How BAD is Lady in the Water???

lady in the water is a movie written and directed by M night Shyamalan based off a bedtime story he used to tell his kids the movies about a water nymph who lives in the pool of a Philadelphia apartment complex and who needs to find a writer whose book will better the future of humanity M night Shyamalan casts himself as this genius writer whose views on society inspire the next president of the United States and ultimately change the world I still there I haven't uh haven't clicked on the sidebar yet alright let's do this now before I start this video it should make it clear that I'm not just hating on Shyamalan for the sake of hating on Shyamalan I'm pretty sure I said this before in one of my other videos but I really did enjoy the sixth sense and I actually enjoyed unbreakable even more now there's a story that goes along with the making of this movie and you can find it in the book the man who heard voices or how M night Shyamalan risked his career on a fairy tale I don't know if that title was a reference to Stanley Kubrick but just the thought of linking Stanley Kubrick and M night Shyamalan makes me feel kind of sick and I haven't even opened the book yet anyways the book is hilarious and it makes M night Shyamalan come off as a completely delusional egomaniac even though the book is written from the perspective of worshiping him pretty much now if you didn't know Disney actually produced and distributed all of M night Shyamalan films since success if you don't believe me you can look this up it's true we're not talking Disney cartoons or anything like that we're talking about subsidiaries of the Walt Disney Company the executive from Disney who worked with M night Shyamalan on his previous movies was Nina Jacobson and apparently when he sent her the script she had some issues with it and overall just didn't really get it so there was a dinner meeting between some of the Disney executives and M night Shyamalan and I'm just going to quote this right from the book what are you saying Nina what are you saying the script needs three weeks three months nina said nothing her face said not three weeks not three months not ever you're saying I've lost my mind no we're not yes yes you are okay I mean what do you what do you even say to that how are you supposed to deal with people like that and then there's much more to the story than that but that's just a small sample of the just complete insanity that goes on throughout this book of course once I read all that of course I did some more digging you should seriously check out this video where Johnny Depp describes his interaction with Shyamalan as the strangest thing that's ever happened to him in cinema yet Johnny Depp said that but fall people Johnny Depp the strangest thing that happened to Johnny Depp in cinema was a conversation with M night Shyamalan just let that sink in for a second seriously watch the video okay this has nothing to do with the review but it's it's hilarious I'll post the link in the description all right get enough track here I got a review this movie so try and stay focused now I know there's some of you that actually like this movie and that's I mean it's totally fine I can actually see why some people do like this movie I can see what the movie was trying to do but I'm just going based on my personal experience watching the film which can be just summed up as boring I was bored completely the first time I watched it and even the second time I watched it for the purposes of doing this review I was still extremely bored but this movie was just so heavily requested by some of you that I just couldn't ignore it I even remember somebody on the Facebook page referring to it as a total dumpster fire and that always stuck with me because that's just that's an amazing analogy now it should go without saying but I'm just going to clarify this anyways just like all of my other movie reviews this is just my personal opinion of the movie okay I just wanted to make that clear for all the Shyamalan fans out there because I know there are some out there or believers as he would call them seriously that's in the book - I have to say that I do like Paul Giamatti in this movie I pretty much like him in pretty much any movie so I just thought I'd throw that out there a little piece of positivity the movie starts with Paul Giamatti squishing a bug with a broom handle and he's just squishing the hell out of that thing and I'm just curious what was it you said it was a big hairy bug and he had a job at it several times before was dead so I'm just wondering what it was I'm not this doesn't make the movie bad or anything like that I'm just just want to see the bug so Paul's the superintendent at this apartment complex in Philadelphia and of course it takes place in Philadelphia because this movie was written by M night Shyamalan some movie critic moves into the apartment complex and of course he's a complete arrogant douchebag because this movie was written by M night Shyamalan one night policy someone swimming in the pool after hours so he goes into the pool and when he doesn't find them he gets out of the pool and starts running come on Paul everyone knows you're not supposed to run near the pool and near the superintendent you should know better besides why were you running in the first place anyways he knocks himself out and slips back into the pool then he wakes up and there's just some chick in his room she tells him she's a narf and that she's from the blue world and her name is story and yes I said story that's her name anyways he tries taking her outside but there's this creature that looks like a dog covered in grass that's called a scrunt and that thing just scares the shit out of them completely and they run back inside so he asked this lady mrs. Choi and she tells him all about this old bedtime story where the narf has to be seen by the human that was chosen for her which will awaken something in the chosen one and then a giant eagle will take away the nerf to freedom story tells Paul that she has to find a writer in order to go home and he's writing something extremely important and guess what it turns out it's M night Shyamalan because why wouldn't it be never saw that one coming that just might be the best twist that he's ever done in fact the most hilarious part of the movie was the fact that upon hearing this story about a magical water fairy and mythical creature surrounding the building none of the tenants questioned it no one says hey you know what maybe this is bullshit I know that would be my reaction upon hearing all of this I would probably just assume she was some sort of drug addict who was completely tripping balls one night and just fell into the pool oh my god are you okay I'm a fairy from a faraway land yeah okay yeah did you not see the sign nope that sign now I get it it's supposed to be a fairy tale but just because it's a fairy tale doesn't mean that everyone has to just blindly believe something magical is going on even in Jack and the Beanstalk Jack's mom freaks out on him when she finds out he spent all their money on magic beans she's all like thanks a lot for selling our cow for a bunch of lousy beans moron how we gonna eat you ever think about that I'm paraphrasing of course anyway she gets scratched by this grunt and apparently this grunt has some poison in its claws then we learned there's this special mud that can heal her wounds and there's these super evil monkeys that live in the trees that punish the scrunch whenever they break the rules of this mythical world but what are these rules and if these monkeys are so evil then why would they give a shit about who's being fair so Paul goes on a quest to find this mud and of course he finds a bunch of secret passages inside of the pool that lead him to the I don't know narf house and how does he know what the mud even looks like it seems to me he finds it quite easily I gotta say I wouldn't even know where to start and I probably wouldn't think that this was it at first glance this just looks like a lump of clay with a bunch of jagged stones in it yeah just looking at that I'm convinced that rubbing that all over your skin will heal your scratches not create a bunch of new ones so in this scene story tells the future and apparently the book Shyamalan is writing will go on to change the world it's hard for me to watch this and not picture M night Shyamalan writing the script thinking now who should I get to play this part I'm thinking I'm thinking me yeah that seems right so Paul's got to act like a child in order for mrs. Choi to see him as innocent and tell him more of the story for some reason I got to say the first time I saw this I was incredibly confused as to what he was doing I had no I had no idea what was going on here seriously this character is only in the story for exposition that's it anyways the Nerf isn't allowed to talk about her world so they come up with this system using hand signals and gestures but then in the next scene the Nerf is telling Paul how to see the scrunt I thought you weren't supposed to talk about this shit seriously am I wrong here I thought we just learned that she wasn't allowed to talk about this stuff so apparently you can see the eyes of a scrunt in the grass but only if you use a mirror why just just seems like another random thing so they throw this big party to get the narf ready for when the giant eagle will come to take her away and they think that having everybody around the pool will confuse the scrunt with all of their sense so he won't be able to find the narf as easily by the way they don't actually know if this will work it's just a guess and of course it doesn't work so the scrunt just drags her away I just find it kind of interesting that no one noticed this girl being dragged away by a giant dog made out of grass no one saw this at all especially since she was pretty much the center of attention for everybody that knew about her I mean this whole thing was just a giant ploy to get her out in the open so that she could be taken away by the giant you know I don't care now at this point the movie they find out the interpreter is not actually the interpreter and the guild is not actually the guild basically these are all different roles that they have to take on an order for everything to work so when Paul was looking for the people to fit these roles he asked the film critic for advice in an actual interview M night Shyamalan said that the character of the film critic actually you know mr. X people and is wrong about stuff and you know the really fun thing about this is that the film critic wasn't wrong it was Paul's interpretation of what the film critic said he was wrong so they start talking about how the film critic was wrong and how could he be so arrogant yeah this this is definitely not a self-indulgent personal message to film critics from the writer of this movie I don't I don't buy that for a second then the film critic finds himself alone with the scrunt where he predicts that he's going to survive and of course he's wrong again and gets mauled to death G M tell us how you really feel to me it's blatantly obvious that this whole piece of the story is nothing more than M night Shyamalan giving a giant middle finger to film critics and telling them that they're wrong the character is even named Harry Farber gee I wonder if that's a reference to the late Mannie Farber who amongst other things was a very prolific film critic The Critic in this movie is a total jackass he's rude arrogant and comes off as a complete know-it-all which to be fair is the stereotype but it's hard not to see this as a job at the critics who don't like M night Shyamalan movies and I find it weird that he did this in the first place I mean keep in mind that this was 2006 when you look at the last few movies leading up to this like the sixth sense of breakable and signs they all did reasonably well with the critics and sure the village didn't do as well as those three from a critical standpoint but it wasn't torn to pieces like The Last Airbender it seems pretty mixed some people liked it some people did it so is this a reason to include a not-so-subtle view to the critics that didn't like it in your next movie and did I mention how well those movies all did at the box office they were incredibly successful I don't want to go too far down this road because honestly I could make a whole video just talking about this but I find it very interesting when entertainers and artists spend so much energy on the people that don't like their work look I understand it's never nice to hear someone talk negatively about your work it hurts but in the end what does it really matter now I know that sounds kind of weird coming from me because I mean I'm the guy who reviews bad movies for fun but seriously what does my opinion really matter the end nothing you make major motion pictures that make millions of dollars so who really gives a shit with someone like me thinks about your movie does everybody have to like you I must be like sure some critics have experience in a certain area of filmmaking or journalism or storytelling or whatever really doesn't matter because in the end all it boils down to is someone with an opinion that's it they either liked it or they didn't and now they're just giving their reasons as to why when was the last time you saw a movie with your friends and said at the end of the movie you know what I just have no opinion at all you're never going to please everybody and you're wasting your time if you think that you can so start focusing on the people that do enjoy your work because after all they're the reason why you're there in the first place for example there's a lot of people out there that don't enjoy my show they hate me but I don't make my videos with them in mind I make these videos for the people that do enjoy this show say again I'm getting off-track so let's get back to this movie anyways they manage to heal the narf and when the scrunt comes back the evil monkeys arrive and just beat the crap out of it which makes me wonder why are they doing it now why didn't they come out before apparently this grunt has been breaking the rules for quite some time now so it's what the holdup anyways the giant eagle comes down and takes her away to freedom wherever that is I don't own like an ocean or a lake somewhere I'm just going to assume anywhere that's not a pool in Philadelphia like I said before I understand what the movie was trying to do I understand the whole fairy tale aspect to it but for me it seemed like there was just so many things that arose throughout the story is kind of a quick fix it almost sounds as if they were making up this story as they went along but of course we know that's not true because it was written by M night Shyamalan seriously I wonder how he came up with the idea from some of these characters that he just walked outside and just start pointing at stuff and writing them down yeah dog made of grass you know giant eagle and evil monkeys and that hide in trees and there's mud and you can only see the dogs with a mirror and I've lost my mind okay now I'm done I'm done with Shyamalan movies for now so please guys don't ask me to review the village because I I really don't want to do it plus I've got I've got stuff to do I've got to uh I've got to go clean the pool yeah come on crackheads in the pool again wake up yeah wake up wake up

Channel: FanboyFlicks

Views: 361,651

Rating: 4.8649917 out of 5

Keywords: Lady In The Water (Film), Psychological Thriller (Film Genre), Paul Giamatti (Film Actor), M. Night Shyamalan (Film Director), The Sixth Sense (Award-Winning Work), Unbreakable (Film), Signs (Award-Winning Work), The Village (Film), The Happening (Film), Comedy (Film Genre), Comedy, Funny, Hilarious, Bad movies, movie reviews, Bad Movie (Film), movie review, Reviews, fanboy flicks, horrible movies, worst movies, worst movies ever made

Id: S2g3BGnVolg

Length: 17min 9sec (1029 seconds)

Published: Wed Sep 10 2014

Reddit Comments

[u/garak0410]

I like M. Night and glad he is on the rise again. When I first saw Lady in the Water, my immediate response was: Is this movie too stupid to understand or am I too stupid to understand it.

I decided to give it another try. OH, I tried. I gave it my full, unbiased attention. I really tried but this movie is such a mess and a pretentious mess at that.

So much unevenness...how do I list them?

• Why does Story not speak and use simple sign language to answer questions for a long sequence and then later, we see her talk into a walkie talkie like she is Bryce Dallas Howard and not Story? All other times, she talked in a soft, gentle voice but on the walkie talkie, she was almost like a teenager at a slumber party.

• Obviously the movie critic was pawn to trash M.Night's critics but at times, I felt like he might have an arc. Instead, this fate was quite obvious and pretentious.

• Why was Young-Soon Choi either conveniently available or just showing up when the plot needed her?

• SPOILER - Why was Cleveland so super surprised when Joey was the protector? Talk about anti-climatic.

• The pool party scene. OK, yes...the guild wasn't correct but could that seen been anymore perplexing and awful?

I could go on...I really wanted to like it but my opinion still stands.