How BAD is GIGLI???

so back around 2002 Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez were in a relationship together and it was pretty much everywhere was all over the media and those crappy celebrity TV shows because apparently when two celebrities start banging each other everyone's just got to know about it anyways after a while it became pretty obvious that people were starting to get a little annoyed from hearing about it myself included so why not take the two people that everyone is sick and tired of hearing about and put them in a movie together because I mean what could go wrong Geely was released in 2003 and was quickly labeled as one of the worst movies of all time by critics and audiences and pretty much anyone that loves cinema now personally I think a lot of that hate came from the fact that everyone was sick of Bennifer being shoved down their throats at the time but even ignoring all of that I can honestly say that I still think this movie easily deserves to be on this show so when the movie came out it completely bombed and I mean bombed like seven million box office on a 75 million dollar budget bomb now I have seen some variation as to what those numbers actually were but it really doesn't matter all you need to know is that the movie was a complete failure and that's it period there's no real debating that anyone who can use a calculator or even just basic subtraction can tell you that unless of course you're in the business of losing money then it was a success start with a smoke cleared and Bennifer split and all was said and done I have to say that Ben Affleck kind of rose from the ashes and completely redeemed himself in my eyes he went on to direct some really great movies like Gone Baby Gone and the town and Argo and sure he acted in some shitty movies peppered along the way but I mean come on you gotta give the guys some credit it's not easy to bounce back from something like that now Gigli is an interesting film because at no point throughout the movie did I ever really like any of the characters when you're writing a script it's probably a good idea to create at least some likeable characters especially the protagonist because otherwise no one's going to care what happens to them the only character that I even remotely cared about in this movie was Brian because I felt bad for him because he had no idea what was going on throughout the entirety of this movie kind of like me so ben affleck plays this guy zealey who's really just a wannabe gangster he works for this guy named Lewis who tells him to go kidnap this guy named Brian who happens to be mentally challenged as well as the brother of a federal prosecutor so he goes to get Brian in this I don't know the movie doesn't really tell us you just have to assume it's some sort of mental institution or mental hospital he just convinces Brian to go with him and then they leave and that's it so there's no real security here I guess they just let random people come in and take them people with obvious mental problems yeah I don't I don't see any problem with that at all nothing could go wrong there so Brian wants to go to the Baywatch wherever that is Geely takes them to his apartment instead but not before pulling some real patronizing bullshit like taking his flashlight out of his car and pretending it's a walkie-talkie so that he can find out that the Baywatch is closed Benji Lee uses his phone which he could have just used with Brian but whatever that's assuming the movie makes sense to call Lois and Lewis seems pretty impressed that he managed to pick up Brian so quick Julie takes Brian back to his apartment and this is where we're introduced to Jennifer Lopez's character Ricky the next few minutes are incredibly bad it's amazing that for two people that were romantically involved in real life there is almost no chemistry between them on-screen and that's not just in this scene that's throughout the entire movie Ricky takes Julie aside and tells him she's amazed at how much of a cup he actually is why how is he screwing up what has he done wrong so far he went out and got Brian like he was supposed to do very quickly I might add and with very little resistance along the way anyways really calls Lewis and finds out that Lewis hired Ricky to help him because he doesn't trust Julie with the job yes he doesn't trust him with the job of kidnapping someone which he's already done all he's got to do now is just hold on to the guy and if he doesn't trust him with the job then why did he give it to him in the first place well maybe Julie did something to make Lewis doubt his competence yeah that would make sense too bad nothing like that ever happens in fact like I said before Lewis seems impressed with how quickly Julie managed to get it done so we're already what like 15 minutes into this movie and already the plot sucks so by now it's pretty obvious that Julie is just a poser and Ricky is what exactly I'm serious what what is she what is she supposed to be here I mean she lies about her reputation but reputation as what a gangster because she comes off as more like a caretaker with an edge I really have no idea what exactly she's supposed to be she just says oh I'm under contract I'm a contractor that's what just a person who does oh maybe this scene will help us find out so what do you normally hire out for how come I never seen you around before somewhere else Larry oh okay so even the movie doesn't know what she's supposed to be now that's fantastic because she's supposed to be this mafia enforcer because the her performance is not communicating that to me she's just playing Jennifer Lopez in a shitty movie you know at this point the most convincing performance is done by Justin Bartha who plays Brian and just when you think you've seen how bad the dialogue is gonna get there are parts from this dinner scene that feel like they were taken straight out of the room I'm serious Julie starts talking to himself in the bathroom in a scene that goes on probably about ten times longer than it should it's just scenes like this that dragged the movie on forever and make the two-hour film feel like it just just doesn't stop the second that Christopher Walken comes into the movie it's like a breath of fresh air hey maybe there'll be some actual entertainment now he plays a cop who basically tells Julie that the brother of a federal prosecutor has been kidnapped and he thinks that he's involved in some way after he leaves Brian starts complaining that he's hungry and there's a pretty simple solution here I mean if I was in this situation I'd probably just get Ricky to look after Brian while I left got some takeout food and brought it back problem solved right well the only problem with that idea is that it makes sense so obviously it has no place in this script instead they take Brian out in broad daylight to a place where they can be seen by you know other people or cops but that's okay because they got a disguise for Brian yeah a hat in a jacket that's that's fantastic I mean only a crime-stopping genius could see through this masterwork of trickery but then again it's probably still a better disguise and anything Dana Carvey can come up with Ricky threatens a kid by describing how to pull out someone's eyeball which really doesn't come off the least bit threatening especially when she finishes it off with this oh one more thing sports are all well and good but very hard to earn a living it so I want you guys to study hard and keep your grades up all right okay everyone yes okay wow what a gangster I can totally see where she got that hardcore reputation then there's a scene between Bennifer which has again no chemistry at all and is extremely painful to sit through yes they managed to take a scene where Jennifer Lopez is doing yoga and talking about sex and make it boring I didn't even think that was possible so Luis calls G Lee and tells him to cut off Brian's thumb and send it to the courthouse but G Lee is too squeamish to do it I mean what was he thinking did he think that he could just join up with the Mafia and avoid all the violent parts yeah I want to be an organized crime but I'm gonna have to had to put the kibosh on anything that involves hurting people so then Ricky's girlfriend shows up out of nowhere and starts freaking out on her because she thinks she's been cheating and goes ahead and slits her wrists because I mean why not this whole movie is just a bunch of terrible characters doing stupid things anyways but it's a good thing she came into the story because it's the perfect excuse to get them to a hospital where they come up with the brilliant idea of stealing a thumb from a corpse in the morgue because guess what Ricky doesn't want to cut off Brian's thumb either Wow I'm shocked especially since throughout this movie we've been seeing how much of a cold-blooded criminal Ricky really is oh wait no we have it so somehow an argument about fingernails and whether or not Julie is gay turns into sex I guess what the sex scene is boring too then we have this scene where Al Pacino shows up as the mob boss and it's really just in time because his performance actually jolts some electricity into this disaster it was just enough to keep me from turning off this movie entirely and just taking the rest of this review I'm just kidding I would never really do that after they decide to leave town they see some sort of film production on a beach and of course Brian freaks out because he thinks this is the Baywatch so they drop him off there where he kind of meets this girl and I'm being serious when I tell you that the ending this movie is excruciating ly long it feels like it's never going to end seriously my finger was just hovering over the stop button for a good five minutes but it finally does come to a conclusion and with some brilliant dialogue what you know I bet you look awesome in some mascara never now as most of you know I've seen a lots of bad movies and Gigli is no exception I've seen some critics call this the worst movie of all time and while I do agree it's one of the worst I've ever seen I have a hard time calling well pretty much any movie the worst movie of all time but it definitely deserves to be on the list of the worst movies ever made I'm not disputing that at all so guys well I can't say exactly what my next bad movie review is going to be on mostly because I don't even know yet I will tell you that in October I'll be doing some horror movies and I'll give you a few hints one of them involves a lot of balloons and it's actually the movie that inspired me to start this channel back all those years ago it just it's never reviewed it I don't know why and the other is well it's actually two movies from a horror movie franchise that takes place on Halloween gee I wonder what franchise that could be you're terrible at giving hints mark that's just come on [Music]

Channel: FanboyFlicks

Views: 330,619

Rating: 4.9197521 out of 5

Keywords: Gigli (Film), Romantic Comedy (Film Genre), bennifer, Ben Affleck (Celebrity), Jennifer Lopez (Celebrity), Al Pacino (Celebrity), Christopher Walken (Celebrity), Comedy (Film Genre), Comedy, Funny, Hilarious, Bad movies, movie reviews, Bad Movie (Film), movie review, Reviews, fanboy flicks, horrible movies, worst movies, worst movies ever made

Id: XMkVRF5BsxQ

Length: 12min 6sec (726 seconds)

Published: Sat Sep 27 2014