It Came From Tumblr #84 | Binge Compilation

okay farewell you cannot hold me accountable for accidentally making a homestuck reference what i've never read homestuck if you've recognized it that's your problem and it's your sin hey let's meet tonight i'm from user city want to meet hell yeah i've never met any hot chicks in user city it's a total backwater take me down to the user city where the grass is color and the girls are user preference bigfoot but fully shaved do you mean mr clean posts like this are why i have anxiety do you guys ever wonder why the students at hogwarts are afraid of shrieking shaq because it's haunted when they literally go to a school with ghosts wait what 9 a.m at school math class it's chill you're calm easy day then the teacher says pull out your last night's homework dark souls music ensues i found it and just chilling on my boobs after going outside to walk my dogs shadow of the colossus oh you're a fan of my writing name five of the unfinished stories sitting in my drafts you're just trying to outsource title generation ah [ __ ] i've been found out the amber bear amulet of neolithic hunter 3 500 years old i will never not reblog the 3 500 year old gummy bear ever wonder what happened to the dinosaurs this is a baby blue heron this baby blue heron killed the dinosaurs the idea of being married is so weird like what if i'm having a sad moment late at night and i want to cry in bed and then there's just some guy there no who's that i i don't want to do in that situation dad bod spider-man can't drive yeah well maybe he can but he's just a miserable parallel parker god [ __ ] damn it you can now buy a beanbag onesie so you can stay seated wherever you go now you too can be dummy thick man they just let anyone be a pixar mom these days huh the best trope in the world is when a character realizes that they're in love with another character and instead of being bashful or cute about it their internal monologue is just no god [ __ ] why cookie and milk cup i don't understand this picture at all egg oh now behold milk in a cookie cup oh it's a backwoods egg are you trying to tell me the center of an egg is a cookie i mean it makes cookies so yes so did anyone else's brain just stop processing information lately or is it just me i've been nodding along to things and just hoping that nobody asks any questions same i'd be a terrible superhero i'd be at home and see the signal calling me in the sky and be like i literally just sat down i'm sorry did you mean clint barton stout you disrespect hawkeye in this house how dare what if vampires aren't affected by the sun they just heard all the stories and decided to not push their luck what if you can eat asbestos and construction companies have been hoarding their delicious delicious asbestos for years you you get it 16 years of difference peter parker will never escape new york city transit hey that place was in madagascar me and myself you know you're annoying to be honest very good trope civilian is told stay in the car while hiro goes to confront the villain hero gets in over his head and all seems disaster civilian crashes card to villain me watching but they stand in the car yes this is very good honestly my new favorite phenomenon is the haiku coming in at the end of super serious posts it's like watching a super villain come to a crushing defeat and then getting run over by a roomba the haiku bot does not detect actual haiku the artistry of haiku is that every line contains a thought or an image that can be separated and still understood with the poem as the whole coming together to form a bigger idea or image the haikup just detects sentences of 575 syllables and calls it a day it's an insult to the art form reading an actual haiku can be a spiritual experience you sound like a damn elitist bastard from the school of snobbery you sound like a damn elitist bastard from the school of robbery hi cubot eight i detect haikus with the 575 format sometimes i make mistakes support me on paypal at haikubot gmail.com guys donate to them man this is weird but imagine like being an ancient doctor who believes in humors etc and surgery doesn't exist but you performed the first legit autopsy to learn about anatomy and you're like what the [ __ ] there's like objects in here and [ __ ] what the [ __ ] there's like objects in here and [ __ ] andreas visayas 1543. i like to keep my metabolism on her toes like what's it gonna be today hun complete starvation or 3 000 calories i knew as much as you [ __ ] literally me i'm crying i love mando's vibes imagine some guy rolling up to your shop in a beat-up honda civic he steps out wearing an armani suit he opens his wallet and offers you two dollars to fix his car you tell him it isn't enough but you'll fix it if he does the most dangerous thing you could think of he brings his toddler to do the job damn so how are you all coping with the tumblr facebook merger god we really are in hell aren't we please i got so scared you very much live up to your url literally felt my heart rate go up good to see this account is doing its job guys pewdiepie deleted his youtube channel you know the discontent i spread is incomparable to the horrific deception you forced into this world i'm having a salad for dinner well fruit salad actually it's mostly grapes okay it's all grapes fermented grapes it's wine i'm having wine for dinner hey is everything okay you haven't commented barking sounds under a picture of your favorite male character and i'm starting to get worried don't call me up like this you know what truly disgusts me being able to feel my own heartbeat it's bad i don't need to actively know what's going on in there don't need to feel that it's not in my business stop it never underestimate how little i know about everything ever two plus two is [ __ ] off read the first part no thoughts head empty only goth gingila it's adorable and i want 20. so why are you british was cursed by a malevolent warlock at birth is that any way to speak to your parents both of you to assume i was born of mortal means culinary students be like i got spaghetti dude at 11 50. culinary student's about to cheat i sure hope no one checks under my head listen listen it's a former culinary major you right though if you wouldn't go to someone for advice don't take their criticism either way whoa whoa whoa wow dude lp woke up and chose logic today and i don't know how to feel about that my husband has informed me that around two to three a.m he woke up to a muffled screaming and discovered that the cat has pulled open the tupperware drawer and crawled inside but her weight had closed the drawer and she was stuck inside and needed rescuing permission to laugh i mean i definitely laughed how does a cat open a cupboard drawer with a little criminal paws can we see the little criminal this cat is a delinquent hey her only crime is being more beautiful than everyone else false she also knocks over trash cans the evil baby tumbler is like wading through everyone else's garbage until you find something good and go ah this is good and take it and display it in your own pile of garbage oh the goblin market i love when you listen to a new song and you're like three seconds in and you're already like yes this pleases me it is mine my song all about me oh yes a fire truck or as my little cousin likes to call it a [ __ ] i hate when i go out in public and the public is there well now it seems the public is no longer in the public naive one but at what cost must of the corpse of everything i once held near be dug up again and re-animated into a monstrosity that barely resembles what i once loved must the sweet memories from my youth be snatched from within my very skull and paraded around the town square for all to see must we continue to play god with our old and tortured creations who beg to be put to rest this is about the icarly reboot by the way i'm sorry what hey stop calling you weeb i can't even afford a lifestyle once my brother's friend walked into his room and just started sniffing the air and went i smell a quarter and then walked over to a pile of clothes and moved it and picked up a quarter and i literally cannot stop thinking about it it's been like a year and it haunts me to this day i'm pretty sure he's a crow reincarnated why must snow turn into an eternal flashbang on sunny days um excuse me mother nature um yeah i kind of like my eyes so can you [ __ ] not okay not to be a theater nerd too much but tech crews including people who do lights sound costume sets and work backstage on shows deserve far more recognition for their hard work you're right though and finally spider-man oh dear god i never give up i never go back on my word that's my ninja way my dream is to become the greatest okage that way the whole village will stop disrespecting me and treat me like i'm somebody somebody my name is naruto uzumaki and i'm gonna defeat every single one of you believe it hello it's i am seymour except i am good this video don't question it anyway pm by dumb luck was infected with the big thing youtube won't let you say and cannot scram so he has gathered a bunch of voice acting buddies to take over his job for today and i hope you all enjoy mary crimbo serotonin in this economy this is it we found the ultimate specimen in millennial humor we did it everyone we did it i have an overactive imagination so that translates into fears of a lot of things one of those things happens to be the dark however i i'm extremely fond of cryptids i see peace ghosts and and any other weird creatures basically if it looks cool i love it so i accidentally removed my fear of what's watching me in the dark you see by thinking oh don't worry they're just a friend you come into my chilies barbecue sauce on your titties and disrespect my valentina white bag ah [ __ ] i can't believe you've done this you're disrespecting a future u.s army soldier i think i know more about american girl dolls than you i've got the power of god and anime on my side evening grumpy no nope not giving anyone the satisfaction today i learned that in 1508 autumn foss pressed charges on rats for destroying barley crops the lawyer representing the rats argued that the court's summons wasn't specific enough to his clients and that alton's cat population made it unsafe for his clients to come to court the rats were acquitted i want to meet the guy who offered to represent the rats business card says rat lawyer today i learned on the set of the princess bride andre the giant once let out a 16 second fart and brought production to a standstill nobody said anything except director rob reiner who said are you okay andre to which andre replied william now boss legends only im crying the lack of a comma meant that for a full minute i interpreted this as him declaring himself the new boss i can't take it anymore god made a baby lynx without any regards for proportions and i can't stop thinking about that look at this his feet too big for his goddamn hee how dull for you to live your life without any else to die on you on your vast flat barren planes of compromise acceptance and accommodation while i reign supreme over the lush rolling highlands of stupid [ __ ] i have irrationally chosen to stake my entire identity on as someone who was terrified of having their own opinion this is truly inspiring the hills are alive with all the [ __ ] i give on select topics you know what i don't care anymore i enjoy things and i am going to enjoy things and i don't care if other people don't enjoy things that i do i do not have to defend myself about every single thing i have ever liked i do not have to preface every opinion with i know it's garbage for it to be valid i like thanks and i like liking thanks and i don't care what other people say and now that i've gotten that off my chest let me read the tumblr post for you pat you ever have just one of those times where you and your friend just want to try something for a photo just for fun not really expecting anything and then like we'll never be able to repeat this you look like angelic ethereal beings from a gay musical set in the turn of the century american south nominated for like five oscars well done that's exactly what i told him to go for right before we jumped i'm so happy we achieved this me and history class wow humanity has been through some fascinating times i wonder if i'll ever live through major historical events mean no no no no no no i want to get off this ride it was supposed to be space travel it was supposed to be space travel it was supposed to be space travel it was supposed to be space shuttle it was supposed to be spaceship it's just silence but it keeps getting faster this is stressing me out children this is debt a geology field trip my ancestors watching me dump an entire stick of cinnamon two cloves an allspice berry and a generous grating of nutmeg into my tea sweetened with white sugar and a loaded with cream while i sit in my clean warm house surrounded by books 25 plus outfits for different occasions and six pairs of shoes in a building heated so well i have the windows open in mid-autumn our daughter prospers we are proud of her she has never labored in a field but knows riches we could not have imagined i like this so much better than the idea that our ancestors would be embarrassed or ashamed of us for being soft or some crap like that gatorade and weed can cure literally anything the government doesn't want you to know this the reason it took so long for them to develop a covet vaccine is that they were too busy covering up the fact that gatorade and weed can cure coronavirus me when the electrolytes hit [Music] i began typing on an old typewriter a werewolf is steering a submarine but then i stop i crunch up the paper and throw it into the fire the world isn't ready yet for captain harry mchowells the submarine pilot who is secretly a werewolf hiding from the moon yes it is okay is anyone else like exhausted just way too tired mentally and physically and you look at other people your age who seem to be doing fine and you feel so dysfunctional and broken because normal adult tasks and responsibilities just feel way too overwhelming and you can't cope and sorry i got a bit overwhelmed there sometimes when i'm struggling with self-care i remind myself that i am at my most basic a hamster in an enclosure i need food and water and a safe environment i need enrichment and the right level of stimuli i get exhausted if exposed to too much stress and handling i am a being with needs and i deserve to have those needs met by a responsible and loving caregiver i just happen to also be that caregiver when i think about it like that it's easier somehow also i am round and fury and my teeth grow at a spectacular rate so i had a nightmare last night and that i told kermit the frog that i found him very funny and he got terribly offended and he started going on a rant and ended with him telling me he was going to set his house on fire and make me eat the ashes don't know why that was the way he went with it but who am i to question a show miss legend there committee frog here i'm gonna make you eat the ashes of your children i'm back still you're making progress if you can realize how dumb you were yesterday decatur harold illinois may 18 1934. man well well thank you old guy i may be a shambling socially awkward anxious mess with no time management or conversation skills this woman will put bees in your office jokes on her i'm starting an apiary good night to sexy evil people only everyone adding character this is wrong except whoever added doofenshmirtz you you have taste therapist tell me about some of your happy childhood memories my my what you know what this year sucked so much in so many ways it was painful unfair cruel and difficult to say the least the new year won't magically erase all the problems and issues we faced in 2020 but i genuinely hope you and your loved ones are able to catch a break i hope 2021 in whatever way is possible is kinder to you i hope healing comes fast and i hope all the heaviness put upon you starts to lessen seriously anyone who thinks that january 1st is going to magically fix everything that happened this year naive is frick new years is a time to reflect on all the dogs and cats we've seen this year and to look forward to all the dogs and cats we'll see in this year to come now that's more like it being on tumblr is just so cozy you know what i mean instagram and twitter are all flashy and loud but tumblr is as cozy as my bedroom with scented candles on a cold november night i'll know what part of tumblr this person's on but i won't find it uh bro what's with the diagonal red lines in your face wait a minute oh [ __ ] are you anime blushing because you're in love with me bro it's okay dude you could tell me bro we're bros i don't want to socialize today i did that yesterday i'd rather lock myself in my room and build legos all day i know that feeling the opposite of formaldehyde is casual the jekyll bruh i can't believe i read this post with my own [ __ ] eyes item cadbury crab eggs appear to be standard confectionary but when eaten alive and angry blue crab emerges presumably attacking the eater this is just part of maryland culture i know this is dumb but i think that australia exists like the ocean is largely unexplored there there could very well be a fallen empire we haven't found it yet i'm in atlantis your [ __ ]

Channel: P.M. Seymour

Views: 192,317

Rating: 4.9787974 out of 5

Keywords: voice, audio, P.M. Seymour, comedy, reading, discord, twitter, tumblr, social media, posts, reading posts, late night blogging, blogging, editing, not for kids

Id: epVEohgbszQ

Length: 20min 27sec (1227 seconds)

Published: Thu Dec 31 2020