Entitled mother asked me to be less happy on my wedding day

[Music] what's the worst thing your brother sister has ever done to you so let me preface this saying this is my mum's story not mine I don't know all the details because I know it's a painful memory and I don't want to make her relive it the characters will be M my mom M entitled mum s entitled sister M D my dad my mom is the youngest of two girls she and my dad went to high school together but didn't start dating until they were both in college it was a chance meeting that they ran into each other in a bar cute story still happily married and in love 23 years later it all started when my mom got engaged my aunt was so upset because she wasn't engaged first even though she was older throughout all the planning she was pouting and kind of cold towards my mom so the day of the wedding comes my mom is getting ready with her bridesmaids she is marrying the guy she has had a crush on since high school she has her perfect venue and she's wearing her grandmother's my great-grandmother's dress everything is going absolutely perfect until my aunt starts crying my mom tried to comfort her because she is the most selfless woman in the world even though she was getting married in mere hours she was focused on her sister a little while later after my own ran off my grandmother pulled my mom aside like I said I don't know every detail but the conversation went something like this M a.m. you're really making s upset M confused what did I do M you way too happy and it's making her upset that she didn't get married before you M pardon me M can you just be a little less happy my mom was in shock this was supposed to be the happiest day of her life and here was her mother telling her to be less happy so her sister didn't get birth cert my mom's whole life she was always told to set her accomplishments aside so her sister felt special too when she was younger she was told by her parents she would never go to college because she had a hard time in school dyslexia and AD before professional help was available my mom defied all odds and graduated with a master's degree can you guess who got all the glory for graduating from college you guessed it my arms and on this day my mom wasn't having it em look mom I'm sorry that S is upset but today is about me and MD we are happy and I'm not going to hide that or pretend I'm not just so s won't be sad today is the happiest day of my life and I'm not giving that up for anyone my grandmother shut up after that she did give my mother a disapproving look though I don't even need to have been there to see it my mom still gets them all the time after that the wedding was perfect my mother still talks about it with stars in her eyes now my mother still has to deal with their sometimes but she also has my dad and us kids two of us are adults now to help stand up for her she's very happy and I'm so glad she stood up for herself there are a few stories like this that I know about but this one makes me the saddest I'm just glad she didn't let it ruin her wedding day this is going to be long I'm warning you I'm angry I'm frustrated and I'm shaking I need to write it down and hear some advice my C's is just so creepy towards my boyfriend I can't take it anymore she was really spoiled by my parents when she was young because she was their first child she always wants everything and when we were little she always used to steal my toys books clothes etc I was never allowed to touch any of her things that she constantly stole my stuff and was always rude to me my mom for some reason has always preferred her over me and us most of the time I was told to let it go due to this I have lots of resentment towards her and I don't really like her I'm honestly sick of her behavior and I just want some peace and quiet in my house my mom called me two weeks ago pleading to let my C stay with me because she doesn't have a job right now and she can't stay during quarantine both my parents are high risk my mom has heart problems and my dad is as matic so I thought I should let her stay with me and my boyfriend instead of letting her go to my parents in case she infects them there's been a few cases where she is so I didn't want to risk it now I'm honestly starting to regret it her behavior is creepy and strange and downright disgusting first of all she doesn't respect me at all she's constantly ignoring me while having long talks with my boyfriend she doesn't leave my boyfriend alone she flirts with him and constantly tries to touch him by using cheap Trick's when we watch movies she pushes me away and tries to snuggle with my boyfriend she slaps his butt when he walks by and loudly tells him how he has a perky little but she also runs her fingers through his hair every day saying how are your hair is so soft or some like that what the duck these are all just excuses to touch him she just needs a chance another thing she does is ask him if he has abs so she can touch his torso or say did you see this thing I lost maybe it's in your pocket let me see and proceeded to pat his thighs one time she wanted help with hooking her bra and she just walks out in her underwear she came to our room and my boyfriend was in the bathroom the logical thing to do is just ask me I'm her sister but what does she do she just waits for my boyfriend and asks him instead even though I'm sitting right there I think I looked very upset because my boyfriend just told her no and she went back to her room she didn't try that again this is not even all my boyfriend and I can't even talk to each other without her interrupting us she barges into our room with no warning a few days ago we were trying to have s and I don't know how she realized it and starting banging on the door claiming to have a headache I opened the door and asked her what was wrong I told her I had pills for it but she just said she doesn't trust me and she wanted to talk to my boyfriend instead after disturbing us she was suddenly completely fine and her headache disappeared miraculously she just came into bedroom and started talking to my boyfriend we were literally half naked and there was no way she didn't know this is driving me crazy what does she want why is she like this it's not like I didn't talk to her I was so angry she interrupted us because she has been doing this since she came here I was feeling horny and angry I just told her to get out and that we needed some alone time I don't want to go into details but we had a small argument and she started crying the thing is she never accepts it she's completely blind to what she's doing she denies doing it and sheds tears which ends up making me feel bad instead my boyfriend is so uncomfortable by all of this he just looks exhausted all the time he's trying his best to be nice but she's all over him all the time he's usually very introverted shy quiet he's not very confrontational and I know this is bothering him when I talk to him about it he just commented that it was a bad idea to invite her to stay here he also said not to invite her ever again I want to know why she is like this how can I make her see what she's doing I'm done dealing with her I don't want to see her ever again but she's my parents favorite child and no matter how hard I try I can never escape her whenever I try to cut contacts with her my mom calls me and begs me to forgive her my mom doesn't want to see her daughter's fighting with each other and she always says how she wants us to be together forever but I can't do this how am I supposed to deal with this can someone please tell me my mom is always taking my sister's side in everything and it's always me who has to be understanding and smart and elder when I'm the younger one here please tell me I'm not overreacting how do I make my mom and sister realize that I'm sick of dealing with this hi first of all I'd like to thank each and every one of you for your help I'm really grateful for the support I've received here and all those little messages some of you sent me really made me understand the situation I was in the many many comments I read here gave me the strength I needed to talk to my sister thank you guys I should probably tell you that this might not be the perfect batter ending you all were expecting and I apologize for that I've always had a hard time standing up against my sister like I said in my original post my boyfriend doesn't like confrontations either and he's also a huge people pleaser which makes this situation harder for both of us nevertheless I finally decided to talk to my sister yesterday she was actually sitting in my living room in her underwear and bra and I completely lost my sh I told her multiple times to wear some clothes but she said it was too hot which it was not she then made a small comment about me being insecure about my boyfriend liking her or something like that and that made me angry i sat her down and we talked I told her she was making me uncomfortable she was making my boyfriend uncomfortable and we wanted her to leave she looked very shocked by it because I don't think I have ever talked to her like that she immediately apologized though she said she didn't know or some nonsense which I wasn't going to fall for this time I gave her an ultimatum she needed to pack her sh and get out in three hours she looked very emotional and she apologized a lot said sorry a lot and told me she loved me she said she would never intentionally try to hurt me if I misunderstood her actions it wasn't her fault she kept saying she didn't know she said she was just trying to be friendly to my boyfriend which is not true at all I asked her if romantically harrassing someone was friendly to her and she started crying by this time my boyfriend who was in our bedroom avoiding my sister and her skimpy clothing came to support me she kind of directed her questions towards him she asked him if she was making him uncomfortable he said yes and she cried and apologized she then tried to gain his sympathy by saying that I was kicking her out when she had no place to go she also lied that I was always mean to her she completely ignored me and asked him if she could stay she had nowhere else to go of course he said no what the duck did she think I will forever remember the look on her face so yeah she actually refused to leave cried a lot and said she was jobless and she didn't have money no place to stay no friends etc I told her she had no friends because she was a B the first time I said something like this to my sister she then tried to guilt-trip me to let her stay by repeating the words I'm your sister family I love you etcetera me and my boyfriend helped her pack all her stuff and put it next to her car I told her that she can stain her car I didn't care I wanted her to go it wasn't really epic like some of you wanted I was actually crying a little while I was shouting at her because I was shaking so much at one point my boyfriend had to tell me to calm down it was just so overwhelming I'm just glad she's gone she did leave eventually she was calling someone and I'm pretty sure she went back to her own flat thank god she's not going to my parents because I don't think she knows how to quarantine I know she won't quarantine and this was the main reason I was hesitant to kick her out two to three hours after she left my mom called me and yelled at me for kicking her out I shouldn't have been shocked when she accused my boyfriend of bothering my sister my mom also asked me what kind of man I was dating I should leave him etcetera i sholde have expected that really I tried to reason with her but my mom was just angry at me she asked me things like how can you do this to your own sister and similar nonsense she should be asking my sister at that point I was so so angry I was in tears and shaking I just told her Todd yet lost in anger and hung up it was just a weird day I'm proud of myself for finally standing up to my sister but I also don't really feel like getting up from my bed my boyfriend is back to his cheerful self and I'm happy about that but I just feel like such an idiot I shall realize my mom would never take my side a long time ago I just don't understand what I did to make my mom so angry at me why doesn't she love me I have done everything she asked me to do but she never takes my side in things I just wanted to love me and support me for once it just never happens and I feel like I'm an idiot for even trying I think she regrets I was even born anyway duck that I'm done trying to reason with them my mom will never believe me pretty sure my sister lied to her so mom keeps calling and trying to speak to my boyfriend I'm currently thinking of cutting off all of my family all they do is make me feel like I deserve better than that my boyfriend deserves better than that I apologize for venting what's done is done I don't regret it I'm glad I have my boyfriend and he loves me unlike my family and we finally have some alone time he's been so moody but right now he's actually cooking and stuff and he hasn't done that ever since sister came here so yeah I'm glad she's gone my boyfriend is glad she's gone I finally have some peace and quiet in my home thank you so much to everyone I don't think I can thank you all enough some of you talk to me sent me messages and it really opened my eyes I'll take care of myself and my boyfriend now thank you so I've 20 female I had a boyfriend let's call him John John 20 male and I started dating when we were 17 I have a big family I have my mom 53 my dad 55 milder twin sisters that are 34 and my younger sister 19 my sisters both have husbands and kids in my younger sister lives at home and works for the family business I live in a condo with boyfriend he's always been close with my family around two weeks ago I was ordering post mates on my boyfriend's phone and he got a message from my younger sister I was feeling naazy and opened up their message thread for two months they've been hooking up and sending nudes in that moment I flipped out and took screenshots I sent them to myself and deleted the evidence I acted like nothing happened and luckily the next day John was gonna go visit his mom in another state the next day after he left to drive to his mom I sent them to my mom my dad in both my other sisters my whole family was disgusted that day I left the car because it's in his name so I didn't have any commitment legally to it then my sister's husband's helped move me into my parents house it all happened in a day and when my sister got to my parents house all her stuff was outside the house she tried coming in and my dad went outside and started screaming at her my other sisters both went outside and they all yelled at her and told her that she was a disappointment to the family my dad fired her on the spot my older sister's husband is a lawyer so he gave my dad some legal advice on how to cover himself he told her to get lost she was crying and I came outside I threw the condo keys at her and told her to go move in with my boyfriend since they are so close I told her I knew everything before she could say anything I went inside there was some more yelling for about 20 minutes and my dad came in he said milder sisters had to leave and we watched movies I sent the screenshots to my boyfriend and blocked him over the past two weeks my sister has been trying to contact everyone she had to be escorted off my parents property two times already I heard from my friend my boyfriend got home two days ago and say my sister had been living at his house he kicked her out and has been trying to contact me she is essentially homeless and jobless and I don't know or care what's happening to her right now I haven't had to go to work since the issue that's happening in the world my family is completely behind me but my friends are saying I shouldn't have done all that to my younger sister the way I see it she deserved it so am I the a my future husband and I are planning our wedding for August 2021 we got engaged back in August 2000 and 19 and we wanted a longer engagement which ended up being a blessing because of everything going on in the world right now anyway as soon as I got engaged I knew my future husband and I wanted a small wedding party I'm only having my sister as my maid of honor and future husband is only having his best friend as his best man but I've noticed since my engagement that my sister is trying to make everything about her and hardly seems happier my planned nuptials some background my sister is an attention W I can't have a conversation with someone around her without her bringing the subject back to herself my engagement hasn't been any different she's mentioned multiple times since my engagement that she wants her current boyfriend to propose this year I have no idea if this is something they've discussed or if she's trying to force him into doing it she apparently thought it was going to happen on her birthday but when it didn't she was really upset she said that after he proposes this year hypothetically she wants to get married next summer July 2021 a month before me while I know I can't control this she keeps bringing it up when I mentioned something about my upcoming wedding trying to make it all about her over Christmas she came with me to see a venue I'd been dying to see she made orful joking comments to me about how she's going to get super drunk at my wedding and cause a scene and throw up on my dress it was really just a strange comment to make when the bride is your sister she's also been reluctant to make an effort as a maid of honor she blatantly told me I don't know what to do as a maid of honor so don't be surprised if you don't have a bridal shower or whatever I haven't asked her for anything either I'm just expecting nothing from her at this point I told her she can wear basically whatever she wants as the maid of honor which lead her to tell me she wants to get a boob job this year and have a dress that shows them off my future husband and I have been together seven years now and have been waiting for the right time to get engaged and married I said to my mom that it's unfair for her to keep bringing up the hypothetical wedding engagement plans when things are supposed to be focused on me for once but my mom keeps saying it would be a blessing if both of her daughters ended up getting married at the same time even when I brought up her awful comments my mom keeps saying I need to learn to take a joke would I be in a to ask someone else to be my maid of honor I want to enjoy this time with her and feel like I just can't because of her jealousy that she's not the one in the spotlight

Channel: Ask Girl

Views: 62,220

Rating: 4.9179811 out of 5

Keywords: reddit sister, reddit wedding, reddit girl, reddit entitled parents, reddit parents, reddit, askreddit sister, askreddit weddng, askreddit girl, entitled parents, r/ wedding, r/ sister, r/askreddit, sister jealous of my wedding

Id: BI0hxrdbWXw

Length: 19min 59sec (1199 seconds)

Published: Sat May 02 2020