of you and that that really is is your answer to you know when you have to ask is your marriage over nine nine ten times it is but it's okay for you to give one last-ditch effort and what I mean by that is it's for you to become loved and for you to operate with love you know it's a movie can't remember the name of it maybe it's called fireproof it's a solo low-budget Christian movie and they have in there like the The Love Dare or something it's like 40 days of love and I've done that before with my wife and it's where you just love and you love and love and love and then you're not complaining but you showing low and to see if your partner if you can heal his heart and wash him with law and Kadisha husband who you made a vow to now you don't do this with no boyfriend you don't do this with a boyfriend but for marriage is worth it and it's just a sacrificial love to where you cooking his favorite meals you speaking life to him you're writing a little love notes you're not blaming him you're not arguing you're not complaining and you give it 40 days and if the Lord called you xx the Lord called you 240 Lord called you 260 and and then once you come through there if that don't start to change him they don't start to renew his heart with with a real love and he sees you for who you are then that's when you know you've done what you can do sunshine a goddess god bless you sunshine God has got an old name on the night what does it mean if your partner doesn't compliment you exactly tells you you're beautiful sliced sexually says example ok tells you you're beautiful / sexy if you can't express yourself in a relationship okay so y'all Elaine went there yet um II thought that doesn't mean anything that doesn't mean anything because y'all ain't even went there yet and you saying if you can't express yourself in relationship you can spread yourself with your mouth now you don't have to get on your back they express yourself you can spread stuff with your mouth you could write to the lovin you know Hallmark card in business night so cleaner way to express yourself without getting on your back okay and to be honest with you that's if he wants to get you on your back he need to beast calling you're beautiful and and all of that now I tell you like this right here it's two reason why man don't give a one man compliment one is because he don't feel that way about you and two is because he don't he doesn't want to put you on a pedestal so that you looking down on him so that's that's really the two main reasons so understand that right there are first and foremost now and at the same time don't worry about compliments you know you gotta know who you are you got no you beautiful don't live for somebody else compliment huh my wife don't always compliment me she give him a compliment on but not all the time not every day even every other day but I Know Who I am you know I know what I bring to the table so that's where your self-love kicks in don't don't wait on validation and approval of somebody else cuz you're always being at spacing and nobody can ever make you feel worthy and fully approved meta-god talk for hours and FaceTime and getting to know each other met in person but got into an argument over something stupid should let it go or continue with riff like that's a red flag that's red flag took on a bottled up get on a bottle that's a red flag now that's that's one of my biggest situations what I used to always do with everyone when I'm in I take on a two-hour drive well I will to my hometown an hour back to see her spirit to see her temperament to see what type of emotional intelligence she has and I'd be honest with you it was a young lady that I met right before my wife who she loved debate she loved debate about everything she had the spirit of beg to differ as I called it and she always want to be the different and we didn't even know each other the first time really being spending some time together she wanted to bait by everything I said and I'm like dude it's gonna be a head ache because he when you are when you have some wisdom and you have some maturity you understand that you don't have to address every little nuance that you don't agree with you don't have to address everything because it's not a kingdom issue so if a person feels a certain way you could see their viewpoint and say okay all right at D I like that okay yeah I never heard it like that but hey thank you for sharing it and and you could keep it moving but when when when somebody want to argue all that what we called him home but called art so I might want to our call the time knew but when I met my wife we talked six hours it was not one debate dispute argument disagreement I'm pretty sure it was things we saw differently but it wasn't a kingdom issue so she didn't bring it up I didn't bring it up because we had that level of maturity so I said okay this right here this woman I could marry and even to this day thirteen years this might make 13 years of marriage I married it when I was 23 and 23 and 22 days old and still to this day we don't argue you know we sees things differently you know a lot of stuff but it just ain't any worth it it's not an argument and so what I saw in the beginning turned out to be right Tony how do you handle conflict resolution I always hear you shouldn't go to bed angry you handle it by addressing the issue you know bringing it up addressing the issue and admitting that you're wrong putting the shoe on the other foot seeking to understand then be understood and you address it you bring it up in a time of peace now you don't you don't hand her you don't handle it conflict resolution in the middle of an argument where things yelling and screaming stuff getting ready to start flying that ain't when you address it you you do your cooldown technique you take you cool down you you gather yourself you get you little space about you get your mind and then you bring it up and you understand and partner understand that this got to be talked about and we got to come to terms on this and if it's truly love y'all can see the situation from each other's viewpoint both of you will take and put the shoe on the other foot so I make a habit of it you know my wife and I we have a disagreement we talk about it it's been times in our marriage that we didn't talk to two or three o'clock in the morning and where we get sick on the stomach cuz we're gonna stayed up so late but we don't believe in going to bed man and it's a lot of time majority of the time it's me having to apologize and then some of the time is heard having to apologize you know just about whatever and on you know one time example we was at a baseball game and I went to say something to my wife and she was telling me something my son missed the ground ball and I was like got to teach him that and I just said you know got to teach him that what I meant was we got to teach him that or I kind of meant yeah you got to teach him that I ain't say you got to teach him that but she worked with him a lot and in his catching it stuff and she's like you teach him that and she just was like joking like but she said it loud and women the woman over here look one over there look and it made it look like the tone was like if you was reading into it it's like you were sorry daddy you need to teach them how to catch the ball and that thing right there I want to play by that I don't play by disrespect I don't play by nothing in public don't don't show you behind in public you got to realize somebody always watching so I had to talk to about that same thing happen with me and her one time where I gave her suggestion in front of everybody ain't kind of embarrassed and so she had talked to me about that so sometimes both of us will make mistake and we had to talk about it hash it out she say you know what I apologize that if that made you feel like I disrespected you it was just in the moment I am anything but you're not just saying like just talking and we'll work through it so even the small situations that could become a deal-breaker in your mind you gotta address it treasure god bless you God bought that I never text him first should I start it Stella god bless you thank you for your blessing what you got um realized I call this a three to one ratio I talk about 3:1 ratio a lot where I'm saying not to be exact but what I'm saying is there has to be some reciprocation so if he texts you first Monday Tuesday Wednesday you could text him first on Thursday now you don't have to make it an exact science but yes you do have to reciprocate some for a man so that he knows that you're interested in him to a Deborah Kerr god bless you again they still got your blessing up there so they really saying 8:00 time make sure you see help let's not make so god bless you Debbie so yes reciprocate but it shouldn't be one to one it can be it's not the end of the world if it is because a man is wired to pursue a man is wired that's why women make such a big deal about the good morning beautiful you know and the hello beautiful text messages all the time fashion forward I see I see your question god bless you I've watched your video can men and women be friends do you think that my male friend could be the one isn't friendship important to the foundation of a relationship that's a great question and yes it's in yes it is important to the foundation of relationship but you got to realize something now because it's caveats and nuances to that situation because what you have to understand is when y'all come in as just friends you compartmentalize so you put you see him as a friend he sees you as a friend so y'all are platonic friends it's hard to go from a platonic friendship to a romantic relationship it's different when you and you see each other as a potential love interest but you build a friendship as the foundation to your love interests hopefully that makes sense to you that's totally different so friendship is a firm foundation for a relationship but when you come in the intention should be to be a couple and then you build friendship getting to know each other what's your favorite color what's your favorite food where you grew up tell me about your parents all of this but when you come in and and we you know we besties and we bro and sis and then you try to go from bro and sis to husband and wife that's when things get a little tricky and and that's what that's those right there I never see the old workout from platonic friendship to romantic relationship I never see those work I'm sure there are some but it's not enough for me to you know condone it or recommend it cuz I do this every day and been doing it every day for like 12 13 years so I just have never heard a situation on any coaching call in the email that say we were best friends as platonic friends and now we are happily in love and been married 10 20 30 years I always hear the opposite we were best friends platonic friendship decided to give it a try because we both saw each other go through bad relationships we gave it a try and now we literally at each other's throat and we hate each other we need coaching that's what always come my way do men always know right away if you're the one or do they realize it later do men think you're the one then change their mind it's yes and no to both of those questions so you got to realize not every man is marriage-minded so a marriage minded man who is looking for his wife actively can know you're the one from early on like the first real real real conversation he can have an idea he can say to himself if she is who she just showed me she was I can marry this woman now yes a man can't think you're the one and then change his mind because you know I remember Dayton and I had a girlfriend in the past that didn't take a makeup off and it's like not hold on now okay you want to take that makeup all if we trying to go long-term but the whole time that I dated her never seen it without a makeup and so I'm like now if you mess around and go from Janet Jackson to Freddy Jackson I'm gonna be real upset and so I'm gonna leave you see what I did makeup and it just never happened so of course I said oh good a good person good heart but I don't know what I'm looking at I don't know who I got here you know if this Freddy or Janet and so I'm gonna need little more than that the other thing is a man can't change his mind once you get comfortable and if you get comfortable and start showing your true colors Lee god bless you before he falls in love he could change his mind and I see when a man falls in love he gives you more grace giving more room but if he hasn't fallen in love and then next thing you know you picking boogers in public you burp and passing gas you know you leaving your monthly floating in the toilet stool you didn't wrap it all the way up in Titian you got a tote on the top of the trash can and it's six months and eight months in and he like whoa that woman out the barn house I thought I had some classy just warming out the barn house I'm like to get on up out of here so yes a man definitely can thank you to one and then change it's mine so that's why you got to know who you are and be who you are I'm gonna tell you 13 years of marriage my wife ain't never publicly passed around me that just her personal that's just her personal thing I never said you can't pass no gas around me but she just said the type she believed that's inappropriate disrespectful what have you so in 13 years of marriage she never publicly on purpose pass no gas around me so and I thank God for I'm not I'm not begging for her to be passing okay I wanna be smelling Oh God if that's not in her you know DNA so lord thank you lord thank you not if she set me up like that again I I don't know where I would have had a lot of issues you know it would affect me certified life coach on my mentor doc life the next three ladies to book a session session on the site I will refund the cost back to you look it up Joanne Joanne came in with a marketing coming he'll mark it in now y'all go book Joanne three late at night night don't don't ask for a refund if you later number four if you lady number fo you letting them find soul it don't butcher way unless you willing to pay for it cuz you probably gonna be in their first three now less you on my mentor like that like right now but Joanne glad to see you than the jump knowing out there and Joanne got certified in my program and now she on my mentor dot life book session with her hopefully she had twenty five hours our Joey start out at twenty five nine go beyond that 250 Whitman shine savage god bless you god bless he got the last name that show government name God Canadian $13.99 bless your system I have two children and want to know when is the best time to introduce a new relationship to the mix they are grown adults boys it's been years since I have dated how long okay okay you don't have two children you got two adult Suns that's totally different that's totally different that's all really different you could tell them on the first day you tell them about every first date you give them his name his driving license tag number you tell them by every day they stay wrong so they're not gonna be on an emotional roller coaster with you they're gonna and in fact because they've grown they could you know put that there on and so they may want to know who you're going out with mama who you're talking to so it's perfect timing and being that they are adults is perfect timing to introduce a relationship and as long as you not on your back stay off your bike keep your legs closed and you'll be all right is it possible to trust a man again once he has broken your trust or should I just move on it's possible it's possible to trust again but it's a choice see Trust is a choice because it's people who have not broken trust and people don't trust don't trust them so Trust is based on your experiences and your life and what you've seen over time and Trust is a choice but understand this if you don't have trust you don't have a relationship so you have to be able to trust it is possible it is possible you know I broke my wife trust and early on in our dating years I mean we take that long but she saw a Facebook message and you know that we flirt what have you and you lose trust but then she made a decision I'm gonna give him a chance I'm gonna give him a chance I'm gonna trust him and I turned into the man that I am today but you have to see that he's working and he's doing he's doing right I'm working on the three B's well I should say on the two beats brain and brain Brandon brain I'm having health issues right now can't really work on the body the way I want to do you have to do all three beatings at the same time no and then you know not do all three B you can't do all three at the same time in a way you want to do one at a time can't if you focus on everything then you focusing on nothing so like Bruce Lee say if you emphasize everything you emphasize nothing think that what Bruce Lee said I'm converged and Bruce Mouw but you you focus on one at a time that way you really can do it and the body don't mean just working out you know you're going through health issues that means just eating right I mean eating right that means sleeping right that's the body to the body don't don't make the body just superficial about working out and losing weight or gaining weight or what-have-you hold on much to lovely I see your question but J Rossington Putney Hill hello mr. Gaston's I'm the college guy you helped a stream back dropping in to say thank you maybe you meant a while back dropping in Oh a stream back maybe you met a live stream back to say thank you I hope all is well with you and your family a god bless you thank you for popping in and showing that law and part in the blessing like that I really appreciate that Veronica you know god bless you if I miss some of y'all who put the stickers in there y'all gotta forgive me because the sticker go in the chat and chat going craziness another one that it goes up at the top so I almost miss you Lee but I see you're here I'm I'm pregnant my boyfriend has cheated four times should I stay god Bless You Lee god bless you I think you might be new to me I think you might be new to me you new to me god bless you you should have been gone yesterday give me absolutely not absolutely not I'm telling you what get you the best child support lawyer you hear me and you finna get on that child and put them on that child support Lobby them don't go to the crown don't go don't brain quick No hit them hard as you can sport you hit me cuz you wanna do you like that and you care to see new you got to go cuz you're gonna be better all by yourself with a man like that that man try you crazy and you have them paying that monthly that way if he don't pay license suspended don't pay jailhouse you wanna be irresponsible he's gonna be a grown boy out here I hear sleeping around messing around cheating around don't want to own up to what you got going on no siree Bob Debbie I'm dating this guy but notice he had a very small package other than that he is great I'm also keeping my legs closed do you think this would be a major issue long time say marriage okay now I'm wondering how you notice he had a look Johnson and you keep your last clothes now because it's you to open some milk nice however you find out ain't gonna judge you I'm not gonna judge you but I was watching on the I was watching on the on the plane doctor roof and she said that that does not matter that's what she said now I'm not a woman I can't tell you but she said that that don't matter because of where stuff situated you really only need about an inch inch and a half that's what she said okay so but I can't tell you because I'm not a woman so it's really up to you and and you know somebody say or gray sweatpants you know things fans grow in the heat of the moment okay so what you might see on a sweat pant might be a whole nother story you know cuz the way a man body built on the heat of the moment Tanya god bless you so yeah that's a personal choice I to be honest with you you're gonna have to ask a woman who's had to deal with Little Jimmy and look Johnny look Johnson and they'll let you know but not know nothing about that never been on the receiving in god bless you something I've got to ask when the ladies you to let me get old murder Oh murder god bless you is it mentally healthy to stay celibate longer than two years and not want to interact with men on a personal level now yes it's it is mentally healthy because that Act does not increase your mental health now they're gonna get out they got all these science and all of this they say to help you with migraines and it helped you with stress and it helped you with all of that but uh but that ain't why I was created it will create and reproduce so understand is you can do a whole lot with a man that gonna release the same chemicals from your brain it just dopamine and serotonin so you can go on an amazing date like to be honest with you like a lot of men will rather football players may get the same football players may get the same release from their brain from a touchdown as they do from being in the bed you know basketball players hitting a shot or game-winning shot you know entrepreneurs earning a certain amount of money may get the same feeling so you could go on a good date you could have a great conversation get you a massage you know all the different stuff and Ida met women at my seminars that been eight years and they looked like they're going fine to me it looked like they're doing fine to me I don't see anything wrong with him on the outset and I don't know him on the inside in the mind behind closed doors but if the Lord say save yourself for marriage I don't see why to be wrong if men accused you of cheating does that mean he's cheating not necessarily but it could be but not necessarily it's not it's not 100 percent now what you could do is look a little closer to see if you could find anything but a look here we we own this he'll lock down my wife and cook me some old spaghetti I got to get going it's late I'm trying to get me some Netflix and chill in so we've been watching movies on this here and I really really appreciate y'all for your support I'm a pop in tomorrow night as well and try to do a Q&A but remember ye been watching us some Netflix and having on some look cheeseboard and you know and she made me some spaghetti tonight and she get that Cuban bread and she get that Cuban bread and she take him cut it cut it up and make our own little garlic the goal now that thing help me where I need to be so I made um pop it in tomorrow and try to do another Q&A cuz I miss some of y'all can't get everybody but God bless you and for the aspiring life coaches we still in the land on April 11th Lord willing with a small group is gonna be less than 25 so I'm not gonna let it go beyond that so we're gonna hand sanitizers in there and the Beyonc which I probably helped me smile of oil and therefore you will not be shaking your hand kane kane hook in take no pictures either but you're gonna become a certified life coach and that's almost website owner guys calm for slash events or you could take it online if something happened with the whole situation and they have to postpone it than i do it or i teach it online and in the meantime if you're not looking to become a coach but you want a coach then go to my mentor that life it's this coaches on there doing amazing work doing amazing job and I've been getting great feedback from the clients from the coaches so go to my mentor that life god bless you we'll talk soon

Channel: Tony Gaskins

Views: 24,890

Rating: 4.9504733 out of 5

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Id: nhEG0Haseuc

Length: 68min 49sec (4129 seconds)

Published: Mon Mar 16 2020