Your Healing! | Independent Woman University | Tony Gaskins

hey hey tony gaskins here hey you know i keep getting the question from women saying tony you know how do you invest in yourself and what about it if you're an independent woman so i'm gonna do independent woman university it's not like uh masterpienam college idc this we're gonna call this iwu independent woman university and i'm doing this from a male perspective because when you are independent woman you cannot see yourself and most independent women eventually want to attract a man attract the love of their life but you can't see yourself so a man as a man i can see you and i can see the kinks in your arm i can see the holes in your defense the same way a woman can see the holes in a man's defense and what a man the kinks in a man's armor and so that's why this perspective is different because it's coming from the outside looking in which is typically 20 20 vision we always could see somebody else problem and can't really see our own so just for those of you who who want this you know perspective from a healthy person who's living a honest lifestyle and not you know just any old body speaking into your life so now understand this now if you've taken some of my courses on tonygaskinsacademy.com then you've already done a lot of this work but being that i talk from the top of the dome it's always going to be a little different when i teach it different times on different you know avenues so understand that now see the first thing that you have to do when you enroll in independent woman university and you you in this space of your life to where you are an adult meaning you're 18 over and you are living your life you're not desperate for a man you're not chasing a man but you're open to love if love finds you if the man finds you you open to it in that space right there the first thing that you need to do is to heal you have to heal and you cannot rush that process and i see i get to see it myself being on youtube making videos and having a comment section you have to heal and a lot of times now people i'll see people make comments and they'll say oh man this video been up five minutes it's hour long video and it already got a dislike what i've been doing i've been disabling that just just cause i'm petty at time petty and just so the hater when hey to go to hit that dislike and they go to see oh yeah let me see if my one dislike can't see it how you feel about that it just took me one little click i just had to do one little click on on the background of youtube but how you feel about that now see what i'm doing and i'm forcing the hater to grow up forcing the haters to grow up to get their life and so really i'm helping them and that's ministry so understand that right there but i see people say that and a lot of times now like i see some men but not really like a man with like it's his face it's a man name and it's a comment i really don't see that i've seen that a handful of times like five times where soul hating man where you could see his face his name and he in the comments because 95 of the people who watch these videos are women so what i get to see is women and a lot of times women probably don't even realize that their comment shows me as a person who coaches individuals every day it shows me that she is broken that she is hurting and that she is coming online to spew her hate for men and her pain from men to someone who is online trying to help men and women be better people so we can have better relationships and she comes and she takes out her pain from her father from her ex-boyfriend her ex-husband on me and i ain't did nothing to her ain't never seen her never touched never heard her and she in oh well see this is what i'm tired of i'm so sick and tired of all of these relationship videos telling women what to do you need to have bill for men telling me what to do and i'm like okay so you tired of the videos but you seen the video and click the video to come and watch the video then get in the comment to say what you tired of okay don't nobody care ain't nobody going no well this video gonna be here every day you see what i'm saying so now you just wasted precious time from god god looking at you like you could have been on the treadmill you would have been in a college classroom you could have been that job and on your job working trying to get a promotion but you in the comments expressing your displeasure when the people who dare to grow do not care about what you tired of seeing you see what i'm saying so that's why healing is important and then you will have women who will go on dates and i know y'all gonna say well what about an independent man university okay worry about yourself all right because get was for you and somebody else doing independent man university and he going now here at mount speednum college idc so that's what they're working on enough so worry about yourself because i just heard that spirit dropped it in my spirit listen to him this is why healing is important because what happens is you walk around and you taking your pain out on everybody else and you go into a situation and the the man you're dealing with you've already given him two strikes and he barely stepped to the plate to take a swing he really took no real swing yet and you gave him to strike two strike strike two three strikes you out the man like i ain't even all ain't took a swing yet like what's going on with you like what hold on so what's going on and and you i'm just sick and tired y'all remember on the um y'all remember i told you the story about the lady if in case you knew here you ain't seen it while i was passing out my book i'm passing up flyers from a book and i went and handled it the flyer it actually was a business card i went and handled the business card from a book listen i do not have the time you need to let me know what you want because i'm tired of the games so do you want me or not i will live man excuse me man i'm just promoting my book ma'am i'm married i'm married i'm just promoting my book this is a business card with my book title cover and information oh oh excuse me oh excuse me i'm just oh excuse me excuse me i'm just so tired of me playing games today and i'm just like okay so what is this oh all right this was interesting oh you know my sister has a salon you know how much is how much is the book oh okay 15 all right well i'll tell you what i like to get 10 of them because my sister has a hair salon i was like oh okay all right well thank you well let me know you know here's my number you know give me a call let me know what i need to do so i had to meet up give it a 10 bucks get my 150 dollar so she could put the 10 bucks in the salon but now my this one man this was this was 13 years ago now so hopefully she ain't following me i'm talking about her but this is a teaching moment this woman had her daughter there her daughter probably looked at eight or nine nine or ten so imagine what the daughter like the daughter so confused that the dog like what's going on what's going on mama this this nice man i was dressed nice had a low hair cut i ain't have my gold teeth in i used to have six gold teeth i think i just had two of my gold teeth on the bottom but i didn't have my top four in i ain't having my dress i ain't had my braids i used to have all that i had a low-cut dress night the daughter probably like well mama if you were coming to be a step daddy you just ruined that because you just showed dr jekyll and mr hyde you see what i'm saying so you have to think about this and this is what i start to see i'm starting i start to see so much of independent women be turned over to a reprobate mind and then be in the comments you know making excuses for it which listen none of us men women boys girl dogs none of us get excuses in life we got to look at our situation and we got to make changes point blank period we got to assess the situation find out what we need to do and then we got to make changes somebody said um well what tony have to understand is that women go through a whole lot with these men and listen that ain't going no well that ain't going no well so so you saying oh because i go through a whole lot they give me a right to be crazy they give me a right to be dr jekyll mr hyde they give me a right to be you know bipolar on purpose now not just born that way to where it's mentally it's in dna but you just choose you know what i'm going to be bipolar because i'm tired man so i'm going to be nice and then i'm going to go off and snap and then i'm going to be back nice again and that's just going to keep him so confused he's going to be so lost or confused and it's women that's choosing to do that choosing to do that now and that's what we're talking about so you got to ask yourself have i healed really be honest with yourself and ask yourself have i healed have i done the work to heal now what's the last book you read now this for you this ain't this ain't from a comment session just for you what's the last book that you read and when i say red i mean red with your eyes or listen to with your ears because you got audiobook what's the last book you read okay all right you read you can't recall oh all right see you see what i'm saying that's why you're not healed now if you said the last book you read okay did you understand it what's what's what do you recall from it what's the number one thing you learned from that book okay so right now you ought to be able to get a notebook open that notebook and see the things you learned from that book that you just read and now some women can do that some women have sent me uh videos or screenshots of their notebook with a page full of notes from one of my books and they put it in their story that's how you heal because you reading the knowledge of hearing the knowledge but then you writing it down even with these videos if you listen to why you driving or you listen to that work you need to listen to it again at home on your off day with your notebook so that when you get in this notebook you ought to have so many notes so if you have a daughter or if you have a granddaughter or a son or a grandson you ought to be able to when that notebook full you ought to be able to make copies and get that notebook out to your family get that notebook out to your loved ones because and we don't do this enough in family some families do it now some families got a manifesto or credo or whatever you want to call it they get passed down generation generation some grandfathers write a book for their grandson my grandchildren gonna have all my books if i if i ain't writing these books for nobody else is for my lineage to see how to live life how to make your relationship work how to be a dream chaser that's why i wrote the book the dream chaser i ain't just writing a book from y'all i'm writing a book for my son it's gonna they might not want to sit and listen to me talk right now but one day they gonna get in that book one day when the lord called me home my son's gonna read all my books cover the cover to get to know their daddy better you see what i'm saying so you ought to be while you if you so-called healing now and this little thing is it's a lot of women coming to me and the reason why i speak to the women because it's women who coming to me nah cause i ain't talking to the women because the women talking to me okay so hush so now what you have to realize is when you say you so-called healing what are you doing because you just looking at me but you ain't writing none down you ain't hitting the pause button you ain't writing down then you're not healing it's just like when you studying i don't i don't know how to study but i watch my wife teach my son how to study and he had to read it then he had to write it down then he had to write it three different times so he got to read it say it out loud write it down it's something it's like a three-step process she give him on his studying so it's etched in his mind then you got to put it on flash card then he got to study the flash cards front and back it's something like it uh he'll teach y'all about that but that's why he got straight a's no a minuses for you know and he and eighth grade trying to do the same thing right now he got straight a's i don't know if he got an a minus but it's because of the way my wife taught him to study so he actually learns what he learns what they teach and he remembers it don't just regurgitate on the test so when you heal in your heart that's what you have to do it has to re you have to renew your heart you have to renew your mind you can't just listen to a message just to feel good just to block your thoughts for an hour just to you know get away from what you're thinking about no you can't do that see what you have to do is you got to actually get it in your spirit you got to get the lesson and then you got to keep doing the work don't just do it one time do it twice do it three times you got to do the work and what's going to happen is now see what happens in this healing process is it's kind of like you know like if you picture your brain you know like a like a bowl i ain't got me no bowl right now and then you picture a bunch of little pieces of paper in that bowl you know just dumped in that bowl and each little piece of paper it says something one of them say you ugly another one say you better be lucky i'm even with you another one say you bad built another one say you ain't good enough another one say you too dark another one say you two light another one say you're oreo nothing will say you look like 1201 am and so you got all of these different things that's in your mind see when you start reading books and you start watching courses taking courses and you taking these free courses online okay this ain't idc this iwu when you take these free courses on iwu and you go to class two three times guess what you hear you are worthy you do deserve love you will attract a better man when you become a better woman you will not settle for a grown boy you will get married and be happy because it's so many other people thinking that marriage is not for everyone that they're canceling themselves out and they're making more room for you people coming to tone do you really believe there's somebody for everyone yes there's somebody for everyone who wants someone and everybody wants someone because they have your mindset believing that there's not someone for everyone so the fact that you believe that that's why there is nobody for you because you attract what you believe you attract what you are and people always get that confused when i say you attract what you are it does not mean who approach you it mean who you accept in your life who you settle down with that is a direct reflection of you a slug is not going to choose to settle down with a bottle of salt you see what i'm saying so you attract what you are you settle for what you are so if you settle with adult boy you is a trap queen if you settle down with a man and he becomes abusive and you don't leave then you are a punching bag if you settle with a cheater and you don't leave then you are a concubine you see what i'm saying that is a reflection of you so when you get new input and you learn that you worthy you learned that yes a man could be faithful they say um leopard don't change his spots we not animals we human so we can change and grow and evolve let's say does a cheetah chain listen i was a cheater you hear me i was a cheater in my relationship before my wife 26 other women oh yeah i'm giving you the real truth so but you don't if you don't believe that a man can change then your man not gonna change a man not gonna change because you don't believe that so you bringing unchangeable energy into the relationship you bring it you so sorry oh nasty dirty disgusts me i'm with you for one reason and one reason only and that's cause i want a daughter oh you bring that energy into the relationship no he's not going to change he's going to be dirt digging for the rest of your life but when you bring healthy and whole energy into a relationship there's a space in a room for him to change because he want to change because he sees you are pure see when my wife came into the relationship she didn't come into the relationship and give me two strikes she had just got cheated on by her ex-boyfriend but she didn't take that out on me she didn't hold that against me her energy was sizing me up looking at me like i'm stinking nasty she looked at me like i was a dream she used to stare at me like she was having a daydream and i used to look at her and wonder like why is this woman looking at me so hard it was like she was trying to get process every molecule of my body so that when i'm not with her she could picture me she used to look me in my eyes that hard and i used to wonder why do she stare so hard and but that just how she takes stuff in but her energy was pure her energy was whole i could feel her heart so guess what i didn't want to hurt her heart and if i made a mistake i didn't want to throw it in her face rub it in her face see a lot of men will cheat on you and then let you find out they cheated a lot of men will talk to their ex and then let you find out they talk to their ex see i did not want to hurt my girlfriend at which was who was my wife now i didn't want to hurt her i wanted to be perfect i wanted to describe and coming from being a dog it was absolutely hard to not have wandering eyes to not be emotionally cheating or not get caught up in nothing and so it was hard i had to focus but see that's what i wanted because of the energy she brought to the relationship if she came to the relationship and she was nasty and she was cold it would have sent me into competition mode it would have sent me oh okay all right [Music] okay so you think you're a city girl huh thank you thanks be spanish french jamaican vanilla all right i got something for you i'm finna show you whoo all right watch what happened and so a man will go into that zone because you come in so yeah so what exactly do you want with me because one thing i know is i can see right through ground boy because i'm tell you what you didn't know this exists but rome boy university is a thing and i have seen it so go ahead talk [Music] that worked on that that worked on the last one that what you just said that worked on the last one that you love the spirit of god and that the spirit of god is all in and through you and that you understand the essence of god she believed that [Music] go go ahead go ahead i'm not making fun of you i'm not making fun of you i'm just listening to you i'm just listening to you go ahead go ahead and so that right there what i just showed you that is real women it's that's real women that's real women i'm telling you now i'm a coach a life coach relationship coach some of the stuff i hear women say on on couples coaching sessions i'm like ma'am ma'am mal how did you expect this man not to cheat when you talking that man like that you told that man you talking that man like worse than cinderella get used to talk to used to get talked to what they talking man like snow white like where where he gonna be and i'm sitting on the phone like oh lord this man got so many women this man finna be oh my goodness the stuff he finna be doing with these jump offs oh my goodness i'm just seeing in my head what he doing with these other women because of the energy that this woman bringing to him and it's it see it's kind of like this you're a nice person but if i test you what's if i test you if if i come up and you send in your car at the grocery stage at the grocery store and i look all at you and i'm finna get out my car and i slain that doe and that don't hit your car hold on not christian hold on chris chris hey you saved you saved now how long what you finna do you see what i'm saying so what we have to understand is that everybody is a human and people respond to you a man responding to you if you weak he gonna you make him a different man because humans read and react if you strong you make him a different man if he don't want to become a different man if you strong what you do you walk away if you settle and he's not growing that mean you weak so you reinforce the behavior see every action has an equal or greater reaction so you have to take responsibility for your energy you gotta take responsibility for your mindset you have to take responsibility for your choices and your decisions and your actions and you cannot this the biggest mistake that women make is depending on a man to be a man without first becoming a woman and vice versa a man depending on a woman to be a woman without him first becoming a man so if a man come and all he want to do is flaunt money and all he want to do with that flaunt money guess what a good classy woman will become a city girl think about it nah sit down and really see let's see this thing we look to argue so much that we don't just sit down and think [Music] sit down and think about this thing now if if you meet a man and on the first day he brings you a louisville time bag and he take you to get fillet midnight with asparagus with uh red wine that costs 150 a bottle how you gonna feel just sit just right now right now i want you to cut you a piece of um and this and then sip your red one and then look at that louisville time boss that orange boss and just take that in you finna feel a certain way it's going to change your demeanor it's going to change how you feel like right there you might be like [Music] i think he could get it oh my god let me get these negative thoughts out my mind trying to be celibate so you start to feel different nah let's say birthday bomb you got all this stuff he gets you he gets you a louis bag a gucci bag he gets you a tore bert sander so now let's say this on your birthday then come christmas he give you a 25 gift card now see the first you you would have been okay with a 25 gift card when y'all were dating because you you're not expecting nothing you you not a city girl you a country girl you're a rural girl you hit me you're a metropolitan girl but see now that he'd engage you phillip mitner and asparagus and louisville time now on the next time when he get your 25 gift card you in your feeling you see i'm saying you your energy can be changed based on how a man treats you your expectations can be changed based on how a man treats you so that's human nature and so if we at the grocery store now and i hit your car with my dough what you finna do and then we hash that out we talked through that what are you doing you seen my car and you just gonna slam your door into my car oh yeah you finna pay for this you finna pay for this i'm calling the police right now cause this is a ding i'm gonna need a whole new paint job on this door do you got insurance you better be insured because listen here up i think my neck hurt now i want pip too you got ten thousand dollars pip because when you hit that door the whole car show up now my neck hurt so now you became a whole another person sister brenda gotta hook up sister james yeah everything okay is everything okay because i since i've never seen you like this so now she's shocked in the paw because she's like whoa you are usher on the board i just put my ties in your bucket and now you cussing this look this nice man out this nice gentleman this is the son of the lord so now you can became a whole new person and but don't understand and realize that your energy can shift the relationship and the way a man views you and the way a man treats you and the ma and the way a man respond to you and you just expect i cannot if i had me a dollar for every time a woman done said oh [Applause] you need to tell the men how to be men because it's so many grown boys as you call it and you need to teach these men how to be men instead of telling us women we got enough messages we already good people we already know how to be great winner it's men who have the problem if i had me a dollar every time i don't read that i heard that well look at him man bill me and bill gates will be playing poker you hit me me and warren buffer to be on the yacht you hear me listen you have to stop worrying about what a man know and don't know and what a man do and don't do and you have to first become independent yourself because understand understand me here the good men they are they doing the work they already know this too just like you already know this but you want to argue they already know this too good man doing the work the good i don't have to just like see this thing man no me and know right from wrong when it comes to relationship because men know men every man that come on my video he already know what i'm talking about to be honest with you he could we could try it chill hit your play boy yeah yeah take table seating play one hey just you know just teach you a lesson just tell them you know what they need to hear go ahead all right y'all mm-hmm yeah all right let me help you out back you see what i'm saying he already he could do this what i'm doing but see women don't know men women don't understand men that's why i have to teach this that's why but a man already know what i'm talking about he already know there between a grown boy and a grown man that won't be on here wasting my breath that's why i talk to the men on friday friday for the man that's it that's it because i'm a man i already know what men know and don't know they all a man already gets it it's women who go into a relationship like this wide-eyed like a deer it's women who go into the relationship wide out like a deer and remember remember the analogy i told you picture a deer standing in the middle of a road and a four f-150 a barreling down that road 60 miles an hour and that deer just standing there [Music] come on look like bambi yeah yeah and and the deer then stood on a high legs and thrown out our front two arms because she think the f-150 finna couldn't give her a hug and that f-150 going 150 miles an hour that deer split in pieces that's how women doing in relationships today you going into a relationship wide-eyed with your arms open thinking you finna get a hug and don't realize this grown boy coming to barrel over you because you don't know what you think you know because you too good for a relationship video because you too sophisticated because you wear your hair natural and because you don't do perms and because you're vegan and because all of this hip because you talk to the stars and the suns and the moon and you thank you clairvoyant and you do tarot cards because of all this here you think that you too sophisticated and educated to have a honest man give you relationship insight from a male perspective oh you above that that is beneath you we need to get past women getting advice from men online that's how you feel that's why you get dog back that's why you lost faith in men that's why you ready to eat you some peach cobbler because you tired of singing on microphone at the microphone and just having a sole throat and all you got to show for it is a shot though so you ready to go get use of peach cobbler because you tired of being did wrong why because you are above this hill dialogue you above a married fateful man who used to be a cheater woman as a dog and grown boy giving you some insight from the male perspective are you two educated for that uh youtube you just so mature another level you're not talking about what tony guys talk about you are into narcissistic abuse that is your level narcissistic of you tony guys is down here on grown boy university i'm up here dealing with narcissistic abuse that is beneath me see that's the thing that's why you end up getting hurt that's why you get lied to that's why you ready to be with a woman because you tired of being dogged out by men it's a lot of women today who going to be with a woman out of exhaustion was not born that way was not born that way trust me when i tell you i know plenty of them i got family members trust went on tape got in a relationship got punched in the eye literally got punched in i oh i like women eyes i like women i'm like huh so what you got going get what a woman just cuz you got cheated on by a man it's like so you just giving up not huh you just giving up yeah i'm tired of it i had a lady tell me a long time and she said i'm gonna be winning because i'm a woman and i understand women and i understand what a woman needs and i want to understand what i need so i'm just be with one because it's just too exhausting being with a man i said all right all right go ahead go ahead hey god bless you just between you and the lord i don't know all right you see what i'm saying that's what happens when a dream is deferred what likes to heal say he said fester and runs over that's sore that wound so when you don't address it when you don't heal when you don't take and put that ointment on there put that band-aid on now but then let it get a little out to and you take care of that wound you didn't been cheated on you'd have been conor mcgregor you don't went through it you didn't seen it all done it all you didn't felt it you didn't been at the lowest of the low guess what you got to grow when you don't seen the lowest of the low you got to grow because that's where you get your roots at see that's that's where you get your strength at that's where you grow from and that's what you got to understand and realize that it's on you to grow you got to grow you cannot settle you cannot settle you have to be in a place where you say i'm gonna get the knowledge i'm gonna heal my heart and then i'm gonna move forward like i've never been hurt before my daddy taught me that people in the shoulder stole stole the quote cause i made it go viral when i said you have to love like you've never been hurt before my dad taught me when i was 23 years old trying to get back in good graces with my wife after i had went to the streets and she kept me to the curb he said son you got to love like you've never been hurt before and when i got on social media and my social media started to blow up you know and go viral i tweeted that that started going viral now you see all these love pages writing that well nobody's saying that that came tony guys haven't seen you yeah me and now i seen probably everybody book and i had to think about that thing and that's what i want you to think about because that's what i had to do so i had to get over because see a lot of things a lot of time what men do men do the same thing men have bitterness toward women a lot of men have bitterness toward women because a woman cheated on them because a woman didn't want him you know in the ninth grade that could have happened to me i was dating a girl i thought she was pretty prettiest girl in the school come to find out she's sleeping with i'm in the ninth grade she's sleeping with a 12th grade dropout he's supposed to be in 12th grade but hadn't dropped out of school she's sleeping with him i remember i'm being cool i was cool with his younger brother who was about my age i go over today house i go and hit i go in the older brother room he give me a picture of my girlfriend he said hey man he got a picture of your girl a picture of my you give me a picture of my girlfriend well well hey well thank you all right thank you i ain't really real like what was going on now i understand later as i got older oh it was true what they were saying you see what i'm saying something like that happened to a man and that right there is what birth see me i i wasn't in love i i still was you know doing my thing so but that right there what happened to me dating this young lady and then she's telling me no i can't have none but then going and giving it to a grown man who 18. i'm 15 trying to get me some telling me no and giving to the 18 18 19 year old 20 year olds that right there they didn't everybody know but me that right there is what birth this here mgtow the men going their own way that's why they going their own way because the woman a woman cheated on them that's why they going their own way a woman cheated on them or a woman stole their money woman slept with a best friend a one a woman broke their heart naughty now they're going their own way the red pill that's why they taking their red hill that's why they own that field because of what a woman did wrong ain't got nothing to do with the government ain't got nothing to do with raise is what a woman is man hurt they hurt they hurt so men do the same thing so that's what you got to understand men have to work on that women have to work on that but all we responsible for is our heart i couldn't fix my wife heart i couldn't worry about what her heart was because if her her heart wasn't in the right place it would have been my job to see where her heart is i gotta go i excuse myself hey it's been nice knowing i got to go you see what i'm saying that's what i would have to do and that's what you got to do so as you healing you getting the knowledge you looking at what happened you going through the events if you can afford coaching get coaching we got coaches on mymentor.life as you've been seeing me interview someone on saturdays as cheap as 25 an hour there's no excuse just get somebody to talk through it and say okay so um six months in i found uh texting his phone to his ex-girlfriend telling her that he misses her and he loves her what do you think about that just talk to it i can have you come talk to my six-year-old and he tell you well that's not nice that's that's that's i don't think that's nice um yeah that's i don't that's mean my six-year-old tell you that and you oh really yeah you know what you're right i think i'm gonna move on with my life so are you talking to a grown coach from my mentor.life oh you're gonna get the real 25 don't don't be don't get mad complaining about my hourly rate that's why i created this so that if you can't afford my hourly rate that's just that's my hourly rate that's what i have to do for my lifestyle and that's ten percent that's ninety that's a ninety percent discount people talk tony why are you trying that's a 90 discount based on my level of business what the industry tell me i should be charging i'm charging 90 less i'm charging 10 or what the industry experts say tony this is what you're supposed to charge for a one hour consult of your time based on your businesses your business model and what you have going on you see what i'm saying so understand this don't get mad and and this what hurt people to do oh but the book is 26 before shipping you see that's why i'm not reading books because this is they just in it for the money and so now hurt people will hurt more and stay broke stay disgusted bro busted and disgusted looking like who shot john and forgot to kill him because they'll get mad at somebody else taking their pain out at somebody else i can't stand red lights it's like i'm trying to get to work and you want to be on red for a minute and a half and will just stay hurt and be upset instead of doing the work and healing i got to go i got to go work out got to go train take the hat off spray my hairline on it go and get in the gym so this is what you got to understand you have to sit down and do the work sit down and do the work and get the healing and don't just read it or listen to it write it write it down and then remember the little jar with all the notes in your brain with all the notes in there just pull out an old note put a new note in pull out an old note put a new note in and just keep doing that just keep doing that and then what's going to happen you renewing your you renewing your mind so now you i know i'm worthy i know i'm blessed i know i'm able i know i'm capable i know i'm gonna attract love i'm doing the work and i got my body where i wanted to be and i got my career where i wanted to be i didn't got my life where i wanted to be and i got my relationship with god where i wanted to be i got my routine i know what i'm doing at 7 00 a.m tomorrow i know what i'm doing at 9 00 pm thursday i got a routine i got a day planned i've given my days direction i got structure in my life you see what i mean get to that place to where that is truly independence when you working on you you have to keep working a lot of time people will come and and they'll say hey tony you know i need this but i can't afford it guess what keep working because that's a part of your growth if people come and give you everything then you never grow you never grow i had a family member who got a lot of money and taken care of and make money come to me and ask me for money i can't do it you have to learn how to budget what you have cause if you misspend what you have and i just come and get you mo you're not gonna get there but you can afford it you just got to spend differently you got the inner neck so if you didn't got on the internet that means you can afford a book or a course it just may take you longer but that's also a part of your growth because in your growth you're either learning how to earn more money or you're learning how to add a stream of income or you're learning how to budget your money better or are you focusing on what you need to focus on see a lot of times people say you know hey i'm living in the shelter but i'm ready to be a life coach no no no no no no no no no see first let's focus on working with the shelter to help you get a job then let's focus on keeping that job and saving to get you a car then let's focus on continuing that job continually saving to save up for first and last month's rent then let's get you some furniture let's get your lights and your water on okay then let's continue saving then take the life coach certification because we speak from where we are so no it's not the time and place to be a life coach giving somebody else advice from the shelter let's not know let's let's work in order let's work in order let's let's heal us first let's do the work on us first see me i'm not no health and wellness coach why because i had a cake pop last night with some mango nectar and some ginger ale so i'm not going to coach on health and wellness right now but listen here when i get on all water when i get on all water and i'm eating good and healthy you're not going to be able to tell i'm finna be health and wellness coach okay now listen this is what you got to do i'ma have a whole video health and wellness universe okay this is what you got to do you got to get up you got to have three glasses of water and i just did it yesterday not for the first day but i'm finna teach you today okay look have you three glasses of water all right then what you want to do you want to crunch on you some broccoli all right then you want to have your raw bell pepper for lunch and i'm trying to take you through that i'm going to take you through that health and well cause i don't did it you see what i'm saying but right now right now i had this mango nectar with that ginger all that sugar i can't teach you about no health and wellness right now but what i can teach you about is loving relationships why cause my relationship perfect it's happy and i call it perfect because because i because our biggest argument is who yelling too much at the soccer game or who left the toilet seat up you see what i'm saying so i'm so i that's why i call it perfect because ain't no cheating ain't no lying ain't no stealing ain't no malibu like manipulating ain't no deceiving ain't no going to bed mad ain't no breakup to make up so in this day and time that's considered a perfect relationship so that's what i teach on healthy love and relationship so when you heal you see when you heal your heart then you able to move forward and you attract what's for you you attract what's for you see i don't do too much teaching on business and all of that even though i do business but i understand the favor of god so i can only teach so much because i can't teach favor i can't teach the favor of god you see what i'm saying so that's why i'm trying to sell it to people as oh pay ten thousand dollars for this course on business because of what i'm built in bits because i know a large part is the favor of god you can implement everything i implement and unless your life right with god the way he shine down on you you ain't gonna have similar results so you have to get to a place to where you know your heart is ready to receive see you can't you can't look at me and my wife relationship with this couple relationship if you don't look at the work that went in place if see see a lot of time what what people look at they don't realize that i did 10 hours of work a day all right all right you see what i'm saying you know what what what 10 hours yes while i was working on them people job for eight hours going to work 30 minutes at work eight hours coming home 30 minutes that's nine hours right now before i went to work i get up at 12 at noon because i worked late and then i stayed up late working on my business i stay up three four o'clock in the morning sleep till 12 i got from 12 to three i got to leave home at three to get to work by 3 30 and work from 3 30 to 11 30. and in that 12-3 i still be listening to audio books listening to podcasts them eight hours them driving to work audio books podcasts eight hours at work audio book podcast one headphones in here the other one hanging out so i can hear my co-workers and hit my clients and yeah for countless months probably years it renewed my mind it renewed my spirit i heard so many lessons that i needed some people tell me that they just let my video play all day hey you better get unlimited that'll you better get unlimited data but see so listen you can't compare and that's how i tell my wife my wife taught me this the other day i said baby man i feel bad like i feel bad when i see the way the lord moving in our life and it's people who our same age or older that's right around us and i'm like i just want to give to everybody i want to bless everybody and like i want to buy everybody a car i want to buy everybody a house i want to buy everybody like so they can have some of the blessings that god has blessed us with and my wife said something to me she said you can't do that because when you look at these people how many of them put in the work that you put in how many of them sacrifice in the ways that you sacrifice so you have to understand that your reward is in direct correlation to your sacrifice and until you understand that and understand that god is not a man that he shall lie so as long as you arguing in the comments i remember one lady she came in the comments to argue and she missed the whole point of the video the point of the video is is you're not even healthy or whole until you stop feeling the need to argue with somebody that you disagree with on a public forum that is a sign of your brokenness that's a sign of your pain if you motivated and driven then what you would do is start your own pace to share the wisdom that you feel should be going out if you feel myself or somebody else is not sharing it the correct way to your liking if you feel that god has given you a revelation that is deeper and greater than what he's given me and other people who do what i do then if you healthy and whole and healed you're gonna start your own page if you still broken lost and confused you're going to argue in somebody comments that just point blank period that's why you never see me leave a comment you think i disagree with these celebrities that's out here doing this foolishness you think i disagree with these blog posts that these bloggers that posting stuff online and the stuff they post you think i agree with everything i see it just like you see it but do you see me in the comments no i ain't got time for it i got to go do the work god called me to do yeah i don't disagree but you'll hear about it on my platform while i'm doing the work that god called me to do i'm not arguing nobody to comment now what people don't realize is something as small as that that show that you still to hurt you are getting in the grocery store line you're arguing with the customer service you ripping customer service a new one it because you mad in your life what customer service did to you that that woman that's on customer service daddy just died two days ago and she got to come back to work because she got three kids to feed and you on there cursing her out like it's her company that mischarged you she don't own the company she worked for customer service so why you talking to her like that why you talking to the waiter like that that waiter is fighting back tears to come and take your order and now because you're order wrong she didn't go in the kitchen and cook it so what you going off on huffa you see what i'm saying see when you address your brokenness when you address your pain when you address this hurt guess what you start to heal all the way around see when i started to do this work i started to talk to the waitress and the way they're different i started to talk the customer service different i started to talk to the people that taking my order different i stopped tweeting people online that i disagree with i stopped going in comment sections i'll stop making fake accounts and fake pages to leave a comment to leave a negative because i stopped doing it i stopped hitting dislike i don't hit dislike on nobody youtube video if anything i'ma hit the like button i stopped doing that because i worked on me and i heal and so when i heal guess what i ain't want to bring pain or misery or confusion or drama to nobody else's life because i want to have peace in my own life and because i want to be peaceful i got to bring piece i got a radiate piece i can't go hit the dislike on somebody's video and then expect to be happy and peaceful in my in my life i can't go arguing somebody comments and then expect for that not for that negative toxic energy that i just spewed in in a debate in arguing to not run over into the rest of my day and then control my future conversation that i'm getting ready to have so now i'm on the phone talking to this person by the comment that i just left and they like listen i got other stuff to worry about then what comment you putting on youtube you send them on instagram on on facebook you see what i'm saying so when you really start to heal and you work on you you're gonna see your life change this ain't just about a relationship this ain't just about no relationship you're gonna see your life start to change in every interaction and you're gonna express yourself different you still could be strong you still could be direct i remember i went to the dylan show went to the dealership and had and had to get some work done they came back telling me oh it's going to take five thousand dollars and i had to cool i would cool come and collect i was able to look into the situation read them talk to themselves talk to the person let me talk to your boss talk to this boss sit down at the table like this all right let me talk to your boss talk to the ball went all the way up the ladder guess what the dealership did nine thousand dollars worth of service on my car on my wife truck it was my white truck did 9 000 worth of service for free because i'm healthy and i'm whole and i'm healed i was able to speak truth to power but i was able to talk just like i'm talking to you right now the words if i still was angry if i still was bitter if i still was broken i'd have been flipping table i'd have been going on y'all gonna fix this little car right now and that's that's what my daddy did guess what he ain't getting no results me and he'll talk about it we laughed about it he ain't getting the results i get what they and well his situation they ready to call the police we gotta call the police if i did that they would have called the police they had a police escort me and i probably wouldn't have made it out a lot cause if i'm angry and i'm mad and then i want to push the police i want to throw up my hands i want to do that guess what you know what they doing today unarmed or not they i wouldn't have made it my anger my disposition my frustration would have led me to getting a charge but because i'm healed i was able to speak truth to power cool calm and collected directly uh here you go bomb this this what i need this what happened this what i need to be done see y'all did this remember and because y'all did this this is what happened and because that happened this happened so all this falls back on y'all that's why i should not be liable for a single penny because this started with your actions with what your servicemen did you see i'm saying and they had them are you right you right all right well we gonna take care of this for you all right just like that see when you get healed in your life and man ain't gonna want to argue with you the man ain't gonna want to dog you out he'll rather tuck his tail between his legs and run than to deal with you because he know you god's daughter he know you living right he know you pure he know he mess over you with the pure heart that you brought to the table he know he mess over you he gonna be cursed the rest of his days he don't want that smoke with the lord almighty he got to come correct or he gonna get gone point blank period you attract what you become you attract what you become ain't gonna say what you are because you're becoming and you got to keep becoming and when you do that you're gonna see your life start to change in every area i changed i took the shackles off my mind my money changed my money changed when i stopped telling myself man i'm gonna go bro man i'm gonna go bro man i spend too much man i go broke when i stop saying that and i started saying man i got abundance man i got oh i got overflow i got in a better situation where i could budget better where i could do better with my money my relationship changed my money changed my work changed my energy change my mindset changed my friendships changed my connection collaborations changed everything changed when i change from the inside and that's what you got to do that's what you got to realize it is tony gatson god bless you we'll toss on

Channel: Tony Gaskins

Views: 55,703

Rating: 4.9646387 out of 5

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Id: 4lwCq9cSIlE

Length: 60min 0sec (3600 seconds)

Published: Mon Sep 28 2020