Even Ian Lara Isn’t Sure What His Race Is - Stand-Up Featuring

both my parents are actually immigrants from the Dominican Republic that's a Latin country in the Caribbean so technically I'm Hispanic but nobody ever believes me especially white people when I tell them I miss Bannock they're like Ian but you don't look Hispanic like are you sure you're not a little bit african-american and I hate that question am I sure first of all I think that's offensive and second of all of course I'm not sure I know what I look like I'm just as confused as you are have you looking for it though the politically correct term for me right now is actually African Latino and if you've never heard of that basically we're like the next big thing they compare us to Bitcoin in 2011 it's like invest down because the stock is going up you know people don't even know we were real we just came out of nowhere we're like unicorn you just popped up one day I don't know it you know talented triple-threat we could do it all dance salsa speak Spanish and stata n-word so the opportunities are endless I'm a proud Hispanic man though a lot of negative stereotypes about Hispanic men right now I had a girl tell me she don't date Hispanic men because they cheat and they can't commit to a relationship but that's the stereotype you can't always listen to what other people say like my grandparents they just celebrated 59 years of being together yeah and things are going great so they're thinking about getting married my grandmother might be the one I was raised to old-fashioned that's my problem like my parents been together a long time my grandparents together long time so I think I'm too much of a gentleman like I don't apply to modern dating because I'm too nice you can't be too nice a modern Dan like I was on a date recently I took this girl out first date I took her out and the bill came and the bill was 265 dollars and I paid it I paid it because I'm a gentleman and I'm not the kind of guy that thinks about taking you out and spent two hundred and sixty-five dollars on you then you owe me sex but mainly that's cause I don't think sex is worth two hundred and sixty-five dollars I'm the kind of guy I take you out and spend two hundred and sixty-five dollars on you now I think you owe me money like even if she wanted to I would have have sex with her that night because I don't want her to confuse that for payment I don't walking around thinking we're even it's like Miss you want me a hundred and forty five dollars do you have venmo or who do you bank with from 28 my grandparents think I should settle down they tell me settle down young there's a cuz when you settle down young you get to take romantic vacations which are partner all over the world and that sounds good to me cuz I'm tired of doing a guy's trip I'd am getting too old for that like I've done Vegas a bunch of times I've done Miami a bunch of times and that was fun but my boy came up to me the other day he was like Ian you know we still need to do and I was like what and he was like we need to go see Paris I was like I don't know if I want to go see the Eiffel Tower with my [ __ ] like that's not the type of it's not the type of vacation I want to go on I don't know if you have noticed but not every vacation is meant for you to go on with other men like I learned that the hard way cuz a couple months ago I thought it would be a good idea to go on a cruise with my best friend it was just me and him we thought it was gonna be a singles cruise we're like a bunch of single girls running around but it wasn't it was just me and my best friend on a boat with 1200 other couples for seven days straight and we both straight but after being on a boat for like three days with just couples you become a couple like that's just that's just how it works everybody partners up on cruises I didn't know that like there's a dinner where couples gotta wear matching outfits and you don't want to mess up anybody's picture so you put on matching and then people come up to you they'll see you and they'll say things like you guys look adorable you just say thanks they keep it moving you'll got time to explain to everybody that I'm not together you got to go to the saucer class on the lovers deck yeah I know how cruises work here's why you don't go on a boat with another man when you want a boat seven days that's a long time you're gonna argue but you're with another man so your arguments won't make sense you start fighting about stuff that men shouldn't be fighting about it it'll change your relationship like I got upset at my best friend at the dinner table cuz he was ordering too much dessert that's not the type of stuff men should be fighting about I know that but that's my best friend and diabetes runs in his family are now I'm gonna have to stand up you

Channel: Comedy Central Stand-Up

Views: 1,249,013

Rating: 4.9451232 out of 5

Keywords: Ian Lara, Comedy Central Stand-Up Featuring, Ian Lara comedian, Ian Lara stand up, stand up comedy, comedy central stand up, comedy, comedians, parents, Dominican Republic, Hispanic, black people, white people, Afro-Latino, Latinx, African Latino, immigrants, Hispanic men, stereotypes, grandparents, growing up, travel, Paris, Paris France, men, friends, vacation, cruise, couple, argument, fight, funny, funny video, comedy videos, funny jokes, funny clips, laugh, best comedy, best stand up

Id: HLSkXHUSQ50

Length: 6min 4sec (364 seconds)

Published: Thu Jan 17 2019