FUNNY TINDER POSTS #16

you don't seem tender like are you here because of quarantine why are you so judgmental I'm not being judgmental I'm just asking because you just have a single picture and you don't have any bio heart girls don't need bio that's why you should have one hey what's up cuties my name is fainted and today we're gonna be taking a look at some funny tinder posts hope you'll enjoy and let's get into it message from faith to be honest I primarily swiped through the Harry Potter marathon love totally understandable but to be honest I primarily swiped because I hoped at some point I could explore your Chamber of Secrets oh dear we're in trouble you've been waiting to use that haven't you maybe Harry Potter references to get laid this is big brain time fellas Karen 24 manager Oh swipe swipe swipe get rid of her I need your kind of motivation in my life and what kind the one in your bio the universe is big and so am i oh I'm talking about my weight dating after 25 hmm learn how to be a stepdad bra can I try chat up line in Italian yeah go on then Mamma Mia oh wow that took me a minute to understand let's fight somewhere empty my tinder matches literally zero sad friends season 5 episode 16 11 minutes 25 so you maybe go on Netflix find the season get up the episode fast-forward - exactly that time when you could have sent the gift now you do in I'm so glad you did it you've made my day first time I've tried that as well I'm disappointed to say the least great hopefully you will get used to me disappointing you quickly it's gonna be having on a frequent basis go I only date six feet guys me with two feet it's not gonna work out between us son you look like Shrek when he turns handsome I can't unsee it anymore hello Laura you look pretty fly hey surf that opening palm was a little plain no problem I was just winging it so where are you from haha I see none of those jokes really took off Alex 23 imagine this we go on a date we're having a good time but you think I'm acting sort of strange I come clean and take my hat's off to reveal a rat that's been pulling my hair to control my every movement at first you're shocked but you laugh we start dating and I'm happy together one day you tell me we have to talk you fallen in love with the rats not me I'm hurt but I understand all three of us stay friends this is a reference to ratatouille or am I missing something man Nathan 27 years old event organizer who wouldn't want a relationship like Pam and Mick black belt in MMA rugby yoga love to travel I have an ever-growing list of places to visit even though I've already been to so many anyways a girl matches with the sniffing dude and he messages are saying morning so how many times have you changed your hair during lockdown a few you have a black bell in MMA haha nice I do yeah had it for a few years now MMA doesn't have a belt system though [Music] just got called out there chief well that's a bit of a weird like to make who knows maybe he got confused with the black belt he got on claude penguin back when he's like 12 years old hey if you work at Subway please don't say cuz you got a footlong or something what no I'm generally asking if you do because I thought I might saw you working at the one near my work law so do you know I don't that's strange you just gave me a footlong what is this absolutely baited damn is it just a camera angle or is your bed freaking huge probably just the angle but who knows maybe one day you could find out for yourself if you're implying that we can have a pillow fight I'd have to warn you I'm pretty deadly in the sheets I guess if you've been struggling to master key T's on tinder well this is what you gotta do maximum distance 160 kilometers show me women age range 48 to 100 plots Wow 160 kilometers away maybe 104 years old and down can you build my self-esteem back up on how bad is it well obviously not that bad as I put a half-naked pickup hey sometimes people have naked pics and they have zero self-esteem really it's more day issues for me daddy oh well then I can definitely help perfect how much do you charge an hour cuddling is 15 an hour stroking your hair while you cry is 30 choking you why you call me daddy priceless Wow what a king ladies what he's saying would you pay these prices I definitely pay someone that much to stroke my hair oh my goodness me fellas we have the most incredible little tender page here from Nick party Nick swipe right select call everyone bro will hold your drink in seven others dresses like a randomized option in game high fives every stranger country Nick swipe right to select says howdy will lie about teaching you how to two-step secretly listens to hip-hop huge truck for no reason lived in the city his entire life Punk Nick swipe right select hate the government too despises consumerism works retail will take you to concerts on a first-name basis with most people outside dive bars friendly nighttime jogging near swipe right select only jogs at night very friendly always says hi in shape forced emotions invites you over not a serial killer business Nick swipe right select uses the words synergy in normal conversation knows how to do your taxes who dress nicely knows all the cool places to eat downtown and finally elephant Nick swipe up select runaway cried at the end of Dumbo likes peanuts probably a serial killer always carries plenty of rope and if you have ever seen anyone put this much effort into that profile but honesty like if you had swipe right to choose one of these nicks to be your boyfriend which when you send I'm thinking country Nick you know it's got a huge truck and I'm sure he's got other huge things as well ah message from Brett uh my truck is older than you it probably has less wear and tear my car is younger than you and is probably more literate who has dumbest friend message to Lydia your name reminds me of only one thing Skyrim yep you got it Alex twenty-six years old let me sleep in your stupid t-shirts and hold your dumb hand you piece of sh H also very nice well then I might like you enough to give you my tin star that my friends you can't get a girl's Instagram by looking at memes all day me gets a girl's Instagram with memes my friends is it possible to learn this power okay okay hold on from now I might like you enough to suck your hmm your friends what communicating in meme language this could be the perfect relationship brewing up you match with Chloe mmm I see Leah still up at this hour what's up I swiped on accident I'm sorry as usual go ahead do the honors what I mean you said you swiped on accident yeah I did what do you mean do the honors unmatch unless you want to give me false hope oh I didn't even know you could unmatch I just got ended today Lowell professor let him you know I'll get on that that moment when you think you've match you're a really cute guy or girl and then they're just like oh sorry mate didn't actually mean to do that I knew it was too good to be true good morning yes how may I help you gonna get a large triple cheeseburger thanks there you go guys this is the tinder app not ubereats Melissa 21 pros I'm open to sharing my Netflix account can tie a cherry stalk into a knot with my tongue can eat 30 chicken nuggets in one sitting Khan used to sarcasm as a defense mechanism nocturnal will eat 30 chicken nuggets in one city oh wow you know if I ever end up going on a date at some point in my lifetime I'm gonna ask the girl if she can eat 30 chicken nuggets in one sitting because if she can't what's the point man she's never gonna meet the standards of Melissa right here girls on tinder after you asked him meets up I don't want to play with you anymore why please Emma 21 and verified Wow verified on tinder okay Student Academy of architecture college tripping and then underneath she posts a bunch of binary code hmm it's translated enter the binary code here translate and it comes up with this youtube link Rick Astley never gonna give you up oh you can't escape the rick roll even on tinder the key to my heart is peanut butter crunchy or smooth kind of girl this is not a question what exactly do you think a question is it's not a question okay let me try a different angle here you walk to your pantry to make freaking stellar PB&J you reach in the cupboard is smooth and crunch peanut butter which one do you go for I still don't understand so you're out of your friends on a Saturday night things are getting pretty wild you've already ripped off your body weights in at her and turn off the coffee table as well as half the varnish now prime to make some mistakes summer suggests you've reestablish the Soviet Union freaky you say Putin topples easily enough and the rest of the country follows you reinstate the KGB they're not allowed towards board anyone anymore you flat forbid it you're a nice person I guess they led to other measures gaining information seeking your advice the head of the KGB visits you you reiterate your ideology in disgust you walk out of the room on your way out you leave a jar of peanut butter on the counter is it chunky or smooth peanut butter what okay let's try it again it's Christmas your friend invites you to that Christmas breakup party you think why not could be fun and go along nothing too wild just a couple of drinks and some good times all of a sudden a 12-man team of radical German militants breaking fully armed and start taking hostages it shots off all communication with the outside somehow you managed to slip away unnoticed in a crude attempt to alert the authorities we set off a fire alarm naturally the militant leader is suspicious and says someone out to investigate you use your stealth and skill in arm to arm combat to overcome the militants and take his weapon and radio use the radio to contact the friend the police they investigate thinking you're just messing with them not seeing anything unusual they begin to leave in order to get their attention you for one of the dead bodies off the top of the building and it lands on a police car now you've got its attention SWAT car arrives almost immediately and starts laying siege to the building after a few more fisticuffs for the militants which end favorably for you you've a brief run-in with the leader who manages to get away damn while walking about the leader notices a picture on the desk of an employee showing you and your friend together being the Sly Fox that he is it was two and two together and uses your friend as alert to draw you into a showdown you take the bait immediately upon arrival to the top floor the leader in his cronies demands you drop your mp5 submachine gun or there will be dire consequences for your friends reluctantly you follow their demands but being the woman who's always got a plan B you begin to distract them by laughing at the situation unnoticed you reach for your beretta 93 °f which you've concealed taped your back you manage to kill one of the cronies and wound the leader he thought was back for a window and attempts to take your friend of him precariously dangling from the window of the high-rise clutching your friend's wrist the leader begins to point his gun at you out of ammo you are sorted her only thing you can find a jar of peanut butter you've got a good arm and aren't afraid to use it the jaw hits him in the head and he falls to his death your friend is saved and you all get to go home walking out you see the leaders body on the ground covered in peanut butter is it crunchy or smooth oh my goodness Matt I've never seen anyone so determined to find out if a girl prefers crunchy or smooth peanut butter you match from Michael nice size thank you I use them to see Wow that was a dumb response they're not even that good at seeing I need glasses all I want is hmm babies now I just want a little head you already have one I think you're missing the point now anyways I'm gonna leave it there guys hope you enjoyed and if you did click on the screen to check out another one thank you so much will support recently coming up close announcer that one male so uh maybe sub if you knew I'll see you guys on the next one have an absolutely amazing day much love peace [Music]

Channel: Fainted

Views: 508,603

Rating: 4.9622498 out of 5

Keywords: tinder, r/tinder, funny tinder posts, top posts, funniest tinder posts, conversations, messages, tinder messages, tinder conversations, tinder chats, meme, memes, tinder memes

Id: f9ko9hJ9zLw

Length: 13min 29sec (809 seconds)

Published: Thu Jun 18 2020